Chapter 38: Prelude

"Your highness, welcome!"

Izaya smiled. They had arrived at a village not too far from the castle. After visiting various farmers, villages and a few merchants living further off they had circled all the way back to their own lands.

The sun was slowly starting to touch the tip of a nearby forest's trees when Izaya strolled down the muddy path.

People had heard of the king's visit and got everyone together for a quick gathering. There were stalls handing out drinks and a few wives giving away the bread they baked at home.

It was like a giant gettogether of a family and Izaya was amidst them all.

Gaze wandering not far from Shizuo he saw nothing but smiles.

News had traveled far it seemed- after today's visits the king's impression on his own folk had bettered considerably and that idea triggered nothing but joy in Izaya's mind.

Shizuo shone like a gold jewel amidst his people. Strong, yet gentle and generous in so many ways he had finally proven his worth.

It was mesmerizing in a way.

To look at Shizuo, breezing through his new duties despite his fear of failure- it showed a certain kind of strength of character that somehow charmed Izaya more than it should.

A tug on the side of his dress forced Izaya's attention off the king as he faced a child instead.

Young, maybe four years old at most she was standing next to him, offering what appeared to be a ring made of flowers.

"Is this for the king?" Izaya asked, but the girl shook her head with a giggle.

Ah-

Of course.

This was a flower wreath meant to be worn by a woman- he was the woman.

"For me?" he quickly asked, masking pleasant surprise as he lowered himself into a crouch. Careful as to not let his dress soak in the muddy round he picked the fabric up around the edges.

Quick and fluid he bowed in a way that allowed the girl to put the wreath onto his head.

The silky surface of fresh petals and woven leaves tickled the tips of his ears and he suppressed a chuckle. The girl was trying her best to adjust her present in the best way.

"Thank you very much," Izaya quickly said, and the girl's face lit up in delight. A quick messy bow only capable of being shown by a young girl her age was executed and with that she quickly dashed off, into the direction of what Izaya appeared to be her mother.

Izaya couldn't help but smile fondly as he remained in his crouch for a second longer.

It was soothing.

This entire place. The people, the warmth they welcomed them with.

Izaya suddenly found himself back at his mansion. His siblings had always loved to celebrate their birthday with a small fire in the garden. He didn't really get why, but apparently they had picked the habit up from a few commoner children they played with whenever their maids weren't looking.

Dancing around the fire accompanied by the smell of freshly grilled meat, Izaya couldn't help but reminisce about those times.

A smile softened his expression.

As the new queen he should join the king in his presence and show himself as a matching counterpart to the gentle king.

And so he pushed himself off the ground- and the ground screamed.

Screamed so loud it tore his ears-

Izaya knew what was happening before he felt it and his eyes squeezed shut as he reached for a barrel not too far.

Desperate like a drowning man in the midst of the sea he clung to the splintered wood as if his life depended upon it.

Knuckles turned white and the high pitched sound erased what was left of the warmth as seeping cold marched into his chest.

Weight of unknown kind pulled his chest down and Izaya opened his eyes to blurriness.

It happened.

This sort of sudden dizziness.

Every once in a while. He knew it was coming when that sound went off in his ears and he had learned to react accordingly.

Reach for something to hold onto.

Stay still.

Wait.

Just for a bit.

That was what he had to do.

Especially now when the king had finally given a good impression on his people- who was he to overshadow all his efforts with gossip about how the queen collapsed?

The conclusions would be endless- he could already envision few of many, stating how Shizuo was hitting his wife or forcing her to accompany him, how he was only putting up facades after all-

This was really the worst timing.

A bitter smile decorated his features as he waited for the wafting waves to stop pushing his head around.

Forcing his eyes back open Izaya tried to regain control over his body, but the dizzy spell loved to rotate his vision all around.

It was just then that he noticed a shadow next to his own.

"Are you okay?"

Shizuo. Of course it was him.

Of course he had noticed right away that something was off. "You look pale."

Cursing the blond's timing and perception Izaya straightened his stance and prayed for his balance to last.

This was not the time to be weak.

"Of course I am," Izaya quickly assured with every ounce of honesty he could muster, but his eyes didn't meet Shizuo's gaze and the smile the king had shown dropped faster than a dead head off a corpse.

The hand that shot forward to grasp Izaya's wrist was fast and maybe even a bit tight. But forced to meet Shizuo's gaze, Izaya spotted no anger in his serious eyes.

He seemed mad, yet he was not. What was this?

"The truth," Shizuo demanded, and somehow Izaya found himself unable to call upon words of pretense as he was confronted with eyes filled with honesty and worry.

"... I'm a little dizzy, but it's okay," he whispered, his eyes quickly side viewing their surroundings as he didn't want anyone to listen in.

"Are you sure?" Shizuo whispered back, and Izaya sighed.

"Yes."

He actually was. He didn't feel cold anymore. The opposite, pleasant warmth seemed to settle everywhere in his body instead to the point that Izaya would have almost said it was a bit too much.

Silence interrupted by the folk's cheers only followed in which Shizuo said not a single word.

A woman was the first to break the moment as she approached from the side

"Your highness, if you would like to join-" she asked and Shizuo's body stiffened.

Faster than Izaya was able to complain, the blond turned, "Excuse me please, but my wife needs some rest after this long day. I hope you can forgive us for our shortened visit."

Izaya knew Shizuo was going to say something along those lines and clicked his tongue.

"No, no it´s fine, it was an honor to have you," the woman quickly added and Shizuo's gaze trailed to his wife.

Ah.

Izaya was glaring.

Frustration seemed to be the emotion ruling Izaya overall as Shizuo offered his arm.

The message was clear.

This was not to be negotiated, and with as much happiness as a cat getting soaked in rain Izaya took his arm before following him into the carriage.

The door was closed, the coachman flicked the reins and the horses took off.

Faster than Izaya liked them to, they were gone from the small village and he sighed in defeat.

"... you didn't need to leave." Trees passed by and the sun kissed the tip of the mountains goodbye as the sky settled into a dark creamy color of beige and orange.

"Do you really think I could concentrate on anything else when my wife is suffering?" Shizuo asked with honesty that was rivaled by nothing on this earth.

Rolling his eyes, Izaya complained, "It's not that bad."

"It doesn't have to get worse for me to start caring."

Ah.

Eyes tearing themselves away from the landscape Izaya couldn't help but drop the dissatisfied expression he had been wearing as he gazed at the king.

Nothing but worry and care reflected in that brown mocca tone and Izaya found himself disarmed.

…wasn't he being unfair? Acting this sweet- how was Izaya supposed to stay mad?

Lowering his gaze the familiar feeling of guilt resurfaced instead and his eyes narrowed.

"...you really are a saint," Izaya started and Shizuo tilted his head in mild confusion. "You cover for me, about the lie being your wife, you take care of me, hell you are not even angry at me." Izaya elaborated and recognition appeared on Shizuo's features despite the quick change of topic.

"I can understand why you did it," the king spoke slowly, "In your position… I would have done the same."

"Wow, you, wearing a dress? Hard to imagine." The smile that answer forced on Shizuo's face was priceless and he gazed at Izaya.

"Well, not everyone fits these fabrics like you do." Izaya snorted, the king was obviously joking and Izaya joined the mild game of wits.

"Is that why you forgave me so quickly?" he chuckled with the hint of a flirtatious smile- and suddenly the king fell silent.

Palm finding its way to his own cheek Shizuo suddenly seemed quite lost in an answer as he kept their gaze.

Almost as if he were wondering about the answer himself.

"Might be."

The words came as much unexpected as they formed a riddle in Izaya's head.

It was almost as if they held some meaning but Izaya couldn't figure out what kind.

But that didn't stop the warmth that crept into his chest.

he felt really warm

"So, how are you feeling?" Shizuo quickly asked after clearing his throat, snapping Izaya out of his thoughts.

A quick huff was given as Izaya was reminded of why they were currently heading back earlier than intended.

"I told you. I was just a little dizzy, nothing serious," he repeated earnestly, but Shizuo didn't seem to buy it.

"You look way too pale for it to be nothing serious," Shizuo argued and Izaya groaned.

"Are you a doctor?"

"Are you?"

This guy-

Groaning internally, Izaya gave up on trying to convince Shizuo of his well-being. What point was there if he doubted everything he said anyway?

"I'm guessing you will lock me up in our room?" Izaya questioned with slight annoyance lingering in his voice and Shizuo chuckled.

"The rumors would be hilarious if I did that."

Snorting softly, Izaya met Shizuo's gaze. "I meant metaphorically."

"I know."

A soft breeze picking up now that the sun was about to set crawled its way past one of the cracks in the carriage. Cold like a slithering snake it crawled up Izaya's thighs.

It caused him to shudder softly and he tugged his dress a bit closer.

"Are you cold?"

The question came faster than Izaya realized Shizuo had noticed and his lips failed him in an answer.

Was he cold?

No- … yes?

He couldn't tell. He was both somewhat, especially his chest and head felt heavy and warm, but his arms, thighs-

Before he could answer, the cloak Shizuo had worn dropped on Izaya.

"Try to sleep. This was an exhausting day. It won't take too long to arrive home," Shizuo announced curtly and Izaya was left to do nothing but blink upon the gesture and order.

He wanted to protest, wanted to say he didn't need the cloak, nor sleep- and yet the moment Shizuo mentioned the possibility Izaya's body grew tired tenfold.

Sleep- actually sounded amazing.

Sighing softly, Izaya swallowed his pride and complaints and snuggled up in the warmth and smell that was Shizuo. Sleep.

Just a little would be fine, right?

Leaning against the frame of the carriage, Izaya's eyes slipped shut.

Just for a second.

Soothing calmth radiated from the warmth of the sinking sun.

So that he could show Shizuo that he was healthy, that everything was fine.

The stuttering halt the cardiage came to forced Izaya into a sitting position and he blinked startled.

Darkness had grazed the horizon, the sun was gone and Izaya realized with the soft sting of warmth grazing his cheek that he had fallen asleep.

"Good morning."

Amused if nothing less Shizuo was still sitting opposite to him wearing an extremely pleased expression.

"Did you watch me sleep?" Izaya asked with the slightest hint of an abashed frown.

"What if I did?"

"Creepy if you ask me."

Shizuo snorted and got up from his seat. "Ready to get locked up?"

Izaya chuckled. "Always."

And with that the door opened. Either Shizuo had given the guy some kind of perfect hint or he happened to move by chance but the timing was perfect.

Stepping out of the carriage Shizuo was the first to leave causing the vehicle to shake softly.

Horses neighed and the butler that had led the horses bowed as he signed for Izaya to get out as well.

"My queen," he said and held the door open.

Quickly grasping the sides of his dress Izaya nodded and rose from his seat.

It was just a step, maybe two, nothing more, nothing less, nothing exhausting nor tremendously straining- and yet the moment Izaya's feet touched the ground, vertigo crashed into him harder than ever felt before.

Heavy as though he was shouldering a carriage filled with bricks the ground laughed as it called for Izaya's body.

Within a single second Izaya's confidence, consciousness and ability to breathe swayed as the air grew incredibly thin.

He felt as though he had stepped into a swamp, thick and dark that was pressuring him from all sides to go down.

He felt weak, his surroundings tilted and before he knew it he felt himself tilt as well.

"Shizuo-" the name spilt from his lips fast and undoubtedly grazed with panic and Shizuo turned on the spot.

He hadn't seen what happened, he didn't know what was going on and yet pure instinct made him reach out for Izaya. Hands were quickly on Izaya's body, around his hip, his arm, securing his stance at least as Izaya held onto the blond.

"Sorry, just a moment-" Izaya wheezed, but the dizziness didn't stop, his body suddenly felt hot and out of control-

What was going on?

He couldn't make sense of anything.

Suddenly Shizuo's hand moved to Izaya's neck. Softly as if petting a freshly born cat he touched the skin there and his gaze grew dark.

Izaya was burning up- and it was cold outside.

The fact how Izaya had been freezing inside the carriage suddenly sent goosebumps down Shizuo's spine.

Within seconds Izaya felt Shizuo's body stiffen and his voice grow hard and anxious.

"Call for Shinra." What he called was an order, not a request, calmly spoken yet spiked with no wish for second opinions or words of reluctance.

They were probably aimed at the servants as well as Izaya all the same.

Casting his gaze upwards Izaya could see Shizuo's expression- he could see his worry, and the way Izaya was yet again relying on the king.

And yet he couldn't find himself guilty or embarrassed. Not even when Shizuo suddenly swept him off his feet.

Shizuo was just there.

And Izaya was glad he was- the knowledge made him feel safe, comforted. Just as the warmth that crept through his skin and the arms that held him securely in place.

As if Shizuo's mere presence was a guarantee that everything was going to be okay.

Everything following was filtered by some sort of haze. Izaya knew Shizuo had carried him inside the castle.

But then…? He had no idea.

The next thing he knew he was laying in a bed in a moist chamber he had seen before.

His head was resting on a cushion and a heavy blanket had been dropped on his body. It took Izaya a moment to realize that it wasn't the blanket that was heavy, but Shizuo's arm that was resting on it.

Sitting on the bed's ledge he kept it there as if he were able to defend Izaya from whatever it was that had set him out of order.

"He is sick."

A familiar voice spoke and Izaya moved his head slightly in order to locate its source. The doctor. Izaya recognized the guy standing at the fireplace. His expression was serious as he talked to the king.

"Can't you do anything?" Shizuo asked, and Izaya felt the palm resting on the bed sheet tighten into a fist.

"Oh, my fellow colleagues would be quick to let him bleed but-"

"It's not good for him?"

"I'm not even sure if it's good in general." Thick silence filled the room as both parties seemed to contemplate their next actions.

"If anything, I could try to give him a set of herbs but.." the doctor faded out and Shizuo's gaze dropped to the ground.

"You know you are the only doctor I trust," Shizuo whispered and the doctor's gaze dropped as much as the room temperature of his words.

"Just because I would have advised a different treatment for your mother doesn't mean I was right."

Izaya swallowed, the topic known to be a heavy one and his eyes circled to Shizuo. He couldn't quite see his expression as he was facing his back, but he didn't need to, to know he was causing him to relive a painful memory right now.

"You still have the best odds." Shizuo whispered and Izaya swallowed hard.

Pushing himself up, Izaya cleared his throat. "I'm fine, I was just a little dizzy-" but Shizuo's hand was quicker on his shoulder than Izaya was to move as he gently forced him back down.

Surprised, albeit not offended, Izaya looked at Shizuo - he expected an angry expression, a sad one- instead he only faced worry and infinite care.

"Stay down, please." he whispered and Izaya didn't have the heart to talk back. The expression he wore, the fact that he pleaded, it made Izaya's heart sink far lower than he thought possible.

A deep sigh followed from the doctor as he scurried over to a set of pots and herbs.

"But-" Izaya tried softly but faded out anyway. What was he even supposed to say?

That he didn't want Shizuo to suffer just because he was feeling under the weather? What could he do about it except nothing?

"Do me the favor, okay? Sleep. Rest." Shizuo repeated and Izaya nodded.

He didn't have any other choice anyway - having lost consciousness for a moment he could already feel the dark clutches of the very same reclaim him once more.

Faster than he liked, everything turned into a haze. Pictures and memories mixed into each other as he drifted off into a fever dream.

He dreamed of his father, his siblings, good dreams, dizzy dreams-

Of Shizuo.

The glances he cast, the smiles he smiled, the fireplace and the way the flames had accentuated his jawline. His smile had been so gentle, but also capable and uncompromising in just the right way.

Power of various senses radiated off the blond and yet all Izaya felt was safety in his presence.

And the way the glances Shizuo gave him made his chest feel tighter than his illness.

to be continued~