Chapter 23: Human
"The director will drop by later in the week, Vlad. He's found something else to try and banish the ghost inhabiting you, and he wishes to speak with you before trying anything."
Vlad could have nodded and said it was understandable, considering what had happened with the last attempt at a cure. He could have asked if June knew more on the subject of that proposition. He could have pretended to hope for good results.
He did none of that, too busy looking fixedly ahead.
June hadn't noticed, yet. But she would soon, the moment she turned around, away from the saline bag – Vlad had thrown up more often than usual during the last three days – and back towards him.
His left eye had gone entirely red, and he couldn't do anything about it.
There was no blood or reddish tears pooling at his eyes this time – not yet, perhaps – but Vlad knew what was going on here. His eye had to look like blood vessels had popped all over the white of it, his iris had to be crimson instead of dark blue, the pupil had to be faintly glowing with a sick, scarlet light.
He knew it, because those were the only times his sight shifted into hues of red and glowing pink, the only times he saw things that were not there with his normal human blue eyes.
Right now he could see the large mess of fabric on June's uniform where he'd vomited blood on her sleeve two days before – and it hadn't been there before, she'd had the uniform cleaned after the fact, and yet. For all he knew it wasn't even the same uniform set. and yet
Right now he could still see the bloodied handprint on the wall by the bathroom's door, even though months had passed since it'd been washed off.
Right now he couldn't look at his bed sheets and not see a hundred stains of tears and sweat and blood and ectoplasm and vomit where he knew he'd trashed and turned in pain and agony.
Nothing of all that was actually there, but his eye red crimson abnormal still showed it to him, no matter what. It knew what was there, even if it wasn't anymore – just like it knew where the blood flowed in June's and his own body where it didn't too, through the skin and flesh, pulsating without failure as life remained utterly still where none did.
If Vlad closed his left eye, everything was normal again.
there were two of him the eye that saw what was and the eye that saw what wasn't and today it was right and left but last week it had been left and right and he had no idea of what it would be next time
there were two of him and they never were the same
Had June ever seen his eyes like that? She had to, right? Vlad couldn't believe she hadn't been there at least once, but he couldn't remember...
what if she saw and understood the truth
what if she realized
what if
"Vlad, are you..."
June's hand on his cheek, and Vlad – Vlad couldn't...
Something clenched in his throat, and June's presence became blurry to his sense for a second. Dry heaving, Vlad could feel tears pulling at his eyes one blue and one red the world around him pulsating in bloody colors. Something was pushing scratching inside him forcing doors open heavily from his chest, a wave of cold and fear taking over.
His dead fingers gripped the bed sheet he could hear it ripping apart.
no no no no no can't please don't no
He knew what was happening. It wasn't the first time.
the mirror in front of him
There hadn't been anyone else the other times.
voices outside asking him to open the door to let them in to let them help
In between empty retching and swirling green and purple cold and dead nausea, Vlad's eyes darted to his arms, his legs – everywhere his skin was visible, everywhere he could guess the flow of his blood with his cursed eye.
Of course he was right – of course this was it. The skin was turning blue in several places, the blood wasn't flowing anymore in those parts. The cadaver blue unnatural color kept creeping further, slowly taking over the rest of his body – and there was nothing he could do to stop it, to hide it, not truly. If it didn't stop, if it went all the way – there, he could feel it spreading around now, his flesh cold and hard and dead – if it reached his face, if June saw it too...
left forearm third finger of the right hand tip of the nose right heel
like ink stains growing larger and permeating paper until they met and there was no white left
June had stopped talking to him.
Vlad didn't want to look at her, to see her face. He looked down, hid behind his thin breakable tired arms without even meaning to. He didn't want to know, didn't want to see, couldn't bear to look up.
what if she was worried what if she was angry what if she was terrified
for him
of him
He did, still, when her touch on his wrists pushed his hands black and red and dead but at least not blue like a corpse away from his face.
The nurse friend seemed absolutely horrified and distressed, but she friends don't come to visit do they? was still reaching for him, her eyes searching for something in his face, upset and terrified. Vlad didn't know what she thought of all this, couldn't tell what she believed to be happening, but.
a glowing circle by her chest purple and vibrant under her uniform
Blood rolled down his other blue normal eye and everything shifted.
both eyes blue skin what else what more what secret remained?
Vlad stared at the pendant he could distinguish despite the clothes, still radiating purple even as he could only see reds and pinks anymore.
what was it what something was wrong it felt wrong as if
"Leave him alone."
Vlad blinked at June with his red eyes his dead skin his cold wrists in her hands his canines that were too sharp his ears too pointed, scared and uncomprehending.
The nurse looked absolutely incensed, her grip growing tighter on his wrists.
He couldn't understand what she was saying – why she'd said that. Who was he meant to leave alone, what was he supposed to do? He'd understand the fear and the confusion, but he couldn't get the anger.
Why was June angry at him?
What had he done?
"...I'm..."
Something was wrong with the tone of his voice. He'd never tried speaking the other times he'd started... started what? Transforming? Was that what it was? Was it going to eventually take him entirely like now maybe already didn't you notice and then...
And then.
maybe he'd be dead for good then maybe his corpse would stop lying and finally fall into death
maybe he'd still be there and this wouldn't be the end
maybe there was no end to the terror
...June.
She did look terrified. Her face was ashy, greyer than usual, her eyes wide and the line of her mouth kept trembling.
Still, she wasn't backing down.
"You're the ghost, right? The one doing all this to Vlad."
Vlad's voice died in his throat – he didn't know what to say anyway. June thought...
Something inside him resonated with the glowing pendant – and defeaning screeching filled his ears, but June didn't seem to hear it only him. Vlad couldn't focus, couldn't answer – the pendant was abnormal, it was doing this, he couldn't explain but did he even know how?
His right arm jerked towards the purple light, accidentally pushing June away.
Vlad froze – his arm was entirely blue and cold and hard except the hands the fingertips as black and red and dead as usual but most importantly it was glowing too. A pale and sick light gleamed along his limbs, like an illusive curtain of otherness to set him apart from the world of the livings.
like something that didn't belong
June's jaw tensed as she forced herself to stay still and look him in the eyes:
"Let him go!"
Vlad couldn't say a word his voice was wrong the pendant was screeching in his ears and yet yet June's voice kept ringing clearer through but he couldn't manage an answer.
He backed up against the wall by his bed, tried to...
The round pendant – hidden, invisible to normal eyes but not to his sight of scarlets – pulsed again – stronger, faster, louder – and Vlad recoiled once more. Everything was bright pink for a second, bathed in blinding light. His entire corpse body tore away, snatched from his sensations and he couldn't breathe breathe a flash of green pain please hurts can't breathe "banzai!" something burns help please.
The pink light flashed dark.
Everything stopped.
The screeching wasn't there anymore. Neither was the cold, or the sight that came from the red eyes, or the stiffness in his fingers.
Everything was normal.
Vlad could still feel the tears – bloodied, sticky – in his lashes and down his cheeks, or the slight pain that followed being tense for too long, but...
He felt human again.
or at least
his body wasn't overtly dead anymore
"Are you alright? Vlad?"
June.
He took a deep breath – wobbled a bit, too – and searched for the nurse.
She was standing a few feet away, holding onto her right arm gingerly – something twisted in his guts, a dark certainty that whatever had happened exactly, he'd done something, he'd hurt her somehow. Maybe when he'd pushed her back.
"I..."
Vlad blinked four times, shook his head. He couldn't feel or see the pendant anymore. It didn't mean it wasn't there, but...
Two men in white burst in with old-school blades – most likely iron – looking ready to pummel anything without a pulse. One of them was holding onto a small bag with something white inside.
They looked around aggressively, their sharpened gazes barely lingering on June and Vlad himself – looking, he realized, for the ghost that had triggered the clinic's alarms.
looking for him
June stepped between them and her patient. He heard her sigh in relief as tension escaped her body.
"I... I think he's gone now."
Vlad winced behind her back. He didn't think it was just that easy. He might have been wrong about the ghost not likely inside him – perhaps it had been sent away but it still didn't explain any of the things that had happened to him did it – but just because he was now feeling normal – still sick, still feeble, still...
June turned a bit to look at him again, her expression searching and kind and worried:
"It's good news, right? Vlad?"
His eyes fell on his hands – normal, pale and thin fingers with no necrosis left anywhere in sight – and he didn't say anything.
He was feeling sick again.
Vlad doubled over – felt the one fang hidden behind his lower lip, the only remnant of the slow and maddening so slow you'd think it wasn't happening so maddening you'd look in the mirror and feel something was abnormal about your own reflection transformation he'd been going through for the last year, the fact that put the lie of recovery on the spot – and started retching again.
First complete transformation for Vlad - and almost a complete turning-back-human, almost - but he still doesn't have any kind of control.