Scarlett rushed out of the workshop searching for any sign of Tony. He was scared. She wanted to make sure he was okay. There was a familiar feeling, an understanding, that it wasn't a phone call or bathroom emergency or anything like that. No, Scarlett recognized that sort of fear and wondered: what did she do when it was her?

The stairwell. Tony hadn't gotten the grand tour or anything, but there was a sign on the door and it was just to the right of the nearby elevator. Sure enough, when she stepped into the stairwell, she found Tony Stark. He was seated on the steps with his head in his hands, struggling to catch his breath. He was pale and covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Elbows on his knees, Tony hung his head, gripping at his hair, knuckles white.

He knew Scarlett had followed him. He wished she hadn't. He wished that more than anything. Having someone he was trying to impress seeing him this way was an actual nightmare. Not only did he not have any control over his feelings, but he wasn't sure he could control what he said or did either.

Scarlett approached him slowly. It didn't bother him at first, but when she reached to rest her hand upon his shoulder to offer comfort, he lost it.

"Back the hell off!" He hissed, out of breath and haggard. Much to his surprise, she didn't get upset. She didn't ask what his problem was or call him crazy. Instead, she took a few careful steps backwards and held her hands up to let him know she wouldn't touch him. "Leave me alone."

"Stark." Scarlett began in a soft voice and he hated that she was going to assure him that she wouldn't leave. For someone he barely met that morning, she was behaving in a surprising way. Considering he'd stormed out of her workshop and was now having a meltdown in the stairwell, he expected her to be furious- not worried. Was she worried? Tony couldn't keep eye contact long enough to judge.

She sounded worried, though.

"I'm fine. Leave me alone." Tony snapped at her again, hoping he would make her angry enough to leave.

"I'm sorry, but I can't do that." Scarlett shook her head no in case he was having a hard time hearing.

Tony stared at her, mouth agape. She really wasn't going to leave him? Couldn't she see he needed her to go away? He expected to find pity behind her eyes but there was none. Didn't she see the pathetic creature he'd become?

But she was worried. He could see that clearly now. She was extremely worried. About him?

Despite her insistence on staying, Scarlett turned on her heels. He thought she might have told him to wait a moment but he couldn't quite recall. She disappeared out the door, careful to keep it from slamming. Why would she bother? Tony hung his head and focused on taking slow, shaky deep breaths because it was just about the only thing he could think to do. His heart was pumping too hard and too fast. His head was swimming. The ringing in his ears was going to drive him mad.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" He exhaled desperately. It was only a damn picture of Manhattan! How could that trigger something so violent and terrifying? There had to be more to it. Maybe something only he'd noticed. Was there poison being pumped into the office? A hallucinogen? But then why wouldn't she be impacted? No, that was crazier than panic would be.

It was just a video.

He had to keep reminding himself that Manhattan was a good six hour drive away and an hour long flight. The more he tried to rationalize it, the worse he felt for panicking. He lost feeling in his fingers. All because of a damn video. A video through the screen of Scarlett's computer. Nothing happened in that video to cause this. And even if it had, he was far away from it- and safe as could be.

Why couldn't he control himself? New York wasn't a scary place. He'd grown up there! He knew Manhattan better than he knew anywhere in California, for christ's sake! And yet, he somehow couldn't look at his former home without losing complete control of his senses.

Despair spread like cancer throughout his stomach as he realized how broken he must be for this to be so damaging. He'd thought today had been tremendous progress. He'd thought he'd been cured. Instead, he was practically fighting tears like a moody teenager in a stranger's stairwell.

"How pathetic. How stupid."

The sound of the door opening made him jump and he snapped his attention to it with wide eyes. Scarlett returned and she offered an apologetic look for making so much noise. Those doors were loud. Not much she could do about it.

She held a glass of water and cautiously brought it to him. How did she know his throat was parched? Like the damn desert.

"So, this energy project," Scarlett began, talking over Tony who had every intention of telling her to go away until he'd calmed down. Was she honestly bringing that up now? Suddenly she had interest in his work? Tony's mouth hung open stupidly and he shook his head in disbelief. "It's powered by your arc reactor, yes? Or is it just the element you discovered?" Tony still didn't respond. Instead, he stared at her, nearly forgetting to breathe. "If you want me to work with you then I need to know more details so I won't be blindsided when the press asks me difficult questions."

"I… uh… what?" Tony tried to think but his thoughts were fuzzy. He knew the answers to these questions though. Even if they were difficult to find, he knew them. He could answer them. He just had to move his lips and get his brain to cooperate. Scarlett waited patiently. She didn't push him to talk, but she looked hopeful.

"Element." Tony managed an answer. At least he sort of managed an answer. "Not like the reactor in my chest." Finally, his words made more sense and he sounded less like a fool. "The energy is created by the element and harnessed by the reactor." Tony was grateful that the world stopped spinning. He knew technology. It was a safe topic.

"That's a pretty solid foundation for the idea. You said something wasn't working with it? Tell me more about that." Scarlett made her way to him one step at a time. She leaned against the railing of the steps and held onto the glass of water. She was being cautious and careful.

"Distribution. We currently use a variety of power, nuclear, solar, wind, etcetera. It's all transferred into amps and distributed by power lines throughout cities." Tony explained though he knew she understood how energy worked. "This isn't the same. New energy, new type of power. Too strong to simply plug in and let go." He felt like a caveman with the way he was speaking. He couldn't believe the voice coming out of him was, in fact, his own. It frightened him. At least he could find words. This was solid progress from the hellscape his mind had been only moments ago.

"So, the new electrical current doesn't travel seamlessly through our existing infrastructure?" Scarlett took a careful step closer and gently took his right hand. He didn't recoil this time. In fact, he watched her in awe. She unfolded his fingers and urged the glass into his hand. When he didn't take a drink from it, she picked up his other hand and urged it around the glass too, to make certain he didn't drop it. She kept her hands briefly on his until she was sure he wouldn't let go.

His eyes went from the cup to Scarlett who was looking at his hands and to the glass.

Why was she helping him?

She was completely calm. Why was she completely calm? This wasn't a normal everyday conversation but she was cool as a cucumber. What was this woman?

"That's it." Tony's mouth was so dry it felt filled with cotton. He took a long drink from the water. It was crisp and refreshing and immediately soothed the desert in his mouth. Greedily, he drank until more than half the glass was gone. "The difference in strength is so enormous that the results during testing have been dangerous." Was she lost in thought about his energy problem or what happened to him? Tony wanted to know but he also didn't.

"Dangerous? Then the output from the reactor must be far higher than I expected." Scarlett tapped her finger against her arm in thought. Tony drank more water and Scarlett's eyes flittered to see how much he'd gone through.

"It is. Incredibly so. Working off of palladium, my reactor could keep me alive for fifty lifetimes." Tony's hands stopped shaking. Concentrating on the glass helped him find control. His breathing wasn't so difficult now that he had something to focus on other than what was wrong with him. Scarlett's reaction boggled his mind at first but now he realized how considerate and thoughtful it was. "The new element? At least a hundred times that."

"Wow." Scarlett sat next to him on the stairs, making sure to keep enough distance between them.

"Tell me about it. We lost nearly half a lab the other day. Thankfully it was in a contained testing area away from the judgmental eye of the press but it should tell you how well testing is going." Tony finished the glass of water and set it aside. He felt renewed.

But he also felt drained.

Whatever these attacks were, they left him feeling as though he'd just raced uphill for an hour. The panic didn't have its death grip anymore. Even though the image of Manhattan lingered in his mind's eye, it didn't send him into another spiral. He still wasn't sure that was what triggered it. Maybe it was the combination of being caught off guard while being out of his comfort zone for the first time in months.

Either way, Tony was embarrassed that it'd happened in front of Scarlett. Scarlett, however, didn't seem bothered. It was then that he realized she'd left her meeting to follow him. Why would she do that for him? He couldn't find any answers.

"So, Stark," began Scarlett candidly, "how long have you been having panic attacks?" She said it so casually that Tony had whiplash. Tony stared at her slack-jawed again. He didn't know what to say! He wasn't even certain that's what he'd been having! There Scarlett was, only knowing him for a few minutes, and she knew exactly what was happening to him.

No one was that smart.

For the first time in years, Tony was intimidated by someone knowing something he didn't. Or maybe it was just that she'd seen him at his most vulnerable. But those blue eyes weren't judging him. They were simply worried and he had to fight not to shiver. Here she was, a woman who barely knew him, and she was concerned. She didn't pity him, she wasn't upset, she was just worried. Even though half an hour ago he'd broken into her office and scared the hell out of her, she was being exceedingly kind.

"I, uh…" Tony's mouth was dry again but not from panic. Nerves. This was nerves. He didn't want to say out loud that it was a problem. Admitting it outside of his head made it all very real. He could very easily say it was none of her business. Tony was certain she would back off if he asked her to. They were practically strangers. It wasn't her place to get involved in his personal business. She could hold it against him, for all he knew.

But for some reason, Tony knew that Scarlett had no plans to tell anyone no matter his answer.

"You don't have to tell me." Scarlett smiled. "It's a very personal question." She looked straight ahead at the wall of the stairwell, not offended by the idea of him not responding.

"...ever since I sent that nuke through the portal above Manhattan." Tony decided after she looked away that he'd be honest. He didn't expect to want to be. And saying it was like a weight off of his shoulders. He'd been having panic attacks for months and talking them away. The Battle of New York sent him spiraling. "I know it sounds stupid. I know some people don't believe it happened. But I saw it. I lived it." Tony turned to find Scarlett had returned her attention to him.

"I went home to Stark Tower. I thought I'd be okay. I've been through worse. I'd made the choice to take that bomb knowing I would probably die." Tony continued. He couldn't stop now that he started. Somehow everything that he'd built up just poured out of him. He needed to talk. He didn't realize how much he'd needed to talk. "But I started seeing it in my sleep. Armies I couldn't fight. And in those last moments I tried to call the people I loved to tell them that I loved them and I couldn't get through. Then in my dreams I was losing them. I thought being so close to it and seeing the cleanup was causing the nightmares." Tony leaned his elbow on his knee then ran his fingers through his hair. "So, I moved. I went back to Malibu. I thought it would help."

"A change of scenery." Scarlett interjected quietly.

"Exactly!" Tony smiled but it faded quickly. She wasn't judging him. The way that Scarlett spoke, the way she listened. She understood. He didn't think anyone would understand. "It didn't help. I kept having the nightmares. I couldn't sleep. It took a toll. I solve problems, Scarlett. You understand that. You're a problem solver too. So, instead of sleeping I worked on my armor. So I could protect myself. So I could protect Pepper. So I could protect my friends. It wasn't about the world anymore. The world doesn't see what this does to you. All they see are numbers. How much damage was done. How much it'll cost to fix. How much time it'll take."

"You can't expect them to see more than that."

"I know that. I do." Tony continued. "But… I… I couldn't fix it. I can't fix it. How am I supposed to fight something I can't see or understand?" He nervously clasped his hands together and exhaled deeply. If he panicked again he wasn't sure he would forgive himself. He certainly wouldn't be able to show his face to Scarlett again. He thought about telling her how Pepper dismissed him time and again. Would she do the same? Was he the asshole? Maybe he was wrong to think that anyone should give a damn. He already felt bad enough. He wasn't trying to make it worse.

"I ignored it. It'd go away. The people close to me don't get it. Pepper, Happy, Rhodes. They don't. I think I… I pulled away without meaning to." Tony said it without thinking and winced. Had he really done that? Hadn't he tried to talk to Pepper? She'd pushed him away! Not the other way around. Or maybe it was a combination of things. "But it didn't go away. It got worse. Going outside, running Stark Industries, it all felt so unimportant. Nothing's the way it used to be. I don't know if it ever can be."

"It doesn't have to be the same." Scarlett spoke sympathetically.

"I know. This is the first time I've left Malibu since I came back. I thought I was okay. I was feeling great until I saw Manhattan behind your investor. Something snapped in my head and well, here we are." Tony stopped. His mouth was dry again from saying so much so quickly. It was the very definition of word vomit. Someone was listening to him for the first time in what felt like forever. Yes, Rhodey listened to him, but Rhodey pitied him from the moment Tony picked up the phone.

"Distraction is your ally." Scarlett broke the silence. He'd expected an apology for his suffering, not advice. "I know you think that working on your armor is a distraction, but it's not. You're fixating on the cause of your anxiety. Building it up in your head. Trying to come up with a solution to an irrational thought is equally irrational."

"You think so?" Tony furrowed his brow.

"I do. Coming here, flying through my window, talking to me. You didn't do that because of some fear. You did it in spite of it. That's a real distraction. I can't say the distractions will always work, but sometimes they help."

"That's why you brought up my energy work." Tony tried not to stare but he couldn't help it. He'd thought she was crazy for bringing up work when he was hyperventilating but it was truly brilliant. Forcing his mind away from the fixation of his panic had released him from its grips. How the hell did she know how to help him?

"Yeah. I knew if we talked about something you knew inside and out it'd probably help stop the cycle of whatever set you off." Scarlett sighed with relief.

"Brilliant."

"I've been told I'm clever now and again." Scarlett smiled then furrowed her brow. Tony watched her, waiting. "You shouldn't suffer in silence." Tony's heart stung. Was it that obvious? It had to be. She was a stranger. "If no one knows what you're going through then they can't possibly understand. People aren't mind readers. And it may sound silly in your head but it's not. Keeping it all to yourself will eat you alive. It's like ignoring a worn screw. You keep twisting and it doesn't get better. It just ruins the whole project." He searched Scarlett for more, for something she wasn't telling him. For why she understood. "You'll self-destruct."

"How do you know so much about this?" Tony was exasperated. Scarlett smiled but her discomfort was obvious.

"I know what post traumatic stress looks like, Tony."

"No, I don't…" Tony rejected it. That was for soldiers. Tony wasn't a victim of anything.

Or was he? Hadn't he experienced a significant trauma? He'd never considered it. Maybe she was right.

"You are. I'm not a medical doctor but I've been there, Stark. PTSD is different for everyone but it's just… stress following a traumatic experience. We all hit our breaking point and everyone's breaking point is different. No one's immune. Not even the genius, billionaire, playboy Tony Stark." When Scarlett didn't elaborate, Tony sat in silence. Was she right? Was this PTSD? Was this what it looked like for him? How was that possible? He'd literally been held captive in Afghanistan attached to a car battery and hadn't struggled with PTSD. Or maybe he had. Was becoming Iron Man what he'd done to cope with that? His cry for help was also his salvation.

"What I'm really curious of now is what happened to you." Tony folded his arms on his knees. "You said you've been there. So what happened to you?" Tony was surprised to see her smile. He'd expected her to freeze up and get defensive. He never would have answered if she'd just asked out of the blue. Scarlett had known how to maneuver around the difficult questions and make him comfortable enough to answer. He was waiting for the ax to drop. There was no way she really cared about what he was going through. They'd just met.

"I'd have to kill you if I told you." Scarlett was obviously not ready to talk about it either and Tony couldn't blame her. He'd let it go for now. The weight in his chest was supposed to lift, right? For a moment it felt like it'd gone but it was back and heavy in his chest. It settled down into his stomach and made it churn.

"Still funny, even on such a serious topic." Tony chuckled. Scarlett nodded. He was sure she had perfectly good reasons not to share her history. They'd just met and she was keeping big parts of her life a secret. He couldn't be trusted with those secrets. That was fair enough.

"Yeah, I make jokes in uncomfortable situations. So sue me." Scarlett stood and wiped off her palms. "Why don't we go downtown and grab a drink?" She took the empty glass and then offered Tony her other hand to help him up. Pursing his lips, Tony stared at her hand and then back at Scarlett. Her blue eyes hid secrets and he wanted to know them more than ever. But for now, he wondered mostly if she was asking him out. Was he allowed to say yes? "You still drink, right?"

"Scotch, mostly." Tony took her hand and stood. His legs were both tense and wobbly, was that possible? He was grateful for her help even though he'd been certain he didn't need it. Tony made a mental note to ask if panic attacks had more physical symptoms. He still second-guessed that was the problem. There were too many symptoms for this to be in his head. "I'm not a cheap date, just so you know." Tony followed her out of the stairwell and back into the empty hallway. He didn't think anyone but Scarlett came into this part of Refuge very often.

"I knew that when I asked." Scarlett smiled knowingly and led him back into her workshop. She set the glass down on the counter. "You have a reputation. For the record? I'm no cheap date either." Scarlett searched the room.

"I don't want to give you the wrong impression." Tony wanted to grab a drink with Scarlett. Very much so. But he also knew he shouldn't. It wasn't the responsible thing to do. How long had it been since he'd done something he wanted to do? And he wasn't trying to get in her pants, despite how much he thought about it.

"I know you're not single." Scarlett let her hair back down and shook it free. "And I'm not the nymphomaniac the internet makes me out to be."

"Well, don't start talking crazy now." Tony would be very disappointed to find out that all the rumors were untrue. He had a lovely image of her in his mind and he'd hate for that fantasy to be broken. Though he was certain that she was just as impressive in every other aspect of her life- including sex.

"I'll call it a working lunch." Scarlett sat on the table and folded her arms over her chest. "A liquid lunch, I'm hoping. At least for me. Someone broke into my office today, I'm very stressed."

"Rightfully so." Tony decided he wouldn't pretend he didn't want to go. And why should he? Scarlett was helping him and listening to him. For someone who had been threatening to have him thrown out by security only an hour ago, she sure was going to great lengths to make him comfortable. Scarlett had actually been very accommodating all things considered.

"I can't go out like this. Have to get changed."

"The press wouldn't recognize you."

"I know. I'll only be a minute."

"Hopefully back into that little Dior number you had on earlier."

"It's not Dior." Scarlett rolled her eyes and stood. "You should wait in the hall."

"If I must." Tony sighed heavily then stepped into the hall and gave her privacy. He'd expected many things upon flying to Boston that morning but never what he'd actually gotten. Refuge turned out to be worthy of its namesake.