Chapter 39: Mugi Urushi

To whom it may concern,

I am writing to inform you that my apartment, located at 5 Chome-6-3 Nishinippori, Arakawa City, Tokyo 116-0013, Japan, was completely destroyed on the night of October 28th due to a fire caused by a gas leak following the earthquake that occurred on the same day at 8:41 PM. The damages affect the entirety of the apartment.

I am sending you the fire department's report, photographs taken a few hours after the fire, as well as a detailed list of the destroyed material possessions, and the corresponding invoices.

I remain at your full disposal, as well as at the expert's so that an assessment of the damages can be made and your insurance company can proceed with the compensation.

Sincerely,

Kuroo Tetsurō

-/-

Kuroo had made a list of the items lost in the fire. It wasn't much really… He managed to save his computer and his phone. He didn't lose much really: clothes, kitchen utensils, his brand-new kotatsu... The photos of Kenma and him when they were kids, the little note his mother had slipped into the package she had sent him a few weeks ago, the half-dead begonia that Keiji and he had found on one of their dates, his notes, the hideous t-shirt that Kōtarō had given him with a rat playing the banjo, a few books...

Looking at his list, Kuroo thought he had been lucky. He hadn't come with much, he hadn't accumulated much... It wasn't that bad in the end... He was fine, Kōtarō was fine too...

His boyfriends had taken him in, of course, and he had a place to stay. He was used to spending time there, so there were already a few clothes, his toothbrush, his hairbrush... His situation wasn't so terrible after all, he had just been a bit shaken up. Right?

-/-

"Yes, Mom everything is fine! I already told you so yesterday!"

"I'm just worried about you, baby. It's very kind of Kenma to let you stay with him for now. Are you sure it's not bothering him?"

"No, Mom, don't worry."

"But he doesn't live alone, does he? He has roommates, right? Maybe it's a bother for them, you know…"

"No, don't worry."

"Do you know them well? Do you get along with them?"

Kuroo held back a chuckle: considering he was in a romantic and sexually fulfilling relationship with them, yes, he could say they got along well. Kōtarō, half-sprawled on him on the couch, didn't bother to hold back a laugh.

"Yes, I know them well, and I get along with them."

"Well… But you need to find a solution, you can't stay there indefinitely."

Kuroo met Kenma's gaze, who was sitting on the carpet in front of him.

"Don't worry, Mom, I…"

"Is Kenma there? I want to talk to him."

"Yes, he's here but…"

"Okay, wait, I'll call you on video, so I can see you and Kenma too."

"No, wait, I…"

Too late, his mother was already starting the video call. Panicked, Kuroo scrambled off the couch, accidentally kneeing his boyfriend in the head, tripped over another one, and ran down the hallway. The camera started, and he finally saw his mother's face… or rather, her mouth in extreme close-up.

"Mom, move your head away from the phone."

She complied, and he finally saw her whole face. Tetsurō couldn't help but smile, despite everything, he was glad to see her.

"I'm happy to see you. You look like you're doing well."

"See! I told you so, everything's fine."

"Well, show me Kenma now."

"Okay, okay."

Kuroo returned to the living room and sat on the carpet, keeping Kenma out of the frame so he could choose not to be on camera. He caught Kōtarō's eye on the couch, who was still rubbing his head.

"Sorry," Kuroo muttered.

Kōtarō rolled his eyes and finally got up to leave the room, giving them a bit more privacy.

"What?"

"Nothing, uh…"

Kenma leaned into the camera's view.

"Hello, Hatsuko-san."

"Kenma-kun, my boy! Nice to see you again, too bad it's under such circumstances. Thank you so much for letting Tetsurō stay with you, I'm extremely grateful."

"No problem."

"If you need anything, let me know. Oh! And give me your address so I can send you some supplies."

"Mom, there's no need to…"

"Who is it?" interrupted a second voice.

Natsume appeared in the camera'.

"Your brother and Kenma-kun. He's going to host him for a while."

His sister looked at the camera again. She gave a knowing smile.

"Oh… I see. How generous."

Tetsurō frowned, pretending not to understand what she was implying.

She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. She stopped when their mother turned her head towards her:

"Will you help me do some shopping to send to your brother?"

Natsume pouted.

"No, it's boring."

"Natsu!"

"Okay, bye losers."

"Oh… sorry for her attitude, Kenma-kun."

"It's fine," reassured the blond, more amused than offended by the teenager's behavior.

"Well, all good then. Tetsu, I'll send everything quickly. Take care of yourselves, boys. If you need anything, I'm here."

"Okay, Mom, talk to you later."

"Kisses!"

"Bye, Mom."

He hung up and let out a long sigh.

A few seconds later, his phone rang again. This time, it was a message from his younger sister in their group chat:

"And they were roommates."

Kuroo rolled his eyes. Poor girl, she thought she was teasing him! He wasn't going to blush over something so trivial.

He did blush stupidly nonetheless.

"Ji," Kenma finally called.

"Hmm?"

"Hmm… we talked about it with Kōtarō and Keiji, but you know… um, you can, well if you want…"

Kuroo frowned.

"What?"

"Stay here indefinitely. Well, if you want to."

Kuroo felt a surge of conflicting emotions. Strangely, he hadn't really thought about it. He hadn't considered the possibility that his situation could be permanent… Heck, he wasn't even sure he had fully grasped his situation yet… He thought hearing this would simply fill him with joy, but the feelings inside him were far more complex: joy, yes, but also fear, anxiety, and a whirlwind of emotions he couldn't yet name. He snapped out of his spiral when he felt Kenma take his hand. He looked up: the blond was smiling at him.

"Oh… um. I…"

"You don't have to answer now… And of course, you don't have to say yes. It's a big step, I understand that… But know that if you want to, you can. Okay?"

"Okay…"

Kenma nodded. He leaned in to kiss him and then stood up.

"I'm going to work for a bit."

"Okay, see you later."

"See you later."

And he left. Kuroo found himself alone in the living room, still a bit stunned by what had just happened. He looked down at his phone again:

"And they were roommates."

-/-

Oikawa Tōru had two passions in life: astrobiology and fashion. As a child, he dreamed of becoming the first intergalactic fashion designer.

Over time, he realized he would never reconcile his two passions, but that didn't mean he had completely given up either! He chose biology, yes, but at least he was the most stylish nerd of all, and that alone, was very precious to him.

"Look at that," he thought, having noticed someone entering the lecture hall wearing a hideous two-tone shirt in purple and candy pink with fluorescent yellow stripes. Hideous. The abomination of a shirt was paired with canary-yellow trousers, Oikawa swore he'd never seen anything so horrible.

He couldn't help but make a face of disgust and disdain. He wondered who this individual could possibly be associated with, dressed like that: no one would want to be seen in the presence of such an eyesore.

The 'eyesore' in question was coming towards him.

He squinted: he had forgotten his contact lenses and wouldn't put on his glasses until the lecture started, so he couldn't quite make out the face of this fashion heretic. The strange bird was getting closer and closer; it was clear he was coming straight towards him now: the audacity! He certainly didn't want this individual to sit near him, no way he… Oh…

He finally recognized the person in question:

"Kuroo?"

"Yo," greeted his friend before sitting down next to him.

Oikawa watched him unpack his things, deeply dismayed.

"Everything's okay?" his friend finally asked, noticing the look on his face.

"Okay? You're asking if I'm okay, what the hell are you wearing?"

The brunet looked down at the offending attire.

"Oh, these are Kōtarō's clothes, he's the closest to my size. I don't have many clothes left, so…"

"Just because he's the closest in size doesn't mean you… wait, what do you mean, you don't have many clothes left?"

"Oh… my apartment burned down this weekend, so I don't have many clothes left and no apartment."

Oikawa stared at him, stunned.

"What? Your apartment burned down?"

"Yeah, after Saturday's earthquake, the apartment below mine exploded because of a gas leak."

"It exploded ?! What! Kuroo, you… what?! Why didn't you tell us anything?"

"Oh… I forgot."

"You forgot to tell us your building exploded?!"

"Not the whole building, just the apartment below mine, the rest burned down."

"Just brurn d… Kuroo!"

Oikawa looked at his friend from head to toe:

"Are you okay? You didn't get hurt?"

"Yeah, I'm fine… Kōtarō was with me, we managed to get out in time."

He indeed didn't seem to have any physical injuries, but he must have taken a serious hit on the head!

"Don't worry, I'm fine…"

"But… Kuroo!"

"I didn't want to worry you guys. And with the insurance claim and everything, I kind of forgot…"

Oikawa's eyes softened.

"I understand, but you could have told us… Are you okay? Do you need anything? Tell me if you need anything…"

"Don't worry… I'm at Kenma's for now."

Oikawa fell silent, though he kept a concerned eye on him.

"Hi," greeted Chris, putting his things next to Kuroo's.

His two friends turned to look at him, and the blond quickly realized something was wrong.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, everything's fine…" started Tetsurō.

"Kuroo's apartment burned down this weekend and he didn't tell us!"

"What?"

"Oikawa…"

Chris looked at him, deeply shocked.

"Don't worry Chris, I'm fine."

"I'm a little worried…"

"No, I… it's fine… Oikawa, what are you doing?" asked the brunet when he noticed that his friend was frantically typing on his phone.

"I'm letting the group know, if you won't do it, someone has to…"

"No, wait!" intervened Kuroo, trying to take his phone away.

Oikawa still managed to avoid him.

"Done," he declared, placing his phone back on the table. "After class, you're coming with me, I can't let you walk around like that!"

Kuroo quickly realized he had no say in the matter... The class was about to start anyway...

His phone kept vibrating throughout the next two hours. Great, now the entire CATO gang was yelling at him, exactly what he had hoped to avoid. After a while, he decided to take a look.

He smiled, noticing that everyone had sent warm messages of support… after promising to give him a proper scolding once they saw him again.

-/-

Tetsurō stepped out of the fitting room and was instantly met with four pairs of eyes. He sighed:

"Someone's going to have to explain to me why you all decided to play fashion critics today..."

Oikawa raised an eyebrow and lowered his glasses.

"Excuse me? You would have preferred I let you walk around dressed like that?"

"Not you, Oikawa... But I do wonder what the rest of you are doing here."

Sugawara looked genuinely surprised:

"I just work here..."

"Yeah, and I'm assisting. You owe me for not even telling us!" Yamaguchi pleaded.

"I'm here to make fun of you," Tsukishima replied.

At least that was honest...

"Turn around," Oikawa ordered.

Kuroo sighed but complied. His jury scrutinized him, collectively satisfied with the outfit.

"Next," Oikawa commanded.

Tetsurō returned to the fitting room to try on the next outfit.

"Did you manage to get the insurance to work?" Sugawara asked from the other side of the curtain.

"Yeah... but to be clear, I didn't have much to begin with. I managed to save my computer and my phone... The rest wasn't worth much..."

He stepped out again, and his little group seemed pleasantly surprised by the outfit.

"This one is nice, killing ass, love it," Yamaguchi complimented him. "Are you staying at Kenma's?"

"Thanks. Yeah, I'm staying with them for now."

"Are you planning to get another apartment?" Sugawara asked.

As he was about to return to the fitting room, Kuroo gave up. He sighed and replied:

"Honestly, I don't know... I need to talk it over with them but..."

"But?"

"Kenma offered me to stay... indefinitely."

The news left the little group momentarily stunned.

"Oh really? That's great!" Yamaguchi commented.

Kuroo forced a smile.

"You don't look thrilled," Sugawara noted.

"No, it's not that... I don't know but..."

Kuroo gave up on returning to the fitting room and turned around. He sat down on the floor.

"I don't know..."

"Oh... Is everything okay between you guys?" Sugawara asked.

"Yes, everything's fine! Perfectly fine!"

"You're not used to living with people, is that it?" Yamaguchi tried to guess.

"No... it's just... I don't know... It feels a bit rushed, right? Maybe it's going too fast... We've only been together for a few months..."

"And? There aren't really any rules. If you all want it, what's the problem?"

"Plus, it saves you rent."

A pertinent remark by Tsukishima... Indeed, at least three-quarters of his scholarship would no longer be needed for rent.

"Yeah... I don't know... Maybe it's too fast... I thought we'd be further along when this might potentially happen..."

"Honestly, you've already shared a cycle with them. That's a much more significant step, living together isn't that monumental, right?" Yamaguchi observed. The rest of the group seemed to agree with him.

"Exactly... It's a lot all at once, right?"

"...No. But it's up to you to decide..."

"No, but... And then... It didn't happen... consensually. I mean, it just sort of fell on me without me seeing it coming... I don't want them to... I don't want them to agree to this because they think they have to... Maybe it's not the right time..."

"Hmm, I see what you mean..."

"See, I…"

"But... I don't know if I'd go as far as to say it's not the right time... Sometimes life pushes you, and... it's not necessarily a bad thing... Honestly, Tsukki and I started living together because I got kicked out of my clan and would have ended up on the street otherwise, and it's fine, I still think it was a good decision and I regret nothing."

Tsukishima gave a tender smile and took his mate's hand in his.

"Don't say that Tadashi, I wouldn't have let you end up on the street," Sugawara intervened.

"You weren't far off yourself, I'd never have let you bear that burden and..."

"You're never a burden to me, Tadashi, and..."

"It doesn't matter, that's not the point," Yamaguchi cut him off. "What I mean is... sometimes things happen for a reason and that's not a bad thing either..."

"What do you mean? My apartment had to catch fire for me to live with my boyfriends?" Kuroo remarked sarcastically.

"No... not like that... But... You sometimes have to take what comes."

"Hmm... When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, all that shit?"

"Kind of yes… And if you're not ready, I don't see what stops you from taking your time," Oikawa interjected. "You can always get another apartment and see how things develop later... You can choose to go at your own pace, right?"

"Hmm... Yeah..."

"Well, take the time to think it over and trust yourself. Now, go back in, we still have work to do!"

Kuroo nodded and returned to the fitting room.

Sure, he could go at his own pace... but he also didn't know what tempo to set: allegro, moderato, andante? He didn't want the dance he had started to overtake him without him learning the right steps first.

-/-

Kuroo came back home with a properly refreshed wardrobe... as well as a significant hole in his budget. More importantly, he came back with a slew of doubts, a heavy burden weighing on him that he couldn't shake off.

The rest of the week went by without him taking the time to reflect further. He let the days pass through him without offering any resistance. His boyfriends hadn't brought up the subject either, probably waiting for him to come to them once he had made a decision… which he avoided doing. In short, he was stuck in inertia.

Bokuto had summoned him this Saturday afternoon for a bit of manual activity: repairing the tea set he had shattered during his last, rather justified, case of seismophobia.

They were seated at the dining table, surrounded by all the ceramic shards, an odd disastrous puzzle they had decided to solve. Kōtarō was busy polishing one of the fragments, while Tetsurō tried to mimic his movements to handle his own little pile of broken ceramic.

"Um... How long is this supposed to take?" the brunet finally asked.

Kōtarō looked up.

"Not too long, don't over-polish it, just enough to glue the pieces back without too much trouble."

"No, I mean the whole repair?"

"Oh..."

His boyfriend leaned back in his chair, calculating the time they would need to finish this task.

"Um... between twenty days and a month, I'd say..."

Kuroo widened his eyes.

"Really?"

"Hmm... yeah... It takes about a week for the mugi urushi to dry completely... Then we have to apply the sugi urushi... wait for it to dry... um... paint with black... then red, and finally add the gold powder... so yeah, a month I'd say..."

"That's super long!"

Kōtarō caught his gaze again.

"A bit, yeah..."

He smiled.

"But healing takes time..."

Tetsurō frowned: now he had to heal inanimate objects ?!

Kōtarō simply nodded. He pulled a small glass square from a little box and placed it in front of him.

"My grandmother told me when I was younger that kintsugi is a bit like a journey... It's the beginning of a new cycle, a new life."

Bokuto carefully sprinkled a few grams of flour on the glass square, then, in a detached and controlled gesture, formed a few drops of water around it with a pipette. He then took a white tube from the small black box next to him and squeezed out a thick brown paste.

"What is that?" Tetsurō asked, watching each of his boyfriend's movements attentively.

"Urushi sap. We use it to make the 'Mugi Urushi' which will glue the pieces back together."

"Oh... okay..."

Tetsurō watched him start mixing everything with a wooden spatula. Each of his movements was slow, calculated, and precise, which fascinated the brunet. It was strange to see Kōtarō like this, in such a calm and peaceful trance... Tetsurō didn't expect him to be able to pull that off. To his defense, he had seen him just a few hours earlier attempting to pour rice into a jar: half of the rice ended up on the floor.

"It takes ten years from the planting of this tree to the harvest… About 200 grams can be harvested..."

"Not very economical," remarked the brunet.

Bokuto let out a chuckle.

"Maybe..."

The paste had now become brown and elastic. He handed Tetsurō a wooden spatula, which he took without really knowing what he was supposed to do with it. Kōtarō took a portion of the brown paste and applied it to the broken parts of the ceramic. The brunet watched him attentively, before imitating his movements.

"Sometimes it takes time..."

Tetsurō looked up but Kōtarō's eyes remained on his work, continuing to apply the mugi urushi on each break.

"Kintsugi is about repairing objects by highlighting their scars, acknowledging the time that has passed, and the impact it has had on us, on the objects..."

Kōtarō put down the spatula and picked up the shards, placing each one back in its original position so the cup could regain its original shape.

"How these cracks have changed the object... There's no point trying to erase what has already happened..."

He cut a few pieces of marking tape and placed them across the cracks.

"What matters is what we do with it afterwards. So yes, it takes a bit of time..."

Kōtarō moved to sit beside him. He guided his hands, and Tetsurō felt all the pieces fitting back together, finding their original place.

"It takes time for all the pieces to come together, for the cracks to close... It takes time to identify and recognise the marks made, to remember them so that we can improve them as much as possible".

Kuroo turned and finally caught his boyfriend's gaze. He smiled, and Tetsurō felt his heart lighten. They stayed like that for a long time. Finally, Tetsurō leaned in to kiss him, Kōtarō closed his eyes and welcomed his lips.

They eventually parted and Kōtarō returned to his original place to retrieve the freshly repaired cup. Earlier, they had prepared a box, lined the bottom with paper, and placed a damp towel around the edges; Bokuto placed the cup inside and invited the brunet to do the same.

"It needs a temperature between 20 and 30 degrees Celsius and high humidity for the paste to dry properly," he explained before closing the box. "Now we wait."

Tetsurō looked at the box, then at his boyfriend. The storm inside him had quieted... Kōtarō had strangely found the right words when he didn't even realise that was what he needed to hear all along.

Everything that had happened recently: Keiji's overdose, the command, Kenma's bad episode, the torpor, his apartment... All of it had affected him more than he dared to admit, none of it was trivial. So yes, maybe he had the right, even the duty, to take some time, to let everything calm down, for the pieces of himself, the little fragments, to find their original places. For him to regain his unity before moving forward.

"Come on, we need to take care of the teapot before the paste dries."

-/-

"Here you have a small kitchen with an oven, you don't see that everywhere, I can tell you that! On your right, the bathroom, the water thermostat is just at the entrance, and the control panel for the ofuro is right here".

Tetsurō vaguely nodded, sweeping his gaze across the room. The real estate agent kept talking, but he was already tuning out his words.

Earlier this week, he had received a phone call from his mother. Full of good intentions, she had started looking for apartments for him. Not wanting her efforts to go to waste, and still wanting to give it a try, Kuroo had contacted the agencies to arrange a few visits. One of the agencies had agreed to start the visits that very afternoon. He had gone directly after his classes. He hadn't told anyone. No need to bother anyone, right?

This was already his third visit. The apartments on offer were relatively close to each other, uni was just around the corner, in a much nicer neighborhood than his old one. It was even quite close to the CATO! The apartments were small, sure, but not much smaller than his previous place, and the standard was much higher for a reasonable price: new, clean, with hot water… Perfect in every way.

However, none of them completely thrilled the brunet. Throughout his visits, a heaviness had settled within him, a deep-rooted melancholia. He was pulled from his reflections when the real estate agent's phone rang.

"Oh, I'm really sorry, I have to take this call. Feel free to look around, I'll be back shortly."

He bowed and left the apartment, leaving Kuroo alone.

He had always found solitude pleasant, relaxing even. So why did it feel so suffocating today? He returned to the main room, his footsteps echoing around. He sat on the floor, letting his gaze drift over the small place, over and over.

"It's not too bad," he thought, still trying to convince himself.

"No," his mind screamed in response.

He sighed.

Without realizing it, he had gotten used to it—to not being alone. He had gotten used to them.

Waking up with them every morning. Going for a run with Kōtarō. Meeting Kenma in the evening to pick up Keiji from the Fukuro. Kenma grumbling about the slow internet, Keiji reading in the living room, singing horribly off-key with Kōtarō while cooking…

It had grown on him over time. He was profoundly happy to live with them.

He had always thought of himself as a lone wolf. Turns out, he needed his pack too.

He thought that this fear that had been with him for some time was born of the abruptness of his situation.

He thought he was just afraid of rushing things, of missing the bit, of losing the rhythm. He was afraid that living with them would change their dynamic, or so he thought. But their dynamic had already changed: their bonds were stronger, deeper.

Somewhere deep inside he knew it. He knew that he liked the idea of staying with them.

No.

He was sure of it, from the beginning, he knew it: he wanted to stay at their side. It didn't matter that it had only been a few months, he didn't care. He was sure now, and he didn't doubt for a second that it was the right decision.

So, where did this fear come from?

His phone vibrated and he looked down. It was a text from his mother.

"So, how are the visits going?"

Tetsurō felt his heart tighten.

"How am I going to tell them?"

Kuroo widened his eyes, surprised that this was the first thought that came to him.

Oh...

What if he wasn't afraid of making the wrong decision? What if he was actually scared of making the right one? He knew that if he agreed to live with his boyfriends, there would be no turning back.

He wasn't scared of losing everything.

No.

Living with them would mean that he would not be able to hide anymore, that was what he was afraid of. He couldn't really hide anymore... Of course, he could still keep silent. After all, there was nothing suspicious about living with three grown men, especially in a city as densely populated as Tokyo, where people lived on top of each other. He he wouldn't be able to lie forever.

He had long understood that, despise coming out to them years ago, his parents, while not rejecting him, had tacitly decided never to bring up the subject again. Kuroo had come to terms with it, but it was still painful. Painful because he couldn't share with them what he was experiencing, what he was going through, whether it made him happy or not, as if he was living a secret life that had to remain untold.

He was aware that he was in a privileged environment, in the sense that he had surrounded himself with people who understood him, who supported him, who loved him. It wasn't the case for everyone, he was aware of that.

The return to reality was brutal...

He knew that most people wouldn't understand, but he had made peace with it years ago...

What he hadn't prepared for, what no one could really prepare for, was the rejection of his family.

Would his parents understand?

Probably not.

Would he have to lie to them for years and years?

Would they eventually find out?

And if they did, would it change the way they saw him, the way they loved him?

He thought he had gotten rid of these questions; now they were resurfacing.

Back to square one.

Tetsurō felt tears welling up in his eyes.

And his sisters... They were open-minded, and had fully supported him until now, but would they continue to do so if they knew? If it completely changed the way they saw him?

He didn't want to lose them. He didn't want to have to choose between his family and his lovers...

He couldn't just wait; time wouldn't fix anything. Maybe he was foolishly in love, but he wasn't ready to part with his boyfriends, he wanted to continue his journey with them as far as he could. He would never fit into the neat little boxes that his parents, his grandparents, and everyone would have liked. He already knew that, nothing new, but... it had never seemed so real to him before...

He realized it very young, long before he was ready to face it. He had to mourn all the idyllic love stories he had been fed since childhood, stories that promised a future he would never have. In their place, a deeply defeatist and pessimistic nature had spawned. He remembered when he had his first boyfriend in high school; even though he was madly in love and truly happy, there was always a little voice in his head whispering, "It won't last anyway.

He knew that eventually he would be abandoned, that eventually, the other person would come back to reality, would want to fit into the mold, would want to live in peace. In lies, yes, but peacefully.

It unfolded just as he expected: he got dumped, exactly for that reason. If it was going to end anyway, there was no need to talk about it, no need to argue, no need to introduce anyone to his family, and no need to risk losing them.

And today?

Today, the voice had fallen silent. He didn't need to listen to it anymore; he no longer feared being abandoned. Not by them.

He knew what this silence meant.

Tetsurō straightened up, grabbed his things, and left the apartment. He passed by the real estate agent, still on the phone. He quickly greeted him without giving any further explanations and hurried down the stairs. Finally, he passed through the entrance door, feeling the fresh wind whip his face. He set off, trying to distance himself as quickly as possible.

His mind was looping, unable to find any solutions.

It finally dawned on him with a sense of fatalism: he didn't have a choice, and he never truly did. The only choice he had was between living miserably or not, and he had chosen not to live miserably. No matter the cost, he would remain with them, even if it meant being disowned by his family.

In the end, he had only delayed the final verdict.

His legs refused to carry him any further. He stopped in the middle of the street, surrounded by the crowd, watching the world go by around him. He managed to sit down on the edge of a wall. He took out his phone and stared at the last message his mother had sent him.

He replied, "Sorry, Mom."

Sorry, but I've made up my mind.

Tetsurō burst into tears.

-/-

Tetsurō looked down at his phone: 6:45 PM. No one was home yet; Kenma had probably already left to meet Keiji at the Fukuro and Kōtarō was probably still at the library working on his group project.

Perfect, that gave him some time to collect himself. He grimaced when he saw his reflection on the phone screen: he had cried so much, his eyes were swollen and his face irritated. Yes, he didn't need anyone to see him like this; he wasn't really in the mood to talk right now.

When he looked up, he noticed two figures standing in front of the gate of the house. He squinted, trying to determine who they might be. He gasped as he recognized them: it was Yūma Maeda and Naruhito Nakayama, Kōtarō's parents.

He froze. Damn it! What were they doing here?

He could just... turn around, right? He wasn't really in the mood and...

Who was he kidding, of course he couldn't.

"I told you we should call them Yūma; they're not here," said Nakayama.

"I know my dandelion, but it wouldn't have been a surprise if we'd called beforehand, right? It's okay, we can come back another time," replied her mate.

Kuroo sighed.

He wiped his eyes with his sleeve and stepped forward.

"Nakayama-san, Yūma-san."

The two turned around. A sunny smile spread across Yūma's lips when she recognized him.

"Oh, Tetsurō-kun, there you are!"

Nakayama-san didn't seem particularly thrilled to run into him. Nevertheless, he remained polite and greeted him with a bow. Kuroo did the same before speaking again.

"Um... I'm sorry, Kōtarō isn't here... No one's here yet, actually..."

"Oh... That's alright, you're here," Yūma replied.

Nakayama-san nodded.

"Oh, uh..."

Silence hung in the air for several seconds.

"Do you still want to... come in?"

"With pleasure, Tetsurō-kun."

He nodded adwardly and walked past them to unlock the gate. No words were exchanged until they were finally inside.

"Kenma and Keiji shouldn't be too long, but I'm not sure when Kōtarō will be back. I'll send him a message, but... well, that's it," he said.

"It's alright. We also wanted to see you," Yūma replied.

Tetsurō blinked, surprised.

"Me?"

"Yes. Kōtarō explained to us what happened to you. We wanted to make sure everything was okay."

He was speechless, moved by their kindness.

"Oh, yes, I'm... I'm alright," he said to his "parents-in-law," his eyes swollen with tears. Very convincing, Tetsu! He stood there, saying nothing.

"We brought you some clothes if you need them. They belonged to our elders, but they're still in very good shape," Kōtarō's mom said, sliding the large shopping bag off her shoulder and handing it to him.

He took it, unable to respond, overwhelmed. He glanced inside the bag; a bunch of clothes had been neatly folded. No way! They shouldn't have done this while he was still so emotional ! Don't cry, Tetsu, don't cry! He felt tears welling up in his eyes, but he held them back.

"Thank you very much," he finally said, bowing.

Maeda-san smiled at him. She handed him a second bag.

"We also brought you some groceries. There's some fresh stuff; you should put it in the fridge soon," she indicated.

Kuroo nodded, took the bag, and headed towards the kitchen. He turned back before reaching his destination, remembering that he still had to play host and make a good impression.

"Would you like some tea?"

"With pleasure."

He nodded and went off again. He put the water on to boil and started unpacking the groceries. He was touched to see that most of the items had been bought for four people. It was a small gesture, but he felt recognized and included. This indicated that he had been fully accepted, and it moved him.

Damn it! Now he had tears in his eyes again! Damn it, Tetsu, stop! Where's toxic masculinity when you need it? Fuck!

He regained composure when the kettled whistled. He prepared some green tea and three cups, which he placed on a tray and carried to the main room.

He stopped: Nakayama-san and Yūma-san were standing in front of the buffet under the window in the living room, where there were many picture frames. Yūma had her arm around her mate, and they were talking in low voices. Nakayama-san turned to her and gave her a tender smile. He planted a kiss on her temple before turning his eyes back to the photo.

How long had they been together? At least twenty-five years, right? They still looked in love. Tetsurō smiled, touched and at peace.

He finally looked away, walked over to the table and set the tray down, trying to clink the china to get his guests' attention without having to call them out.

It was effective; upon hearing it, they separated and came towards him. As Kuroo busied himself with setting the cup on the table, Nakayama noticed the cardboard box at the end of the table and walked over to it. He opened the flaps of the box and took out one of the cups that Kōtarō and he had repaired. He turned it over, examining it closely.

"Oh, um... Kōtarō is teaching me Kintsugi at the moment," he explained, more to fill the silence than anything else.

Nakayama-san glanced at him before looking away again. He nodded and finally said, "It's a beautiful piece."

Maeda-san turned her eyes to her mate.

"Wow, I didn't know he could do that. Did you teach him?"

Nakayama shook his head.

"No, my mother did."

"Oh."

Nakayama placed the object back, carefully closed the box, and came to sit next to his wife.

Kuroo served them, trying to be as delicate as he was physically capable of, which wasn't much, but still presentable.

Yūma started the conversation, obviously trying to calm him down. It worked, and Tetsurō finally relaxed. It didn't last long, though, and he tensed up again when Nakayama-san spoke:

"Kōtarō told us that you spent their cycle with them."

Tetsurō couldn't quite tell what Nakayama-san was really thinking from his tone. He didn't know how to respond, not feeling quite comfortable discussing the subject with his in-laws, especially with Nakayama-san.

"Oh, um, yes," he said.

"I didn't expect it to happen so quickly," Nakayama-san said.

What was that supposed to mean exactly?!

"Me neither," he replied, surprising his interlocutors.

"But, uh, in a good way," the brunet tried to justify.

"Good."

Yūma turned her gaze towards her mate, insisting. This visibly upset Nakayama-san, who tensed noticeably.

"Kuroo-san."

The soberness of his tone surprised Kuroo, who almost jumped.

"Yes?"

He tensed.

"I apologize for my words during our first encounter; they were uncalled for. "

Kuroo raised an eyebrow. Had Kōtarō talked to him about it or had he realized it himself? Either way, he nodded vaguely.

"I have to say it bothered me a bit at first, but I don't think it was unreasonable."

His remark surprised his interlocutors.

"I thought about it and I realized that yeah... I couldn't bring the same thing to the table, that's just the reality of it, I guess... But it allowed me to see what I could do on my level. Um, well, that's it. Thank you."

He bowed.

His intervention seemed to have deeply surprised Nakayama-san, positively he hoped... Yūma smiled at him.

"I think it's very mature of you."

Tetsurō didn't know what to say.

"I am glad you're by my son's side."

Phew, stop! Not now, when he was so emotional! Don't cry, Tetsu, don't cry!

Why were these people, whom he did not know so well, whom he had seen only a few hours before, so kind to him?

He let out a smile and nodded, not quite sure what else to say.

"I understand you moved in here after the incident," Maeda-san began.

"Yes."

"Oh, and what would you like to do? Find another apartment? We have an acquaintance who works in that field" she turned to her mate, " Yumiko-san, right?"

Kuroo tensed, but he tried to keep up appearances.

"Naru, do you have her number? Oh, you'll see, she's very good and..."

Her gaze landed on Kuroo.

"Oh..."

Kuroo tried to remain as neutral as possible, but he was already caught.

A smile spread across Yūma's lips.

"That's not what you want, is it?" she murmured.

Her gaze met his. Tetsurō felt his throat tighten. He looked away and nodded.

"I think so."

His eyes welled up with tears. He shook his head to try to regain his composure.

He leaned in to apologize.

"I'm sorry, I... I'm a bit... um..."

He didn't bother to finish his sentence.

The two exchanged a look.

"Oh, it's normal to feel a little overwhelmed, it's a big change, but I'm sure everything will be fine."

Kuroo glanced at them. He hesitated.

Well, now that he was here, what could go wrong really?

"Yes, maybe but... I have confidence in us, it's just that..."

Thoughts started to jumble in his head.

"Um... My parents aren't really aware of... my situation. I'm not exactly from the same world, I'm not sure if they would understand... I don't plan on telling them anytime soon, but... But I realized that... eventually it will happen... I'm just afraid of... their reaction and... losing them".

He suddenly felt so small. So fragile and tiny in front of the two of them.

"Oh... Tetsurō-kun... I'm really sorry, it must not be easy to live with. I don't know your parents, but I know one thing: if they love you, they will eventually understand, even if it may take some time. Believe me, even if you think you don't come from the same world, I can understand what you're feeling."

She turned her gaze towards her mate. The latter looked at her with infinite tenderness. Kuroo didn't know what they had been through together, but he knew that indeed, they understood.

She met his gaze again.

"And even if that's not the case, know that you will always be one of ours now."

Oh... Here came the final blow!

Tetsurō's vision became blurry, clouded with tears.

Luckily for him and his dignity, the door opened, and Kenma and Keiji appeared.

"I'll make some more tea," Kuroo said, getting up to disappear into the kitchen.

"Oh, Maeda-san, Nakayama-san," Akaashi greeted upon noticing his in-laws.

"Keiji-kun, Kenma-kun, nice to see you," Yūma said.

Kuroo heard her steps echoing on the parquet as they approached them.

"Kōtarō, move, your parents are here," Kenma shouted from the staircase.

Tetsurō chuckled as he heard Kōtarō stomping up the stairs like an overweight elephant.

"Oh, 'to-san, 'ka-san, what are you doing here?"

"We just came to say hello, baby."

Kōtarō let their conversation become nothing more than distant sounds. He took a deep breath.

He smiled. The fear was still within him, but it was now wrapped up in a soft, soothing blanket.

He snapped back to reality upon hearing the kettle.

He made a new teapot and joined everyone.

Kōtarō's parents stayed for another hour.

When they left, Tetsurō joined his boyfriend to see them off at the gate.

"Oh, and 'ka-san, can you tell Daddy to resend me that guy's link?"

"That guy's link?"

"He'll know, just tell him."

"Got it, see you later, my dear. Tetsurō-kun, it was a pleasure to see you again."

Kuroo smiled at her and nodded.

"Likewise."

"Good. Naru, I'll go get the car, I'll come pick you up."

His mate nodded, and Maeda-san walked away, waving enthusiastically.

Kōtarō continued to talk with his father, childishly grumbling when the latter gave him a bunch of recommendations to maintain a good lifestyle.

The car finally arrived.

"It was nice to meet you again, Nakayama-san," Tetsurō greeted politely as he bowed.

"Naruhito."

Kuroo looked up, startled.

"Sorry?"

Had he misheard him?

"You can call me Naruhito."

Though deeply shocked, Kuroo bowed again.

"Okay... Naruhito-san."

He just nodded.

He bid them farewell and finally turned on his heels.

Kōtarō also seemed deeply shocked by what he had just witnessed.

"Damn, what did you say to him, he never... are you crying?"

"No...," Kuroo lied with tears in his eyes.

Gosh, what an exhausting day it had been.

-/-

Tetsurō looked up from his phone.

The timing was perfect: all four of them were in the living room, each one minding his own business as they sat together in peaceful silence.

If Kuroo wanted to talk to them, he had to take the chance now. He had already waited for two days, he couldn't delay the conversation any longer.

He also hadn't replied to his mother since his cryptic melodramatic text... Not ideal, sure, but he figured he'd find a way to make it look trivial, as he didn't want to raise any suspicion.

He would deal with that later.

As he was about to speak, Kōtarō got up from the couch yawning and headed to the kitchen.

Of course. Just when he'd finally summoned the courage to talk to them, they were scattering!

Hope rose again when Kōtarō came back from the kitchen and sat behind Kuroo to hug him.

Even better! Come on, Tetsu, be brave.

"Hmm," he began.

This caught the attention of Kenma and Keiji, who looked in his direction.

"I... Kōtarō, what are you doing?"

The latter began to sniff loudly and finally sneezed like a tiny poodle.

"It's your sweater, it smells like Nao's...

He sneezed again...

"Your parents said he hasn't worn it in a long time, and I rewashed it, how can it smell like your brother?"

"I have no idea."

"Well... um, I wanted to talk to you guys about something. Babe, what are you doing?"

Kōtarō had started rubbing his head against Tetsurō's back. Tetsurō wasn't fooled; he knew exactly what his boyfriend was trying to do: he wanted to mark his clothes to replace the smell of his brother with his own. However, Tetsurō wasn't a fan of this territorial marking technique, especially since he did not consider himself a "territory" to be marked.

"Nothing, I just wanted to..."

"I don't care, stop that," he cut him off.

"But I want to give you a hug, I..."

"If you want to hug, just hug, but I'm not a carpet, don't do that!"

"What does that have to do with the carpet?"

"I'm not a piece of furniture, stop! And it smells like laundry!"

"No babe, I swear! I..."

He was interrupted by a growl from Kenma. Sheepishly, Kōtarō finally fell silent. He stopped his rubbing and simply rested his head on his shoulder.

"You wanted to tell us something?" Keiji finally intervened.

"Yes," he tapped on Kōtarō's hand, which had begun rubbing his wrist against his side, "I...," he took a deep breath, "I went to visit some apartments last Wednesday."

The announcement took everyone by surprise.

"Oh... And... What did you think?" Keiji ventured to ask.

His gaze shifted from Keiji to Kenma, Kōtarō tightened his embrace.

"I... um... it felt weird, to be honest."

"Weird?"

He nodded, before averting his eyes.

"Yes... I think I've gotten used to... living here. I felt... lonely. And..."

His gaze found the blond's.

"Kenma, about what you told me before, I... I think I want to stay here... indefinitely. Well... if you all agree of course."

Silence stretched between them.

"Well, maybe it'll be a bit cramped, but... it's up to you. I... well, I think that..."

Kuroo trailed off. Kenma was smiling at him.

He stood up, and Tetsurō's eyes followed him, unsure of what to expect. Kenma crouched in front of him, his hands gently cradling his face. Their eyes met.

"Stay," Kenma murmured.

Then he leaned in to kiss him. Kuroo smiled into the kiss. Kōtarō tightened his grip around him, chirping, also apparently delighted with his decision. Tetsurō met Keiji's gaze.

Keiji smiled and straighted up. Kenma moved aside to make room for him, and Keiji came to sit in front of him. Keiji pressed his forehead against Kuroo's, and he murmured:

"Of course I agree..."

He hugged him. Kenma did the same.

There, in the arms of his lovers, Tetsurō knew that he had made the right decision.

No matter what the future held for him, he was sure that he had chosen the right path.

"Your sweater kinda smells like Nao," Kenma commented.

"Ah, see, I told you!"

"Okay okay, enough, I'll wash it again! But stop doing that!"

That's what he had chosen to get himself into.

Once their routine was back on track, Tetsurō took out his phone and opened the conversation with his mother. She had been worried about his response, and he hadn't taken the time to reassure her.

"Don't worry," he typed. "I've already found my home."

Their home.

-end of the chapter-

Next chapter: "Under water"

"Hey."

Tetsurō looked up from his biochemistry book and turned his eyes to Kōtarō. The latter was barricaded behind a mountain of open books and scribbled notes. He gave him a tired smile.

They had begun studying together in the middle of the afternoon.

Night had fallen hours ago. Keiji had fallen asleep on his books.

"Hm?" was all Kuroo could answer.

"Happy birthday."