Answers to reviews:
prototype1290: What I meant is that they are made from left-over angelic weapons. So he's wielding a pair of the most dangerous weapons in Hell, just like Carmilla Carmine with her metal shoes.
dragosdumitru27: This is not a harem story. It's just OC x Loona x Verosika. As for how Fenrir survived? He hid. He was in the Hellhound fights before he managed to escape, Lute has nothing to do with this, so don't ask for her to be involved in the pairing because it ain't happening.
1jesus: Thanks.
Wolf Mike: Thanks.
Gamelover41592: Thank you.
Perseus12: Thanks.
Disclaimer: I do not own Hazbin Hotel or Helluva Boss. I only own the OC Fenrir Morningstar.
Well, hello there, you wayward Sinner! A video recording of Alastor talking to a Sinner sadistically stabbing another Sinner who stopped and looked up in confusion.
Do you like blood, violence, and depravity of a sexual nature?
Of course you do, that's why you're in Hell!
But what would you say if I told you there was a place to stay that had none of that?
Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, a misguided path to redemption! Founded five days ago by Lucifer's delusional daughter, Charlotte Morningstar!
A clip of Charlie standing in front of the hotel nervously waving to the camera while Angel Dust appeared behind her pulling the two-fingers over the head prank with all four arms.
Come place your fate in her inexperienced hands as she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you!
Here we offer FUN THINGS, such as somewhat functional staff and 24-hour PEST CONTROL.
A drunk Husk is seen passing out on his bar counter while Niffty was chasing a bug around with a needle.
CUSTOM ROOMS,
A toilet in a bathroom was shown.
And just look at this tacky parlor!
A clip of the lobby was shown with a support beam falling from the ceiling and landing on a table scaring KeeKee away.
Enjoy riveting conversation with our singular resident. Even try to pet the hotel's resident guard dog who happens to be the adopted son of Lucifer and Lilith!
Angel was shown sitting on a couch minding his own business before flipping off the camera. Then it showed Fenrir sleeping on the couch until he heard Alastor's words and snapped awake to look at the camera and the Radio Demon with a look of fury.
"Get that camera away from me, you fuck-!"
WOW!
All this and more at the Hazbin Hotel!
Your last desperate attempt at salvation starts here!
A message in big letters appeared at the bottom of the screen that read:
CALL NOW!
OR DON'T! I DON'T CARE!
WE STILL DON'T HAVE A WORKING PHONE!
The TV is then turned off by Alastor who turns to look expectantly at Charlie, Vaggie and Fenrir who were sitting on the couch. "So, what do you think?" The smiling Radio Demon asks.
"I'm sorry, what the fuck was that?" Vaggie asked, not liking the video one bit.
"You actually recorded me for the commercial, you asshole?!" Fenrir said as he growled under his mask, "I was having my nap!"
"Guys." Charlie cut in then turned to her business partner. "One note, Alastor," she said as sincerely as she could be. The Radio Demon's eyes narrowed a little while his fingertips slightly scratched the top of the TV a bit. "I mean, first off, thank you so much for making this. Seriously, oh amazing. But, um, maybe the tone is a bit… off." His eyes narrowed a little more. "We want people to want to come here. This makes it look, um…"
"Bad," Vaggie bluntly finished the sentence. "The word you're looking for is bad."
"Funny. I was going for hilarious," Alastor replied shamelessly.
"Dick." Fenrir scoffed, crossing his arms.
"It didn't explain anything about how we're trying to save demons from extermination, which is the whole fucking point!" Vaggie said angrily.
"And for the tenth fucking time... I am not a guard dog!" Fenrir snarled. Oh, this was Alastor's way of payback after Fenrir dumped one of the deer carcasses in his room while the Radio Demon was out. It was one of the corpses Fenrir and Loona had hunted during their date/hunt on Earth a couple of days ago, and Fenrir made sure to let Alastor know that he envisioned the deer as Alastor. Every. Single. One.
And he took pleasure in gutting them.
Clearly Alastor decided to get back at him.
"Vaggie and Fenrir are right, Alastor. The commercial was to let Sinners know we are trying to help them." Charlie said calmly.
Alastor gave a shrug as he stated, "Well, my dear, I haven't been active in Hell for some time and everyone remembers me from my radio show, the proper medium to express oneself. But, you insisted on THIS noisy picture box advertisement." He said while tapping the television twice with his microphone staff "So, I had a little fun with it."
Vaggie stood up, not happy with the way Alastor is handling things ever since he came to help with the hotel. "Oh, fun? You had a little fun with it? Well, this is not what we want to represent us. When you showed up here a week ago, you told us you would help run this hotel. Instead, you're mocking us. Nobody's gonna wanna come to a place that a powerful Overlord like you thinks is a waste of time."
Angel, who lay on the other couch, raised his hand, catching everyone's attention.
"What?" Vaggie asks.
"If you're filming a commercial, can I suggest you take better advantage of the talented celebrity you have right here?" Angel proposed with a lustful smirk to use himself in the commercial as he pointed his three arms to himself while holding up a bottle of alcohol in his fourth.
Vaggie narrowed her eye. "Angel, you're a porn star." She reminded him.
"A famous porn star. I'll have the horniest Sinners knocking these walls down to get in." Angel declared.
Fenrir sighed and rolled his eyes. "We are not filming a porno for the commercial."
"Why not? Sex sells, don't it? I swear if you film me goin' at it with you and mister fancy talk-creepy voice here, you'd be rollin' in participants willing to stay at this tacky hotel." Angel told them while pointing at Fenrir and Alastor, who appeared beside the couch.
Alastoe laughed. "Ha! Never going to happen!"
"Ditto." Fenrir agreed. "And I already have a girlfriend."
"You should really bring her over a lot more." Charlie whispered to him, making him look at her. "Come on, I want to get to know my future sister-in-law."
"...Loona and I just started dating, Charlie." Fenrir said, sighing as he pinched the bridge of his muzzle. "We aren't getting married."
"Yet." Charlie cheekily said, earning an annoyed look from her little brother. She then looked at Angel. "Angel, I appreciate you wanting to use your special skills to, um, attract folks to the hotel, but I really don't want to exploit you in that way." She told him.
"Oh, please, baby. This body was made to be exploited. I got the arms, I got the stamina, I got the legs. I got the lung capacity." He laughed a bit. "Oh, I got the legs, the gag reflex, the holes, the chest fluff everyone thinks are tits."
"Will you please stop?" Fenrir asked, exasperated while Charlie nervously chuckles before noticing her phone rings, showing that her father, Lucifer, was calling.
"Hold that thought! I'll be right back." Charlie said while walking away, picking up the phone. "Hello? Dad?"
Fenrir, who had heard the call, perked his ears up when hearing that their dad was calling. However, he turned back to Angel when the porn star spoke.
"I could keep goin' all night, baby." Angel added before looking at Fenrir. "Say, Fen, you should really bring that Hellhound of yours around. You two would be a hit in a porno."
"No." Fenrir deadpanned at him.
Angel shrugged. "Your loss, pal." He took a sip from his drink before asking as he glanced at Alastor "Hey, I have a question. If freaky face over there is so powerful, then why can't he just MAKE people to stay?"
Alastor shrugged while still showing his usual grin "Oh, trust me," before forming a mischievously creepy look with dark magic and deer horns grew on his head "-I can."
"Why do you think I'm here?" Everyone looked to the bar where Husk was cleaning a glass. "You actually think I would be cleaning bottles and listening to you fucks bitch and moan all the time if he wasn't forcing me?"
Niffty popped up on the counter. "I like being forced." She admitted cheerily.
Husk gave her a disturbed look. "Keep that to yourself, Niff."
Angel, liking the way how Husk complains, says in a teasing voice. "What? You don't love being here with me, Whiskers?"
Husk glared at him. "Call me Whiskers again and I'll jam that bottle down your throat." He threatened.
This hardly put Angel off as it seemed to make him more excited. "Kinky! Come on, keep talking dirty to me."
"Ugh." Fenrir shook his head. "You two are such a headache."
"Angel, let Husk do his job." Vaggie interrupted. "And no, we can't force Sinners to stay here."
"I'm choosing to be here and I think it's all stupid. We're in Hell, toots. That's kind of the end of the road, ain't it?" Angel asked her.
"So I've been hearing from Blitz." Fenrir muttered with an eye roll. Maybe he should alter the agreement made, have Blitzo, Moxxie and Millie work at the hotel as part of security, make them see the project for themselves.
"Well, maybe it doesn't have to be. Just because nobody has made it out before doesn't mean it's not possible." Vaggie pointed out as Angel placed a hand on Vaggie's shoulder, giving her a deadpan expression.
"Hey, whatever means I can keep crashing here rent-free. Crack is expensive." He told her, getting a similar deadpan expression from Vaggie.
Back with Charlie, who still on the phone with her Dad, becomes really happy as her father asks her to meet with the leader of the Angel Army in his stead.
"Yeah, I can totally yeah. I'll head over there right away. Okay!" she hangs up the phone and gasps in excitement before cheering "Yes! YES! Hahahaha!" she giggles with excitement and calls to Vaggie and Fenrir "VAGGIEFENRIRHOLYSHIT!"
"What?" Fenrir looked over with Vaggie.
Charlie mumbles with excitement "Get over here!"
The two shared a look before they walked over to their sister/girlfriend respectively. "What's going on?" Fenrir asked, raising a furry brow at how happy Charlie looks. "You're as jumpy and happy as you were when we went to Lu Lu World on my fifth birthday."
Charlie took a deep breath to calm her nerves so she can explain, "My Dad just called, he said that the leader of the Angel Army wants to meet. He asked if I could go instead!" she explained fast due to her excitement and grabs the two while hyperventilating.
Fenrir's eyes widened at this and he shared a look with Vaggie. "Woah, woah, woah, back up there a moment, Charlie. The Angels want to chat? It's been a week since the Extermination!"
Vaggie nodded in agreement. "What could they want now-"
And then Charlie broke into song.
I can do this!
Somehow, I know it!
"Not again." Fenrir sighed. Why does everyone have to burst into song at random?
"Charlie, hold on-" Vaggie started but Charlie continued.
There's just no way I could blow it.
Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance!
"It's just a meeting." Vaggie reminded her.
To change their minds.
And touch their hearts.
Or… whatever angels have!
Vaggie sighed. "This could be bad." She pointed out.
"No shit." Fenrir agreed.
Cheer up, Vaggie and Fenny!
This could be swell!
Something tells me that today will be a happy day in hell!
Charlie spun Vaggie around, and Fenrir had to grab her to stop her. "Charlie, just don't-" He started.
However, the doors were open with Alastor, Niffty and Angel looking out. "That bitch is halfway down the street." Angel commented.
"Is she...?" Vaggie started.
Angel nods. "Oh she's dancing."
"Goddamnit." Fenrir sighed before he took off after his sister. "Charlie! Wait the fuck up!"
Charlie was making her way through the streets, oblivious to the destruction and bodies of dead demons everywhere as she continued to sing.
There's a warm, fuzzy feeling.
That wafts through the air.
Every street so revealing.
It's hard not to stare!
She came across a window of a sex dungeon where a Hellhound was going at it with an imp with a sadomasochism mask. They noticed her as she immediately and awkwardly fled.
It's a realm so appealing it beats anywhere.
If you don't mind the smell.
She accidentally stepped on a dead shark demon that was releasing a very bad smelly fume into her nose. She cautiously avoids the corpse and presses on down the street.
It's a happy day in Hell!
"Not when you're meeting the bastard that leads the Exorcists." Fenrir mumbled as he ran on all fours after his sister.
Charlie waved at a demon who hid behind a newspaper to catch his attention, who revealed himself as a meth addict with a spoon full of meth in his mouth.
"Hi mister!" She greeted him.
"Go fuck yourself!" He yelled as she immediately panicked and walked away, while a demon opened a window, revealing his apartment was on fire.
There's an endless trash fire that's burning my soul!
"Hello!" Charlie greeted him upon seeing it.
And a ton of barbed wire to shove in his hole!
Charlie saw it as she panicked. "Ah, excuse me!"
Doing what is required, we all have our role.
I'm not doin' well!
Another shitty day in Hell!
Charlie climbed onto the trunk of a destroyed car and faced the other direction.
If I can show them the dream I've dreamed.
That any soul can change!
Back at the hotel, Vaggie watched from the watchtower as she called out to her.
Those angels' minds are hard to change.
Charlie smiled upon hearing it.
Then they will know everyone can be redeemed.
From the evil to the strange!
But Vaggie immediately disagreed with her on that subject.
They're bloodthirsty and deranged!
That however wasn't going to stop Charlie from accomplishing her mission.
I can hear all their stories.
The last and displaced.
And I know that they're more of an acquired taste.
But! If I open the door and I give them a place.
At my Hazbin Hotel. It'll be a happy day in Hell!
She hopped onto a truck that was driving by, hitching a ride from behind so she can get around the city much faster.
Fenrir sighed before he rushed after her
From the porn studio.
Where the cinephiles go.
To watch award-winning demon bukkade shows!
To Cannibal Town. Where they don't wear a frown 'cause-
Before she could continue, blood shot in her eye from one of the corpses that the cannibals were eating on.
Holy shit! Ew, my gosh! WHY?!
She got away from it as she exhaled.
And I don't give a crow that.
His brains got in my eye!
"You probably should." Fenrir told her as he caught up.
Cause I know I can spare them.
From Heaven's genocide!
I can do this, I just know it!
(There's an endless trash fire burning my soul.)
I'll get Heaven behind my plans!
There's just no way I could blow it.
(I kinda like the barbed wire that's shoved in my hole.)
Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance!
To change their minds!
She came across a slug with a trenchcoat who exhibited his nudist body in front of her, which immediately creeped her out.
And touch my parts!
Uh… No thank you.
I'm just gonna fulfill my destiny!
"Your loss, bitch!" The slug demon exclaimed, only to get punched in the face by Fenrir.
I can already tell!
Today is gonna be a fuckin' happy day in Hell!
The Morningstar siblings had finally arrived at the Heaven Embassy building, and just looking at it made Fenrir growl because of the uneasy feeling that it gave off. Plus, he's heard of the past few times his parents had gone to meetings with those from Heaven... Lilith would come home pissed off every. Single. Time. Ranting about a 'limp-dicked, controlling asshole who thinks he's tough shit because he's the First Man'.
That clued Fenrir in to who she was talking about the first time he heard her rant.
And from what Lilith has mentioned about her ex... the guy was an asshole. Plain and simple.
"You know, you didn't have to come." Charlie commented as they walked to the doors.
"Trust me, Char-Char, I'd rather be here than let you meet these fucks by yourself." Fenrir said firmly.
"They can't be that bad." Charlie said, trying to be optimistic.
Fenrir sighed. "You'll see when you meet the fucker."
Charlie pushed the door open and peered inside. "Hello?" She called, only to get no response. To her surprise, the place was deserted. She and Fenrir entered and made their way in, approaching a front desk. "Hello?"
"Of course they would've have anyone at the front desk." Fenrir rolled his eyes, looking at the little golden bell that was sitting there. Grumbling, Fenrir rang the bell which caused a golden scroll and feathered ink pen to appear before the siblings.
"Creepy." Charlie commented as she signed her name onto the scroll, same with Fenrir, then the scroll disappeared and twin doors opened up for them. The siblings entered, only to find themselves in a very dark room which was further engulfed when the doors closed behind them.
"Uh… hello? Is anyone here?" Charlie asked as she felt nervous.
The lights then suddenly switch on, revealing two angels at the end of the room. The first, who was sitting in the chair and eating some ribs, wore attire similar to the Exorcsists only a golden version of it, though with normal-looking eyes and golden facial expressions. The mask also held a pair of horns similar to an Exorcist, albeit longer, smoother, and with a golden ornamental attachment on the tips.
He also had a pair of large and golden wings on his back. His halo was bright gold in appearance, and similar to the Exorcists, has two spikes pointing up and down from each other, though these spikes are located at the front of his halo.
The second angel, who was standing behind the chair like some bodyguard or something, was a female angel wearing the gear all Exorcists wear.
"Sup." The male angel greeted them while chewing on a rib.
Charlie stumbled backwards in surprise only for Fenrir to grab her. "Holy shit!" Charlie quickly got up and readjust herself to introduce themselves properly. "Hi, I'm Charlie. My dad asked me if I could meet you."
The angel gave a shrug. "Yeah, I know."
"Okay, well, It's nice to meet you." Charlie said politely.
"Totally. It's nice to meet you, too." said the angel with a kind smile as he reaches over to give Charlie a handshake, and as she was about to shake his hand, Fenrir grabbed her arm and gently pulled her back.
"He's a hologram." Fenrir said with an annoyed tone at the bastard trying to trick his sister like that.
Said bastard groaned. "Oh man, I was close to getting her! Do you know how fun it is to get people like that?"
"No. And I don't care." Fenrir deadpanned.
Charlie looked confused as to why he was a hologram. "Uh...so, wait. You aren't here?" she asked.
"No, you think I'd come down there?" He said as he laughed, "No, I mean, I love the vibe, totally, I love your tunes. Pretty fucking hardcore, don't get me wrong. But! It's such a bummer! man. Everything down there's just so "eugh", ya know?" He said as he chuckled. "Ew."
Charlie looks around nervously before stealing her nerves to get her plans known, "Right. So, I'm happy we've got this opportunity to meet. There's a project that I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about-" before she continued, the angel put his finger on Charlie's lips to quiet her down for a moment.
"Hey, hey, hey, hey, slow down. We've got time. How about we get to know each other a little." He said as he grabbed another rib from a massive plate in front of him, "Mmm. How about lunch? You hungry? I got you." he said as he moved the plate to her, "Here's my personal favourite. You'll love it."
"It's not real as well. It's a projection like him." Fenrir said, growing more annoyed now.
"Ugh, c'mon! You're such a bummer!" The angel whined like a child.
Fenrir just shook his head at him. 'This is the First Man? The first human? Mom's ex? Ugh, hearing her talk about him was one thing, but I am starting to see why she dumped his ass.'
The scene cuts back to the Hazbin Hotel, where the workers and residents are summoned by Vaggie to discuss their poorly misleading commercial. Angel Dust is constantly looking at Husk with a seductive gaze while Husk is glaring daggers at him. Vaggie's legs come into the scene before switching back to in person.
"Okay, so Charlie and Fenrir are dealing with something very important, so while they're gone, we are making a new commercial. One that represents Charlie's vision and what we're doing here. So, we need a camera." Vaggie explained before looking at Alastor, "Alastor?" she asked.
Alastor simply snaps his fingers to conjure up a camera for Vaggie; however, the camera is a folding-type old photography camera from the 1930s with no recording films at that time. Vaggie gave him an unamused look.
"A video camera?" she specified
"Hmmm." Alastor hummed in disappointment before snapping his fingers again to create an actual video camera, despite his extreme distaste for modern technology.
"Alright! Let's do this!" Vaggie said with a confident smile as she started planning the new commercial.
The scene switches into the point of view of the video camera recording the bar scene, with Husk behind the counter reading a script in his claws and Angel Dust sitting on a bar stool. The camera whirrs as it brings the two into focus.
"And… Action!" Vaggie said from behind the camera.
Husk carefully reads the lines on his script, bringing the script closer to read.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Can I help you with anything?" Husk read, although the way he read it aloud was obvious he hadn't done acting before.
"I've been a bad boy, and I need a big, strong daddy to put me in my place…on the path to redemption!" Angel said flirtatiously but also still somehow staying on script…mostly.
Husk groans with displeasure and reads the script again. "Well, you come—"
"Oh, yes!" Angel moaned, interrupting Husk who gave him an annoyed glare.
"…to the right place." he continued
Vaggie had enough and stopped recording, "Cut! Okay, Angel, I need you to be less horny if possible, and Husk, can you maybe not have the script in front of your face?" Vaggie suggested.
"I ain't no actor! I can't memorize this shit!" Husk exclaimed angrily.
"Well, we could improve this shit, baby cakes." Angel said teasingly as he gets closer to Husk's face. "Rrawwr." he purred seductively before Husk gets irritated by Angel Dust and shoves him off the counter painfully hard.
"Whoops." Husk said, clearly not sorry about it before he grabs a bottle and drinks it.
"Husk, come on." Vaggie said offscreen.
Back at the Heaven Embassy, both Charlie and Fenrir were looking more annoyed and bored as Adam, yes it is that Adam, went on and on about his life... his sex life mostly. And also showed what a fucking misogynist he was.
"So, I was playin' this gig, and for some fuckin' reason, this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer, and it's like, 'Do you know who I am? I'm fucking Adam. I'm the original dick!'. I'm the original dick!" Adam boasted, even gesturing to said dick.
Fenrir snorted. "You said it, pal. You are a dick."
"Yeah, I-wait..." Adam blinked then frowned. "You're mocking me, aren't you?"
"You called yourself a dick... think about it, dumbass." Fenrir retorted scathingly.
"Woah, woah, wait." Charlie cut in before anything could escalate. "You're Adam? Adam as in..." Her eyes widened as she realizes this is her mother's ex, and now she sees why she left him. "Ohhhh. That explains so much."
Fenrir nodded in agreement.
"I know. I fucking rock." Adam said arrogantly while he smirked.
Realizing who she was talking to, the princess decided to try a new approach. "Well, Adam, sir. Mr. Adam, sir."
"Call me, Dickmaster."
"Adam." Yeah, she was not going to call him that. "You seem like a smart… well, strand up guy."
"Uh-huh." Adam nodded.
"He's not." Fenrir deadpanned.
"And I know you are the leader of the angels."
"Because they couldn't get anyone else for the job." Fenrir added, ignoring Adam's glare.
"And you are a big thinker,"
"He's not."
"A revolutionary,"
"He wishes."
"A– a genius!"
"Hardly."
"I mean, your words, babe," Adam said flattered, and trying to ignore Fenrir's comments.
"Who would really love to put his name on something."
"Fucking love putting my name on shit! Shit's the best!"
"It's a solution to our biggest problem!"
"Oh, herpes. Yeah, that's a bitch." Adam said, completely missing Charlie's point.
Charlie shook her head at this "No! Our... other biggest problem." she said, trying to steer him closer to what she meant
"Oh…uh..ugly people?" Adam said as he smirked and looked…somewhere, before looking back to Charlie, "Math? Global Warming? Nah, wait, that's Earth's problem. Ummmm..." Adam kept guessing as Charlie and Fenrir stared at Adam with deadpan annoyance at how ignorant he is.
Back at the hotel. Niffty tries to stab a bug that was crawling around but misses.
"Stab! Stab! Stab!" Nifty said as she was laser focused on killing the bug.
"Alright Niffty, Niffty. Niffty!" Vaggie said as she got the small maid demon to stop stabbing, "Your line is "We have the cleanest rooms", okay?"
"Got it. I'm ready." Nifty said with a smile as Vaggie turned the camera to Niffty.
"Action!" Vaggie said, however upon saying action, instead of saying the line, Niffty freezes and stares blankly at the camera without a breath or blinking from the scene. Vaggie lowers the camera, looking puzzled. Angel also peered in. Close up on Niffty making a blank stare with an ominous shrinking pupil. Angel slowly backs away, already creeped out.
"Uhh, cut." Vaggie said as Niffty snaps out of it and back to her cheerful self as she giggles.
"How was that?" Niffty asked
"Well, Niffty, you actually have to say the line, so let's roll again." Vaggie said, not sure if Niffty understood her task.
"Ok!" Niffty said
"Action!" Vaggie said once more, but Niffty freezes again, leaving Vaggie irritated, as Angel comes close to her face.
"You're doing great, Vagina." He commented.
"Cut!" She stopped recording as she was feeling irritated. "Alright, uhh… maybe we can try to fix it in post." She suggested.
"Do you even know what that means?" Angel asked her.
"I'll figure it out!" She yelled angrily as she stormed out of the room,
In a dark room, Vaggie sat on a couch as she stared at the screen, watching the poorly edited shots of the commercial, groaning in frustration as Alastor entered the room. "Seems like you're having a bit of trouble there, hmmm?" He asked her as he walked past her.
She groaned upon hearing his voice. "Ugh, este pendejo… Why are you even here?" She asked him as Alastor took a seat on the couch alongside her.
"For the entertainment." He informed her as his shadow slips out of his form before reappearing behind the couch, making laughing gestures. "I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly, like you are doing right now. Good job!" He complimented her efforts, rather sarcastically.
Ticked off by his shitty compliment, Vaggie took the camera and stood up as she began recording. "And here is Alastor, the egocentric piece of shit that-" Before she could record his face, the camera glitched violently from green to red and Vaggie freaked out as she quickly dropped the sparking camera onto the floor.
"I wouldn't try that, my dear." He told her as he pointed at his face. "This face was made for radio." He told her as his pupils turned into the shape of radio dials, and the scene nearly static before fixing itself back to normal.
Vaggie certainly had it with Alastor's insults and walks up to him, "That's it. I don't care who or what you are. If you're staying here, you're going to make this work, because it won't be so "entertaining" to watch over an empty hotel, will it, shitass?" Vaggie said as she was gonna make sure Alastor would stop screwing things up for them and get him to help.
As Vaggie returns to her chair, Alastor watches her with narrowed eyes before shrugging, "Fair enough." he said before he approaches her, "I'll tell you what. Let's make a deal."
"Pfft, you think I'm that stupid, making a deal with a demon like you?"" Vaggie asked with a raised brow, she knew deal making with demons was bad, especially with Alastor.
"Not for your soul, just a simple deal." Alastor assured, "I do this for you, and you never ask me to engage with this frivolous television technology ever again." Alastor said as he pointed to the TV with his cane.
Vaggie pondered but was having second thoughts on letting Alastor do the work for her, thinking he might just screw everything up again.
"Or…Charlie can come back to absolutely nothing. Your choice." Alastor said, throwing in the bait to get Vaggie hooked on the deal.
Vaggie glances away for a brief moment before sighing, making her decision.
"Fine." she said as Vaggie picks up the camera and places it in Alastor's hand, where green energy skulls start swirling around it.
"Now then!" Alastor starts as he evaporates the camera with a clap of his hand, then snaps his fingers, conjuring equipment for a film set, summoning Angel Dust, Husk, and Niffty, and dressing up everyone in the Roaring Twenties. Ink demons are conjured up as additional film crew members.
"Alright everyone," Vaggie said as she gets a costume change too similar to everyone's outfits, "let's make a fucking commercial."
Back at the Heaven Embassy, the meeting was not going well as Adam has somehow went from guessing Hell's biggest problem to going into a sexist rant about women and his masculinity.
"You know when you take her out for the fifth time and she still expects you to pay the check but you're like, "Hey, I thought you wanted equality."" he said as he made his voice high pitched to mimic a woman's voice.
"NO! Our shared problem of overpopulation in Hell!" Charlie exclaimed, tired of Adam going on and getting further from the problem she wanted to be known
"Ohh." Adam pauses, then laughs, "Well, that's not a problem! We got that covered!" Adam said as he looked to the other angel, "Lute, how many demons did you kill this year?"
"Got a good 275 this year, sir." Lute said as she stood at attention.
"275? Woah! Badass! Awesome job, danger tits! Pound it." Adam congratulates as he raises a fist for Lute to make a fist-bump, which she does.
"Uh no, not awesome. Those are my people. You know that, right?" Charlie said, hoping they felt remorse of some sort.
"Oh yeah. That must suck for you!" Adam said before he burst into laughter.
"But these are souls...Human souls just the same as the ones you have up in Heaven." Charlie said as she tried to reason with them.
"They are not the same. They had their chance and they earned damnation." Lute said coldly as she glared at Charlie with pure hatred.
Fenrir glared right back. "Girl, you better check your damn tone when you address my sister."
Lute turned her glare onto him. "Or what, mutt?"
"Or I'll come up there and fucking end you myself." Fenrir growled. "And don't fucking tempt me, because I will do it!"
"Wait, wait, sister?" Adam blinked, looking between Fenrir and Charlie before he realized something and laughed. "Oh my God, you're my ex-wife's pet mutt that she and that asshole of hers adopted?!" He laughed. "What, they couldn't try for another kid after having this one, so they just took a mutt and adopted?! That's fucking rich! Must've been some parents, huh?"
"How's Cain and Abel?" Fenrir retorted, making Adam shut up.
"Okay, easy." Charlie cut in, looking at Fenrir pleadingly and he huffed, calming down somewhat before Charlie looked at the two angels. "You're wrong. Sinners make mistakes in their lives, sure, but everyone makes mistakes."
"Angels don't make mistakes." Lute said with a glare.
"Oh yeah?" Fenrir raised a brow.
"Yeah." Lute nodded.
"Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life." Adam said with his elf-absorption kicking in despite him making every mistake there was in creation multiple times and believed himself untouchable due to being the first human on Earth and his god complex.
"I'm sorry, who was it that ate the apple in the Garden of Eve again?" Fenrir asked pointedly with a smirk. "Oh... and didn't Heaven fuck up when they cast out Lucifer? In turn, creating the 'most evil being in existence' just because they didn't like what he suggested."
"Oh look at the time!" Adam said as he pointed to a nonexistent watch on his wrist, "Oops, almost out of time. Guess we should get into it."
Fenrir rolled his eyes at how they didn't even admit to it.
"Oh, fuck!" Charlie exclaimed, completely forgetting this was a limited time meeting, which Adam dragged out with his talks and comments as she rushed to present her plan as fast as she could, summoning a stack of papers to the table.
"Okay, I've got a lot to get through and not a lot of time, and I feel like you weren't hearing me before, so here it goes" she said before clearing her throat as music is heard again, a somewhat sped up version of the music from earlier
I know Hell's population is out of control
It's a bad situation
It's taking a toll
If we rehab these sinners
And cleanse all their souls
At my Hazbin Hotel-
"Charlie, you're getting ahead of yourself" Fenrir said, handing over a few more drawings.
"Right! Extermination!" Charlie said and continued singing, while Adam looked uninterested and Lute was in a glaring match with Fenrir.
I know you guys fly down
Just to kill once a year
And it must be annoying
To schlep all the way here
If they join you in Heaven
That trip disappears
Charlie: You can wave that chore farewell
Both: It'll be a happy day in-
But Adam then interrupted them.
Let me stop you right there
Fenrir blinked.
Save us all precious time
"Okay…" Charlie said uncomfortably and confused.
Adam smirked evilly.
If you're suggesting is letting them climb
Up the ladder
Oh they'd rather cross the Pearly Gates?
"Yes-" Fenrir started but Adam continued his rock song while staring in Fenrir's face.
Sorry, doggy. But there's no defyin' their fates!
Hell is forever
Whether you like it or not!
Had your chance to behave better
Now you boil in the pot!
Cause the rules are black and white
There's no use in tryin' to fight!
They're burnin' for their lives
Until we kill 'em again!
(And you, bitch!)
While Fenrir glared at Adam, Charlie awkwardly smiled, trying to convince him, "Okay, but-"
But Adam wouldn't listen and kept singing his mocking and god complex song, thinking he's high above anyone else and can do whatever he wants.
Just try to chillax, babe
You're wasting your breath
"Shut up." Fenrir muttered, growing increasingly more angry the longer Adam mocked him and his sister.
Did I hear you imply
That they don't deserve death?
Are they winners?
Are they sinners?
Cause it's cut and dry!
Charlie tried to show a planning of her redeeming plan in the Hazbin Hotel "Well, actually, if you take a look-"
Fair is fair
An eye for an eye!
He then flew up, like walking down from the clouds like he's a self-proclaimed saint.
And when all's said and done
(Said and done)
There's the question of fun
(Fun)
And those of us with Divine Ordainment
Extermination is ENTERTAINMENT!
Adam then played guitar, mocking them that he's above everyone
Bow-no-no-nownow
Guitar solo, fuck yeah!
Finally, Fenrir snapped. "ENOUGH!" He roared in a dark, demonic voice, cutting Adam's song short and a powerful wind blew even the two angels back, Adam into his chair and Lute against the wall, while a hellfire spectral of a four-legged Hellhound appeared above Fenrir, glaring down at the two angels.
One good thing about being Lucifer and Lilith's son was the access to some interesting magic to practice with.
Fenrir had his hands pressed into the table, his claws digging into them, as he glared at the two. "You two are gonna shut the fuck up! You dare mock my sister's dream?!"
"What the fuck is happening?" Adam asked nervously as fires sprouted up around them. "How the fuck is he doing this?"
"What is happening? I'll tell you what's happening." Fenrir grinned and the spectral Hellhound lean in closer to Adam and Lute, who backed up against the wall. "WELCOME TO HELL, MOTHERFUCKERS!"
Soon, Fenrir reigned in control and had the spectral Hellhound disappear, the fires extinguishing, while Adam and Lute didn't know whether to be scared shitless or what.
"Charlie, we're leaving." Fenrir announced and turned to leave.
"But wait-" Charlie started.
"Charlie, they're not going to listen. They're nothing but fucking pricks who are spitting on your dream." Fenrir said, glaring at Adam and Lute who were recomposing themselves now. "Let's go. We'll find another way."
Charlie didn't want to argue with her brother, so she sighed and went to follow when Adam got their attention.
"Hey, you two!" The siblings looked back at Adam to see his cocky grin was back. "Guess what? We can't wait another year to exterminate those Sinner fucks! So we'll be back in sic months!"
"Wait, what?!" Both siblings shouted, only to be blown right out the door, which then slammed shut.
Charlie starts to tear up as she vents her anger, "Ugh, SHIT!" she said as she slammed her fist on the closed door
"Motherfuckers!" Fenrir snarled, then took in a deep breath to calm down before he guided Charlie out of the building.
The two arrived back at the hotel, Fenrir's arm around his sister's shoulders as he rubbed her arm comfortingly. The meeting had not gone the way they wanted, and Fenrir was pissed.
As they entered the lobby, Vaggie saw them. "Charlie! Fenrir!" She walked over to them. "How did it go?"
"Bad." Was all Fenrir said as he walked over to the couch where everybody else was, plopping down on the floor with an exhale.
"You look like shit." Husk commented.
"You would be if you were dealing with Adam and his bullshit." Fenrir sighed.
Vaggie grabbed Charlie's hands and brought her over to join everyone else. "Come here! We have something exciting to show you both. Alastor pulled some strings and it's about to air."
"I pulled a few limps too, hahaha!" Alastor said as a joke.
As Charlie sat with Vaggie on the couch, Charlie asked surprised. "Wait? The commercial? You all made a new one?"
Angel nodded. "Yeah, one of my better performances if I do say so myself."
"That's… that's amazing," Charlie said beaming with happiness.
"Shh, it's starting," Angel shushed.
Everyone's attention was now focused on the television screen. This was it. Now they would see all their hard work pay off. Hopefully this would make people start to take them more seriously and give the hotel a chance.
The commercial had now started. Everyone, except for Fenrir and Alastor (who was glitching during the scene), appeared standing in front of the hotel entrance dressed in the clothes Alastor had provided.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel–" Vaggie began before she was interrupted by the logo of 666 News with a Breaking News report.
Vaggie, Charlie, Angel, and Fenrir all began to voice their anger and annoyance. Charlie's eyes turned red and horns began to protrude from her head. Fenrir growled before leaning back with his arms crossed, a displeased look on his face. Alastor and Niffty were the only ones that didn't look bothered by the news interruption, the former taking pleasure in the displeasure of the others.
"Breaking news in Hell today," said Katie Killjoy, the tall, slim, big-headed head anchor woman of 666 News.
"Why the fuck does she sound like Blitz?" Fenrir asked with a tilt of his head, before he smirked. Oh he was so going to mock Blitzo with his.
"We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy that the next Extermination is happening sooner than ever before. Do you know what that means, Tom?"
"No, what does that mean, Katie?" asked Tom Trench, Katie's gas mask-wearing co-anchorman.
"It means we're all royally fucked!"
It then showed footage of the Heaven Embassy. The sound of people screaming was heard as the number of days on the golden clock tower to the next Extermination reduced from 358 to 176.
Everyone, except Alastor and Niffty, sat up with horrified expressions on their faces. They now had even less time to prepare for the next heavenly massacre.
"Wait, what?" Angel said shocked. "Why?!"
"Fucking Adam..." Fenrir snarled in rage, his hands clenched into fists. He heard his phone ding to indicate he got a message and looked to see it was from Loona.
(IS THIS FUCKING TRUE?! SIX MONTHS UNTIL THE NEXT EXTERMINATION?!) The text said.
Fenrir sighed. This is a total clusterfuck.
And that's it for this chapter, folks. Let me know what you think in the reviews, please.