Chapter 9: A Grave Encounter

It's 10 October today.

The date Kyuubi Incident happens.

Which means the day a lot of people died.

My mom particularly.

According to records, my mother's was declared MIA. Her body never recovered, probably reduced to paste when Kyuubi titanic paws squashed her. Probably burnt to ashes. Who knows?

My father however died much later. "Fatally injured" on the line of duty, went into coma from sepsis and died a week later, despite Konoha's "best medical effort."

Best my ass. Tsunade was off drinking and gambling herself away like a moron. It's been decades. Grow up. Fucking spoiled princess.

Konoha simply just burn my father's body, put his ashes into one big pot along many others as if it's an ashy orgy and called it a day. They put a big slab of stone carved "Here lies Heroes of the Leaf sacrificing themselves against the terror of Ninetails" and call it a tragedy monument. Not even bothering to list all the names, just the major clans ones, since it wouldn't fit to list them all.

This fucking village, I swear.

So, unlike most people, I don't go the monument to pay respect for the dead. 2 years ago, I took a Sakura sapling and plant it at the hill outside the walls.

I put a random stone near it and carve, Here lies Makoto Raikou and Makoto Shizuka.

I brought orange juice and some bread, lay down some flowers, just random wildflowers I picked along the way. I didn't bring the food as offerings. The dead has no need for food. I just brought it as I dunno, family lunch I guess.

"Heya, pops. Mom."

I water the sakura plant. It looks like it's growing nicely. In five or 6 years, it may start to flower.

Wonder if I will get to see it…

I not going to actually talk literally to a grave. Since I know a couple of ANBU agents are hiding just behind the trees monitoring me. So my parents gonna have to settle with me just monologuing in my heart. Or head. Whatever.

As I start munching bread, I reveal,

Welp. Mom and dad, I just got expelled lol.

)))))) few weeks ago (((((((

"This is outrageous! I demand his head, Hiruzan!!"

A very angry Hyuuga Hi… Hai…. Hyuuga Jefferson Davis is Karening very intensely in front of the Hokage.

So it turns out, I pretty much crippled Neji. Whoops.

Sure, after Naruto beat the shit out of him in canon he was humbled I guess, but only because Jeff finally give the damn kid his dad's suicide letter. The whole Hyuuga Incident was stupid and one of Sarutobi Hiruzan best achievement as the most pussy Hokage in history.

Well, Neji was a fucking dick that for all his preachings about Fate he sure as hell doing his damn best to defy it tsunderely. I was fine to just settle with trading verbal barbs and then he proceed to go into the yo mama jokes territory.

Welp, his funeral then. I don't do yo mama jokes even to my worse enemies.

So we dueled, I won, legally changed his name to Bitch Slave and pretty much burnt his nervous system. Neji hands will always be a vibrator now. I pretty much killed his career.

"eh, it's just a slave. What's the big deal I broke him?" I attempt to pacify Jeff diplomatically.

"Slave?!! He's my nephew!"

"Jeff, you enslaved your own nephew?! I thought you're better than this!"

"My name is not Jeff! I will make you pay, boy!"

The Hokage sighed for yet another drama I caused. Man ever since I got transferred to Class A it's been one scandal over another. What can I say, the kids are jackass.

I am a petty person. You shouldn't have transferred me.

As Jeff and the Hokage continue their debate, I choose to tune out and watch John Wick in my brain.

What? I don't only watch anime man. I am a cultured person who partake in western, Korean and Chinese media too.

)))))))present day (((((((

I drink my orange juice as I continue.

Well, not expelled, exactly.

Basically, the school year has ended a week ago and with that I have officially graduated.

Ding Ding ding!

Since the Hokage refuse to punish me since Neji is injured in legally sanctioned Duel, meaning he forfeit any claim for suing, the Hyuuga along with Inuzuka and several other mid rank clans unite their political powers together and force Hiruzan to do something about me anyway.

Well, they want me expelled and chakra sealed, but the Hokage settled on my behalf and "graduate" me into Genin Corps. That's the compromise they all settled.

Heh…

Hehehe…

HahahahHahahahahhJaaaHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHSHHAHAHA!!!!

All according to keikaku!!!

Finally, I made it!

Oh, all those elite bastards think they really got me huh? They can't punish me, so they just have to settle with ruining my career huh?

Jokes on them, this is what I aiming for this whole time!

Goodbye Plot! Let Naruto and Sasuke deal with that!

I'm finally free!

Well partially. Still, progress.

Now, I will admit I don't really plan this outcome. As I said. I'm bad at math.

I calculate this outcome without knowing the proper formula, so I just made up my own bullshit formula and just hope something sticks.

Whoop de doo, I graduated. Honestly I just expect to get demoted to Class B so that I become less canon compliant but eh, graduated straight into Genin Corps is a much better outcome. Finally some luck!

Sasuga Ninja egotism! Sugoi desune!

They really think they really got me lol.

Mom, dad, your son will escape this hellhole of a village and live a proper life. One step at a time.

I will escape The Plot no matter what!

Anyway, I present you two some violin songs. Man it sucks that my chakra is all Lightning now. I can't use storage seal scrolls anymore.

)))))))Cat and Dog POV(((((((

"He plays a sad song again, today."

Cat commented to her partner, Dog, as they watch over the newly minted Genin under Hokage's order. He's not taking risk of the new bloodline owner from being assassinated by one of the clans that has grudge against the boy.

Dog is fiddling with a coin between his fingers, sparks of electricity emit from it.

"Now is not the time to practice, Dog"

Dog hummed. Seriously how did that boy do it? Dog believe he has great control over Lightning chakra, but even with Sharingan he can't decipher what Makoto Hotaru really did to perform the Raijin Arrow (Railgun).

And how he mimicked the Third Kazekage Magnet Style. They triple checked his chakra affinity and it's still just pure Lightning. So how did Makoto do it?

"Dog, what do you think of him?"

Dog mulled over Cat's question.

"He aimed for this. The Hokage stated that Makoto never wanted to be promoted. He had always aimed to be a simple career Genin. Umino is wrong to assess that Makoto is a latent psychopath prone to sudden bout of violence. All the scandals he did? It's all calculated.", Dog concludes.

"Are you sure? I read his academic records, and he doesn't seem to be a smart person.

Yes. He barely passed math. He can calculate, okay, but Makoto is really slow at solving basic math.

"Academics is not the only form of intelligence, Cat. Makoto isn't smart conventionally, but he is a genius in navigating crisis."

Dog has personally witnessed Makoto solves political crisis that he had no right to win. Makoto Hotaru, a mere clanless brat had gone toe to toe into verbal spars against every clan leaders he had clashed with. And somehow win.

And no, he doesn't win through intelligent wit and political maneuvers.

He just win by being utterly fearless and stupid.

Even among the upper echelon of ninja society, Makoto Hotaru is infamous for being undefeatable in debate.

Because, you can't reason with stupid.

Dog recalls his first encounter with the kid.

(The night after Makoto Hotaru meet the Hokage and negotiated Uchiha Sasuke transfer to class 3-A)

Dog has escorted Makoto back to his apartment. When he's about to leave him by the door, Makoto asked him,

"Hey, do you read Icha Icha?"

This lead to Dog having brought into the Makoto Conspiracy. Makoto has seduced him with 10 chapter manuscripts of what he called, Icha Icha: Doujin Edition, and it blown his mind, nay, his perception of the world.

He thought Icha Icha series is already peak literature, but what Makoto had shown him elevates the story, nay, mythos, into the realm of godhood.

The characters was drawn just as described, beautiful as the the gods themselves and the scenes reenactment. Oh the the scenes!

Never Dog can be satisfied to regular porn anymore. Not that he watched porn much, he's more of a book person. But now he is enlightened! Doujinshi is the next step of literary evolution and he about to see the birth of The Messiah, who tragically, about to be snuffed from existence.

So Dog, after the Sakura Incident, had told him to invoke The Duel if he really need to beat this out someone. That seem to keep him out of trouble for some time.

He did not expect he proceed to cripple the Hyuuga lord's nephew.

(Current time)

"Makoto Hotaru is unpredictable. His moves can't be read. His wisdom is beyond mortal ken. I thought I was good at playing stupid with Gai, but Makoto made my tricks looks like baby steps. He is Konoha's Number One Idiot Savant."

Cat just look at Dog, sweating profusely.

"What?"

"Nothing Yugao. I'm just rambling."

Dog watch over the Master of Outstupid Maneuvers. Now that he is expelled, no, graduated, Makoto is out of most dangers.

He can now live a simple life of career Genin. Tho really it's more accurate to say he just the town janitor now. He seen his sector application. Makoto had applied to city mantainance division.

Still, he is mostly safe from dangerous missions, with a lot of free time to work on his art. And Dog will watch over him as long as he could.

Dog swear to protect Makoto Hotaru with his life, as his Number One Fan!