Chapter 10: Hotpot and Uno
Making my way downtown, walking fast
Faces pass and I'm home bound
"Tutu tutu tutuuuuu tu tu
Tutu tutu tutuuuuu tu tu"
Staring blankly ahead, just making my way
Making a way through the crowd...
"Tutu tutu tutuuuuu tu tu
Tutu tutu tutuuuuu tu tu"
While I'm vibing with Avril Lavigne song blaring in my head, I shovel the snow out of the road.
Hi, Makoto Hotaru here, 11 years old and a proud member of Genin City Mantainance Division. I shovel snow, take away the trashes, and overall keep our hometown nice and clean. What a jolly day today huh?
It's a new year and the future looks bright.
"keh Keh KEH. Look at him now. Nothing more than a janitor."
"serves him right. He belongs to the streets"
"That's what he gets for thinking of defying his betters."
Hmm I nod at their mockery. Indeed I deserve this. I deserve this freedom. The freedom from bullshit plots and getting sent by the Hokage to suicide missions.
"Hey leave him alone!"
Ah, Naruto came to my rescue it seems. Along with him is Sasuke with his trademark Ninpou: Uchiha Glare no Jutsu. The noname kids quickly boot themselves outta here.
"You deserve better than this, Hotaru."
Sasuke try to I dunno, show his support I guess.
"This has always been the plan folks. I just want to do my mandatory service years in peace and retire. I'm not like you weirdoes that want to go to suicide missions for fun."
Sasuke frowned. "But you're wasting your talent here. You have a gift. You should at least applied to better division than this. What did they pay you for this? Pennies?"
"First of all, all I want is just to hole up in my room and draw mangas. I never want to be a ninja in the first place. I take this cleaner job so that I don't have to deal with all that ninja crap to begin with."
Naruto pouted,"Why did you hate being a ninja so much? Everything we do is cool!"
"yea, I admit that. I admit I do enjoy doing cool jutsu and do cool fights. But, what I resent is dying for for someone else orders. For someone else greed and politics. I refuse to play your murder drone games."
Sasuke look alarmed. "careful Hotaru. You sound treasonous."
"Eh. The ANBU is familiar with my "controversial opinions". As long I'm not spreading around my thoughts and do actual treason, they won't do anything to me. By the way, wave to that pole over there. That's an ANBU."
Sasuke and Naruto awkwardly wave to the pole I pointed at. I can feel the agent move away to another spot, alarmed that I detected him.
No one can hide from me, man. Electromagnetic Sense ftw.
"Even then, you are a Shinobi of Konoha. You are sworn to duty." Sasuke argued
"Sworn with a metaphorical blade at my neck. We never have a choice, Sasuke. But who cares. I'll follow my orders. For 10 years. 10. Years. After that, I'm out."
"There's no guarantee they will let you go."
"Oh sure, I fully expect I will get a sword at my back the day I walk out of this village. I know this. The village know this. No one really quits the Village. I know that is probably how this story will end."
"And you still intends to do so?" Sasuke look at me incredulously.
Naruto gulped his saliva. Maybe becoz he hangs around me too much, but he doesn't has as much of a rose tinted view of Konoha as canon Naruto did. He still love the village alright, but he now admits that maybe, this village is pretty screwed up.
"If I'm going to die, it will be on my terms. Not for someone's orders. Not for some worthless clients. Not for some propaganda I don't believe in. Even if my fate is to die with a sword on my back the day I step out of this village, that would be fine."
"why?" Naruto asked sadly.
"Because I rather die a free man than live in misery as a tool."
The rest of them are quiet, only the sound of me shoveling out snow echoes across the street. Not able to find words to argue, they leave. They just can't understand why I keep defying their culture. Their society.
They are bred to obey. To buy into their cult. To die pathetic deaths just because some fat merchant bastard pay the Hokage office some money and he sent some poor kids to sabotage rival companies.
Make no mistake, Naruto may have gone to do missions that looks good in nature, but he was just one Shinobi among the many. The Shinobi Villages profit over death and sabotage. It's a system that can never thrive from global peace. They are the Merchant of Conflicts and their currency is minted in blood.
Konoha was never the good guys.
Me? Oh, I'm not a really a moral person. I did punched a girl in the face and regret nothing. I don't really have a problem with Konoha, the Village Hidden in Hypocrisy as a business.
I just despise getting dragged into their cult.
Like hell I will sacrifice myself for these bastards.
))))))))))))
Since I graduated, I had been kicked out of the Cadet Dormitory.
So, Sasuke, my pretty okay friend, graciously asked his mom to rent me one of their house units.
So here I am, a proud tenant of the famed Uchiha Compound.
My humble small log cabin is just at the edge of the village walls, right next to the Naka river, surrounded by small woods. I am enjoying my day off, just drinking plain cool water, my favorite beverage of all time, when the two bozos crash into my cabin.
"HOTARU! FROM TODAY, WE WILL TRAIN TOGETHER AND MAKE YOU THE THIRD MOST AWESOME NINJA EVER!"
Naruto yell his declaration with gusto. Ah, my ears.
"I don't wanna,", I humbly declined his training opportunity.
"Look, the Hokage already anticipate this, so he send you this letter.", Sasuke passed to me a letter with all that official logo stuffl. it's even sealed with red wax. Fancy
It's written with the flowery poetry of bureaucratic efficiency, so my Writer-sama will simplify the content for you dummies.
-People want you dead
-I want you live
-So train, or I put you in jail
-sincerely, Flyingmonkey Hiruzen, The Hokage of All Time.
"Well shit.", I commented
"Now c'mon! Mikoto Ba-chan even let us use Sasuke's super secret training ground!" Naruto vibrates in excitement.
Urghhh. Great now I have to train with the threat of jail or worse. I have the face of an angel. I am totally prime five star SSR femboi material for those blue balled convict bastards. Hiruzen may have a semblance of liking for me, but he doesn't like me that much.
So, we walk into the Naka Shrine, go into the basement then Sasuke did this 108 hand signs combination to unlock the door to enter the basement of the basement. Which he thens did another signs sequence to unlock the basement of the basement of the basement. He did it five times until we reached a huge underground training facility that looks like the ripoff of Urahara's underground training room.
Even got genjutsu ceiling to make artificial blue sky.
I'm only immune to Genjutsu that interferes with brainwaves, okay. I'm just as vulnerable as anyone else to other forms of Genjutsu, like using chakra to make illusionary images.
"Awesome right, Hotaru?!" Naruto looks like he discovered the universe or something. Childlike sense of wonder. That's something I just don't have ever since I become an OC.
"Duh, of course clans have super secret underground training rooms. Where else they supposed to practice their super secret jutsu? At their backyard?"
"Hmph, you're no fun, Hotaru!", Naruto complained over my lack of enthusiasm.
"Enough with the chit-chat already. Let's get started. Do you want to train with us or do you want to practice on your own?"
I put the radio I brought along and tune my radio signals to play out Metal Gear Rising boss music.
"Eh, you go train on your own. I'm just going to refine my Kenjutsu."
((((((Sasuke POV))))))
Sometimes, Sasuke wonders if Hotaru is part Nara.
Not in the brain parts, mind you. Hotaru had proved over and over again that he makes terrible life decisions and it's a miracle he has not dropped dead already.
He means in the laziness part.
Sasuke can see how much of a monstrous talent Hotaru has when he puts his mind into it. Before he awakens The Raiju bloodline, Sasuke had barely able to keep him off in Taijutsu spars back when they were in Class F. He had won mostly because Hotaru will run out of chakra to keep up his defense.
After Hotaru awakened the Raiju, despite it was due to stupidity, Sasuke admit he would prefer not to engage against Hotaru in Taijutsu without wrapping himself in rubber armor. That Raijin Fist is no joke. With minimal contact, it screws you over, sending electrical signals into your very nerves and jammed your brain control over your body. In spars, Hotaru had kept it without the electrical functions. Otherwise it's just impossible to train with him.
Unless I complete my Lightning Armor, Sasuke thought to himself.
He doesn't know if it's just Hotaru being stupid as usual or it's a sign of trust, but Hotaru says all they need to do is just make a form of chakra armor over their body to defend against Raijin Fist. Wind Armor will be the best defense against it. Which is what Naruto had been trying to make ever since Hotaru revealed it. It was weird that Hotaru just casually drop it's counter when Naruto complained over how unfair Raijin Fist is.
Sasuke thinks it's because it doesn't really matter for Hotaru anyway, since out of nowhere he just come and reveal he's going to be a swordsman now.
Sasuke view during his quick rest as Hotaru decimates a bunch of Rock Automatons, constantly generated by a seal that is kept by his clan since the Founding of Konoha.
Dark Slayer, the Kenjutsu style Hotaru said the name of the style was. Something about recreating Vergil's moveset, he claims. He doesn't know who Vergil is. Probably yet another of Hotaru's imagined character for his mangas. Though he said he used the principals of MGS' Jetstream Sam sword as his basis. Using electromagnetism for lightning speed quick draws and High Frequency vibration to cut through anything like butter.
Sasuke hopes Hotaru will never be his enemy. His Uchiha Pride dictates there's no way he will lose to Hotaru. Common sense dictates that's just stupid. And no one gets away being stupid except Hotaru.
Naruto says heck yeah so awesome! Hotaru says wait till he can replicate Judgement Cut End. Whatever that is.
Anyway, Sasuke shamelessly copies the style with Sharingan, however it would take years for him to execute Raijin Fist and Dark Slayer at true proficiency. The chakra control requirements for both are insane. Sasuke can mimic the electrocution aspect of Raijin First, but he couldn't precisely use it to target nerves directly. His version is just a regular taser version of the Taijutsu.
And he couldn't make head and tails to use do the QuickDraw function of Dark Slayer. How the hell do you use Lightning chakra to manipulate magnets?! And how the hell magnet catapults steels?!! Isn't magnets supposed to stick to steels, not repel them?!!
Forget that. He still doesn't know how Raijin Arrow works. Sasuke just can't see how lightning control translates to flicking steel chips faster than sound by at least 3 times the speed.
Hotaru said he should be able to do it too. Sasuke thinks it's impossible, but Hotaru insist he can. If he still can't figure it out, then it's just skill issue.
"Holy shit, I think Hotaru just figured out how to teleport!", Naruto exclaimed.
Ah great, he can teleport now, apparently.
Maybe this is why the gods made Hotaru stupid, lazy and stuck in his head most of the day. The world will not be able to handle Makoto Hotaru that's actually motivated and focussed.
((((((((((Hotaru POV))))))))))
Body Flicker Technique is weird.
The fanfics I read can't decide if it's a form of teleportation or just ninjas going really fast.
Now, I can't do the usual Body Flicker. Having no neutral chakra and all that. But to be Vergil you need to teleport and stuff, so I apply what fanon I know about Body Flicker and teleportation theory, and how to do it with lightning.
So I figure, I just turn my whole body into lightning, shoot it from A to B across quantum physics, turn lightning back to myself and voila, teleportation.
I pretty sure I just give a lot of physicist's brain cancer and stroke over my solution to teleportation to being, electron goes brrrrr.
Well, I can only do that trick once tho. Low amount of chakra and all that. It would be a long time until I get to spam teleportation like Yondaime.
Or maybe it won't be that long until Naruto finished that Power Cell Seal project of his. Which should be 2 or 3 months to complete.
And I would get a Made by Uzumaki seal for free. Heh.
"thanks for the hotpot, Mikoto ba-chan!" Naruto thanked the interim clan chief of Uchiha.
"Oh it's fine, Naruto-kun. It's the least I can do for my lil Sasuke friends!"
Sasuke grunted his embarrassment.
I wonder when Mikoto going to tell Naruto that she was BFF with his mom. At least that's what fanon told me.
I wordlessly picked all the used dishes and brought it to the sinks, and starts washing them.
"Oh you don't need to do that, Hotaru-kun. I'll wash the dishes later." Mikoto says.
"We have a deal, ma'am. You let me eat here and I'll share some kitchen expense and wash the dishes."
Mikoto sighed.
When I first came here, I was living off my meager salary by eating plain rice with soy sauce and dried fish everyday. For vegetables, I just munch off dried seaweed.
When Sasuke snitched my perfectly balanced diet to his mom, she had a fit of horror and proceed to force me to eat at her house kicking and screaming.
I settled with the deal with paying my portion of kitchen expense and wash dishes.
"Hurry up Hotaru! Let's play UNO!"
Back when our little…. companionship starts, all we do is training. Training. And more training. I've started losing my mind training when I could have just work or draw, so I decide to fix these two idiot gym bros to do something other than training for once.
Which results to gaming time.
Hah, I wish we have actual video games here. No, we just go around playing actual kids games for once. Spinning tops, marbles, paperboat racing, stuff like that. No secretly it is a ninja training games either.
Just simple, actual kids playing. Life is not all about training.
After I finished the dishes, I went upstairs to Sasuke's room and we start playing UNO. Made the cards myself. We played a few rounds while chitchatting whatever.
"I can't wait for summer to arrives. I'm so bored staying indoors." , Naruto begins yet another of his complain as the winter is cramping on his extrovert instincts.
"meh, summer is overrated. Rainy days and winter is the best.", I jab back.
"that's because you're a weirdo that likes to stay in room then actually living outside. If you're actually rich, I bet we wouldn't see you outside, just drawing until your food supplies ran out.", Naruto rant.
Ain't that the dream? Just staying indoors, not seeing and talk to people. But noooo, I have to socialize to survive.
We live in a society.
"Can't wait for spring to arrive and we go back to school. I want to kick everyone else with my new moves!", Naruto exclaimed.
"I wish there's more real challenger in class. I got tired of beating up Naruto all the time and Hotaru has graduated.", Sasuke add his input.
"Yea. Everyone is so weak. It used to be I found Kiba and Chouji hard to beat, but after we started training with Hotaru, they're just… so weak."
"I thought I will train with the best when I got into A class, but it's turn out everyone was just slackers." Sasuke rant.
That's the thing is canon, was it? Sasuke wasn't actually a prodigy. Sure, he is hella talented but not Itachi level of talented. He actually works hard. He only looks like a genius because everyone else slack off.
Seriously, how the hell no one came up with the various training ideas I came up with? Slippery floors? Use chakra. Too cold and don't have winter clothes? Use chakra. Wanna do cool push-ups? Do a handstand and propel yourself up by bursting chakra out of your palm like a rocket.
And they say I'm stupid.
We keep playing UNO as we shit on the Killer Toddler Academy education system.
Hah. This is pretty nice. Life is good. It's going to be a nice simple life from now on.
)))))))))
Sakura trees are in full bloom.
Birds are singing. Bees are buzzing. The sun is shining with smooth warmth.
"Makoto Hotaru! You will reveal the secrets of Raijin Fist or you will face dire consequences for your crime against the Hyuuga clan!"
I breathe in the nice floral breeze of the Hyuuga Estate garden, despite the many ropes tied around me really cramping my lungs.
You know what, Hyuuga clan is really good at landscaping.
Life is good.