A Place For Everything

Written for the Toilet Dreams and Leaf Machines event on Morsmordre.

A/N: Here we go again, another story inspired by real events. Because my family be silly like that. :3

Grindelwald was jealous of his older sister Modesty. She got to do all the fun stuff, like baking cookies with their mother and going to school. But every time he wanted to help out in the kitchen, the silver haired toddler was promptly ejected from the room.

Of course it didn't help that he wanted to shove his pants in everything. And no matter what anyone told the mischievous toddler, Grindelwald still thought his pants should be the main ingredient in his mother's sugar cookies.

Things only got worse when Barty started bringing home boxes of chocolate snack cakes for Modesty to bring with her to school. Little Grindelwald wanted some, and he cried and wailed when Barty explained that they were just for Modesty.

His brother Severus couldn't have cared less, so long as he had his cheesy crackers. But Grindelwald wanted chocolate cake, and he wanted it now. No one was going to tell him he couldn't have any.

One evening, while his parents were watching a movie in the living room, Grindelwald snuck out of bed and tiptoed into the kitchen. He opened the cupboard and removed a box of chocolate snack cakes. But he had to be quiet about it, or else his parents might hear him opening the wrapper.

But wait, where would he hide the wrappers? He could try stuffing them behind the cereal boxes, or in his father's bag of Yodeler Oats that he had for breakfast every morning, though he doubted that would serve as a sufficient hiding place.

He pondered the predicament while he ate, one chocolate cake disappearing after the other, until he had a growing pile of plastic wrappers on the floor.

"If I was kangawoo I'd have pockets for everyting," he grumbled, making his trademark grumpy kitty face. "Cos girls always getted the good stuffs, wike pockets and cake."

He flicked one of the wrappers across the floor, remembering the mess of crumbs left behind by his brother whenever he was given cheesy crackers. Grindelwald had tried to solve the problem by putting the crumbs down Severus' pants, because all the world's problems could be solved by putting things in your pants or taking your pants off. Or at least that was two-year-old Grindelwald logic.

And so, with nothing else to do, Grindelwald reached around and started stuffing the wrappers into the flap on the back of his footie pajamas. It made such a funny sound, and it felt good when the crinkly material rubbed against his bottom. Grindelwald actually giggled, the plastic tickling his tush, and it was this cheerful noise that gave him away.

The next thing he knew his father had snatched him by the collar and lifted him off the floor, but Grindelwald didn't care. He had a tummy full of cake and a tickly feeling in his rear, which made him very happy.

"Young man, are you even listening to me?" Barty spat in annoyance, his son covering his mouth with both hands and laughing.

He looked at the discarded box on the floor, seeing that it was almost empty. But the incriminating evidence had been shoved down the back of his son's pajamas, so he wasn't sure how many of them had been consumed.

"You haven't been eating your sister's snacks, have you?" asked Barty, his son giggling and squirming. It was clear that this child wasn't going to give him the answers he was looking for. "Alright then. I'm taking you back to bed. But if I find out that you've been taking things that don't belong to you, there will be trouble, mister."

"Okay, daddy," Grindelwald chirped, still smiling at his adoptive parent.

All was well until Barty shifted his hold on the toddler, positioning him against his chest as he bent to pick up the box. That was when the buttons on the back of Grindelwald's footie pajamas came undone, and a flurry of wrappers fluttered onto the kitchen floor.

"Oh course," Barty said with a sigh. "Should've known the little imp would shove everything where the sun doesn't shine."

"Daddy," Grindelwald cooed, plucking a wrapper from his pajamas and offering it to his father. "Do you want some? Dis one still has chocolate on it."

He said this so innocently and sweetly, but his father was not amused.

Barty practically dropped the toddler, who went into a renewed fit of giggles while clinging to his father's jacket. "Alessia!" Barty hollered. "Oh, for Merlin's sake! Get that out of my face right now, you little twit!"