bored411: Ahhhh. You smell that? Angst.
Lillyannp: Thank you! I'm very excited to be writing about it and sharing it with you guys.
Guest: As High School Musical teaches us: "We're all in this together." Thank you!
UnicornPhoenix: Oh, honey, no! Becoming worried on the wellbeing of a fictional character is what fanfiction is built upon! Lol but thank you very much!
infinityneverlasts: Actually, no! I'm sorry if it came off like that, I hadn't realized how dark hair + glasses would probably imply that it was. It was just a random guy in the group, the token "good one." Sorry about that!
Kosuke keeps her promise. She does not go on any more dates.
She just can't forget about the Blue Suit. She has twice had nightmares about him. In the first, he attacks her like a wild animal, and Kosuke's screams for help are met with sneers by the fancily-dressed people that pass by them. In the second, someone possesses Kosuke's body and agrees to go home with him. She woke up from both unable to breathe.
It's probably an overreaction on her part…but she has to be careful, doesn't she? All of her fears and concerns before were probably overreactions, too, but overreactions that were validated in the end.
So this means that all she got out of so much stressing and sweating was one week of the loan shark's debt. She has changed nothing. Nothing whatsoever. Weeks pass, each one another chunk of their money gone down the drain. Naturally, there are other costs, too. Gas, electricity, water, food. So it is much, much worse.
Kosuke wants to say she has other stuff to worry about, but she doesn't. This isn't just for her, it's for Minami and Hitsuji, too. Kosuke can't waste a second lamenting her woes when she has her siblings to care for. Not only does she have to keep cooking their meals and keep them safe, she has to be happy and welcoming for them—she's all they have, and they're all she has.
Family-wise, anyway. It's pretty solidified now that the two Fujiokas and Tamaki aren't letting her go anytime soon. In the month or so that's passed since that "visit with her friends", Haruhi and Ranka have already visited again. Kosuke wouldn't be able to be there for Haruhi's birthday proper, so she gives it to her then: a pair of cooking mitts with bear paws and a comfy oversized T-shirt, perfect for pajamas. Just the fact that buying her best friend a gift made Kosuke nervous for her wallet says…a lot. She says nothing, however, especially when Haruhi wraps her in a hug and thanks her.
(Minami and Hitsuji draw her a picture of her riding a dragon. Haruhi is amazed.)
They keep up their calls and text messages, and for as location-distant as their friendship is, Haruhi (she has come to learn) is a very observable person. So much so that over text, she can tell that something is wrong. Kosuke has re-read their conversations time and time again and cannot for the life of her figure out what she's saying that gives it away. If all Kosuke says is Getting new clothes for Minami, she's outgrowing them, how does Haruhi ask, You've been doing a lot lately, are you sure you're not tired?
She gets her answer when she really looks back and sees that any time Haruhi asks what she's doing, it's always a job or chore of some sort.
Kosuke just can't stop to rest. Not even when she has most definitely fallen sick.
Minami and Hitsuji have both gotten sick a few times, fevers and colds and the occasional bugs. Thankfully none have been so serious as to go to the doctor; they've been remedied with some good soup and medication. Kosuke has dodged a bullet by not falling ill in such a critical position. Headaches and stomachaches, of course, but not the kind of sick that confines you to bed.
Until the day after Haruhi's birthday. The second Kosuke wakes up that morning, she realizes she's in for hell.
She forces herself to get up and take medication for the pounding headache. There's an ache between her shoulders and down her back. Her fatigue has been multiplied by a dozen—blinking takes an effort. Even better, it's a weekend, and that means no school, and that means Hitsuji and Minami are supposed to get her full attention.
"Let's play dolls!" "Okay, come on."
"Kos'ke, puzzle! Let's do a puzzle!" "Coming, buddy."
"'M hungry, can I have a snack?" "Sure, hang on."
Kosuke gets up and sits down and tries very, very hard to ignore the dizziness that sweeps over her every time she moves. She takes her temperature and yes, it's a little high, but she doesn't have time to focus on it before she has to help the kids set up a movie to watch. Medicine keeps the headaches at bay, but not much else.
So her final solution is to whip up some soup, but her phone goes off as she's getting the onion and celery cooked. "Minami, can you bring me my phone?"
"Yeah." Little feet pad across the floorboards. "It's Haruhi. Can I answer?"
"Sure."
"Hey, Haruhi…Uh-huh…She's making soup…No, she's sick…"
Kosuke starts flailing, waving, even shaking her hands together to beg her to stop, but Minami is too caught up in phone-call-land to even notice. "She's been taking medicine but she's kind of slow…No…Okay."
The phone is passed to her at last. She doesn't even get a hello.
"Are you sick?"
"I just have a little fever, that's all."
"How much?"
"Hundred. I'm making soup—"
"Soup isn't medicine. Have you taken medicine?"
"Yes!"
"Is it working?"
"It's going to take a little while for it to kick in, Haruhi. I'm fine, I promise."
"Is it just a fever?"
"Uh…"
"Kosuke."
"I have a headache. I'm dizzy."
"Does your throat hurt?"
"Barely."
"So yes."
"Barely!"
"Kosuke, you need to go see a doctor and get a prescription."
"Oh, come on." Kosuke pops a cap off the broth bottle and pours, the phone wedged between her cheek and her shoulder. "It's not that bad."
"It's going to get a lot worse if you don't do something about it."
Kosuke can see Minami watching from the corner of her eye. "I don't need a doctor."
For maybe the first time in all their friendship, Haruhi's voice takes on a sharpness at her. "Kosuke, you're my friend. You know that, so I'm telling you that you're being stupid. I know you think you have to take care of the kids but first you have to take care of yourself."
Kosuke does not argue because that makes too much sense. If she's confined to her bed, unable to move with a pounding headache and restless stomach, then who will take care of Hitsuji and Minami? She hadn't even thought about if she was contagious…
"Will you go see a doctor?"
"Yes. I will go see a doctor."
"Alright." Haruhi's voice softens just so. "Please just be careful. You'll break if you push yourself too hard."
She's right, of course. So Kosuke goes to the doctor, gets a prescription—it's sinuses, of course—and though she has to deal with a throat that gets more sore and fever and headaches, she comes out alright.
But it costs money. Everything costs money, it's so stupid.
She gets a text message from Tamaki later in the day.
Haruhi told me you were sick. Do you need anything at all? Please don't hesitate to let me know.
Kosuke knows the offer is genuine. She knows because Tamaki had asked her, once, if she needed help with money. She'd been talking about not being able to go to college or properly work, and he'd thrown the question at her like a curveball. And Kosuke had said no, that they were fine, their savings would cover them. She doesn't want to say it was pride, but it was definitely something. The told herself that the first time she agrees to take unearned money, it'd be the first sign of hopelessness, that all will be lost.
It's already feeling hopeless, though, and for that reason Kosuke realized that that might have been a very, very stupid decision on her part.
She doesn't want to ask for money. She doesn't want to use Tamaki like an ATM. She wants to take care of this herself, but maybe what she does and doesn't want is of no importance in such dire constraints. Tamaki had offered her salvation on a silver platter. And when she figured out that it was okay to take up the offer, just this once for the sake of her family, it was too late. The loan shark had come and maimed the silver platter in its teeth.
Even if she could work up the spine to ask Tamaki for that much money, she feared that she would be putting him in danger. If she just gave the shark all the money at once, he'd smell blood in the water, find out about her wealthy friend, and sieze the opportunity. Maybe threaten her family even more so she would keep a steady flow coming.
Kosuke does not hate every part of her life. She has a wonderful best friend, and two more friends because of that. She has the two best little siblings anyone could ask for. She has a roof over her head and a bed to sleep in. She has a job and can cook good food. She's still capable of feeling happiness and laughing, she's not just a walking embodiment of grief and sadness.
The simple fact, however, is that there are a lot of factors her personal feelings aren't going to mask or make up for. She cannot go to college to get a job-earning education. Their money is declining and her job is not helping. She has to pay a debt to a loan shark who has threatened her and her family. Life itself is full of a lot of curveballs and each one is another punch to their bank account.
She can ask for advice, sure, but not help. Kosuke has spent eighteen years of her life completely dependent on her parents and she was never thankful for any of it. She was told time and again to prepare herself and actually be an adult and she never listened, so this is her punishment. This serves her right, however unfair it all is.
Kosuke…
She misses her parents.
She wants to say time has dulled the pain, but…not really, no.
She needs their guidance and wisdom and she just doesn't have it. At the same time, if they could come back without changing anything about their financial standing, Kosuke would be happy. She'd be so much happier than she'd ever felt before.
She and her mother had drifted a bit in their last few years together. Emiko had made it very clear that as much as she loved her daughter, she loathed her habits and laziness. No doubt she'd wanted to throttle Kosuke at least once. At minimum, Emiko was aware—and made it known that she was aware—that her daughter was rather pathetic. The embodiment of wasted potential. Whereas her two younger siblings had been showered in praise and affection, Kosuke got occasional hugs and brief smiles.
The revelation of what Marti had done had changed her perception of him a bit. She'd never even thought that their financial situation could be so dire, so the idea that her father would not have told them about it was incomprehensible. Had he even told Emiko, she wonders? Marti had either been desperate or naïve or foolish or something—he was not stupid, but…Come on! What made him think that what he did was okay? Did it ever cross his mind what he would be doing to his family if something happened to him?
None of this means that Kosuke doesn't still love them and miss them.
She misses Emiko's biting sarcasm, her stone-hard stubbornness, the fact that she always seemed to know what to do at every single moment. She misses Marti's ease of everything, his almost permanent smile, his unfaltering tenderness.
Even moreso, she misses going with Marti on trips to the grocery store, or silently reading a book on the opposite end of the couch with her mother. Birthdays and Christmases. Normalcy. It's the memories that hurt the most, really. Especially the ones from long, long ago, of her mother carrying her to bed when she fell asleep, of Marti helping her ride a bike for the first time.
Minami and Hitsuji no doubt feel the same pain. They've both cried on seemingly random days because of course they do. The reminder of what they've lost sometimes just hits out of nowhere. Kosuke lets them sob about how much they miss Mommy or Daddy and refuses to cry herself. She's positive that will only scare them and make them think that all is lost.
If she could have her old life back, Kosuke would take it in a heartbeat, no matter what she'd have to give up in turn. To just have Emiko and Marti magically walk in like they've been gone on a trip this whole time and slide right back to where they were would literally be a dream come true. Kosuke has had many dreams of her parents and the worst are always the ones where they are still alive. In the moment, those dreams are wonderful. She feels the warmth of them as she hugs them close. They are real and alive. Then she wakes up and remembers.
This is how life works now. Kosuke can't go back in time. Her only choice is to keep going and be strong, so she has to do that, even if she doesn't have a single idea what she's going to do.
The next time that a man in a suit comes to her doorstep, both the children are at school and Kosuke is coming home from grocery shopping. It is early March, the end of the school year just around the corner. Kosuke has prepared herself for the change in schedule with both the kids being home all day.
He is wearing a dark gray suit, and his hair is pale blonde—that's all she notices at first, standing so far away. For a moment, she's terrified, because she thinks it has to be from the loan sharks…but she's been paying the money. Do they want more? How is she going to give them more?
She keeps walking despite the panic, and when he hears her footsteps, he turns. Kosuke falters in her steps, because—something on him is throwing her off. Unlike the loan shark, nothing on him outwardly screams trouble. He is a perfectly normal-looking man, handsome even, maybe in his early forties. His blonde hair is trimmed neatly, and he has prominent crow's feet at his bright blue eyes. He is not familiar at all, and yet Kosuke feels like he should be, somehow.
He also pauses when he sees her, making an expression she can't read. He straightens his shoulders but doesn't smile, just nodding at her and asking, "Are you Kosuke Nakahara?"
"Yes." Kosuke stops halfway between him and the gate she still hasn't replaced. It seems a safe distance. "Can I help you?"
"No—in fact, I am here to help you."
Kosuke's brows knit together. "Are you from the bank?"
"No."
"Social services?"
"No. I'm not from any sort of organization." He reads her unease at once. "I'm going to stay here, if that makes you any more comfortable. I won't move until you tell me."
Kosuke does not answer. She is too busy asking herself what the freaking odds are that she is having to deal with yet another creep trying with a motive.
"Kosuke, I am aware that you and your siblings are in a very precarious position right now."
Wary but also maybe just a little hopeful: "Are you with the police?"
"No—I told you, no organization."
"A…private investigator, then?"
This time his eyes narrow at her with impatience. She decides that it has to be his eyes that is unsettling her so much. For some reason. "Is there something less than legal going on?"
Guess not. "No. I'm just trying to figure out how you know who I am."
"I assure you, I'm not here to hurt you or cause you any more trouble than you're already dealing with. I'm here to help you. I know who you are because I knew your mother."
Well, Kosuke's heard that one before, and it ended with a broken gate and a shattered store window. She's already taking a step back toward the street. "Tell me something about her, then. Prove it."
He doesn't seem surprised or bothered. "Her name was Emiko. She liked to read horror novels and she had a scar on her elbow from an accident when she was a child."
Well then.
Kosuke doesn't know whether she's more at ease or unease. Neutrality is the best she can manage. "Alright. What, exactly, do you want?"
The man clasps his hands in front of him. "I am here to make you an offer. It is a very large one, not to be taken lightly, but it will benefit you and your siblings a hundred times over."
"A business deal?"
"Almost."
"I'm going to need you to start being a little less mysterious."
"I'd rather explain this somewhere more private, if we could?"
Kosuke is nearly convinced, if only to talk inside, but she has one more question. "How did you know my mother?"
The man sighs, very impatient now, as if he expected it to take so long but didn't like it all the same. A look at his watch, and he levels his gaze on Kosuke, speaking firmly:
"Your mother and I used to be married. I'm your father."
Then Kosuke realizes what the problem was: she'd seen his eyes every time she looked in the mirror.
The subject of Kosuke's father had always been one carefully avoided with her mother. Same as her grandparents.
For all of her childhood, it was just the two of them, hopping from apartment to apartment, school to school. A mother-daughter duo trying to find a home. Kosuke knew that she was supposed to have a father, because whenever she saw pictures of families, there was always a mommy, a daddy, and the children. So when she was young and asked, "Where's my daddy?" Emiko would answer, "He's not around." If she asked why, Emiko would just hush her.
As she grew older, Kosuke started getting theories, particularly from her classmates—this boy's parents were divorced, this girl's mother had died. Her curiosity had become frustration. She'd given up on that, though, because her mother had grown angry both times she'd asked for answers. Not just snapping, but snapping so hard Kosuke was driven to tears. "I said we're not talking about it!" Then Emiko had pulled her close and apologized, but didn't answer.
So at some point Kosuke had unhappily accepted that whatever had happened to her father, he wasn't going to be coming back, and it wasn't happy. The last, last, last time she had asked was maybe four years ago. Emiko had tried to dismiss it, the same we're-not-talking-about-it, and Kosuke had finally put her foot down. "I deserve to know what happened! He's my dad!"
For a second, Emiko had flushed with anger, and Kosuke was prepared for quite a fight with plenty of yelling. She could count the number of times she'd raised her voice at her mother on her fingertips, and they all ended in disaster.
Instead, Emiko's face had crumpled, and Kosuke was rendered dumbstruck—she'd never seen her mother look so broken so fast. She had asked her, very simply: "Please don't ask me again."
No, Kosuke didn't take it with loving understanding. She still deserved to know and her mother's sadness didn't invalidate that. She just couldn't, though. Any time she was tempted to after, she just remembered how defeated her mother had looked, and kept it in with the confusion and frustration.
Kosuke's relationship with her mother—as horrible or disrespectful as it might be to say—was not perfect. Even so, she never had the strength to intentionally cause her mother such grief.
Besides, she already had a dad, the best a girl could ask for. Marti came into her life like a knight in shining armor. It was a fairy tale, except that instead of princes marrying princesses, the king had found the little girl that wanted a father more than anything. She remembers when she had just learned that he and Emiko were going to get married, she'd made him a crayon storybook of it. She was expecting some hugs and compliments on her work, not for Marti to weep and hold her for three hours.
When Emiko had died—and Marti too, perhaps. Had Emiko ever told him?—Kosuke had decided that the truth had died with her. No aunts or uncles, no grandparents, no one.
And now Kosuke is sitting across from her father: Shigeo.
Just when she thought her life couldn't get any more bizarre.
She doesn't know what to do, or what to say. There is no guideline for this situation. She'd let him in, sat them at a table, and now they just sit tensely together at the table.
This man—she can't say her dad, because he is just a man—was once married to her mother. He is half of Kosuke's parentage. And yet she has never met him, has never learned his name before, has never had a semblance of what he so much as looked like. Now he is here now, not hugging her close, not offering explanations, but acting more like a businessman in a bothersome meeting.
Kosuke isn't mad, but she isn't happy, and she isn't scared, but she isn't confident. She is somehow feeling so many things that they have cancelled each other out. She is numb.
Shigeo sips at the tea she's poured him. She can't pick up everything, but Kosuke thinks she can see their similarities if she tries. Bright blue eyes apart, she thinks she has his nose, the shape of his ears. Maybe.
"If you have questions, I suppose now would be as good as time as any to ask them."
Kosuke lags like an old computer. She has to work her brain full-throttle just to function properly. Ideas pachinko-ball in her brain, but she settles on the most obvious: "Why haven't you been around?"
Shigeo's lips purse, displeased but not surprised. "I don't intend on going into extensive details of what happened. Simply put, we were married, we divorced, and she left before you were born. She made it very clear I was not to pursue you or her."
So much for that, then. If she ever figures out what happened, it's going to be through her own investigation, apparently. "How long have you known she's been…?"
She does not miss the sadness that glints in his eyes. So perhaps he does care, even a little. "I've been keeping up to date with Emiko since she left—only with what has been publicly available. I know this restaurant was very successful, I know she remarried and had two more children—" Is that a hint of bitterness she detects? "—and I know she and her husband were killed in a car accident."
"So why are you here now?"
He does not answer immediately. There's no telling what his answer will be, but Kosuke is not too sure it'll be anything caring. Nothing he's said or done thus far has implied a fatherly desire to make amends with his long-lost daughter, however tragic the circumstances.
It takes a good minute for him to respond. He runs a hand down his face. He's choosing his words carefully.
"My full name is Shigeo Amida. Does that sound familiar to you?" Kosuke shakes her head. "Has Emiko told you much at all about me?" Kosuke shakes her head again. "Amida Health might not be a household name, but it is a very successful medical technology company. My grandfather started it, but since I took over, I have increased our profits tenfold."
Kosuke just nods along because she doesn't know what else to do. She figures answers are coming.
"I have done some investigating into your situation since…You can tell. I didn't want to cause you any concern so soon after, so it was a matter of this person coming here to ask this person to ask this person about you. So on, so forth. As I've said, I know that the situation that you—and your siblings—are in. I believe that I can help."
Now this is just…too big a pill to choke down.
Just—how on earth is Kosuke supposed to wrap her head around all this?
Her father whom she has never met before, whom she questioned was even alive, is now sitting in front of her for the first time in her life and is offering to help her and her siblings, the children of his ex-wife and her husband.
If Kosuke has ever before wished she could use a pause button in real life, she wants it now more than ever.
She flounders, and it's pathetic, but…what the hell. "I…Just—can we please slow down? I can't…"
Shigeo—the name Kosuke Amida pops into her head like a jumpscare in a horror movie—nods, but looks at his watch all the same. Nothing about him is remotely warm. The fact that her mother was somehow wooed into marrying him is a mystery, but perhaps divorcing him isn't.
Alright, no. Maybe he isn't a horrible person. After all, he's here now, offering his help. Except…Emiko didn't want him anywhere near them…
Kosuke gathers her words together. "My mother…She didn't even tell me your name. She never talked about you, or what happened to you both. You won't tell me either, and you have to understand why the fact that you're now offering so much help on the first day of ever meeting me is weird at best."
"Allow me to clarify something. I am not here to instantly support you or your siblings for the rest of your lives. This is blunt to say, but it must be said: I don't know you, you don't know me. There is no love or trust between us."
She figures she really can't allow her feelings to be hurt, because he is completely right. So she just gestures for him to continue.
"I will, however, support you and your siblings for the rest of your lives—or rather, I will give you the opportunity to do that yourself—if an agreement can be made."
"You said you weren't looking for me to help you."
"Consider this a two-way street."
It is too good to be true; Kosuke isn't stupid or naïve. There is something very fishy going on here and she doesn't have to have experience as a loan shark's prey to know that.
But…
Support for the rest of their lives is good all the same. Greater than good. Out-of-a-dream fantastic, so much so that instead of being swept up in the fantasy, she plants her feed down in reality.
If this is a trap, she will run for the hills, because they can't survive any more damage. If this is real, though, Kosuke will be passing by on a golden opportunity. She has to at least listen, right?
"What is the agreement?"
Shigeo does not smile or even perk up, but he seems a bit pleased somehow. "Next Saturday there will be an event where your attendance will be required. I will provide transportation, and if you need it, proper attire."
She blinks. "To support myself and my siblings for the rest of our lives, I have to…attend a party?"
"No." The look he gives her is an unsaid insult to her intelligence. "This 'party' will lead to the agreement, depending on the outcome."
"What is the outcome?"
"That I cannot tell you."
"What am I going to the party for?"
"That I cannot tell you."
"I am…not comforted by the lack of details."
"I thought you might be. Here is an incentive, if you wish."
He reaches into the breast pocket of his blazer and pulls out a folded envelope. The last time Kosuke took a piece of paper from a suited man, her workplace had its window shattered, so she lets him set it on the table.
"I do need to emphasize that if the outcome needed is not met, the agreement won't happen. I am giving you the opportunity, however."
Kosuke shakes her head. "You're a stranger to me."
"As you are to me."
"My mother didn't want you to come near me."
"That was her choice. This is yours."
Shigeo stands from his chair. Standing there in his prim and proper suit and his unfamiliar face as still as ever, Kosuke just cannot put it into fact that this is her father. The sheer idea of this man telling her bedtime stories, taking her to school, even touching her, is insane at best.
"If you agree, I need to know by next Wednesday at the latest. Sooner, preferably, so we can get you a dress in time. My contact information is in here." He hesitates, considering. "I'm going to ask that you don't take something away from this that wasn't said. I am not asking for your trust, and I'm certainly not hoping to 'build anew', if you will. I am making an offer, you can accept it. That's it."
There could never before have been a man so mysterious. His past, his motives, his plans, they're all unknown, and yet Kosuke is connected to him by blood and is being made a dreamlike offer. She can't say yes or no, she can't thank him or insult him. He is not a person, he is a….question.
"I understand."
Shigeo nods. He leaves. Kosuke's first meeting with her father didn't even last thirty minutes.
In the silence, she spends a minute just to bask in the knowledge of what has happened and is happening. If life decides to throw any more curveballs at her, there's no way Kosuke isn't going to fall down flat.
She opens the envelope, more curious than anything. Inside is a slip of paper with a phone number and e-mail address. There's also a hundred and eight thousand yen.
"You're positive about this?"
"No."
"Then why are you doing this?"
"Because I just feel like I should."
On the other side of the phone, Haruhi lets out a breath, but it isn't really a sigh. This isn't the first time they have talked since Shigeo has come. Kosuke called just later that night. There's just so much to talk about. Haruhi took everything with understanding, but she shared Kosuke's sentiment that this is a lot to take in all at once.
Kosuke took quite a while to just sit on the idea. It isn't that complicated, really, she just had so much else to wade through before she got there. She'd gotten a hundred and eight thousand yen from doing absolutely nothing, so she is fairly certain now that this enigmatic "agreement" had at least a grain of truth to it.
She decided that she would go to the party after realizing that she had nothing to lose. If Shigeo didn't get the results he wanted, that was it—the plan (whatever it is) wouldn't happen, and for all she knew, he was going to go back to wherever he came from. If all went well, however, it was financial stability for the rest of her, Minami, and Hitsuji's lives. A literal dream come true. Kosuke would lose nothing either way.
She had done some research on Shigeo, too. Amida Health is indeed a real company, and it is indeed incredibly successful. Their technology could apparently be found globally in hospitals, from simple scales to incubators to CAT-scanners and even prosthetics. Any mention of him and her mother's marriage, however, was not to be found—understandable, as Kosuke doubted even the biggest gossips would find interest in the marital woes of the owner of a company that, though wealthy, was not a household name. She'd told Haruhi this, but since she'd immediately confused it with "Arima" and forgot what the business was, she guessed the older woman didn't care too much about the specifics.
After calling to say she'd be coming (and telling him her size), Shigeo said her dress would arrive soon—and that her 'stylist' would be coming to her. Kosuke had intended to ask if she could watch over the children once again, but she didn't even get three words out before Haruhi had agreed. Ranka, too, but from what Haruhi relayed to him, he was too infuriated with the idea of a father reappearing in his child's life just for business matters to speak on the phone.
For now, the children are unaware of what is happening, and think that they are with Haruhi so Kosuke can simply have a "night off." Kosuke will have to tell them, of course, if this goes anywhere. With no assurance, though, Kosuke has decided that she will spare them the explanation if she finds it overly complicated.
It is Saturday now. The Fujiokas and the children are at the same pension they stay at every visit. Any minute now, someone will be coming to the door to pretty her up and sweep her out the door to a party she still has yet to know details about.
"You'll call me if something goes sideways, right?"
"Of course. I'll fight my way out of there if I have to."
Haruhi sighs. "It just sounds really…suspicious."
"You don't have to convince me."
"I don't get how you aren't mad about anything. He's been gone for so long and now he's shown up just to strike a deal?"
"I'm not happy, believe me. I don't know why him and Mom divorced, or why he's here, or anything about him, and I'm not going to worry about any of that until I have to. It doesn't affect anything. There's already so much to take care of, so…No need."
"Sure, I guess. You're just very strong to take this all in so easily."
"That's one way of putting it. I guess."
"But you do want to know what happened, right?"
This is the worst thing about this: Kosuke is trusting Shigeo for this to just be a party with no surprises, nothing harmful, everything normal. That's as far as her trust can go, however, because it really sunk in that this is a man her mother didn't want anywhere near her. He could very well be dangerous, and even if he isn't going to lay any hands on her, how would Emiko feel to know that Kosuke was talking to him now, had let him into their home? If she's watching her, is she screaming for her to stop, run away, don't ever talk to him again?
Her energy is almost drained at this point, having to make so many decisions between equally bad choices. Comply with a loan shark, or have her siblings' safety threatened. Go on a compensated date, or just take another chunk from the bank. Do business with the man her mother hated, or pass up a chance to keep her family in stable wealth.
All she can do is cross her fingers and hope this party will result in just that and nothing else.
"Yes, but I've already spent a long time convinced I'd never find out, so I can stomach it."
"You know you can only stomach so much."
"So you remind me." The glint of headlights outside the windows stops Kosuke short. "Hey, I think the people are here. Tell the kids I'm okay and I'll see them later!"
"Be careful," Haruhi reminds her one last time before she hangs up.
It is not 'people', however, but one woman who looks to be the embodiment of haute couture. Face of severe lines, lips a rich purple, blazer with leg-of-mutton sleeves a foot wide. She's wearing pumps with no heels and Kosuke is appropriately terrified. The woman, whoever she is, doesn't spare her so much as a greeting as she struts in with a sleek black case in one hand and a plastic-sheathed dress slung across the other arm.
"Change into the dress first." Her Japanese is fluent, but Kosuke cannot place the accent. She obediently takes the dress, but she makes it only three steps before she barks, "Quickly!" So she whimpers and scampers away.
In the bathroom, she takes the plastic off and…oh no. Kosuke is not going to be able to make it through the evening in this. She felt scared to touch anything in the Blue Tower for fear of it costing more than her life. Now she's going to be going to a party dressed in a lifetime of money.
It is gorgeous, and that is the problem. Mint green in color, floor-length, a straight neckline and elbow-length sleeves. The top is beaded with magical handiwork, the skirt made of whatever the material is that flutters with every step. Kosuke has never worn anything so lovely, or expensive, in all her nineteen years.
She slips it on, though, and it fits like a dream and a nightmare all at once. If she gets a drop of anything on this dress, she will die. That is final.
The stylist is not pleased when she emerges, and explains—or shouts, really—that there are apparently rules when it comes to wearing dresses like these. You could lift the skirt just a bit to walk, but only with one hand unless you were going downwards, and never higher than the ankle. No slouching whatsoever. Finally (and most surprising), you are not supposed to wear a bra.
She gets shoes, white heels that are simple enough not to freak her out, though she knows they also cost a fortune. She gets little pearl earrings, but specifically no necklace, because the neckline of the dress apparently highlights the slope of her neck enough…or something.
The last time to ever give Kosuke a makeover was Okina, and Kosuke distinctly remembers her being…not-painful.
"Your handiwork is pathetic." The stylist is talking about her eyebrows, because while Kosuke does keep them plucked and trimmed, she apparently does not do it right. "You have caterpillars on your forehead."
She is blushed and eyeshadowed and mascaraed at lightning speed. Kosuke is not against makeup at all, but she keeps it to mascara, blush, and lip gloss at most. She's never before worn makeup that didn't feel cakey or thick, or lipstick that didn't smudge off on every cup lip. The stylist is as professional as they come, however, because other than the flutter of her eyelashes against her cheeks, Kosuke feels just the same.
(The stylist wants to try eyeliner, but when Kosuke's eyes water, she gets berated for her lack of a spine. No eyeliner.)
Her hair is curled so quickly Kosuke is almost positive she'll get burned, but she escapes unharmed. She wants a mirror, if only out of curiosity, but is denied. There is no time. Kosuke cannot deny that in the dress and the jewelry and everything, she feelslike a polished penny. It's probably stupid, but she can't deny it. At the same time, she'd feel a lot better if she knew that the hell she's getting polished for.
"Do you touch your eyes often?" Kosuke shrugs. "If you feel tempted to do so, imagine your fingers will be chopped off."
That is the stylist's definition of a goodbye. If Kosuke is Cinderella getting dressed up for the ball, that is the craziest version of a fairy godmother she could come up with.
Three seconds after the stylist ducks into her car (as expensive as everything else), a real, honest limousine pulls up on the road. A limousine. Kosuke knew that they were real things, of course, but it never crossed her mind that she would ever ride in one. The road in front of her house isn't very big, and even though Kosuke's neighbors are not right next door to her, she wonders if she's going to be town gossip after this.
The limousine door opens apparently all on its own. Kosuke gets the message: time to go, move your feet. She locks up the building behind her and tip-toes oh soooo carefully to the vehicle, determined not to let the skirt so much as breathe against the ground.
The inside is as pristine and sleek as she expected, and Shigeo himself is no different. His suit is gray, but his tie is a bright sapphire blue. His cufflinks alone probably cost Kosuke three weeks of work. For some reason, Kosuke feels more unnerved now than she did their first meeting. She'd probably been too naïve not to be more wary.
"We need to discuss some things before we arrive," Shigeo says without letting her say a word. "I'm going to trust you to behave in a respectable way. Be polite. Mind your volume. Don't pull away from anyone, but try not to seek anyone out, either. If someone asks you about something you don't know about, change the subject or do your best. Just don't look stupid."
Kosuke swallows. "What kind of things will they ask about?"
"People that you don't know and business developments you've never heard of."
When Kosuke was younger, and had to go to a new school, her teachers would sometimes give her tests to assess her intelligence level—was she below, on par, or exceeding? Some questions were ones she had no inkling about, formulas and equations she'd never seen, which was the point. She wasn't expected to know the answers. She'd still felt a bit dumb for not knowing them, however, and she can only guess that this is the exact feeling that she's about to get for the next…however many hours this is going to take.
The drive will be a long one, maybe an hour depending on the traffic. Kosuke sits there in the posh limousine in her posh dress sitting next to her posh father she'd met a little over a week ago. She has to choke down the questions to her sanity—What are you doing? Get out now! You can't trust him!—because she's already this far.
Still, she's decided that she needs to be more careful, ask more questions. Maybe if she'd been firmer, she wouldn't be paying off a debt, or been grabbed by the Blue Suit.
She breaks the silence like physical glass, but keeps her eyes ahead. She only spares him a glance from the corner of her eye. "I need to understand why you're doing this."
He checks his shining gold watch. "I thought I've already told you."
"No, not really. You said you aren't going to tell me what happened between you and Mom."
"Indeed, I did."
I'll find out eventually. "You've also said you're not here to make a relationship that never happened." He says nothing, so she continues, "So I need some details about why you've come to me now, why I am coming to this party, and the 'agreement' that should be coming out of this."
The blink that's the only movement on his face is very annoyed. "I'd hoped that that envelope would keep you from panicking."
She doesn't miss the biting insult to that. She keeps her voice even. "That envelope convinced me that that this party, and your offer, are real. It didn't answer any other questions."
The silence is not of a man who has been convinced. It is the silence of a man who is very frustrated and maybe regretting doing this to begin with. Kosuke doesn't give him any sympathy.
"I am here—" He says it so slowly. I am heeeeere, like she's too slow for him to talk any faster. "—because for the first time in almost twenty years, the circumstances of mine and Emiko's divorce is affecting aspects of my company. I've tried to keep it a private matter, but it was easier said than done. As far as the people attending this event know, your very existence is something I have only been made aware of after Emiko's passing. I have reached out to you to offer some mentorship and possible heirdom."
Kosuke doesn't even get to let that sink in, because Shigeo continues, "Which may or may not be true, depending on how this night ends." He pauses. "I don't know every detail of your life, but I'm going to guess that what you'll be seeing tonight is a world with norms and rules you've never had to meet. In this world, your business, no matter how big or how small, is vulnerable to your relations. Your relations are vulnerable to every aspect of your life, from your personality to your past and especially your family."
She swallows down each word carefully. She can't let herself get overwhelmed again, even if more questions are popping up left and right. "If that's the case, why bring me into this at all? You could have gone on as if I didn't exist."
"I can't tell you any details about that. Just know it has to do with the desired outcome."
Shigeo finally looks over at her, clearly challenging her to ask anything else.
"If we don't reach the 'desired outcome'—whatever it is—then what you said, about supporting myself and my siblings for the rest of our lives, is void." It's not a question, so Shigeo doesn't deny it. "If that happens, where do you go from there? The whole thing about mentorship and heirdom is going to fall apart if I just disappear."
Turns out, her father is prideful to the point of hypocrisy. After dripping his explanation in condescension, making it clear in his tone he wanted her to just obey his words and ask no questions, he visibly darkens after she points this out. Kosuke will admit that she just meant to explain her question, but seeing his eyes narrow at her just so, she doesn't back down.
"The story will then be that you declined everything and returned to your life as it was."
However biting he sounds, Kosuke has to assume he hasn't posed any extreme lies as of yet. He'd said the mentorship and heirdom were maybe's, and by what he'd told her their first meeting, he might have only learned about her existence through his own investigations. She'd choose her mother over this stranger any second, but that was quite a detail to hide. If this doesn't work out, then the story of her declining his offers is sensible at least.
She needs this to work out, though. Unless she is looking down the barrel of a gun, Kosuke has decided that she cannot in good conscience turn down this opportunity. She'll never have to worry about loan sharks, compensated dates, insurance, bills, or taxes ever again…or at least, she'll worry about them a lot less.
At the same time, she knows she needs to be realistic. If she puts all her hope into this, she'll be left stupid and railing if it doesn't come to fruition. Hopeful but realistic, that's the way to go.
Shigeo adds one last detail. "If I need to say this, you're not to mention anything about your siblings or their father."
For the first time, his voice takes on a threat. Kosuke cannot read minds, but she can read words and body language. This isn't just about overcomplicating a story already wrapped in lies: he might not say it point-blank, but Shigeo does not like the idea of her siblings. He does not like the idea of their father. He very much does not like the idea that the wife that fled from him remarried to another man and had children with him on top of the one Shigeo had fathered.
Perhaps some of his bitterness is excused. Perhaps not. Fact of the matter is, Kosuke does not trust him any more than she has at the start of all this. He might be bound to her by blood, but he's a stranger, not family. He is not here to care for her, he's here for his own benefit. She can deal with that; she just has to be careful.
So she answers, agreeing but not submissive, "I won't."
The rest of the ride is silent.