Chapter 8

Santana walked back into her living room. Alex was leaned back staring at her ceiling. The older blonde had her glasses off, in her left hand, and was pinching the bridge of her nose with her right. San didn't say anything as she sat down. She was going to wait for Alex. She figured that Quinn and Liv were going to talk, too. It was her past and her present merging. She knew she couldn't stop it, but she thought about what Quinn told her. She needed to take back her control and Santana had come back into the room.

"San."

"Alex."

"Where are Liv and Quinn?" Alex questioned.

"Probably talking about me and my crazy past."

"You wanna tell me what's going on with you?" Alex inquired.

"No, I don't, but I think I need to. Quinn told me that it will help me take back control of my life. I know she's right, but its hard to talk about it."

"I know it is, but she's right. Getting it all out will help you start to heal and move on. It could also help with the case. I don't want to push, Santana. I know how strong you are. I know how much pressure you put on yourself. This wasn't because of you, though," Alex told her.

"I know."

"So, I want you to feel comfortable. I want to help you, but I only want you to tell me what you feel comfortable telling. If you remember something, that's great, but if you don't, it's okay, too," Alex stated. "You suffered a horrible trauma, San. I know that it is gonna take a while to get back to some semblance of normal."

"Fuck normal."

Alex laughed. She knew what Santana meant. She also knew that as long as Santana was bringing her brashness and sarcastic wit out that she was on her way to taking back her control. That was one thing that Santana wouldn't and couldn't survive without: her control. The man might have raped her, but Santana wasn't about to let him know he didn't control her. She was going to take back her control, kicking and screaming if she has to. Santana wasn't going to let him control her life anymore. She was standing up to her attacker. She wasn't going to do any less than the victims that she went to bat for in the courtroom. Now, it was her turn.

"Normal is boring," Santana added.

"It can be, yes."

"You're the one handling the case, right?" Santana questioned.

"Yeah, Jack is letting me handle it. Finn and Liv are handling the investigation. Barba doesn't know what's going on. We are keeping it in house and on a need to know basis. He doesn't need to know. Melinda also processed your kit. It was run as Jane Doe number 1217. She is the only one who knows that you are that Jane Doe. Beyond that, she only knows the basics of the case," Alex explained.

"Good."

"What do you need to tell me, Santana?" Alex inquired.

She was about to tell Alex when Liv and Quinn came back into the living room. Liv sat by Alex and Quinn sat by Santana. They didn't miss Santana leaning into Quinn's touch. The younger blonde reached down and held her hand.

"It's okay, San. You can tell her. We've got you. We've all got you," Quinn reminded her. "Even Berry."

"I know. Thank you for that. I really appreciate it. I do and Quinn will tell you how much it is taking me to admit it. I don't like asking for help or admitting when I'm wrong. In fact, I know I'm a bitch. I like power. I like to use my power and that's why I like being a lawyer so much. Being a DA and getting to nail the bad guys helps me feed that, you know," Santana told them.

"Yeah," Liv answered. "We know."

There was a hint of teasing and understanding in her voice. The look that she gave Santana was nothing short of supportive. Alex wanted to reach out to her but held back. Instead, she held Liv's hand and gave Santana a warm smile, hoping it would let her Latina protege know that she was fully supported, snark and all.

"I can't escape the truth anymore. I can't lie to myself anymore. Like you've all told me: I'm not broken just bent a little. I know I can come back from this. I will come back from this. I refuse to allow him anymore control over, but I know that I'm going to need a good lawyer," Santana stated.

"Why is that?" Alex questioned as she leaned forward on the couch.

"Because when that bastard raped me...he...he...he..." Santana tried to tell them but she just couldn't.

"It's okay, San," Quinn told her. Reaching up, she turned Santana's face to hers. Making Santana look her in the eyes, she asked gently, "Do you want me to say it?"

Santana just nodded. Quinn pulled her head into her shoulder and held her. It was not a foreign gesture between them. It just wasn't something that they did a lot and it showed. Santana had never really been "touchy-feely" except with Quinn and Brittany, but mostly with Britt. Over the years, though, they had both done their share of consoling. It had never been this hard though. It was usually San comforting Quinn, except in the weeks following San and Britt's divorce. This was on a whole other level, understandably.

"She's pregnant," Quinn stated, still holding her close.

"That's why you wanted the name of a local clinic?" Alex asked.

"Yes, I want to confirm it. She took three tests already and they were all positive. I want to see a positive on paper from a doctor. Not sure if that will help your case or not, but it will make her face everything. She needs to see it on paper from a medical professional. I'm not going to leave her, either way," Quinn told them. "I owe her that much. Besides, I'm moving here anyway. I'm not going to let her do this alone."

"She won't be alone," Liv added.

"I know that, Liv. But, I was for the most part and as a teen mom," Quinn stated. "I'll take her to the clinic. I'm going to make sure that she calls and goes to see your friend Huang. The only problem I can foresee is Berry. She's gonna go 'all in' for Santana. It's just what she does. I can't blame her for that. She's been there for all of us, and God knows we've never done anything to deserve it. She's a saint with an awesome set of pipes."

"She is," Alex replied.

"Look. Santana's my best friend and has been since grade school. If you need me to do anything to help her, call me. ASAP. Berry's good in a pinch, but the girl doesn't always live in the real world."

Santana rolled her head out and looked a little at Alex. She could see the pain in the older blonde's eyes. She knew it wasn't pity. There was some sadness for the pain and trauma that Santana had suffered, but most of it was anger, pure and righteous anger. Santana knew that look, but this was the first time that it was directed at her. Alex had shown her that giving a little empathy towards the victims made them want to testify more. Plus it didn't hurt to have Olivia Benson on your side, either.

"Things are moving along with the case, San. We're going to get him and I'm going to put him behind bars for as long as I can," Alex promised.

"I know," Santana whispered.

"San, we are going to do this at your pace," Alex reassured her.

"I know. I appreciate it, but honestly, I just want this to be over, too. I know that it is going to take time. But, if I'm pregnant, I don't want to be in court. I don't want to put more stress on the baby then there already is going to be because of how they came into existence."

"I understand," Alex told her. "I don't want that either."

"So, what can we do to make that happen?"

"I'll talk to Jack about your work load. I'm going to step up and take some off of your plate, too. I need you to focus on getting better and taking care of the baby. If we can settle out of court, I'll do that, but I need you to work with Liv, Fin, and me to see what we can push. I'm not doubting your story in the slightest, San, but you know better than anyone what the defense might try," Alex stated.

"I do."

"So let me do what I can," Alex pleaded with her.

"She will," Quinn answered for her.

"We are going to keep this in house as possible, but you know that it might get out. I want you to think of a plan for us to put into place and a statement to be released if it becomes necessary. Also, if you are pregnant and decide to keep the baby..."

"I am," San stated emphatically and Quinn held her tighter.

"Okay. Then we need to think about the child and how we can protect it. You sexuality is going to be an issue and become public knowledge. I know you're out, Santana, but this is going to be a big deal, especially with the baby," Alex told her. "I'm going to start looking up case law to see what will help us. I don't want you stressing about this."

"Easier said than done," San replied.

"I can only guess, because I can't imagine," Alex started and then reached for Olivia's hand. "But, I want you to know that we are here for you, for anything."

"We mean it, San. If we can help you, let us. We're both just a phone call away."

"I know," Santana replied.

"I mean, Santana, even if it is a midnight ice cream run. Call one of us," Alex said.

"I get it. I do. I appreciate it. I do. I'm just..."

"Understandable," Liv replied. "Take your time. Is there anything else that you want to tell us? Anything that you've remembered about it? I don't care small, it might help. But besides that, go see Huang."

"Is that your unbiased opinion?" San asked her.

"I might not like how he handled things with Barba, but he is a good friend. He did what he felt was right, even if it hurt the case. He is a good shrink, San, and a good man. And he worked for the FBI. He understands the law enforcement side of things. It won't hurt to give him a try," Liv told her. "And, let Quinn help while she's here."

"When are you going back to Cambridge?" Alex asked her.

"After this weekend," Quinn stated. "I want to get with Rachel and make sure that San has someone with her. Rachel won't be free until Monday. So, I'll talk to her then and we'll make some plans on me going back and packing to move here. From there, who knows, though."

"I'm not a child," Santana whined.

"No, San, you aren't, but you suffered a horrific trauma and I don't want you being alone right now. Berry will stay with you until I get back if needed," Quinn told her. "And, don't look at me like that. Either you let Berry stay with you and help you or so help me I'll call Brittany."

"Don't," Santana begged.

"Then let us help you," Quinn pushed. "I know having Britt here could make things worse, but we're going to have to tell her eventually. The Glee Grapevine is going to find out before the Press, if they do, and you know how much it will hurt her if she doesn't hear it straight from you. Things might not be great between you anymore, but we both know that you still love each other. This isn't going to fix anything between you, but we are still friends."

"The Unholy Trinity of McKinley," Santana whispered.

"That's right. We were. And, that hasn't changed. She's still our B, S, and she always will be," Quinn stated. "I'll make a deal with you, though."

Santana cocked an eyebrow at the blonde but said nothing. She was waiting to see what Quinn was willing to wager or give her for this deal. She knew that whatever it was, she wasn't going to like it fully and she wasn't going to back down. Damn Quinn and her knowledge of how to handle Santana, even at her worst.

"What?" Santana finally questioned with ire in her voice at Quinn's patience, waiting her out.

"You just can't help it, can you?" Quinn teased her.

"Q," she warned.

Quinn smiled at her. She knew that riling her up was going to help her get Santana to agree. Quinn was the HBIC for a reason, and she was about to prove it to both Olivia and Alex with one simple look and a few sentences.

"Look you play nice with Berry while I work on getting here to New York and I won't tell her. You don't and I will. But, if you play nice with everyone..."

"Define everyone," Santana pushed back.

"Well, let's say: Berry, Alex, Liv, and umm Jack and Huang when you see him and I'll help you call Britt and tell her what happened. And, I'll make sure that she stays with me and gives you the room you need when she comes to check on you, S. Because we both know that she will. B is still your friend, even if she isn't your wife. She still cares about you, San. That didn't change," Quinn told her.

"Yeah, well, she left me," Santana retorted.

Quinn sighed. She knew that this wasn't going help San's mood at all. She needed to find a way to get her back in the here and now. Pining over Brittany wasn't going to help her deal with the situation at hand. Quinn needed to derail that train quickly and make sure that San stayed focused on dealing with her trial, the possible child, and working through her anxiety after being attacked. She knew that this was going to be the worst of it all for the time being, right now. Tomorrow, it might be the baby. And, next week... Quinn thought about it. Brittany still needed to know. They had to tell her. She knew that Santana didn't want to hurt her. She never did, which is why she pined so much after the divorce and B moving to LA without her to dance. Santana let her go so that she would be happy, no matter how much it hurt. So, Quinn had to step up and help her deal with Brittany one more time. This was just part of being a member of the Unholy Trinity of McKinley. Sighing again, she reached for Santana's hand and held it.

"She did, but she still cares. That didn't stop because she moved to LA, San, and you know it," Quinn stated. "And I know you're scared, San, but you don't have to be. We're all here for you. All you have to do is ask, and you know that. I can literally work from anywhere. I've camped out with your for lesser reasons, Santana. This isn't going to make me run."

"Why not?"

"Because you're my friend and I love you, you twit," Quinn answered. "Besides, I sorta owe you for all the shit I put you through in high school. But, even then it didn't matter."

"No, it didn't."

"Then, why now?" Quinn asked her.

"You might have given me a lot of shit when I was pregnant with Beth, but we eventually found common ground. I had your back regardless when you came out at school and all the backlash. We stand together. That has never changed. It never will, San," Quinn reiterated. "So, be good. Play nice with others for a few days and we'll tell Britt together. Do you think you can do that?"

"If you have Berry here, I really won't have a choice," San replied.

"Good. I'll talk to her about all this on Monday," Quinn stated and then turned back to Alex and Liv, who were obviously flabbergasted by Quinn and Santana's dynamic. "I'll still need your contact information, if you don't mind. Oh, and the clinic's for Santana's privacy. When I have official documentation, I'll make sure you get copies for the case and to make sure that this bastard had no rights over the child. I'll fucking second parent adopt if I have to, but he gets nothing. Understand?"

"That's why I'm going to be reviewing case law, Quinn. I'm not going to let him either. We are going to take care of this. I doubt you'll have to adopt, though," Alex told them. "I'll give you my card. Call Liv if you need anything, though. She'll let me know if it is something I need to handle. Even midnight ice cream runs."

Santana smiled at her boss. Alex reached into her purse and handed Quinn her card personally. Liv followed suit after writing her personal cell number on the back. Quinn nodded to them both as she filed the cards away in her own wallet. Alex gathered her things and Liv stood up, reaching down for Alex's hand.

"Let's eat. We've waited long enough," Quinn said. "And you can tell me more stories about Santana in court."