I'd woken up a couple of hours ago, had breakfast, and taken a shower—going through my usual morning routine with little thought. Today was Sunday, a day meant for rest, and I had no plans other than to spend it at home.
The house was still and peaceful, and as I glanced out the window, the soft sunlight spilling in, I couldn't help but feel a faint sense of relief at the thought of a day without obligations.
Knock
Knock
Knock
"Come in," I said loudly, the doorknob being pulled the second the echo of my voice left the room.
Though, someone decided to bother the quiet atmosphere I was immersed in this morning. And without doubt, Nee-san entered-
"Good morning, hon," instead of the playful and irritating voice of my sister, a deeper and confident tone reached my ears. I glanced at the entrance of my room, and saw my father closing the door behind him.
"Oh, good morning, Father."
Did he have something in mind to talk about with me?
"Do you have any plan right now?"
I shook my head.
"I wanted to discuss some things with you alone," he said, approaching the window of the room, one hand shoved into his pocket.
"Haven't we already done that yesterday?"
"Yeah, but I thought it would be more comfortable for you if we talked a little more without the others, just the two of us, like the old times."
"I see..."
It's not often that Father decides to have a private talk with me in my room, it's usually only when there's something important to discuss. I suppose what I'm going through is more on his mind than I thought.
"Yukino, tell me about Hikigaya."
"Is there anything you want to know, precisely?"
"Since I am going to meet him soon, I would like to have an idea of what kind of personality he has."
So, my father seems to be interested in him?
Well, how should I describe Hikigaya-kun? He sure is quite the unique character. I don't even know where to start.
"Hikigaya-kun is... he's a boy unique in his kind..." I began to describe.
I paused for a few seconds to gather my thoughts, searching for a way to describe his personality clearly without making it too complicated.
"He's... unconventional. Blunt to a fault, and unafraid to voice harsh truths, no matter how they may come across. Even though he sometimes resorts to lying... I want to believe he's an honest person deep down. I think that honesty... it sets him apart from others."
I could feel my father's gaze on me, measuring my response, but I continued, trying to express my thoughts with the precision he would expect.
"He doesn't conform to expectations, nor does he try to fit in just for the sake of it. He sees things... sees people, with a clarity that's both admirable and isolating." I glanced away briefly, recalling his moments of insight that often left others unsettled, myself included. "He's perceptive. Surprisingly empathetic, in his own way—though he'd likely deny it if anyone were to say so."
Father regarded me in silence, his gaze unreadable, though I sensed he was absorbing each word carefully.
"This is effectively unique. He seems to share some similarities with you, but at the same time he's the opposite of you. I don't know how to put it."
I understand what he means.
"You sold him well, I'm even more curious now," he admitted, a small grin curving in his lips.
"His appearance might appear a little off-putting at first glance, but he's a person I think is worth having around."
"What do you think has made such strong feelings arise within you?" Father approached me.
A strange wave of warmth washed over me after his question. I don't know where it came from, but it felt as though his words had triggered my mind to replay the most intimate memories I shared with Hikigaya-kun. So many of them came flooding back to me.
"I... I don't know exactly how it happened... as I had been in denial for some times about it myself. However, I know how I realized it."
"Continue."
Automatically, I went on.
"I had a little help from Nee-san to be honest, but I remember that one day in the infirmary room..."
"What happened there?"
"Hum..." The words stalled on my lips. Part of me wanted to share, but another part felt too shy to say it out loud. My face grew even warmer as I fumbled, still struggling to find the right words.
At the same time, as special as it felt for me, I can't help but remember that it's from there that everything turned wrong for both of us.
"I see, I think I might have a good idea of what could've happened. I won't ask for further details."
"Thank you."
Father probably noticed the blush that had crept over my face as he thought about it.
A warm, genuinely content smile lit up his face, catching me completely off guard. What's come over him all of a sudden?
"This guy sure means a lot to you, huh," he chuckled, sitting next to me on the bed.
"He... Yes, he does mean a lot to me, even more since I could see him in his most vulnerable state."
I can't explain it, but whenever I was with Father, it always felt so natural to be honest with him. I never struggled to share some feelings that hung in my mind, even though it'd make me a little embarrassed to voice them out.
Maybe because he always gave off that warm and cool attitude, that I always knew that I could naturally trust him?
"I'm really sorry that it has to end like this..." His voice darkened as he finished his sentence, the sorrow lingered in the atmosphere as soon as those words escaped his mouth.
And, for some reason, I felt like a piece of me just broke.
I had no explanation for this. I always knew it, but being reminded in such a way by my father felt...
Heartrending.
"Yukino..?"
I looked at Father, feeling a slow warmth dampening my right cheek, a single tear that rolled steadily downward, finally gathering at my chin before dropping onto my lap. I continued to look at him, caught between silence and this unexpected emotion welling up inside me, an ache that was unmistakable but difficult to place.
The outward calm of my gaze contrasted sharply with the tumult in my chest, where the feeling felt painfully real, undeniable.
"I... I'm sorry Yukino, I should have been more mindful of my words. I didn't think it would—"
"N-No, it's not your fault. It's me... I don't know what's happening all of a sudden," I managed, my voice breaking as I reached to wipe the dampness from my cheek, brushing away any lingering trace of tears that threatened to follow. "I usually don't... even if I know, logically, what's coming..."
He was silent for a moment, absorbing my words with an expression I'd rarely seen from him—an openness that was almost vulnerable
"Yukino... hey, it's alright," he murmured, his voice gentle in a way I hadn't expected.
Then, with careful, unhurried movements, he reached out and wrapped his arms around me, his embrace warm and steady. He pulled me closer, his hand gently resting against my back in a soothing gesture.
As I felt his arms around me, something within me eased, and more tears slipped free, trailing silently down my cheeks as I let myself sink into the embrace, held together by this rare, quiet moment of comfort.
I instinctively buried my head into his shoulder, my eyes shutting tightly as my tears kept flowing.
I think I will never get used to this idea, no matter how many times they tell me that's there's nothingIcan do.
"...You must feel powerless right now, don't you?"
"..."
"I understand how you feel. I'm here, holding you as you break down, and while I can see the depth of what you're going through, I know that all I can do is try to offer comfort. Even then, I realize it's hardly enough to ease the pain you're carrying." He patted my hair gently.
"I'm already grateful for that, you know," I said, my words accompanied by a soft sob afterward.
He's actually the only one from my family who brought so much warm onto me since the last events.
"Yukino, listen intently to what I'm going to say next."
I opened my eyes, looking up at him.
"Do not give up," he affirmed, his tone gripping. "Don't let that feeling of powerlessness get the best of you, you're stronger than that."
He then took a deep breath.
"Hear me out, you are not powerless. You never were."
My eyes widened, my mouth parting slightly as I took in his words. Not powerless? How could he believe that?
I had never felt that my presence brought any real improvement to Hikigaya-kun's health condition...
"I don't know all the details of what you two have been through," he continued, "but one thing is clear—you've already done so much good for him, more than you realize. He was at his lowest, and you stood by him. Don't you see how much that meant to him?"
I stared at him, still in disbelief, my heart pounding.
"Let me tell you, as a man, I know how he must have felt having someone like you by his side. When a man reveals his most vulnerable side to the one he loves, he risks so much—his pride, his emotions, even his sense of self. And what did you do? You gave him support, warmth, and love. Your presence has affected him more deeply than you understand." He paused, his gaze steady. "Honestly, I don't know how he would have managed without you."
"Father..."
It was his opinion on the matter, but it managed to touch the depths of my soul. In that moment, I realized something I hadn't seen before.
"That's why I'm asking you not to give up. Even if everything seems to be over, there must be something within you that can turn the tables. Honestly, I have no idea what it is, so it's up to you."
Something in my capacity? What could it be? Until now, I didn't realize how unaware I was, I underestimated the impact I had on him all along.
Now, I know.
I know I'll never stop fighting. Even if I appear even more hopeless, I'll keep going. Even if it's futile, even if saving him is a goal far beyond my reach—I don't care anymore. None of that matters now.
"I... I understand it now," I murmured, a quiet determination settling into my voice.
"There, that's the look I've been waiting to see," Father said softly, a faint smile tugging at his lips. He reached out, his hand coming to rest gently on the top of my head, stroking my hair with slow, deliberate care. His touch was soothing, a rare moment of tenderness that carried an unspoken encouragement.
After a few minutes, we let go of each others.
"I'll be going out in afternoon for important matter, I can trust Haruno to take you back to your apartment tonight?" Father asked, standing up.
"Yes, I'll tell her."
"Alright, this small talk appeared to be quite meaningful for both of us. I hope you know what you're going to do next."
With a newfound determination, I lifted my gaze to meet his, the weight in my chest giving way to a quiet resolve. A warm smile slowly spread across my lips, one that felt genuine, unburdened by hesitation.
"Thank you," I said softly, my voice steadier now, carrying a sense of clarity I hadn't felt in a long time.
...
Pov : Hachiman Hikigaya
...
"You took your pills before going?" Komachi asked as I was about to step outside the house.
The weather outside seemed bright and rainless. I thought it was the perfect day to go out for once. I couldn't miss the new promotions at Animate, so I planned to go there today.
My mother was in a good mood enough today to give me some money so I could go shopping.
But, there was something that made her skeptic about letting me go.
I will be alone.
It's not much actually, but to them, it's as if I was going to risk my life. Of course there wouldn't be Yukinoshita or Yuigahama there, but that doesn't mean I wasn't able to survive outside on my own.
They're exagerating sometimes...
Though, let's remember that they're simply worried. So, I'll be satisfied by the caring.
"Yes, I took them right after lunch," I answered, finally preparing myself to step into the fresh air of outside.
"Okay, if anything happen, call us immediately, or you can even call your beloved Yukino-san if you want. But anyway, make sure not to put yourself at risk. Got it, Onii-chan?"
"S-Sure..."
"Be careful.." she muttered.
"Don't worry, I'll be out only for a few hours." I smiled reassuringly.
I finally left the house, and began to travel to the desired place. The store I am looking for is a little far from my home, and since I can't ride my bike the best option was the monorail.
I headed to the nearest monorail stop and bought my ticket. Fortunately, it wasn't very crowded at this hour.
If I could, I would have taken advantage of this occasion to invite Yukinoshita. I don't recall she'd ever read manga once, so it would have been the good moment to make her discover them and show her that mangas aren't just comic books made for kids.
However, she's likely still at her family's residence, occupied with whatever brought her there. I'd rather not disturb her for now.
After a few moments, I got off the monorail. The air was refreshing and not at all too cold, a pleasant breeze caressing my skin. The sunlight cast dancing shadows on the streets, illuminating each storefront. Having reached a well-known shopping district, I glanced around, searching for the familiar sign of Animate.
The only thing I hoped for here was to avoid running into anyone from school. In such a bustling place, someone like me could naturally fade into the background, becoming less noticeable to others.
Unless, of course, my sudden surge in school "popularity" had completely ruined that.
Finally, I'd arrived without any issues.
Animate stood before me, its bright, colorful exterior impossible to miss. Through the glass doors, I caught glimpses of shelves packed with manga, figurines, and posters, the faint hum of upbeat music spilling out.
Taking a step forward, I entered, greeted by the familiar scent of printed paper and the lively buzz of a store teeming with energy.
Why did I want to be here that much?
Well, here they sell a special volume of a manga I love pretty much, and currently in a very interesting price. The edition sold today is quite rare, so I don't wanna miss it.
It's the One Piece volume 100 edition collector.
You get why I want it that much now?
I've heard that it was here for once so, I'll make sure to get it. I walked through the manga aisles, until I fond the spot where are gathered the mangas that are a part of the 'shonen' genre.
I didn't find any One piece volumes here, then it's probably in the section after that-
"That super rare One Piece's 100th volume collector must be over there."
From the corner of my eye, I noticed a man leaving the section I was browsing, heading toward the corner. His silhouette disappeared from view, likely reaching his destination. Or rather... no.
"Got it! Phew, that was the last one," I heard him mutter triumphantly.
Panic flared, and I quickly moved toward the corner. There was no way I could let anyone else grab it. If I missed my chance this year, there'd be no getting it again.
I'll confront the bastard who dared to take what should have been mine.
I stepped into the section where the One Piece volumes were displayed, finding the man there, with-
Oh...
He was... tall, and kinda imposing. He was also good-looking, almost too good-looking to hang out in this kind of place.
The book I've desired since the day I planned to go here was in his hands, and it was effectively the last one of the shop.
A feeling of frustration filled my mind, but I didn't want to hate this guy for no reason. He's just a random person who got here before me, I'm just unlucky, that's all.
Though, I really wanted this volume, now I know I will never get it.
The man suddenly glanced in my direction. "Is there anything I could help you with?" he said.
Crap, I was staring for too long. I probably look like a begging kid right now.
"Hum, no, nothing, sorry," I answered awkwardly and tried to find a way out of this situation.
He still called me out neverthless.
"Did you want it?" He pointed at the volume.
"What would you earn from knowing the answer anyway?"
But he stood silent, as if waiting for a true answer. I sighed and finally gave it.
"I did want it, but it's yours now."
"I know that one is quite rare, I'll get you something else."
Huh?
What's gotten into him all of a sudden? Offering something to someone he doesn't even know...
"You don't have to. I'll just get something else with the money I have."
"But this money was meant to be used on this book, wasn't it?"
"And so?"
"I just feel bad when I see a kid staring at me with such a disappointed gaze as I hold what they desired."
So it's pure pity.
"It's alright, I'll just visit another shop and see what I can get for myself, I guess."
"I'll go with you."
"Huh? Why?"
Doesn't he know that following a minor that isn't a member of your family nor a relative to you is seen as something weird and suspicious for most people? Though, he's got pretty look, and based on his attire I wouldn't be surprised if he were a rich man. So, maybe he can get away with it.
"As I said, I'm going to buy you something because I feel bad taking a manga away from a kid."
He's saying that as if I were 10 years old.
"If you insist..."
He better not complain if I choose something expansive.
We left the manga store after he'd bought the volume and began to walk through the shopping district.
Now for some reason I found myself walking with an unknown man who seemed to be in his early 40s, maybe even a little older. And as soon as we reached a more crowded place, something changed in the atmosphere.
We were receiving gazes from people around, especially women. Even small whispers could be heard. I'm pretty sure he too noticed it.
Is this guy some sort of popular figure or what?
I don't know him, though. If he were a popular personlity of Chiba I would have recognized him.
"Girls, look at this guy! He looks so handsome!"
"Yeah, he's tall and got a pretty face."
"Should I try my shot on him?"
When the whisperes and murmures became more appearant, I directly understood what it was about.
"You attract quite a lot of attention, y'know?" I glanced at him.
"Oh? Ah, yeah. I'm used to it, though."
I'm not, honestly.
Hanging out with someone who draws all the attention while you fade into the background can get pretty awkward.
Wait, I'm used to fade into the background though.
"Excuse me sir..."
A woman who seemed to be around the same age as Hiratsuka-sensei approached us—him, her cheeks slightly flushed as her eyes darted around nervously before looking up at him.
"You're really handsome, are you single, maybe?" she asked.
He scratched his black hair and softly chuckled.
"I do appreciate the compliment, but I'm married." He showed the ring on his finger.
"I-I see, your wife must be lucky. I'll leave you alone then." The woman finally walked away.
And he's married? This guy sure won everything in his life.
"Not surprised you're married, huh."
"I have a wife and two daughters, the cutests in the world!" he said proudly.
"If you say so."
"Anyway, have you found anything that piques your interest?"
Aside from Animate, I hadn't really planned to visit anywhere else. But fate had other ideas, and now I needed to figure out where to go next. If I thought hard enough, maybe something would come to mind.
It's not my money I'll be spending, so there's no reason to hold back. What useful things could I get for free?
If this guy was as rich as he seemed, maybe I could even ask him to support my family—put the money toward something meaningful, something that could drastically change my future.
No, I'm exagerating.
After a moment of thinking, I told him that I'd try a few clothes in the clothing shop, which he accepted. I tried many fits, but none really suited my likes.
"And why not this one over there? I know it's soon summer but this coat is very durable and pretty efficient during snowy time. You could keep it for the next winter," he explained handing over the long dark coat.
A coat for the next winter?
"No, useless."
"Oh, okay." He put it back in its original spot.
After twenty minutes uselessly spent in that shop, we headed to a nearby vending machine to get a quick drink.
"I think you're just wasting your time with me, why are you still here?" I said, a can of Max Coffee in my hand.
"It's not a waste of time; I came here to kill some time in the first place."
"Haven't you found it annoying at some point? I refused everything you suggested me."
"Did you refuse because you didn't like? Or was it because you still don't want me to buy something for you?"
Honestly, a bit of both.
"There was only one thing I wanted in the start. I don't think I'll be really satisfied with anything else."
The volume I wanted is one of the lastest one of One Piece, also one of the rarest. I won't ever get the chance to get it again in the future, and this man is the reason why.
Unfortunately, the current circonstuences won't allow me to witness its end.
So, I don't think this guy will be able to erase the disappointment I'm feeling right now.
"You know what? I'll make sure you get it next time," he reassured, doing a thumbs-up.
"There won't be next time. I won't be able to come here anymore."
"..."
The man fell silent, a faint glint of sadness flickering in his eyes.
"Now, I'll be off. You probably won't see me again, so, have a good day and... Take care of your family."
I threw the can in the trash and began to walk away without waiting for any more responses from him. He'll surely forget about me tomorrow, so let's not make this last any longer.
I just wanna go home now, or maybe pass by a cafe quickly.
"Oi, kid."
I ignored him and kept walking, my pace steady and deliberate.
But then I heard quick footsteps approaching, closing the distance faster than I could react. Before I could quicken my own pace, he had already caught up and stepped in front of me, blocking my path.
"You're being a bit too stubborn," I said, my tone sharp but not unkind.
Suddenly, he pressed the bag—holding the volume I'd wanted earlier—firmly against my chest. I looked down at it, confusion flickering across my face as I tried to grasp what he was trying to convey.
Is he... Why would he do that?
"Take it."
Huh?
"But-"
"I said take it. It was your last opportunity to get that book, right? Then I'm giving you another one. You can grab that new opportunity and get what you desired." A faint smile appeared on his face.
"You're sure? It's very rare you know..."
"I'll surely manage to find another way to buy one. Don't worry about me."
My hand slowly reached to grasp the bag, my eyes not wasting time to peek at its content, the volume I always wanted to have.
"Thank you..." I uttered.
"You're welcome, now take care of it, and yourself of course," he said before walking away with empty hands.
This guy would probably forget about me by tomorrow, but I knew I wouldn't forget him. I could never forget him, not with this volume of One Piece—so precious to me—gifted by him. And with the little time I have left, I know I won't live long enough to forget such a moment.
This guy was such a weirdo, though.
I wanted to have a break after the long walk I had with that unknown man, and I got in this café.
The café I ended up in was a small, cozy place tucked between two larger buildings. The interior had a warm, inviting vibe, with soft lighting that made the polished wooden tables and chairs glow faintly. A faint aroma of coffee beans and baked goods lingered in the air, blending with the quiet hum of light conversation and the occasional clatter of cups.
I didn't want to linger for too long in such a crowded place, so I'll only have to get my drink quickly and-
"Haa-chan!" A cheerful, little voice reached my ears, stopping me in my tracks.
I know this voice too well.
I turned toward its source and met the sight of Keika Kawasaki, sitting and beaming at me like a little angel. In front of her was seated Saki Kawasaki with an embarassed expression on her face, the contrast between their reactions was showing a lot about how they felt about having my presence here.
"Please Sai-chan, I want Haa-chan to eat with us!" she begged her older sister.
"I-I don't think he-"
"Sai-chan..." Keika's eyes transformed into full-on puppy eyes, her pouty expression so adorably exaggerated it almost rivaled the nine-year-old version of Komachi when she didn't get her way.
Kawasaki stuttered, glancing awkwardly at me as if seeking backup.
I gave her a knowing look. I get it. Younger or not, they always find a way to make us cave.
"Ugh, fine," she groaned, throwing her hand out in a quick, almost exasperated motion toward me, signaling me to come over.
I took my seat next to Keika, both their gaze were the contrast of each other. One was looking at me with a wide smile on her face while the other was averting her gaze, her expressing filled with unease.
"I'm sorry, but I'll be quick here."
"Why Haa-chan..? I missed you so much..."
The way her tone took a sadder turn almost made me change my mind. Thankfully I had a well forged mind to resist this kind of things.
"Kei-chan, don't take it the wrong way. He is probably busy with... some other stuff," Kawasaki interjected, her tone fading in the end of her sentence.
"Your sister is right, I was told by my mom that I had to be back before the dinner. Do you understand? Imagine your mother yelling at you because you came back late at home, it is very bad, isn't it?" I couldn't help but throw a quick glance at Kawasaki as I said it.
Which only resulted to a glare from her.
"Yes..."
At least, she isn't sad anymore.
Kawasaki kept avoiding my gaze, as if trying to shrink into the background of the conversation. She let Keika speak, not making any attempt to join in.
I couldn't quite explain her strange avoidance. Was she feeling awkward talking to me ever since the truth about my health issues had been spread across the school?
Now that I think about it, we were with Keika. Honestly, I'd do my best to avoid bringing up that topic in front of her too. Maybe that's why Kawasaki was staying silent.
But sooner or later, her absence from the conversation would be impossible to ignore.
"Sai–chan, why you don't talk?"
Kawasaki snapped back into her senses as she looked at us.
"It's okay, I was just a little... pensive. Yeah, I was thinking of how Taishi was going to manage the next year, that's all."
A quick and efficient excuse, but would it pass through Keika's eyes?
"...Please, don't hate Haa-chan.." Tears welled in Keika's eyes as she spoke in a high-pitched tone.
"W-What? No, no, don't worry. I don't hate him..." Kawasaki reassured, patting Keika's head.
It's not like I particulary have any negative feelings towards kawasaki, but I begin to find this situation kind of awkward. It's obvious that Kawasaki does not desire my presence currently, even Keika noticed it.
"It's just..." Kawasaki's eyes shifted toward me, and darted away once more. "Nevermind, finish your chocolate croissant, Kei-chan."
Keika's sorrow-filled eyes were fixated on her sister, then she looked at me.
"What's wrong, Haa-chan?"
Now I was the one being interroged. Kawasaki looked at me, her gaze sharp as if she would kill me if I said too much.
I had one idea on mind, but I couldn't allow myself to talk about it in Keika's presence, however, if it were the real reason why she acted distant, I needed to bring it up to try to ease the tensions.
"Your sister might still be sad by the fact I will be gone next year."
Both Kawasaki and Keika's eyes widened.
"You... Where will you go?"
"Hum," I looked around, meeting Kawasaki's gaze by the way. "Somewhere very far." I scratched my hair.
As much as lying isn't something very admirable, sometimes you just feel like it may be the best solution.
"Oh no..." Her pupils trembled.
She's likely going to be sad about it, but it's better that way. Maybe someday, Kawasaki will tell her the truth when she'll be older.
Her reaction wasn't much different from Kawasaki's, even though, she already knew the truth.
"It's so unfair... But I wanna write letters to you so you don't forget about me!" she exlaimed.
"K-Kei-chan..!" Kawasaki's surprised reaction didn't hold back
"H-Huh, yeah. Write as much as you want, so you make sure I don't forget..."
I won't write back, so, I hope you will forget.
Kawasaki stayed silent, her mouth slightly parted as she stared at me.
I knew I didn't need to encourage her to do it. If she persisted, she'd only end up disappointed. But, as I said, being ignored time and time again would eventually make her forget about me and move on with her life.
So, it's not a big deal.
The only thing that pained me a little was... to see the joyful and optimistic smile on her face, filled with hope, false hope.
"Shouldn't you be going? It'll be getting late," Kawasaki said.
I understand it, my presence's probably annoying her here.
"I guess so." I stood up.
"Good bye, Haa-chan!" Keika waved.
"Bye." I waved back, throwing a light glance at Kawasaki.
Unexpectedly, she returned the gesture, her lips forming the word "bye..." as if speaking it silently.
I went to get my drink and left the café.
What am I going to do with the money I was given?
I'll keep it. While I was out, a thought crept into my mind—an idea that felt utterly foolish, yet one I couldn't shake.
Deep down, I knew I wanted it. If I managed to save enough money, then maybe—just maybe—I could actually get it. It was stupid, pointless even, to entertain the idea of buying something so unnecessary. But hey... sometimes, foolish desires are the hardest to ignore.
I've got only one life, after all.
"See you later, Yukino-chan! Also, thank Hikigaya-kun for me," Nee-san said, getting back into the limousine.
Thank for what?
"Why-"
I didn't have the time to ask my question that the limousine already drove away, leaving me alone in front of my apartment building.
Tomorrow is Sunday, meaning that I had to come back to my apartment tonight so I can prepare for school tomorrow.
How shall I resume my homecoming?
I don't have a bad memory of it, it's the contrary to be honest. That conversation alone with Father this morning had a lot of impact on me, and yesterday's dinner wasn't bad either.
I don't recall having talked much with Mother, we didn't have any meaningful interactions this weekend. Did she expect something from me? I can't answer that, but I suppose she must've talked with Father.
I don't know why, but I feel like since I sort of admitted that I loved the boy involved with the car accident, she.. she began to act slightly different with me. I don't really know how to put it but, she seems less hostile towards me for some reasons.
After I entered my bedroom and lay down on my bed. There was only one thing I wanted to do in this moment.
I grabbed my laptop and turned it on. There was some research I had to do on the Internet.
What illness is Hikigaya-kun exactly suffering from?
It was the first question I wanted answered in my mind. Since I found out about his illness, all I knew was that it was fatal and incurable. It was also a heart disease.
If I manage to learn a few things tonight about how to take care of someone who's affected by this kind of illness, I could be a better help to him.
For exemple, if his heart began to lose control, how could I help easing it?
Here, I found it. Apparently, it is called Fatal Cardiac Sclerosis (FCS).
I scrolled through the article detailing the disease, outlining all its characteristics. Some of them were familiar to me already, like how the heart becomes more sensitive to hyperactivity, the gradual deterioration of physical health, and the tragic fate that inevitably awaits the victims.
It literally broke my heart to read that, but I kept going, for Hikigaya-kun's sake. I kept reading the article, learning about more facts and characteristic about that disease.
One fact I hadn't known before was that the victims' hearts tend to darken over time. The closer they are to death, the darker their hearts become.
There was even a real image from an old patient on the page.
And honestly, it was horrifying. The thought of Hikigaya-kun's heart being like that made a wave of revulsion crash through me, a sickening churn rising in my stomach. I quickly scrolled down, desperate to move past it, not caring if I missed anything.
Then, a title caught my attention.
"Fatal Cardiac Sclerosis (FCS) is an extremely rare and dangerous disease that has claimed thousands of lives across all age groups. However, if the patient is still in their youth, there remains a glimmer of hope."
"..."
I stared at the words, my heart pounding faster and faster in my chest. I didn't know why, but a sudden chill ran down my spine, an overwhelming urge to find out what it was referring to. If I didn't, I felt like I might miss something crucial.
I clicked on it, and it led me to another page.
I scrolled down, my fingers trembling as I moved the mouse. The deeper I went, the faster my heart seemed to race. But then, as I reached the bottom, I stumbled upon a detail that would upend everything I'd always believed.
My eyes went wide, and my heart throbbed so violently that it felt like it might burst. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I searched for any signs that it could be a mistake, but there was no doubt. It was real.
"Fatal Cardiac Sclerosis was not incurable. It never was..." I murmured, reading the content of the article.
Shock flooded my mind, making it hard to process what I had just learned. A part of me still couldn't fully believe it—too impossible, too surreal—but there it was, undeniable.
Warm tears began to well up in my eyes as the reality of it sank in.
Father was right all along...
I was not powerless, I never was...
I can save Hikigaya-kun. A future where he is by my side isn't impossible.
They mentioned an operation that could potentially heal the hearts of young victims. I didn't need to read any further; I had found what I'd been searching for. For once, I could go to sleep tonight with the hope of a brighter future, letting myself dream of what might be.
Only one question lingered.
Why did Hikigaya-kun never talk or mention anything about it? Why did he always act as if... there was no hope for him? Why did he... give up on his own life?
I couldn't believe that he didn't know about it either.
Even his family...
With the way his father described the illness in the start, I and the others naturally assumed that it was most likely an incurable disease.
So, why is it only tonight that I find out about such an important matter?