Since August 30th, after scaring him to near death, Loona and I.M.P had been taking care of little Balin Johnson in Hell.
OCTOBER...
Two weeks since the weekend Balin called the time of his life, he and I.M.P were back to normal.
Even though Hell started getting more dangerous with Stella's new alliance with the DHORKS and the Cherubs, which now involved Striker, Loona and her nutty crew still kept their promise of taking care of him, come 'here' or high water.
...
One day during those two weeks, Loona brought Balin back to visit his parents in witness protection, and this time brought Blitzø and M&M in their disguises if they promised to behave themselves.
...Mainly Blitzø.
"You two've raised such a cool young man." he said to them. "I bet the sex you built him with was legendary."
"Uhh, whoa, whoa!" flushed Raven protectively. "Our little boy is in the house, sir."
Elton just leaned close to the disguised imp. "But to answer your question... Yes." he replied with a sheepish whisper.
Angry at his insensitivity, Loona lightly slapped Blitzø at the back of his head. But she was relieved that Balin wasn't there to hear it.
Inside, as the imps looked around the safe house, the parents discussed more God-parenting tips with Loona as she drank a cup of coffee, while Balin was upstairs looking around the bedroom they'd made for him.
This room wasn't as decorated as the one back at her apartment, but it had some of his old toys and posters from before they moved.
He dug through the pile of toys like a dog, trying to find one of them until he pulled it out a Buzz Lightyear action figure.
Looking at the toy with a smile, the boy softly pressed one of its buttons on the left, which made it say:
'Buzz Lightyear to the rescue!'
in his original Tim Allen voice, before he shook its hand with his index finger and hugged it.
"Almost time to go, Meal." smiled Loona.
She came into the room with her cup of coffee and saw Buzz in the boy's arms, smiling like he could cry happy tears, before placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Who's this little guy?" she asked.
"Loona, this is..." Balin then pressed another button on the action figure, which then said:
'Buzz Lightyear, at your service.'
"Let me guess. Another one of your favourite toys?" Loona smirked and chuckled, as Balin nodded showing his smile. "Well, why don't you ask your folks if you can keep it?"
"But, don't I have enough toys?" asked Balin.
"Hey, they'd want you to be happy, bud. Nothing else." Loona replied. "I'm sure one more toy won't hurt."
"Okay. Thank you, Loona." the boy smiled, then ran out of his room to ask his parents' permission.
"I'll be out in a second!" she called out to him as he ran.
She may've been in her human form, but feeling like there could've been another toy in this room, Loona crouched down and tried to sniff it out.
"Hmm... the kiddo has Buzz." she thought to herself. "But where that Woody at?"
...
Along with that visit, the boy's still been going to school with his friends, including Matt, and getting great marks thanks to his assist from Stolas, Via, Even Tex and Bee.
Neither of those friends saw the cast he still had on his chest when Stella scratched him up good during his kidnapping, and neither did his parents, thankfully.
He didn't have any nightmares about that day, not yet, but he was still recovering. Because after Loona cleaned and patched him up, it was sure to heal sometime very soon.
Even then, he knew he had the kindness of a champion and that if he was sad, he could always count on her to help out. As well as the three imps, if need be.
PRESENT-DAY:
Today was Monday on the second week of October, and the school bell rang for the day as Balin was studying Italian.
"Alright kids, I want those scenes rolling for our next lesson on Thursday, okay?" the teacher said. "With that, I bid you all adieu."
The classmates all looked at each other with raised eyebrows. Strange for an Italian teacher to say that.
Soon, the kids all started running out of the classrooms in a surprisingly straight line, including Balin, as he grabbed his backpack and waved goodbye to Matt.
Balin saw Loona waiting right next to the school parish carrying the Grimoire under her arms. And as she opened a portal to I.M.P, he hugged her around her waist, while she just ruffled his hair in response.
Soon, the two went straight back to Hell before anyone saw them.
...
AT I.M.P...
'There's a secret mission, in uncharted space. Let's go!'
Balin started zooming around the office in a crazy-eight race track formation with the Buzz Lightyear toy in his hand, making spaceship noises and even imitating his lines from the movies.
Meanwhile, Loona just sat at her desk and read a book from the living world called 'Murder on the Orient Express', by Agatha Christie.
As she read while the imps were out on yet another murder mission, her ears couldn't help but pick up Balin's play-time with his favourite toy from back home. And after looking around a few times to make sure no one else was around, she looked back at the boy and showed him a smile. One that looked rather sweet and motherly.
"Buzz, look out! We're going to crash into an astroid field!" Balin playfully exclaimed to his toy, before deepening his voice to sound like it. "Never tell me the odds!"
Loona giggled hearing him play like this and went back to reading in peace, until...
BALIN: "Oh no. A space hellhound! Whatever shall we do?" *as Buzz* "Hold your ground, space ranger. The wolf won't attack us, if we don't move."
The boy then stood very still, but still looked like he was about to break out into laughter. So giggling also, Loona put on a grin, put her book down, and stepped out from behind her desk ready to gently pounce or tackle him.
BALIN: *as Buzz* "Wait, for the first time ever, I was wrong! I was thinking about bears!"
Balin then pressed the red button on Buzz's spacesuit, which released the plastic wings, and got ready to run as Buzz then said:
'To infinity! And BEYOND!'
The chase was on, and Loona chased Balin around in the same crazy-eight formation.
She had her claws ready to try and grab the kid as this continued, but Balin continually went 'Pew! Pew! Pew!' trying to shoot her away. Using her flexibility, Loona was able to avoid the shots every time.
"Oh no! I've injured it." Balin said dramatically, as Loona played along.
As she stopped and pretended to be hurt, the boy also stopped to see if she was okay. But when he took a couple steps closer to her, she soon lifted him and Buzz into her arms.
"Rawr!" she roared playfully. "Who dares disturb the hellhound trying to read?"
Balin tried to find something to blame, but then ultimately landed on the toy, making her laugh.
"Well now... you're both going to be my prisoners." the hellhound purred, as she took them back to the desk.
A portal from the mortal realm then opened, revealing Blitzø, Moxxie, and Millie. Unfortunately, Neptune and Marijiana were at an important college meeting, so they couldn't show up for work.
It kinda pissed off Moxxie to know they wouldn't be working, but Loona just loved having him work here to seem squirm.
Blitzø then saw Loona sitting back at her desk with Balin sitting on her lap, as she handed the boss her bone-phone to call the client ahead.
"Hey, hi. Listen, we're done killing your bastard or bitch." he said, as some confusing chatter was then heard from the other side. "Sorry, I don't know what they looked like, I don't believe in racism. Anyway, feel free to wire in the pay now so me and my crew can celebrate our five years tonight. Thanks, bye-bye."
Blitzø then hung up the phone and wiped his hands as Moxxie walked up to him.
"Sir? What do you mean, celebrate five years?" he asked.
"Didn't you know, Moxx?"
"No, I did NOT know."
"Well, ya do NOW." continued the boss, as he cleared his throat. "Today celebrates 5 fuckin' years of I.M.P!"
Blitzø then showed a banner reading '5 Fuckin' Years of I Am Pee!' on the wall.
Yet the moment was ruined when... "BLITZØ!" yelled Loona.
"Oh. Sorry, Loonie!" Blitzø nervously chuckled, paying the swear jar as the mood went on. "The point is, I figured especially during this high surge of clientele over the last couple of weeks, we could all use a little night of celebration. And what better break-time there is to do so?'
"So, the company's turning five years old?" reiterated Moxxie.
"That, and Loona's adoption." replied Blitzø.
"Glad you could finally admit it for once." Loona rolled her eyes in a flat voice.
"Oddly peculiar..." Millie scratched her chin. "You never told us this, Blitzø."
"You're surprised, aren't ya?" said Blitzø, before turning his attention to the little human boy. "I just want the kid to tell us which flavour of cake we should get."
"Me? Really?" Balin replied in an also-surprised tone. "I don't know..."
"C'mon sport, all you little ones are always going Gaga over cake." Blitzø chuckled, ruffling his hair.
"He doesn't really eat too much sweet stuff, Blitzø." said Loona. "His parents did tell me after cake, he gets sugar rushes."
"I'm sure it'll be fine." replied the imp cheerfully. "There's always room to grow, new experiments to be tested."
"Well, fine. Can't wait." Loona said with a more aloof tone, and nearly a small smile, as she texted on her phone.
"That's the spirit!" Blitzø slapped his right knee. "Ow!" he groaned in glee before kneeling down in front of Balin. "So kid, which cake flavour would you like to choose? For the very first time?"
"Still a toughie." Balin pondered for a few seconds.
Soon, Moxxie tapped on Blitzø's shoulder. "What?!" the boss turned to him lightning fast.
"I believe sir, that Aunty Millie and I have acquired the perfect cake he'll like the look of." Moxxie grinned. "Take a look, Balin."
With an excited look on her face, Millie walked up to Balin with a shopping bag.
Balin and Blitzø kneeled down to see the cake was, while Loona just leaned from her desk secretly intrigued.
Millie then grabbed it out and went 'Ta-Da!' to show him it was a white chocolate mud-cake with Kit-Kats all around it and a pool of M&Ms on the top.
"WOW...!" Blitzø, Loona, and Balin went with stars in their eyes.
"Do you like it?" Millie asked the boy.
"I... LOVE IT, Aunty Millie!" Balin then ran up to her for a hug as she put the box down. "How did you know that was my favourite kind of cake?"
"Perhaps... my new aunty senses were tingling." she replied with a smirk.
"Now answer MY question." Blitzø said, with still-widened eyes at the cake. "Where did you guys get this one with the crystal so damn fast?"
Moxxie and Millie smirked to each other knowing the answer to that question.
...
FLASHBACK:
The imp couple ran into a cake shop in No-Name Town giggling, as Millie smashed the display cabinet to steal the cake before the owner came back to see them run off with it.
"What the fuck...?" he said in a very bogan accent. "OI! Stop those two kissing crocodiles!"
FLASHBACK ENDS
...
"Impressive." smirked Loona.
"Well, in that case," Blitzø said with a smile. "Let's have some cake! Millie, grab out your carving knife."
As Millie grabbed out her bloody knife from the mission, Loona stood from the desk and walked over to the cake herself.
"Step aside, old ladies." she said, unsheathing her razor-sharp claws.
Using one of them, she cut the cake into eight small slices for the imps and for Balin.
"Why thank you, dear Loona." bowed Blitzø.
"Don't mention it. Ever." she replied.
"Moxxie? Could you grab the paper plates...?" Millie asked her husband, fluttering her eyelashes at him like butterfly kisses.
"Anything, honey." replied Moxxie, as he went to do just that.
"So, I just wanna say a few words before we get started." Blitzø then popped open a bottle of booze like it was champagne. "I'd just like to say how honouring it's been, being one helluva boss for y'all so far, from this family of recruits to our first human. Even if he's rather little. I cannot wait for whatever comes next, no matter how dangerous or F'd in the A it may be."
"CHEERS!" Millie cheered, as Moxxie returned with the paper plates. "Oh! Uhh, cheers!" he replied too.
Everyone then said 'To I.M.P!' together before scooping one slice of cake onto each paper plate.
Millie scooped one piece of cake onto Balin's plate, before giving him a big kiss on the cheek.
"Mwah!"
Giggling and softly wiping the lipstick away, the boy started eating his slice.
"How's your slice, kid?" Loona's voice was muffled by hers.
"It's so... delicious!" Balin replied happily.
As the hellhound gently patted his head, Balin suddenly felt a little change going on in his stomach.
"Sir, if I may count here, there's only 3 more slices after this batch." said Moxxie. "Who's getting the other three?"
"Don't be a glutton, fatty." teased Blitzø, making Moxxie snarl like a cuckoo bird. "Whoa, Moxx. Since when do you growl like those wooden little shits that come out of the clock?"
"That wasn't me!" Moxxie exclaimed.
"He's right..." Millie shushed them. "Who else... was that?"
The three imps tried to listen for the sounds, until they remembered who else was in the office with them. They sure as hell knew Loona wouldn't make those cuckoo sounds, so they turned to the only other person in the room.
It was Balin, who was currently having a sugar rush.
He began bouncing up and down the office like a beach ball and doing somersaults as well, making the I.M.P gang shocked at the little boy's energy from just one slice of cake.
"So that's what a sugar rush is..." pondered Blitzø.
"You think?!" exclaimed Moxxie again.
Balin started pointing at Moxxie repeatedly and going 'HORNY! HORNY! HORNY!', making Blitzø laugh out loud at him.
"Stop it...!" the imp seethed at Blitzø as he kept on laughing.
As Loona let out a couple of snickers herself, she then felt Balin running rings around her like wicked fast before fluffing her bushy tail.
"OOOOH-HOHOHOHOHOHO!" he jittered. "FLUFFY, FLUFFY, FLUFFY!"
"Whoa, hey! Watch it there, kiddo." she laughed with a little embarrassment. "My tail's sensitive."
Balin then stopped and looked at her in pretend scarce, before somersaulting around the room until he knocked off one of his shoes, turning on the company radio.
"And now, a little nostalgia for y'all wayward sinners out there!" the radio said, as it then started playing...
"THE TWIST" by CHUBBY CHECKER
Hearing the music, Balin started dancing and doing all the signature Twist moves.
Moxxie was about to turn off the radio, before Blitzø slapped away his hand.
"OW!" groaned Moxxie.
"Don't! I think it'll wear off with the song." said Blitzø.
"Me too!" Millie waved her hand, before running up to the boy.
Standing next to him, she now started dancing to The Twist as well, following the same moves as Balin and occasionally grabbing him by the hand for a little spin, making him giggle at her ticklish hands.
Loona laughed a little as she video-taped this.
"Send me that later, would ya?" Blitzø whispered, slightly dancing to the beat now too.
"You got it." Loona began dancing to, but only with a tap of her foot and an occasional wag of her tail.
Soon, the entire I.M.P gang were twisting and swaying to the song. But none more so than Balin and Millie.
As they did one more dosey-doe at the second last note, the imp grabbed the kid and started landing a barrage of kisses on his face, being the proud aunty figure she was, before putting his calmed self back down.
"I am the dancing king!" the little boy shouted happily, raising his hands in the air.
He then passed out, falling face first onto the office carpet.
A/N: See y'all in the next chapter.