Amelia knew the feelings had already died down the minute she heard about the fallout of her relationship with Mich. But even her respect, let alone the admiration she had towards the blonde, had already dissipated along with everything else.

Amelia couldn't even bear to think about her.

How she'd think about Arizona and all she'd feel was shame.

Because Arizona, turned out to be a jerk who promised how long-distance with Mich would work, only for her to instantly call things off at the first chance of inconvenience of their already complicated situation.

How she broke things up over the phone - which also led to Arizona not only being deserved to be called a jerk, but also a coward, for not having the guts to say it to Mich in the most proper way possible. In a manner that Mich deserved.

How she couldn't even say it right to Mich's face that she could no longer be the same person that Mich fell in love with, how her work in Seattle had already gotten in the way - and how it turned out, she couldn't do both.

It made all things easier for Amelia to forget her, let alone to give a reason to hate her.

And she wasn't usually this type of person - to hold grudges, it was not as if Arizona even owed her anything. But Mich was her friend, and she had hurt her in ways she'd never thought she would.

She left Mich, and she let Amelia pick the pieces up for her.

Mich grieved in ways Amelia did not expect, how there weren't actually tears nor endless muttering of curses, and rants over cheap beers and cheezy romcoms. How she exhausted all her time to overwork herself, taking longer shifts, hogging all the good surgeries, and sleeping in on-call rooms.

And Mich acted as the person who was completely fine when Amelia knew her well enough that she was hurting, and was solely using work as a distraction to keep her mind occupied from actually letting the sadness in. How she'd still be in constant communication with Amelia and how she'd eventually throw some jokes in, their usual banter, and instil the shorthand hand between them to soften the blow of everything.

And Amelia lets her in.

Gladly, let her in - being the least that she could do for her.

If Mich wanted to grab the opportunity to scrub in on a laminectomy, Amelia would give her just that and a couple more of her surgeries for her.

If she needed someone to be there for her through the night because her bed was not an option as her sheets pathetically still had Arizona's scent, Amelia would gladly join her in an on-call room without question.

If she needed to be her person, to fill the void that Arizona once relinquished - then she could be that and more.

And that went on for a couple more months until Mich was able to pick up her bearings once again. Gradually, and delicately, in a process of healing that Mich was comfortable with.

Amelia had sworn to be there for her in the good times and in the bad until it all clicked into her one day - when Mich had finally flashed her with smiles that now reached her eyes, and when she was lucky - it would be her shit-eating grin which Amelia missed to see. How the nights in an on-call room had grown less frequent, because it had been exactly three months, and the bed no longer smelt of Arizona anymore.

How Amelia woke up one morning, with Mich leaning back on her headboard with a breakfast tray on her lap - because she cooked breakfast for her, and was smiling and was uncharacteristically sweet. When she sat up, Amelia just had to know - because she was just curious of what her deal was if there was any - because Mich can't cook for shit as much as her, let alone a morning person - but she was in her bed with a plate of bacon and eggs, and a cup of coffee with a stack of waffles on the side, all looking so damn heavenly.

Amelia thought of making jokes about the food - persisted in asking Mich if her breakfast had been store-bought was a good way to acknowledge her when Mich bit her lip hard - and she knew right there and then that her mind was actually onto someplace else.

It was Mich who broke the silence, and before Amelia could even ask what was really going on - Mich spoke. "Did you know Arizona's the head of the peds department in Seattle?" More of a statement than a question, almost sounding as if she was in disbelief.

And though it was all new information for Amelia, because she had no idea. Mostly because she never even bothered to know, regardless of whether her brother was working at the same hospital - she acted completely unfazed.

Because she knew Arizona really well and recognized her capabilities as a surgeon, let alone as a leader - who had proven time and time again she could do both with her time spent as a chief resident.

But there was also no denying how her emotions just couldn't sit right with her - because it had been months since Arizona had been brought up, and though she was completely happy with where she was, with Matt and a friendship that had grown rather stronger with Mich - there it was again, the consistent pounding of her chest because Mich was talking, and it had something to do with Arizona - and now she was unable to think all over again.

"Well - " She unconsciously licked her lips, feeling her mouth was already parched - or maybe it was still the effect of a freaking blonde peds surgeon that she slightly missed, gnawing at her. Amelia hastily grabbed a hold of the cup of coffee in one hand, as she let the warm liquid provide her the will to respond. "I wouldn't be surprised - I mean… she's just good at what she does." She shrugged and yet she internally flinched, because 'Arizona being just good' was an understatement - she had been a witness to that. But at this moment, and how she left Mich at a state where she was once in - that was all she pretty much deserved.

"Of course. I'm actually happy for her." Mich replied in honesty, her shoulders raised briefly to imply that she was shrugging too - because maybe it didn't bother her anymore as much as Amelia anticipated.

"Oh, okay." Amelia acknowledged her with a soft smile, as she went on asking her what Mich prepared for her instead - just to wipe the slate clean. Because it had been months, and it was no longer their business to know whatever it was Arizona was doing in Seattle. Not anymore.

Because she wanted Mich to move forward. But Mich didn't know - that she too, was also doing the same - moving on from an irresistibly hard-to forget Arizona Robbins.

And it went well afterward.

Unbelievably well. All three of them actually - because Amelia was now dating Matt, and Mich had been nothing but supportive of their relationship, because Mich liked Matt, and they got along pretty well - which was a first because Mich generally hated anyone she has ever dated.

And it was all fun, and free and so damn easy - and for a moment, and for the very first time, it felt like her life was on the right track.

Because she was doing so incredibly well with work and had found solace in Matt and with Mich - with no Arizona. And she learned, firsthand that - she could get along just fine without her - that for months, she was trying to check if a world without her was even possible, and it turned out - it was.

-x-

"Maggie -"

"She's interested in cardio - so she's basically mine. But I don't have any surgeries scheduled today, and I looked at the OR board and you have one booked later today at 4. And I thought you could use some help! See how good she actually is." Maggie was talking at full speed and Arizona was somehow still looking amused, and Amelia wanted to playfully question her how she would even think it was completely okay for her sister to walk in on them just like that.

When she believed they had other more important things to actually talk about.

But Arizona was no longer smiling and was relatively looking somewhat shocked as her smile had been replaced with a sullen look on her face.

Maggie led them back to the OR board, leaving them for a slight moment to call the attention of the new resident who recently joined the program. "Dr. Robbins, Dr. Shepherd, I want you guys to meet –"

"Murphy?!"

If the circumstances were any different, Amelia would have laughed right there and then with how Arizona was looking at the new resident as if she was accusing her of something that she wasn't aware of.

But Murphy - whatever her name was, was looking at Arizona all damn knowingly and had even taken the time to flash a sly smirk towards the blonde attending and it drove Amelia to an edge because it all seemed as if she was the one who unabashedly barged in on them.

She looked back at Arizona and back at the new resident, and Maggie was - well… "Wait. You know each other?" She asked, looking as if she was even more surprised with how the new resident still had her eyes focused on Arizona, and Amelia was fighting the urge to simply get in between Murphy and Arizona just so she could cut it out. Not that it would have made any difference. But it was driving her crazy, as it was pretty obvious that they had a history that she and Maggie knew nothing about.

Arizona cleared her throat, as she dipped both of her hands deeper into the pockets of her lab coat. "Leah used to work here."

"Oh." Maggie and Amelia found themselves replying in unison. But Amelia meant more than that, as she watched Leah take a step closer to the blonde fetal surgeon, with so much assertiveness. Amelia eyed the proximity but found herself astonished by how Arizona lets her.

"I'm sorry, for how long have you known each other?" Amelia found herself blurting the question as she folded her arms across her chest.

"Not too long. Right, Dr. Robbins?" Leah quipped as she flashed a smile towards Arizona and Amelia was quick to notice how the same smile was not returned, and how she only responded with a half nod/ half slightly vigorous shake of her head.

"Well, Dr. Robbins - if you've known each other long enough then I guess you've also been made aware of Dr. Murphy's great suture technique… She really has an extreme pair of steady hands." Maggie proudly exclaimed as Arizona winced. Almost found herself choking, especially from Maggie's last words. And that caught Amelia's attention even more, as she hated the thought of how Arizona's suddenly odd behavior was slowly making sense to her.

This time around, Amelia found herself shifting her full gaze back to Arizona, with creased eyebrows - because there was just no way this could be true. If her theory was even right that they've somehow -

"I –" Arizona began to say, slowly backing up from the group. She ran a hand in her hair, and the other free hand was used to rub the side of her collar uncomfortably. "I have patients." She went on to reply instead, and Amelia wanted to balk at that - of how lame the excuse was, and she was beyond annoyed because the day hasn't even started, and yet it felt as if everything she built with Arizona from last night had long been gone just because some resident thought it'd be a good decision to come back.

The group had already departed, and yet she still found herself following the blonde from behind. And Arizona had also been made unaware that it was Amelia's intent to be this persistent as she cornered her in the elevator.

"So – "

Amelia patiently waited as the doors closed to switch her attention back to Arizona whose eyes were locked firmly down on the floor. "That was kind of awkward." She blurted out, taking a step forward to press the elevator button leading them down to the pit. "She seems nice."

Shady . That was what she really wanted to say.

How badly Amelia wanted to tell Arizona how much of an idiot she was because Leah had already been undressing her with her eyes the minute she walked in and she didn't know.

And Amelia still didn't know as well - where she should draw the line if she was even allowed to be this honest.

There was definitely something about the new resident that just threw her off, and it all seemed obvious that Leah Murphy had something that even she couldn't get out of Arizona.

All she knew was that the exchanges of looks between the two had all been too familiar, which made things even more unsettling for Amelia.

Because Mich happened, and she was fully aware how she used to look at Arizona the same way. Moreso, Callie - pre and even post-divorce, Andi from path, and not to mention herself, who pretty much had been a fool, pathetically just looking at her for the longest time.

All with the exception of an Amelia Shepherd who just admired Arizona from afar all these years.

But last night happened, and it went great - despite Arizona's drunken state, she made Amelia feel safe and secured in her arms, and it was all too early to admit and maybe she was just simply at the peak of her emotions, but last night had been the best the sleep she's ever had for the longest time.

Last night was different because it was not a typical hook-up, there was no sex - there was only Arizona. And she had her in her room, in Meredith's kitchen for coffee, and for a while - she had her in the damn supply closet. Arizona was sharing things about the bits and fragments of their past, a past that Amelia tried to bury, how she could still remember the sweatshirt, and the incident they had in the sink… and a completely blatant and 'first to hear' confession of how she had been jealous of Matt.

How she was afraid to admit things then because of the unspoken - that she was with Mich, and she should know - that she felt the same way, and even more.

But now came another hurdle, because now there was Leah - and she couldn't seem to shake the memory of how she looked at Arizona, and how Arizona fumbled for her words. And a discussion was not even necessary, and yet she found herself asking for more because she was jealous.

Jealous all over again, because everyone seemed to have it so damn easy with Arizona but her.

"There's always a story behind everything, isn't there?" Amelia began to say, as she masked the hint of bitterness dying to slip off her tone. But it all had been just too evident, to the point that her apprehension caught Arizona's attention, as she swiftly turned to her side to press the emergency button - putting the elevator to halt.

Instinctively, Amelia suddenly became anxious as she pulled her body forward from the elevator wall to reach the control panel, but Arizona was quick enough to block her arm.

"Amelia –"

"No, forget it." She backpedaled, realizing how Arizona didn't owe her anything - how it was a mistake to even pry, because Arizona was now standing too close, and she could feel the warmth of her skin radiating against her arm, and she was still wearing the perfume that she had been using since their days at Hopkins, clouding her senses.

"You have questions, I-I'll give you answers," Arizona reassured her, piercing blue eyes making it all too difficult to not give in. "I can't give them all to you now, but can I take you out tonight. Please?"

There it was again, the consistent pounding of her chest being brought alive - and the spark of hope that sets Amelia ablaze. "Why are you suddenly being so persistent?" She inquired, because it had been years since they'd reunited at Grey Sloan, and not once did either of them had been close enough to ask the other to go out. It had just been that way for the longest time.

Amelia thought Herman could somehow change that, but it didn't. Which was why it was all a surprise to hear that Arizona was asking her ou now. Whatever that meant.

Arizona looked at her with so much intent and she thought maybe that was it . Maybe what she was really meaning to say was the thing that Amelia had been wanting to hear for the longest time. "Because I meant what I said that we lost what we once had then… at Hopkins, and I want that back." She furrowed her eyebrow as the blonde moved forward to grab a hold of her arm, and her breath hitched. Something about how Arizona was fumbling for the words to say to Leah earlier, and yet here she was, talking to Amelia, with so much firmness laced in her tone.

"I want us to be friends."

Amelia scoffed, trying not to sound offended by the remark - even if she felt Arizona's remark was partly true. "Okay, I'm going to pretend you didn't say that because the last time I checked, we are –"

Arizona waved a hand to dismiss her, a sly smile forming on her face. "We're co-workers –"

"Excuse you , I've once picked Sofia off from daycare."

"For Callie . Because Callie was still in surgery." Arizona threw in a knowing look as she narrowed her eyes, slightly pouting her lips to poke fun at her.

Amelia found herself looking at Arizona's lips, and abruptly moved her eyes up to meet her gaze. "Fair enough."

The moment was cut short when the sound of Arizona's pager came off, alerting her needed presence to the pit. Amelia swiftly leaned forward to put the elevator back in motion with a quick press from the control panel and she found Arizona smirking from the corner of her eye. "So was that a yes?"

"Fine. You're buying dinner."

As friends.

At least, they were going somewhere - this time.

-x-

Life had been generally unfair, or for some shitty reason, Arizona made it be.

When all the muscles in her body ached from scrubbing in from a long surgery, when she thought that she could even afford to sleep in a pitch-black, rather unoccupied on-call room, Mich barged in all so suddenly, heavy footsteps dragged all the way to where she was - and Amelia wanted to scream because she was beyond exhausted, and the least Mich could do was to give her space - but she stopped right in her tracks when she heard an evident sob that Mich was trying so hard to swallow in her throat.

She sat straight up from the bed, as she turned the light from the lamp sitting atop her drawer beside her bed. Only to reveal Mich who now had visibly damp cheeks because she had been crying, and she didn't know what exactly happened - because Mich never cried about anything unless it had been about a patient she just had or –

"I'm so sorry." She slumped down on the bed beside her, running a hand in her hair in frustration, in between sniffles - Mich tried to stifle a laugh. "You must be sick of me by now."

"You know, that I don't." Which was the absolute truth. Because Mich was Amelia's friend, and pretty much the closest person she could ever consider as a family at Hopkins.

It took a long while before she was able to get the old Mich back, and it may have seemed she had lost all the progress she made overnight just because Arizona may have done something to hurt her again, whether it had been directly or and indirectly, Amelia found it all maddening.

Because it had been evident that Mich was already doing so well on her own.

"What can I do?" Amelia asked out of sheer desperation because she wanted to help - wanted to take the pain away on Mich's behalf if she could.

Mich shook her head - a gesture that there really was nothing she could do. She carefully leaned forward, with both hands, gripping tightly on the edge of the bed. "It's fine - I mean it was bound to happen, anyway." She dropped her gaze down to the floor instead, as she brought her hand up to wipe the tears on her cheeks. "I don't even know why I'm even crying." She shrugged as she laughed sardonically.

"You should… You should - let it out. You haven't done that since you guys –" Amelia paused, couldn't even find the way to say the words, because Mich had been fragile for the longest time and she just didn't know which one was safe to say and not, at this point.

"Arizona met someone –" Mich admitted. And she was talking, and was at it for a long while - but Amelia felt as though her head had a mind on its own because she couldn't actually comprehend what she was saying. All that she knew was that Mich heard it from her friend and at the same time, an ortho nurse at Seattle Grace - who was also working with the woman Arizona was seeing.

So, it turned out - that Arizona still had a thing for residents - but the only major difference was that - the said woman specialized in ortho… a very hot ortho chick, as Colleen would rather put it.

Okay, but fuck Colleen - or whatever the ortho nurse's name was - because if she claimed that she was Mich's friend then should have known better not to bring Arizona up, regardless if it was Mich who asked.

Most importantly, fuck Arizona.

Fuck Arizona even though it had been six months, and what she and Mich had - pretty much had been long gone already.

Because it wasn't supposed to be this way, it wasn't supposed to be Mich who should be suffering. And yet here was Arizona thriving in her own damn career, and was now with a hot raven-haired ortho chick in a new city - and she managed to get just about everything anyone would ever want in a span of six months.

-x-

At lunch, Amelia swooped by at the table Arizona and Alex shared as they reviewed scans for her upcoming procedure. "So, Alex have you met Maggie's favorite resident - "

She thought she was being funny, for a while she swore she was - when Arizona's eyes widened in fear and when she sensed that Arizona was about to put a word in, Alex cuts her off - flippantly pointing his fork out to her, trying to prove a point as he was also busy with his own lunch. "Arizona slept with her."

Of course.

Amelia already knew that, the awkward glances somehow gave everything away but she also failed the urge to act impassively, and for a moment she felt her throat tighten because Amelia wanted her assumptions to be wrong, for once - but no , she was still not Arizona's type, and yes , it turned out that Arizona still had a thing for residents.

Arizona nicked Alex hard on his shoulder, "So did you, and shut up." Sparing an apologetic look on Amelia - but Amelia couldn't even afford to look, let alone acknowledge her, as she contemplated if it would make more sense if she stared back down on her own salad instead.

But she already lost appetite, and she could sense even from her peripheral view that Arizona was practically begging to meet eyes with her.

Amelia cleared her throat, trying to sound non-judgemental which she spectacularly failed, she raised her head up, locking eyes with Arizona. "So, you both slept with her?"

"Oh God, no - not at the same time!" Arizona proclaimed and Amelia wanted to suppress her laugh, because of course she knew that, yet Arizona made it all difficult for her to even rephrase what she really meant.

She couldn't seem to laugh, no matter how she urged herself to do so - because it turned out, again, her assumptions had been true, and she found the damn truth too difficult to swallow.

And she wanted to know more, but also - it was not her place to ask.

Arizona didn't owe her anything.

Amelia had to remind herself that.

-x-

So Derek called.

More than twice.

And she had been staring at her damn phone for the past hour, contemplating if she should pick it up.

Because Derek was Derek, and they weren't particularly close - but they talk, occasionally on the phone - when she needed something, or when he wanted to genuinely ask how she was doing. At least once or twice in three months.

And she was already in the last year of her residency, and Derek knew she particularly didn't like to be bothered, mostly because long phone conversations were not her thing, and because she was busy. Yet, here he was - calling the crap out of her, and was just being too annoying because she figured this all could have easily been settled by a series of text messages instead.

Unless it was an emergency.

And the immediate thought, drove her insane - because she'd always assumed the worst outcome as it stemmed from the many other disappointments that occurred in her life then, and Derek was still here, calling her for the fourth time now - so she hastily picked her phone up, with shaky hands - drawing a breath in, unwillingly waiting for the shoe to drop.

"Who died?" She was quick enough to ask, without even putting a second thought on how brash she completely sounded over the phone.

"Uh - "

So he was alive, and Amelia internally gave a sigh of relief. "No one. Amelia?" Derek went on to ask, pulling her back from her thoughts.

"Oh, hey! Sorry 'bout that. I was… just trying to be funny." She winced.

The secondhand embarrassment probably must have been felt by her brother as her sly remark was exchanged with silence.

"Yeah… I figured." Derek laughed, and her heart swelled.

Fine.

She missed her brother - but there was no way she'd even begin to admit that out loud. "What do you need?"

"Nothing. Am I not allowed to ask how my sister's doing?" Amelia playfully rolled her eyes, as she readjust the grip on her phone - holding it closely on her other ear to hear him better. "And also, to share with you that our new head of peds came from John Hopkins -"

"Arizona Robbins." She let out on the spur of the moment, not realizing that she probably had mentioned her name too loudly, as she turned her head back to scan her surroundings and thanked the heavens that Mich was nowhere to be seen. "Yeah, I know her. I mean, she dated my roommate."

"Oh, so you know her? And she dated Michelle? Wow." Derek sounded completely surprised, and Amelia wanted to add more - because she was still irrationally angry at Arizona for how she left things with Mich, but she had never been in the right place to say anything towards Arizona, nor was Derek the right person to actually share things that didn't even involve him nor her to begin with.

So Amelia thought of changing the topic, if not - respectfully asked Derek to ask something else. Something that involved her because she couldn't handle the fact that Arizona was now working in Seattle with her brother, and it somehow bothered her because it seemed that Arizona now had full knowledge that Derek was her brother, and yet she didn't even bother telling Derek that she'd known Amelia. That it had to come to a point where Derek was the one to even ask about her.

But really, did she even ask about her? To Derek? Not that she was obliged to ask about Amelia because it had never been Arizona's business to ask - but Amelia couldn't help the thought that maybe Arizona never did. Because maybe, she never really cared at all.

Or maybe Arizona already stopped caring about Amelia the minute she called it off with Mich.

Amelia tried not to be bothered by that.

Not her place anymore. She persistently kept telling herself.

-x-

It was already 8PM when Amelia barged in on the attendings' lounge only to be greeted by a bra-clad Arizona who was still in the midst of changing from her regular scrubs. "Let's go to Joe's."

"Woa- hey!" Arizona yelped, as she quickly pulled her blouse across her chest in an attempt to cover herself. "You could have at least knocked." She reprimanded her as she was quick to turn around to have the smallest ounce of privacy to pull the sleeves of her blouse back for her to wear.

"Well, the last time I checked this was actually a shared space." Amelia pointed out, trying to sound completely unfazed that the sight didn't instantly do things in the pit of her stomach, which was also the reason why it had been partly difficult to catch the breath that somehow got stuck in her throat. "You don't wear tank tops underneath your scrub top anymore?" And she chewed the inside of her lip, hard - because it was definitely just a comment that she was thinking in her head, and yet she impassively let her thought slip out. For the nth time.

"Oh, so you still remember?" Arizona turned around with a smirk, both hands still rather occupied as she worked on putting the buttons of her blouse back in place. "I still wear them - it's just that I ran out of clean clothes to wear. And no, I'm not taking you to Joe's - Amelia."

"I'm not going to drink if that's what you're worried about."

"I know that." She met with her eyes in understanding, a small reassuring smile formed in her features and Amelia somehow found herself relieved by that. That she knew her well enough to be trusted. "You said it yourself, I'm buying dinner - so I'm taking you to a nice fancy restaurant."

"From the looks of it, it seems that you haven't tried Joe's black bean veggie burger with waffle fries yet." She eyed Arizona in amusement, watching as her mouth slightly fell open. She should know that the only reason why she was only pushing for Joe's was that being in a small intimate space with Arizona across her table was something she was not entirely ready for yet. And she needed the unnecessary noise and ruckus of a bar to prove a point that they were only just two friends hanging out.

Nothing more, nothing less.

"You had me at waffle fries. Are you ready to go?"

-x-

So Joe's. Again .

Only this time, it was just them - no Andi, no April, and Arizona was not drinking. Despite the number of times Amelia kept reassuring her that she could handle herself just well. But Arizona was buying, and now they were bonding over an overwhelmingly large burger which they both agreed to share and a basket of waffle fries on the side, with diet coke - because again, Arizona reminded her that she had no plans of drinking tonight.

They were sitting right next to each other at the bar stool table, sitting rather completely close - and she could feel the occasional bump of Arizona's knee on her left thigh, and Arizona's scent still lingered despite how it had been hours since their shift ended. Amelia found herself lost in thought, as she propped her elbow to support the side of her jaw that she placed on her hand, entranced by how Arizona was now cutting the burger into half, watched as how completely focused she looked - as she bit the bottom of her lip.

"So was this your way of saying thanks after last night?" Amelia inquired as Arizona flashed a grin, putting the other half of her burger on Amelia's plate.

"Yes, and no." She heaved a sigh of contentment, as she gently pushed the glass for Amelia's taking, clinking the non-alcoholic beverage with her own. "You are on the road to friendship with me, Amelia Shepherd, there'd be more of this - I'm hoping."

"Here's to more."

And together they talked for what seemed like two more hours - of banter, and making up for a lost time, and Amelia had been laughing and enjoying Arizona's company, how she could completely make a fool of herself and still looked so amazing and charismatic. They caught up on the days they spent at Hopkins, some surgical cases they've previously worked together with, even caught up about the details with Nicole Herman, Mich, and Matt - how Arizona was left astounded by the fact that Mich eventually ended up with Matt, and was now the person she was married with - and how they eventually lived Mich's dream as they were now working in New York-Presbyterian, and had the three kids and white picket fence that Amelia once thought that Arizona and Mich would be having - which was also, the same detail that she left out from Arizona.

"So I guess, everything worked out in the end." Arizona went on to say, and she looked evidently drunk despite the lack of alcohol presence - because she was looking at Amelia differently now, with more propensity and she had already moved her stool closer to her own, because the bar was starting to get a little more cramped as guests kept coming in, and they were forced to move their chairs within close proximity.

Not everything.

That was what Amelia really wanted to say, because it had only been Matt and Mich who were able to move forward with their lives, and also, Arizona. Who may have already broken up with Callie, but at least gained the profound and irreplaceable experience to love and to have been loved. How it seemed that Amelia had been the only one left out of the equation, and how she had more losses than wins for the past decade.

But she didn't want to do this again, to Arizona - not tonight, because tonight had been fun and she didn't want to ruin the moment for her. She decided not to dwell on that, so instead, she offered to do something else.

-x-

"Seven o'clock - the guy at the back wearing a black leather jacket - hazel brown eyes, sporting quite an attractive stubble…" Arizona was pointing at the guy behind her with pouted lips and Amelia found it appealing how her dimples would show when she would do that. Amelia tilted her head to send a message that she made the effort to look towards the guy Arizona wanted to pair her up with and gave the blonde surgeon a playful wink. "He seems nice - but no. Not interested."

She lied , of course - she didn't look.

Nor was she actually paying attention.

Because she didn't want anyone but Arizona.

How can Arizona be so damn naive?

That the game had only been a set-up because she thought maybe tonight would be the night to tell Arizona. That she wanted her, only her – but Arizona was very much into the game, and was rather taking it all too damn seriously, as she groaned in frustration, waving her hands dismissively. "What - still no? He looks kinda hot! I mean, if I were straight, that is –"

"My turn." Amelia quipped, abruptly cutting her off mid-sentence but Arizona was having none of it.

Arizona stammered, putting a hand in front of Amelia's face - gesturing to let her finish. "No way , I haven't found you a potential love interest yet –"

"Would you rather if I ask you about Leah -"

"Okay, fine…" Arizona playfully rolled her eyes, purposely averting her gaze and avoiding the question at the same time. And Amelia knew it was a low blow, when she never really had any intent to ask about the resident in the first place. But she was a mess, and never really had any idea on how to verbalize whatever it was that she wanted out - because if tonight would turn out to be successful, then Arizona would be the first one to hear Amelia actually talk about feelings.

But she didn't know how to properly start it off - because again, she had never been the person to share about anything. But Arizona was making it all extremely difficult to even make a move, because she was looking back at her now with so much patience and anticipation, and she was still smiling so hard that it would make Amelia's fingers twitch for some unknown reason, or maybe it was just because she'd been fighting the urge to place her pathetic hand in hers.

But they weren't anything, yet - and she badly wanted them to be something.

"Call me little Ms. Flashback Friday - but I also remembered you that day, when you asked me if it bothered me to know that Matt Andrews was having sex with you. And I didn't answer you then because - I was not sure if I was allowed to say, yes "

"Why were you jealous of Matt then?" Amelia unexpectedly asked. She covered her mouth with her hand for a brief moment, somehow taken aback that she even allowed herself to ask that question out loud.

Arizona's smile faltered and had then been replaced with a confused look - evidently surprised by the sudden question. "Hey. I thought it was your turn to find me a date." She raised her brow, as she wrapped her arms across her chest - of course, she'd ask about the game.

But Amelia was having none of it, as she smirked - the impulse to simply press her lips on hers had been hanging by a thin thread because Arizona was simply too damn stubborn, but she still managed to keep her composure at bay, no matter how it all felt enticing to just pull her in.

She'd been waiting for this moment ever since she developed feelings towards the blonde and Arizona deserved to know everything she has ever felt since the beginning - so a kiss at this point would have been too damn easy. Because she wanted Arizona to know that it had never been just an attraction. That it came to a point back then, that she hadn't been afraid to admit that she once fell in love with her, and had been irrationally jealous, had been hurt and felt mistreated by Arizona despite them not being anything than what they were then, and even now.

"You're going to have to answer the question, first."

"I don't think it deserves an answer," A frown masked Arizona's features as she shook her head, and she was directly avoiding her now - which also filled Amelia's drive to pursue her even more. "None of it matters, anymore. And it was wrong for me to -"

"Would it matter, if I told you I'd been jealous of Mich, too?" Amelia lifted her head up to lock eyes with Arizona, and she tried so hard to swallow the desperation from her tone but failed - because she badly wanted them to be at the same page, for once. "Please tell me we had the same reasons for being unrightfully jealous because you've been driving me fucking crazy ever since –"

" Amelia –"

Amelia swiftly swiveled her chair to fully face Arizona, until her knees made contact with the inside of both Arizona's thighs - reminded her of what had happened between them almost a decade ago in Mich's room, and how she reprimanded everything that she had ever felt from that brief moment they shared, and how things have gradually changed now - because now she had room to fully and freely process, let alone, feel everything that was happening without worrying about what anyone would think - because at this moment, and a decade later, there was only her and Arizona.

They were sitting too close now, but Arizona held her ground and showed no hesitation that the sudden proximity bothered her. Amelia unintentionally let out a soft whimper because she felt Arizona's breath gently fanned the column of her throat, and felt her mouth dry with the sight of Arizona timidly poking her tongue out to lick her own lips.

"Damn, not even a kiss?"

"No – I mean, that's none of your business!"

Oh , but it all seemed as if that could change tonight.

How gladly she could tell Mich the next day that she finally knew what it was like to kiss Arizona Robbins.

"Twelve o'clock – the woman sitting right in front of you. Hot , self-proclaimed very hot brunette, blue eyes - not the same shade as you, but darker. Single, and very much attractive and unabashedly attracted to you, would you say yes?"

-x-

Maybe it all felt wrong to impose when Arizona made herself clear that they were on their road to being friends, but God, Amelia couldn't absolutely wait no more.