(A man in gray COG armor and a matching helmet holds up an assault rifle with a chainsaw bayonet attached and revs it up menacingly.)
COG Gears: The COG's fearless soldiers who fought toe to toe with the Locust Horde...
(A Gear soldier is shown cutting down a drone in a hail of gunfire while another one cuts into a drone's neck with his chainsaw bayonet.)
vs.
(A man in green clothes, body armor and a matching helmet points his pulse rifle at the screen.)
Colonial Marines: The legendary marines who face off against the most dangerous threats the universe has to offer.
(A Marine is shown killing off an attacking xenomorph with a burst from his pulse rifle.)
WHO IS DEADLIEST?!
To find out, we've assembled a team of world-class fighters to test history's most lethal weapons. Using 21st-century science, we'll see what happens when two warriors go toe to toe.
No rules. No safety. No mercy. It's a duel to the death to decide who is...THE FICTIONAL DEADLIEST WARRIOR!
Here in our elite fight club, we have gathered doctors, scientists and weapons experts to test out the lethal arsenals wielded by each of our combatants to determine who would win a fight between two warriors who never met in a face to face duel:
COG Gears
Appearing from: Gears of War series
Armor: COG Armor
Loyal to: Coalition of Ordered Governments
Most Common Enemy: Locust Horde
Colonial Marines
Appearing from: Aliens and AvP expanded universe
Armor: M3 Pattern Personal Armor, M10 Pattern Ballistic Helmet
Loyal to: United Americas
Most Common Enemy: The Xenomorphs
"Today, it's a battle between two futuristic infantry forces. On one side you have the Gears, representing the Coalition of Ordered Governments. On the other, you have the United States Colonial Marine Corps representing the United Americas," biomedical scientist Bradley Foster started.
"These guys are used to fighting on foreign planets against inhuman monstrosities. You can bet they have to be mentally and physically hardened and ready to expect anything," trauma doctor Joseph Kaiser followed up.
"What excites me so much about this match up? More future technology!" computer expert Eddie Cortez beamed, "We've got a total space age looking arsenal here. You've got advanced assault rifles, flamethrowers, grenade launchers, a freaking chainsaw bayonet! What's not to love about this match?"
"The sooner we get this testing done, the sooner we can see the big battle at the end. Let's blow some shit up," Bradley concluded.
The camera cuts to a bearded muscular man with a shaved head who is wearing standard-issue Gears combat armor. He is holding an assault rifle with a chainsaw bayonet attached that he revs up menacingly.
Up first to represent the Gears will be CaptainJ.D. Fenix.
A captain with the Coalition of Ordered Governments Army and a veteran of the Swarm War, J.D. Brings firsthand knowledge of the Gears' weapons and tactics.
"The Colonial Marines can talk tough all they want, but in the end that's all they are: talk," J.D. spoke coldly.
The camera then cuts to a woman with tanned skin and brown hair who is clad in armor similar to the Gears and holding a futuristic shotgun.
Also representing the Gears will be Corporal Kait Diaz
An Outsider turned Gear, Kait brings her own unique brand of survivalist instincts to the Gears.
"The Gears mean business. They will take on anything they are sent to fight. They never back down," Kait proclaimed.
The Coalition of Ordered Governments was formed after the Era of Silence. It wasn't long before they would be battling the Union of Independent Republics in the Pendulum Wars for control of the planet's resources in a war that lasted seventy-nine years. Leading the way on the front lines was a tough as nails standard infantry known as "Gears."
"The Gears fought all over Sera to secure the Imulsion that was needed for the survival of our society. It was a brutal and bloody conflict, but in the end the COG ultimately prevailed largely in part thanks to a weapon known as the Hammer of Dawn," J.D. explained.
There would be little time to relax as the Gears found themselves forced into battle against a new threat known as the Locusts, who began a planet-wide invasion of the surface known as Emergence Day. The Gears were immediately mobilized to combat the new threat in what would become known as the "Locust Wars," a back and forth conflict that waged on for fourteen years and saw the COG sustain heavy losses before they again used the Hammer of Dawn satellites and the sinking of Jacinto City to gain victory over the Locust Horde.
"The Gears are highly trained and highly resilient. They were in a continuous state of war all throughout the Pendulum Wars and that ultimately helped them in the Locust Wars. These Colonial Marines are nothing to them," Kait concluded.
The Gears triumphed over their Locust adversaries thanks to a technologically diverse arsenal of weapons:
Short Range Melee: Chainsaw Bayonet
Short Range Pistol: MX8 Snub Pistol
Mid-Range: Gnasher Shotgun
Long Range: Mark 2 Lancer Assault Rifle
Special Weapon: Scorcher Flamethrower
Explosive Weapon: Bolo Grenade
But how will the Gears stack up when they are pitted against an equally determined new challenger that has faced down its own share of deadly extraterrestrial threats?
The camera cuts to a man in green combat armor with snow white hair. He takes a pulse rifle and holds it close to his chest as he looks to the camera.
Up first to represent the Colonial Marines is Corporal John "Duke" Cameron.
A veteran Marine who has survived brutal campaigns against the Xenomorphs, Duke brings firsthand combat experience.
"These Gears haven't experienced the same kind of hell as us and lived to talk about it. Colonial Marines are the real deal," Duke proclaimed.
The camera then cuts to a tan-skinned woman with her black hair worn in cornrows and wearing a set of combat armor that has a crossed out heart on her chest plate. She is shown with a combat knife in hand and practicing some slashing attacks.
Also on hand to represent the Marines is Lance Corporal Samantha "Homewrecker" Johnston.
A hardened combatant and another survivor of the deadly USS Sulaco incident, Homewrecker knows what it takes to be a Marine.
"You have to be a special kind of tough to be one of us. At the end of the day, we know we're gonna be sent where no one else wants to go and that's what makes us so damn deadly," she nodded while twirling her knife.
The United Americas was established in 2104 following the merging of North, Central and South America as a response to the formation of the Three World Empire. It wasn't long before both forces were exploring and colonizing other planets. The United Americas Allied Command was created and its front line fighting force would be the United States Colonial Marines.
"The Marines were fighting from the get go. They were called in to help during the Torin Prime Civil War and fighting terrorist rebels called the J'har. It was a trial by fire and they proved themselves," Duke explained.
The Marines would reach their peak in 2165 during the Teintsin Campaign which saw over 240,000 Marines in active service. However, their numbers would decrease over the next fourteen years and they would be called in by the Weyland-Yutani Corporation as a private security force. In 2179, a team would arrive on LV-426, where they sustained heavy casualties against a new fearsome threat known as the Xenomorphs and would later on clash with a fearsome race of intergalactic hunters known as the Yautja, or "Predators."
"It's hard being a Colonial Marine and there's always the chance you might not be coming home at the end of a mission, but the Marines are hard people. Say what you will, but we will always fight to the last man," Homewrecker concluded.
The Colonial Marines tear through their monstrous enemies with a brutal assortment of futuristic firearms:
Short Range Melee: Combat Knife
Short Range Pistol: M4A3 Service Pistol
Mid-Range: M37A2 Pump-Action Shotgun
Long Range: M41A Pulse Rifle
Special Weapon: M56 Smartgun
Explosive Weapon: M40 HEDP Grenade
When both fighters were forced to fight up close with their enemies, they relied upon very different, yet brutal bladed weapons for cutting their enemies to shreds. For the Gears, they sawed through their enemies with a brutal flesh ripping upgrade on the old-fashioned bayonet, the Chainsaw Bayonet.
(A Gear is shown sawing a Drone in half with his chainsaw bayonet.)
Chainsaw Bayonet
Motorized Chain Mechanism
Length: 18 in.
Weight: 2 lbs.
J.D. walked over to the panelists with his rifle in hand before showing off the attached bayonet beneath the barrel. He stopped to rev the bayonet up before speaking.
"This is not your grandpa's bayonet. This will cut through any asshole in its path, be it human or Locust," J.D. Smirked.
"Man, I already feel sorry for the poor bastards on the business end of that," Eddie commented.
"Well then let's see how gruesome you can get with that bad boy," Bradley said gesturing towards two targets, "Up first, we have a pig carcass to demonstrate the effect this weapon would have on the closest thing to an actual human and then we have a ballistic gel torso outfitted in the standard-issue M3 Pattern Personal Armor worn by Colonial Marines in battle."
"Always happy for a demonstration," J.D. nodded as he took his position.
"Alright J.D., on 3...2...1, cut 'em up!"
J.D. turned the bayonet on and shoved the roaring bayonet into the pig's stomach in a gruesome display that sent blood and bits of flesh and bone flying everywhere until it was poking out of the pig's back.
With the pig torn apart, J.D. made his way towards the armored target and lunged forth with the saw tearing through the outer layers and he continued pressing harder until he was cutting through to the very bottom and rewarded by a torrent of blood from a deep rend beneath that eventually spilled the torso's innards onto the floor below.
"Man, what a mess," Bradley gasped.
"Leatherface, eat your heart out," Eddie commented.
"You tore through this guy's guts like they were nothing," Dr. Kaiser commented as he examined the tattered remnants of the pig carcass, "Very disturbing. To put a commonly used cliché to use, you went through this guy like a hot knife through butter."
He then went over to examine the armored torso, "The Marine's armor did offer some initial resistance to the bayonet, but ultimately the bayonet cut through and liquidized this guy's guts. You are two or two."
"Let's see you beat that," J.D. chuckled to Homewrecker.
"If you think that's going to intimidate a Colonial Marine, you're dead wrong!" she shot back.
When the Colonial Marine needed a last resort, he fell down to a long proven killer, the Combat Knife.
(A Colonial Marine is shown stabbing a Weyland-Yutani PMC repeatedly before drawing the blade across his throat.)
Combat Knife
Steel
Length: 12 in.
Weight: 1.3 lbs.
Homewrecker pulled her combat knife out of its sheath and gracefully twirled it.
"This is a standard utility knife that has served the Marines since our founding. It's not as flashy as the Gears' hedge trimmer, but it's all about survival in the end," she explained.
"Well it's going to be a similar test for you," Bradley explained motioning towards two targets, "Up first, we have another pig carcass for you to show what your knife can do. After that, we have a gel torso wearing the Gear's standard-issue armor. Let's see what you can do."
"Gladly," Homewrecker smirked as she took her position.
"Alright then, on 3...2...1, carve 'em up!"
Homewrecker launched herself at the pig carcass and buried her serrated blade into its throat before pulling it out and stabbing it once in the side before stabbing it in the gut and burying the blade in deep before bringing it down and tearing a deep gash in its abdomen before its innards came spilling out.
With the pig dealt with, the Marine made her way over to face the armored gel torso. She shot her blade out, yet it clanged off the armor's metallic surface and barely left a scratch behind.
"Screw this!" she said taking her knife and chucking it through the dummy's eye.
"Boring!" J.D. called out shaking his head.
Dr. Kaiser ignored the captain and made his way over to inspect the damage done to both targets, starting out with the pig carcass.
"Your first strike was an instant kill shot straight to this guy's windpipe. Your second strike is collapsing his lung, not an instant kill, but a potential mortal wound if he doesn't get treatment right away. Your last strike went deep enough to disembowel this guy, so he's dead from that right away."
He then made his way over to assess the armored target, "Your knife did nothing to get past this guy's armor. He might not feel anything at all," he said before reaching up to pull the knife out of the dummy's eye, "I believe this belongs to you," he said handing the knife back to Homewrecker. "Your blade destroyed this guy's eye and went deep enough to pierce his brain. Instant lights out."
"Gears are covered from head to toe in body armor. Good luck with that. You're basically bringing a needle to this fight," J.D. scoffed.
In addition to their melee weapons, both combatants packed trusted pistols. For the Marines, they packed the M4A3 Service Pistol.
(A Marine is shown firing several rounds into a facehugger.)
M4A3 Service Pistol
Semi-Automatic
Length: 8.25 in.
Weight: 2 lbs.
Cartridge: M901
Clip Size: 12 Rounds
But the Gears fire back with their own trusted killer, the MX8 Snub Pistol
(A Gear is shown dropping a Drone with several shots to the head.)
MX8 Snub Pistol
Semi-Automatic
Length: 13 in.
Weight: 5.5 lbs.
Cartridge: Kal. 50
Clip Size: 12 Rounds
Kait and Duke both stood at an outdoor firing range with their respective pistols in hand.
"The MX8 is the standard-issue pistol of all COG forces. It's not our deadliest weapon, but it has served us loyally for many years. It uses a Kal .50 round that can punch through most standard armor, similar to the .50 Action Express used by your Desert Eagles," Kait explained showing off her handgun.
"The M4A3 looks like a lot of the older pistols used in 20th century conflicts, but it can be customized in a number of different ways and can use different types of ammunition. Today, I've brought along M901 armor-piercing cartridges that can be used more effectively against armored opponents," Duke explained showing off his gun.
"We're going to test the weapons side by side and we've set up a shooting range for both of you to test your guns," Bradley explained motioning to the range behind him, "You each are being approached by 2 unarmored targets, and one of each that is clad in your opponent's armor. You will each have one clip to prove the lethality of both firearms."
Both experts nodded and took their positions.
"Kait, Duke, are you both ready?"
Both shouted back in unison.
"Then on 3...2...1, open fire!"
Both of them opened fire as their moving targets came into view, with Kait striking her first unarmored target three times in the chest, leaving deep craters in the bare surface where her bullets connected. The armored target then moved into view and she fired twice into its chest, her bullets appearing to punch through its cuirass before the third target moved into view and she managed to strike it three times. The first target then came back into view and she fired a round that tore through its jaw before two more rounds punched through the armored target's head and then she emptied her clip into the last target's face.
Duke meanwhile fired two shots that tore through his first target's chest before the armored target approached and he unloaded four rounds into it before it passed. The third target rolled into view and took three rounds to the chest before he focused again on the first target and pumped a round into its face, followed by a round that tore through the armored target's head and then he fired his last round into the third target's head before his gun clicked empty.
Both experts lowered their emptied weapons and waited as Dr. Kaiser made his way onto the range and looked over both targets.
"I don't even need to elaborate further on any of the head shots you delivered to each of your targets," the good doctor spoke as he observed the crumbling remnants of each skull before first venturing over to thoroughly inspect Kait's targets.
"You left some big craters in the chests of both your unarmored targets. These rounds you use are definitely on par with that of a Desert Eagle's in terms of stopping power," he said before making his way over to examine the armored target, "They also did their job in getting past this guy's armor. His lung is torn to shreds and his aorta has been punctured. Good job!"
He then made his way over to examine Duke's targets, "While you struck all your targets in vital areas for instant kills, I'm not seeing as much damage compared to the X8's rounds," he said before examining the armored target, "I'm seeing the same thing with this guy, his armor does eventually end up penetrated, but it takes more effort compared to the X8," he concluded as Kait smirked at Duke, who only shrugged.
Both short range weapons showed what they could do, but where do our panelists stand?
"Starting out with the melee weapons, I'm giving the edge to the chainsaw bayonet. While the knife does offer more options, you just cannot ignore the destructive power of the bayonet," Bradley started.
"Plus, the knife likely cannot get past the Gear's armor. Unless you somehow managed to get the Gear's helmet off, you're pretty much screwed. Edge Gears," Dr. Kaiser followed.
"The knife might offer more freedom of movement given that it's not an attachment of another weapon, but I'm with you in just not being able to overlook the sheer mess that is left behind by the bayonet. Edge Gears," Eddie concluded.
In short range melee weapons, the edge goes to the Gears with the Chainsaw Bayonet.
"Moving on to pistols, I'm giving the edge to the Gears due to their pistol's greater stopping power," Bradley started out.
"Both of these guns hold 12 rounds per clip, but the Marine's pistol can hold more than one type of round, including the ones we've seen today that are meant for armored foes. I'm calling this one even," Dr. Kaiser countered.
The tiebreaker would fall down to Eddie.
"I'm with Bradley on this one. The X8's rounds did far more damage compared to the service pistols."
In short range pistols, the edge goes to the Gears with the MX8 Snub Pistol.
Coming up, the battle for supremacy continues between two futuristic fighting forces.
XXXXXXX
The Gears and the Colonial Marines, two elite front line forces who face off against monstrous adversaries.
"If it were up to the Gears, the Xenomorphs would have gone extinct a long time ago," J.D. Proclaimed.
"The Gears were too quick to declare victory and then look what happened with the Swarm coming around," Duke replied.
When things got tougher in close range situations, both fighters relied upon deadly shotguns to cut a path of devastation through the hordes.
For the Colonial Marines, they relied upon a tried and proven killer, the M37A2 Pump-Action Shotgun.
(A Colonial Marine is shown firing a blast into a Xenomorph's chest before following up with another barrage to its face.)
M37A2 Pump-Action Shotgun
Pump-Action
Length: 22 in.
Weight: 6.1 lbs.
Cartridge: 12-Gauge Shells
Clip Size: 8 Rounds
"It's simple, but effective. It don't matter if you're human, Xenomorph, or Predator, you get on the business end of this bad boy, you're gonna get hurt," Homewrecker explained showing off her shotgun for the panelists.
"This is another test we've set up involving multiple targets," Bradley said motioning to the range behind him, "We're going to have 2 targets come rushing right at you, one unarmored, and the other clad in the armor of a charging Gear. You've got an entire tube's worth of shells to prove your point."
"Well, then bring them on!" Homewrecker replied pumping her shotgun and getting into position.
"Then on 3...2...1, release the Gears!"
Homewrecker waited as the first gel torso came towards her on a motorized platform operated by Eddie. She took aim and fired a blast into its chest before following up with another one to its stomach and a third blast that snapped its head back, nearly ripping it off the steel rod holding it in place.
She then set her sights on the armored target and fired a blast into its chest before pumping again and following up with another shot to the same area. She repeated the pumping motion and fired a blast into its stomach before going higher and firing a blast into the dummy's head, knocking its helmet off.
"Damn, you wasted no time on the poor bastard," Eddie commented.
"I never show mercy," she smirked.
Dr. Kaiser made his way over to assess the damage done to both targets, starting with the unarmored.
"Your first blast is an instant kill, tearing through this guy's lung, aorta and heart all at once. Your second just liquefied this guy's intestines. Your last shot," Dr. Kaiser knelt down to pick up a shredded remnant of the target's face, "You literally shredded this guy's face off."
He then made his way over to the armored target and inspected the breached armor, "You managed to penetrate this guy's armor and you have a kill," he said before kneeling down to pick up the Gear's helmet, "Although, I don't think this would happen in an actual battle."
"And you wouldn't stand a chance in an actual battle with a Gear coming at you like that. Our shotgun would cut your boys down where they stand," Kait said stepping forth.
To answer the Marines' challenge, the Gears fire back with a deadly killer of there own that has stopped many a Locust in their tracks, the Gnasher Shotgun.
(A Gear is shown blowing a Drone's head off with a point blank blast.)
Gnasher Shotgun
Lever-Action
Length: 26 in.
Weight: 6.7 lbs.
Cartridge: 12-Gauge Shells
Clip Size: 8 Rounds
"You need one of those Locust freaks turned to fertilizer? This is your go to weapon right here," Kait said showing off the Gnasher, "It's quick to fire and quick to reload."
"It's the same test for you, one unarmored and the other wearing the Marine's battle gear," Bradley spoke.
"Then what are we waiting for?" Kait asked getting into position.
"Alright, on 3...2...1, release the Marines!"
The first target moved towards Kait, who then took aim and fired a blast that left a crater in the dummy's chest, before working the lever action and firing another blast into its chest and followed by a third that blew a chunk of its face off.
She then set her sights on the armored target and fired a blast into its chest, followed by another, and then ending with a blast that caught the target in its face.
"Say goodnight," she said to the target as the ballistic helmet finally fell of its head.
Dr. Kaiser made his way over to assess the damage done to the targets and again started with the unarmored target, "All of your shots on this guy are instant kills, and done with roughly the same hard-hitting impact," he said before kneeling down to pick up the other side of the target's ballistic gel face. He could only sigh and shake his head before approaching the armored target.
"Your shotgun did its job and tore through this guy's armor," he said reaching down for the fallen ballistic helmet and handing it to Duke, "I believe this belongs to you."
"Thanks," Duke grunted, accepting the mangled helmet.
Both shotguns showed off their devastating stopping power, but where do our panelists stand in the end?
"These are two hard-hitting weapons that are just brutal in close quarters and tore through their target's armor with deadly ferocity. I'm calling this even," Bradley started.
"I'm with you. Both have 8 shots and share roughly the same effective range. Even," Dr. Kaiser seconded.
"The difference between pump-action and lever-action really did nothing to stand between the effectiveness of both guns. Edge, even," Eddie concluded.
In mid-ranged weapons, are warriors are even.
When the battle went to long range, both warriors had trusted assault rifles they used to tear through the legions of alien creatures attacking them from all sides.
For the Gears, they had their staple weapon that dropped many a Locust in their wake, the Mark 2 Lancer.
(A Gear is shown tearing through a Bolter Drone with a salvo from his Lancer.)
Mark 2 Lancer Assault Rifle
Full Auto
Length: 36 in.
Weight: 9 lbs.
Cartridge: 7.62×51mm
Clip Size: 50 Rounds
"This is the bread and butter weapon of the Gears," J.D. explained showing off his Lancer, "It's so reliable that even the Locust used them."
"It looks pretty dangerous and we want to see just how lethal it can be," Bradley said motioning to the course set up behind him. "Here we have an outpost that has been overrun by Xenomorphs, 5 of them altogether, and it's your job to wipe them out."
"Not a problem," J.D. nodded and got into position.
"Alright, then on 3...2...1, storm the outpost!"
J.D. made his approach and fired a burst into the chest of the first alien target as it popped into view before another target suddenly appeared and he followed up with a volley into its face. He then broke into a run further into the outpost area, where another target popped out that was quickly met by a barrage into its face, then another popping out that was met by a flurry to the face and then he found the last target and emptied what remained of its clip into its chest and head.
"Done!" JD called out.
Dr. Kaiser made his way over to assess the damage done, "I am counting 6 rounds in a close cluster in this guy's chest. He is . before you even get him to the morgue...or wherever you send the dead Xenomorphs."
He then inspected the other targets, "This guy's face is obliterated. It's hard to tell how many rounds you fired specifically given the double shots as well. Either way, he's toast. I'm seeing a repeat with your next two targets. Your last guy, you just went total ape shit on and it's safe to say he's not getting back up."
"Good luck with that. It wouldn't be that easy with an actual Xenomorph. Those bastards are lightning fast and sneaky as hell," Homewrecker spoke up.
"Not to forget that they also have acid blood. If you got that close to them and went hog wild like that, your skin would be burning off right now," Duke added.
"Keep talking. I'd like to see what you can come up with, heh!" J.D. Responded.
"Oh, we do have something that will out shoot little toy by miles...and one that will still keep firing while you're reloading," Duke answered.
To answer the Gears' challenge, the Marines fire back with a high-capacity killer that has become their trademark, the M41A Pulse Rifle.
(A Colonial Marine is shown firing a salvo of bullets into a Xenomorph that attempted to ambush him.)
M41A Pulse Rifle
Full Auto
Length: 33 in.
Weight: 10 lbs.
Cartridge: 10×24mm Caseless
Clip Size: 99 Rounds
"This is every Marine's best friend," Duke said showing off the pulse rifle for the panelists, "This bad boy uses ten millimeter armor-piercing ammo and in addition, is typically fitted with a grenade launcher for double the pain."
"Alright, it's going to be the same test for you Duke, only it's 5 Drones on the attack. You have a full clip to show what your rifle can do," Bradley explained.
Duke nodded and got into position before looking over to J.D., "Be ready to take notes."
"Alright Duke, on 3...2...1, take 'em down!"
Duke broke into a run until he encountered the first target and fired a burst that decimated its head before the second target popped out and he tore through its chest in rapid succession. He ran further into the outpost until he was confronted by the third target and fired another barrage into its chest before the fourth target popped out and he tore through its chest and stomach and then he found the last target, where he depressed the trigger and fired a final barrage that tore apart the target's torso and face.
"Done!" Duke called out.
Dr. Kaiser made his way over to assess the damage done to all targets, "Your bullets just slammed through this guy's head. It's hard to tell how many rounds you put into him unless I were to go rooting through. I'll just keep it short and simple, it's a kill."
He then went over to inspect the other targets, "Your second guy's chest has been torn apart, as was the same case with your third guy. It's like their organs were sent through a blender. My god, this damage is just insane," he said before making his way over to the fourth target, "The holes here are bigger compared to the Lancer's thanks to the explosive tips on your ammo," he said before looking over to the last target and how it was worse off than the others, "Yeah, I'm not gonna have to go there. Altogether, you are 5 for 5."
Both rifles made mince meat of their targets, but where do our panelists stand in the end?
"I'm with the pulse rifle all the way thanks to its freakishly large clip. 99 rounds? You could keep firing after the Lancer is out. Edge Marines," Bradley started.
"The more powerful armor-piercing, explosive tip rounds are just devastating. Edge Marines," Eddie seconded.
"More power equals more trauma, the Marines take this hands down," Dr. Kaiser concluded.
In long range weapons, the Colonial Marines take the edge with the M41A Pulse Rifle.
Coming up, two dangerous special weapons are brought to the table and then later, things go boom when explosives are tested for all to see.
XXXXXX
The Gears and the Colonial Marines, two elite forces who combat threats all over the known galaxy.
Teamwork is essential given the kind of unpredictable threats they face, but when it came down to it, they also relied upon deadly special weapons to take out large groups that would swarm them at once.
For the Colonial Marines, they relied upon a general purpose machine gun, the M56 Smartgun.
(A Marine is shown dropping two charging Xenomorphs in one flurry with his smartgun.)
M56 Smartgun
Fully Automatic or 4-Round Burst
Length: 48 in.
Weight: 39 lbs.
Cartridge: 10×28mm Caseless
Clip Size: 500 Rounds
"This is another trademark of the Colonial Marines, the M56 Smartgun," Homewrecker explained showing off the massive gun to the panelists, "This isn't just any ordinary machine gun. It comes equipped with an auto aiming feature that allows for accurate, autonomous aiming. Anything comes within range, the gun aims itself."
"Well we'd like to see how lethal your smartgun is and we've got an oncoming horde for you to test it against," Bradley said motioning towards 5 targets lined up like bowling pins from a safe distance away.
"You won't need to be guessing for long," Homewrecker said getting into position.
"Alright Homewrecker, on 3...2...1, tear 'em up!"
Homewrecker depressed the trigger and the bullets flew out of her smartgun, tearing through the assembled targets like they were nothing and in the end of her volley, they were either reduced to Swiss Cheese, or small clusters of foam.
"Damn, just like lightning!" Eddie exclaimed.
"You just tore through those targets and with remarkable accuracy for a machine gun," Bradley added.
"Not to mention you left barely anything to the imagination. These guys are dead before they hit the ground," Dr. Kaiser concluded.
"The Gears would be burning down the whole house around you with our special weapon. Good luck trying to escape that," J.D. commented from the sidelines.
To answer the Marines' challenge, the Gears heat things up with their special weapon, the Scorcher Flamethrower.
(A Gear is shown roasting a Savage Drone with a torrent of flames from his Scorcher.)
Scorcher Flamethrower
Continuous Spray
Length: 44 in.
Weight: 43 lbs.
Cartridge: Fuel
Clip Size: 350 Shots
J.D. stood at a safe distance from the panelists and fired an arc of flame into the air to show off the Scorcher's range.
"This is a dry chemical flamethrower that was typically carried by our Locust enemies. Anything gets in our way, it's up in smoke before you can blink," he explained.
"Alright, it's the same test for you J.D. You've got an oncoming horde and we want to see what you can do," Bradley explained.
"I won't fail you," J.D. said getting into position, albeit at a closer distance compared to Homewrecker.
"On 3...2...1, light 'em up!"
J.D. stepped forth and depressed the trigger, launching a stream of flames upon the 5 gathered targets, quickly swallowing them up in a blaze that reduced the foam targets to cinders within seconds.
"Now all we need is some marshmallows and some weenies and we're complete," Eddie commented.
"But you do realize they have to get much closer with that little toy of theirs don't you? We'd be cutting them down where they stand before they knew what hit 'em!" Homewrecker piped in.
Both special weapons showed off their vastly different abilities, but where do our panelists stand?
"For me, it's the Smartgun all the way. It has the better range, whereas the flamethrower is more so meant for closer range. Edge Marines," Bradley started.
"While the thought of being on fire and seeing your colleagues on fire can have a deadly psychological effect, still, the farther effective range of the smartgun wins it for me in the end. Edge Marines," Dr. Kaiser seconded.
"The smartgun wins it for me especially with its auto aiming feature, whereas with the Scorcher, it's basically spray and pray. Edge Marines," Eddie concluded.
In special weapons, the Colonial Marine takes the edge with the M56 Smartgun.
And finally, when our warriors wanted to end things with a bang, they relied upon deadly explosives to wipe out hordes of their unearthly enemies.
For the Gears, they relied upon a unique take upon the classic grenade with a medieval twist, the Bolo Grenade.
(A Gear is shown twirling a bolo grenade overhead before tossing it into an oncoming trio of Drones and it explodes, killing all of them.)
Bolo Grenade
Semtex
Length: 18 in.
Weight: 1.5 lbs.
Blast Radius: 10 m
"This is a grenade that no Gear is caught dead without," Kait said pulling out a bolo grenade and showing it to the panelists, "It's design is similar to that of a medieval flail, three parts connected by chains. You swing it around above your head and give it a good toss."
"I've never seen a design like this before," Eddie commented.
"We've set up a small, enclosed space with three pigs inside. You've got one attempt to show us what that grenade can do," Bradley said motioning towards the enclosure.
"You got it," Kait nodded and got into position as the others looked on from a safe distance.
She primed the grenade and began twirling it overhead before launching it into the enclosure and it detonated, shredding the three pig carcasses apart. When the dust settled, the panelists walked over to survey the carnage.
"Damn, that's brutal," Bradley commented.
"You just tore through these guys, including one of them being cut in half," Dr. Kaiser motioned towards one of the carcasses, "You would be 3 for 3 with this one."
"It's deadly, no doubt about that, but with our explosive you don't have to mess around. One pump of a grenade launcher, and it's curtains," Duke spoke up.
Answering the challenge, the Marines fire back with their own miniature weapon of mass destruction, the M40 HEDP Grenade.
(A Marine is shown firing a blast from his grenade launcher at an attacking Yautja Hunter.)
M40 HEDP Grenade
Semtex
Length: 2.5 in.
Weight: 10 oz.
Blast Radius: 5 m
Duke stepped forth and pulled out a grenade, "This is a grenade commonly used by Colonial Marines. You can either toss it like a typical hand grenade, or you can launch it via the U1 grenade launcher," he said, again pulling out the pulse rifle and now showing off the grenade launcher attachment at the bottom and pumping it.
"Alright Duke, it's the same test for you. One grenade is all we need," Bradley spoke.
"Right on," Duke said getting into position.
Duke flipped off the red plastic cap and depressed the button before tossing it into the enclosure and running for safety. Three seconds later the grenade detonated and the pigs were decimated by the blast. When the dust settled, the panelists made their way over to survey the aftermath.
"The same kind of carnage as before," Dr. Kaiser spoke as he examined the shredded corpses.
"But their blast radius wasn't as wide reaching as the bolo grenade's," Eddie added as Kait smirked from the background.
"Then we'd just load it into our grenade launcher. Problem solved," Duke rebutted.
Both grenades showed off their destructive capabilities, but where do our panelists stand?
"Without question these grenades do the job. While the Bolo does have the wider blast radius, a user can waste valuable time by having to twirl it beforehand to build up the momentum. With the M40, you can load it into a launcher and one pump later, it's all done. Edge Marines," Bradley started.
"The Bolo does look like it could act like a stick grenade based upon its design, I'm still sold by the versatility of the M40 with being able to use it as both a traditional hand grenade and firing it from a launcher. Edge Marines," Dr. Kaiser seconded.
"Both deadly without question, but the M40's versatility wins me over too. Edge Marines," Eddie concluded.
In explosive weapons, the Colonial Marines take the edge with the M40 HEDP Grenade.
As it is with all warriors, there is a critical X-factor that makes them who they are. For the Gears, it is their experience through a constant state of warfare.
"The Gears went through a war that lasted 79 years, followed by a 14 year conflict with the Locust Horde on top of that, then the arrival of the Swarm. They have constantly had to remained sharp and focused, knowing there is always a threat lurking nearby," JD explained.
For the Colonial Marines, it is their triumph through sheer adversity.
"We truly have one of the most dangerous jobs in the entire galaxy. All of the major conflicts we've been involved in, we've sustained heavy casualties, whether we're fighting against rebels, those sneaky Xenomorph bastards, or those ugly Predator freaks. We've never backed down from a fight, period," Homewrecker explained.
Coming up, two fierce intergalactic front line forces collide to determine who is "The Fictional Deadliest Warrior!"
XXXXXX
With our testing complete and our X-factors evaluated, we are now one step closer to determining who will be "The Fictional Deadliest Warrior."
Our teams tested 6 weapons used by the Gears: the Chainsaw Bayonet, MX8 Snub Pistol, Gnasher Shotgun, Mark 2 Lancer assault rifle, the Scorcher flamethrower, and Bolo Grenades.
On the opposite side, 6 weapons used by the Colonial Marines were tested: the Combat Knife, the M4A3 service pistol, M37A2 Pump-Action Shotgun, M41A pulse rifle, the M56 Smartgun, and the M40 HEDP grenade.
In short range melee weapons, the Chainsaw Bayonet sawed through the Combat Knife.
EDGE: Gears
In short range pistols, the MX8's superior stopping power felled the M4A3.
EDGE: Gears
In mid-ranged weapons, both shotguns met each other round for round.
EDGE: Even
In long ranged weapons, the M41A Pulse Rifle's extra rounds punched through the Lancer.
EDGE: Colonial Marines
For special weapons, the Smartgun's auto aiming and superior range cut down the Scorcher.
EDGE: Colonial Marines
And lastly, the M40's versatility allowed it to blow away the Bolo Grenade.
EDGE: Colonial Marines
Our scientists and weapons experts are done with their testing. The results are in and the time has come to decide who will be the victor. The battle will be fought in a 6-on-6 squad battle between 6 COG Gears and 6 Colonial Marines. To ensure the battle won't be decided by a single lucky blow, the battle will be simulated one thousand times in a duel to the death.
Who will win in a battle between two elite futuristic infantry units?
Coalition of Ordered Governments
(A group of Gears are shown defending a high-ranking official.)
vs.
United Americas
(A group of Colonial Marines are shown cutting through a group of armed rebels.)
Tactical Minded
(A group of Gears are shown plotting a raid on a Locust stronghold.)
vs. Explosive Offense
(A group of Colonial Marines are shown charging into a Xenomorph nest, cutting through the defending beasts.)
"Everything is set. Let's rock n' roll!" Eddie said before typing in a few commands and hitting the 'ENTER' key.
XXXXXX
On a distant planet, a M577 armored personnel carrier pulls up to the gates of a settlement and a group of six heavily armed soldiers in green armor emerges, the group's point man carrying a M56 smartgun, while four others are carrying M41A pulse rifles with attached U1 grenade launchers, and the last man is carrying a M37A2 pump-action shotgun.
They are members of the United States Colonial Marines and they have been dispatched to investigate following a loss of contact with the colony the week prior.
The smart gunner and the other pulse rifle-toting troopers approach the main gate and form a protective perimeter around the group's shotgunner as he approaches a control panel and uses a small PDA-like device to hack into the system and open the gate. Once they have been granted entry, they proceed in an orderly fashion towards a large gray building at the center of the settlement.
Colonial Marines: 6
Deep within the bowels of the building, the last Locust Drone falls after taking a round to the forehead compliments of an MX8 snub pistol.
The user is a man in mostly gray armor with dark blue accents and a matching helmet. He looks over to 5 other men clad in similar outfits, one of whom is armed with a Scorcher flamethrower and another with a Gnasher shotgun, while the rest are equipped with Mark 2 Lancer assault rifles with chainsaw bayonets attached.
These men are Gears sent by the Coalition of Ordered Governments to investigate the area following reports of suspected Locust activity in the sector. They now stand in a room littered with the corpses of Locust Drones, confirming their suspicions.
Gears: 6
The leader placed a hand to his helmet and spoke into the comm unit, "Home Base, this is Alpha One. The Locust threat has been dealt with. Awaiting extraction. Over!"
"Roger that. Evac inbound."
The lead Gear nodded to his men and they exited the room, headed for the designated evac point.
Unknown to them, one of the fallen Drones began to spasm with life and shot his eyes open. The beast could only manage a weak gasp before his chest ripped open.
Elsewhere, the Marines have entered the large facility and are sticking close to one another as they search for any signs of the missing colonists. They continue their movement and are about to approach the stairs leading to a lower level when the smart gunner's motion tracker suddenly whines to life.
"Sarge, we've got company! Dead ahead. I'm picking up six of them!" the gunner piped up.
"Look alive, boys!" the Marine sergeant called out to his men and they readied their weapons.
The Gears stepped into view to find the Marines waiting for them and quickly raised their weapons, a flurry of gunfire exchanged between both sides that saw the Marine smart gunner dropping a Gear trooper as the bullets tore through him with ease, his armor doing nothing to protect him. On the flip side, one of the Gears fired a volley from his Lancer that tore through the chest and stomach of the nearest Marine.
Gears: 5 – Colonial Marines: 5
All combatants fell back behind whatever cover they could find and the back and forth shootout continued. Needing desperately to gain some ground for his men, the Marine sergeant reaches for a M40 HEDP grenade strapped to his bandoleer and quickly flips the red cap off. He pushes the button and tosses it near a large crate where he hears hurried voices coming from behind.
The grenade detonates and two of the Gears are affected by the blast, one of them far enough away to only be stunned, while the other is killed by the shockwave.
Gears: 4 – Colonial Marines: 5
"Fall back!" the Gears leader calls out before he runs out into the open while firing a burst. He makes his way over to the stunned soldier and helps the man back to his feet while the Scorcher carrying Gear fires an arc of flame to deter the Marines from advancing as they make their retreat further into the base.
"After them!" the Marine sergeant shouts when the flames cease, the smart gunner at his side as they make chase.
The surviving Gears are forced to retreat to the lower level they have just emerged from with the Marines hot on their tail, the Marine sergeant and smart gunner emerging and firing simultaneously, forcing the armored men into cover.
One of the Gears sees the Marine smart gunner within range and reaches for a Bolo grenade, priming it and swinging it around before rising to his feet. The smart gunner turned to face him and fire, yet the bolo entangled his legs and caused him to lose his balance. There was no time for the man to rise back to his feet as the grenade detonated and blew him in half.
Gears: 4 – Colonial Marines: 4
The Marine sergeant was forced away as his remaining colleagues arrived and the bullets continued to fly with one of the Marines pumping his attached grenade launcher and firing another M40 grenade that sent the Gears scrambling and allowing the Marines to press further in.
The Scorcher carrying Gear finds himself next to his Gnasher armed colleague and they nod to each other when they see one of the Marines prowling nearby. The two men split up in separate directions in an effort to flank the man.
They both crept along the large storage container they hid behind until they were at their respective ends, the shotgunner stepping out first and firing a barrage of buckshot that sent the Marine running for cover, only to find himself stepping into a wall of fire.
Gears: 4 – Colonial Marines: 3
The Marine shotgunner saw what happened to his colleague and raised his M37A2, firing a blast at the Gears with fragments of buckshot hitting the Scorcher, yet only stunning him and forcing him to fall back as the Gnasher Gear leaped towards him with a barrage of buckshot and began chasing after him.
The Marine exited the large room through a side door and found himself in a dormitory, where the Gear was right on his tail and fired another barrage towards him as he ducked behind some bunks and popped out to fire another blast, yet missed and was again forced to duck as another blast from the Gnasher obliterated the shelf he was hiding behind. He fell to his side and tried to pull himself out of the way, yet fragments from another blast shredded his left leg just beneath his knee cap, leaving him screaming in pain.
With his opponent unable to continue, the Gear fired a blast into his chest.
Gears: 4 – Colonial Marines: 2
The Scorcher Gear still struggled after being struck by the fragments following the previous attack and was able to reconnect with his colleague as he emerged from the dormitory, yet he was cut down in a hail of pulse rifle fire and the Gnasher was knocked from the other Gear's hands, left damaged beyond repair.
Gears: 3 – Colonial Marines: 2
With a frustrated grunt, the Gear was left reaching for his MX8 sidearm and firing back at the attacking Marine, only to be halted as he heard a pump come from behind and he turned to find the Marine sergeant standing there with a furrowed brow before he launched another M40 HEDP grenade into his armored adversary.
Gears: 2 – Colonial Marines: 2
The sergeant looked over to his colleague and with a nod ran over to join him, the superior picking up two additional blips on his motion tracker.
The duo made their way into a nearby cafeteria, only to be met by another Bolo being tossed their way and forcing them to split up.
The grenade detonated with another deafening boom, yet they were behind cover and saved from the following shrapnel.
The Gear leader and his remaining subordinate stood with their Lancers at the ready and opened fire at the first signs of movement. They watched as the Marines split and he began shooting it out with the enemy fleeing to his right, while his subordinate went after the other.
The lead Gear grimaced as a the bullets struck the metallic surfaces around him, but he continued firing back as he chased after the fleeing Marine, following him into a large kitchen where their bullets tore through the machines and shelves around them until his rifle clicked empty, yet the Marine continued firing.
He had to think up a plan fast and looked over to find the walk-in freezer door left wide open. Pulling out his MX8, he fired a bullet to draw the Marine in and made his way inside.
The Marine saw the opened freezer and cautiously made his way inside, maneuvering around the spoiled suspended slabs of meat as he hunted for his target. The room was much larger than it appeared from outside and he crept around listening for any signs of his enemy.
A loud metallic clang rang out and the Marine jumped, whirling around with his rifle and firing a burst at a threat he believed was behind him. Yet he looked up only to find an empty meat hook dangling above him and a tin can lying beneath it.
The bone jarring revving of a motor rang out and the Marine fell backwards as the Gear advanced upon him with his chainsaw bayonet roaring to life.
The Marine had dropped his pulse rifle in the confusion and reached for his combat knife out of desperation, taking it flinging it at his armored opponent while he reached for the M4A3 strapped to his side.
The knife bounced off of the Gear's armor and he whipped the man with the stock of his rifle before he could raise his pistol and then brought his buzzing blade down onto the man's collarbone, cutting in as deep as the blade would go until blood and bits of skin and viscera were splattered all around them.
Gears: 2 – Colonial Marines: 1
The Marine sergeant saw his own confrontation with the other remaining Gear spilling into a control room, where both men fired upon each other from behind computer panels, sparks raining down from all angles as the bullets flew wildly. It was a war of attrition which neither side was willing to cede any ground, yet both men were fiercely determined.
The Gear's rifle clicked empty and he would find himself forced to his MX8, yet the Marine popped out and fired a volley that rained glass, plastic chunks and sparks down upon him him and forcing him to his feet while blind firing with his gun and causing him to collide with a nearby circuit breaker and the electrical shock that followed, leaving him open to a fatal flurry from the sergeant's pulse rifle.
Gears: 1 – Colonial Marines: 1
The last Gear attempted to get in touch with headquarters, yet was getting nothing but static as he made his way through another corridor and then found himself on a catwalk in a large cavernous room where he could hear the whir of machinery beneath him. His only objective now was to reach the designated rendezvous point.
He was cut off from his train of thought as the ear-splitting rattle of gunfire came and the bullets bounced off the metallic surface around him. He looked over to see the Marine sergeant entered the room and quickly returned fire, yet the sergeant dove for cover behind some metal crates and loaded a fresh grenade into his launcher, popping out and firing it in the Gear's direction.
The grenade missed the Gear, yet it struck a nearby support cable and sent the armored man bolting as the catwalk started to fall out behind him and he landed on a more stable section not far from the Marine. The Marine raised his rifle to open fire, yet the Gear dashed him and delivered a shoulder tackle that knocked the man from his feet.
The Marine sergeant hit the metal hard and his pulse rifle was knocked from his hands and dangerously close to tumbling over the side into the abyss below. He reached out for it, yet a loud revving caught his attention and he turned to find the Gear standing tall over him with his chainsaw bayonet running wild.
There was no way for him to reach his pulse rifle and with no other choice, he reached for the M4A3 strapped to his side and fired a trio of shots into the Gear's armored midsection before going higher and emptying his clip into the man's chest and covered head, the bullets piercing the helmet's weakest portions. The Gear was dead on the spot and his lifeless body tumbled backwards over the railing and into the abyss with a sickening crunch.
Gears: 0 - Colonial Marines: 1
Rising to his feet, the Marine sergeant pumped his fists into the air and cried out "OORAH!"
XXXXXX
Winner: Colonial Marines
Colonial Marines:
Combat Knife: 1
M4A3 Service Pistol: 14
M37A2 Pump-Action Shotgun: 62
M41A Pulse Rifle: 240
M56 Smartgun: 168
M40 HEDP Grenade: 50
Total: 535
COG Gears:
Chainsaw Bayonet: 18
MX8 Snub Pistol: 22
Gnasher Shotgun: 70
Mark 2 Lancer Assault Rifle: 190
Scorcher Flamethrower: 120
Bolo Grenade: 45
Total: 465
"It was a fairly close matchup, but ultimately the Colonial Marines prevailed thanks to the combined assault of their pulse rifle, their smartgun and grenades that could be fired farther thanks to their pulse rifle's launcher.
"While the Gears performed better in short and mid-range and were better armored, the explosive tip caseless rounds used by the Marines were able to pierce their armor and negate their advantage. In the end, it was another brutal, yet hard fought victory for the Colonial Marines," Bradley concluded.
"The Gears could care less what some 90 pound computer geek says. On the battlefield, we are proven," J.D. grunted.
"The Gears were tougher than we thought, but the Colonial Marines never back down. We will fight 'til we win. Semper Fi!" Duke shouted.
(The Marine sergeant has reclaimed his pulse rifle and now stands on the tarmac as he sees the evac aircraft approaching from a distance. A sudden rumble from behind catches his attention and he turns to find himself confronted by a newborn Locust-Xenomorph hybrid ready to tear him apart. With a defiant shout, he raises his rifle for another battle.)
XXXXXX
Next time on "Fictional Deadliest Warrior," two criminal masterminds clash in a battle for supremacy:
(An Arabic man with graying black hair and piercing green eyes dressed in an elaborate green and gold robe swings a scimitar at the screen.)
Ra's al Ghul: The immortal leader of the League of Assassins, who has made it his personal mission to cleanse the world of evil...
vs.
(An Asian man wearing a kabuto and armor covered in a multitude of sharpened blades swings a katana at the screen.)
The Shredder: The archnemesis of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, who seeks to eradicate his sworn enemies and then conquer the world.
Who will be "The Fictional Deadliest Warrior?!"
XXXXXXXXXX
Author's Note: And so ends another installment of "Fictional Deadliest Warrior" after yet another long wait, but I still have a few ideas in mind and I'm definitely not hurting for future battles.
John "Duke" Cameron and Samantha "Homewrecker" Johnston were both characters in "Aliens: Infestation," a 2D side-scroller game for the Nintendo DS.
I had planned to give the Scorcher to the Gears initially as their special weapon, but then for a time I had second thoughts about possibly giving them the Mulcher instead, but I backed off as I didn't know much about it at the time. I had reached out to other users on here about if they knew any more about it and if they thought the outcome would have been any different, but either they had not played any of the "Gears" games in quite a while, or they got back to me too late by the time I was already halfway through writing the battle out.
Either way, I still think the Marines would have taken the edge as their M56 Smartgun would have carried more bullets (depending upon which medium you go by) and the Mulcher used a hand cranking mechanism that would have taken longer for the gun to warm up and probably have been more draining on the user. So in the end, it probably wouldn't have made much difference anyway.
As for all the usual legal mumbo jumbo, the Gears and all "Gears of War" references are owned by Epic Games and the Colonial Marines and all "Aliens vs. Predator" references are owned by Disney.
With apologies to Gears of War fans.
This is Metal Harbinger telling all of you to keep it fucking METAL, and if I'm not back to all of you by then, Happy Halloween!