Good morning, lovlies! Thank you so much to Mel!
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Edward
"Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light."
― Kamand Kojouri
I'd been at the Academy since I was a baby, which meant that there was no shortage of balls or important events I'd been forced into. If you'd seen one, you'd seen them all.
The tux I was required to wear was stiff, the collar feeling closer to a noose as I thought about Bella trying to sneak into the archives.
What was happening? Was she getting anywhere? What would happen if she got caught? Would she talk?
To chase the anxiety away, I drank—flute after flute of champagne before I switched to something stronger. No one would stop me. My parents weren't here—thank God—and there was no one who came close to their level of authority over me.
The night dragged on, a small reprieve coming for only a moment when Rosalie entered the ballroom in the most provocative sheer dress she could find, an absolute neanderthal on her arm.
I caught sight of Walter Hale's face, saw his fury, and snorted. Rosalie was a girl playing with fire because she wanted to be burned.
People came up to me, trying to strike up a conversation—three finance moguls, at least five celebrities, and one world leader paraded in front of me, trying to tempt me into giving them the time of day. I was supposed to be representing my parents, supposed to be filtering this bullshit for any nugget worthwhile enough to bring back to the family boardroom.
But I ignored everyone, downing my drinks and pacing the edges of the ballroom like a caged tiger.
A little after ten, I couldn't take it anymore, excusing myself out onto the terrace where the cool night air was bracing, forcing my cloudy mind to clear for a moment.
This was what the rest of my life was going to be like: pointless parties listening to meaningless drabble from people who didn't matter.
My eyes squeezed shut as my chest constricted around my lungs at the thought.
In the gardens below, there was a gunshot followed by a loud shout. "Stop!"
My eyes shot open, my vision blurry in the dark. I didn't have to wonder long though because shortly thereafter, Bella sprinted in my direction, looking flushed and disheveled in the ugliest fucking dress I'd ever seen.
"Bella?"
She looked up at me, and I was struck by the fear in her eyes. She looked like a rabbit, running from wolves. My body moved on instinct, racing toward her. "What's going on?"
The guards chasing Bella caught up with us, and as they explained what was going on, my eyes kept wandering back to Bella's face. Wide, terrified eyes, her lips parted as she panted. But despite her very obvious fear, there was something bold and defiant in her stance.
She wasn't going down without a fight.
"You're not taking her anywhere," I said, surprised at the words that tumbled out of me. I looked up to see the guards glance at each other uncertainly. "She's been here at the ball all night until she stepped outside for some fresh air." The lie was effortless as it rolled off my tongue, though it felt like tiny barbs were digging into my lungs as I did the one thing I promised Bella I couldn't do.
It wasn't just idiotic to have her back; it was fucking dangerous. Loyalty was too high a price, and here I was paying it like a fucking moron.
Like I didn't have every-fucking-thing to lose.
"Sir, we ask that—"
"My parents are inside," I lied once more, steeling myself to what I'd done. There was no turning back now. I had to see this through. "Would you like to ask them? I'm sure they would love to have their time wasted over your incompetence."
That ended it. The threat of meeting the terrifying Carlisle Cullen or facing down the cold fury of Esme Platt was enough to send anyone running. Anyone with sense, that was.
The guards retreated, and I felt my fear and confusion turn to anger. How dare Bella extract any sort of loyalty from me.
"You better have something," I snarled, the words searing my tongue as I hurled them at Bella. She squared her shoulders, her jaw setting in a now familiar stubborn glare.
"I don't."
I felt the world tilt out from under me. "What?"
"I didn't have enough time. I couldn't find what you wanted."
No, no, no, no. This was my last hope, my only fucking hope.
I swore, pacing away from her. The alcohol and adrenaline were mingling in me, choking my words as I muttered to myself. No, everything I'd done had been useless. I was fucking useless.
"I'm not fucking useless."
I whirled around, a little bit stunned, wondering if Bella had somehow read my fucking mind. She was spitting mad, her eyes narrowed. "I'm a human fucking being, and I will never put my life on the line to sate your idle curiosity."
She turned then and stormed back down toward the gardens, leaving confused as hell. What just happened?
I stood on the terrace long after Bella stomped off, trying to piece together any sort of plan of what to do next. Because I had to have a plan. I couldn't just give up.
When nothing came to me, I went back inside. The party was still raging, but I was in no fucking mood for it. Grabbing a bottle of scotch off the bar, I left the ballroom, heading back to my room to try to drown my problems for one more night.
…
I expected a savage hangover in the morning, but when I awoke, I felt fine, as if I hadn't downed the equivalent of two bottles of scotch last night.
Maybe I was still drunk.
Last night had been a bust, one that I was still unsure of all the details. I wanted to find Bella, to get her to calm the hell down enough for me to find out what she actually uncovered. I needed to know everything.
Dragging myself out of bed, I showered and shaved before dressing and heading out. It occurred to me that I didn't know which dorm room was Bella's, but that didn't fucking matter. The moment I hit the common room, people were talking at me, their words flying a mile a minute until I held my hands up. "Everyone shut the fuck up." I growled. "And talk to me one at a fucking time."
Jasper smirked. "There's a rumor that Val's office was broken into last night," he said, lounging in his favorite chair. "The guards chased the girl down and shot her."
My heart dropped. What?
"Who?" I asked, trying to keep my voice neutral.
Jasper shrugged. "Some commoner."
My heart skittered in my chest, and I take short breath, trying to pick back up any normal rhythm.
"What happened?"
This time Emmett chimed in, a crystal cut glass full of amber liquid still hanging from his fingertips as he draped himself across the sofa. "Rumors are that she was trying to get intel on the Sixteen, maybe looking for blackmail or something." Emmett paused, looking impressed. "She's got balls, whoever she is. I say if she lives through this, she deserves at least a couple mil for the initiative alone."
"She lived through getting gunned down?" I asked, my brows creasing.
"Yeah, she's in the infirmary," Emmett said, bringing the glass to his lips.
I glanced around the room, seeing that everyone was looking to me, to see what I would do. I sighed and flopped down on another sofa, forcing my body to feign disinterest. "Have fun with your pity project," I said, making Emmett laugh. The room settled around me, people going back to their easy joking as I fought everything in me that wanted to get up and run straight to the infirmary.
I don't know why it mattered, but I needed Bella to be okay. I couldn't be responsible for her death, not like this.
…
It wasn't until near lunchtime that I finally got away from the constant crowd of admirers that surrounded me. Usually, I enjoyed the attention, but now I just wanted everyone to fuck off.
I made my way to the infirmary, which was located on the ground floor in the north wing. I hadn't been there much, not recently anyway. I didn't get sick, and I wasn't someone anyone wanted to pick fights with.
Right inside the doors, there was a small waiting room, and to my shock, Bella was sitting on a wooden chair, her eyes puffy and red.
"You're alive," I said, sounding like a fucking idiot.
Bella looked up at me, her face hardening. "You," she snarled, getting up from her seat. "This is your fucking fault." She pressed a sharp finger to my chest.
"I heard you got shot," I said, now unsure that my information was accurate.
Bella's eyes watered, and it looked like she was trying to fight back a sob. "No," she whispered. "My roommate, Alice, was shot."
I frowned. "Why?"
Bella's eyes snapped up to glare at me. "When we went down there for you," she hissed, and my eyes flew around the room, making sure we were alone. "We separated when we got out, and they gunned her down." Her eyes welled with tears, and I swallowed anxiously as they spilled over her cheeks. I couldn't ever recall watching someone cry before. It made me unbelievably uncomfortable.
"Why was Alice with you in the first place?" I asked, glancing away from her. I couldn't look her in the eye, couldn't watch her tears fall.
"There was no way I was getting down there without her," Bella said, surprising me. "Alice is brilliant. Probably more brilliant than anyone else at this school. She figured out how to get us down there, past every security point. I wouldn't have even been able to get into the office without her."
I swallowed as feelings of annoyance that she'd brought Alice in at all and relief that it was Alice and not Bella with a bullet in her collided in my chest.
"She's in a coma," Bella continued, crossing her arms over her chest. I looked at her, my eyes briefly dipping toward her cleavage before focusing on her face. "You didn't ask, but I figured you might be interested to know what your curiosity led to." Her voice was filled with venom, and I let out a breath.
"People die for less," I said, shaking my head.
Bella reached out and slapped me. It fucking hurt, and I glared down at her, suddenly enraged.
"She's a human being." Bella growled. "She's not a fucking pawn for you to sacrifice. Just because she doesn't come from money doesn't mean she's not important."
"News flash," I snarled back. "Some people are born more important than others. That's not my rule; that's fucking life."
Bella's eyes widened with her shock. "No life is worth whatever the fuck you are trying to do," she said, her voice shaking. I couldn't tell if it was fear or fury, or some twisted combination of both.
"You don't fucking get it," I hissed, pacing away from her. "What I'm trying to do." I stopped and huffed. "I'd destroy a thousand lives and it would all be fucking worth it."
Bella leaned back, her mouth snapping shut, her eyes wet with her tears. "You're a fucking monster."
She turned and stalked out of the infirmary, her words ringing through my ears.
I was a fucking monster, and I was only going to get worse the deeper my parents sunk their claws into me. Soon, I would be nothing more than a toxin at the top of the food chain of the world, poisoning everyone below me.
I left the infirmary, too angry and scared and frustrated to be near anyone. I marched outside into the woods, and once my legs broke out into a run, I couldn't fucking stop. I ran and ran, as if I could outpace the darkness closing in all around me.