Satina hummed a merry time to herself as she skipped over to the hotel. "Singing a song, singing a song, in singing, some song." Wrath had gotten boring since all the lava covered everything during her daddy/daughter fun time. Sure it was fun to swim in, but if nobody was swimming with her, could she really call it a pool?
Thus, to alleviate her eternal enemy, boredom, she decided to use her best friend! She just had to track them down, which was hard at first, but once sinners stopped trying to chop her up in meat shops, she got a location real quick.
And she traveled the best way she knew how, riding on fireworks! Unfortunately, she didn't have the greatest aim, hitting the wall instead of the door, as she crashed through and hit the ground with a roll. "We're under fire! Grab the cannonssssss!" The funny snake man screamed at the delicious looking eggs.
"Yes boss man!"
"Can we get shot out of it?"
"The new generation of sins will bring about the four horsemen!"
"Isn't that the same wall as last time?" The cooky spider asked.
"For fucks sake, how long are people going to keep attacking!" A gray lady aimed a funny looking spear. "Stay away … kid?" The woman blinked.
"Hi there." Satina greeted.
"Hey Satina." Nifty waved as she held a bug on a knife.
"Hey giant cockroach lady!"
"WHERE!?" The one eyed bug shouted as she waved the knife around. "If you're a mommy then your kids are in for a rude awakening!!!"
"Wait, you know her?" Vaggie questioned.
"She showed up one time and played with Iruma cause he had the same type of childishness she had." The cat man spoke up. "He also didn't immediately die when they played together."
"And not dying makes you best friends!" She exclaimed happily.
"If that was the case, Smiles would be a cheer sucker harder than Charlie." The cooky spider snickered.
"I happen to agree with the little gremlin." The weird and bad tasting deer man bowed with funny smile. "Greetings young Satina. I take it you've had a lovely stroll of destruction on your travels over here?"
"Hey radio man. Do you taste better than the last time or do you still taste like misery and depression?" She asked. She was feeling peckish on the ride over here.
"Why does everyone say that? I personally find great pleasure and joy in the suffering of others?" He muttered under his breath. "Shall I grab young Suzuki for a play date then?"
"Nah, I can get him myself since I'm close enough." Satina grinned as she pulled out her fun soul friendship chain. "Come on out, best friend!"
Funny sounds of crunching and smashing were heard as Iruma cried out in joy. "Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" He yelled in delight as he fell right in front of her from the ceiling. "Never getting used to that."
"Hey Iruma." She waved, looking over his new blue self. "Oooh, you're fluffier than before. Did you decide to be a dog? Or a bird? Or a bird dog?!" A bird dog sounded cool.
"Alastor, what have I said about pulling Iruma around like that around the hotel- Satina?" Her favorite cousin blinked as she came down the stairs. "What are you doing here?"
"Hey cousin Charlie!" She waved over to the girl enthusiastically. "You wanna play with Iruma too?"
"You guys are cousins-right, the sin thing." Iruma noted. "Satina's the second demon to own my soul after Alastor."
"Quite a delightful adventure. Helped us learn that if he ever makes any sort of deal with any demon whatsoever, his soul is bound to them." The deer man chuckled. "Ah, the wonderful loopholes of being a human chained in hell."
Charlie blinked weirdly before kneeling down. "Satina, you want to be Iruma's friend right?"
"We're already friends! He doesn't die when we have fun, and we made a contract thingy." She grinned.
"But friends shouldn't own their souls."
Satina blinked. "But daddy said that you need to use contracts because some humans and sinners want to do terrible things you can't trust otherwise and just pretend to be your friend to gain benefits."
"But having friends is all about trusting other people."
"Yeah, and I trust Iruma fully because I have a contract, so we get to be friends!"
"You're not going to get her to give up her contract princess." The kitty rolled his eyes. "Not until she learns nuance, which even by then, is a very slim chance."
"But …"
"It's fine Charlie. I learned to accept my contracts." Iruma smiled. "Anyone that's not Alastor at least."
"But you said so yourself Iruma. You love working for me because I finally gave you all the happiness in Hell that you never had on Earth! And I, will be forever happy to remind you of it every single day!"
"..." The boy simply smiled. "Hey Satina, wanna play a game with me and Alastor?"
The deer man blinked. "Wait what?"
"That sounds fun!" She shouted with a grin. "I've been watching japanese tv for inspiration for some japanese game! Squid Games gave me so many fun ideas!" Her best friend's smile widened.
"That sounds amazing, why don't we play red light green light?"
"Sorry what-"
"Perfect! I brought balloons made from eyeballs!" She cheered as she let them fly through the room. "That way they can watch all your happy faces whenever you look right into the dark abyss of their eyes."
They blinked and stared at the many faces around. "They seem festive." Iruma smiled, petting her head.
"Iruma, what are you planning?" Charlie asked with a shaky grin.
"Here's how it works! If you move when an eyeball looks at you, they blink you out!" Satina clapped.
"... What do you mean by tttthat?" The snake asked nervously.
"Alastor can demonstrate." Iruma smiled.
"Oh no you-" One of the eyeballs stared at the man … as he went pop, black blood spraying everywhere. Everyone stood silent until…
"Bwaaahshahahahaahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!" Kitty fell on his back in laughter. "Even better the second time around! Ahahahahahaha!"
"…. Iruma… I don't know whether to be scared of you or proud." A gray moth lady with a pirate look muttered.
"Can you be both?" Iruma asked.
"Kid can be violent when he wants." The spider nodded.
"Bad boy Iruma!" Nifty clapped. "I wanna do that!"
"We all are!" Satina shouted with a cheer. "Last one out wins! Ready, set go!" The eyeballs began staring at everyone.
"Wait, so we'll go out like Al if we-"
"Red light!" Satina shouted as they fired at the spider, blowing him up just like the deer man. "Isn't this fun?"
"... Is she always …" The gray lady asked slowly, standing still. "This … violent?"
"Her idea of a piggy back ride involves rocket powered feet." Iruma said. "Sorry for dragging everyone else into it."
"It's fine, it can't be helped, Iruma." Charlie patted Iruma on the back.
The snake reveled with a smirk. "Honessssstly, itsssss very much wortttttttth it to sssssssseeee Alasssssssstor get a tasssssssste of hissssss own mediccccccciii-"
"Red light!" The eyeballs fired at the snake next.
"... Maybe we should just stop the conversation until the game is over." The kitty deadpanned.
"Not until I taste the pain! And until Iruma bites me, this is the next best thing I'll take!" Nifty shouted in enthusiasm. "Come on, I can take-!" And she was out next. Such a fun game!
Missi and the rest of the gang listened off as the kid narrated. "Every step was filled with dread, as the ghost got closer and closer with every passing second, the lights beyond her peripheral vision fading one after the other. Flick, Flick, Flick."
"Come on." A crocodile man said with nervousness in his voice. "So close, they're so close …"
"The schoolgirl turned the corner, in the distance seeing … the church. She was close, a few more feet and she'd be in the clear from the ghost. 'I'm safe, I'm safe', she cried out with relief."
Now one might say that for a group of Dinosuars and reptiles to be listening to a Japenese comic with fierce intent might be a bit childish… and whoever the fuck said their could shove their face into a meat grinder; it was their afterlife and they could live it however the fuck they wanted.
In this instance, media that wasn't controlled by another fuckin' overlord, and had genuine artistic feel to it. There wasn't the expected raunchiness or general sense of perversion and tasteless displays of sexuality that people like Vox and Valentino had made mainstream.
"She ran with all her might. Clack clack clack went the heels as they collided with the pavement, every step bringing her closer to salvation. The nightmare would pass, she would be free." And the kid, one of her recent soul deals, actually happened to be a pretty decent narrator. Sure they were connected to the radio demon and broadcasted every single word, but unlike the Vs, her status as an overlord wasn't dependent on clout and trend chasing, so she didn't have to give a fuck about what other people had to say about it.
"Hah, dumb bitch. Those heels are going to be the death of her, I'm calling it now." A croc Klub member chuckled as he held his tail with anticipation.
"Our next bottle says it's gonna be the darkness that kills her." A newt took on that action, a grin on her face.
"I still say possession." An iguana pointed out with a sharp toothed smile. "Her soul ripped out of her body as she's forced to watch it move around like a meat puppet for the rest of eternity."
"You guys like your dark endings, don't you?" The kid asked.
"Who the fuck said you could stop!?" A newbie asked with a knife aimed at the human, who just looked content with said fact, unworried.
"Hey, hey, hey, put a hole in the kid, and then we lose story time together, and we compensate by ripping you apart and using your organs as punching bags." Missi laid down the law as she snatched the weapon with her tail.
"Sorry Missi." They lowered their head sheepishly.
"Sorry 'bout that runt, new guy, unruly, you know how it is." Missi waved off.
"Don't worry about it, I've been scared by WAY worse in hell, a knife to the face doesn't really scare me like it used to." He muttered. "… Should I take that as a good thing or bad thing?"
"It's a sign that you've nailed the basics for living in hell." Missi snickered. "And with your fluffy look you have going, you essentially just like anybody else."
"Living in hell basics …" The kid smiled, going back to the book. "Thirty feet. Twenty five feet. Twenty feet. Every step to the holy ground was another step for salvation."
"Pffft, salvation, what a joke!" A dragon girl cackled. "Like such a concept actually exists!"
"If ya put your trust in something holy that isn't a bullet, then you might as well be dead." A giant turtle dude nodded.
"Unfortunately for the young victim … her shoe was caught in a hole … the lights around her fading into darkness. She tried to free herself … but by then it was too late, as the ghost grabbed her neck." The human shook his head. "'Another face to add to my collection' it spoke, as the world became dark."
"YEEEEAAAAHHH!!" Everyone knows the monster is the real hero in the end.
"Face stealer, totally should have seen the signs with that mask shop!" The newt snapped her fingers.
"I called it, the heels nailed her to the ground, I so fucking called it!" The croc dude cheered.
"Yeah yeah, I'll pay for your next round."
Missi grinned. "Alright kiddo, here you go." She tossed over a juice box to the brat.
"Yay." He cheered as his body somehow became more fluffy as he sipped it.
"You'd think becoming heir to Beelzebub would actually give you more mature taste." One of the raptor demons asked.
"Well I can take sloth drugs en masse without dying, so I think it counts for something." He shrugged. "And I never really had much of a taste for alcohol to begin with. Husk was my first introduction to any at all. Besides, Bee eats mountains of cotton candy, so 'mature taste' is kind of subjective when you don't really care what anyone thinks."
"True that." Missi chuckled. "That's why I started this little gang, to do whatever we want however we want, and fuck over anyone who tries to get in the way of our fun."
"Is it really that simple to do whatever you want?" The kid asked.
"Fuck yeah it is, you know, if ya got the backbone for it." She grinned. "Hell runs on fear, not respect. As long as you can beat up and toss away anyone who argues with you, you can do what you like. That's how the overlords function for the most part, and why no one listens to that princess chick."
"Ah..." the kid nodded. "Then why are the Vs so powerful if no one likes them?"
"They're a bit of an exception to the rule, and we all call it asinine." Missi rolled her eyes. "Valentino went for the desperate, Vox lured people in with TV; and Velvette made contracts by introducing social media. You don't have to like them, you just have to like what they bring to the table."
"... But what they bring is pointless and useless." His creepy shadow's smile brightened.
Missi snorted. "That it is, Suzuki, that it is."
Octavia felt her fingers intertwine with every inch of fur on her boyfriend's head. "It's so soft… it's like it gets softer every time I pet it." She practically felt mesmerized to keep doing it over and over again.
"Everyone keeps saying that." He muttered. "It's like everyone nice in hell has these really soft hands. And I'm still trying to get a hang of what this thing can and can't do." He looked at the mouths on his arms. "You sure it doesn't bother you?"
Oh it doesn't bother us as all you sexy, little dog. You want to sink those teeth into us, do you, so you-shut up! "They don't bother me in the slightest." Octavia grinned as she held Iruma's hand as they walked through the street. "If it's a part of you, then it can't be anything less than good."
"Heh.. good.." The boy sighed. "Everyone at the hotel doesn't hold it against me.. everyone except Angel Dust. I get the feeling he doesn't like me all that much."
"Well Angel Dust can bite it if he doesn't see how adorable and precious you are." She leaned down and rubbed her cheek against his face. "You know I would've been there in a heartbeat ... But ... something came up with dad."
"Oh, was it more fighting with your mom?"
"A little bit." That entire event was way too emotional to give out details to … and recontextualizes everything Octavia knew about her father. "On better news, they're finally divorcing officially."
"Oooh, congratulations." He smiled. "If you want I could ask Charlie to help you in the custody battle. I'd rather you not live with a woman trying to kill you."
"Heh." She thought it was cute he assumed it was her life at risk…. This was one of those times where it was better to just not say anything. "Thanks, but I'm almost eighteen. Pretty soon I'll have to get my own place to live."
"Wow, eighteen. Young Adulthood." Iruma blinked. "I could help with taxes if you ever need it."
"... Let me take a guess, you did them for your parents?" She asked.
"Every year, last minute, barely avoided the IRS… although now in retrospect, if my parents didn't say please, I would've just had them get arrested."
"Iruma, it'll be fine." She rubbed his head. "I can do my own taxes, they can't be that hard."
"... Oh you sweet, innocent soul."
"Iruma, you don't realize the levels of irony it takes for you to say that." Octavia snickered.
"But I love you. I don't want you to take on something that dangerous alone."
"Pfft, seriously Iruma, this is too adorable-" She paused, her face becoming red. "…. What did you just say?"
"I said I don't want you to take on something that dangerous alone." He answered.
"Before…before that.."
"... Oh, you sweet, innocent soul?"
"In the middle of that." Did … she mishear…
"... I love you?" He asked.
"…" if her own feathers weren't in the way, she was sure her entire body would be going red. "You… love me…"
"Well yeah, you've said it to me during the extermination." Iruma continued, nodding. "You care for my safety and happiness while constantly helping me. And we've been dating for a while… and..." He held her hands. "… I… I.. I never thought I could taste love in any form before... but you…. With you... I know what it feels like… I love you Octavia, and...I always will."
Poof
… Two wings sprouted from his back … enveloping her entire body in a hug. "Huh… that's new." Iruma looked at his beautiful wings, slightly surprised. "Should we-?"
"Kiss me you adorable little bluebird." She chuckled as she pressed her lips against his mouth... his soft and succulent mouth she just wanted to enter and get licked all over with tongue as he eats out of you-shut up!!
"Kissing always feels nice." Iruma smiled as they finally came back for some air.
"It does … " How was it that one soul could make her feel... so alive… and nurtured. She was definitely the luckiest demon in all of hell-
"Oh Iruma…." Said a sucky sweet and unnerving voice ... coming from a sinner … or was it a hellhound, hard to tell, started approaching. Her smile and eyes looked unhinged. "I know it's been a while, and we look different… but don't you remember me?"
"... Start running." He said quietly, eyes pricked as his wings retracted.
"Hold on Iruma, I got this." Octavia glared as she stood in front of her clearly uncomfortable boyfriend. "Who are you?" She crossed her arms.
"I'm Meg, Iruma's soulmate." The sinner answered, baring her canine teeth aggressively. "What about you, bitch?"
"Octavia Goetia, Iruma's girlfriend." She growled, making her feathers flare up. "And last I checked, you were the human girl he tried to help, and you repaid him by nearly raping him."
"It's not rape if he said yes." The sinner called Meg shot back, not scared at all as she walked into Octavia's face. "So back off, before I make you."
"Oh, you want to make me… go ahead bitch... take the first shot."
"Octavia-"
"It'll be fine Iruma-Kun… the little cunt doesn't have the guts."
Bang
And what was how Octavia found a frying pan slammed into her skull. "... Seriously?" She asked, more annoyed if anything. "You've been in hell for how long and you thought that would work?"
Crack
A knife broke in half the moment it hit her skin. "Pfff, I know baby imps that stab harder than that. Guess this means going to hell didn't improve your shitty life, such a waste."
The mutt cunt snarled. "Says the bitch who looks like she has no friends, a mom that doesn't love her, and a dad that's more focused on his boy toy than his daughter."
"... Well, that's the closest thing you've done to damage since you've got here, so congrats." Octavia growled. "Now let me give you what I like to call the Valentino experience."
SMACK
And that's how the top half of the bitch was sent flying all across hell, the lower half falling to the ground. "Oh boy, free meat!" A cannibal couple passed by as they picked it up. "Hey Iruma! Enjoying your date?"
Her boyfriend waved at them. "Hey Mr. and Ms. Clarke! Yes, it's quite lovely, thanks for asking."
"You're quite welcome." The female cannibal bowed with a curtsy. "You have quite the keeper, Ms. Goetia. Toodles." She and her man leave with the remains of the mutt cunt in their hold.
Octavia blinked as she found herself calming down, turning back to Iruma. "You alright?"
"Yes, I am. Thank you Via-chan." He smiled at her. "I somehow forget how strong you are … it's amazing you can use it to protect others."
"Only what's worth protecting." She grinned, pulling Iruma close. "Now come on, I read about a place that advertises an all you can eat buffet."
"Awesome!" He cheered with sparkly eyes. "You're the best!"
"Only because you make me feel my best." Her heart felt warm... and it would only feel warmer after she saw him eat and look so happy and satisfied..
And then you can see those teeth in action! Yes, yes you want that, for him to bite us down hard! Come on you little bluebird, bite me, bite me with those teeth and dig deep into my neck and make me orgasm a volano-SHUT THE FUCK UP! Seriously, was this puberty, or was dad to blame somehow?
Carmilla gazed at the latest creation. "An angelic bomb." She noted.
"Yep." Clara smiled. "I got inspired after hearing about what happened with Iruma and Cherri Bomb. Only I replaced the LSD with angelic shrapnel."
"Wait, is that why I've tasted cherries in the back of my mouth lately?" The boy asked. "Could have sworn that was just the ice cream."
"Do your extra mouths work the same as your normal one?" Odette asked as she looked over the boy's arm.
"I have no idea. They just do whatever they want most of the time. I only just got them to stop eating people." He grumbled.
"But they were still restrained by angelic rope?" Carmilla questioned.
"That's what Charlie and Vaggie said, but then the sword popped out, and morphed around the gauntlet to become a claw."
"… You know if you weren't likely to die upon dissection and cause your soul to vanish anyway, everyone in hell would be cutting you open to see what makes you tick right?" Odette deadpanned.
"Not any different than how I used to live in all honesty." He shrugged. "Only difference it's people instead of animals… for the most part, I still need to figure out how to fight the rabid weasel."
"Could have sworn the three arms and extra sharp teeth would have done the thing in." Clara deadpanned.
"That's what I thought… it's relentless." The boy shuddered. "That and my body shifts randomly, I can't call upon transformations at will." Carmilla would still keep him a good distance away from her daughters … just in case. Not that the boy had violent intent and they weren't capable... but she was as cautious as she was powerful.
"Anyways, back on topic." Clara picks up one of the bombs. "There's enough firepower to turn a demon into complete swiss cheese at close range, and enough backlash to spread it over thirty feet if you're going for a wide barrage or mob. And thanks to how small the bits of angelic shrapnel are, most of the cost producing it comes from the gunpowder."
"Would you be able to use any leftover dust like a gas weapon?" The boy asked. "If demons can't touch it normally, it being inside their body would be really bad I imagine."
"We already thought of it, but at that low of a concentration it would lose it's effectiveness." Odette said. "Like how the blessed weaving we put in our suits doesn't burn us."
"Ahh, I was wondering how that worked." The boy nodded. "What about the high heels though? They look like pure steel."
"I believe you're accustomed to living with pain." Carmilla explained. "They don't pierce the skin but they burn the flesh. By this point I've become numb to it, which helps in combat scenarios when they arrive."
That made the boy blink. "So... you hurt yourself to get stronger?"
"Everything always has a price in the end." To get smarter one must put in time studying, to get stronger one has to put in the effort of exercising. "It's all a matter of how much you're willing to pay for it."
"… And… it's worth it?"
"That is an answer that varies depending on the person." Carmilla nodded as she looked to her girls. "For countless decades, I've fought to keep what I love and value safe. And as that's succeeded until this day, I view it with worth." Even if she was stuck in burning high heels for eternity.
"I see… if you love something, then it's worth fighting for it." The boy smiled.
"Aptly put, Young Suzuki." Even if it sounded cheesy, it really was as simple as that.
Alastor hummed to himself as he walked inside the parlor. "Busy as always, aren't we Rosie?" He chuckled to himself.
"Alastor, nice to see you again." The woman gave off her delightful little grin. "Ooh, tell me you got some juicy gossip on some new souls. That cannibal family IMP sent down here was a delight. Well, at least the dad and kids. The mom was a bit …"
"Religiously deranged in the headspace?"
"Honestly it's confusing if she worshipped Satan or wanted to kill him, so very confusing. Religion, only gets you so far in life to put faith in something you're only 10 percent sure of." The cannibal overlord cackled. "We had to hold dear old Martha down for the first two weeks to get over the denial part of adjustment, then she went in and out of eating and sleeping with all the single cannibal bachelors in town."
"Sounds absolutely rough." He shook his head. Some people just had no self restraint. "I've got word on a small bar looking for overlords to enter the umbrella under. We can talk over tea. Oh Suzuki."
"On it." The boy in question carried a small cart with him, carrying a steaming hot, boiling tea pot over his head. "Don't spill … don't spill …"
"Alastor, did you bring the bluebird all the way to cannibal town just to treat him like a butler?" Rosie raised a brow with a slight disapproving tone.
"I needed to find a new creative way to have fun with him, and what better way than to serve the people of this town as needed." He smiled.
"To be fair, I kind of asked for this when I blew him up with Satina's balloon." The boy nodded. "Still totally worth it."
"Ah yes, your little payday with the young wrathian one… I shall not forget." In all honesty, he was only half raging with complete anger and need to devour his soul. He was also partially impressed just how intentionally brutal the boy had gotten with that little trick. He was becoming a bit more ruthless … how fun. Of course it still came at Alastor's expense, so he wouldn't let the boy think he was going to get softer on him in any case.
"Oh, I recalled that on your broadcast, that Satina is quite the little scamp." Rosie chuckled. "From Satan's daughter to Beelzebub's heir, you're aiming to fly high, little Bluebird. Not bad for someone that's only been living in hell for about four months."
"I don't see a difference in royalty and normality other than just being absurdly stronger than other people." Young Suzuki shrugged. "So where should I put this set down?"
"Right on the table darling, and take a load off, I insist." Rosie gestured.
"I mean, not sure if Alastor would let me-"
"Now now now, little blue bird, as long as you're in Cannibal town, you don't have to do a lick for anybody." Rosie sent that delightfully mischievous smirk to him. "Professional courtesy prevents Alastor from doing otherwise."
"Only for you, old friend. Anybody else and I'd send the boy into the alley of innumerable used needles."
The boy blinked. "… What do you see in each other?"
"We have the same taste in style." Alastor cackled.
"That and when he was on his Overlord serial killing streak, he waltzed into Cannibal Town one day. I offered him a pot of tea and a nice bicep to chow on and we've been closer than two peas in a pod since." Rosie giggled.
"If I ever have any standards, let it be to never ruin a good meal."
"At least we have that in common if nothing else." The boy rolled his eyes as he took a seat and poured the tea.
"So how's that new suit been treating you bluebird? Gotta say I never got a compounded request for a lopsided body and clothes that have blessed weaving. I swear, if Carmine wasn't taken, I'd be tempted to take a bite out of the gal." She chuckled.
"It actually fits rather nice. There's a lot of breathing room inside of it so I'm not cooking like an egg on the sidewalk with all this fur." The boy nodded with a smile.
"You ain't the first hairy client I've had and you sure as cider on an autumn evening you won't be the last." Rosie smiled. "Though if you ever want something special for your starry eyed owlette, just let me know."
"Yeah, I'll recommend you to her if she ever needs new clothes." The boy smiled.
The female overlord chuckled. "I meant clothes for you to wear for her."
Suzuki blinked. "Like I told Alastor once, clothes are just clothes. Doesn't make a difference if it's a dress or rags, she'd still look pretty." If Alastor hadn't lost that gamble, arms would be ripped apart.
"Ah, to be young and foolish." Rosie took it in stride. A very well mannered and composed woman she was. "You remind me of a young me when I dated my first husband. He was quite the charmer, even if he was clueless with every other word."
"First? Oh; did you two divorce?"
"Not legally, but it's a little hard to do that when you're busy hiding his skeleton from the cops." She laughed.
"Ah, so it's like Octavia's parents, except you actually liked each other at first." The boy nodded "... Wait, does that make you a Stella that wants to murder your daughter?"
"One, never had one. Infertile as a human, and infertile as a sinner." She shrugged. "And two … I have devoured the consciousnesses of those who commit such acts." The world became more bloody as flesh around her seemed to twitch and twist. "… But it was never that serious, darling. Just had a few disagreements. We eventually patched things up amicably when I finally came to hell, isn't that right Franklin?" She waved to a half eaten corpse on the wall. "Hahahah, oh still bringing life to the walls."
"Definitely one of the top three things to visit within this lovely little town you have, Rosie." Alastor agreed, taking a sip of tea.
"... I'm just going to chalk it up to cultural and artistic differences and keep drinking." Iruma responded with a slight eye twitch, before taking his own sip of the beverage. "Man, this tea is great."
"Made with the finest of bloods." He grinned as the boy paused. "What, did you think it was just the meat we could devour from the human body? My boy, you need to learn to be more creative than that."
"…. If I just keep drinking and ignore what you just said I won't throw up." Haha, they were breaking bit by bit.
"Hey Mr. doggie!" One of the cannibal children waved their hands at the boy. "Can my friends and I bite your flesh please. We want to see if we get hairballs."
"My my, what well mannered children that live here. Iruma, it would be quite rude of you to deny them such an innocent and polite request." He smirked.
"Given all the fur, the most I'm scared of at the moment is the kids ingesting fleas." The boy grumbled as he stood up.
"Bluebird's grown quite a backbone lately, hasn't he?" Rosie chuckled. "Kid's losing his fear of ya, Al."
"Hands are tied. Children, can't quite discipline them like we used to." He sighed. "What happened to the good old American value of a father whipping their son?"
"What happened is maniacs like you were born and got sent down here." Rosie chuckled.
"Touché old friend, touché."
Beez watched as the kid looked at his hand in confusion. "A cannibal bit off my finger … it grew back in a matter of seconds, and their hunger was completely satiated …" The pup waved their hand in the air. "I don't know what freaks me out more, the fact I felt no pain from it, the fact it healed instantly, or the fact I somehow felt… good giving up my finger?"
"I think the weirdest part was that you made them full." Bee admitted. "I prefer giving them just enough to feel like they're eating so they can keep indulging in their delights." More and more, endless feeding … true gluttony. "As for everything else, well, that's because you're gluttony, or a gluttony seed." She picked the kid up as she grew in size, placing him in the palm of her hand as she laid on her side. "You picked up what I said about your body reflecting your soul, right?"
"Yeah, kind of." The pup nodded. "Dog because I bite things and obey, bird because of love and Octavia, and termite because I eat."
"Welp, gluttony is all about indulgence. Abilities that pop up revolve around that. The things that you normally would only do in moderation taken to their extreme and experienced beyond." She stated. "So, what would you like to indulge in, if you didn't have to worry about tomorrow, or living, or anything?"
The boy looked up for a moment. "Well … being full, being comfortable, and talking with someone I care about." He sat on her hand and crossed his legs as he took on a more thoughtful expression. "To ... forever feel warm and loved with as many people as I can surround myself with, and gather around an endless buffet you never have to think about paying for, relaxing as struggling to survive and letting thoughts no longer fill everything in your head … it's a dream, isn't it?"
"Pffft, look here my little bitch boy, you see these hounds partying and getting fucked out of their minds here?" She waved to her party.
"If you mean the parts about playing with each other and eating everything in sight, yes." The pup nodded.
"Well for every hound here, just one of my parties can be considered a dream come true for them, and nobody is falling asleep to make it happen." Bee chuckled. "For us Sins, there is no dreaming, it's simply what you chose to bring to the table and make happen. I want to indulge everyone with an endless party of booze, drugs, and cotton candy, and because I want it, it happens." She poofed up a pile of cotton candy into his hands. "That is my vision of gluttony."
"You want people to be happy and eat … once again, you are the best sin." He grinned, chomping it down in an instant. "It's way more delicious than Earth's cotton candies… but it could still be a little more filling, guess that's just my preference."
"Hey, if you didn't do you, I wouldn't have chosen you to begin with." She nuzzled his head as she set him down. "Fact, why don't we get you started on that right now? Today, you're going to make the kind of food that you like, the kind you love to indulge in and want everyone else to indulge in with."
The pup blinked. "Food that I like?"
"I spread cotton candy cause it's my fave, but you got your faves, and you got to have a signature." She waved her hands and made her sweet honey flow through the air. "My honey, or what the rest of hell calls, Beelzejuice, is like, my essence in drink form. When you drink this, you think of me, in tastes, in feeling, in those good vibes."
"I … don't know." The kid admitted. "I kind of ate in the woods for so long and used a lot of discount priced meals. I'm not entirely sure if I HAVE a favorite food … plus, Alastor says I'm never allowed in the kitchen again."
"That deer fucker?" Beez smirked. Honestly she had no idea why anyone would be afraid of that bastard. "He ain't here, is he? You got the whole world of the kitchen at your fingertips." She snapped her fingers, making the kid an entire kitchen filled with ingredients. "The world's a stage."
"So… whatever I want to eat? No limit?"
"No limit. Bake, smoke, grill, boil, whatever you want you create however you want it." She popped up a cookbook. "Till ya get the magic down, use this as a guide, and don't be afraid to freestyle."
The pup slowly picked up the book, flipping through the pages. "… I think I'll start with a … cake. Looks simple enough."
"Good, then get to work." She smirked, gently patting him on the back with a finger.
"Okay …" He looked at the recipe. "One pound of flour …" He grabbed the bag, opening it up and dumping the whole thing in the pot. "A cup of milk …" He grabbed an empty drinking glass, filling it up to the brim, before putting it in.
"Ooh, I love where this is going." Bee chuckled. "He has no concept of precision."
"Two eggs …" He looked into the fridge, taking out two whole cartons of eggs and dumping the contents inside, shells and all. "Can't waste a single crumb or yoke."
"Hey Beez, whatcha…" Tex came over and took a glance at the little show the pup was performing. "Ah... you're actually serious about the successor thing, aren't you?"
"What, you thought I would half ass it when I said he was gonna take my throne?" She asked with a teasing smirk. "Vortex, I do nothing in halves."
Her boyfriend shrugged. "I know, just, never expected you to try to pass the party baton to someone else."
"Eh, what can I say, that kid has a bottomless stomach and I decided to take a chance." Bee smirked. "Come on, tell me he doesn't have that dog in him."
They turned to the boy mixing together some rainbow looking batter around in a pot. "Hm... more sugar, it should have more sugar." And he got a whole bag of it and plopped it on top, covering half the counter. "… Maybe a little more."
"Beez, I know you like excess…. But isn't this too much… everything?" Tex asked with his scarred eyebrow raised.
"Babe, there's never too much of anything in gluttony." She smiled. "Let the pup do his thing. You don't make Da Vincis or whatever by not making a mess first."
"Now, bake for four hundred for thirty minutes." He muttered as he poured the multicolored sludge into a pan. "Hm, do I want to cook it faster? Make it hotter and cook it faster, just like all the stews in the woods." He cranked up the dial to twelve thousand. "There, now it should only take one minute." He grinned as the oven began glowing red beyond belief, flames licking the sides.
Tex's eyes widened. "Bee, pretty sure he just turned the oven into a bomb!"
"Then it'll be one kickass firework show!" Bee cackled. This was fucking beautiful to witness.
"Wait, bomb?" The kid asked, before his foot morphed, launching him far far away from the oven.
Boom
As it exploded, a rainbow aura of sparks and fire flew everywhere as molten sugar was flung all over. "Ooh, flaming rock candy!" A hound shouted as it flew into his mouth, then he screamed. "Ahhhh! It burns! It's delicious but it burns!"
"Bee, just… what the heck?" Tex peeked out from behind her.
"Here you go…. I think it's cake?" The pup presented a purple…. She didn't know how to describe it other than screaming abomination, the ghastly-looking dessert staring at her and Tex right into their very being.
"EAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"... I think he succeeded in doing one thing you can't." Tex said in mild horror. "He made life."
"...PPAAAHHHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAAAHAAAAA!" Bee cackled. "You're awesome pup, you know that!?" Seriously, this was just … "Hahahaha!"
"So … I did good?" He asked hopefully.
"Oh no, you failed spectacularly, I wouldn't let this shit near my club for a thousand lifetimes." Food shouldn't be wasted, but biohazards weren't exactly edible.
"Oh." The kid pouted.
"But you tried and failed, that's life. And what do you do when something fails?" Bee asked with a smirk.
"... Try something else?" He asked in confusion.
"Exactly! Or you try again and fail in a whole new way! Don't be afraid to fail, failure is the key to success!"
"It is?" He asked. "I thought it was determination."
"Nope, sometimes rock bottom's the best place to be. I mean, I'm in hell, bottom of bottoms, and I have the time of my life all the time. Because that's the thing about hope and despair. They may both be useless … but once you're at the bottom it's pointless. Cause you can only go up."
He stared at her for a moment. "So… I'm a failure… and I'm proud."
"Yep."
"I'm a failure and I'm proud!
"You tell the world!"
"I'm a failure and I'm proud!" He shouted to his own shadow. "I'M A FAILURE AND I'M PROUD! I'M A FAILURE AND I'M PROUD!"
"Fuck yeah you are!" She screamed. "Now what are you going to do now?!"
"I'm going to cook deer meat and I'm going to fail again!" The kid's shadow seemed to twitch at that.
"Cook as much as you like pup! Until the fire department shuts us down!"
"Bee, seriously, maybe some restraint is required…"
"Fuck restraint! Let the pup cook till he drops!"