{ 45 }
The lecture hall on the third floor is eerily silent. Hermione and I are sitting side by side. Her fingers are intertwined with my own.
McGonagall and Bones are standing in front of the map, silently examining the markings.
After several long minutes, Hermione cleared her throat.
"The best way to exit campus is going to be through the gate near Hagrid's hut." She moved to stand in front of the map. "I suggest making a path here. You could line it with Christmas lights to make it fun for the younger students."
And to keep anyone from straying too close to where we know the energy flares to be.
"This is quite impressive." Professor Bones remarked. "I cannot believe the progress you have made in such a short amount of time."
"I can't take all the credit." Hermione lifted her shoulder before crossing her arms over her chest. "We have had help from our friends. It was actually Luna that found the pattern."
McGonagall pinched her lips together to suppress a smile.
"I should have known," she muttered under her breath. Then she released a short laugh and spoke in a normal tone. "We will have the elves get started on that path. Excellent work, both of you."
She turned and looked pointedly at me for a moment.
A small sense of pride welled within my chest.
"Indeed." Professor Bones was still studying the map. Reluctantly, she turned and appraised Hermione first, and then myself. "Have you been able to figure out why the wards are failing?"
"Not yet." Hermione rolled her eyes. "We thought we might focus on getting students on and off the grounds safely first."
I ducked my head to hide my smirk. She is not quite as angry as she was yesterday. Her Irritation is still there, though, bubbling just under the surface. Especially with the former Auror, it would seem. The only reason she is talking to Bones at all is because we needed to give them an update on the wards, and we are running out of time. Christmas break will begin in two days.
Bones released a deep sigh.
McGonagall pinched her lips together in obvious disapproval of Hermione's attitude. She did not voice that displeasure, though. Perhaps she is being lenient given the week we have had.
Bones opened her mouth as though to say something.
"If that's all?" Hermione asked quickly. "We do have exams to prepare for."
McGonagall took the hint, bid her farewell, and left. Bones remained, though.
"I do have something I need to discuss with both of you, actually." She sighed as she sat at the table across from me. "It is not pleasant, but needs to be discussed nonetheless."
She motioned for Hermione to sit beside me and waited until, reluctantly, she did just that.
"Minister Shacklebolt has received word that both of you would be willing to testify against Lucius Malfoy." She folded her hands in front of her on the table and took a deep breath. "Neither one of you needs to do that. I strongly urge you to reconsider."
I raised my brow. Did she really think she would talk either one of us out of it? We have already weighed the pros and cons.
"I don't recall asking for your opinion on the matter, Professor." Hermione tapped her fingernails against the tabletop. "We have already made up our minds."
Bones pursed her lips together.
"In that case, I plan to accompany you to the hearing."
"Of course," I responded. I already assumed she would. At the same time, Hermione shook her head and stated, "No."
She turned to glare at me.
"We are going to need as much support as we can get." I am not especially happy with the former Auror either. Still, I believe she is on our side. And so does Hermione, whether she wants to admit it or not.
She inhaled deeply, released the air quickly and rolled her eyes. "Fine."
"Fine." My lip tilted up on the end in a smirk.
Bones looked back and forth from me to her and back again.
"Fine," she responded after a moment. "They have scheduled the hearing for Wednesday afternoon. We will leave in the morning along with the rest of the students."
My heart may have stopped beating for a moment. I was not expecting it to be so soon. I hoped to be through the holidays.
Hermione gripped my hand so tight that my fingertips started to tingle.
"That is really fast, right?" Her eyes darted from me to Professor Bones and back. Her face was pale as a ghost.
Damn it.
"You don't have to do this." I leaned closer to her and spoke softly. I am sure the professor could still hear me.
"Yes, I do." Her eyes hardened and she rolled her shoulders back.
Fucking Gryffindors.
I shook my head and released a deep sigh.
"I know you blame me for what happened, Hermione. I understand. Truly, I do." Bones sat forward, leaning closer to the witch by my side. "Please know, I am on your side. I am still a member of your support group. I will be there for you."
Hermione stared at her for a long moment. She drew her bottom lip between her teeth and contemplated the elder witch.
"It wasn't your fault." She said finally. "If anything, I should have kept my mouth shut instead of challenging the Wizengamot."
I lifted one brow at the same time Bones huffed out a laugh. She had forgotten to tell me that part, apparently.
"Yes, well, I never should have taken you in that courtroom to begin with."
Obviously.
She certainly won't get any argument from either one of us.
[ - - - ]
For the first time in months, Hermione joined me in Arithmancy class.
Despite missing classes for nearly twelve weeks, she was still the first person finished. I tried to ignore her as she left the classroom and focused on my own paper.
Arithmancy is still not my strongest subject. I can get through, but it takes me much longer than it does for her. And that is perfectly alright. I took my time and double checked my work. The extra study sessions we had over the last few weeks helped. I felt confident I had passed when I turned in my parchment.
Hermione was in the hallway waiting for me. Theo was standing beside her near the window.
"Alright there mate?" He asked as I walked up to them.
Hermione had her arms over her chest and her fingernails were digging into her forearm. Her eyes met mine and she smiled as she stepped forward. She relaxed the grip she had on her own arm and slid her hand into mine.
"I thought it was much too easy." She said with a lilt of laughter in her voice.
"Right. You would." I rolled my eyes and tugged her against my side. I want to ask what they were talking about. But I don't.
Our next exam would be Herbology. A break for lunch, then Ancient Runes and Defense Against the Dark Arts.
Each exam went much the same way. Hermione finished before anyone else. She waited outside until I finished as well. Then we went on to the next.
By the end of the day, I was mentally exhausted. Hermione, on the other hand, seemed to be more energized than I had seen her in days. She finished her DADA exam early. Rather than leave the classroom, she engaged Bones in a conversation.
I completed my exam and turned it in, then I waited as the remaining students turned their exams in as well. Hermione continued speaking with Bones.
They are discussing the plan for clearing out the school on Wednesday. I don't want to interrupt. At the same time, I just want to go take a nap.
I slid my coin out of my pocket and tapped it with my wand.
"Are you ready?"
She didn't even look at it. She just turned her head slightly and held her finger in the air.
One minute. Yeah, I know how that goes. One minute will turn into five minutes. Or ten minutes.
I'm bloody exhausted.
"I am going to lie down."
This time she did look to see the message. She turned towards me and seemed to notice the classroom had emptied out. Only the three of us remained.
"Go on," she said with a smile. "Take a nap. You look exhausted."
I hate to say it, but she did not have to tell me twice.
[ - - - ]
"Draco?"
A hand on my shoulder, coupled with a man's voice stating my name, woke me from a dead sleep. I released a gasp as my eyes opened. In a heartbeat, my wand was in my hand and pointed at a startled Theodore Nott.
I blinked my eyes quickly. Still half asleep, I couldn't reconcile why Theo would be in our bedroom.
It took longer than it should have to notice that the curtains around the bed are green. There is no charmed window on the wall across from the bed.
I am not in the rooms Ravenclaw built for Hermione and myself. I am in my dorm, in the Slytherin dungeon.
I lowered my wand and inhaled deeply.
"Don't ever do that again." I growled through gritted teeth. He is damn lucky I didn't hex first and ask questions later.
"Sorry mate." He lowered his hands and took a step back. "It's time for dinner."
I glanced at the clock. I had been asleep for nearly two hours.
"Thanks." I sat on the edge of the bed and scrubbed my hand across my face. I haven't had a nap on my own in months. I'm surprised I was able to sleep at all.
My eyes darted around the room. It's just the two of us. Greg and Blaise are not here.
"You were talking in your sleep."
Internally, I cringed. That cannot be anything good.
I forgot to cast silencing charms. It was to be a quick nap. No one else was here.
Why the fuck didn't I go upstairs?
"And?" I looked at him warily. I don't remember what I was dreaming about.
He stared at me for a long moment.
"Granger has you studying too hard." He grinned. "You were talking about that stupid tale we translated in runes. The Phoenix and the Snake."
He laughed.
I released a sigh of relief.
"The Serpent and the Phoenix." I corrected him as I stood. "It's the story of my fucking life."
I muttered the last bit under my breath.
Theo snorted a laugh.
"I suppose you would be the Serpent in that story? Slithering in to save the fallen Phoenix…" He stopped short halfway to the door.
Fucking Hell.
Theo is too smart for his own good.
He turned slowly. His eyes locked on mine.
"That might actually make sense." His brow furrowed as he studied me.
Now I have a choice to make. Tell him the truth of it. Or not.
"It was a metaphor." I rolled my eyes and shouldered past him to the door.
"A damn good one, too." He huffed.
Part of me wants to tell him. He has been by my side through the thick of it. Still, this is one secret that we need to keep hold of for as long as possible. Even from our best friends.
I bit my tongue. This is not the time to divulge such information.
I stopped with my hand on the door latch. My back is still to him, but I can feel his eyes boring into me.
"Let's get dinner, yeah?" I released a deep sigh and pulled the door open.
[ - - - ]
"Where are you?"
My lip tilted up on one side as I read the message. I sent a quick reply as I left the dungeon and climbed the stairs to the third floor.
"On my way upstairs."
I turned the corner, and walked straight into a chest shaped wall. The coin in my hand clattered to the floor.
"Get out of my way, Malfoy." Greg growled.
"Damn, Goyle." I stepped back and lifted both hands in the air. "Watch where you are walking, will you?"
He looked down at me.
"You walked into me." His nose curled up on the end and he snarled at me.
He isn't wrong. I rolled my eyes and stepped around him. The coin had rolled towards the Grand Staircase. I walked over and bent down to pick it up.
"What is that? Payment for your mudblood whore?"
My blood ran cold right before anger surged through me. I tamped it down and curled my hand into a tight fist around the coin.
"That is rich, coming from you." I drawled in a bored tone as I slowly turned towards him. "Or do you actually think that Tracey loves you and the two of you are soulmates?"
I crossed my arms over my chest and glared at him.
"What are you on about?" His mouth pinched together.
I stared at him for a long moment. My eyes darted to Theo. He is standing against the wall with his arms over his chest. He raised one brow and smirked at me.
"You are paying her for services rendered with your family vault. You have to know that." Theo huffed a short laugh.
Greg's brow creased as he curled his nose and scrunched his eyes. You would think he was working out an arithmancy problem in his head.
Merlin and Salazar.
My stomach dropped.
I could tell the exact moment he understood. Anger flashed through his eyes.
"You don't even have a family vault anymore." He spat. "And you have a mudblood keeping your bed warm at night."
He is trying to get a reaction from me. I curled my lip in distaste, looked down my nose at him. Even though he easily towers over me.
"Times are changing, Gregory." I spoke in my most condescending tone. "That word doesn't mean anything anymore."
He took a step closer and drew his wand. I held my ground. I am not going to prison over Gregory Goyle.
"Careful, Mate." I spoke in a quieter tone. Time to diffuse this situation if I can. "Is this worth a trip to Azkaban?"
He growled low in his throat.
"You still think you are better than me. You are nothing but a blood traitor, Draco." His hand tightened around his wand. "Mark my words. You will get what's coming to you soon enough. You and your mudblood."
His lip pulled up in a sneer. He glared at me for another moment, then turned and disappeared down the stairwell to the dungeons.
Well then.
I ran my hand through my hair.
"What did he mean by that, do you suppose?" Theo pushed off from the wall.
"Your guess is as good as mine." It was a threat, obviously. He spoke as though there is a plan in place already. A plot of some kind against the two of us.
A warm tingle started at the nape of my neck and worked its way down my spine. I turned quickly. My eyes swept across the hall, looking for the source.
I felt my lip tilt up on one side and my shoulders relaxed when I saw Hermione on the stairs behind me.
She had changed out of her uniform and now wore blue jeans and a loose black and silver jumper. Her hair is hanging in waves past her shoulders. Her eyes are smoky and her lips are red.
My heart might have stuttered in my chest for a moment.
"Alright there, Malfoy?" She smiled as she descended the steps and stopped right in front of me.
"I am now." I leaned in and kissed her. I don't care if anyone else is around.
She smiled against my lips, but readily returned the kiss.
"Oh, for Salazar's sake!" Theo shoved my shoulder. "Quit that before you get sent to Azkaban for snogging in the corridors."
"We don't want that to happen, now do we?" Hermione laughed as she stepped back. "Did you have a good nap?"
My hand wrapped around hers as we made our way to the Great Hall for dinner.
"He was dreaming about homework." Theo grinned.
I punched him in the arm.
He deserved it.
[ - - - ]
Throughout dinner I kept thinking about whether or not I should have told Theo the truth.
He should probably know the big picture of what we are trying to accomplish, right?
Hell, maybe they all should know. They are all playing their part without even realizing it.
Would any of them back out if they knew how big this thing really is? If they knew it was more than sitting at different tables in the Great Hall and befriending people from different houses and blood statuses?
Or perhaps they already know the significance of our actions. They know, and they are taking a stand with us anyway.
"Are you going to tell me what has been on your mind all evening?" Hermione asked. "Or do I have to try to guess?"
We are in the sitting room. Curfew has passed and it is getting rather late. I suppose I have been quiet since dinner.
"I almost told Theo. About the Serpent and the Phoenix." I leaned forward and put my head in my hands. "I think…maybe…I should have told him. Maybe we should tell all of them."
She sat beside me and skimmed her hand in circles across my back. She inhaled deeply and released it slowly. I can see her thinking it through, just as I have been all evening.
"Alright." She leaned her head against my shoulder. "Tomorrow, after exams are over. We'll tell them then."
I shifted and wrapped my arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.
Perhaps she feels the same as I. That by revealing our destiny to our friends, we are committing ourselves to fulfill that for which we have been tasked.
We are accepting our fate, come what may.
My lips met hers in a heated kiss, which she returned fervently. The kiss quickly turned into a snogging session right there on the couch in front of the fire.
[ - - - ]
The second day of mid-year exams consisted of Transfiguration, Potions and Charms.
Hermione and I completed the Transfiguration exam at about the same time. I finished the Potions exam first, and she finished Charms long before I did. There were only a few students left in the room when I finally turned in my parchment.
I stepped out the door and scanned the corridor. Something had definitely happened whilst I completed my exam.
Hermione is standing by the windows with her arms crossed over her chest.
Ernie MacMillan is on the ground with his back to the wall and his hands cupped around his junk. Blood is dripping down the side of his face from a cut just below his eye.
Theo is standing between the two of them, glaring down at the wizard.
"What the Hell happened?" I crossed the corridor and stood in front of my witch. Her eyes darted up to meet mine. That fire that I love is there, dancing behind her irises. "Are you alright?"
Before she could answer, the classroom door opened once again.
"What is going on out here?" Professor Flitwick asked in his shrill voice that echoed down the corridor.
She closed her eyes, inhaled deeply, and stepped forward.
"Professor. I can explain." Her voice is steady, but her hands are still balled into fists.
"I think you better, Miss Granger." He raised an eyebrow.
Theo turned and caught my eye. We both remember what happened the last time she ended up in McGonagall's office. She was nearly expelled.
"Mr. MacMillan, do you need to go to the hospital wing?" Flitwick asked, bringing me back to the present situation.
"No." He ground out between his teeth.
"I did warn you to back away." Hermione crossed her arms over her chest and popped her hip out to one side. "Twice, actually."
He glared at her.
Flitwick pinched his nose and sighed.
"Your wand, Miss Granger." He held his hand out.
She rolled her eyes as he checked her wand for the latest spell cast.
"She physically assaulted me, Professor." Ernie slowly stood to his feet. "Like the muggle that she is."
Flitwick sighed again.
"You threatened me." She stepped forward. The anger in her voice is palpable. "Like the arsehole that you are."
He flinched. As well he should.
My hands settled on her waist and held her in place. She could be in enough trouble already. Punching him again would not help.
"Is this true?" Professor Flitwick asked Ernie.
"Of course not." His nose curled up on the end as the lie slid over his tongue. "She is paranoid. Obviously. No wonder she hasn't been in classes all term. She is a danger to everyone in this school."
"Hardly." She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "However, I have no problem defending myself, and I will do so, as needed."
"The war is over, Hermione." He readjusted himself and groaned in pain. "I guess you didn't get that memo."
I might have smirked a little in satisfaction at his discomfort. He deserved it.
"Keep telling yourself that, if it helps you sleep at night." She dismissed him and focused on Flitwick instead. "Professor, I really must go for a meeting at four o'clock. It was lovely to see you again."
"Miss Granger, I have to report this to the Headmistress."
"You should absolutely report this, Professor." She tossed her hair over her shoulder. "MacMillan openly threatened myself and Draco, and he physically intimidated me. If you don't report it to the Headmistress, I will. I assure you of that."
Before he could answer, she turned and walked away.
I caught up to her just around the corner. She didn't slow down, though. Not until we reached the fourth floor.
She stopped just outside of the Healer's door.
"Hermione?" I asked quietly. I can't read her right now. I have no idea what is going through her mind.
"Fine." She inhaled deeply. "I'm fine."
I don't know who she is trying to convince. Herself, maybe.
She is not fine.
Regardless, she lifted her hand and knocked on the door.
"I will probably be expelled now, thanks to that asshat." She balled her hands into tight fists at her side and started pacing back and forth in front of the healer's door.
I felt my lip tilt up at the sound of irritation in her voice. She is not on the verge of an anxiety attack. My shoulders relaxed just a little bit.
And I highly doubt McGonagall will actually expel her.
Right?
"Fucking arsehole." She muttered just as the door behind her opened.
Edinfield's eyes were wide as they darted from Hermione to me and back again.
"Watch your language, Miss Granger." He chastised her, then stepped back so we could enter his office.
[ - - - ]
Edinfield watched Hermione warily. Her knee is bouncing up and down rapidly. Her fingernails are clicking against the arm of the chair in rapid succession.
He is waiting for her to answer his question.
How are you doing today?
A simple enough question that is, in reality, anything but simple.
The silence in the room extended. The healer's eyes darted over to me for a moment before returning to the agitated witch in the chair next to me.
"Miss Granger," he leaned forward in his chair and tried to catch her gaze. "What is bothering you right now?"
Hermione rolled her eyes and kept tapping her fingernails on the wooden armrest.
Several minutes ticked away before he cleared his throat.
"That article in the Prophet last week must have been quite the shock." He opened his desk drawer and extracted a copy of the paper.
I groaned to myself.
Hermione stopped moving. The room fell completely silent without the sound of her fingernails clicking against wood.
"This incident that took place at Malfoy Manor during the war. You have not spoken of it before. Not here."
She lifted one eyebrow and resumed tapping her fingernails.
"I don't plan on speaking of it now, either." She scoffed, finally breaking her silence.
"You have survived many traumatic experiences, Miss Granger. We have discussed many of them, right here in this office. I have to wonder, what makes this one so different?" He leaned forward and tapped on the paper. "Why are you so reluctant to speak about this particular occurrence?"
Her eyes darted over to meet mine. For a brief moment, I saw uncertainty flash in her hazel depths. Then she blinked and it was gone.
Her hand covered her forearm.
"We were captured. I was tortured. We escaped." She leaned back in her chair and started tapping her fingernails against the arm of her chair once again.
Edinfield raised one eyebrow. He waited. The clock ticked in time to her fingernails. Or perhaps it was the other way around.
"People keep telling me how strong I was to resist her." She huffed a short laugh. "They don't understand. And they don't care. They see what they want to see."
I still can't read her. She still seems angry. Or she could be on the verge of an anxiety attack. Or she could easily slip into another bout of depression at any moment.
"What are they missing?" Edinfield leaned forward in his chair and clasped his hands together. His ever present quill is lying on the desk beside him.
"That karma is a bitch." Her lip tilted up on one side. She rolled her shoulders back and released a puff of air. "It was my penance. I deserved it. For what I did to my parents."
My heart sank in my chest. She hasn't forgiven herself yet.
Perhaps she never will.
For a brief moment, surprise followed by disappointment flickered across the healer's face.
Hermione didn't seem to notice it, but I did.
She crossed the room and stared out the window in silence.
"I did not defy her out of bravery." She turned around. Her eyes met the healer's. She spoke calmly when she continued with, "I wanted to die that day. I wanted her to kill me and it would finally be over."
The tone of her voice is a little sad, maybe, but there is no anxiety seeping through.
Her eyes drifted over to me.
She blinked her eyes rapidly in an attempt to stave off the tears. They fell anyway.
"After we escaped…" She closed her eyes and wiped the tears from her face.
My chest tightened. My hands curled into tight fists.
"I was…I was disappointed to still be alive." Her eyes met mine once again.
I want to cross the room and pull her into my arms. I want to hold her and comfort her.
But I don't. Not yet.
We have never discussed what happened after they escaped. I know bits from Harry and Ron. They told me their perspective.
To this day, she has never talked about it. Not with me. I have to assume not with anyone.
She took a deep, shaky breath and ran her hand through her hair. It was several long moments before she finally broke the silence in the room.
"The pain was all consuming. Every inch of my body hurt. I couldn't stand to be around anyone. Light. Sound. Touch. I couldn't take any of it." She rubbed her hands across her face and dropped her head back. "It was the worst migraine of my life, and it wouldn't end. I don't know how long I secluded myself. Days, I think. Maybe a week? And each day, when I tried to open my eyes or move, I wished that lunatic had killed me all over again."
She stared out the window. Her forehead rested against the glass. Still, I didn't move to hold her.
Edinfield waited, and so did I.
"After the pain subsided, the Darkness remained. It consumed me. It swallowed me whole." She curled in on herself. Her arms wrapped tight around her stomach. "Those little voices in my mind, telling me that no one cared about me. That I was completely alone. That I was meant to suffer. That I deserved everything I got, and then some."
I couldn't sit still any longer. I moved quickly across the room, taking long strides until I stood directly behind her. She turned and buried her face in my chest. Her arms wrapped around me and she gripped the back of my shirt tightly with both hands.
"I believed them." She took a deep, gasping breath. "I believed all of them. Gods, I was so stupid!"
Suddenly I understood the reason she doesn't talk about the day she was tortured at the wand of Bellatrix LeStrange.
I met Healer Edinfield's gaze and held it whilst Hermione cried in my arms.
He took a deep breath and nodded once as he released it. Then finally, for the first time during the session, he picked up his quill and started writing.
He understood, too.
It was her breaking point. The day she gave up any shred of hope that she had left.
I closed my eyes and held her a little tighter.
That day was my breaking point, as well.
Perhaps we broke at exactly the same moment, only to find each other months later and begin to heal together.
[ - - - ]
AN: Welcome back, readers. I know, my updates are a little slow right now. Yes, I am still writing. And yes, I still have every intention to finish this epic journey. Real life has been a bit hectic for me recently. I am hoping things will start to slow down now. Regardless, make sure you are following this story so you will get notifications when new updates are available.
If you could take a few short moments to leave me a review and let me know your thoughts on this chapter or the story in general, I would really appreciate them.
Until next time.
-mezy