Last week felt like a never-ending drag, consumed by studying and the looming dread of finals week. After this weekend, finals will begin, followed by just four half days left in the school year. With each passing day, my anxiety and restlessness clawed at me, making sleep feel impossibly out of reach. I found myself awake for days, trapped in a cycle where nothing could tire me enough to find rest. Bella was around, as always, but Jacob, Quil, Embry, and a few others from Sam's group returned to school on Wednesday. I didn't permit myself to engage with them in class or at lunch. I mostly hid away in the bathrooms or the library, unsure if I wanted them back in my life—maybe not even ever.
The thought of going to school filled me with dread. Rumors had spread like wildfire since they left, and now they seemed worse with their return. It was hard to navigate a day without feeling the weight of whispers and overhearing gossip in gym class that hung heavy in the air. I hated how it made me feel; I felt like I was suffocating under the pressure.
The attention made me feel trapped, and the constant chatter about me was unbearable. I couldn't even make new friends if I wanted to. People tended to avoid me, their silence or laughter cutting deeper than any words. I felt worthless like I was… something less. Last night, sleep eluded me, haunted by that lunch conversation where a group of girls approached my table. They talked to me for what felt like a fleeting moment before the mood shifted dramatically. It was as if they had rehearsed it all. They unleashed a torrent of insults—about my mom, my dad, Bella's disappearance, the boys, and my supposed "denial" of being close with all three of them. They targeted everything—my looks, my eyes, my hair, my body, my height. It felt devastatingly personal.
Finally, I grabbed my backpack and left the cafeteria, leaving the building behind. And now, here I am—everything is… disturbingly quiet.
But today, today feels different in a way I can't fully grasp. I woke up wrapped in a strange, heavy mood that suffocated my thoughts, blurring everything together. I couldn't bring myself to eat, and showering only amplified my discomfort, the water seeming to magnify the sensation of unseen bugs crawling over my skin. I wanted to peel it all away, desperate for relief from this pervasive unease. So, I gave in and stepped outside, surrendering to the need to just walk, to escape the chaos in my mind, if only for a little while.
I didn't know what I was doing here. I didn't know why I came here in the first place, but I wasn't going to turn back now. I couldn't turn back if I wanted to. I couldn't bring myself to stop and go back home. I was moving with a purpose; this mission I was currently on had never fully occurred to my conscious brain to the place where I was headed.
All I knew was that I wasn't going to leave this forest empty-handed. I was here hiking through the forest with the clothes on my back and my flashlight. No backpack, no boots. My flashing light and any body parts I could throw were my protection. The rain coming down from the sky was soaking the cuffs of my jeans and shins, soaking into my pink parka.
I sighed heavily looking around at the dark forest in front of me.
"Celeste." Bella beckons me forward with the soft call of her voice.
Stopping abruptly, I pivoted slowly, casting my gaze around in a tightening circle, desperately chasing the fading echoes of Bella's voice that danced hauntingly in the air. She was just a shadow in the distance, and as I swung the flashlight out in front of me, a shiver of unease slithered down my spine, quickening the cadence of my heartbeat. An instinctual dread washed over me, a palpable shift in the air signaled that something was drawing closer, something I could not see yet felt with every nerve ending.
Despite my body's instinct to freeze, I urged myself to keep moving, each step feeling like a battle against an invisible force urging me to stop. I trudged onward, the temperature around me plummeting, my feet numbing as icy rain seeped through my jeans and saturated my boots. It felt as if I were wading through thick, murky water, each stride laborious and slow, as if the ground itself conspired to hold me back. My fingers trembled uncontrollably, the flashlight quivering in my grip, illuminating the twisted trees that loomed menacingly around me. This was no longer a mere adventure; it was an alarming reality that surpassed the haunting imaginings I'd entertained in the safety of my dad's house.
Fears swirled in my mind—I couldn't let myself vanish into this darkness. I had to survive; I had to return to Dad. Every snap of twigs beneath my boots felt like a warning, and the wind howled through the treetops, a wild melody that shifted the rain's direction sporadically, drenching me further. Frustration surged through me as I smacked the flashlight against my palm, coaxing it back to life as its beam flickered uncertainly. Resolute, I pushed forward, determined to outlast the shadows, moving for what felt like an eternity—another thirty minutes swallowed by the night.
"Celeste." Bella's voice is mixed with Jacob's, Embry's and Quil's voices.
I stopped in my tracks and turned in a slow circle again, another eerie chill running up my spine and my heart picking up in its frantic flutter. Slowing my breathing to steady myself, turning in another slow circle my hand shivering in soaked gloves, turning to my left. My breath hitched, catching color more than twenty feet from me. My heartbeat is in my ears.
Déjà vu.
"Celeste." Jacob's voice broke through the hazy shadows, his figure just as indistinct as Bella's but alarmingly closer. Behind him, Embry and Quil lingered, their presence a looming reassurance, positioned nearer to Bella.
I stared at their silhouettes in the dim light, my mind racing. Why is Jacob here? What brings all of them to this place? And why was I seeing them now? Am I dreaming again? My fingers dug into my palm as I pinched myself hard. No—this was not a dream. This is reality.
"This is real," I repeated inwardly, desperate for conviction. My heart began to drown out the relentless patter of rain, the drumming sound replaced by the thunderous beat in my chest that threatened to drown me in panic.
A chill swept over me, the cold air biting at my cheeks until they prickled with numbness. The icy breeze snaked around my neck, raising the hairs along my spine in alarm. Everything around me seemed to slow down, each step towards them weighed down by an instinctual dread, as I turned my back on their hazy forms. I kept moving, compelled by a force I couldn't understand. My flashlight flickered ominously, casting erratic beams of light that seemed to weaken with each step I took. I tapped the device against my palm, urging it to stay alive as I drew closer to the white house, only to watch in despair as it sputtered and finally gave out, plunging me into an ominous darkness.
Yet amidst the shadows, a splash of vibrant color caught my eye, vivid against the dark, earthy tones of the forest floor. My heart pounded in my chest as I approached, my surroundings fading into insignificance. When I reached it, my breath caught: a piece of clothing lay discarded, its bright hue startling against the dullness of the underbrush. As I bent down, I could hardly believe the sight before me—a parka, unmistakable in its shape and color. I turned it over gently, and my heart sank. Within the lining, near the strap for hanging, was the name 'Isabella' stitched in delicate blue yarn, identical to my mother's intricate sewing. I had found her parka; it shouldn't have been here, lying abandoned on the forest floor, caked in mud and rain-soaked grime.
But what horrified me most was the unmistakable crimson staining across the front of the fabric—deep red, as if it had been a canvas for something tragic. Shreds of the material frayed at the edges hinted at a violent past. My heart shattered in my chest, splintering as grief crashed over me like a relentless wave, pulling me under. I crumpled to my knees, staring at the parka just out of reach, tears blurring my vision and rapidly forming a painful knot in my throat.
The realization pierced through me with chilling clarity; her blood had stained the parka, the mess of earth mingled uncaringly with the evidence of pain. I felt hollow, the weight of loss pressing down on me, shattering my very core. I felt my throat begin to close up like being constricted with an icy cold metal clamp.
"Celeste." Bella called again, closer than she was before.
I looked around, there was no one else here but us, for now. As I picked up the parka, I examined it in the dim light; its bright color was a stark contrast to the surrounding shadows. My instincts screamed at me to go home, and I realized that I had found what I needed. Yet, there was nothing else in the spot, nothing more than the parka itself. An unsettling feeling washed over me, as if someone were watching, their eyes burning into the back of my head. I wrenched myself up from the forest floor and scrambled to my feet, urgency coursing through me.
I turned and hurried back the way I had come, gripping the parka tightly in my right hand and the flashlight in the other. With each step, the eerie sensation deepened, as if something sinister were chasing me.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as I ran, uncertainty clouding my mind. Was I even heading in the right direction? My flashlight was dead, and I felt as though I was running for my life. My legs and lungs burned from the relentless sprint, and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I had never run this fast before; it would have put my PE mile run tests to shame.
A figure dropped down in front of me, I abruptly stopped myself, Bella ran into me like a linebacker preventing me from smacking into the threat in front of me, while screaming. And then I heard a loud, piercing sound of an animalistic growl behind me.
I screamed as I shoved myself backwards as whatever was in the darkness fighting off my attacker was making the ground shake from its mass. I can tell it's huge, but I can't see anything else. But Bella dragged me to my feet and pushed me forward in an angle to the right.
"Run!" She yelled at me, pushing me forward again, harsher this time.
I stumbled forward before I regained my footing, and I ran. I ran as fast as I could. I ran for my fucking life. I kept thinking about Dad, I never left a note for him. If I died out here today… No, no, I can't die out here, I won't die out here. I smacked into a body-contoured wall of stone.
My heart raced in my chest as I fell on my ass and stared up into the darkness. My forehead blooms with a sharp pain striking throughout my head, I put my hand over my forehead, picking myself up a bit disoriented. I shrieked when I felt a rush of wind, an icy hard hand wrapped around my right thigh and flung me into the air as I screamed, and I spun in the air doing summersault and the cold and hard hand wrapped around my left shin and slammed down into the earth on my back and right side. All the wind was knocked out of me, and pain from the impact, mud in my hair and all over and being washed away from the heavy rain. I can't feel my body with the amount adrenaline pumping and the strength my heartbeat, it was the only thing keeping alert and less disoriented, all I could hear was my heartbeat and my vision was compromised with white and black spots and the stormed darkened forestry.
I felt like I couldn't breathe no matter how much as I gasped for air, hysterically.
"Breathe! He can hear you! You need to scream!" Bella screams, standing beside me in the stormy forestry. "Scream! You need to scream!"
The hairs on the back of my neck stood up straight, my heartbeat was pounding in my ears as I managed to get back to my boot-clad feet. The flashlight came back to life, I snatched it up and Bella's parka scrambled to my feet again and hauled ass. I started screaming bloody murder when Edward jumped out in front of me, ready to pounce on me, heavy vibrations behind me, everything stilled as I pointed the flashlight in his face. His eyes were a rich red shade, pure crimson red, and his face was twisted in an expression of sinister hunger. The heavy vibrations behind me were getting closer with the sound of alarmed deep barking of a canine, multiple canines with the Earth shaking all around me as Edward lounged towards and my body reacted with a defensive high shriek. I felt the tears begin to stream down my face like tiny rivers, a snarl ripped through his gleaming teeth that were laced with venom. I threw myself backward, tripping and falling onto the forest floor as something massive jumped over me again with a ripping loud, territorial canine snarl.
Multiple snarls and snapping of jaws as I screamed and huddled on the forest floor as the gigantic wolves chased the immortal demon away from me. I got to my feet as the sounds and vibrations were beginning to fade in front of me, I scrambled to my feet and ran for my life in a different direction away from whatever had attacked Edward. I didn't want to be next, maybe they would smell my desire to live and leave me alone and take care of the demon.
And then everything got eerie again. Everything was still in frozen time, everything, even the rain flinging down from above stilled in the air. I shined my flashlight around as I spun in a slow, alert circle and shined it up into the treetops and around in front of me in the light beam.
Looking for Bella. I turned back around to her yellow parka in the distance, all the way back in the direction we came. I looked up at the sky and around as I considered following her home or continuing to search. She was in the direction of home behind me, and I was looking back towards the direction I was going. I had a bad feeling to keep going, Bella wasn't going in that direction so that meant to go home but we had to be close.
And then I stopped. Why was she so far away? Chills ran down my spine and my heart jumped into my throat. I decided not to take that chance of risking of my life just yet. It's definitely time to turn back home now, she was far away for a reason. I should run. I turned back around and then my heart stopped in my throat.
The red fire curls spilled around her head like a mane, wind-whipped. My flashlight spilled light all over her torso and illuminated her face, like light reflecting off the marble color of her flesh. My stomach dropped out of my ass.
Before my mouth could fully open to speak she grabbed me and the rush of her speed had me black out from the way she held me. I saw bits and pieces; my ears registered a few things. The whipping of wind past my ears, the jerks of my body with the echo of snarls. Inhuman all around. And then I was flying forward and grabbed by something icy harshly and continued to be jerked forward. The hand released me, and I released a shriek with my eyes snapping open to the feeling of open air. No ground beneath me, everything slowed down in a terrifying drag.
Lightning coursed through the sky at different angles, brightening the hurricane-darkened Earth. My heart jumped into my throat and ears hearing the rippling echoing sound of snarls and the heavy rain flinging from the sky. I was turning in a vertical circle but steadying out forward. And then I saw it. The lightning struck the violently angry ocean, the waves crashing harshly against the cliff walls.
The certain death below me.
And then I was falling. This was the end of my life, with the gravity of the earth pulling me harshly back to the surface. I wished I were anywhere but here, yet I found myself stuck in this moment. The jerk of descending in mid-air was something I never wanted to experience again. I should have run the moment I saw Bella in the distance, heading home; those two minutes of hesitation had determined my fate, and I was too blind to see it. I somersaulted slowly through the air. My eyes caught a glimpse of something falling above me, but I couldn't make it out.
I was plummeting to my death, destined to drown in this vast ocean. I didn't stop screaming until I crashed into a wave rolling over another wave. Darkness engulfed me. The frigid water instantly chilled my body. A sharp wave jerked me underwater and knocked the air from my lungs. I flailed desperately, searching for the surface. Another wave slammed into me, somersaulting me and forcing water into my lungs as panic set in.
My right leg was suddenly in pain as a wave crashed over me, causing me to jerk back from the water. As I lost consciousness, I felt something hot clamp onto my leg and wrap around my waist. Its grip was painful, but they held on tight. Still, I was sinking into darkness as my lungs screamed for air.
…
Something was hitting my chest.
"Come on, kid, breathe!" They were yelling at me; they said this a couple of times.
Something slammed down my chest again as Sam's voice invaded my water-logged ears. Rain is pelting over me.
"Breathe, Celestia!"
And then I realized Sam was slamming his fist down on my fist. Sam had been the one falling in the air after me, he had been the one that caught me in the water. That acknowledgement made me wake, immediately. I felt myself cough up the water that scorched my throat, I shot upright, coughing harshly and Sam helped me sit up and slammed his hand on my back. I coughed up the water and desperately gasped for air.
"Oh, thank God," Sam releases a heavy sigh of relief, he slams his hand on my back one more time and I coughed up the rest of the water.
My left hand flew to my throat as I gasped for air. The sea salt cut my throat, and every breath hurt more with each inhale and exhale.
"Victoria," I rasped trying to get my frozen body to move.
Sam helped me to my feet; he held me up with his hands wrapped around my forearms. I could feel his body heat radiating from him. Don't judge me but I wrapped my arms around his torso, he went rigid, he was so warm. I desperately needed heat, and he was the closest source.
"Celeste!" It was Embry in the distance.
"She's gone, kid. She's dead." Sam padded my head, uncomfortable
"Edward."
"He's gone. He ran off." Sam unlocked my arms from around him just as Embry was pushing him away from me.
I yelped when Embry picked me up off my feet, "Are you okay?"
"She's cold, Embry. Put her down, she's not a doll." Sam instructed, steely.
Embry put me back down on my feet, he kept his hold on me, "Jake is having a panic attack."
"Where is he?" Sam asked, concerned.
"Freaking out," Embry replies, Embry is moving my hair from my face and my neck, searching for anything.
"Let's go. Take her back to Billys. We have to find her father."
"Dad?" I repeated, trembling like a leaf.
"Go, Embry. I'll get Jacob. Once Jacob is back, get back out here." Sam instructs before he disappears in the darkness.
"Come on, Celeste." Embry went to take my hand.
"No, no, no, no," Panic arose within me, I grabbed onto his arm. "No, no, please."
"Celeste, we have to go." I made out Embry's face in the darkness, I felt his eyes scan my face. He must've seen what I wanted.
Embry picked up like a toddler—just like how I felt right now—and started running. I wrapped myself around him, trembling, my eyes sweeping over anything I could make out in the darkness. I tightened my grasp on him and soaked in his body heat as he ran off the beach and into the forest from the change of the sound of his feet on the earth. I kept my eyes as he ran.
Dad is missing?
Embry slowed down and I heard his feet against wood and then he unlocked one arm from around me and opened a door. I opened my eyes to Billy's house, the house was quiet but the lights were on as Embry bent down to the couch unlocking my limbs from him and I plopped down on the couch. Still trembling like a leaf and curling into a ball, I folded my arms over my head.
"Billy? Billy?!" Embry started calling throughout the house, "Shit! Billy!"
I looked up to Embry sprinting around the rooms and listening for the older man and then he sprinting out the open door.
"Billy!"
"Embry! Where is she?"
"She's inside! She's freaking out! Where is your dad?!"
Jacob was in the front doorway, "Old Quils!" Jacob shouted through the rain.
I sprung up from the couch, Jacob turned me as I flung myself at him. Jacob caught me and picked me up like Embry had, I wrapped myself around him like I had Embry, Jake closed the door and enclosed his arms tightly around me. Jacob walked out of the living room and the kitchen into the hallway and into his bedroom, I seen once when I had driven him home once in February, Quil and Embry had been with us that day too. It was the only time I had spent in a house alone with three boys for 15 minutes before I went home.
"It's all right." Jacob says, he went to put me down on his bed but I locked myself in place.
"No, no!"
"Celeste, you need to get out of these clothes, you have to shower."
"No."
"Celeste, please, I promise you can cling to me when you've changed. You're going to get sick, honey."
"Okay."
Jacob put me down on his bed and I looked myself over. I still had all of my clothes, my parka. My flashlight is gone along with my cassette player I had stuffed into my parka this morning for my walk. Jacob opened drawers and pulled clothes out, sweatpants and a black long-sleeve shirt, and handed them to me. He showed me to the bathroom and turned the water on for me since it was a specific instruction to turn it on, his house was really old for the bathroom to be picky. Jacob left the room and left the door open a couple of inches. I showered and got dressed as quickly as I could, and I found Jacob pacing up and down the hallway.
I followed Jacob around as he threw my wet clothes in the washer. Jacob picked me up again and walked back out to the living room and sat down on the couch. I curled up and he brought me closer, I tucked my head under his chin. My trembling had extended to him, but he calmed down faster than mine did, the silence between us said enough.
"Are you okay? Does anything hurt?" Jacob asks, checking a patch of my skin on my side that became exposed and straightened out the shirt.
"No," I replied, I tucked my hands under my chin and on his broad chest. "Dad is missing," I murmured as Jacob rubbed my thigh repeatedly to get heat spreading throughout my body.
"I know. They're looking for him… I should be out there."
"Please, don't leave me. Please, don't leave me again." My right hand grasped onto his bicep, the same arm that was rubbing my leg.
His right arm around my back tightened, bringing me closer if it was even possible, "I'm not going anywhere." His right hand opened for my hands, I gave my hands, and he took them both in his large hand and gently applied pressure. "I-Please forgive me for this," Jacob's left hand invades my shirt, and his hand held onto my opposite hip, the skin contact of his hand was burning my numb and frozen flesh.
I closed my eyes and melted into him, my chattering jaw increased as his body heat was battling the chill away and my body was trying to soak it up and get my insides to warm.
"I'm so sorry," He murmured to me as I was falling asleep. "I'm sorry, I won't him get near you again." I felt Jacob bring me closer as he laid down with me, and secured me in his arms again, his leg over mine and keeping them in place under his.
…
I woke up enveloped in heat. It reminded me of the morning I woke up on vacation in Phoenix, the heat from Jacob reminded me of exactly that. It was a bit suffocating, but I dealt for a few minutes, I didn't know If Jacob was sleeping, and I didn't want to wake him. But then I moved when the heat became too much, and I got my left arm free and the cooler air drafting around the bottom of the couch gave me little relief. The lights in the house are still on, the house was still quiet while the hurricane outside continued waging war.
"Celeste?" Jake asks quietly, shifting as I glanced up at him as he hovered over me.
"Hi, Jake," I whispered, my voice cracked from the roughness of my throat, and I swallowed.
"Hold on," Jacob freed himself from me, he swung his leg to the floor and got up from the couch with ease and the assistance of his long ass legs.
I sat up on the couch as he walked into the kitchen, I fixed the long-sleeved shirt that had rode up and pulled my dry, stringy hair from my face and sweating neck. I smelt like sea salt and sweat, my nose scrunched up and I kept my arms down, I didn't want to know what my armpits smelt like. I guess my shower hadn't mattered in the end.
He brought me a glass of water, "Let's get you home. Wait right here, I'll be right back." Jacob says as I take the cool glass from him, and he walks to the front door.
I watched him go, and I sat there on the couch for a couple of minutes. I was thinking about Dad, I was trying not to think of the worst. I swallowed the rising panic in my throat and drank the whole glass of water. I took the glass to the sink. I searched for my boots, they were in the hallway and I could hear the dryer running down the hallway. I put my boots back on and turned to the front door opening again.
"Come on." He urges softly from the doorway, "I'll bring your clothes to you later."
"Jake," I said quietly, huddled in a ball in the passenger seat of his car and looking at my house, it was dark and uninviting.
"Celeste." He says in the same quiet tone.
"You all are wolves… right?"
A pause of silence and the pressure of his gaze on the side of my face.
"Yeah." He replied quietly.
"Okay, just checking," I murmured, I didn't move.
"… Can you stay out of the woods? Please?"
"Yeah."
"We'll find Charlie."
"It's been… too long already."
"We'll find him."
"I'm sorry."
"What for?"
"For being untrustworthy."
"Untrustworthy? Celeste, why…?"
"You guys turned into wolves. I assume one of the reasons why you guys didn't say anything was because I was untrustworthy."
"That's not the reason we kept it from you."
"Then why couldn't anyone tell me anything? I mean, he's been out there for months and I can't do anything…"
"Celeste… I'm sorry we didn't say anything but we have rules and… I didn't want you to know."
"Why?"
"Because I didn't want you dragged it even though you already were. We were going to kill him and leave you be."
"Leave me be? Really?"
"Celeste."
"You guys were the only reason I got up in the morning…"
Another pause of silence and I felt a shameful wave wash over me for my selfishness.
"I know that it's dangerous but… I wanted to know… I thought you guys were going to die one of these days knowing that he's out there…"
"I'm sorry we worried you."
"I'm sorry for being selfish."
"Expressing your concerns isn't selfish."
I didn't say anything because I was going to apologize. Holding in my next apology was like trying to trap up an active volcano.
"I'm sorry."
"What for?"
"Apologizing."
"S'okay, Celeste." Jacob looked out the driver's window, "I got to go, let's get you inside.'
"You have to leave?"
"I have to search for Charlie. Make sure the leech doesn't come back."
I looked at the house, "Okay." I squeaked.
"The house is clear."
"How do you know?"
"Embry checked it before we left my house."
"Ah."
"You don't believe me?"
"No, I do. The house…" I looked back at the house and to him again, "The house looks like it's going to eat me."
"It's not the first time something wanted to eat you. Come on, I swear, it won't come to life."
"If it does, I'm pushing you in first."
Jacob cackled, it was music to my ears, "That's very nice." He says jokingly sarcastic.
"I bet wolf tastes nice to the house." I climbed over the seats—not putting my feet on the seats—to the open door where Jacob was standing.
"I'm sure you'll be a nice appetizer after the full-course meal." He says.
I went to climb out, but Jacob didn't move, I looked up at him, I couldn't see him in the darkness with the headlights off and the porch being non-existent. I could feel his gaze on me though. And then he moved, and I hopped out, I found his arm and he closed the door.
"Can you come back… when you find him?" I asked him as we walked up to the door and checked my pockets. My keys, my cassette player, are gone. In the ocean, gone. "Oh! My keys are in the ocean."
Jacob opened the front door, "They fell out of your pocket when you were being flung around like a freaking doll." His tone grew irritated but not at me.
"Definitely don't want to experience that again." I jumped when Jacob turned on the light.
"You all right?"
"Yeah."
Jacob handed me my keys, "And yes, I'll come back when we find Charlie."
"Okay."
"Don't worry, we'll be around." Jacob pushes hair out of my face before he disappears into the darkness of the stormy night.
…
I jumped up from the couch hearing the front door open while I was dozing off. Sam came in with my unconscious father slung over his shoulder. Jacob came in after him.
"His bedroom?" Sam asks.
"Last door at the end of the hall." I replied. "Is he okay?"
"He's fine, just sleeping." Sam says passing me and walking down the hallway.
I turned to Jacob as he walked up to me.
"He's fine, no injuries, no Edward. We found him unconscious. He'll be all right."
"He'll be just fine. Let's go, Jacob." Sam says walking out of the hallway and towards the front door.
I followed them to the door and watched them disappear again. I couldn't even say thank you.