"Thank you for coming to clarify the wild theories I was getting from Potter. I'll never fail to keep them out of trouble," McGonagall sighed, sitting down in the chair behind her desk. She pointed to the necklace that lay covered in a cloth. "That could have killed one of them."
"Aye," Hagrid agreed. "I love them, but there is always trouble following behind."
She smiled weakly. "I know you've always had a strong connection with them."
"Mostly it began on Dumbledore's orders," Hagrid admitted. "Supposed to be Harry's guide and all. But, I reckon all of them grew on me. Haven't had students like that in a long time." He wiped a tear from his eye as he thought about the day he met Harry.
They remained in silence until McGonagall's office door flew open and Snape practically ran through the door. "Are you alright?"
"Whatever are you talking about?" the witch asked with a huff, leaning back in her chair.
"Did you touch it?"
"Did you see Ms. Bell?"
"I asked if you touched it!"
"I'm not a bloody idiot, of course not!"
Snape used his wand to move the necklace in a desk away from her. "I saw the girl-managed to stop the spread. I'll take it from here. You two should go."
"I had this handled," she snapped, standing again. "And are you forgetting this is my office, Severus?"
"This is Dark Magic, Minerva," Snape replied. "I don't want you anywhere near it."
"Like I've never been near dark magic," she scoffed. "I fought Dark Wizards before you were born."
"And you were quite a bit younger then,-" Snape stopped, and Hagrid could see the color drain from his face. Anyone who made a comment on Minerva's age would regret it.
McGonagall's nostrils were flared. "I suggest you think about what you just said to me."
Snape stopped his examination of the necklace. "I'm-," He turned his stare towards the half-giant who was awkwardly standing there. "Why are you here?"
"Professor McGonagall asked me to help explain what happened…"
"Very well, you can go," he snapped.
"Sorry, Professor Snape."
"No, Hagrid, you can stay," Minerva said quickly.
Hagrid could feel his face turning red. "I don't know what to do 'ere, professors."
"I have to go," Snape said, picking up the necklace with magic.
"Where do you think you're taking that?"
"To examine it," he replied.
"This involves one of my students. We will do this together."
"Leave it be, Min."
Carefully, but aggressively, Minerva moved the necklace back to her desk with her wand. Hagrid wished he was Filius sized and could sink into the corner of the room as the two heads of houses fought. "We will do it together."
"Are you looking to get hurt?"
"I'm looking to do my job."
"I'm the defense against the dark arts professor."
"I'm as much the defense professor as you are," McGonagall scoffed. "It's not even been a full term. I am still your superior, Severus. You will sit and we will do this together."
Snape looked mad, but Hagrid knew he couldn't argue with her superiority in the staffing hierarchy. "I must insist-,"
"You can insist all you want. It doesn't change anything. As long as Albus is out doing Merlin knows what, I am your Headmistress."
Snape stared at her for a long time, but eventually sat at the chair across from her. "You know, Min. If I knew you weren't about to hex me, I would say this was a bit of a turn on."
Hagrid felt his cheeks turn bright red. Snape had clearly forgotten his presence, and he wanted to disappear more than ever. McGonagall was still standing, and while Snape was facing the opposite way of Hagrid, unable to see him cowering in the corner of the office, McGonagall could see his face and their eyes met. A smile cracked at the edge of McGonagall's lips, and she leaned on her windowsill. "Is it?" She made no move to tell Hagrid to leave. "Tell me more, and perhaps, I will let you examine it on your own." McGonagall looked at Hagrid with a sparkle in her eye, and Hagrid knew McGonagall well enough after all these years to know she was setting Snape up for embarrassment. He had clearly, somehow, in his anger, forgotten the presence of the half-giant in the room.
"I wish you'd let me do this on my own, Min. I know you can," his voice cracked with emotion. "I just…can't put you at any more risk after…" Hagrid knew he was referring to the attacks by Umbridge meant for him.
"I live for the risk."
"I know. That's why you're infuriating. One of us needs to survive this…I know you can handle yourself. Merlin, I know that better than anyone."
"And that turns you on?"
"Of course it does."
"Then, let me take the lead on this, Severus."
"I'd much rather you take the lead on something else." Severus stood and walked around her desk, putting his hands on her hips. McGonagall smiled at Hagrid over his shoulder as Severus sat on the desk and pulled McGonagall on top of his lap.
Hagrid was ready to run when McGonagall casually said, "You know. I think I agree with Severus on this one, Hagrid. You may go."
Snape shoved a laughing McGonagall off of him and whipped around. "Get out!"
McGonagall was keeled over laughing, and Hagrid smiled as he finally took his leave and shut the door behind him. From beyond the door, he heard Snape's booming voice. "What the bloody hell, Minerva?"
"Next time, don't question my abilities or my authority."
A thud came followed by a soft moan from McGonagall. "Headmistress or not," he groaned, so quietly Hagrid could barely hear. A belt unclipped. "I'm taking the lead on this one." Hagrid knew they'd been together for many years, and any reasonable witch or wizard knew that involved sex. Hagid couldn't have ever pictured, nor had he ever wanted to picture, the sexual side of their relationship. It was a reality he'd never thought about until that moment. Admittedly, as he heard the soft bangs against the wood of McGonagall's desk, he figured that the power dynamic and banter between the two over Quidditch must have made for a thrilling sex life.
The last thing he heard before darting down the hall was a sigh from Snape, the sound of lips on someone's neck, followed by Snape saying, "Merlin, I'm going to miss this." He didn't stick around to analyze what that meant.