The week before term started, Hermione started missing meals. Severus became worried on the second day of not seeing her at lunch and was determined to find her after his meeting with the Headmistress. As he walked through the corridor, he heard a retching sound coming from her office. He walked through the ajar door to see her bent over a wastepaper bin.
"Professor Granger are you quite alright?" he asked, as he strode over to her desk. He quickly scooped her hair out of her face. Hermione looked up at him. She was not alright. Her eyes had dark smudges under them and her skin was pasty white and clammy.
"Morning sickness has started," she stated defeatedly. "I haven't been able to keep much down in three days now."
"If you are able to walk, we are going to Madam Promfrey. We need to have you checked out." With that, he took her by the elbow and drew her to her feet. She stood without protest and allowed Severus to lead her out of the room.
They finally arrived at the Hospital Wing, after having to stop twice so that Hermione could vomit. It was a good thing Severus was so apt at Vanishing spells. He gently deposited Hermione into the first bed they came to while calling out for the Matron.
Madam Promfrey bustled out of her office, slightly annoyed at being summoned so harshly. But her tone shifted as soon as she saw the young woman lying on the bed.
"Oh, my dear. The pregnancy illness has started, hasn't it?" she cooed, as she Summoned a cool cloth and laid it across Hermione's forehead. "I took a chance and ordered Mummy's Illness Stopper. It's a pregnancy safe potion for morning sickness. It won't take away the nausea, but it will stop the vomiting. Let's have a look at you."
The mediwitch waved her wand over Hermione and symbols popped up above her. "Well, you are dehydrated, but everything else seems to be in order. Let's have a look at baby while I have you here." Madam Promfrey performed the same complicated wand movement and incantation from before and the pink glow bathed the room. The sphere was more defined than before with a flickering spot in the middle.
"Have you decided about whether to keep the pregnancy or not? You only have a few weeks left to decide," Madam Promfrey said, giving Hermione a thoughtful look.
"I'm keeping it. We're keeping it," Hermione replied, looking at Severus with a slight smile.
"Well! It's been sometime since the halls of Hogwarts had a baby, but you won't be the first teacher to raise a child here. Now, let's see about a due date." The Matron seemed practically giddy about the idea of a baby. She consulted a calendar and turned back to the couple.
"I predict the little one will make an appearance in late March! So, you'll be parents by Easter holidays!" She clasped her hands together and looked at them expectantly.
"Well, at least I'll be huge during the winter. I can cover it a bit easier," Hermione commented. "How often should I come see you?"
Madam Promfrey walked to her office and back out. "You'll need to come again in six weeks, and we'll go from there. Here is a list of books I recommend. One of them is a potions book for the expecting witch, which includes a nutritional potion you'll need to take daily. It also contains a litany of useful recipes for different ailments you might come across while expecting."
"Good. I can brew anything you need, Hermione," Severus interjected.
"I am a Potions Mistress, Severus. I can brew my own-," but her retort was spoiled by another bout of retching.
"You were saying?" Severus smirked, looking down at the witch with concern in his eyes. She responded with a fierce look of defiance.
"Once I take the illness potion, I'll be fine. I'll let you know if I need help," she said, wiping her mouth with the flannel.
"Indeed," he responded, knowing that he would have to force her to allow his help if she needed it. Madam Promfrey handed Hermione a small vial filled with a lavender liquid. She accepted it without hesitation and downed it in one gulp.
"Now, it should last you a week," the mediwitch was saying. "Come back for another dose when you vomit next." Hermione nodded and took a deep breath.
"There's nothing for the nausea?" she asked, a pleading look on her face.
"Not for during pregnancy, unfortunately. But I hear peppermint or ginger tea is helpful." Madam Promfrey patted her hand in a motherly way. "Now, I believe all of those books should be available in Hogsmeade. You'll need to start that nutritional potion as soon as possible."
After thanking Poppy, Severus walked Hermione out of the hospital wing.
"Do you feel up to going to Hogsmeade now? We could see about some tea and dinner while we're there." Perhaps they could consider this excursion as a date, he thought. It was almost funny to him that they hadn't been on an official date as of yet. Between staff meetings and curriculum preparation, they hadn't had much time to spend together except at meals. And it was a little difficult to hold any type of personal conversation at the staff table.
"Yes, I think so. I'd like to start reading as soon as I can. And it sounds like I need that nutritional potion as quickly as possible."
"Good," Severus responded, holding his arm out for her to take. She smiled and took it.
They chatted about curriculum as they walked down to the village. They arrived at the bookstore first. Hermione took out the slip of parchment Poppy had given her and quickly found the pregnancy and baby section. She promptly found A Witch's Guide to Magical Pregnancy and Childbirth of the Witch, but she didn't see Potions for the Expecting Witch.
"Perhaps, it's with the potion books?" Severus suggested, turning to walk that way. She followed without comment. Once in the Potions section of the store, he quickly pulled the book from the shelf.
"Oh good," Hermione said with relief. "This was the important one really."
"Was there anything else you wanted to look at while we're here?" Severus asked.
Hermione looked longingly at the rows and rows of books, but shook her head.
"I would, but I'm actually hungry now. But also still nauseated. It's hard to explain." She took the book from his hands and added it to the other two. "I'll just check out and then we can find somewhere to eat."
She walked towards the counter and Severus followed. The middle-aged witch working the till looked at the books and then glanced at Hermione's ring finger. She sniffed and read out the total. Hermione went pink and clenched her jaw. She paid the witch and was given a bag of her purchases. As they walked out, Hermione let out an annoyed huff.
"What a prude. What if I was just buying a gift or just for my own knowledge? How rude!"
Severus let out a sigh. He was not surprised by the cashier's reaction. But he didn't want to tell Hermione that. The magical world was far less forgiving than the Muggle world when it came to unwed pregnancy.
"Let's just get you something to eat. You'll feel better then."
They walked to a café nearby and sat down in a booth. Hermione ordered peppermint tea and a sandwich and chips. Severus ordered the special of the day: vegetable soup with a sandwich.
Hermione took a sip of her tea and sighed in relief. "This really does help the nausea. I may even finish a meal." She started in on her sandwich. Severus fidgeted with his spoon.
"Hermione," he started. He wasn't sure how to explain to her that the experience in the bookstore was going to become the normal. "The magical world can be very unforgiving."
"How do you mean?" she asked, pausing to take another sip of tea. Severus sighed.
"Witches do not have babies out of wedlock. It just isn't done. I just want you to be prepared for what's in store for you keeping this baby." He looked at her expectantly.
"Oh, come on," she said. "Surely there are some single mothers in the magical world."
"Name one single mother you know," he retorted, knowing she couldn't. She tilted her head, clearly working to come up with an example.
"Well, I can't think of one now, but surely there is one."
"Hermione. This will be more difficult than you realize, I fear." She looked at him like he had grown a second head.
"Yes, I know. I'll have to fight to keep my job-," He sighed.
"Hermione. You will have to get used to responses like the bookstore. Society will treat you differently. Being the Golden Girl may make it worse. And I'm not sure what will happen to the child." He stopped. He hadn't really taken into account how society would ostracize the child as a bastard. He couldn't bear it. He looked back to Hermione. She had gone quiet and had stopped eating.
"Are you suggesting I terminate it? That I made the wrong choice by keeping it?" she said, clear hurt in her words. He cringed. This was such a hard conversation.
"No! I'm not saying that. You have made the decision, and I told you I would support you and I do. I will love the child to the best of my ability and protect them as much as I can. But I want you to go into this with your eyes open to the reality."
She looked as if she was going to cry. "Then, how do I fix this? What do we do?"
Before he could stop himself, he blurted out, "Getting married would solve most things."
"WHAT?!" she exclaimed, nearly spilling her teacup.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have suggested that." He put his face in his hands, shaking his head with regret. What had he done? Of course she wouldn't want to marry him.
Hermione's hands started shaking. "But your serious. My only options really are termination or marriage?" She started breathing hard, nearly hyperventilating. Severus reached for her hands to try to calm her. She pulled away.
"How antiquated! What is wrong with the wizarding world that a woman can't just have a baby without a husband without ridicule." She was shaking and turning white again. "I have to go," she said suddenly, getting up without preamble. "I'm sorry, I have to go." And she left without another word.
Severus sat, stunned. He threw some sickles on the table and went to follow her but noticed she had left her bag from the bookstore. He picked it up and left the café. He had thought to catch up with her but then thought better of it. She probably needed some space. Hopefully, not too much space.
Hermione struggled to breathe. She Apperated back to the gates of Hogwarts and walked swiftly to her rooms. She was pacing back and forth, going over and over in her head the conversation she had just had with Severus.
She finally decided to Floo Ginny. She needed to talk this out with someone who knew the wizarding world society. As soon as her head was in the fire she shouted, "GINNY! I NEED YOU!" Harry was in the kitchen and jumped when she yelled.
"I'll, um, go get Ginny," he said a bit awkwardly. And he left to go get his wife. Less than a minute later, Ginny was squatting in front of the fireplace.
"Hermione, what's wrong?" she said, concern etched on her face.
"I need to talk through something. Please come through?" Hermione pleaded.
"Of course. Step back." Hermione pulled her head out of the fire and took several steps back. After a few moments, Ginny came stepping out of the green flames.
"What on earth has you so upset?!" Ginny exclaimed, taking in the scene of Hermione freaking out in front of her.
"Severus practically proposed." Hermione waited for Ginny to seem surprised, but her friend just looked at her.
"Ok. Let's sit down. And start from the beginning." Ginny gestured to Hermione's sitting area. Hermione huffed and took a seat in the armchair, while Ginny plopped onto the sofa.
"Did you hear me? He proposed! Why aren't you acting like that's the most ridiculous thing you've heard today!?" Hermione was getting slightly annoyed at her friend's lack of reaction. Ginny sighed.
"Hermione. You're having his baby. Of course he proposed. I'd be a little upset at him if he didn't. This isn't the muggle world. He has a responsibility to protect your reputation," Ginny said gently.
Hermione stared in disbelief at her. "So my only options are terminate the pregnancy or marry the father?"
"Well," Ginny started. "You could have the baby while not being married. But you know you would be demonized in the papers and become a social pariah. You would probably lose your job here when the Board of Governors found out. And you can forget about getting your Third Degree Potions title. They might even strip you of your first two degrees. Hermione, it will be hard if you choose that option. But it is an option."
Hermione took a steading breath as she took in her friend's words. Ginny continued.
"Why are you so opposed to marriage? I thought you said the two of you were getting along well. You said you liked him."
"Well, yes, I like him and I would like to see where our relationship goes, but to jump straight to marriage? It seems a little much."
"Hermione, people view marriage differently in the wizarding world. It's not always about love. In fact, arranged marriages are still fairly normal in some circles."
"Really? I..I thought I knew the wizarding world better." She felt stupid. Being a muggleborn had been hard when she first started at Hogwarts, but she thought she had caught up with her pureblood friends. I guess I was wrong, she thought sadly.
Ginny pulled her out of her self-loathing. "Tell me everything. I wanted to ask for details when you came over but figured you didn't want Harry hearing all the dirty details," she said with a devilish grin on her face.
Hermione smiled, a little embarrassed. "Well, I told you I walked in on Ron and Lavendar. I was so shocked. I shouldn't have been surprised though. Ron and I hadn't been on the same page for some time. I should have seen something like this coming."
"That isn't an excuse to cheat." Ginny said, folding her arms over her chest.
"No. You're right. I didn't even yell at him. I just stood there, gaping at them. Ron tried to excuse it away. And then he just broke up with me. Didn't even give me chance to break up with him. And then I just walked out. I was so stunned. I Apperated to Grimmald Place in a daze. I went to the library and found a bottle of Firewhiskey and just broke down. That's when Severus found me. And he was kind. And wanted to hear about my new job. And he started drinking with me. We were talking and laughing and then next thing I know, we're kissing. Gods, he is a good kisser."
Ginny laughed. "I'm trying to picture Professor Snape laughing. I'm not sure I've ever seen it."
"He does laugh! He just, well, he's different as a teacher. He has to be serious in Potions and Defense. They can be dangerous subjects if one doesn't pay attention."
Ginny smiled. "You seem very defensive of him. What happened after the kissing?"
Hermione flushed. "I don't really remember. But I woke up the next morning, naked in bed with him. And feeling very satisfied, if not hung over. So it must have been decent." Ginny doubled over with giggles.
"Oh Hermione! What happened the next morning?"
"It was very awkward at first. I threw up in front of him. But then he made me breakfast and we talked a little bit. At first, we decided to put the whole thing behind us since we would be working together so closely this year. But then we discovered the mix-up and things just, changed. The night before we had my appointment with Madam Promfrey, we ran into each other pacing the halls and it sort of ended…" Hermione stopped. She felt like a seventh year, giggling about snogging different boys.
"Yes?" Ginny egged her on.
"We slept together again." Hermione couldn't help but smile remembering that night.
"Hermione! Was it good? You weren't drunk that time, right?"
"It was so good. And no, no alcohol involved that time."
"It sounds like you two really like each other. Or at least have great chemistry."
"We do! And I love talking to him. He's so intelligent and talks about more than Quidditch," she responded, rolling her eyes at the end.
"How did he propose?"
"We were in Hogsmeade. We'd gone to the bookstore for some pregnancy books Madam Promfrey suggested and the cashier was a little rude. And then Severus started talking about how difficult it was going to be and then just said that things would be better if we got married. And it freaked me out." She paused, a sheepish expression on her face. "I sort of just left him there. I feel badly now, but I didn't know what to do or say. That's when I called you."
"Oh Hermione. Does he not feel the same way about you? And just proposed out of obligation?"
Hermione shifted in her chair. "No, he says he likes me as well. In fact, I think he used the word "enthralled"."
"I'm not seeing the problem. A man with whom you have amazing chemistry and is enthralled by you wants to marry you so you can raise your baby together. It sounds like a fairytale."
"It's just all so sudden. Ron and I were together for five years. It's only been five weeks since we broke up and now I'm talking marriage with another man!" Hermione felt tears coming and willed them back down. She'd done enough crying over Ron. She thought about her relationship with Ron. It had been comfortable. They hadn't had the passion and chemistry like she and Severus had. What if the chemistry wore off? What then? But no chemistry hadn't been stable either. Did she and Severus have what it took to be stable? They did work well together. Perhaps, even if the passion died, the shared cause of raising a child would keep them together and amicable. But what about after the child turned seventeen?
"What happens if we do get married and that chemistry dies? What then?"
"I don't have a crystal ball and I'm no good at divination. But sometimes you have to take a chance. Take a leap. And it seems like the two of you have a decent chance of making this work. Just don't throw out the idea of marriage without giving it a real chance." Ginny leaned over to take Hermione's hand. "Why don't the two of you come over for dinner next week? That way he can get to know us outside of the classroom. And so I can see this so called chemistry of which you speak," she said with a grin.
Hermione took a deep breath. "That sounds nice. I would like you all to get to know each other outside of Hogwarts." She dabbed at her eyes which had finally given up to tears. "Thank you, Ginny."
"Anytime," the redhead replied, standing up to give Hermione a hug. Hermione stood as well to embrace her friend. "Now, go find Snape and apologize for leaving him like that. I know you were scared, but good grief. You're a Gryffindor. Act like it."