AN: I'm pumped that we're getting a Rock band to do the OP for season 4. Sweet!
~Place~
She should have stopped it.
She should've made herself turn away when she had the chance.
But she couldn't
That was the real sin in all of this.
She couldn't, and wouldn't let herself turn away from him.
It had started so quietly and yet so quickly, that her long hidden emotions, and lack of experience, had kept her from resizing it sooner.
If she had seen it coming, she could have armed her heart, gated it off and kept her feelings at a distance.
But Ai didn't, and she couldn't.
Ai understands it, after it was already far too late.
That he loves her
And she him
She figured it out after she had already decided.
It started as a typical day, the mortal sky was a Grey sheet, snow was starting to fall and she was exceedingly restless. So she departed the eternal realm, instead opting for a rooftop, her usual area of choice, when she felt the need for solitude.
She sits alone, the rooftop her only companion, her thoughts a mess of dark questions with no possible answers. Ai ponders death, she wonders about the nearness of hers; if this suspended eternity will ever cease.
Her gaze is troubled and the gloomy day isn't helping her current mood. Her gaze is purposeless, fixed on nothing in particular. She can feel the frown growing on her face, she doesn't try to hide it.
Ai disregards the gentle flakes that fall, they only serve as reminders. Reminders of things better left forgotten. She shivers at the cold, but doesn't bother to protect herself from the chill of the day.
It doesn't matter anyways
"It's freezing up here Miss, might want to consider coming back, don't want to get sick." Ren says, appearing several paces away.
He'd been looking for an excuse to seek her out, but he couldn't find one. So, he decided to go and find her anyway.
"It doesn't matter." Ai says, voice deadpan
"It does ya' know." Ren replies, trying to stay casual, the concern he feels is instant, he's had time to adapt to the influx of emotion, that even her mere presence supplies him with.
Lately though, he's begun to feel the helplessness creep in. Ren still isn't used to seeing her; she had been gone for so long and appeared once more so suddenly, that since her return, he's found it hard to keep his cool around her.
Ren doesn't want to intrude, but he's missed the low cadence of her voice. He has the impression that lately, he's heard it less and less. He suspects the incident with Mikage Yuzuki has hit her hard. Ai had sacrificed herself for the girl, taking her place, so now she is eternally Hell's slave, with no hope of freedom.
Ren wonders if she's grieving, in her own way. He observes her back and the tenseness in her shoulders; she looks as if she's expecting a gun shot. He considers sitting with her, but by her current mood, he expects he'd just be rebuked.
Ren begins to retreat when she suddenly speaks up.
"Why does it matter?"
"Miss –"Ren begins to reply, but her voice stops him.
"Why do I matter to you?"
Ren can't speak, has he really been that transparent with his feelings? He thought he had been hiding it so well. He's an idiot, a fool; his other companions seemed completely unaware, but Ren could never be sure, they were good at keeping secrets. Ren thought he had been as well.
Apparently not
Ren carefully walks over to her, and gingerly sits beside her.
"You saved us, you gave us another chance, we're grateful to you…" Ren pauses for a second
"I'm grateful." He says quietly avoiding her question directly
A silence falls between them and Ren doesn't expect a reply, but after a few minutes, Ai turns to face him, her gaze suddenly fierce and intense
"Is that all?" Her voice is ever quiet, but Ren detects a note of something more, a melodious quality, almost akin to a purr.
A beat of silence, a pause in the universe, before with a bang the storm begins, the sparks ignite and the fire blazes to life. In what feels like seconds, they've moved to one another, their faces inches apart. The world seems to shrink in that moment, leaving them, if only for this short eternity; completely alone.
"No" Ren whispers, his voice low, exposed eye intent on her Red gaze.
The word has just barely escaped his lips when, suddenly, his confession is stolen, spirited away, overshadowed by his Mistresses sudden, yet hesitant kiss.
Ren is frozen for a split second, just as suddenly though, he unfreezes, reaching out to caress her face gently.
The kiss lasts for a few moments more, before Ai pulls back a few inches, just enough to regain her breath and some sense of control.
"Did that answer your question?" Ren smirks down at her, his thumb tracing her face lightly.
Ai seems to consider his words, sighs and leans into his touch.
She nods and lowers her gaze, cheeks a light pink.
"Good" Ren smiles softly, eyes unusually soft, as he gently brings her lips back to his own.
It was only after they pulled apart once more, that Ai feels the sudden, unexpected sting of tears on her face. She realized in an instant how she felt, about Ren. She loves him, had for a long time now.
She could never shut him out.
And that realization just caused her to cry harder, because with the sudden rush of joy, came a swift and unavoidable feeling of dreed. How would they be able to survive, with this new thing between them?
She doesn't know, but already Ai knows she'll do whatever is needed to keep him safe.
She vows it.
AN: So what'cha think? This is more a chapter then a drabble, but it's important and I wanted to put time into this one. I wanted to have this part of their relationship established pretty early on. In many stories involving these two and romance in general, it's about the buildup of the falling in love/will they, won't they get together.
I'd like to focus more on the building of the actual relationship and seeing how this sort of romance would be possible in their circumstances and even if they can have one.
As always, feedback keeps my motivational bunnies alive, truly!
Mia ^~^
Music:
The xx - Try