Chapter 96: Lost Friends
The war is over.
Giam did it. Every state in the Earth Kingdom, smoking, frightened, and broken *again, agreed to a federated government lead by Zaofu, recognized by the Avatar and other nations. In the meantime, armies and volunteers from the rest of the world poured in as part of a coordinated effort to rebuild. Now, dire squabbles of the Assembly's first sessions seem quaint. Borders opened. Reconstruction was *the* topic in every corner of civilization, which, thanks to Giam, was more united than ever.
...But the cost is incomprehensible. For the Avatar, it's personal.
In the summer sun, she flew into the top floor of the Yasuko Sato Building, headquarters of Future Industries, and caught Asami and Sara leaving a meeting. "Hey, everything alright?"
"All things considered," Asami replied.
"We still don't have contact with some company branches," Sara grimly added. "Uh, where's Ren?"
"That's what I came to ask you! Is he *still* with Kylie on that mountain hike?" They were both a mess when they left.
Asami shook her head. "She called, they're back. But Kylie still sounds shaky."
"She blurted out that she's going to Zaofu," Sara scratched her head. "I guess we should go with her, huh?"
"Knowing Kylie, she wants to bury herself in work." Asami could relate.
Korra raised an eyebrow. "But not Ren?"
They glanced at each other, and Sara spoke up. "I dunno. He didn't say a thing. I've kinda seen him like that before you two met, but..."
"Yeah," Korra murmured. "I know."
xXx
Korra swooped into the workshop loft through an open window, folding up her glider, then got distracted by her little pile of stuff. Zan's watch, Giam's pin, Aang's necklace, Hope's bracelet, Ren's bracelet... she put those last two on her wrist.
Phoebe's two blue panda lilies were healthy and blooming, leaning against each other like two good friends. It made her smile. But she refocused, found a few open drawers, and more downstairs, with a backpack on their table. "Ren?"
No answer. He wasn't on the workshop floor either, but she heard a metal clank in the basement. No one *ever* goes in the basement. Korra half expected to find an animal or spirit down there, but instead, found Ren sitting on the damp ground, running his hands along a long, open metal crate, the one that held bombs he used on Zaheer. "Ren?"
He flinched in surprise, but hardly moved. "Oh, uh, hey, Korra."
She kneeled beside him. "Why are you down here messing with that crate?"
"Nervous habit. I guess. Before we me met, I used to stare at them, and imagine what would happen if the tech got out..." Ren ran a hand along the indentations where the bombs sat. "I made them to frighten people, you know. Take a mountaintop off, and would that be enough to scare scientists away? If it doesn't, how long would the world last? A month, a year-"
"Ren." She gently turned his head, but he couldn't even look her in the eyes. "We're OK. The scientists aren't telling anyone. No one figured out what the bombs actually are, and the Assembly is clamping down on it."
"...For now."
"For *good*. Come on, get out of this stupid basement." Korra pulled him up, walked him into the kitchen, and looked at the backpack again. That wasn't from the hike. "Are you going somewhere?"
Ren shrunk even more, and blushed as Korra picked up a paper with Ren's scribbled handwriting laying on the table.
"'Korra. I'm going to walk the Earth Kingdom, and come to terms with what I've done. I-'" She could barely keep her voice steady. "'I can't be around you guys. You should be with Asami and Sara without me, like you asked. Like you deserve. -Ren.'"
The room turned silent enough to hear a pin drop. She read it again.
"...A note?" Korra, still in shock, let the paper float onto the table. "You were going to disappear, and leave this behind!?"
Ren winced and looked at his boots in shame, with a pained expression on his face, but didn't say anything, leaving the Avatar standing their in disbelief.
Korra picked the letter up and waved it around. "Where are you going? How long?"
He shook his head. "I don't know."
"What does this even mean!?" Korra torched the paper in her hand, and stepped forward, eyes watering, but narrowed with rage. "You can't be around me!? After everything we survived, you're... breaking up with me? Abandoning everyone!? With a freaking NOTE!?"
"I have to," he whimpered.
"Have to!? You have to leave all of us, even Kylie and I, without saying a word!? How could you DO that to us!?"
"I have to! I'm an abomination Korra! All that death-" He pointed out the window. "*I* showed Giam how to do it, knowing exactly what would happen!"
"For the hundredth time, it's not your fault!" Korra screamed back.
"It is. I could have taken the bomb to my grave, like mom, but built it because I'm a sad, spineless shell of a person. A coward." Ren clutched himself in grief. "I can't eat. I can't work. I sleep all day. I can't even look you in the eye or keep a straight face, and I have the blood of millions on my hands. Who would want to be with someone like that?" He shook his head. "Stop putting up with me, Korra. Be with Asami and Sara, like you asked. Let me go."
"I'm not letting you go!"
"Please!" Ren begged, finally looking up, with tears streaming down his face. "I... I can't be around y'all. There's no path forward for me-"
"DON'T SAY THAT!" Korra shrieked, bawling her eyes out and grabbing both his arms like he was about to float away. "You matter to me! Do you hear me!?"
Ren realized he repeated what Giam said right before he killed himself. "I didn't mean it like that. I... I, um, wouldn't do that," he unconvincingly asserted.
"That is *not* making me feel better." Neither was the pain she could feel radiating off him, so Korra wrapped him in the tightest hug she could manage. "None of us want you to disappear, Ren. We love you. Don't you get that?"
He didn't. Ren was incoherent, mind fogged with guilt and anguish. "I'm, sorry, but I can't be here. I can't face y'all. I can't..."
Korra rubbed his hair, and cried with him, knowing exactly how he felt, wanting to run away.
Wait.
"I'll go with you!" Korra exclaimed, pulling back and smirking sadly.
"...What?"
Korra wiped their tears away with her thumbs. "We'll walk the Earth Kingdom! Just you, me, and Naga. It'll be perfect!"
What? "I'm *horrible* company-"
"I don't care. You're my favorite person to hang out with, no matter what." Korra hopped up, folded up her armor, and madly threw supplies in her bag.
"But... Avatar stuff-"
"I'll do it on the way! I was going to the Earth Kingdom anyway." She darted back to the table, eyes wide, and zipped up her bag. "You packed?"
"Huh? Uh..." He peered into his backpack. "I think so-"
"Great! Let's go." Before Ren could comprehend what was happening, Korra hoisted him up by his arm, and dragged him out the door.
xXx
Korra literally launched Ren and Naga onto an airship already in the air, bound for Gaoling, She pointed out sights below, and made some radio calls, but Ren was stuck in his head.
Why did he go along with this? Korra doesn't get it. He doesn't want to put friends through the misery of being around him, and he doesn't have the energy to even keep up this act... he just couldn't do it. How could he explain that?
Naga nudged him, whined, and Ren idly rubbed her fur. "I know. I'm sorry, girl."
Then craters came into view. One was rippling in an obliterated town, lighting strikes making him twitch.
...He doesn't deserve this life. Staring into the devastation, Ren didn't know how he'd ever speak to his friends, or even his sister, again. He closed his eyes tight, and emptied his mind before he pulled that string anymore, because he knows exactly where that line of thought leads.
But before Ren knew it, the airship descended, and Korra excitedly plopped him onto Naga. Back to going through the motions. "Uh... where are we going?"
"To something I always wanted to show you..."
xXx
Ren found himself in an underground arena, brightly lit by crystals and overhead floodlights, squeezed into rock bleachers next to Naga. Eager fans were *packed* into the upper stands like sardines, and the lower stands were... empty?
"We have a *very* special event tonight!" a ring announcer yelled. "A challenge for our best champions against the one, the only, Dragon of the South!" The crowd already started cheering as he pointed to the entrance. "Avatar Korra!"
Out came the Avatar in her full set of armor, with the stripes of the Painted Lady bright under the light, and more strips of blood-red paint slapped on, just because. She spun around and waved as the crowd *roared* back. Naga barked excitedly. Ren didn't react, but he couldn't help but get his focus drawn to the show.
"Introducing her first opponent, but not the least! Our mighty champion, The Hippo!"
The largest human being Ren had ever seen stomped out, literally shaking the arena with each step, chomping rocks in his mouth. "Mmm, puny Avatar."
"Listen up, Hippo! You may be big, but you ain't bad!" Korra taunted. "Do all those rocks you eat go to your head?"
"Hippo... Mad!" With a jump and a stomp of his feet, he rocked the whole arena like a seesaw, shooting Korra into the tall ceiling, then landing in a dramatic crater after bouncing off the top. The Hippo cackled maniacally, but Korra popped up, and laughed back.
"That all you got!?"
The Hippo roared, and charged Korra like, well, a hippo. Bracing herself, Korra caught him with two columns of earth acting as big arms, spun him around, and lobbed him into the empty lower stands with a crash.
"Round one goes to the Avatar!" the announcer cheered.
Everyone roared in approval. The fight was staged, Ren realized, but it was so over-the-top and fun that he didn't care.
Korra went through fighter after fighter, including a comically scrawny 'Dai Li Agent' she booted out of the ring. Ren got more into it with each round, and found himself cheering with the crowd. But then the powered lights burst and flickered off, and spectators groaned. "Sorry folks, we're having some technical difficulties."
"Wait! I got this!" Korra yelled. With a low stomp, a powerful thrust of her arms, and a white flash of her eyes, she melted the pit around the arena into bright lava. Then she peeled off her armor, revealing a green Earth Kingdom tank top and simple pants. "Who's ready for a grand finale!?"
The crowd went *wild, with some whistling, and everyone cheering.
"Who will it be!? Who can stand up to the Avatar!?" Korra pointed to the stands... right at Ren. Then she yanked his stone seat out, bending it all the way into the arena. "Oh no! It's the ferocious! The mighty! Ren!" Korra hammed it up and faked a fearful expression, but winked at him, stepping back and covering her face while everyone cheered even louder.
Ren tried to process this turn of events as a tall wave of lava rushed forward. Fans screamed in earnest terror. Most people had never even *seen* lavabending, something Ren kinda forgot about.
Shaken out of shock, he anchored his stance, stretched forward, clapped open hands together, then slowly spread them apart, parting the wave around him as it flowed into the pit below. The crowd yelled in excitement, and the 'fight' was on.
Korra and Ren danced around each other, swirling like waterbenders, bending streams of lava back and forth. The Avatar ripped a steel beam from the ceiling and turned it into a bright pool, splattering liquid metal all around Ren. He returned the favor, bending blob after blob back, and the crowd loved every second.
He couldn't believe he was doing this. "Watch out, Avatar! It's getting hot in here."
She smirked back. "Better watch your footing!" Korra outright destroyed a corner of the square arena, melting the floor away and sending Ren stumbling forward. He did the same, forcing Korra to flip out of the way. The arena shrunk and shrunk, until the two were standing face to face on tiny column of rock, close enough to smell each other's sweat.
Korra flashed that huge smile. "I think we have a winner!" she dramatically declared, raising Ren's hand. The crowd went wild. Korra pecked Ren on the cheek, and waved back, *proud* to show off her partner to the world.
xXx
The promoter walked Ren and Korra out to the surface. "Sorry about the roof and stuff, I kinda got carried away," Korra apologized.
He let out a deep belly laugh, clutching his chest. "Sorry!? You two made me rich! Destroy my arena all you want, Avatar."
Korra laughed back. "I'll remember that."
"Say, you kids wanna go again? If I auction off the seats, we could make a fortune."
"Maybe in the Fall," she countered. It did seem to take people's minds off the Night War.
He rubbed his hands together, already imagining how much he'd make from the broadcast rights alone. Ren's expression was more worried. "What happened to those lights? It looked like they blew out."
The promotor frowned. "Power surges from them craters. Even outside the city, they're wreaking havoc..."
xXx
Korra and Ren rode Naga to a crater at the edge of the Gaoling, where military base used to stand. A stray bolt cracked overhead, and Korra gently rubbed Ren's shoulders to calm him.
They arrived to find a huge machine, with a fat cable leading away and a lone woman standing on the end. She spread her arms wide, and guided lighting from the crater, into one hand, out the opposite fingertips, and into the machine, making it spark and hum with power.
"Nice try. But even I can't dissipate it," Korra explained after hopping off Naga.
The lighting bending woman ended the arc and shook out her smoking fingers. "I figured as much, Avatar. But we can still make use of the things." She started another arc. "Look how much power we can get out of it!"
Ren rubbed his chin. "That's smart."
"...No, it's not. It's stupid!" Korra realized.
"Hey. What's that supposed to mean?" the woman balked.
"I'll be right back." Korra took to the skies with her glider, leaving Ren awkwardly standing there.
"She, uh, didn't mean that," he assured.
The woman shrugged. "Whatever. It's not my idea, not really."
"Who's is it?"
"My friend, Ykonu. She hacked an arc caster to capture real lightning. Crazy, right?"
"Amazing," Ren nodded.
"She's a dreamer like that," she proudly smiled. "Always tinkering, head chocked full of big ideas."
"Is she in Gaoling? I can talk to Kuvira, or Asami Sato. They'd recruit y'all on the spot."
"Ykonu was already a sergeant in Zaofu's army, stationed at this base," she slowly said, looking out to the crater as Ren's face dropped. "I, uh, wanna continue her legacy, I guess. It's what she would've wanted."
Guilt flooded Ren's heart. "Yeah... I'm sorry."
The woman sighed, nodded, and got back to work. Soon, Korra flew back, levitating a bundle of massive aluminum beams, not unlike the ones that held up the arena, shaking the earth as she set them down. The Avatar immediately ripped open the machine and started yanking out wires.
"Hey! What are you doing to my rig!?" the lighting bender demanded.
"Just a sec." Korra hyperfocused on rewiring the contraption's capacitor banks, a habit she picked up from Ren, and stuck her tongue out in concentration. "There!" With another flash of the Avatar State, she stuck one giant beam into the machine, and welded more and more together, until a huge metal rod stretched to the crater's center, electricity flowing along its length.
"Whoa," the woman gasped. Gauges spun. "We can't even dump that much power into the grid."
Korra grinned. "See?"
"It'll fade over time," Ren pointed out. But it seemed to stabilize the crater, safely shunting stray strikes away.
"Even if it does, this is game changing." She grabbed the Avatar's hand. "Thank you, Avatar Korra. This'll make rebuilding a heck of a lot easier."
"Don't thank me. Thank the guy who taught me this stuff..."
xXx
Ren felt a specter of hope, knowing the craters could at least be put to good use. But guilt still filled his heart, and petty anxiety settled in his stomach.
Korra picked a camping spot on a mountain slope overlooking Gaoling, and he was dreading it. Deep, long chats, big meals... Ren knew Korra would bombard him with attention, trying to make him feel better. It's pointless. This is exactly what he wanted to avoid. He doesn't have the mental energy to keep up with Korra, and even if he did, the last thing he wanted to do was burden her with his dark thoughts.
And that, fearing spending time with the most incredible person in the world, filled him with so much shame.
...But Korra didn't do any of that.
She didn't ask how he was doing. She knew. She didn't make him eat, or talk. Instead, Korra brewed sweet clove herbal tea over a lava pit, erected a stone tent, and leaned against Ren, gazing at Gaoling's skyline without saying a word as they sipped it from steaming stone cups. Eventually, they fell back into the tent, resting their heads on Naga's fur, looking at each other.
Korra brushed Ren's hair aside. "You're a good person, Ren. Try to get some sleep, OK?" She slowly kissed him on the lips, rolled over, and curled up against him, letting him spoon her from behind.
Ren almost told her she doesn't have to do this, but Korra is Korra. No one makes her do anything; she wouldn't be here if she didn't want to be. Instead, he fell asleep trying to think of something to say, too exhausted for his nightmares to haunt him, and too warm for the sting of his scars to wake him.
xXx
The next day, Asami woke up to a *scene* in Zaofu's outskirts. They contracted Future Industries to rush construction of a new dome, built to properly house the flood of refugees from stacked-up calamities. Kylie offered to manage it, and... Uh...
"You built it BACKWARDS!" Kylie screamed, making her engineers flinch and duck. In a fit of rage, she tore up bits of a skyscraper's foundation. "How could you be so dense!?"
"Sorry, ma'am."
"We have to start from scratch!"
"Kylie!" Asami called out, trotting down.
"What!?"
Asami recoiled too, but then leaned forward and hardened her expression. "This is Future Industries. We don't treat anyone like that, much less our own people."
"Then they should get it right!"
Asami held out an arm as Kylie tried to stomp away. "You're off the project, Kylie, as I can't have you abusing employees like that. Take some time to yourself."
"I don't need time off!" She gestured to the mass of refugees still camped outside the dome. "We need to get this done!"
Asami squeezed her shoulder. "You *need* to unwind. I'm worried about you as a friend, as much as a boss."
Kylie mumbled some curse under her breath and stormed off, swatting her hand away, leaving Asami with a hurt expression. Then someone from a crowd of uncomfortable onlookers stepped forward. "Mako?"
"Miss Sato," he bowed back.
Mako teased Asami with that formality, but that was the *least* of her worries. She walked up and hugged him. "Mako! I didn't know you were in Zaofu."
"I just got here with Bolin. Lin and Su asked me to come."
"Hold on... they're *getting along*?"
"I even saw Lin wearing a Zaofu robe," he said with a shrug. "The end of the world does strange things to people."
"Tell me about it," Asami groaned. "Sorry you had to see that."
"Actually, I think I get where Kylie's coming from... I'll talk to her."
Asami, arms already crossed, raised a suspicious eyebrow.
"Hey. I saw that look." He waved her off and walked away. "I'm not a *total* jerk."
Asami shook her head skeptically, but still smiled as he walked away.
xXx
Mako followed Kylie into the tunnels below the new dome, where she was kicking and yelling at some faulty construction equipment. His younger self would have made a bad joke, but now, he held is tongue, and simply sat down on a crate, watching her work up a sweat. She slowed, hands on her knees as she panted in exhaustion. "Shut up, Mako."
"Uh... hey to you, too."
"What!? I'm fine!" she snapped with a glare.
Mako raised an eyebrow.
"Urgh!" She kicked the faulty loader again, denting it, and slid against a wall, covering her face with her hands. "OK, I'm a wreck. Rub it in."
"I'm not rubbing anything in." He slid down next to Kylie. "The war was a nightmare, Kylie. Everyone is strung out."
"You don't get it!" She let that shout fade away, then sighed. "Sorry, but you don't. 'Everyone' just woke up to this nightmare, but Giam haunted me for years. You can't possibly understand."
"Try me."
She pulled her knees up to her chest. "OK... When Giam invaded our home, life as Ren and I knew it was over. But the bomb? That was the end of everything." She pulled them tighter. "Yet somehow, we survived our apocalypse. It feels like we reincarnated into a new life, but drug along all our baggage from home, memories too dangerous to leave our lips, yet impossible to live with." She looked up at Mako. "And *then* our worst nightmare jumped right out of our heads and into the world. How am I supposed to deal with that? It's like reality is tearing apart."
Mako's look turned sympathetic. "You weren't kidding earlier, were you? You really think you're losing it."
"Of course I'm losing it!" She looked away, voice wavering. "It's obvious, isn't it?"
Now Mako pulled his knees closer too. "That, I get. When Bolin and I were dumped onto the streets, I was an angry, bitter mess, lashing out at anyone who looked at us wrong. But the worst part?" He let a leg fall to the ground. "Bolin was all I had left, and for a while, I couldn't help him. I felt crazy, useless, like I failed my brother. That hurt me more than anything from the streets, and I know it's hurting you, too."
Kylie banged her head into her knees, then rubbed her face. "You got me. I'm too screwed up to help Ren when he needs me most. Happy?"
"No." Mako shook his head. "I don't have good advice. But if you feel rudderless, I can at least help with that."
"And how would you do that?"
He pulled himself up, but looked Kylie in the eye. "Lin told me refugees are disappearing, and asked me to look into it."
Kylie's face dropped. "I'll save you the trouble. Stray arcs from a crater probably got them, even if no one realized it yet."
"It *feels* like more than that. Either way, I could use a, uh, Zaofu insider to help me figure it out."
"Hmm." Kylie knew staying idle did her no good. "Well, you've got yourself one fussy insider." She accepted Mako's hand, pulling herself up, but her expression turned uncharacteristically meek. "Thanks for listening, Mako. I'm... not used to confessing outside the family."
"Neither am I. What do you say we both work on it?"
"Deal. But first, I've got some apologies to make..."
xXx
After a while, Ren decided to walk alone, though Korra made him swear to stay in touch with her.
He travelled to eastern ports, and through tiny villages. Some days, he rebuilt houses, sweating from the rigorous Earthbending. Others, he fixed up machines, and handed out food. Sometimes, he people watched, or hiked. But the one constant was the craters, and the misery they left behind, with people crying over lost loved ones, others burnt or disabled, and still more starving or sick.
In morbid curiosity, he looked for anyone 'scarred' by an arc like him, but there wasn't a single one. Why did he get to survive, when no one else did?
And so, he ended up where it all began. Ren hiked to the summit overlooking Bao Shui's valley, as close as he'd ever gotten since he ran. His favorite spot. But just like in the Spirit World, the valley was sterile. No plants, no birds, no ruins, just cold wind howling between the peaks, like the voices of the dead. Without any bending, he constructed a little rock cairn.
"What do I do?" he said out loud, not knowing who he was talking to. Dad? Neighbors, victims? Even Zaheer? "Everywhere I look, in every paper, every town, in every person's face, I see what I built. It's even hurting people I love... Is that my life, now? To watch my poison spread across the world?"
The valley was silent, except for the wind, and Ren's quiet sobbing.
xXx
Sleeping in Omashu's palace that night, Korra tossed and turned, drenched in sweat.
Back in the North Pole training compound, a blob of lava seared her skin, and Xai Bau's sword pierced her gut. His face was as cold as the freezing wind, that pain hotter than the molten rock... and it was nothing compared to the next shock.
She was in Zaofu, Father Glowworm's tentacles suffocating her as Naga whined. Senses heightened from the Avatar State, her vision went white as the elements were stripped from her body. And then, she was in the Tree of Time, with Vaatu ripping Raava out of her soul.
Her vision shifted to... the Foggy Swamp? Then the Tree of Time, and the Banyan Grove Tree again, back and forth, and saw a dark, shadowy version of her as her soul was torn in two.
"Aaah!" Korra shot up, gasping for air. Naga whined sadly, pawing at her friend.
"I'm OK, girl. Oh." Korra rubbed Naga's head, and realized she was in the Avatar State, with Raava and Vaatu's runes circling her chest.
"Breath, Korra," Raava soothed. "Dreams are no threat."
Light faded from Korra's eyes, and she got up to stretch. "Memories. Not dreams. Big difference." With their connection slowly settling over the past months, Korra sensed Vaatu's unease. "Never seen yourself like that, huh?"
"No," he admitted. Human mortality is so... vivid.
"You were angry, and scared, Vaatu. I get it. But you know, humans have this thing called 'forgiveness.'"
"I will never forget what Wan and Raava did," he seethed.
"And I can't forget what *you* did!" Earthbending guards looked on in shock as Korra passed by with her spirits out, always a little amusing to her. "But unlike you, I could die tomorrow, and I'm not gonna waste one more second holding some stupid grudge. Maybe you should try it sometime."
Vaatu smoldered in silence. In truth, this perspective, experiencing the world through a human avatar was... well, words couldn't capture it.
He wasn't sold.
...But he could see why Raava would stay.
xXx
More time passed.
Summer faded into early autumn, with the Earth Kingdom's vast forests turning amber, the air turning crisp, and the smell of the season's first falling leaves filling the air.
Korra traveled the countryside, shifting rivers, flattening plains, settling disputes, whatever the Avatar could do to help rebuild. But today, she reunited with Ren in Senlin Village, one of the first "crater boomtowns," as they were called. Entrepreneurs, engineers, eager workers and equipment filled a narrow path circling the crater near the original town, all there to take advantage of free energy while they could.
A memory of Aang's time in the village flashed through Korra's mind as she stepped out of City Hall, where she found Ren leaning against a pillar.
"How'd it go?"
"Great! I got Omashu to ship their ore hoard in, so the town can send food out. These guys will love it!"
"Turning into quite the diplomat, huh?" Ren smiled a little, and Korra playfully punched him on the shoulder.
"Hey! I *can* be diplomatic."
"Mhm," he dryly agreed.
"I am!" She leaned against the pillar in front of him. "You sure you don't want to go in? You're better at showing them how your stuff works."
"Nah, they'll figure it out. I wrote it all down."
"Wrote it down? Did you not help set up the power plant?"
"I, uh, I gave them everything they needed, and some extra."
Avoiding people. Again. "That's fine. C'mon, I saw moose lion steaks on a menu just down the street."
"I'll... pass. But you should pick some up for the road."
"But you love moose lion! Have you even eaten anything today?"
"I'm fine, just... not hungry."
He wasn't fine.
Ren was smiling, joking, staying busy, yet barely spoke to anyone but her. He still hadn't called Kylie, or anyone else, even after spending all that time alone. He's acting better...
But he's not.
Anger flashed in Korra's eyes. She wanted to smack him for being so stubborn, so selfish, for all but lying to her! But she bit her tongue, literally.
Ren has two modes when he gets like this. Shut down, or pretend to be OK... for the sake of people around him, not his own. And she didn't want to shut him down.
"Korra?" he asked, easily reading her.
Korra sighed and squeezed his arm. "Hang in there, Ren. Promise?"
The mask faltered. "I promise."
Still, Korra decided he needs a push, and she needs a break. "OK. But let's make a stop outside town."
xXx
Naga trotted through newer growth in the forest outside the village, though somewhat hesitant from bad memories. Korra and Ren hopped off at a clearing, where a circle of stone bear figures all bowed to a bigger one in the center, standing on its hind legs. "A shrine?"
"To Hei Bai, the guardian of this forest," Korra explained. "This is where a shirshu paralyzed Naga and me, where..."
As Korra uncomfortably trailed off, Ren remembered. "Where you were almost raped."
Korra nodded gravely. "Hei Bai possessed me, and saved me." She sat down in front of the statue, fists together in a meditative pose. "And I always meant to come back and thank him."
Her eyes lit up. Even in the fall, the Spirit Word felt close, no doubt due to the nearby crater... not that she needed to remind Ren. But in no time, thick bamboo sprouted in front of the shrine, and a big, docile panda bear meandered out. It grunted in recognition.
"You OK, Hei Bai? So much happened since I was last here." Hei Bai grunted at Korra again. "Yeah, I've been through a lot, too. What about your forest? Are all these people respecting it?"
It seemed like he was grunting yes, but looked in the direction of a crater. As guilt washed over Ren, Hei Bai turned his attention to him.
"Um, spirit? Hei Bai. Sorry. That hole in your home, its... it's my fault."
The forest spirit tilted its head, curious about how open Ren's souls is, as many spirits are. Then he started digging in the ground, before pulling something up and dropping it in Ren's lap.
He nervously brushed it off. "An acorn?"
Hei Bai closed his hands around it with a big paw, and Korra smiled. "Hei Bai isn't mad. He's trying to tell you the forest will grow back."
Ren silently turned it over in his hand, contemplating that, and Korra felt a little relief. She bowed to the placid spirit. "Thanks for saving me, Hei Bai. I'll keep an eye on your forest in this life, too."
xXx
In the aftermath of the Night War, Aera and Astraea flew the Spirit World, rescuing what spirits they could. So close to the solstice, countless spirits living in the mirror versions of human cities were obliterated. Others got stuck in fields of the toxic crystals left behind.
Even worse, most great spirits were *still* too snooty to lift a finger, tentacle, or whatever.
"Ugh, the Mother of Faces is a jerk," Astraea complained. "Was she always like that?"
"Pretty much," Aera agreed.
"Were *we* ever like that?"
"We weren't *that* bad. But being around humans changed us."
"Hmm," Astraea hummed.
"It took me time to realize it, too."
They dove, leveled off, and fluttered to the edge of a crater, rustling the grass under their claws. "Hey, this one doesn't feel so bad," Astraea observed. And it was surrounded with a low wall?
"This is an old one. Eventually, they cool off."
"Ohh," Astraea nodded. "...What are you staring at that spot for?"
"I was here before the Night War. It popped up out of nowhere with a blinding flash, then Ren came stumbling out of the center."
The sky spirits contemplated that twist of fate as an ox spirit came running up. "Help! My friend is trapped!"
Aera rolled her glowing eyes. Do Ox spirits never learn? "Again? I don't wanna be mean, but he did this before, and this crater isn't so dangerous anymore."
"Please!" the ox spirit begged. "He's my friend."
With a little hesitation, they flew the other ox spirit into the crater, landing where her friend was supposedly trapped. "He's not here."
"He was here! I promise!" The small ox jumped into a hole. "I saw him fall in from the other side."
The great spirits peered in. It was just a shallow hole with a little distortion, like the rest of the crater. Nothing weird... yet they looked at each other in concern. This wasn't the first spirit that supposedly went missing. Aera and Astraea wrote off others as tragic victims of blasts or crystals, yet had no explanation for this.
But what they mistook for anxiety was actually a trace of the aura left behind, meant to induce one thing.
Primal fear.
xXx
As Korra and Ren rested under a tree, biting into plump, juicy tomatoes a farmer gave them while Naga snored away in the sun, he spoke up. "...Sorry, Korra."
"Hm?" she asked, chewing.
"For that note, for wanting to run away, for being a mess, everything..." What's wrong with him? How did it take him this long to apologize? "You should be mad."
Korra swallowed, "Ren, I was upset because I did the same thing. I didn't talk my parents, Katara, or anyone escaping my training. You saw how much that hurt, and I couldn't *believe* you'd do that to us anyway."
"I'm sorry."
Korra sighed and turned her head forward. "I understand, I guess." She looked back from the corner of her eye. "Have you thought about radioing your sister? Sara or Asami? Even Jinora or Bolin? Everyone's worried."
Shame and guilt flooded Ren's face. "I know, waiting doesn't make it any easier."
"Ren-"
"I can't. Not yet."
"That's OK," she softly said. Oh, did she get that fear.
"Forget me for a second. What about you?" He put an arm around her, felt up and down her opposite arm, and read her face. "You're anxious. What are you thinking about?"
"About how the Avatar may never bend water again? About how the world almost ended, again? Take your pick." She slumped. "And my nightmares are getting worse. Raava says it's because nature is so out of balance."
"With all due respect, Raava is not omniscient," Ren argued. "...Remember how you used to hide that radio, and hum jazz in the White Lotus compound?"
Korra smiled a little. "I almost forgot. That's like ancient history."
Ren relaxed and closed his eyes, arm still around her back. "*The falling leaves drift by the window. The autumn leaves of red and gold.*"
"*I see your lips, the summer kisses. The sun-burned hands I used to hold*" Korra sang back.
They sang together. "*Since you went away, the days grow long. And soon I'll hear old winter's song. But I miss you most of all my darling. When autumn leaves start to fall.*"
Ren leaned into her ear, voice deep and soft, almost hypnotic. "When you see leaves fall in your dreams, think of this song, and everywhere you heard it. Let it carry you back."
"I'll try," she promised, already feeling better. Oh, how could Ren think he's so toxic to the world, much less to her?
xXx
Mako, Kylie, Bolin and Anah met at the base of a mountain, near the edge Zaofu's massive refugee camp, to follow up on the latest lead. "Mako!" Bolin grabbed his brother's hand. "See!? I told ya you'd like Zaofu."
"Try to focus, Bolin."
"I am focused!" he protested. "...Uh, remind me, what exactly are we looking for?"
Kylie jutted in. "A missing kid. Her dad told us she plays in these caves."
"Red Lotus tunnels." Anah shrunk a little. "Not my favorite place in the world."
"Aww come on. Three earthbenders underground, what could happen!?" Bolin enthused, flipping on his miner's helmet and pulling Anah along towards the entrance. "Oh, and we have Mako, too."
Kylie chuckled, and teasingly patted his shoulder. "Yeah, Mako. We appreciate you coming along as emotional support."
Mako sighed tiredly. Anah, having grown up exploring these tunnels, led the way in with Bolin, clenching his hand, while letting Mako and Kylie trail behind. Distracted, watching them giggle and carry on, Kylie nudged Mako to get his attention. "They're adorable together. Like, diabetically sweet."
"It gives me a headache," Mako agreed.
"Mm hm. Complain all you want, I can tell you're happy for them."
"I am." Mako cracked a weak smile. "Not that I'm used to it. One day, I blink, and Bolin's met the Avatar, shot off and made this crazy life for himself."
"That's *called* watching your little brother grow up..." Now it was Kylie's turn to sigh. "Shit. I hope Ren is OK."
"He's with Korra, he's fine. Maybe some space is what he needs."
"We give each other plenty of space, but *not* over this, Mako."
"But that's what you don't get." Mako ducked under a low stalactite, still holding a flame in his hand for light. "Like it or not, it's not just you two against the world anymore... Ah, monkey feathers." Mako held up his red scarf out, nearly ripped in half by a tall stalagmite. "Great."
"Sentimental, much? You wear that ragged thing everywhere."
Mako's face turned sad. "This scarf was my father's, and it's all I have left of him. I just feel like... Like it keeps me safe. Stupid, I know."
Now Kylie felt horrible, and held out a hand. "Give it here."
"This isn't funny, Kylie."
"I'm not teasing." Ugh, her and her sour attitude. Desperate to sound earnest, she offered something she's never offered anyone.
In Kylie's hand was a bluish metal band with copper and gold woven in. Mako hesitantly took it. "An armband... OK? It is beautiful."
"Dad gave this bracelet to Isha when they met. I've worn it every day since they died."
"He made it?"
"He did, and showed me how to weave metal." Kylie opened her palm again. "I'll be careful, I promise."
Mako hesitated, but put San's scarf in her hand. She held it up, bent a spool of thin blue metal thread out of her pocket, and twirled her fingers, poking strands up and down through the fabric in a near perfect, shining pattern down the center. "Better?"
He traded the armband for the scarf, and ran a finger along the cross-hatching. "Much. Thank you."
"Anytime. And... keeping it isn't stupid, Mako. Sentimental, maybe." Kylie bent the armband back onto her bicep. "But this band makes me feel happy, too, and there's nothing wrong with that."
They shared a silent, sympathetic smile, then kept going.
After walking deeper to the tunnels, Anah suddenly stopped dead. Kylie's heart beat out of her chest, *vividly* picturing the sand shark Anah sensed the last time this happened. "Duck!" Anah ordered.
"Wha-" Mako started.
"She said duck!" Kylie pulled Mako onto the ground, and not a second later, the walls exploded around them. A badgermole snarled through the dust, barring its teeth in rage. It tried to collapse the tunnel on them, but Bolin was quick enough to hold it up.
"Wait!" Anah screamed as Mako got ready to burn it. "Don't piss it off!"
"It's already pissed off!" Mako yelled back.
Kylie got ready to slice it open, too, but Anah hesitantly stepped forward. "Easy, girl. We don't want-"
It hissed back, clawing the ground like it was about to charge. "Wait, I read about this!" Bolin exclaimed. Not content to let his girlfriend get mauled, he stepped right in front of the beast and started... *singing*.
"*Two lovers, forbidden from one another.*"
"*A war divides their people.*"
Mako pictured writing 'Bolin, lovable idiot,' on his grave until he realized it was working. The badgermole stilled, with its vestigial yellow eyes opening wide like it recognized the song.
"*And a mountain divides them apart.*"
"*Built a path to be together...*" Bolin winced. "Yeah, I forget the next couple of lines, help me out?"
Ana giggled, stepped next to Bolin and skipped to the good part with him.
"*Secret tunnel!*"
"*Secret tunnel!*"
"*Through the mountain!*"
"*Secret, secret, secret, secret tunnel! Yeah!*"
The badgermole tranquilly sat down, shaking the ground, with Mako and Kylie gaping in disbelief. Bolin stepped forward and rubbed its nose. "See? We're not gonna hurt you."
Anah did the same, and the beast whimpered and lowered its ears. "I think she's sad, Bo."
Bolin noticed the cuts and missing fur covering its body. "Aww. What's wrong, girl? How'd you get so beat up?"
Seeming to understand, the beast turned around and led them through its wide tunnel with a limp. It opened up to a big cave, lit by green crystals above and tiny campfire in the center, with more tunnels and coves dug out.
"This is a badgermole den, a *big* one," Anah marveled. "And look at this table. A banjo, snacks... whoa, this girl must have made friends with the whole clan."
"The teapot is barely warm," Kylie observed.
Mako rubbed his chin, and his brother let an idle thought fly. "Oh, hey, I remember the last part of the lyrics!" He cleared his throat. "*And diiee!*"
Kylie thoroughly enjoyed watching Bolin torment his brother, but her amused look dropped when they rounded the corner. Anah and Bolin clung to each other in horror. Kylie covered her mouth. Even Mako flinched.
The cave walls were splattered with blood, fur, claws, teeth, broken stalactites, shattered stone and more. Mako kneeled on the ground, rubbing some blood between his fingers. "This is human blood. And look, scorch marks. Seems like a firebender *defended* the badgermoles." After spotting a glint in the dim light, he grimly held up a shoe.
"That lost girl is a firebender," Kylie realized. "...Oh no."
The beast sadly sat down in the carnage. "She lost her whole family." Anah soothingly stroked its fur. "What happened!? Who could possibly take on a badgermole clan under their own mountain?"
"Poachers?" Bolin guessed, barely keeping his lunch down.
"No way. *Maybe* a crack squad of Red Lotus, going for the girl?" Kylie weakly theorized. "Who else could?"
"It doesn't fit their MO. Why attack some poor kid, here, where it's practically suicide?" Mako stood up and looked around. "And where are the bodies?"
There was no answer. Just sad whines of the lone badgermole echoing through the cavern.
While the others stood in shock, Mako analyzed. This fit the pattern of missing refugees. Rich or poor, old or young, it was always someone alone. A classic serial killer case, right?
Except he'd dealt with serial killers. He'd seen the aftermath of grisly gang fights, messes from animal smuggling rings, even the Avatar's wrath. But this...
Mako looked up, and saw the badgermole staring at him as Anah stroked it from the side, fear written across their faces. "Don't tell me you're thinking it too," Anah nervously said.
"You tell me. Could a spirit do this, Anah?"
The beast whined, and Anah clutched her fur tighter, as she knew exactly what spirit he was referring to.
Father Glowworm.
"Yes. It could," Anah said, too shaky to even speak the name.
xXx
Near the southern coast of the Earth Kingdom, as the sun set, Korra and Ren rode Naga into a tiny port town. But what used to be a modest harbor with old wooden boats overflowed with traders from every nation, unloading tech, vehicles, supplies, everything needed to rebuild. Seeing all the aid, some refugees who came to catch rides changed their minds.
But Korra pulled Ren into a tavern, lit by the warm light of torches, adorned with fishing nets and some Water Tribe artifacts, the air filled with chatter from couples dancing to slow music and drinking. They leaned against the bar. "This spot marks my first attempt at romance," Korra confessed.
"With Zan?" The guy who drugged and enslaved her?
"Where I had my first and *last* drink," she chuckled. "Oh, he was a charmer."
"...He was tall, right?"
"And rugged. And dashing... But he didn't have your eyes," Korra teased. "Come on, wanna dance?"
"Whoa, what?" Ren exclaimed as she tugged on his arm. "I dunno..."
Korra pouted. "Don't overthink it. C'mon, please? For me?"
Ren hesitated, but Korra's pleading eyes won out. They ended up on the floor, dancing to slow, instrumental jazz, lazily swaying back and forth, voices barely a hum. "You know, this tavern kinda broke my heart," Korra said. "After that, I thought I'd never trust anyone with who I really am, you know?"
"I know the feeling."
Korra leaned forward, and rested her head and hands on Ren's shoulders, pulling him close and closing her eyes.
Ren wrapped his arms around the small of her back, resting his chin on her hair, and closed his eyes too, like he was in a trance. But soon, Korra felt him stiffen up. "I know what you're thinking." Ugh, telling him what Asami asked right before Giam popped up was such shit timing, she thought.
"It's OK," he mumbled.
"It's not." Korra pulled back, still swaying just a little. "Talk to me."
It felt impossible, but Ren forced himself to meet her eyes. "I... I know you care, but I want you to be happy. Please. Be with people you love, not someone who's gonna drag you under."
Her expression softened even more. "Yeah, I like Sara. I like Asami." Korra cupped Ren's cheek, and brushed her nose against his. "But you're my soul, Ren. You *know* parts of me no one else will ever see, just like I know you. And I am *not* replacing you." Korra tilted her head and kissed Ren softly, lingering over his lips when they parted. "I love you." Tenderly kissing him again, she kept going and going until Ren started kissing back, completely lost to the moment.