Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon Sailor Stars: Chaos Theory
Act 81: Small Lady
By: Sora Kazeno
Sailor Cosmos arrives at the Galaxy Cauldron well ahead of Sailor Galaxia, frantic to find Chibi Usa's starseed. Her eyes stare at the barren ground. She thinks back to her conversation with Karin regarding all of the starseeds residing here. Somehow Karin was able to summon them using her rings. She has to do the same. If Chibi Usa is here she has to succeed. She closes her eyes tightly trying to find her daughter's light.
The star on her forehead flashes as she scans the area. Her heart skips a beat when she finds it. It is faint but it is present within the cauldron. Tears cascade down her face and onto her rings creating a bright glow. Suddenly the entire ground is glowing as orange flowers begin to appear. Her eyes dart back and forth looking for Chibi Usa's starseed.
She recognizes the warmth. She takes a few steps forward in the direction and the feeling grows slightly. She sprints forward and with each step the intensity of Chibi Usa's light becomes stronger.
She collapses in front of an orange flower on the ground, gingerly touching its petals. The flower buds revealing a bright pale pink starseed. It hovers above the bloomed flower.
Sailor Cosmos stares at the starseed before a loud sob escapes her lips. She grabs the starseed and hugs it to her brooch. Her head lowers enough so her chin reaches her hands. She can't speak as she cries.
Sailor Galaxia finally caught up with the Guardian. She doesn't say a word as she watches the sight before her. Her eyes display sympathy. While this is heartbreaking to watch she is thankful the child's starseed was found and is no longer missing. She wishes Queen Kakyuu will have answers one day as well.
Mamoru bangs loudly on the Outer's apartment door. He has to tell them everything that happened. What Usako kept from all of them.
Haruka yanks the door open annoyed at the sudden disturbance. "Mamoru-san?" She looks at him questioningly. She wasn't expecting to see him today. "Did something happen?"
"I need to talk to everyone immediately," Mamoru quickly answers, his voice panicked.
The Senshi of the Wind doesn't hesitate as she lets him inside and quickly gathers the other three senshi. They all sit in the living room.
The four women stare at Mamoru intently unsure of what he is about to them.
He takes a deep breath before he begins. His mind is still reeling with what he learned just a little while ago. "I know why Usako attacked Setsuna-san and what changed." He is direct, telling them the most important parts first.
Haruka moves closer to the edge of her seat in anticipation. Finally, answers.
Michiru keeps her hands folded on her lap.
Setsuna is relieved to have this mystery solved.
Hotaru stares at him, waiting for him to continue.
He gathers his thoughts. It's hard to say this out loud. Once he does, it will make it real. "The timeline Usako was sent to… she…" He pauses, this is harder for him to repeat than he imagined. "She… was already pregnant with Chibi Usa and when she came back to this timeline she was also pregnant." He can't keep the lump forming in his throat he struggles to continue. He hates using the phrase was. He wishes he could say currently.
Hotaru is excited at this information. She can see her best friend again. "You mean Chibi Usa-chan will be born in this timeline?"
Mamoru can't answer her verbally and shakes his head no.
The teal haired woman is alarmed by Mamoru's response. "What happened?" Her normally calm voice laced with worry.
Setsuna is starting to put pieces together. "She used her powers as Sailor Cosmos repeatedly when she was pregnant? That is extremely dangerous." She stops, fearing the worst.
Haruka's focus is now on the oldest person in the room. "What do you mean?"
"When a senshi uses their powers when they are expecting they run the risk of…" her voice trails off already assuming the worst. "Small Lady…" She can't finish asking the question, the words are stuck in her throat.
Mamoru looks down at his hands as he tries to explain the rest. If he looks at them he knows he's going to break down as his mind is finally starting to process the events. "The entire time she didn't know she was pregnant. When she was on Kinmoku… she… she lost Chibi Usa." He can't bring himself to say had a miscarriage.
"No!" Hotaru yells loudly. For a few minutes she had hope to see her best friend again only for the chance to taken away so quickly.
"Kitten…" Haruka murmurs as she starts to understand her Queen's actions.
Michiru grabs Haruka's arm as she is speechless.
Setsuna can't speak as she starts to cry. How could she have not realized she sent Usagi to a timeline where she was pregnant with Small Lady? Small Lady could have been born into this timeline if they had known she was pregnant. The child never would have been lost. She takes a few minutes to get herself together before she asks, "Are you sure? How did you find out?"
"Yes. I heard this from Fighter out of all people," Mamoru begins to explain how Sailor Star Fighter was a part of their training session, the appearance of Sailor Galaxia, and what transpired afterward.
Sailor Star Fighter's demeanor changes from one of anger to pity.
Seeing how the Starlight was now looking at him further fueled King Endymion's anger. He looks over at Sailor Earth for a moment as if to ask what is going on. Why did Cosmos say Chibi Usa's name before leaving?
Fighter uses the moment to twist out of the King's grip. Once she places a little distance between them she responds, "You really need to have this conversation with Odango."
"She isn't here and you're the only one around here with answers." King Endymion growls. "I'm not letting you leave until I have those answers."
Sailor Star Fighter smirks. "Somehow I doubt that. You're not strong enough to stop me," her arrogant side is showing. Sailor Cosmos once spoke similar words to Uranus and Neptune when they didn't want her to go Kinmoku the first time. Fighter doesn't care if he is the King of Earth, he can't stop her.
King Endymion continues, "What do you think will happen when you return to Earth? I'll find you wherever you are. I don't care if you're in a press conference or on stage singing." He is making his point clear. He demands answers and one way or another he is going to get them.
Fighter glares at the older man. He's really persistent when he wants to be. It is clear he is determined and is not going to let this go. She witnessed that first hand when Mamoru continued to pursue Odango.
Sailor Earth can see her brother is about to lose control and attacking Fighter will end poorly for all of them. She tries a different approach. "When Sailor Cosmos attacked Sailor Pluto she had said something changed in the timeline… does this have to do with the little girl?"
King Endymion looks wide eyed at his sister. He was too angry to think about this logically. Reason is starting to kick back in. He turns back to Fighter. "Please tell me what happened."
Sailor Star Fighter can't see a way out of this. They are starting to put everything together. Maybe it is better this way to spare Odango this conversation. It could be hours before she returns to Earth. She sighs. "Sailor Pluto sent her to a timeline where she was…" She struggles with saying the word. "…she was pregnant."
King Endymion's face pales when he hears this statement.
"Was…?" Sailor Earth stares at the Starlight intently waiting for her to continue.
Fighter tries to keep her emotions in check as she recalls some of the most horrific events of Sailor Cosmos' life. "She didn't know she was pregnant when she went to Kinmoku."
"It's dangerous to be a senshi when you're pregnant…" Sailor Earth adds, shifting her balance to her other foot. "My god…"
Fighter slowly nods her head. "She… miscarried that child on Kinmoku. The child's starseed burned out… it nearly killed her. It would have killed any other senshi. As soon as she learned the child was from the other timeline she returned to Earth… and you know the rest." Fighter finishes quickly.
Mamoru looks at the four people in the living room beside him as he finishes recounting his conversation with Sailor Star Fighter.
Setsuna's hands are clenched tightly together on her lap. "I don't blame her for her actions. The grief she must feel…" she pauses. "This is all my fault." She turns to face Mamoru bowing her head to him. "I'm sorry you have to go through this as well. I wanted to bring the two of you together."
He can only manage a head nod. A small part of him is frustrated at Setsuna for her role in this. But at the same time she was trying to restore his relationship with Usako. He doesn't know how to feel.
Everything is starting to sink in for him. When he first heard the news, all he could think about was coming here to tell everyone. Now that he fulfilled that task his emotions are starting to catch up with him. He stands up abruptly. "I'm going to be going. I still need to find Usako and talk to her. Maybe she's returned to Earth."
No one tries to stop him as he leaves the apartment. He walks to the elevator hitting the down button. Once he is outside the building, he'll search for Usako. He needs to be able to touch the ground. The elevator door opens and the last person he wanted to see is standing there. Seiya.
Seiya doesn't say anything as he gets off the elevator. He barely acknowledges Mamoru with a nod of his head.
Mamoru glares at the long haired man. "How could you let that happen to her?" He retorts at Seiya needing to take his anger out on someone. "I thought you were going to protect her!"
"No one knew she was pregnant! I never would have let her come to Kinmoku if I had known!" His voice lowers as he looks away. "I would do anything to spare her this pain."
Mamoru shakes his head in disgust and gets on the elevator. He hits the button for the first floor then prevents the elevator door from closing. He glares at Seiya as he shares his final thoughts. "Usako would have stayed in the other timeline had she known. She never would have done anything to endanger Chibi Usa." His voice full of contempt, "you're really lucky she didn't know until it was too late." He releases the elevator door and it closes.
Seiya is frozen in place. Mamoru's words hit him like a punch in the gut. It is something he has questioned but was too afraid to ever bring up. Odango had told him she wasn't happy in that timeline. How would her decision have changed if she had known?
He returns to his apartment; trying to keep his emotions in check. A part of him feels responsible. He should have insisted she stayed on Earth. But the premonitions she had on the tour made it sound as if it was meant for her to go to Kinmoku. Why didn't she have premonitions about something like this?
He walks past Yaten and Taiki without saying anything going directly to his room and the door closes behind him.
Yaten sighs. "Great. He's going to be even more moody."
"At least we know he will be on time for the meeting," Taiki barely looks up from his composition book.
Sailor Cosmos remained at the Galaxy Cauldron for a few hours before she felt she was ready to return to Earth. Sailor Galaxia accompanies her back to Earth as she promised Fighter.
"I'll be fine," Usagi tells the golden senshi. "I just need some time to myself."
Sailor Galaxia places a hand on her shoulders. "I understand. If you need anything please do not hesitate to ask. Queen Kakyuu can reach me." She leaves as quickly as she came. With the child's starseed returning she needs to double her efforts to find the starseed belonging to Prince Akio.
It doesn't take long before Usagi finds herself in Ueno Park. The park where Chibi Usa first appeared. She stands on the empty dock; the attendant staring at her strangely after she told him she didn't want to rent a boat and just wanted to stand here for a few minutes. She moves to the end of the dock, remembering how annoyed and shocked she was by the sudden appearance of the little girl during her first date with Mamoru.
Usagi lingers for a little longer before she leaves. It's a long walk from Ueno to Juban. She doesn't want to be so close to so many people by taking the subway. She transforms and teleports to Arisugawa Park. She doesn't want to talk to anyone in the next several hours and hopes they won't look for her there.
Mamoru refuses to leave Japan until Usako returns. He knew she would return to Tokyo sooner or later. The only questions were when and where. He avoided all of his usual places in case someone recognized him. He could never explain how he was here when he is supposed to be in the middle of his semester in Boston.
He stops often to lean against a tree to search for Usako. This ability is becoming easier as he continues to use it. He is familiar with her life force and because it is so strong, it's easy to spot especially when their proximity is close. But it only works if she's on Earth.
His mind is full of so many questions. Why did she keep this from him? So many thoughts are running through him. Chibi Usa could have been born into this timeline. It would have changed everything. His breath catches in his throat. Maybe there is a way to fix this and save Chibi Usa! Galaxia had said her starseed appeared in the Galaxy Cauldron. Maybe that is why Sailor Cosmos has been gone for so long, she's trying to save their little girl.
Mamoru abruptly stops walking. Maybe Usako has tried to save Chibi Usa all along and couldn't. His head is pounding. He leans his hand against a tree again, desperate to find her.
This time he sees her in walking through Arisugawa Park. He concentrates to pinpoint her location. He is going to teleport to her. He doesn't want to risk missing her.
Usagi pauses as she walks past a playground. She remembers times Chibi Usa played at Arisugawa Park. As she walks around she is reminded of so many things from her past. She looks at the water fountain where she met Mamoru several times. He was usually reading a book as he was waiting for her.
She had hoped that finding Chibi Usa's starseed would make her feel better and help her with her grief but it is having the opposite effect. She looks down at her hands, the same ones that held Chibi Usa's starseed close to her chest. Not being able to do anything only made it worse. What kind of Guardian is she if she can't find a way to save her own daughter?
"Usako."
Usagi turns around to see him there. "Mamo…chan…" She responds slowly trying to understand why he is at this park. Why didn't he go back to Boston after the training session ended?
He walks forward to her. He needs to have this conversation with her quietly. "Why didn't you tell me about Chibi Usa?"
Usagi's eyes widen at his statement. Who told him about Chibi Usa? "How…"
"You called out her name before you left the Silver Millennium," He explains to her. "Sailor Star Fighter told me."
Usagi looks away and toward the ground. How could Seiya do this? "I didn't tell you… because it wouldn't change anything."
Mamoru can't believe her response. "What do you mean it won't change anything? Our little girl was nearly born into this world." He continues, "there has to be away to save her. Just like before everyone's starseeds returned."
Usagi continues to look down. She doesn't dare look up at him while she shatters whatever hope he has left. "This is different Mamo-chan… her starseed burned out."
He places his hands on her shoulders forcing her to look up at him. "You used the Ginzuishou to save everyone before. Everyone's starseed burned out the second time we faced Queen Beryl." He can't wrap his mind around how this could be different than all those other times.
Tears fall down Usagi's cheeks. "Too much time passed. I was unconscious for too long and too weak to be able to do anything. By the time I learned what happened…" Her voice is too choked with emotion to say anything else.
Mamoru continues to be in complete denial. "But your abilities as Sailor Cosmos… it allowed you to save-"
"Stop it Mamo-chan!" Usagi yells at him pushing his hands off her shoulders. "I didn't want to tell you because there was nothing I could do to save her! Don't you think I would have tried anything to save her?" Her hands shake as she vents out her frustrations.
Mamoru's demeanor softens when he sees how upset she has become. He hugs her tightly instead. "I'm sorry." He whispers. "I know you would do everything to save her." He continues to hold her close to him. "I don't blame you for what happened. It's no one's fault."
Usagi breaks away shaking her head side to side, "it's all Sailor Pluto's fault! If she never sent me to the other timeline none of this would have happened!" Why can't he see that Setsuna is the one that caused all of her suffering?
Mamoru is less understanding. "You could have stayed in the other timeline and avoided all of this. Things could have been how they were supposed to be."
After all this time, is it still not sinking in for him? "Things will never go back to how they were Mamo-chan. Too much has changed. I've changed a lot!"
He has to ask especially after saying this to Seiya. "If you knew you were pregnant with Chibi Usa, would you have stayed in that timeline?"
She stares at him with her mouth open wide while she scrambles to answer. "Don't ask me something like that." She snaps. "It doesn't matter, that timeline doesn't exist and it never will. Only this one exists." She tried so hard to not cry again but is unsuccessful as the first tears fall. "I didn't want to lose Chibi Usa a second time." Her voice wavers as she takes a few steps away from him.
"You don't have to go through this alone," Mamoru extends his hands out toward her.
Usagi moves further back placing more distance between them. "I am alone in this Mamo-chan. No one can really understand what it feels like."
He tries to offer her what comfort he can as he sees her breaking down. "I understand better than anyone else." He studies her carefully. "Maybe this is a sign of what the future could still be?"
Usagi whips her head back forth in a no motion. "It's not possible. Chibi Usa will not be coming back." She sniffles as she says this. She has exhausted all options she can think of. "I don't have a way to bring her back."
This isn't like her to just give up. "Let me help you figure something out."
He keeps pushing, transforming her feelings to anger. "It will never be the same." She can't handle this anymore and runs off. Hoping he doesn't follow her. If he does she'll teleport and somewhere else far away.
Mamoru is stunned and hurt by her reaction. He had hoped what Seiya told him was somehow wrong about Chibi Usa. Even though he knew the younger man had no reason to lie to him about something like this. He sighs. He doesn't know how to help her.
How can she blame Sailor Pluto? She tried to fix the timeline that went off track. If she had stayed in that timeline none of this would have happened. They would still be happily married and expecting their daughter soon.
There is nothing left for him in Tokyo, he returns to Harvard.
Usagi runs through Juban and toward Minato City. Tears blur her vision. She worked so hard to avoid a confrontation like the one she just had with Mamoru. He said he didn't blame her but she sensed something different when he told her she could have stayed in the other timeline. It didn't matter if she wasn't happy there. Chibi Usa was his main concern; she was only his main concern. Her pace slows a little. Could she have been happy knowing she saved Chibi Usa? Would she have found a way to be happy there even if it meant never seeing Seiya again?
She felt so helpless not being able to save her daughter. Mamoru brought up all of these feelings she was just starting to overcome. She didn't want to be reminded of how horrible it felt. She finally stops running when her lungs feel like they are burning. She ducks into a nearby alley to catch her breath, leaning her back against the building. She focuses on her breathing. She takes deep breathes trying to calm her racing heart.
It doesn't work. Her heart is racing for another reason. What was Seiya thinking telling this to Mamoru? Forcing her to have the conversation she wanted to avoid at all costs. She examines her surroundings and realizes she is already halfway to his apartment building.
She watches the number increase as the elevator ascends. All she can think about is how Seiya never should have told Mamoru what happened. He put her in this position. The elevator doors open and she walks over to the apartment with the name plate of Kou. She knocks loudly, repeatedly.
Seiya is annoyed at whoever this loud visitor is since they have to be leaving in less an hour for a meeting with their manager about a new project. He opens the door prepared to yell at whoever it is for being so obnoxious and questioning the promise of security at this new building. His expression changes in an instant. "Odango?"
"What were you thinking?" She immediately starts yelling at him. "You didn't have the right to tell Mamo-chan what happened!"
He expected this sooner or later and it still aggravates him. "What was I supposed to do? You left saying the little girl's name. Mamoru-san had a lot of questions and he wasn't going to leave without answers." Seiya starts to explain what happened after she abruptly left the training session.
"You shouldn't have been the one to tell him," Usagi voice is growing louder.
He has to ask her. "When were you going to tell him? He was going to find out sooner or later."
Usagi is silent as she looks away. That was never her plan.
Seiya's eyes widen as he realizes what she is thinking. "You were never going to tell him where you?"
It takes Usagi a moment to find her voice again. "Why? After everything that happened he didn't need another loss." Her anger returns. "This is what I wanted to avoid and you made it impossible!"
"What was I supposed to do?" Seiya asks again as he raises his voice frustrated at how everything played out. He had assumed Mamoru knew until he started to turn aggressive wanting answers.
Their loud voices attract their neighbors next door. Haruka opens the door seeing the two of them in the hallway. She looks at Usagi when she asks, "Is everything okay?" She then glares at Seiya to give him a warning to not do anything.
"We're fine," Seiya immediately snaps at the tall blonde. "This has nothing to do with you." He reaches forward to grab Usagi's wrist. "We can finish talking inside."
Usagi can barely manage a nod before she is ushered into the apartment and the door closes behind her.
Haruka is about to go over to the Three Lights apartment but Michiru stops her.
"Let them talk about this. Usagi is clearly upset," Michiru suggests.
Haruka relents on the advice of Michiru and returns to their apartment, closing the door. "So… it is true about Chibi Usa-chan…" She states looking at Michiru and Setsuna. The part of the conversation she heard between Seiya and Usagi confirmed it.
Setsuna gripes the mug in her hands tighter as she nearly dropped it before she can reach a nearby table. How could she have missed this? They were so close to having Small Lady back in this timeline. She questions how the Queen will ever forgive her. She looks at the other two women in the room while she tries to process her thoughts. Maybe this is another reason all of the Outer Senshi are on Earth in the future she had seen. She frowns as another thought occurs to her. Was this event supposed to happen, or will this event change everything she had seen?
They are no longer shouting at each other like they were in the hallway. Seiya took Usagi to the studio room, away from Taiki and Yaten at the other end of the apartment. He didn't want them to hear any more of their conversation.
He explained to her what happened at the Silver Millennium after she left. Sailor Earth was already starting to piece things together and King Endymion was threatening to stalk him until he got what he wanted.
Usagi is frustrated and takes it out on the only person she can at the moment. She says the first thing that comes to her mind. "Maybe I'm not ready to talk to you after all."
Seiya feels like he has been punched in the gut a second time today. "You never told me you were never going to tell Mamoru-san. I assumed you already told him. By the time I realized you hadn't told him, it was too late," he explains his thought process. "I didn't think you'd keep a secret like this from him." He pauses. "But then again it seems like you've been keeping a lot of secrets. From a lot of people," he is clearly hurt by not knowing what is going on in her life anymore.
"Why? What is the point of telling him? To hurt him some more? You don't know how painful it is to lose a child. I wanted to spare him that pain."
Seiya's expression softens as he understands. "I didn't want to cause you pain either. I'm sorry."
Usagi feels overwhelmed by the day's events. "I can't stay here any longer. It's better if I leave for now." She turns to leave without another word.
Seiya sighs. He is moving in the complete opposite direction he wants to be in right now. Somehow he is back to square one. He follows her to door. "Will I see you again soon?" He musters unsure of what else to say or do.
Usagi can't look at him while she answers. "I don't know." She slips out of the door.
Once Usagi leaves, Seiya wordlessly returns to his own room closing the door softly behind him. His legs give out from underneath him and he slides to the floor burying his face in his hands, unsure how they will ever fix their relationship.
Rei collapses on her bed. How did Grandpa think this guy she was forced to meet could even a good match? He expected her to stay home, raise a family and be a housewife! Who does he think he is?
She has too many other commitments and dreams of her own to fulfill! She is not giving them up for anyone! She pauses. She will have to give up some or all of them when the time comes for Usagi to go to the Silver Millennium. But they still have a lot of time before then, don't they?
She forces herself up from her bed to turn on her computer. An email from Mamoru catches her attention. The subject reads, "You knew and didn't tell me." She clicks on the message; her mouth drops as she reads the email from the King of Earth. His tone makes it clear he is angry. He found out about Chibi Usa from Fighter and confronted Usagi. He is furious at Rei for keeping something like this from him. After she finishes reading the message she leans back in her chair.
Her computer pings. Another email. This one is also from Mamoru. She is hesitant to read this one. But this was just sent, the other one is from hours ago. She clicks on it. His tone is very different. He's worried about Usagi and is asking Rei to check on her.
The raven haired woman sighs. She needs to check on Usagi. It's not a good idea for her to be alone right now.
Seiya calls Usagi the next day in the afternoon and was told she wasn't feeling well and was napping by Ikuko. He tells Ikuko he'll call back later in the evening.
Around eight in the evening, he can't wait anymore. He quickly dials the phone number waiting for someone to pick up. It's Usagi's dad. "Hello Kenji-san." It still feels weird to call Usagi's parents by their first names but it is what they told him before leaving on tour.
"Seiya-kun," Kenji starts heading upstairs while talking on the phone. "I think Usagi is in her room. According to the papers the three of you have been really busy and there are rumors of a bunch of future projects."
"Yeah… we're figuring out what is next for us," Seiya keeps the conversation simple as he waits for Usagi to come on the line. He hears Kenji knock on the door.
"Usagi? You have a telephone call," Kenji announces to her.
Usagi's bedroom door slowly opens as she looks at the phone. She is pretty sure she knows who it is. They never finished talking earlier. She reluctantly accepts the phone from her dad, "Thanks."
Usagi closes the door and stares at the phone for a moment. She has been avoiding him so much lately. She thinks of what he wrote in the letter and places the receiver by her ear. "Hello?"
"Hi Odango," Seiya greets her. "I wanted see how you were feeling." He would prefer to see in her person but if she only wants to speak on the phone, he'll take what he can get. "I also wanted to talk to you."
"I didn't think we had anything else to talk about. You told Mamo-chan something you shouldn't have. Something happened on Kinmoku that shouldn't have. There are a lot of things that seemed to happen with you lately that shouldn't have." Usagi sums everything up.
"…" He frowns. "I have a lot of make up to you."
"Well it's not going to be today. I need to rethink things over," Usagi explains to him. "… I know we still need to talk but it's not going to be tonight or for a little while."
Seiya closes his eyes tightly. Angry at how things played out at the Silver Millennium. "Please don't shut me out."
"… I need to figure this out for myself first. I'll call you when I'm ready," Usagi tries to let him down gently. "Everything is still really hard for me."
"You've been brave trying to handle this by yourself but you don't have to," he pleads with her, wanting to help her in anyway. "Please let me help you." He tries to keep it together, afraid he is going to lose her.
"…" Usagi's throat tightens. "I'm sorry… I have to figure this out alone. I'll let you know." Her voice shakes at the end. She quickly hangs up before she starts crying. This shouldn't be so difficult for her. But until she can get past the events of Kinmoku, it needs to be this way.
Usagi eventually dries her eyes and opens her bedroom door to take the phone back downstairs. She places the phone back, unable to express how she is feeling in words. The doorbell rings. She frowns. She doesn't want to get the door but she is standing right there. Who would be coming over this late?
The blonde opens the door in surprise. "Rei-chan…?"
"Usagi, we need to talk about what happened today."
Usagi can barely manage a head nod. "Dad, Rei-chan came over and we're going to be in my room for a bit!" Usagi tries to sounds like her cheerful self at the end but it falls flat.
Kenji appears in the hallway with a magazine. "Oh, you're done talking with Seiya-kun already?"
"Yeah…." Usagi responds looking down at the floor, luckily her back is still facing her father.
Rei can already see Usagi fighting back tears when his name is mentioned. She grabs the blonde's arm lightly, "come on Usagi, let's go upstairs." She wasn't sure all of what is going on but Usagi has kept her issues with Seiya private from her parents.
Usagi nods her head as she leads the way to her bedroom. Without another word she collapses near the chabudai next to bed. She stares at the table in front of her. Not looking up. "Mamo-chan knows about Chibi Usa." She murmurs quietly.
"I know…" Rei responds softly. "He emailed me what happened and asked me to check on you."
Usagi's lip twitches a little. "Because of Chibi Usa… he wants to work things out...again."
Rei watches Usagi carefully not daring to interrupt her.
"He thinks things can go back to how they were… nothing can go back to how it was." Usagi doesn't speak any more and she fights back tears.
Rei is about to ask if things could back to how they were with Mamoru but pauses. If Usagi wanted that to happen, she wouldn't have chosen Seiya more than once. Usagi is upset about Chibi Usa but there is something else Usagi seems to be struggling with more at the moment. One that is easier to fix. She changes her approach. "How did speaking with Seiya-kun go?"
"How could he tell Mamo-chan what happened?" Usagi finally looks at Rei with anger in her eyes.
"From what Mamoru-san told me, Fighter seemed shocked you never told him," Rei continues to explain. "He never knew you were never going to tell Mamoru-san, did he?" Usagi doesn't answer. "How would he know if you've barely talked to him since you came back? It's good that you talked earlier before the training session but… how many things is he in the dark about?
Usagi opens her mouth to protest and stops. There are so many things she hasn't spoken to Seiya about. Or anyone. Most of her premonitions, her conversation with Karin and Galaxia at the Galaxy Cauldron, the insecurities Shiori caused; the list could keep going. Her eyes catch the OSAP bag on her desk behind Rei. The letter. Seiya was trying to make amends.
"It's like the time you were mad at Mamoru-san forgetting your birthday but you never told him it was your birthday," Rei reminds Usagi.
Usagi sighs as her shoulders slump. "If only things turned out different on Kinmoku…" Usagi repeats again.
"But you can't fix the past Usagi, you can only go forward. So what do you want going forward?" Rei questions her. "Do you want to fix things with Seiya-kun?"
Usagi can only look down at her hands when the first tears fall.
"Usagi is in the bath right now but she should be done soon," Ikuko explains to Usagi's guests. "If you want to wait for her upstairs I'll bring up some tea and cakes shortly." She leads the two upstairs before she disappears downstairs to tell Usagi about her guest and make beverages.
Haruka and Michiru stand near the doorway. This is their first time in Usagi's room. One of the first things Haruka notices is the Three Lights poster above Usagi's bed. "Still?"
"Haruka," Michiru chides her as her eyes scan the room. "I don't see any pictures of them together," she tries to assess the situation. She doesn't know how much time they have before Usagi returns from her bath.
Haruka continues to snoop and finds a letter on Usagi's desk. The strange writing catches her attention. She can't read most of it. She is about to move on when she sees the top is written in Japanese. She sees the phrase, "Dearest Odango…" she starts to read out loud. She glares at the words before she moves onto the next line. She tries to suppress a chuckle at calling Luna nosy and stops. She can't read the rest no matter how hard she tries. It's not fair she needs to know what he is telling her. "I can't read the damn thing."
Michiru navigates to other side of her partner to look at the letter. A smile on her lips she comments, "clever to write it Kinmokian."
Haruka scoffs at Michiru's praise of the Three Light's member.
"I'm sure it's very personal and you wouldn't want to be nosy like Luna, right?" Michiru giggles at the change of Haruka's facial expression of anger to embarrassment. She leads the blonde to the table to sit down and wait for Usagi.
Five minutes later, Usagi returns in her pajamas with a towel wrapped around her long blonde hair. She tries to keep her expression neutral. It was only a matter of time until they learned the truth.
"Why didn't you tell us about Chibi Usa-chan?" Haruka snaps in anger.
Michiru shakes her head resting her hand on Haruka's hand to quiet her. "What I think Haruka is trying to say is she is upset we weren't informed about… your loss," Michiru approaches the topic carefully.
"It wouldn't change anything. Chibi Usa…. is gone… and by the time I learned what happened it was too late to save her." Usagi's voice cracks at the end. She sits down on her bed, trying to dry some of her hair. "I don't want anyone to ever feel like they are weighted down by their destiny ever again."
Haruka opens her mouth to protest but Michiru squeezes her hand to silence her. "Have you ever felt like that Usagi?"
Usagi nods her head yes. "It's like I didn't have a choice anymore, it was something I had to do and for the longest time and I thought I was happy so it didn't matter." She pauses pulling the towel off of her hair causing her long hair to cascade down her back. "I can't make my decisions based on a future that doesn't exist." Her heartbeat quickens as she speaks those words imaging the little girl in the garden. She closes her eyes. "But it doesn't really matter anymore. Chibi Usa won't exist in this timeline again…" She can't keep it together anymore, even in front of Haruka and Michiru. She breaks down into tears.
Haruka is the first to reach her and hugs her. "Kitten… we'll figure this out somehow." She looks at Michiru for confirmation.
Michiru can only frown in response before she moves to Usagi's other side to hug her as well. It's clear to the teal haired woman not bringing Setsuna with them was the right choice. Usagi is still in so much pain she tried to hide from everyone.
To fill the void, Seiya throws himself into his music for the rest of the week and is finally able to finish the song he started on the flight home. He's due in the studio tomorrow afternoon to record it.
He sighs looking at a newspaper he saved from Brazil when they announced they were together. He stares at the picture. They looked so happy then… it was before any of their problems started. He would give anything to go back to that time or even change some of his past mistakes.
Usagi finished tying the red obi around her waist. She inspects how her light pink yukata looks in the mirror. After she is happy with her appearance she walks over to the calendar with the date circled in red. July seventh.
Before going to Kinmoku she has assumed she would be with Seiya for this festival but she hasn't spoken to him since their last phone call when she told him she needed some time.
She needed to sort everything out. This morning she came to the conclusion she can't blame Seiya for telling Mamoru. She kept it a secret from him that she wasn't going to tell Mamoru. Seiya was right, how would he have known if she wasn't upfront with him? If she would have told Mamoru from the beginning, their last fight wouldn't have happened. It was her fault. "So much for no more secrets, huh?" She lets out another sigh looking up at the Three Lights poster.
She has replayed the moment in her head over and over again when Sailor Galaxia appeared at the Silver Millennium to inform her of Chibi Usa's starseed appearing at the Galaxy Cauldron.
She tries to push the memory to the side. Tonight she wants to have fun with friends as she has on so many other evenings for festivals. She grabs a pair of pink crystal earring studs and puts them on. Seeing the pink crystals remind her of Seiya's gift.
Opening the dresser drawer, she pulls out the navy blue box with the bracelet. Gingerly she opens the lid to stare at it and the way the light reflects off the diamonds. She hasn't even worn this yet. On impulse she frees it from its case and quickly fastens it to her wrist. Her long yukata sleeves will hide it from the other girls.
The star charm seems so appropriate tonight as it is Tanabata, known as a star festival to celebrate the legend between Orihime and Hikoboshi. The lovers separated by the Milky Way and can only meet one night a year.
She looks at the clock; does she have enough time to call Seiya before meeting with everyone?
Mamoru… the things you said in this chapter that was cold! I was getting mad just writing it!
Did Usagi over react a bit with Seiya for telling Mamoru about Chibi Usa? Usagi needed some time to cool down as well. She can't still be really mad at Seiya, can she if she is wearing his bracelet?
I wonder what the odds are of her seeing Seiya at the festival…
What happens at the festival? Find out on 2/1! Act 82: can also find me on Tumblr where teaser scenes are posted between acts the Saturday before (sorakazeno), on Twitter/X (sorakazeno1) and BlueSky (sorakazeno)
Typos for the win:
Rei collapses on her head.