AU: Jack is home and while same things are good (different), Samantha discovers not everything is roses.
TRIGGERS: Sexual Content. Skip the section between the ~ ~ ~ OoOoOoOoOoOo ~ ~ ~ markers if you do not wish to read this content.
Chapter 42: Good Different
Saturday, 3rd July 2004 – Afternoon – Samantha and Jack's house – Samantha O'Neill
"Mummy! Mummy!" I turned to shield my eyes from the afternoon sun as Grace galloped over behind her kid sized wheelbarrow barely big enough to carry soil for one plant. "Whoa there, boy." She commanded pulling back on the handles as if they were reins. "Where do you want this?" She asked happily. Her exuberance made me smile. Every second thing had been a horse until her birthday. Now, everything was a horse or could be turned into a horse with a little imagination.
"Just here, Munchkin." I replied. When she didn't move and the soil didn't appear, I looked over my shoulder to find her normally cheerful smile drop into a forlorn glower, and I realised that I had used her father's special name. "Oh, I'm sorry sweetheart." I corrected, at the last-minute swaying away from calling her Angel or any other name that Jack had ever called her. Since Sam – or old Mum as Grace called her – left, the light seemed to leave her a little bit each day that he didn't come home. I hadn't had the heart to tell her that I saw him four days ago. I didn't want to get her hopes up because until he was home and safe, the very thought of telling her that her Daddy wasn't coming home literally kept me awake at night.
"Sorry, Mummy. I miss Daddy. He doesn't answer me anymore." She moped, then sniffed and wiped her eye with her fisted hand, leaving a smudge of black dirt on her cheek. In that moment, my heart broke for her. It didn't normally have empathic abilities, but now with my growing baby, I could feel a little of her sorrow seeping into my body.
"When did he stop answering?" I asked as my heart leapt then sank immediately afterwards because I knew she had been using his pilot wings to talk with him every day since she arrived home with John.
She held up her little fist and extended one finger at a time. "One… two… five." She said when the third finger came up.
"That's three, Gracie." I corrected her, then pointed at each finger. "One… two… three." I repeated. Three days. Did that mean he was awake? I closed my eyes because the other option didn't bare thinking about. Unfortunately, my memories didn't get the memo, instantly recalling the sound of Jack hitting the wall along with the smell of cordite and acrid taste that went with the combination of black powder and death in the air and me powerless to save him because he was a hologram. I loved how my brain amalgamated both my Jack's together to create a different level of torrent for me.
"Yes, three." She agreed. "Wait! No. I dreamed with him and Charlie the sleep after tindy." She suddenly informed me.
"You had kindy on Thursday. So that…"
"Two days!" She said as one little finger retracted. "Like our name has two ells, its two days." She said proudly holding her two little fingers up wriggly them back and forth.
"Yes, our name does have two ells." I agreed and smiled because she had returned to her happy little self by focusing on something other than my misstep of calling her Munchkin.
"Daddy says that the one ell Colonel isn't very fun. Do I know the one ell Colonel, Mummy?" She asked as she pushed her wheelbarrow over and emptied half the dirt into the hole that I had dug, the other half going onto the paved path next to the garden bed.
"Actually, I think he is your Daddy. When he was reactivated after Charlie died, his original name badge had only one ell, or so Uncle Daniel tells me. I didn't know him then, but Uncle Charlie says he was tough and mean and didn't laugh or tell jokes." I explained the story I had heard from Charlie in the very early days.
"Nope!" She replied with two sharp shakes of her head. "My Daddy has always been funny, he just forgot how after Charlie went to the golden place." I just smiled at her insistence, though she was probably right. My Jack had reconciled with Sara not long after we started dating. Her first comment was that he had found his funny bone again when he cracked a joke about something innocuous.
"Anyway, after their first mission, I remember him making a song and dance about his name tag being wrong and not having Colonel anywhere on his uniform." I reminisced, realising that the infectious smile he gave me after that little display had been the first time my stomach flipped.
The sound of a car door opening had me turning to see who it was, the initial thought that I was hallucinating was a brief consideration as the image of my husband unfolded himself from the passenger's seat of the silver-grey sedan that I knew belonged to Daniel.
"Jack?" I said as I came to my feet awkwardly and dusted off my knees. When he smiled at me, he looked a little brighter for a few moments almost as if someone turned a light on behind him before turning the dimmer switch down low.
"Sam." He said then held his arms out while walking towards me.
"Daddy!" Grace screamed and ran toward his wide-open arms while I walked steadily mindful of my changing centre of balance. By the time I had reached them, Jack had dropped to his knees and had Grace wrapped in the biggest bear hug while she giggled and cried out her happiness, a soft glow emanating from both of them.
"God, I missed you, my Angel." Jack said, then kissed her hair and looked up at me, "I missed both my angels." He corrected, then stood up and pulled me into his arms, his face burying itself into my neck as he took several deep breathes as if he were grounding himself. The moment he touched me, all my reservations that he wasn't real disappeared as every single nerve-ending lit up and sang that Jack was home. The feeling was so surreal that I gripped onto him as tears of sadness, happiness, fear and anguish fell down my cheeks and the sobs choked my throat rendering me unable to tell him how much I missed him.
"You feel different." He said then pulled away from me wearing a furrowed expression, though I did note that his hands were moving up and down my back, then around to my sides and eventually up to the shoulders. "Good, different." He added a little breathlessly and I wondered if he felt my presence the way I felt his – like a popping zing under my skin that begged him to continue his tactile exploration.
"You don't remember?" I queried, a moment of hurt ricocheting through my heart. How could he not remember, then I recalled the first download and how everything that happened to him the moment his head was stuck had been lost, I felt a little better.
"Remember what?" He asked with worry lines creasing his face, though his hands had returned to my back and were moving, tracing the contours of my clothed body as if he were mapping it out for a later expedition. When I moved his hands around and placed them on my small bump, a sharp pulse of tingles shot through me from his fingers prompting him to look down. The smile that grew on his face was beautiful, all dimples and happy shining eyes.
"We're pregnant. Is it… the clinic… I remember… the clinic." He said with a firm nod, then leaned in to whisper almost conspiratorially, "Did we really have sex there?"
"Yes, just like I promised…" I replied, "…and not physically, no… but mentally…" I nodded earning myself a wide smile before he dropped to his knees, lifted my shirt and placed his hands then his lips on my stomach which dead set made my eyes feel like they were going to roll into the back of my head. So much so, that my hand found his hair as a small groan left my mouth.
"Oh yeah, different. Good different." He muttered as he peppered kisses along the taut skin. "I can't explain it, but I just have to touch you." He murmured as deep and laboured breaths left his mouth. I knew exactly what he meant. I had felt the same with John. Actually that wasn't quite true. John had been one thing, but Jack… God the feeling was easily two-fold to the point where I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to stop touching him.
The thought of John had me looking up to see the young man sitting in the back of Daniel's car leaning his forehead on the glass with a look of pure forlorn anguish on his face. When I reached out with my feelings, I felt the dark cloud that had settled over him as his eyes found mine briefly then turned away.
"Jack. Where's Sam?" I asked because surely, she would be here if John were here. Jack looked up from his place on his knees as some of the glowing aura changed from bright and airy to dark and sullen, almost stifling the air around us. With slow measured movements, Jack came back to his feet and gave John a fleeting glance before looking back at me.
"She didn't… she's…" When Gracie began crying inconsolably, I knew. I felt her pain and Jack's like a thick cloud of sorrow. I immediately stooped to pick up our little girl. She began shaking, her small fingers curling in my shirt.
"Oh, my… No." I interrupted, because she couldn't be dead. She just couldn't be. Squeezing my eyes closed, I folded Grace into my arms as Jack continued to hold us.
"Yeah. Thor's trying but… here, I'll show you." He said, then bowed his head until it met mine. "Close your eyes." He instructed.
The moment I did, my mind was awash in his memories from the moment he woke up to discover that Sam had been taken, a fight on board Thor's ship as they chased the Replicators through hyperspace, beaming down to the planet and finding Sam in agony from whatever they had done to her. I winced and tried to pull away when I saw her changing and saying good bye, but Jack held me tight refusing to let me go. I could feel and hear him crying in my mind as he shared the memories. I felt his love and his regret. When Thor beamed her to the ship, I felt his pain and saw the fine silver dust, John's grief and his anger, the inevitable fight between the two of them, then Jack finding John trying to fix it all, and the zat shot that put a stop to his plans. Finally Jack showed me a girl with blonde hair. It was me. A young me. In a pod, and suddenly I knew – almost inherently – what he was trying to do, as if he put the thought into my mind. When he released me, I swayed a little until he steadied me.
"Oh my God!" I said, covering my mouth.
"Ah, Jack." Daniel says. "You might wanna…" He suggested with a gesture towards the house. That was when I realised that we were both shrouded in golden light. "You have a… little aura going." Daniel gestured to us both with his pointer finger in a circular motion.
"Right." Jack replied with a tight smile, then focused on receding the light. "That's gonna take some practice."
"You're welcome." Daniel replied pre-emptively then thumbed over his shoulder, "I'm gonna get the other you home."
"Thanks, Space Monkey." Jack said then waved.
"Any time, Jack." Daniel said before climbing into the driver's seat.
"Will John be OK?" I asked, already knowing the answer but needing to ask it regardless.
"Eventually. If it works." He responded, then transferred Gracie onto his hip and strung his arm across my shoulders. Out of pure need to keep skin to skin contact with him, I folded my arm and laced my fingers with his hand that was draped over my shoulder as we walked inside leaving the potted plants and messy garden path for tomorrow.
~ ~ S 💕 J ~ ~
Sunday, 4rd July 2004 – Morning – Samantha and Jack's house – Samantha O'Neill
It wasn't the soft breeze coming through the window or even the bird song that woke me up. No. It was the warm calloused hand of my husband stroking my baby bump while I laid on my back as the pre-dawn filtered light rippled through the lace curtains. Turning my head slightly, I found the deep-set golden coffee brown irises and ruggedly handsome face framed by lush salt and pepper tufts of messy hair of the man I loved with my whole heart gazing back at me. Not even the diminished light could diffuse the beauty of his eyes.
"Hey, you."
"Hey, you back." I replied, then reached out to run my hand through his hair watching as he closed his eyes and breathed deep at the sensation with a humming sound that spoke to the very depths of my soul.
"I missed you. I don't remember leaving, but I remember missing you." He whispered lightly then turned his head to kiss the palm of my hand as it travelled to his face to immerse itself in the gravelly feel of his unshaven skin.
"I can barely believe you're here." I responded because truly after the hologram, the innate fear that when I ran to him yesterday, I would pass through him still sat low in my belly. Running my hand back over his temple and through his hair, I had the sudden need to feel his weight on me knowing that it would dispel the last of my fears that this was a dream and that he was still locked away deep under the ice or on some spacecraft rather than here with me.
Wrapping my hand across the back of his neck, I pulled gently until his lips contacted mine then with my other hand and a shuffling tug, I prepared to feel the heaviness of him… but it didn't come, and his lips left mine leaving behind an empty pit of sorrow at the sudden thought that maybe this had been a dream after all.
"I'm too heavy, I don't want to hurt you or our baby." He responded, then kissed along my jaw line while his hand found my stomach again.
"You won't. I promise. Jack… please?" I begged so pathetically that I wondered for a moment if it was even my voice.
"Sam, about last night…" He began, the words falling away as his eyes found mine again.
"Hey, it's OK. It's been four months Jack. You're allowed to be selfish." I replied quickly hoping that my reassurances that his performance – while less than stellar – was wonderful, nonetheless. Truly, it didn't matter that he left me unfulfilled because I'd lost count how many times that he had so effortlessly made me come apart at the seams every other time we had been together.
"Did you… we… err… I have flashes…" He took a deep breath and blew it out slowly, "…flashes of a memory that I can't place. Did we, umm… share?" He asked with an expression so furrowed and so concerned that I almost lost my restraint and giggled.
Instead, I grinned broadly. "Oh yeah." My reply sounding as libidinous as I was feeling because last night had been about him and him alone once Grace was safely in her bed and the door closed. In fact, I had a whole new appreciation for the humble bathroom first with John and then Jack. I still couldn't believe that he was home and real. I wanted him to touch me everywhere and with every part of himself. I wanted what he was having trouble remembering but I knew that wasn't possible. Not now. Not after John had lost his Sam.
"Right. Was it good?" He asked circumspectly, the furrow still there but much less pronounced.
"Was it good?" I repeated with raised eyebrows, "Jack… I had two of you together at the same time." I explained as succinctly as I could, hoping that the expression on my face – because I was reminiscing right at this moment – convinced him just how wonderful it had been. Still, he didn't look sure despite his own raised eyebrows as the revelation hit him. "It was amazing."
"Amazing." He repeated, then slowly the smile crept onto his face as his eyes travelled from my face down my body to my bare breasts and further. Then, the part of this morning I was waiting for began as he kissed his way south finding every sensitive zone along the way until he settled his shoulders between my wide spread thighs, his eyes finding mine over the top of my pronounced bump while his warm breath cascaded over my nether. When the tip of his tongue found my sensitive flesh, I jolted and moaned loudly. "Shhh… don't wake Grace." He murmured then returned to his self-appointed task.
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When I arched my back and cried out on the next pass of his tongue along my sensitive flesh and over my aching clit, he shushed me again, only this time with his face buried sending frissons of thrilling sensation climbing up my back before groaning out his own enjoyment, his hands gripping my hips firmly in place just before the length of his tongue pushed its way inside while the immediate area around him emanated a soft golden glow that grew brighter as his pace escalated until it could only be described as wonderfully punishing.
"Holy f-f-Jack… God, I missed you." I whisper cried urgently while trying to lift my hips up to get closer when he withdrew his tongue. "I need you… please God… I need you." The latter sounding a lot more desperate than I had planned.
Before long, I had abandoned my attempts at keeping quiet. It was as if he were sending miniscule electrical pulses into my body with each touch from either his hands, his tongue or his nose. He seemed to be equally lost in his quest and a golden fog similar to what he had somehow enveloped Sam in that night so long ago slowly filled the immediate area. Just as I reached the precipice marked by extreme sensitivity and a warm tingly – almost flammable – feeling that somehow reminded me of popping candy in my mouth, only on my… a loud shuddering moan left my mouth, then his lips wrapped themselves around my bundle, and applied a sucking motion while he mercilessly flicked the tip of his tongue rapid fire until everything ignited.
"OhGodOhGodOhGod…" I cried, "Yes…" and then a choked-up cursing cry moan escaped, and everything turned white as a powerful jolt of extreme pleasure skittered in every direction.
"Bed head. Now." He growled moments before his lips crashed down on mine, his hands coaxing me up onto my knees and around to hold on. "Shuffle forward." He muttered.
At this point in time, I didn't care that he was ordering me around. I just wanted him, needed him to fill me. As I shuffled forwards with his assistance, because I was still reeling from the magnitude eleven orgasm he had pulled out of me, I rested my arms across the top of the bed head while his arms wrapped around my body – one across my chest to cup my breast and the other cradling the lower curve of my baby belly – and his perfectly aligned member slid up and inside. "Oh, yeah…" he groaned out while holding himself still, his lips and tongue trailing along my shoulder. My eyes slipped closed of their own accord. After a moment to ground himself in the now, he began to move slow and deep, steadily increasing his pace with each pass.
"Come again for me, baby." He murmured in my neck. "I want to feel you come on me." The second request coming just as the hand that cradled my stomach star-fished, his two pointer fingers finding my pulsing bud and lightly pressing then withdrawing with a light zapping sensation that threatened to tip me over into extreme bliss a second time.
"Oh God, Jack. What are you… haa-huuuh…" I think I demanded more but found I couldn't focus on anything except his fingers as they warmed, and the electrical tingle returned while his other hand massaged and pinched my nipple injecting the same sensations. When I finally opened my eyes, everything was golden and misty and tingly and, and, and so damn wonderful. The air held a static charge that caressed my skin. His lips created contrails of goose bumps along my neck, and over my chest culminating in my nipples. His warm breath and the soundtrack that accompanied it heated my blood to a boil. When his arms tightened around me, I knew he was reaching the end of his line. The press and withdraw stopped, his fingers hovering above and an entirely new sensation of ice-cold heat along with vibrating waves of… something I couldn't name.
"Oh, Geezus…" I cried as my breathing pitched and my head fell back onto his shoulder, his cock moving fluidly at an incredible speed. "Oh, baby… yes… yes…" My breath caught as a silent scream echoed in my head and Jack drove home one more time, his teeth sinking into the meaty part of my shoulder as we both combusted before the golden aura vanished and he fell to the side much like he had the night that he – we – healed Sam.
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"Jack!" I called out, worry etched in my voice as his eyes drooped. At length, his hands reached and pulled me down to him so he could wrap his arms around me, hands on my stomach.
"Love you. Sleep." He muttered, moments later his soft snores filled my ears, and I felt my own eyes droop when a strange bout of fatigue I had never remembered feeling before overcame every instinct that said I should get up and start my day. Was it the Ancient thing? Is that why everything about both Jack and John seemed so much more than it had been. Was that why… why… w… the question in my mind petered away as the calming pull of sleep settled over me like a blanket and my eyes slipped closed.