Disclaimer: Stan Shunpike belongs to JK Rowling.

A/N: This chapter didn't work out as well as I'd like. I wrote part of it ages ago, and I didn't realize until it was too late that it was written with the intent that Madam Bones would be there, so I had to improvise. That should be less of an issue in later chapters.

Chapter 3: Snape

The Knight Bus

The reading continued. "It's your turn, Severus," Minerva said, handing the book to her Deputy.

"If I must," Severus grumbled. He examined the chapter title. "Hm, The Knight Bus," he said. "Not the worst decision he could have made…"

It took Harry several blocks of running before he realised he had nowhere to go in either the muggle or the magical world—not with Ron and Hermione abroad. ("Sorry, Harry," Hermione said.) And he had no owl to contact anyone, no money, and (he believed) he might already be on the run from the law for doing magic outside of school.

"He looked down at his wand, which he was still clutching in his hand. If he was already expelled (his heart was now thumping painfully fast), a bit more magic couldn't hurt. It seems I spoke too soon. Typical Potter, digging himself in deeper," Snape said.

"It's hardly his fault that the Ministry scared him into thinking he'd been expelled, Severus," McGonagall said. "No offence to our new professors, of course."

"It's also not our responsibility to ensure he knows every detail of Ministry policy," Snape replied. "Ignorance of the law is no excuse. Isn't that right, Professor Shacklebolt?"

Kingsley raised an eyebrow and turned towards Snape with a somewhat amused expression. "Yes, that is right, Professor Snape," he said, "although I don't think I've ever heard that maxim invoked over the law being more lenient than the perpetrator believed. And besides, the law itself calls for leniency with regard to children. So long as Mr Potter did not intentionally harm anyone or violate the Statute of Secrecy, we could have calmed him down and left his punishment up to the school."

"Hey, just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you, Shack," Tonks spoke up. "I mean, look how the kid's been treated."

Kingsley sighed. "Yes, I suppose, so. Perhaps the initial letter and Minister Fudge's treatment of Hagrid were a little too effective at 'scaring him straight.' We don't send letters for accidental magic, of course, and we should had a note about the house elf in his file as well."

"So he should have been clear with the Ministry, at least," she said. "That just leaves the school. Come to think of it, what are the actual criteria for expulsion, Headmistress? I probably ought to know that if I'm supposed to be the responsible one now."

"With your record, you ought to have known that when you were a student," Sprout cut in. Several of Tonks's former teachers and many of the students laughed.

"Strictly speaking, there are none, Professor Tonks," Dumbledore spoke up. "It is up to the Board of Governors on a case-by-case basis. One incident that is sufficiently severe, such as would see the student arrested, could be enough, while multiple small charms performed in the muggle world in the privacy of one's home may be met with only detentions."

"Professor Dumbledore!" McGonagall exclaimed. "You don't need to give the students any ideas."

"Eh, I think the usual suspects know the score already on that part," Tonks said.

"Ahem," Snape cut in irritably. "If we can continue…"

Harry ultimately did resort to a Wand-Lighting Charm briefly before he was distracted by a dark shape that they now knew was Sirius (probably tipped off by him doing magic). Harry tripped in surprise and, quite by accident, summoned the Knight Bus to him.

Hermione made a note there: How/Why can you summon the Knight Bus when you don't know it exists? Shouldn't it be intent?

A very confused Harry was soon ushered onto the Knight Bus by Stan Shunpike, who wasn't exactly helping matters, himself.

"'What were you doin' down there?' said Stan, dropping his professional manner.

"'Fell over,' said Harry.

"'Choo fall over for?' sniggered Stan." People laughed as much at Snape's incongruous deadpan delivery as the story itself.

Harry did figure out just in time that his scar made him easily identifiable, so he covered it with his bangs and gave Neville's name, prompting a surprised look from the actual Neville.

"Harry rummaged once more in his trunk, extracted his money bag, and shoved some gold into Stan's hand."

"Why did you pay in gold if the fare was less than a galleon?" Hermione asked.

"I was a little preoccupied with not getting caught, Hermione," Harry hissed.

But the bus ride was informative for Harry (conveniently so, in Hermione's opinion) because he was able to read a news article about Sirius Black. It rankled Harry, hearing the official story of Sirius as a murderous traitor repeated again, but he held his tongue, waiting for the book to reveal everything.

"'Fudge has been criticised by some members of the International Confederation of Wizards for informing the Muggle Prime Minister of the crisis.'" Snape read from the article.

"That's odd," Hermione said. "Isn't it his job to keep the muggle government informed?"

"Yeah, but the ICW is even more paranoid about secrecy than the Ministry," Ron replied.

Although there was one odd detail that Harry noticed in the story that he had forgotten. According to Stan, Sirius apparently thought he would take over the Death Eaters after Voldemort was killed—that he was supposed to be high up in the Death Eaters or so people said. But he was also supposed to be a traitor. He must have been publicly seen fighting against the Death Eaters with the Order…or at least Harry thought so. He'd never really asked, he realised. His parents certain had been, though.

But the point was, that didn't sound like much like a high-ranking Death Eater to him. It sounded more like a spy—which after all was exactly what Wormtail had been. One more point that didn't fit, he thought. He wondered, just how plausible—or implausible—was the original official story?

But in the meantime, the Harry in the book was much more preoccupied with his immediate problems, thinking he was in trouble with the law himself.

"He, Harry, had broken wizard law, just like Sirius Black. Was inflating Aunt Marge bad enough to land him in Azkaban?" Snape chuckled disdainfully. "That may be the most teenaged thing Potter has ever said, and that's against some stiff competition."

"Well, it's the same problem, isn't it?" Tonks said. "They made it sound like what happened was worse than it was. Plus, he was raised muggle, so he didn't know how it worked."

"Nevertheless, comparing himself with a mass murderer…" Snape said, but he trailed off, remembering the reasons why Harry might be inclined to make such a comparison beyond mere ignorance. Ultimately, he resumed reading.

In the story, Harry did make it to London on the Knight Bus, only to intercepted immediately (and outed to Stan) by Minister Fudge. If anything, it was surprising now to see Fudge both acting competent and doing what Harry could now grudgingly admit was the right thing. He was pretty clearly telegraphing that he was trying to protect Harry from Sirius Black without telling him directly. It was such a distinct change from any the antics Harry saw from the man before or after that it was hard to believe.

Well, except for one point. Fudge assured the Harry in the book that the issue of Aunt Marge had been handled, and his relatives were willing to take him back the following summer, but not the mid-term holidays. Harry, naturally, did not take this well.

"'I always stay at Hogwarts for Christmas and Easter holidays,' he said, 'and I don't ever want to go back to Privet Drive.'

"'Now, now, I'm sure you'll feel differently once you've calmed down,' said Fudge in a worried tone. 'They are you're family after all, and I'm sure you are fond of each other—er—very deep down.'"

The real Harry groaned and rubbed his forehead. "See what I deal with?" he asked his housemates.

However, in the story, it was Fudge's suggestion that he spend the last three weeks of summer at the Leaky Cauldron that finally pushed him over the edge.

"'Hang on,' blurted Harry. 'What about my punishment?'"

Fred and George gasped in shock, along with half the school. "Harry! Have we taught you nothing?" Fred demanded.

"You should've been in Hufflepuff if you're playing honesty there," George agreed.

"'Last year, I got an official warning just because a house-elf smashed a pudding in my uncle's house!' he told Fudge, frowning. 'The Ministry of Magic said I'd be expelled from Hogwarts if there was any more magic there!'" Snape shook his head: 'And that may be the most boneheaded, foolish thing Potter has ever said—as much as I would like to see him expelled for…certain things. I certainly wouldn't tolerate such breathtaking lack of forethought from any of my students, Headmistress."

McGonagall turned pink. "Well," she said, "I believe Mr. Potter had just suffered several serious shocks that day and was still trying to process them. I shouldn't be that surprised to hear such an outburst from a lad who was at his wit's end."

At the Gryffindor Table, Harry responded to the continued stares of his friends (especially Fred and George) with a shrug. That had been a dumb thing to say, but looking back, he had been fed up with the double-standard he kept seeing, even if he didn't quite understand it yet.

Regardless, Snape quickly wrapped up the chapter. Harry tried to ask Fudge to sign his Hogsmeade permission slip since his deal with Uncle Vernon obviously fell through, but that failed.

"Hah. Nice try, Harry," Tonks called to him from the High Table. "Heck, it might've worked if Fudge wanted on your good side."

"Alas, it appears that the Minister thought it would be safer if Mr. Potter did not go that year," Professor Flitwick spoke up. "And with good reason, for all anyone knew."

"Not that Potter paid attention to such things that year," Snape grumbled.

"And, I might add," McGonagall cut in, looking out sharply at the students, "the Minister's signature would not have been accepted in lieu of a legally appointed guardian. At least, not without a special waiver with regard to custody or, Merlin forbid, one of those ridiculous Educational Decrees."

"That makes sense," Hermione agreed. "I know they're supposed to follow those sorts of rules."

Finally, Snape read how Hedwig had arrived to the Leaky Cauldron only minutes after Harry, and he was all too eager to pass the book along as the chapter ended. However, on hearing that, though, Hermione got a funny look on her face and jotted some arithmancy figures in the corner of her parchment, ciphering with times and distances. Finally, she wrote down a note: How did Hedwig know Harry needed help before he did?