Apologies for the delay... I guess, I'll be updating every other week. I hope you are enjoying the story.
As usual, I own nothing in the CM & Nolanverse worlds.
Reid, Emily, Penelope, Derek and Hotch rode to the penthouse floor. The silence was deafening—you could hear each screech and pull of the elevator's levers.
"Did you know that the first elevator created was an express? In 273 BC, Roman architect, Vitruvius created it—single destination." Reid shared – hoping to squelch the awkward air in the metal room.
Ding.
"And here we are," Bruce said guiding them through the space.
The apartment was stark, airy, bright, and modern—slightly clinical. The furniture seemed like it was pulled from a Design Within Reach showroom-Steel and black leather chairs, sofas, and lounges paired with dark wood tables from Swedish designers with too much time on their hands.
Floor to ceiling windows… a priceless view of the city—priceless, if the wings of the Eurocopter EC 175 didn't bother you too much. Compared to Penelope's apartment -this was the anti-Penelope and Hotch could not see how their worlds merged. How did they work? He wondered.
Hotch corrected himself, any profiler could see they shared something - the way she refused to look at him coupled with the lingering glances he stole when he thought no one was looking, made Hotch wonder the cause of their separation.
She bit her bottom lip right side, which meant that she was anxious, nervous, and/ or hungry. Her tells where obvious because she had no reason to hide her feelings. When she tried to hide her feelings she began to sputter as if her brain could not permit deception of any kind. Hotch enjoyed working with her because she was so transparent - he worked less when she was in the room because no profiling was necessary. But with Bruce here - a past relationship that she hide and then downplayed - he and the team had to do something they've never done before... profile her. He wondered how this would affect the team... especially Derek.
"Alfred's apartment is through here." Bruce said leading them up the stairs.
He reached out to touched Penelope's arm, "A minute?"
The team filtered into Alfred's apartment, as his hand slid from her elbow to her hand. He guided three steps away from the landing.
She knew what was coming, an explanation. She had a meltdown and threw a bunch of mean words and truths at him. Her brain just couldn't comprehend all that had happened in the past 4 hours and what will happen.
He wasn't dead.
That's all that mattered, she reminded herself.
She was just happy to be in a world where they could share air… sometimes.
"I just want to explain why," he said as Emily entered Alfred's apartment.
Why were the still holding hands, she chastised herself as she released him, "Bruce, I don't want to know."
She looked up at him and said, "I need to focus on Alfred."
"I've been trying to find the right time—"
She shook her head and said "No," quietly.
"This is hard enough as it is. Doing my job? Alfred? Jack? I can't add you to the list too."
"I always come last with you, Lulu?" he said looking above her head containing his frustration.
"Don't you even," she said with a new sense of strength and anger.
"For the next few days we have to play the happy couple. I'm a person up on the crime board and people are going to pick through my life to fix yours so forgive me for not wanting to clutter my brain with the selfish ramblings of Bruce Wayne."
He glared at her, "I'm not selfish!" he growled out, "If you would just listen."
She shook her head as tears formed in her eyes, "See, I can't do both. I can pretend to be this Penelope who loves you in this world we used to share. But I can't" she began but couldn't finish, knowing you didn't love me enough.
"I can't know the details and pretend."
She finally met his eyes, "I can't know how the book ends and then pretend to not know the maid did it. So when the case is over if you want to talk." She shrugged, "We can."
"But knowing the why will only distract me and cause me to think of more questions when I need to focus on Alfred and helping the team catch this unsub."
She took his hand as she saw the defeated look in his face, "we will get him, Bruce."
"I don't want you thinking that I abandoned you. That I," he continued as his thumb stroked her palm.
She took her hand back, "I don't think it," she said, "I know it."
"I know it and it's fine," she said nonchalantly.
He began to protest, argue, make her see things his way when she continued.
"We are our choices," she said simply, "they define who we are. We can't explain them away when they no longer suit us."
Those words she chose reminded him of words spoke by another. Rachel told him something similar as he stood in front of his new hotel soaking wet with two models. Penelope's footsteps brought him back to reality.
She started up the stairs, "They're waiting for us."
They walked up the short staircase together and the feeling of the space changed.
The apartment was warm and orderly. On Alfred's desk he had pictures—one of him and his mom … Alfred looked about 12; another with his peace core buddies; a picture of the Waynes and baby Bruce; Alfred and Bruce at 15 in front of the mansion. Next were pictures of Penelope and Bruce… photo-booth pictures from a baseball game and tickets; Penelope, Holly, and Bruce wearing berets and fake mustaches; and a wedding picture—Bruce sweeping Penelope's hair out of her face as they stand before the officiant.
Bruce watched as Derek picked up their wedding picture and looked closely. He didn't know Alfred had a picture of that day.
"How long were you married before the dock explosion?" Derek asked
"3 and a half years."
Derek repeated the answer to himself—before moving to the next question.
"Did he have family?"
"No," Bruce said quickly, "Well yes, Leslie. She's my doctor. They've been together for a few years now and me."
Bruce showed Derek her picture—tucked by his nightstand.
"He didn't have family outside of us," Bruce added.
Bruce turned to the rest of the team, Emily, Reid, Hotch, and Penelope.
"Above us is the kitchen and dining area and then my flat."
Hotch stayed with Derek, as Reid, Emily, and Penelope headed up stairs.
As they walked up the stairs to the uber modern kitchen—Emily says, "I just can't imagine you living here."
"We only lived here for like 3 or 4 months—we lived in Paris most of the time. I was a computer science teacher and I did a bunch of community outreach with a dash of consulting."
The apartment seemed too posh even for Penelope, "We lived upstairs though—" she said trying to explain this life to her friends and co-workers.
As they made their way up to the final apartment, the feeling and mood changed – a total 180. And Emily understood why he didn't live here anymore—it felt like Garcia.
The mantel was filled with pictures of them.
"Nothing has changed," Penelope, said completely surprised.
The furniture was homey and classic at the same time—the colors were muted which seemed like a Bruce thing, Emily thought, but the accessories were loud, vibrant, and filled with mementos of love.
"Paris?" Emily asked as she pointed to the wall with a painted Eiffel Tower. The edges of the tower were surround by cutouts on pink and purple construction paper.
"That was our Paris vision board. Y'know like our reminder to go back home. When we first returned to San Fran we were mentally apart and in different places. I was working with Charlie and Bruce was traveling a bunch… fixing Wayne Enterprise- this kind of reminded us that this was just a blip. On the blip recording machine—why can't I remember what that is?"
"Sonar machine?" Reid asked absentmindedly.
"Thank you, boy wonder!"
"Uhm, what do you mean we were supposed to go back once everything settled down."
"What brought you both back?" Reid asked
"Bruce had Wayne Enterprise stuff to do and then I discovered Holly was missing."
Then she rephrased it, "Holly was missing and then the Wayne Crisis."
When Bruce entered the room Penelope exited. He watched Derek follow Penelope and couldn't control the pain he was feeling.
Reid asked, "You like faking your death why?"
"I like to be out of the public eye – and I was injured."
"What kind of injuries?" Reid asked stepping closer to him.
"I severely damaged my spine which lead to brain injuries—I had temporary Tetraplegia as a result from—"
"The surgery to correct white cord syndrome?" Reid said completing his thought.
"Yes, I," he looked up but Penelope was already gone, "had complications."
"The chances of recovering from that are 2.5%," Reid said surprised that he made it
"But the chances of actually having lesions to cause the syndrome are .0125 % about 60 cases world wide a year. Approximately 4 in America a year," Bruce finished prattling off the stats.
Reid looked up impressed and Emily smiled, "don't tell me you're a genius with a didactic memory."
Bruce smiled to himself, "I know a few things." His smile transitioned to concern, "Please don't tell Penelope—I tried to tell her but she wants to wait until we get Alfred back—she gets very rulesy when…"
"When she's not in control," Emily finished knowing Penelope's profile.
He thought of all the times Alfred encouraged him to use his full potential ... to live at his full potential... He couldn't get through something like this without Alfred – Penelope used to say that was his person… they both were his people and in essence they were both gone—one of them physically.
"We will find him," Emily said patting his shoulder.
"He is a father to me—I never told him but he is and I should've told him," he said watching Penelope return to the room, "should've said it."
Penelope returned to the room with Derek in tow, "I'm going to run around the corner and grab a few things since I came here go-bag-less. I'll meet you back at base camp - in 20 minutes."
Hotch nodded.
"You're clothes are still in our closet," he said
She was surprised, she tilted her head to ask something but nothing came to mind.
"Alfred once said your shoe collection was like photographs of your life. With us, with Holly," He smiled at her, "Precious and irreplaceable," she smiled at the memories of her shopping with Holly.
Her smile turned to a glare, he could save my shoes but you couldn't pick up the phone, she though.
Argghh, she growled on the inside, as she repeated… relax, relate, release… a saying Fran told her about over the holidays when she burnt the Christmas cookies.
Derek followed her upstairs while Hotch waited for her to be out of earshot.
"Why didn't you tell her you were alive when you could?"
"She was happy and I was, I mean she is happy - she is happy right?"
"Yes," Hotch said plainly.
"Alfred wanted to – he wanted me to tell her - it was the cause of our biggest argument because he kept in touch with her. Alfred always felt like he was lying to her and by not telling her the truth."
Bruce realized that Hotch wasn't privy to the conversation he had with Reid.
"I was in a coma, for 18 months, then paralyzed in a chair for another 18-24 months. When I could travel she was happy and I could not..." Bruce realized he was about to share too much to a room full of strangers.
"We had an unconventional relationship," he said trying to put on his Billionaire Bruce cape.
"Would Alfred himself have any enemies or I mean did anyone not like him?"
Reid asked understanding the sacrifice Bruce was trying not to say he made. The sadness in Bruce's eyes reminded Reid of himself.
Maeve, he thought. As he looked off into the distance.
"Would Alfred himself have any enemies or I mean did anyone not like him?"
"No he was firm but loving. He managed a huge staff for parties and such but he was always direct never – no, he didn't have any enemies."
Meanwhile upstairs,
She walked into the closet—the clothes bring back memories—Alfred was so right. She looked at the green dress she wore to the midsummer's night party—and the yellow gown she wore to the first CES—how did he get the stains out. Oh shit she thought her Minnie Mouse Pencil pants—Holly sent her these from Brown—she found them at vintage store.
"How are you holding up?" Derek asked
"Hmm?"
"You can't fool me baby girl," he said turning her, "We're in you life picking it apart. Heck there are some things I didn't even know."
She looked down at her nails and frowned at them, she knew she hurt Derek by keeping secrets but … he raised her chin to meet his eyes, and he smiled, "You the original commitment-phobe—married," he said poking her side.
"D, it wasn't real. I mean how could it be?"
"You have to feel something? In addition to shock?"
"I stopped feeling in regards to Bruce a while ago." She tried to believe her lie, "I'm good," she said looking at her clothes.
"You don't have to go all tough girl on me," Derek assured her.
"My amber-flower—Don't you worry. I'm not in shock—exposed yes? Like the episode of Seinfeld where the worlds collide yes? But"
"But?' Derek prompted after a few moments of silence.
She walked towards him, "I put this place," she paused, "I divided my heart in half. I was never going to stop loving this place and the people here but I couldn't – I couldn't be here and I move on. With Kevin, I tried really hard to move on but I think the memories were too fresh – I mean I still don't talk with my bros, but I've realized maybe I'm not really a Garcia—and I wasn't made to be a Lynch," she picked up a possible cardigan.
"But you were – I mean you are a Wayne."
She laughed, "A Wayne—Bruce wanted to be a Garcia."
She thought about their wedding day as she looked at the shoes she wore.
"We fit – for a time - we did. We both lost our parents and we loved each other for a while," she said picking up a dark purple zebra print cardigan, "but," she said with a deep sigh, "I packed this place away," she said looking at the closet – "and Jack, he just hated change—if it were up to him. We would still live on Hancock street playing Robin Hood. But we have to change eventually. I hate change, but it is inevitable."
"What do you think? Or should I go toned down black and grey. Jack will be Jack no matter what?"
"What does that mean?" Derek asked concerned for her safety.
"Jekyll and Hyde you know crass and angry with a dash of sexual frustration then nice and sweet caring even—I'm going to go slightly drab—more like Penelope before Holly."
Derek looked up questioningly.
"I haven't seen him in a couple of years—he likes Penelope circa 1999-2005."
"I get it," Derek said smiling.
"Turn Please – Goddess must change."
Derek chuckles as he looks at the rest of closet amazed that there is more to her wardrobe… well, more to her life than what he knew. His best friend kept a big secret … a 6 foot 4 secret and his brain was just trying to figure it out.
"I hope Jack isn't involved because then it really involves me. I hope it one of those billionaire muckity mucks. I mean – I feel like my head is going to explode with all of this news. I just want Alfred home safe and then I want to go home. I want to be on your couch with you feeding me mojitos till I forget my name… a true mental vacation."
Her phone goes off, "D who is it?" she asks since he was holding one of her 4 phones.
"Theo – are you decent," he asked raising the phone…
"No," she sighed heavier, "I'll call him tonight."
She sighed again, "will things ever be the same?" she pondered aloud.
Penelope emerged wearing a wool grey skirt with black boots and a turtleneck. Her cardigan was electric blue with hibiscus white flowers and a matching blue headband.
"Reid we should head out. It's like an hour and half drive and the Director… uhm, Dr. Grey… will meet us there."
Bruce ran his fingers through his hair, "I should go with you he—he's"
"I'll be ok – Jack won't hurt me," Penelope said confidently.
"The joker might," Bruce added as if he'd said this to her a thousand times and it never resonated.
Reid piped in, "You can observe," when the room gives him a questioning look he responds with, "Bruce may be able to rile him up in a way I can't and he may give us a clue. It's a 72 minute trip—I'm sure I can think of a few questions."
Da-da-dum, The next chapter was my favorite one to write! I love the Joker, I so don't feel like I gave him enough justice but I love him none the less! For my Derek and Penelope lovers, I just started a new story called Breaking a Habit takes 30 days (well, 21).
Please review... let me know what you like, love, and just thought was meh.