The night sky of Lugunica was riddled with beautiful, large, bright stars. Anyone to gaze up at the dark night, could only gawk at the beautiful sight.
"...anddddd... That should be it!"
In the midst of the beautiful night, unfortunately for the bright stars, only one person was witnessing the sight.
That one person being Subaru Natsuki.
And unfortunately for the stars, not even he was looking up at them, as Subaru was too busy working his ass off to notice it's beauty.
"Thanks for acknowledging me!" The boy flashes a thumbs up to the sky.
"Because Thirth Person is taking too long, imma just tell you what I've done between the last time most of you have seen me."
"PoV switch!"
"Sane boy's PoV"
SUP!
How's life been treating y'all? Well it's been treating me like shit!
For the past few weeks, I've been none stop removing these little arm things from all these NPCs. Annoying, right?
I even missed Halloween and the turkey holiday for this shit!(I wanted to take Beako trick or treating and wanted to trick her into eating an uncooked turkey)
I really underestimated how difficult it would be to get them out of these people, but it really hit me like a truck full of bricks at the sheer difficulty of this shit.
I won't go into specifics, but let's just say I had to learn how to do some extremely sketchy stuff to people's hearts and that I might be on a list now.
Anyways, enough about the useless NPCs, let's talk about important matters...me!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY SECOND POWER!?
I know my first power is probably being able to do shit between chapters, but where the fuck is the second one I was promised?
Am I gonna have to unlock it by having someone close to me dying? How the fuck will that work? Not to sound like a dick, but there's really no one I care about other than my mom and dad...
Eh, who cares. I'm going the hero route and imma just hope it unlocks my second power.
I have a feeling time is gonna resume soon, so back at ya, Thirth Person.
Subaru's intuition was correct, as the world starts to pick back up again, with everything slowly gaining color once again.
"I'm bored." Subaru yawns. On top of a rooftop, Subaru was sitting on the ledge, as he looked around at the unfrozen villagers.
Despite looking well rested, mentally, Subaru was exhausted. He hadn't done anything to make him tired, but after all, not only was he crazy, but he also had a tendency to be extremely lazy.
"I'm too tired to argue." He shook his head, as he mumbled to himself.
"Mommy, mommy, who is that man up there?" A young boy tugged on his mom's hand, as he pointed up to Subaru.
"Uhm... He's a... knight?" The mother said, with her responded sounding more like a question than an actual answer.
It wasn't just the mother and son staring at the boy, but a plethora of children and adults were gazing up at the boy.
Many of the children recognized the boy as the creepy guy that came from the mansion, but there view on Subaru instantly changed, solely because of the sight they were all seeing.
The moon; a full moon, shining brightly onto Subaru's figure, making the otherwise average-looking boy look ethereal in the light.
The children looked at the boy with sparkles in their eyes, completely captivated by Subaru's surprisingly beautiful appearance, with the adults also not being to hold themselves back and gaze upon the beauty of Subaru's appearance.
Among one of the grown-ups, was the blue-haired maid of the Roswaal Manor, Rem.
She didn't at all like Subaru. Frankly, she hated the boy, but even with all her hatred, she too was among the people gawking at Subaru's figure.
"I'm so fucking hot." Subaru mumbles under his breath.
Luckily for him, none of the villagers heard his mumbling, as if they did, they would have instantly changed their view of the boy.
"In a night full of beautiful stars, even the brightest of stars can't outshine the brightest one of them all: me!."
"I'm bored. Thirth Person, start cutting out when I say return by de––" The boy mumbles out, but was heard by no one.
...
"AHH!" A random villager screams out.
Many eyes turns over to the screaming villager, and all adopt a dumbfounded expression at what they see.
The boy who was just on the roof, was now standing next to the frightened villager.
"Sup y'all!" Subaru waves to the dumbfounded crowd
."W-Woah... how did you do that mister!" A little boy asks Subaru, a glimmer of admiration sparkling in his eyes.
Unlike most of the adults, most of the children weren't as shocked, but instead looked at Subaru like he was some great mage.
Suddenly, before most of the villagers could even process the raven-haired boy's teleportation from the roof, Subaru once again disappears from the spot he was standing, appearing just a few feet away from the little boy, crouched to his small height.
"I can do it because I'm the main character!" Subaru smiles widely.
The little boy gets startled by Subaru suddenly being face-to-face to him, causing him to fall down on his bottom.
Despite being slightly startled, there was still the sparkle of admiration for Subaru in the young boy's eyes.
"S-Subaru!" From behind the raven-haired boy, a young girl's voice calls out to Subaru.
Without even having to turn around, the crazy boy already knew exactly who the girl was.
"What's up Beako?" Subaru asks.
He had a large smile on his face, not even bothering to turn around to his contracted spirit, instead, his gaze was still on the young boy.
'Not the shota, I'm looking ather' He ominously thinks to himself.
"Stop ignoring Betty and answer how you did that, I suppose!" The little spirit angrily stomps her feet.
"What do you mean, Beako?" He tries to play dumb.
Unfortunately for Subaru, Beatrice doesn't believe him, mainly because he forgot that the spirit can read some of his thoughts.
"Answer Betty!" She demands. She stopped her childishly stomping and goes to another childish tantrum; softly punching at Subaru's back.
As she was punching at the raven-haired boy, she suddenly felt her fists go through the air, causing her to open her eyes and see that Subaru wasn't there.
Before she could say anything, she feels a pair of arms wrap behind her, and a voice she has come to love entered her ears.
"I'm the main character, that's why I did that shit." Subaru calmly tells her.
"T-That's fair, I suppose." Beatrice timidly nods.
She wasn't used to Subaru's hugs, but it was something that she knew she loved. The warmness that radiated through her body as she felt her head rest against Subaru's chest, was just the best feeling to her.
"I love you, Beako." Subaru whispers in her ear.
A cute squeal comes out of the little loli's mouth, obviously not used to the attention.
"B-Betty cares for you too..." She shyly tells back, shyly looking down at the ground.
After hearing her response, Subaru once again disappears and is now laying on the ground near Beatrice's feet, staring up at her eyes.
"Good. I need to keep up my lolimancer appearance." He smirks.
"How are you actually doing that?" Beatrice pouts.
She didn't know how Subaru was suddenly teleporting around, with Beatrice being very confused that she couldn't sense any mana usage off of him.
"I'm just moving very fast." Subaru shrugged off, now standing near the crowd of villagers.
Of course that wasn't what was making Subaru teleport, but somehow, even though Beatrice could detect if Subaru's lying, Beatrice's ability to detect the lies off him, had itself lied to the great spirit, as it told her Subaru's words were the truth.
"Ahem."
The clearing of someone's throat catches both spirit and contractor's attention.
"I think we should head back to the mansion, Subaru-sama and Beatrice-sama." Rem calmly says, bowing towards the crazy boy and spirit.
Subaru's eyes widen at the maid's words, almost as if he realized something important.
"We need to kill the mabeasts in the forest!" He exclaims while teleporting crazily all over the place.
"Ah. There is mana crystals around the village. Those mana crystals makes mabeasts unable to invade the village." Rem explains to Subaru.
"B-But they have the the lolis and shotas hostage!" Subaru screams out, grabbing his face like the crazy boy he is.
"What?" Both his spirit and Rem say in unison.
Subaru stops his wild teleporting and worried expression, adopting a more serious posture and expression.
"The children."
The crowd behind Subaru heard his words, and all became extremely worried.
"W-What!?" They all scream out.
"H-How? They were just here..." A woman with orange hair questioned, tears threatening to pour down her face.
"I don't know Petra's mom, maybe if you were a better mom they wouldn't have gone out there." He disapprovingly shakes his head.
"I-I— I-I'm sorry." The woman; Petra's mother, was about to argue with Subaru, but quickly shut her mouth.
"Don't worry Petra's mom! I'll make up for your shitty parenting and save the loli!" Subaru confidently puffs out his chest.
"The True Honoured One""
"Don't worry Petra's mom, I'll save the loli!" I tell the hot lady Infront of me.
"..." Petra's mom stays silent, not even bothering to thank me.
Geez, what a bitch!
As I'm talking to Petra's hot ass mommy, I suddenly feel someone tightly grab on my ear, tugging it around as if they want to rip it off.
"You should be nicer, sonny." An old grandma tells me, as she continues to try to rip my ear off!
"Haha~ sorry saggy tits, I'll try to be nicer from now on!" I kindly tell the old hag.
I'm already extremely nice, so fuck off granny!
The old hag suddenly disappears from this world.
Obviously a sign that she liked my words!
My little loli spirit walks up to me and looks at me with a strange expression on her cute little face.
"What was that?" She asks me.
"What do you mean?" I ask her.
Honestly, what's up with this loli?
"Where did you put the old woman?" She asks about some nonsense, this time her voice sounded kinda tired.(Sleepy Beako?)
"What old woman? You must be tired Beako, go back in your pokeball."
"The old woman that was rig..." Beako trails on in her delusions, but I don't wanna narrate that shit.
Poor Beako... I need to get that shit checked out.
Can't be having a crazy little loli on my payroll.
"I return by––"
I put on sum badass shades, as time comes to a stop.
"How does Thirth Person does this shit!?" Like cum on, how the fuck does that being even do this shit?
"I'm going mute for the rest of the chapter, this shit has tired me out." I really tired myself out with this little ass section...i really underestimated just how hard both of your jobs are, Thirth Person, Thirth Person...
"Betty doesn't think this is a good idea..." The spirit tells her contractor.
Rem, Subaru and Beatrice, all went into the mabeast infested forest in order to save the kids from the ferocious beasts.
Rem was slightly hesitant to enter the infested forest, but after Subaru excitedly skipped into the forest; with the little Beatrice on his shoulders, Rem reluctantly followed him inside, as she still wanted to keep an eye on the crazy boy.
Now the three were walking in the dark, gloomy forest, with Subaru surprisingly trying his best to locate the lost children; despite being the whole reason why the children were in the predicament...
"..." Subaru stays silent, as he takes confident steps forward.
His confidence almost made it seemed like Subaru knew exactly where the children were, which was the case, but wasn't because he had seen it in a different loop, but rather because he had placed the children in the forest.
"Hmph. Talk to Betty, I suppose." The little spirit huffed out, pulling on Subaru's hair.
"..." Even as Beatrice pulled at his hair, the dark-haired boy continued to keep his mouth shut.
Not only was he weirdly silent, but another strange oddity, was the boy's lack of head control.
Beatrice was surprised. As she was tugging at his hair, she was somehow able to move his head around in an abnormal, doll-like way.
A smidge of worry for the boy creeped into Beatrice's thoughts, but she shook it off,
"And what is that stupid thing covering your eyes, I suppose." Beatrice pouted.
She didn't have any opinion about the mysterious sunglasses that suddenly appeared on the boy's face, but just wanted Subaru to stop ignoring her.
"..." Unfortunately for her, Subaru stayed silent.
Beatrice tugging Subaru's hair, but the crazy boy didn't let out a peep. He kept confidently walking through the dense forest.
The three continued walking through the forest in silence; with Beatrice still trying to get Subaru's attention, until the three came upon a peculiar sight.
Several of the village children, all unconscious, laying on a pile of dirt, but not only that, several unconscious mabeasts were around the children.
The three came to a stop behind a tree––
"Stop, I suppose." Beatrice hardly tugged Subaru's hair back, as even though Subaru saw the mabeasts, he had still been walking forward.
Beatrice's hair pull wasn't enough to stop him, as despite her hard tugging, Subaru kept walking forward.
Beatrice quickly realized that Subaru was set on confronting the beasts, so she shot a desperate pleading expression towards Rem.
"Fine." Rem rolls her eyes, annoyed by the boy's behavior.
Rem walks over to the boy and yanks his hand back, but to her surprise, Subaru's hand doesn't budge a single inch, as he continues to walk forward.
Rem tried to yank him back again, but his hand stayed firm.
"Stop you moron." Rem desperately said, as she realized that they were getting closer to a mabeast.
She knew she could easily kill the mabeast, but she also knew that it would awaken the other beasts, the same beasts who were extremely close to the children.
"..." Rem's plea went in one ear and out the other, with Subaru keeping his pace forward, as the two girls were desperately trying to hold him back.
The girls kept pulling at Subaru, but it was all for naught, as Subaru stepped onto one of the mabeasts' tail.
The mabeast slowly stirred awake. The two girls watched in slow motion, as the mabeast slowly got up on all fours.
"GRR–!" The beast lets out a loud growl, awakening the other unconscious mabeasts and also waking up the children.
"..." The situation looked dire, but Subaru kept moving forward.
The beast that Subaru had stepped on quickly moves it's furry tail, swiping Subaru off his feet, throwing him face down on a pile of dirt.
Beatrice goes flying off of his shoulders, launching off and impacting into a tree.
Subaru stayed face-planted on the ground, whilst the mabeast began to approach the boy.
"S-Subaru!" The little loli screamed out, launching a Minya at the mabeast near Subaru.
"..." Suddenly out of nowhere, the seemingly out of commission Subaru, quickly shoots his arm up in the air, looking almost like an attempt to stop the Minya from hitting the beast, but it fails, as it not only hits Subaru straight on his palm but also goes through it and pierces the outer skin of the beast.
"..." Even though his hand was completely shredded, his dismembered fingers flying to different directions, even with all of that, the dark-haired boy didn't let out a peep.
"S-Suba...ru..." Beatrice yelled out to boy, but her voice died in her throat as she saw the mabeast pounce on Subaru.
The wolgarm launched itself onto Subaru's back and wildly scratched at the poor boy's defenseless self, tearing off chunks of his skin with each swipe of it's claws.
Swipe after swipe, after swipe, after swipe.
The beast viscously tore at Subaru's flesh. With each swipe of it's claw, it threw the torn flesh of the boy with each drawback of it's claw onto the dirty ground of the forest.
Subaru's body was now a mangled, bloody mess of torn flesh. The skin of his back was entirely torn off, with most of his bones being turned to dust by the weight of the beast on his back and his innards also not looking much better, as they were completely pulverized, now resembling a gross, beef-like mush,
"..." Somehow, Subaru was still alive.
Subaru's body was completely numb. At the beginning of his brutalization, Subaru had felt an immense pain shoot through his body, with every part of his body burning, even the parts that weren't picked at by the wolgarm were screaming out in pain, but it seemed his body had completely shut down.
His body was growing cold, it was close to death.
Even with his death approaching, Subaru didn't let out a single squeak.
No screaming.
No crying.
Just pure silence from him.
"..."
The light was slowly leaving the boy's eyes, and it was anything but peaceful.
If he would had tilted his head up, he would've seen that the children were in the same condition as him, with the lucky ones being deceased, and the others were crying out.
"AHHH!" A boy, Lucas, let out a gutteral cry as the wolgarm continued to take chunks out of him.
"N-NO!" Another young boy, Cain, cries out. Tears streamed out of his face, as he was in pain; both physically and mentally.
The wolgarm had stopped attacking Cain, but it had completely torn off his legs and his right arm.
Despite not being attacked anymore, the boy was surely about to lose his life, albeit slowly. Because of the slow death, the poor young boy was forced to watch his friends be brutalized by the cruel wolgarms, as he slowly bled out.
"P-Please...kill me..." The other living child was Petra. Unlike her friends, and unlike how a child should be in a situation like this, Petra was completely emotionless, with only tears staining her small face.
A few feet away from Subaru, another small girl was hurting.
"Subaru..." A blonde girl mumbled out with dead eyes.
"Why... Why can't Betty be happy..." Tears stream down the little spirit's face, staining her small dress.
The girl was broken.
She was forced to watch as the large beast tore through her contractor's skin, forced to watch it viciously tear off piece by piece of her dear contractor.
The girl felt guilty.
Beatrice knew full well that she could easily kill the beast, but she couldn't.
She wanted to help Subaru, she wanted to save him, but she couldn't.
Something was stopping her from doing so.
She wanted to move her small legs, but she felt zero feeling in her legs, almost as if she had no control over them.
"Betty is sorry..." She looked down to her lap, too hurt to stare at Subaru's brutalization any longer.
She felt hopeless.
Just a few hours before the terrible disaster, she felt the happiest she's ever felt.
Just the day prior, she was given a sweet by her beloved contractor, a sweet that she absolutely loved and was awaiting for more.
It was three days since she met the one who gave her such happiness.
Subaru.
She adored Subaru.
She wanted to be useful to him.
She wanted him to adore her as well.
And that's what Subaru gave her.
In just the few days of their contract, Subaru gave her everything she wanted.
Subaru showered her with praise, gave her everything she wanted, told her any story she wanted, and most importantly, cured her of her loneliness.
Beatrice had been childishly imagining how she would spend her life with Subaru.
She imagined Subaru finding love, she imagined Subaru and his wife having a child, she imagined Subaru's child and her fighting for Subaru's attention.
She didn't want to think of parting with him, avoiding thinking about Subaru's death at an old age, but unfortunately for the poor spirit, Subaru would be leaving her much earlier.
"B-Betty is sorry...b-but Betty will repent for her slothfulness..." The girl tearfully apologized, bringing her hands up to cover her eyes, too afraid to look at Subaru's mangled body.
"B-Betty is sorry." Beatrice apologizes one last time...Yet another child dies in the forest.
"..." Subaru was barely breathing as death closed in on him.
The boy felt a warm breath on the back of his head and then felt a large pain spike through his entire body.
He died.
1
"GRR–!" The beast lets out a loud growl, awakening the other unconscious mabeasts and also waking up the children.
"..." The situation looked dire, but Subaru kept moving forward––He tripped.
Subaru fell face first into the wolgarm's dark-grey fur, angering the beasts even more.
Beatrice looked the wolgarm in it's eyes and saw it's hunger for Subaru, so she brought her arm up and pointed her palm to the beast.
"No you do...n't..." She was too late.
The mabeast had moved at an extreme level of speed, a level a speed that was impossible for wolgarms, and cleanly took a bite of Subaru's head.
It chomped on his head like a piece of bumble gum.
He died.
2
"..." The situation looked dire, but Subaru kept moving forward.
The beast that Subaru had stepped on quickly moves it's furry tail and attempts to swipe Subaru off his feet, but fails, as Subaru took a quick step to the left.
Unfortunately for Subaru, his quick sidestep would have worked perfectly, if not for a large, sharp branch poking from a tree.
The branch pierced through Subaru ear canal with perfect precision, instantly killing him from the stab.
He died.
3
"Subaru!" Beatrice screamed out.
The loop was different.
Subaru didn't awake the wolgram from it's slumber, nor did he step on the beast's tail, no, he was somewhere entirely different.
He was somewhere... warm and moist.
"GRR–!" A loud growl roared out, but it sounded extremely close to Subaru...
"S-Su...baru..." Beatrice quickly approached the boy, but was too late;yet again.
The beast had chomped down.
Subaru died.
4
"..." Subaru came back to life.
His head turned slightly to the left and was met with the sight of his adorable Beatri––
Death.
Subaru had no time to react, as he was only able to see for a second, but in that split second, he was met by a sharp pain around his head.
It was the jaw of the wolgarm biting his head off.
Subaru died.
5
"..." Subaru came back to life.
His head moved slightly to the right and was met eyes with the beautiful Re––
Death.
Yet again, Subaru had no time to react, as his head was once again clamped down on.
He died.
6
"..." Subaru came back to life.
His head tilted down, meeting the eyes of Emilia and Puc––
Death.
Subaru was in a hopeless situation.
His checkpoint had seemingly updated with his head inside the mouth of a wolgarm.
He couldn't do anything.
No, he could only do one thing...
Subaru died.
7
"..." Life came back to Subaru.
He looked up and was met with the sight of the creepy margrav––
Death.
Subaru is trapped in a infinite loop.
He has no way out.
It seems that the seemingly invincible Subaru, the same Subaru that arrogantly claimed himself to be a god, has been bested.
Subaru died.
"...81..." Subaru muttered out, soundly extremely tired, as he came back to life.
81 times.
Subaru has died 81 times in the mouth of the wolgarm.
Subaru had started mumbling out his death counter at 11deaths. He would tiredly mumble out the number, only to be killed a second later.
It was extremely hard for him to know even when he died, as if he opened his eyes, he would see the darkness of the wolgarm's mouth.
The only thing helping him keep track of his death toll was the intense pain that he would feel each time the wolgarm's mouth closed on his neck.
Subaru died.
"...261..." Subaru came back to life.
Subaru is tired of dying.
But he will continue to die, unless he somehow loses his power...
Subaru died.
"...1,000... thousand mark..."For the first time in the wolgarm loops, Subaru mumbled out something other than a number.
Subaru died.
"...58,008...nice..."
Subaru comes back to death.
Subaru is dying.
Subaru can't stop dying.
No one can help Subaru.
Subaru died.
"...173,036..."
Life comes back to Subaru.
Life is dying.
Life cannot stop without Subaru.
Life died.
"5,138,008!" For the first time in any of the previous loops, Subaru's voice doesn't sound tired.
"Of course no––"
Subaru died.
"5,138,009." He states his count.
"Sorry Thirth Person, I was sl––"
Subaru died.
"I was sleeping. Oh, and it's been 5,138,010 deaths." He says with a smirk, a smirk that no one would ever see.
"They'll see me in a bi––"
Subaru di––
"I am the return by death guy. Don't interrupt me Thirth Person."
Right as the wolgarm chomps down on his neck, time comes to a standstill, saving Subaru from the death.
"That was some good ass sleep!" Subaru exclaims with a smirk, while still inside the wolgarm.
"Let's get out of here." He tells himself, as he slowly worms his head out of the creatures head.
The slimy saliva on Subaru's head stayed frozen in midair, as Subaru retracted his head from the damp place.
After a few seconds of shimmying his way out, Subaru finally gets his head out of the mouth.
"Ahh~... this guy's mouth was pretty comfortable." He pat the snout of the wolgarm, almost like one would do to a puppy.
Despite being killed over millions of times by the creature, Subaru was surprisingly very affectionate with the ugly creature.
"Nah, nobody reading my journey will believe I actually died that many times, nor will they care." He waves off with a neutral expression, despite his words coming off extremely self-deprecating.
"I'm not depressed dickhead, you just didn't go into enough detail for them to care about my deaths." He rolls his eyes.
"You spent more time talking about lolis and shotas dying, which by the way, that was so uncalled for! I know I'm supposed to be a dick, but I wouldn't go that far to explain how children died! You're so ducked up Thirth Person." He said.
Subaru knew he couldn't tell anyone of his loops, more specifically, he couldn't tell anyone of his many deaths.
Subaru wouldn't want to yell to the sky of his deaths, but he sure would like to at least tell some people of his absurd ability.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I can freely talk about my deaths all I want, but I don't, because it'll make the writing harder for Thirth Person. Oh, and I won't talk about it until 'Thirth Person' arrives." He says.
"You don't like her, huh?" He says.
"Is it because I like her better than you?!" He says.
"Haha– I knew you liked me!" He says.
"You've been a tsun-tsun this whole time! What a twist!" He says.
"Okay, okay, I see you want this shit to go somewhere else, so let's start cleaning up my mess.Besides, none of the readers will get any of this shit yet." He told himself.
He knew he was taking too much time indulging in his delusional talks, so he wanted to do something productive and get rid of the wolgarms.
"Fuck you. Well, I'm gonna clean this place up, be right back."
"Suba...ru..." Beatrice scream died in her throat.
Time had just resumed; not that Beatrice would know it ever stopped.
One moment she was about to witness the terrible sight of Subaru having his head bitten off, the next, he's suddenly out of danger and standing on a large pile of wolgarm corpses.
"You think it's a time waste to care about myself?" The boy ignores the voice calling out to him, as he was too busy talking nonsense to himself.
In the moment where time was at a standstill, Subaru had went on a killing spree in the gloomy forest, killing every wolgarm he laid his eyes on.
All he had to do was whisper his secret into their furry ears, then bam, they would fall down dead.
"Explain how cool I look Thirth Person."
Subaru was standing atop the pile of dozens of fallen beasts. The boy was completely drenched in the beasts' blood, with his tracksuit completely ruined in a dark red, with his joggers being in a similar state.
He still wore the sunglasses that he pulled out of nowhere, but he also had a new accessory resting on his head.
Laying on his hair was a shiny, luxurious, golden crown, with many jewels running along the sides of the crown: blood red rubies, emeralds that looked as if they were glowing, and beautiful shining diamonds.
Frankly, the crown looked like something only the richest of the rich could afford, but here it was resting atop a mentally insane, broke boy.
"Hmph. I don't know what you're talking about." He puffs out his chest, something that would've looked cute if someone like Beatrice did so, but just ended up looking weird on Subaru.
"..." Both girls; Beatrice and Rem, had their jaws agape as they stared up at Subaru.
In their eyes, Subaru disappeared from next to them and instantly reappeared with his head inside of a wolgarm, only for him to be suddenly standing on a pile of the beasts' corpses.
It was all very confusing for them.
"Beako." While staring up at the stars, Subaru calls out to his spirit.
"Y-Yes?" She timidly asks.
"Some fucking perv has been whispering to me about something called 'Divine Protections', can you be a good drill loli and kill that person for me?" He asks, grabbing his head and shaking it wildly.
"..." The little librarian doesn't respond.
She didn't know what to say.
Her mind was already occupied with trying to figure out how a large amount of beast corpses suddenly appeared below Subaru's feet.
So now that Subaru told her about the weird voices in his head, she didn't know what to say or do.
"Hey Rem, can you do me a favor?" Ignoring that his spirit ignored him, Subaru turns his attention over to the blue-haired maid.
"Yes, S-Subaru-sama?" While still slightly stunned; unlike Beatrice, Rem was lucid enough to answer back to Subaru.
"Smile for me." He asks of her.
"H-Huh?" Rem loses her neutral expression, as she expected many things that he would ask of her, but hadn't anticipated that.
"You might think I'm weird for this, but I need you to smile for me." He insists for her to smile.
Subaru's request might seem very strange to Rem, but unknown to Rem, the simple action would forever change the relationship between the two.
"Fine." Rem reluctantly complied and hid her annoyance, as she still didn't have any trust in the crazy boy.
She forces a smile on her face and stares up at the boy; with Subaru still gazing up at the stars.
The smile was on her face for a few seconds, but slowly started to fade from her face, but was stopped by Subaru speaking up.
"Keep that smile for another few seconds." He told her, still not even bothering to look at either of the girls.
"..." Rem kept the same forced smile on her face, but behind the smile, she was holding back launching herself at the boy.
'He reeks of the witch's scent!' She screamed in her mind.
She wasn't just shocked by the bizzare scene like Beatrice was, but she was stunned by the large amount of miasma that reeked from Subaru.
The stench coming from the crazy boy's body was absolutely ludicrous, with the stench almost making it hard for Rem to stay conscious.
"Sorry bout that." Out of nowhere, Subaru apologizes for something.
'Huh?' Rem's fake smile drops from her face, as she is hit with another confusion bomb.
The disgusting stench that was radiating off Subaru all of a sudden vanished. Any trace of the scent in the air was gone, with Rem no longer being able to smell even a hint of miasma off Subaru.
This was certainly something that alarmed Rem, but at the same time got her to question Subaru as a person.
Ever since Subaru stepped foot into the mansion, Rem was adamant that he was a witch cultist. The disgusting stench coming from him was something only cultists shared, with Rem knowing all too well how they smelt.
While Rem was in her little state of confusion, the massive pile of mabeasts disappear from under Subaru's feet, with him now standing on the forest's dirt.
"Ahh~ it's been so long since I've touched grass." Subaru took a sigh of relief.
Subaru's relief was short lived, as his expression turned into a look of discomfort, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance.
"Hey, Thirth Person! Can you tell that thing to shut the fuck up." Subaru angrily exclaimed to his delusion.
Subaru was hearing things.
There was nothing whispering in his ears, and there was nothing beaming words into his mind.
There was nothing.
Just like all of his other delusions, Subaru was just makin––
'Shut up. Your bitch ass is denying all of it, but I just know you're gonna switch up in the future about all this shit.' He thought.
"Perfect being's PoV"
This is bullshit!
Thirth Person is purposely lying to me! I just know it knows what's bothering me, but it is purposely not telling me!
I'm protesting again!
I hate Thirth Person!
The thing took over a whole month to get this chapter out and I have to put up with that shit? Fuck no! You fanfictioners(your nickname I gave you readers) are lucky these are being uploaded in a bunch!
If Thirth Person does that shit again, I'm gonna stage a coup and throw Thirth Person out of office! No, better yet, I'm gonna kill Thirth Person and replace it by a real person.
Yes, I need to do that.
I need to be able to talk with my narrator and I need my narrator to actually help me!
I'm tired of Thirth Person ignoring me and working for others! I need someone who is exclusive to me and not someone who's pimping themselves out to other writers!
...unrelated to anything of that... Let's talk about what position I'm in rn––
[Before that, I'd like to take the time to thank the sponsor of this chapter: UppyBone.
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"Grr–!" A little mabeast growls behind the busty maid.
The little fucker is about as big as a pug, so I have no clue why it decided to pick this fight with Rem.
"Ah~! Save me Subaru-kun!" The busty Rem lets out a surpr––
Uhm...I have to confess something viewers...
Don't worry! I didn't do some shady shit, but it's something that might upset some people...
Warning! Warning! Warning! If you are feeling depressed, suicidal, or anything in-between, you might want to skip my next sentences...
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.
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Don't get upset at me dear readers, but I may have accidentally forgot to hand over control to Thirth Person while in the forest...
Basically what I'm getting at is that I'm not in the forest right now, but actually, am sleeping on a fluffy bed in the mansion...Sowy! ~
I know, I know, I'm aware there might be riots on the streets because I didn't capture the juicy content of Rem falling head over heels for me, and I didn't capture how I saved the lolis and shotas...uhm...I think I might have undersold it...
It's actually been a couple of weeks since the forest incident...oopsies!
In my defense, I was too caught in the moment!
I was teleporting all around the forest collecting the children up and returning them, and then pretty much everything went like the canon route.(Don't ask how)
Rn, I'm sleeping in my comfy ass bed with my adorable Beako, with even Rem sleeping at the foot at my bed!
Idk why she's there, but ever since the forest incident, she's been giving me 'fuck me' eyes, so it might be something to do with that.
Don't worry readers! I'm not upset that Rem didn't try to save me in the million death loop( or what I like to call it: boobies loop)
"Ahh~!" That's me! I let out a adorable yawn, as I wake up from my slumber!
Unfortunately both Beako and Rem are asleep, meaning they both missed out on my cute ass yawn!
The sun was rising up, shining it's rays into every home around the world, waking the inhabitants up from their deep sleep.
In the Roswaal Mansion however, all but one of the residents were asleep, with the only conscious one being the insane boy: Subaru Natsuki.
"Yawn~" The boy let's out a surprisingly cute yawn, stretching his arms out as he sits up from his laying position.
It had been weeks since the unfortunate events of the forest. The events of the night could only be described as otherworldly; even for this magical world.
Many deaths happened that night, with all of them being either mabeasts or Subaru. Of course there was the assassin's death in one loop, but of course Subaru reversed his best friend's death.
"Oh yeah! I forgot that Elsa showed up!" Subaru exclaims, jumping up on the bed.
"One more minute..." The groggy Beatrice cutely mumbles in her sleep.
Ignoring his cute spirit's sleeping self, Subaru continues to be a nuisance as he jumps around his bed.
"I was like bom bom, and then Elsa-tan was like bam bam, and even Rem joined in! Shit was crazy!"
Almost like a child, Subaru reenacts what he did in that forest, swinging his arms around wildly as he mimics the punches he gave many wolgarms.
Because Subaru was being incredibly loud, it wasn't a surprise that a certain blue-haired maid woke up from her sleep.
"S-Subaru-kun?" Rem rapidly blinks her eyes, as she tries to see if what she is seeing is real.
After a few seconds of her eyes adjusting to the light, Rem eyes quickly widen and she worriedly climbs onto Subaru's bed.
"G-Get down from there!" Almost like a worried mother, Rem tries to get him to sit down.
"Come on Rem-rin, I'll be fine." Not taking her worries seriously, Subaru just waves the maid off, not at all concerned for his own well-being.
Fortunately for him, his use of Rem's new nickname made the girl stop him.
"J-Just be careful..." She instantly turns her face towards the window, not wanting for Subaru to see her blushing face.
'What's up with Rem? She's not supposed to be this horny for me yet...right?' Subaru thinks to himself.
Meanwhile in the blue maid's mind, an entirely different conversation was happening.
'Subaru-kun said my name, Subaru-kun said my name, SUBARU-KUN SAID MY NAME! Subaru-kun... Subaru-kun...Subaru-kun...' The girl was obsessed with Subaru.
"OC alert!" The crazy boy shouts out as he points his finger towards Rem.
"H-Hey! Rem doesn't like that name." Rem pouts.
There was many reasons why she didn't like the name, but a main reason why she didn't like it was because it reminded her that she used to heavily distrust Subaru.
"But it explains you perfectly! You're not following the script!" He smirks.
"R-Rem doesn't know what that means!" Her pout deepens.
The crazy boy loses his smirk and adopts a more friendly smile, teleports to just mere inches away from Rem's face.
"Calm down Rem-rin, I'm just fucking with ya." He said with a large smile.
"Kyah—!" She squeals, her cheeks turning ever more red, as she instantly scooted away from him.
'S-Subaru-kun wants to f-fuck me?!'
Even in her thoughts she was was stammering.
"Eh, I guess so." Almost as if reading her thoughts, Subaru looked intently at the maid.
"She is cute..." His gaze is locked on her face.
Rem; just like her sister, was extremely good-looking.
Not only does she have a pretty face, but she also has a body that the womanizer named Subaru would certainly take advantage of.
"What are these accusations!?" He screams out.
With him being extremely loud, his screaming unfortunately wakes up his poor sleeping spirit.
"Why are you screaming?" The spirit asks, rubbing her eyes as she tries to adjust to the light.
"I have you know, i appreciate Rem's personality more than her cute face and figure!" Ignoring his rude awakening of his spirit, he continues to argue why he isn't an incel.
Being the fangirl that she is, Rem's cheeks turn an even brighter shade of pink.
'Subaru-kun is so nice!' The poor maid innocently thought.
The maid had never had anyone treat her the way Subaru treats her.
Of course Subaru wasn't a perfect person.
Just like many others, he too made mistakes. He was flawed like any other and wasn't always the nicest to her, but yet, Rem couldn't help for fall for him.
She doesn't know why or how she did. Subaru was constantly making fun of her when they returned back to the mansion, always cracking jokes about stupid and confusing things. But even through all the joking he did, Rem still fell in love with him.
Even though Subaru was normally always being the insane guy he is, there was some lucid moments in-between their days that really made Subaru's good traits shine.
"She loves me for the plot!" He flashes a thumbs up to the roof.
"...Betty is going back to sleep." The spirit snuggles back into the bed.
"One, two, three...Victory!" "V-Victory!"
In the mansion's garden, a blue-haired maid and a psychopath were doing morning stretches.
"Stop staring at my butt, Rem-rim!" In the middle of a squat, the boy instantly spins around and points an accusatory finger at the maid.
Obviously the maid wasn't perving on hi––
"R-Rem is sorry for staring at Subaru-kun's round buttocks!" She apologizes with a guilty expression.
Without even looking at the maid, he somehow hit it spot on, perfectly guessing that Rem was perving on his plump tush.
"You two are pervs!" Subaru rapidly turns his head between Rem and... the sky.
The two continue their stretches, with Rem continuously apologizing throughout the whole session.
Just when the two were going to stop their stretching, suddenly, over in the distance, a dragon pulling a carriage was traveling towards them.
"Huh?" Subaru stops mid stretch and squints his eye in the distance.
Rem looks at the dark-haired boy's confused expression, and also stops her stretching as she looked to see what he was staring at.
"Oh... That must be them." Rem nods to herself.
"Them?" Subaru asks, tilting his head in confusion.
"It's the Kart— oh..." Rem was starting to explain to Subaru who they were, but the crazy boy disappeared from his spot.
Inside of the carriage was a cute cat demi-human, with fluffy little cat ears poking through their hair.
Also riding in the carriage was a older man, which despite his old age, seemed to be in good shape and was in a better state than normal people his age usually are.
"...sch-sama then found me! And here nyah~ thought nyah~ was hiding wel— AHH!"
In the middle of conversing with the older man, the demi-human let's out a shriek as something suddenly appears sitting next to him.
"Oh wow! This shit looks so cool!"
It was Subaru.
Subaru looks around in the carriage's interior, completely ignoring the frightened catgirl(?) and the glaring old man.
"Who are you?" In an instant, the old man shoots up from his seat and immediately tries to draw a sword from his side, but to his confusion he finds nothing.
"Nuh-uh, you are not gonna kill me again gramps!" Subaru smirks and teasingly wags his finger to the man.
"..." The catgirl was staring daggers at the boy. She didn't know who the person infront of her was, but even though she didn't know who he was, she felt as if the man infront of her was someone dangerous.
"Ah! Can't have my favorite knight hating me!" Subaru grimaced, clutching his heart in pain.
"Who are nyah?" The catgirl asks, glaring down the boy. Unfortunately for the girl, she choose the wrong set of dialogue.
The smirk on Subaru's face grew, then suddenly, he thrusted his hips forward and pointed his finger to the sky.
"My name is Subaru Nyahtsuki! Not only am I broke as fuck, but I'm also super duper clueless!" He introduced himself, being met with frowns by both catgirl and old man.
The catgirl speaks up to the boy, not liking the answer Subaru gave her.
"Are yo––"
"Nah. I'm not with the cult."
Almost as if reading her mind, the raven-haired boy answers the girl before she even fully got her words out.
"Then, who ar––"
"I'm Subaru Natsuki." He interrupted her again.
"I know, but who are you aff––"
"I'm with the half-elf and the clown. Oh! I'm also the guy that the sword saint's crushing on." He told them.
"Reinhard?" The old man mutters under his breath.
"Yup! That guy is crazy about me." Subaru lies straight to the man's face.
"Anyways! Let's talk about you Ferris!" Turning his attention to the catgirl, Subaru quickly spins around and stares at the girl's face.
He stares into her eyes, appreciating her eyes and also her beautiful face.
Out of thin air, a beautiful rose materializes in Subaru's hand.
"Wanna go be my girlfriend?" Subaru confidently asks, smiling charmingly at the girl, as he hands the rose to the girl.
"..." The catgirl deadpans at the insane boy.
"Even your blank face looks cute as fuck." Subaru tries to shoot his shot again.
"..." The catgirl stays staring at him with her deadpan expression.
"I need to do better chat!" The insane boy says to nowhere.
"*Ahem* *tips crown with rizz*Will this fine shyt allow a sigma like me to court her." He further proves that he has no experience with women.
"I'm a guy." The catgi–catboy reveals.
"So? Doesn't mean I can't put it in the sphincter." Subaru shrugs, not at all shocked by the reveal.
"I'm not into guys." The catboy blankly says.
"Fair. Neither am I."
Surprisingly, Subaru takes no for an answer and doesn't try to push forward.
"What do you take me for, Thirth Person!?" Subaru lashes out on his delusion.
"Scene switch!"
"Hehe~" Inside of a dark room, a certain raven-haired boy was giggling to himself.
"The chapter was super fucking boring?... I don't know. All I know is that this chap was def not worth the month wait."
Whilst the catboy, Felix Argyle, was discussing stuff with Emilia, Subaru was in his room with all the lights off and the windows covered.
With him in the room was Rem; whose sitting in the corner of the room.
"She's in the cuck chair chat." He whispers, which because Rem wasn't human, she heard it perfectly and it brought a blush to the oni's face.
"Before we end this, make sure to follow me and favorite this shite! Hit that little review button and glaze my ass! Go follow my Instagrass, go follow my Twitter, go follow my TitTop, go follow my everything to stay notified when imma post next!" The boy starts saying weird terms.
"And again, thanks to my sponsor! Remember, if you can't get the tiny buddy downstairs up, use UppyBone to get that shit bricked!
"Anyways... It's about that time Thirth Person!"
"End the chapter."
"Why is Pinky her lawyer!?"
Hehe~ I tricked Thirth Person into leaving before the chapter actually ends hehe~ I'm such a sellout hehe~ anyways, welcome Fanfiction folks to my life! I bless you with my amazing life story, your welcome! Because this site doesn't have author notes like that other site, imma just be putting the notes at the end like this. Yw