Chapter 1

Erza flipped through the pages of the file, and dowsed over them closely. She bit her lip as she wondered and brainstormed.

"So, Mr. Makarov, you… have gotten a lot of your blood pressure under control. But you say that thiazide drugs aren't working for you."

She looked up from the file. "Because of your urinary incontinence…?"

The old man nodded. He sighed and shut his eyes. "Yeah. I am an old fart. What do you expect?"

Erza nodded and flipped through more pages of the file. "You had a spinal surgery done recently, right? It says here for… aha! Spinal decompression. That must be the reason for the incontinence."

Makarov nodded. "I guess. You medicine folks would know better anyways."

Erza shut the file and giggled. "That's no problem at all. Let's try Telmisartan. It has better efficacy than most other anti hypertensive drugs. It works by lowering blood pressure directly rather than causing your body to lose excess fluids like diuretics do. So it won't cause you urinary problems."

Makarov nodded lazily. "Most of that went over my head, but yes. That sounds good."

Erza smiled, and scribbled the new drug onto the file. "Make sure you continue to cut back on salt and alcohol. Even occasionally drinking can cause a good amount of damage to your liver. And… that's that."

Erza passed the file to Makarov, who looked at it once, nodded sleepily, and then passed it to a tall man in a black suit standing behind him.

"Get these, will you son?"

The man silently nodded, received the file, and walked out of the clinic. As soon as he was gone, another similar looking man took his place from outside.

Makarov stared at him tiredly and then sighed. He looked at Erza.

"Sorry, lad. I know I cause you a lot of trouble walking in here with all these clowns behind me."

Erza giggled. "I am sure it's for good reason. With the kind of work that you're doing, security is important. Just as important as your health."

Makarov shook his head. "Sometimes… I don't know. A lot of people want my blood. I try to do my best as the minister of affairs, but sometimes I wonder. Am I doing something wrong?"

Erza's smile dropped. She fidgeted a little, then slowly extended her hand across the table to place it over the old man's. Makarov looked at her.

Erza smiled. "Whatever you're doing is enough for me. For so many of us. We are at war, and rebellion and opposition of government officials is a given at this time. But you still stand strong, doing whatever this country needs. I believe in you and trust you. And a lot of other people do too. You have our support. This country's support. You will keep us safe from harm. I know that."

Makarov stared at his hand under the young woman's hands, and slowly managed a smile. "I am an old fart. What good can come from keeping me alive like this? But… It ripens my heart young again when I see young people like you trusting in me. It almost gives me motivation to do whatever the hell it is that I am doing. Thank you, lad."

Erza nodded and smiled.

The man in the black suit behind Makarov held his shoulders, and helped him off the tall chair. Makarov held his hand as he slowly trudged towards the door.

Erza stood up off her chair and joined Makarov to the door. She held his hand again, and smiled brightly at him.

"The next time we meet, Mr Makarov, let us make sure it is just a reunion. Not a medical appointment. Take good care of yourself. Please. I mean it. Not just as your doctor. As your friend too."

"Aye child, aye." Makarov's guard opened the door for him, and the chatter from outside filled the clinic that had been silent until now.

As Makarov was headed outside, he paused at the threshold. He looked at the floor anxiously, as if remembering something important… and unpleasant.

Erza stared at him. "Is everything alright? You look pale, Mr Makarov."

Makarov sighed, and tremors ran down his spine. Whatever he had recollected wasn't peaceful at all. It was grave news by the looks of it.

Almost as if… he had come to deliver that news first and visit his doctor second.

He looked at the bodyguard. "Step outside for a while, son. I havta talk with this lady alone for a minute."

The bodyguard nodded, and walked through the open door he was holding up.

Makarov waited for the noise from outside to drown out, and then… There was silence.

Erza looked at him concernedly. "Mr Makarov?"

He looked at her with his grim eyes, with a grim expression, held her wrist and led her to a couch.

Erza sat down, staring at the old man's face.

Makarov paced back and forth before Erza, and his footsteps synced with the ticking of the wall clock.

"I… I uh… received some grim news this morning. Early morning. When 'twas still dark. About the 56th company of our army.."

Erza narrowed her eyes. At first she didn't understand what was going on. The 56th company? What did that mean?

Then…

Her breaths caught up in her throat as she realised. Realisation hit her slowly. Like a brick wall falling on her in slow motion. Her palms sweated, and her spine chilled down. Shivers ran down her body.

"The… 56th company…" she mumbled. "That's where…" she gasped slowly. "That's where he is posted…"

Makarov turned to her, his eyes begging her for patience. "Nothing has happened. He is safe. He is alive and well. Everything is just fine. It's actually good news. He is…" Makarov gulped. "He is returning. The 56th company is returning home from overseas. Their tour of duty has… come to an unexpected… um… pause."

Erza looked up at him. Her eyes… seemed to shine with bitter hope. "He is… returning?"

"Yes." Makarov nodded. "While they were touring the foreign soil to look for hidden enemy outposts, the 56th company's third detachment was ambushed by a group of foreign militants. They were trapped in a swamp for a month. They were rescued by reinforcements, and they are being airdropped back to native soil. They are due to return tomorrow. I…"

Makarov gulped as he looked into Erza's eyes. "I asked specifically about him. Turns out he is Alive and breathing, his body intact. Which is a blessing in itself. This war has turned out to be the bloodiest yet. But he saved many lives while on duty. He is a fine medical officer. You should be proud of him."

Erza breathed through her mouth. Her lips quivered. She didn't know what to make of the situation or the news. He was… returning. She mostly didn't hear anything after that that was said.

Makarov nodded unsurely. Did he bring her relief with this news? Or had he opened old wounds in her heart? Wounds that should have remained closed and shut?

"I'll… I'll leave you to it, lad. Pick him up tomorrow. His carrier lands at the military base at 3:30 pm."

With that, Makarov sighed and knocked on the door. The door opened from the other side, and he left Erza alone in the room. With her thoughts. Her… tumultuous thoughts. Some painful, some nostalgic. Some… happy. Some bitter. His voice… from years ago, rang in her head.

"They are looking for medical officers in the army." He said. "For the final sweep. I am… uh… thinking of joining up."

Erza stood under the umbrella with him, holding it up, the rain splattering against the artificial cloth. But the umbrella went askew in her hand as she heard him say that. He didn't hesitate. His voice didn't shudder. He was telling the truth. This was no joke.

She had worried that this day would come. She had kept on telling herself that that it wouldn't, and that his unusual vested interest in the ongoing war would remain just that—a curious interest. For it to turn into this…?

Her red, bright and beautiful hair fell over her face as she lowered her head. The pink haired man stood half in the rain after the umbrella had started to lean off her hands, but he didn't care. The army would put him through much worse. He had to prepare himself.

Erza clenched her hands tighter around the umbrella handle.

"Join the army…. And then what? Turn up dead at my doorstep a few months later? Are you… are you out of your mind?"

The man stared at her face straight—her face that was hidden away behind the locks of her hair. She had always been so beautiful. So pretty. So simple. So… gorgeous. Even in grief—which he knew he was causing her right now, she still looked unbelievably attractive.

"I'll be fine. I'll be a medical officer. I'll mostly stay in the camps and behind the frontline. Don't worry about that."

Erza smirked. But her heart beat only with grief. And disappointment. And… pain. What was the cause of this pain? What was the reason behind this grief? The fact that he was leaving to join the bloodiest and the most brutal war of the century, where upwards to 1000s died each day and even more went missing? Was it the fact that he would eventually become one of those statistics? That… that the day she sees him off would be the last she would ever see of him?

"Your mother." She tried retorting. "What about her? Before she left… she left you in my charge. I promised your mother on her deathbed that I'll always look after you. No matter what happens, that I'll care for you. Does your mother mean nothing to you? Are you ready to throw her worries and her love for you out the window just like that?"

The man looked away. Erza was really testing his patience right now. Why bring his mother into this? Expecting that he'd fold? No. He wouldn't. He was made of sterner stuff yet.

"The dead are just that. Dead. It's the living that need me in this war right now—"

He halted as her hand clapped across his face. His head turned farther away, and the sting of the slap travelled across his cheek. That warmth in the stark weather of the cold rain felt… almost comforting.

There was silence. Natsu couldn't believe that she had slapped him. She had never even slapped him playfully before. He slowly turned his head back to face her. As soon as he did, the slight outrage and the majority shock in his mind dissipated.

Erza stared at him with a face full of hurt. As if she was the one that had been slapped. But… she looked like she was hurting way more than if she had only been slapped.

Tears… or rainwater? What was that flowing out of her eyes? No… it couldn't have been rainwater. She was standing under the umbrella—shielded. Tears it were.

"You dare disrespect your mother? The one who loved you the most in this world? All she ever wanted was for you to stay safe and healthy. Whenever you got into fights at school and got hurt, she'd come and shed tears to me. You'd just be off sleeping peacefully in your room. Whenever you got even minutely scratched, her eyes would fill up with tears. It was me! I saw her love for you. I saw her worry for you. You never cared about her anyway. If you did, you wouldn't be so persistent in walking towards your own death as you are right now! Don't you dare give me the 'my country needs me' bullshit! I know it's something else. Why? Why do you want to go to war so much? Tell me the truth! I deserve to know!"

Natsu's shock dissipated completely. All that was left was confusion. Why was she so hell bent on having him not go to war?

He exhaled, and his breaths turned into vapour in the cold.

"I could ask you the same thing." Natsu looked up again, shameless. He had decided he would go to war. No one could shake him now.

Erza stared at him in disbelief. There was no shame in him. Was this the man she had been friends with all along? Where was that cheery and happy fool that she had known all along? Where was the guy that was mortally afraid of her and wouldn't dare do anything that she denied him doing? Who was this in his place?

"What?" Erza asked, narrowing her teary eyes.

Natsu gulped, and clenched his teeth. He stood taller and more defiant. Erza couldn't shake him. His mother couldn't shake him. He wouldn't shake him. He had made up his mind.

"I said, I could ask you the same thing. Why are you so hell bent on keeping me from going? Don't give me the 'your mother wouldn't want it' bullshit. What is the real reason you don't want me going…?"

Erza stared at him for a while, and then looked down near her feet. She continued that, until her vision blurred and she could see nothing. She sobbed as she walked backwards away from him, leaving him in the pouring rain.

Erza sat in silence. Her heart aching. Bleeding. Pounding against her chest. She still remembered his face. His… beautiful face. Ripe with smiles and emotions. Was he still the same? Was he still that same man that she cared for like an unspoken family member? Her childhood friend? Or… had he changed?