Someone To Talk To

"Here, drink this." Punk said, walking over to the table where Daryl was sitting his shop, sitting down a hot mug of tea in front of him as he took a seat across.

"What is it?" Daryl sniffed, wiping his nose which still felt drippy after the many tears and sobs he'd let go of.

"Ginger tea." Punk said as Daryl look at him with confusion, "April drinks it when she's feeling anxious or worried about something. Says it helps her." He shrugged as Daryl nodded, picking the mug up and taking a sip.

"Tastes like curry." Daryl said, nudging the mug away from him as Punk scoffed.

"Just drink it." Punk shook his head as Daryl smiled a little, "How long they been happening? The panic attacks?" He asked.

"Few years. Pretty much when I went into prison." Daryl nodded, "They've gotten worse since I got out."

"Is something triggering you?" Punk asked, "Did something happen to you in prison?" He asked, figuring now wasn't the time to beat around the bush. It was beyond tiptoeing around Daryl now.

"Not anything traumatic." Daryl shrugged, "I had the odd fight. Everyone fought. I had a couple of rough cell mates, too. The guards weren't particularly nice. There'd always be a fight in the kitchen. One time this guy Ronnie, he was a piece of work, he got me with a sharpened toothbrush." He said, lifting his t-shirt as Punk looked at the scar at the bottom of his torso.

"Everything you've just said sounds pretty traumatic to me." Punk said.

"I just can't shake the feeling that I'm still there. Always looking over my shoulder or around the corner." Daryl said, "And I'm so paranoid. About everything. And then I panic about how the hell I'm supposed to figure out being a dad when I can't even look after myself." He shook his head.

"You're not going to feel better if you don't talk. It sounds cliché, I know. But it's true. A problem shared is a problem halved." He nodded.

"It's hard explaining it to someone who wasn't there." Daryl said, "I just punched Finn." He shook his head, placing his elbows on the table and burying his face in his hands.

"Why?" Punk asked, trying to stay calm.

"I don't know. He punched me first, but I deserved it. Got it in my twisted head that him and Shiv have been hooking up. I know they're probably not but… it's like in the moment I believed it. I start feeling like everyone is against me or talking about." He shook his head, "And then I hear Brianna saying how much she loves Finn's sandwiches and I know it's ridiculous but it just… it makes me mad cause… she knows Finn better than she knows me. I'm just a stranger to her." He said as Punk listened carefully.

"Ok, well… Shiv and Finn aren't hooking up. Finn has been dating someone." Punk told him as Daryl looked up from his hands, "He helps Shiv because she's on her own. She works all day and then takes care of Brianna. Sometimes I make Brianna her lunch… you think I'm sleeping with Shiv?" He raised a brow as Daryl scoffed, shaking his head.

"Whose Finn dating? He never said." Daryl said, feeling more and more like an asshole.

"Some girl from this cooking class he took in the Summer last year. I don't think anyone knows apart from me. You know how he is, keeps his life private, no matter how much I annoy him for information." Punk rolled his eyes as Daryl sighed.

"God, my head is just such a mess." Daryl groaned, "And Shiv… everytime I see her I… I get mad about her not telling me about Brianna, and then I miss her. I miss her when she's standing right in front of me. The fact her parents threw her out and she was… on her own. I wish I was there." He shook his head.

"Some things are out of your control, Daryl." Punk said, "It's what you do now that matters. It's how you move forward with your life. You can spend all day thinking about everything you missed, everything you should have done, but it won't change anything."

"Easier said than done." Daryl shook his head.

"I know, but talking to someone is a start. Talking to me, it's a start. I've always been here to listen." Punk assured him, "Finn mentioned the nightmares."

"Yeah. They're bad. They feel so real. Like I'm back in prison. Sometimes I wake up and I don't know where I am." Daryl said, "Drinking helps. It just knocks me out."

"Drinking doesn't help." Punk assured him, "Not in the long term. Just makes it worse. You'll come to depend on it so much, you won't realise you've turned into a full-blown alcoholic. I've watched it happen." He said as Daryl looked at him with confusion, "My dad."

"Oh." Daryl nodded, "I mean… I don't think I'm an alcoholic. Not yet anyway." He rolled his eyes as Punk smiled.

"I'll be dead before I watch you go down that road." Punk assured him, "You gotta talk. It's the only way. Why do you think they call it 'getting something of your chest'?" He asked.

"It's just embarrassing." Daryl shook his head.

"It's really not." Punk assured him, "It's certainly less embarrassing than showing up to work drunk, punching your best friend, fighting with your… with Shiv." He said as Daryl just nodded. He figured Punk had a point.

"I just spent so long with my guard up, I don't know how to get it down. I don't know how to be normal." Daryl said as Punk looked at him.

"There's someone I know that I think you should talk to." Punk said as Daryl looked at him worriedly.

"I'm not going to any counsellor or psychologist." Daryl shook his head.

"That's not who I mean." Punk said, "You trust me?" He asked as Daryl looked at him.

"Not after you made me drink whatever that is." Daryl pointed to the mug of tea as Punk smiled.

"C'mon. Let's go." Punk nodded to him.

"Ready or not, here I come!" AJ yelled, taking her hands from her eyes, standing in the kitchen, and wondering where three little munchkins would hide or more so, where they would fit, "I'm coming to get you guys!" She called.

She checked all around the kitchen first, in cupboards and under the table, she even checked the fridge. She wouldn't put anything past them, especially Rudy.

She moved onto the living room, looking around and noticing little feet sticking out from under the drapes at the window. She knew it was Thomas, mostly because he was terrible at this game, and also because of the Spiderman socks peeping through.

"I can see Spiderman socks." She hummed, watching the little feet disappear as she chuckled, "Got you." She pulled the drape back as Thomas groaned.

"Why do I always get caught first?" Thomas huffed, "I hate this game."

"Come on. You can help me find the girls now." AJ told him, "I think they're upstairs." She said, heading for the spiral staircase and walking up with Thomas at her heels.

"Mommy. Look." Thomas patted AJ's leg, pointing to a small shadow in the bathroom, coming from behind the door.

"Shh." AJ put her finger to her lips, walking towards the bathroom and pulling the door back, finding Brianna crouched down behind it.

"Found you!" Thomas yelled as Brianna squealed and giggled.

"Ok, one to go. Where is she at?" AJ smiled, looking in Rudy's bedroom first and then Thomas', but she wasn't there. Of course, she was hiding in her and Punk's bedroom.

"She must be in here." Brianna smiled excitedly, following AJ into the bedroom as they all paused and noticed a Rudy shaped bulge under her parent's bed covers. AJ laughed at the fact Rudy had clearly made the bed back up the way she found it, with the covers, pillows and cushions all on top of her.

"You know… I think I might lay down." AJ teased, "I'm really tired. I think I'll just dive right onto this bed." She said, running and jumping on top of Rudy, carefully of course.

"We found you!" Thomas yelled, running over and pulling the covers back where Rudy was lying under.

"But I win." Rudy pointed out as Thomas and Brianna jumped on top of her, happy to have found their last remaining contestant.

"Hey!" Punk called from downstairs, "Anybody here?" He asked.

"Daddy!" Rudy yelled excitedly, pushing everyone out the way and jumping off the bed as she headed for the stairs.

"Hey, you." Punk smiled, watching Rudy running towards him, lifting her up and hugging her tightly.

"You were gone so long today." Rudy said unhappily, "It's almost bedtime."

"I know. I'm sorry, sweetie. I was real busy at work." He told her.

"Well you missed playing hide and seek. I won." Rudy nodded.

Meanwhile Daryl stood behind Punk, just watching the interaction, wondering if Brianna would ever come running to him that way one day.

"Of course you won, my little champ." Punk kissed her head and put her back down on the ground whilst AJ eventually appeared with Thomas and Rudy.

"Hi, daddy." Thomas smiled.

"Hi, kiddo. You looking after these ladies?" Punk asked him, messing with his hair as Thomas laughed and nodded.

"Hi, daddy." Brianna smiled over to Daryl, copying the twins once she noticed Daryl was standing there.

"Hey." Daryl smiled nervously.

"Everything ok?" AJ asked, looking at Punk specifically. She'd picked up Brianna from pre-k and took her to their house because she knew Shiv was waiting for an update on where Daryl was, and now he was here in her house, looking dreadful with bloodshot eyes and a pale face.

"Yeah, can I talk to you for a second?" Punk asked AJ, nodding over to the kitchen.

"Yeah." AJ nodded, "Go watch something on the TV, guys." She told the kids before heading off to the kitchen with Punk.

"Come with us." Brianna smiled, walking over to Daryl and taking his hand, dragging him over to the sofa with them.

"What will we watch?" Rudy smiled, jumping onto the couch, "Not Spiderman." She turned to her brother sternly.

"Why not?" Thomas asked, "Do you like Spiderman?" He asked Daryl.

"Uh… yeah, I guess." Daryl nodded.

"Do you like my nails?" Brianna asked him quietly, sitting down beside him and showing him her nails, "Rudy painted them earlier." She said as Daryl looked at the messy pink painted nails.

"Oh, I love them." Daryl nodded, "Can I book in for an appointment?" He turned to Rudy, showing her his nails.

"Yes but five dollars in the piggy." Rudy smirked, "That's my price."

"The piggy is for curse words." Thomas told her.

Meanwhile Daryl looked over to where AJ and Punk were standing in the kitchen, having what appeared to be a serious conversation with lots of raised brows.

"Can we watch Trolls? I like that." Rudy nodded.

"Me too." Brianna added, "They have fun hair." She told Daryl who smiled.

He was in awe as he watched Thomas turn the TV on and work his way through the movie recordings. Modern technology and kids these days. He watched as the three of them got comfy, noticing Rudy and Thomas pulling the blanket off one another back and forth whilst Brianna sat focused on the TV.

It gave him a chance to really look at her, and for the first time, he saw Shiv. It almost took his breath away. They really made this little person. This beautiful, kind, sensitive little angel who clasped her hands and swung her legs back and forth as she watched the TV. Those traits were all Shiv. The bubbly personality, the caring and sensitive nature, the cute little giggle, and warm smile. It was all her. His best friend.

"Daryl." Punk called as Daryl turned away from Brianna, looking over to where Punk and AJ were standing at the doorway, confused to see AJ putting her coat on.

"We're watching Trolls." Daryl said, walking over to Punk and AJ.

"I hate that stupid movie." Punk rolled his eyes as Daryl chuckled.

"You wanna come for a walk with me?" AJ asked Daryl.

"I'm gonna drop Brianna off at Shiv's and get the kids to bed." Punk said, giving Daryl a reassuring nod, squeezing his shoulder on the way past to the living room where he dived between the kids and tormented them.

"Is this some kind of intervention?" Daryl asked AJ with confusion, "Or are you taking me on a walk to formally fire me from The Brewberry?" He asked as AJ smiled.

"I'm not firing you." AJ scoffed, "Come on." She said, opening up the front door and heading outside as Daryl followed with confusion.