"Celeste?"

"Hm?" I hummed quietly.

The rain was sheeting down at an angle against the house.

"You know I'm here for you… right?" Bella lays down beside me, I rested my head on her shoulder and looked up at the ceiling, crossing my arms over my torso.

"I've come to… realize that."

"You're not crazy, if that's what you've been thinking."

"I've been trying to think… at all, actually…"

"You can't choose to be ignorant forever… It'll make you bitter. I am dead, but I'm here, for a short period of time."

"A short time?" I sighed, "I don't want to believe you're dead. I don't want to believe he did it. I don't want to go flip out on Billy and Sam for not telling me the truth."

"The answers are here… in this room, Celeste."

…

My 16th birthday came.

Mom came in and woke me up around the time I was born, she laid down with me and then it was 2:26 am and the date is april 2nd , a Sunday. Then she told me the story about why she calls me sugar cookie, she was eating sugar cookies for days before she found out she was pregnant, she had thought I was going to be a boy until she had a dream about me being a boy and she knew I was a girl. That was a moment that made me realize that I had to cope better or try to at least, I was loved. There had to be something that I could do.

Just something.

I released the most obnoxious sigh to fill the silence of the house of a Saturday afternoon with my parents out of on a little date. They're adorable. But I am bored, I don't want to watch tv, Dad is still banning me from going outside because of his sightings while patrolling of large animals in the woods and crossing the street. The stories from him or in school. The kids in school were surprisingly more dramatic than my stoic father when he gets all red and flustered. One kid in school said one—this one was silver shaded grey wolf—had 'walked rather casually like in a confident stride' and just focused its task on the forest on the other side. I thought they were rather harmless, no one said anything about them attacking them, someone of the kids said they just stared sometimes like they got a kick out of their freakouts afterwards. Intelligent animals, they have a sense a humor. He still enforced the rule of o outside while they were gone and after school hours, it was… ugh… I felt like I was missing something with the wolves, and I was an idiot for not figuring out what it is.

I dreamt about a nameless and colorless book the night before; it was the shape of one but nothing. I pondered over it; I wondered if there was any other hidden details. All I remember was the book. This drove me crazy for a while. It wasn't like I could go outside and drive anyway to find a book. Online shopping was no assistance with the ancient computer, and its lag, but whatever. Shopping in person is better anyways; maybe I needed to attempt to get out. Mom's been wanting to go shopping in Port Angeles, so why not, I just needed my truck back. I don't want another car, but I'll save up for one if I absolutely needed too.

This last week in school, I was asked out by a junior. I forget his name, and if I had to be honest, I didn't care about him. I care about him enough to let him die by Edward, but I didn't care about him to… like him more than that. So, I rejected him, I couldn't let him into my world, and I also just lead the boy on either.

The end of the school year was closer than ever. There were days I would find the boys walking with Sam and his group, or just the three of them. There were days when I would see those wolves from in my dreams in the forest. There were in the forest in my backyard, or I would see glimpses of them through the think brush while riding in the car with Mom, and sometimes during school. They didn't seem to care or acknowledge that there were vampires in the woods, it terrified me down my core to know that they were always in the wood.

I was terrified that one day the school would be alerted about their disappearances or even their deaths. I was terrified for their lives, their very souls. I don't care if they didn't want to be my friends anymore, I didn't want them to die. They were too good to die at the hands of Edward and Victoria.

Seth and Leah Clearwater had stopped coming to school and had apparently also joined Sam's 'cult' which was a consistent mention throughout the school. Most of the kids in school would recognize me in school, they'd either ask me questions about my trio of 'friends with benefits' or they'd bully me about being friends with druggies. The kids at school only had that one insult about all of them being on drugs because of their bizarre changes and behaviors whenever someone would confront them. I never entertained their antics and words, I just wanted to go through my school day without getting into verbal sparring match with these fucking annoying ass students.

They getting on my fucking nerves, it would be a God send to hold onto my patience and to hold my tongue but every passing day it was getting harder and harder to ignore the fact that these kids were relentless on tormenting me.

I have calmed down from my previous and only mental breakdown. Especially after being scolded by Charlie for my emotional tantrum. My parents' relationship went rocky after arguments about my condition, those arguments turned into blaming insults about Bella and her disappearance. They argued about Dad forcing me into psychological therapy and medication, Dad spent more time at the station that he was home. I didn't object, I couldn't object to it; I wanted peace and maybe psychological analyzation could help with that. Dad found my truck and he had it sent to someone to get worked on, to at least get it running and have it last until Dad had enough money to buy me another one.

He didn't want me to work yet, he wanted me to enjoy this year and focus on school before starting to work next year during junior and senior year of high school. His main reasons for not wanting me to work was because when Bella was my age, Dad and Renee had been going through one of their many fights and the bills were slipping because of Renee's flighty trips and benders. He wanted me to enjoy these years, he didn't want me to worry about money and the house, he just wanted to be able to send me off the college with a proud grin. I couldn't argue with him, I didn't want to argue with him about it.

My nightmares tormented me every night and it always ended with me screaming and locked in a night terror about Edward and Victoria kidnapping me and torturing me. Those wolves were always in my night terrors, trying to protect me and eliminate the threat of vampires. There were most nights when I would refuse to sleep because of my fear of reliving my night terrors over and over again. Bella greeted me every morning. I woke to her hazy form either standing at the end of bed or lying beside me, she followed me everywhere and talked to me like she was alive. I accepted her presence with grace, I talked to her when I was in the safety of my room, and she always responded. She was the only one that gave me comfort.

Was I ever going to feel normal again? Was I ever not going to be afraid to live my life because of my past? I hadn't produced a resolve to those questions over the next few weeks.

Bella sat in the passenger seat as I drove to Forks with the radio playing. The night was clear, calm, the stars in the darkening sky was popping out, a light breeze swept through the highway and streets.

I sighed as I parked Mom's car in the parking lot of Forks High for my participation in the track meet and its bonfire. I got my usual for food, cheese fries and a hot dog, I added a water bottle with my small meal, I sat at one of the nearly empty picnic table, I glanced down at the laughing Forks/La Push students as they conversed about normal teenage parallels. I ate half of my hotdog and a quarter of my fries before I gave up and went to find a seat to settle for the game.

The night air was warm and chilly, colling off the warmth temperature of the late May day. I sat down the cold bleachers, Bella sat down beside me—I have been trying me hardest not to acknowledge her in public, but she's been making it ridiculously hard lately—and observed the rivaling track meets as they prepared for the race. I wished that Jacob, Embry and Quil were here, I wished that they never left school for them to be here with me to spend this time together. I hated being alone, it was too quiet all of the time.

I jumped at the sound of laughing kids and a boy I recognized from my health class on my first day of school, I stared after him bewildered when he kissed me cheek and scurried away with his group of friends cackling like hyenas before following him off the bleachers towards the prepping of the bonfire off to the far left of the bleachers and the track. I glanced around as the speculators of the childish act, giggling and murmuring, some parents gave me understanding glances as their children murmured to them.

I began to regret coming tonight. But it was good that I was out on a Friday night, I have been spending my nights after school and/or the weekends locked away in my room and talking to my hallucination of Bella. Bella giggled beside me and nudged her shoulder into mine. I went rigid not to react to her, the talk going around would instantly change if I looked over at the empty space next to me and started talking to thin air. That talk was greatly unnecessary and would be a blow to my parents.

I looked around at the speakers around the football field as they began to play music. The Heartland album that was on replay in the truck or our stereo, especially this song; I had figured it was sort of way of coping with the event in Pheonix. I recognized the song immediately, my body went frozen as the first verse began to pour from the speakers, Bella disappeared next to me in a cloud of mist as a gust of wind blew over me.

"It get in your eyes, it's making you cry. Don't know what to do, don't know what to do
You're looking for love, calling heaven above," I felt my chest begin to shake like a set of fireworks were about to explode from my chest. "Send me an angel! Send me an angel right now, right now…"

"Celeste." Bella says in a distant echo down on the pavement where it was blocked off from the track, beckoning me, her tone had said it all.

And then I dashing down the stairs of the bleachers, the music got louder which made the bystanders anxious. I got sight of the staff that was responsible for the controls of the speakers and the lights, the overhead lights were flickering and causing anxiety, they were confused by the looks of it. I didn't waste any time, they didn't know what this was, but I did. If I was sane to remember Bella listening to this song on repeat in the impending weeks of her death. Her spirit was alive and stronger than ever, something was coming, and I knew that being here surrounded my people was going to bring danger to them all. Something was coming and I knew that I couldn't waste any time in getting back on La Push soil.

I wasn't the only one that was retreating to their vehicles, I looked back at the field hearing the song cut off and the stark brightness of the lights functionally correctly. That was definitely Bella, it was just the warning she gave me in the station, but this is severely different.

This was a different type of warning. I raced back to La Push as fast as I could drive without causing and getting into an accident. I glanced at the radio and the road swiftly when the offline radio turned on and continued the song from where it was cut off in Forks. Bella appeared in the passenger seat, I glanced over at her and then she frowned.

"Mom's not staying." She says looking forward and playing with a strand of hair.

I looked back forward, I inhaled through my nose and kept myself focused on the road, "I kind of figured that already."

"It's in the air. Did you see her ring? I didn't see it on her finger this morning."

"She was cleaning the bathroom."

"Do you remove your jewelry when you clean?"

"Me and mom are different. I only remove it if it's in danger of being snagged and lost while cleaning, so yes I do. Why is this important? Can I turn the radio now?"

She sighs, "Fine. But she didn't put it back on when she was done."

"She's leaving. You already said that, I agreed. Can I turn the radio on?"

"Right. I'm sorry she's leaving."

"Everything cannot be about me and my feelings on certain situations, especially all of the time. I'm trying to deal in my own way. Your gone, it makes everything harder."

"I'm here. I've been here."

"As a hallucination. I fragmentation of my own brain."

"You were there. You weren't the only one who was there and was running away… Celeste… I don't know what happened when I… I don't know how I'm here but all I know is waking up just like this, trapped behind a barrier… In your sleep, I was able to get to you, you were in your own nightmare wanting to find me… I wanted to help you. I thought you would figure it out by now."

"Wait, wait, if you can do weird shit electricity and materialize to me? Why…. Why do you do that?"

"It was to get stronger I guess."

"I don't understand. I honestly think I'm going insane."

"It's something with science you wouldn't understand. Energy, theory of other worlds, alternate dimensions, black holes."

"Oh, stop! Nerd, silence. Please, my head hurts."

"I'm sorry. It's just… energy and spirits go along with it. I want you to have clarity. I want him to… I want him to stop existing… if it's possible."

"Huh?"

"He lied to me. He killed me, he hurt me. No matter how much I love him, I can't accept the fact he brought harm to me… causing harm to family presently. He played everything like a twisted game, changed me, changed my views, morals, standards, desires for the world, scared me subconsciously and glad he couldn't hear me. I see it now; there's a lot of things I've been able to do since being on this alternate dimension, but I have to be laid to rest for everything to settle on my end. Edward… Edward is going to be a challenge."

"Clearly."

"Are you willing to be crazy for just a bit longer?"

"I don't believe I have a choice."

She shook her head with a sheepish smile until she giggled softly, "I'm sorry."

I rolled my eyes, smirking, "Whatever. Prince is on." I turned the dial for the volume a tad.

"You know… if the highway lanes were closer together, you would be considered crazy by three families already."

I snorted, "Like that would be a surprise so far. You'd have to be crazy to have a full-on conversation with whatever is going on right now… at least Edward isn't here."

"Don't jinx it."

"You didn't even need to acknowledge it."

"Yeah but you just put it out in the physical world first. What if he is around, idiot."

"I thought your show was the warning he was already around."

"No… I wanted to talk to you. Why did you go to that? That was boring."

"Nothing actually started yet."

"There was supposed to be a bonfire."

"Wait, so Edward isn't around?"

"No. Why?"

"We're going to the bonfire, and you be quiet and do not draw attention to me. I mean it. I want tp see the bonfire… if they're still doing it."

"One of the guys took blame for it for having his music player plugged in. He had the song."

"You know, the lights were extreme. I would've taken the hint with the music."

"Not really."

"You're dramatic."

"They were stealing your attention."

"I need human social interaction and being involved in school functions even in the crowd, is required for college."

She sighed, "But why tonight."

"You're jealous, jealous."

"A little."

"Okay, well, you're going to enjoy the bonfire. You have to be quiet."

"I heard you the first time."

The high school parking lot was half full as the streets of Forks were heavy in traffic because of the change of plans, and Bella's spiritual jealous outburst. Bella followed me as I walk towards the lit bonfire and the laughing participants with the echo of the announcer on the speakers giving the play by plays of the track meet. To glance over at Bella, I made it look like I was checking out the forest behind us, Bella was looking at the bonfire with a content smile of her face. Her brown eyes were reflecting the fire light, and it brightened her pale skin, I looked around to the other side of the forest and looked up at the sky.

It was a beautiful night. I sat down on one of the logs they cut seats into and indulged in the bonfire for as long as I could, for as long as I could before heading home and going into my lonely room. Before I had to go home to a lonely house. I thought about the book I dreamed about again. God, I feel so stupid for not knowing what it is. It's starting to drive me up a wall and bald.

"Hey."

I looked up to my left where a brunette boy with green eyes shining and bonfire dancing around the green depths. He smiled at me like he lost his breath for a second. He likes me. Another boy I was going to have turn away at the end of this night.

"Hi." I smiled back, politely.

"Jesse, you?" He flashes me a crooked smile and held out his hand to me for a handshake, he's got a splash of dark freckles along his nose and cheekbones. He's cute, really cute. Not cute, he's a different kind of handsome.

His is playboy handsome, fit like a jock, and straight brown hair that was styled but also loose. I'd entertain him with conversation just for tonight. He was great eye candy.

I shook his hand and replied, "Celeste."

"It's pretty, huh? Or is it inviting?" He sits down in Bella's place making her vanish into blue mist, he gestured over the bonfire with his bag of fries.

I glanced back at the bonfire, confused. I must have zoned out gazing at the fire for him to mention the latter. Maybe he came to sit my me to make sure I wouldn't fling myself in it. I may be just a bit suicidal but not enough to be fantasizing about flinging myself into hell. I'm trying to survive hell.

"Oh, it's pretty. Just thinking."

"Penny for your thoughts?" He asks, popping fries into his mouth.

I shrugged, I pulled my sleeves over my hands and fingers, "Just school."

He scoffs in amusement, "It's the weekend."

"True. I got my end of the year finals this week coming up."

"You don't go to Forks High?" He asks, scanning my face like he was trying to figure out who I was.

"Not since December." I replied, "You go to Forks?"

"Yeah." He glances around at the other people hovering around the logs, grass and around the bonfire, "I just moved here in April."

"Oh, welcome." I smiled, chuckling nervously.

I didn't know if I should be talking to him. It was a sudden unsettling feeling sinking into my gut.

"Thanks." He smiles again, "Do you… want to go watch the meet?"

I had an even more disturbing feeling settling in my stomach, I looked at my watch on my wrist. It was only getting to nine, but I could make something up.

"I uh…" I looked up at him and my watch, "I actually have to get home soon."

"A drink or something, then? I promise not to keep you that long."

I shook my head and gave him an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry. I got to go actually."

"Okay," Jesse says, he gives me a small smile as he stands up, "See you around, Miss. Bennett." He tipped an imaginary cap at me with that smile widening across his face and he walked away towards the bleachers and the field.

I didn't understand what he meant by that. Miss Bennett? Like from Pride and Prejudice? That's a new one. I didn't feel prideful over myself. I feel like my life was falling apart before my eyes over and over again.