Chapter 43The phone call

The wind howled against the house, rattling the windows like unseen hands trying to claw their way inside.

Charlie hadn't been gone five minutes before Bella's phone rang.

She flinched. Not out of surprise she had expected it sooner.

Outside, the sky had darkened drastically, storm clouds swallowing what little daylight remained. The approaching storm pressed down on her, thick and suffocating.

Or maybe that feeling wasn't just the storm.

Her stomach twisted as she pulled the sleek black device from her pocket. She had barely gotten used to carrying it. A week ago, Edward had pressed it into her hand with an insistence that left no room for argument.

"You need this," he had said. "In case you need to reach me."

She had rolled her eyes. "What's the point? You're always with me."

"Almost always," he muttered grumply. "I just want to make sure you're safe."

Now, with thunder rumbling in the distance, the phone buzzed in her hand. She exhaled slowly.

Edward hadn't hunted in over a week and a half. He needed to go soon. He had to know that. But instead of taking care of himself, he was checking on her… again.

Her thumb hovered over the decline button. She could turn it off. Pretend she hadn't heard it, but she wouldn't. Not after last time.

A sharp gust of wind sent a branch scraping against the window, an eerie, grating sound that made her stomach churn. It reminded her of another sound. The sickening noise when they tore Victoria and Riley apart. Her mind flashed to something worse; an image she couldn't unsee.

Edward, broken and scattered. His body nothing more than disassembled pieces. Edward, who was always so composed, so untouchable, had been in pieces. Literally.

He had looked wrong like that. Like the universe had made a mistake letting him break at all. And the worst part? The Cullens had put him back together with practiced ease. Like it was routine. That thought unsettled her most of all.

Even now, the memory sat heavy in her chest, a dull ache of guilt pressing in. She knew it hadn't been her fault… not really… but that didn't stop the thoughts.

What if she had just gone home?
What if she had listened to Alice?
What if…?

She closed her eyes. No. She wasn't going to think about that. But she did. Because deep down, she had failed him. And yet… she also knew this was his own doing. His choice. He had crossed the line. He had been warned. Still, she loathed the idea of placing any blame on him.

Loud thunder shook the walls, pulling her out of her thoughts.

"You gonna answer that, or are we pretending you're not home?" Leah asked from the couch, flipping through channels like none of this was out of the ordinary.

I'm home. The thought came before she could stop it. She wasn't sure what unsettled her more, the truth in it or the way Leah had said it so easily, like there was no question. No doubt. Like home was here. Her chest tightened. How many times had she thought that herself? How many times had she been here, curled up on the old couch, laughing at Jacob's stupid jokes, listening to Billy's stories and felt more at home than she ever had anywhere else?

"I'm not home." She said to Leah, but mostly, she said it to herself.

She exhaled sharply. "Yeah," she muttered. "Just… needed a minute."

Her thumb hovered over the screen. Just once. Just this once, she could let it ring. But she couldn't. Not after last time. Jaw tight, she pressed talk and brought the phone to her ear, already bracing herself.

"Edward," she said, gripping the phone a little tighter.

"Bella, love." His voice was both relieved and panicked. "You need to come home. There's a storm."

"I know about the storm, Edward."

"Good. Then you know it's imperative that you return home now."

"No, Edward, I'm not driving…"

I should have gone home. No. No, stay strong. He won't do that again. He promised.

"Yes, yes, you're right. You shouldn't drive. Have Jacob take you to the treaty line. I'll drive you from there."

"No, Edward. I'm not going home tonight."

Lightning flashed. The house lights flickered. A beat of silence.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I'm staying in La Push."

"No." Edward said it like she had asked for permission.

Don't give in. Don't give in.

Bella clenched her jaw. "Yes."

"No. You need rest, Bella," Edward insisted. "Proper care…"

"I need time with my friends," she interrupted. "I need this, Edward."

Another pause. The rain picked up, hammering against the windows. Bella pressed her fingers into her temples. She could feel the weight of his concern, his frustration at not being in control.

"You have friends here," he finally said.

Bella's grip on the phone tightened. "Edward, I need time."

She let the words settle, their weight pressing against her chest. Against his silence. Thunder rumbled through the house.

"Time?" Edward echoed, his voice so soft she almost didn't hear it.

"Yes." She inhaled deeply. "I need time." Away from his hovering, from the suffocating fear of messing up, from the crushing weight of always having to be something fragile, something that needed to be protected, managed, controlled. She needed to breathe.

"Time for what, Bella?" His voice was still gentle, but there was something underneath it. Something unraveling.

"Time with these friends." she repeated. "For myself,"

The line went completely silent. Outside, thunder cracked violently, shaking the walls. When Edward finally spoke, his voice had changed. It was flat, devoid of emotion.

"Put Jacob on the phone."

Bella closed her eyes, already aggravated, and handed the phone to Jacob.

He smirked as he answered, "What is it, leech?"

Bella groaned. He shot her a teasing smile, he knew she'd want to hear the conversation, so he saved them both the trouble and put the phone on speaker.

"Make sure she eats," Edward ordered. "She needs full meals; proteins, healthy fats, proper nutrients. No junk. She should have at least…"

Bella opened her mouth, ready to snap at him for treating her like some fragile, incompetent child, but Jacob pressed a finger to her lips, shaking his head with a knowing grin.

Then, with exaggerated innocence, he asked, "Should I walk her to bed, too? Heat up, err, I mean freeze, a water bottle for her to sleep with?"

Edward's voice sharpened. "Jacob Black, so help me, if you do not take proper care of her, I will…"

Jacob let out a low chuckle. "Oh, what, glare at me from the shadows like some brooding gothic hero?"

Edward's voice dropped to a dangerous whisper. "Take any form, drive me mad! … I will have it back; and I'll have his gold too; and then his blood; and hell shall have his soul!"

Jacob's smirk faltered. He lifted an eyebrow at Bella. He wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what this was. A threat, wrapped up in theatrics.

Knowing she was already stressed, he decided not to make it worse. Instead, he scoffed, shaking his head. "Wow, you really are the king of melodrama, aren't you? No wonder Bella likes you. She's got a thing for tragic idiots."

Bella yanked the phone away and ended the call, ignoring Jacob's smug expression.

Leah groaned from across the room. "You're dating a psychopath, Swan. Seriously, what is wrong with you?"

The phone rang again. She didn't know if she was annoyed or relieved she wouldn't have to rebut Leah's comment.

"Edward," she answered again.

"You should just come home," he insisted.

"How about I stay here and you take this time to hunt." Bella suggested.

Edward's silence seemed to stretch between them, heavy and unyielding. When he finally spoke, his voice was flat, devoid of emotion. "I'll hunt when I need to."

"Edward, please… I love you. I just need…"

"Time. Yes, I heard you." His voice was hollow, empty in a way that made her chest ache.

"Edward." Bella hesitated, the urge to give in, to just go home, pressing down on her.

"I'll see you in the morning, Bella." His voice was final, and then the line went dead.

Bella clenched her fists. Her stomach twisted painfully. "This is a mistake," she whispered.

Jacob heard her. He always did. "What is?" he asked, more serious now.

"Staying here." she said, wrapping her arms around herself.

Jacob swallowed hard "Why?"

Bella hugged herself tighter, "I'm upsetting him."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "He'll survive one night without you."

Her voice was small. "What if he leaves?"

From her spot on the couch, Leah let out a scoff. "Good." What else had she expected from Leah? The wolf girl thought Edward was a psychopath. Or was she just being facetious? She wasn't sure she cared at this moment.

Jacob sighed, gently uncrossing her arms and taking her hands in his. His thumbs brushed over her palms, his brows drawn together. He swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing, tension evident in the set of his shoulders.

"He won't."

"What if he…" all the things that could possibly go wrong ran rampant through her mind.

"Nothing bad is going to happen." he assured her.

She wanted to believe him. Needed to. But that gnawing fear refused to let go, tightening around her ribs like a vice. Still, she stayed.