The shepherd dogs
One night there was a brawl in the pub. A very heavily pregnant Maria had stepped in and resolved it with firm words. He had noticed Lilah standing nearby, for the first time having abandoned her little corner. Maria didn't need a bodyguard. She had a very annoyed Tommy next to her for that. And then it occurred to him. She wasn't there to intervene for Maria. She was there to intervene if those two mindless guys went completely off the rails and make an example.
"You are to keep the order around here. Is that why Maria doesn't care if you break the rules yourself?" he had asked when he found her, his voice harsh.
"Would you really care if your dog barked and howled, as long as you were sure that it would keep the flock in order with whatever means necessary?"
"So you are the enforcer."
He looked at the ground. His distrust in the world fuelling his thoughts. Was something more sinister going on in Jackson? Had he blindly trusted Tommy while he knew that he could be easily manipulated, mainly by women? Was he, himself, spending a night every week enjoying the rush of a drug and the company of a person next to him, the very person who knew all of it and he hadn't asked the right questions?
"No. I am the shepherd dog, making sure that no sheep stray and no wolves get in here. That's it," she replied more sharply, even offended.
"And you do that in the name of honour?" he raised an eyebrow in irony.
"There is no honour for thieves. And that's what I am. But I can at least try for some decency, right?" she shot back, "It's probably the most useful thing I have done in all my life."
He balanced her words.
"I am the emergency plan. I was never 'required', let's put it that way. Take it or leave it, I don't care. You are not fucking stupid. You can tell for yourself."
He softened and sat next to her as usual.
"Sorry," he murmured.
She took a drag and passed him the cigarette.
"Maria is a good leader and she wants good people here," she carried on in a calmer tone, "But she also isn't stupid. She knows people can be deceitful. She knows that the best of places have fallen because things spiralled from a bad seed and someone got muscle. So she got that too."
"It's people," he murmured, "No trust can be placed upon them…"
"Someone sounds like he survived the Apocalypse," another dry joke again.
"I got by."
"Bloody DA's, you know. They want to get the guilty fair and square but they will always like the cop who will break the rules and beat up the guy without marks to make their case. Why do you think she kept you?"
He turned his eyes towards her. She raised her eyebrows to him. Well, he knew the answer.
About to say something Lilah touched his hand. It was a move out of instinct. A move that people used to do casually. Probably not her. Her lips froze for a second. She almost pulled her hand back. But then she let it stay, more certain, more deliberate.
"Ellie is safe. The people here are actually good people, better than both of us. It's the best place I have seen coming all the way from the West Coast and probably the best you have, coming from the east. We are just the shepherd dogs to be unleashed if needed to keep it that way, Joel."
Given her consideration, her touch, his name on her lips for the very first time, he moved before really thinking. He turned his palm and caught her hand in his. He wasn't the type to do that casually either. She didn't flinch. She didn't pull it away. She just looked at their fingers with an unreadable expression.
It was a strange thing, to hold onto someone, not in violence or urgency, but just because.
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