So, back in November of 2023, I watched Star-Storm Animation's "Heathers in a Nutshell" video, and it labeled the song "Candy Store" as "The best song in the musical, even though it was ruined by Riverdale". Out of curiosity, I decided to watch the Riverdale Candy Store scene, and I didn't think it was that bad. The comments in said video were just people making fun of the choreography, how they skip certain parts of the song, and the actors' singing (which in the case of the latter, isn't as bad as people make it out to be.)
One thing that caught my eye was the super obvious tension between two of the characters, who I would later learn are Cheryl and Toni. I was interested in what was happening between them, and I wanted to know what was even happening in general.
When I learned I could watch Riverdale on Netflix, I started watching it from the very first episode, and needless to say, I was hooked. I fell in love with the world, the mysteries, and the characters.
A lot of people say that the show was plain bad after season 1, but I disagree. I did start noticing the flaws during season 2, and ESPECIALLY season 3 with all the cult stuff, though a lot of it was with help from the videos by Alex Meyers, Super Eyepatch Wolf, and Friendly Space Ninja (which you should check out if you haven't already).
They all had valid points. There are so many twists that have no real impact on the story and only exist for the sake of including a plot twist. The characters have inconsistent motives, get away with a lot of stupid things, and have no real character development (in the early seasons at least).
And like I mentioned before, the season 3 finale left me unsatisfied to the point where I wasted New Years 2024 rewriting said finale.
A month after writing that, I started watching season 4, and that also left me with a sense of dissatisfaction. I mean, we waste the whole season waiting for a death that's so obviously not gonna happen.
Seasons 5 and 6 were more entertaining than season 4 by a longshot. A lot of people make fun of the supernatural aspect of those seasons, but I actually found it entertaining. It might just be because I'm a sucker for the supernatural (I mean, just LOOK at my profile), but I definitely got some entertainment out of that.
But then, there was season 7, the final season of Riverdale. The first episode had me hooked, like always, but the moment I finished season 6, I knew it felt more like a series finale than what the ACTUAL series finale would be, and, well, I was right. Season 7 felt so disconnected from the rest of the show. I still enjoyed it, but I think I would've enjoyed it more if it was its own thing.
When I was pretty early into season 7, I got some ideas for a rewrite of the series as a whole, not just a single episode, starting with making season 6 the actual finale. Because of that, I deleted the original one-shot from my profile.
I only wanted to do this more when they ended the series by revealing that Tabitha fused the timelines, wiping the original 6 seasons, and all of the Riverdale spinoff shows like Katy Keene and The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, from existence.
Anyway, this is a big enough introduction (it's literally taken up the entire first page of my Google doc). So, without further ado, on with the story.
Riverdale belongs to Roberto Aguirre-Sacassa.
Play "Tell Me" by Johnny Jewel
Our story is about a town, a small town, and the people who live in the town, and work there, and fall in love there, get married, have children, and yes, even die there.
From a distance, or from the window of a train rushing by, it presents itself like so many other small towns all around the world. Safe, decent, innocent.
But that's only how people want it to be, or think it is because they're young and don't know any better.
At a certain point, you look close enough, and you start seeing the shadows underneath.
The name of this town is Riverdale, the town with pep.
Tell me, I'm your baby, and you'll never leave me
Tell me that you'll kiss me forever
Our story begins, I guess, with what the Blossom twins did this summer. On the fourth of July, just after dawn, Jason and Cheryl Blossom drove out to Sweetwater River for an early morning boat ride.
"Are you scared, Jason?" asked Cheryl.
Jason simply shook his head.
Cheryl got on the boat while Jason pushed it into the water. When the time was right, he jumped in.
Whisper that you love me, that you'll never leave me
Be mine, for always, I'll be yours forever
The next thing we know for sure is that Dilton Doiley, who was leading Riverdale's boy scout troop on a bird-watching expedition, came upon Cheryl by the river's edge, but no Jason.
There was water all over her hair and clothes. Makeup dripped down her eyes.
"Jason," was all she could say before she collapsed.
Riverdale police dragged Sweetwater River for Jason's body, but never found it.
"If he did die, Hal," Alice Cooper told her husband, Hal. "I hope he suffered during his last moments. May Jason Blossom burn in hell."
Tell me, I'm your baby, and you'll never leave me
Tell me that you'll kiss me forever
So, a week later, the Blossom family buried an empty casket, and Jason's death was labeled an accident, as the story Cheryl told made the rounds.
The story that Cheryl dropped a glove in the water, Jason reached down to get it, accidentally tipped the boat, and drowned, which is super weird because Jason was captain of almost every sports team at Riverdale High, including water polo.
Not that anyone examined those facts too closely, or asked too many questions. See, the Blossoms had their tendrils wrapped around the entire town. No one wanted to make enemies of them.
End "Tell Me"
As for the rest of the town, they were still talking about the 'July Fourth Tragedy' on the last day of summer vacation, when a new mystery rolled into town.
Veronica Lodge, a fifteen-year-old Latino girl with long, dark brown hair, got out of the taxi cab. She wore nothing but a worn-down T-shirt and shorts. The only fancy thing about her was the pearl necklace she wore around her neck.
In front of her was an apartment complex labeled, 'The Pembrooke'.
"Now brace yourself," Veronica's mother, Hermione, warned. "The apartment's small, but…"
"Quality always," Veronica interrupted, knowing where this was going.
"Plus, it's the only piece of property in my name and not your father's."
The two entered the apartment. An elderly man wearing a security uniform was waiting for them.
"Miss Hermione, welcome home," he greeted.
"Smithers," Hermione smiled. "You're a sight for sore eyes."
"How was the ride?"
"Not terrible, thank God. Smithers, I'd like to introduce to you, my daughter, Veronica."
Smithers shook Veronica's hand. "It's a pleasure, miss." He turned back to Hermione. "I'll get you the bags. Oh, and would you like some menus, so you can order in?"
"Oh no. I've been craving Pop Tate's burgers since noon. Is his Chock'lit Shoppe still open?"
"What is a 'Chock'lit shoppe', and why does it sell burgers?" Veronica asked curiously.
Play "Can't Get Enough of Myself" by Santigold
I can't get enough of myself
If I wasn't me, I can be sure I'd wanna be
I'm pretty major and I'll say it out loud
Betty Cooper, a girl with blonde hair in a ponytail, was getting dressed for a special date.
"Are you excited, nervous?" asked her friend, Kevin Keller.
"Both," Betty replied excitedly. "I've been waiting for this moment all summer."
"Which is why nerves are acceptable, but we agreed, Betty. It's time. You like him, and he likes you."
Living a, living a fantasy
Living in, I live in my vanity
Hey Mom, hey do you see me now?
Kevin looked out the window. "Oh my god!"
"What?" Betty asked.
"Come see for yourself!"
Betty ran to the window and what she saw made her blush brightly.
I call what I see, and I judge by my selfie
Look at my neighbors, I'm the best thing around
From her window, Betty could see the house of her next-door neighbor, and her boyfriend, Archie Andrews. More specifically, she could see the window to Archie's room.
Living a, living a fantasy
Living in, I live in my vanity
Hey Mom, hey do you see me now?
Archie Andrews himself just came into that room. His short, red hair glimmered in the light of his room. He had no shirt on, exposing his nipples, pecs, and six brand new abs.
In other words, Archie got hot.
"Six more reasons for you to take that ginger bull by the horns tonight," Kevin remarked.
End "Can't Get Enough of Myself"
Archie and Betty went to the focal point of Riverdale, Pop's Chock'lit Shoppe. They both sat at one of the available tables.
"So, what was the highlight?" Archie asked.
"Of my internship?" Betty assumed. "The Toni Morrison book release party I organized, by far. At the end of the night, Toni Morrison, who is, as you know, my literary hero, tells me, 'Don't rush this time, Betty. It goes by so fast at your age. One summer can change everything.'"
"Wow. That's so true."
"How was working for your dad?"
"It was, you know, pouring concrete, all day every day. To pass the time, I would occasionally run back and forth, and it made me feel like…" Archie hesitated to continue.
Betty got a little impatient. "What, Archie?"
"It made me feel like I finally broke through something real, about my life and what I should be trying to do with it. Football, starting this year, tomorrow."
"Amazing. Have you told your dad?"
"No. Until I get it all figured out, you're the only one I'm telling."
"Well, I'd love to see you on the field. Also, I've been thinking about us, Archie, and our relationship, and I think it's…"
Before Betty could finish that statement, someone else entered the diner. She was a brunette Latino girl wearing casual clothes. Archie's attention diverted away from Betty to this new girl.
"I called in an order for Lodge," she told Pop.
"Two burgers, almost ready," Pop assured. "But you gotta wait."
Pop headed towards the kitchen. The new girl noticed Archie and Betty.
"Hi," she greeted.
"Hey," Archie replied, almost choking on his own words.
"How is the food here?"
"So good."
"Awesome. My mom and I just moved her, so…"
"From where?"
"New York."
"Wow."
"Do you guys go to Riverdale High?"
"Yeah, we're both sophomores."
Betty nodded in confirmation.
"Cool, me too," the new girl smiled. "I'm filled with dread."
"Why is that?" asked Archie.
"Are you familiar with the works of Truman Capote?"
Archie and Betty nodded.
"I'm 'Breakfast at Tiffany's', but this place is strictly in 'Cold Blood'."
Archie laughed at the new girl's joke, while Betty just sat there, confused.
"Veronica Lodge," the girl introduced herself.
"Archie Andrews," Archie shook Veronica's hand before gesturing to Betty. "And this is Betty Cooper."
Veronica recognized the name. "Wait, are you…?"
"Supposed to give you the tour tomorrow?" Betty asked. "Yes. I'm your peer mentor."
"Do you want to join us?" Archie suggested. "Maybe we can un-fill your dread."
Veronica sadly shook her head. "My mom's waiting for me, but thanks anyway."
Right as Veronica left, Archie remembered Betty wanted to say something.
"What were you gonna say?" he asked her.
Betty knew the moment was ruined, so she simply said, "Nothing."
Pop handed the two a burger and a set of fries for each of them. Betty took the burger and started eating it.
The next morning, Archie rushed down the stairs while putting on his backpack.
"Dad, it's the first day of school and I'm already late!" he said. "I'll eat breakfast on the way!"
Once he was down the stairs, he took a quick stop to pet his dog, Vegas. After that, he grabbed his breakfast and headed for the door.
"Hey, you stopping by the site later?" asked Fred Andrews, Archie's dad.
"Dad, it's my first day," Archie replied.
"Oh, we gotta get you going in the office, so next summer, you're not on crew."
"I can't. I got football tryouts." Archie could tell Fred was disappointed. "Or is that not okay?"
"No, it's okay. Good luck."
Archie smiled, kissed Fred goodbye, and headed out the door.
Meanwhile, Betty was getting ready when her mother, Alice, came into the room.
"Betty, this year is crucial for colleges," Alice reminded. "Grades are important, then there's extracurriculars, athletics, and maintaining a decent character is hugely important."
"Mom, I'm a sophomore," Betty argued.
"You've accomplished so much. I just don't want anything jeopardizing that. I mean, just think of your poor sister. She was a shining star before she let that Blossom boy ruin her."
"Mom, I'm not Polly."
"You missed curfew."
"By seven minutes. I was with Archie, who has red hair, yes, but nothing like Jason."
"But sweetie, all boys are like Jason Blossom. I love you so much, Elizabeth, and I want you to stay smart, and stay focused, okay?"
"Don't worry, I will."
Betty kissed Alice goodbye and headed out the door.
At the high school, Archie was getting stuff from his locker when he was approached by Reggie Mantle.
"Bro, you are ready for football," he said. "I'm not kidding. You are ripped. How much do you bench? You gotta give me some tips. Romanian deadlifts, right? Taking some T? Ginseng? Maca root?"
"It's from working construction, Reg," Archie replied.
"Right, right." Reggie turned to another one of the football guys and hooked hands with him. "Hey, Moose, look who grew up over the summer."
Moose followed Archie and Reggie.
"You work on any houses?" Moose asked. "Any private homes?"
"Yeah, a couple," Archie admitted.
"Did you tap some cougar ass this summer?"
"You know, that's more of a fantasy coming from your wank-bank."
Elsewhere in the school, Betty was showing Veronica around.
"I usually start my tours with a little history and context," she said. "Riverdale High first opened its doors in 1941, and…"
"And hasn't been redecorated since, apparently," Veronica remarked, looking at all the boring decor. "Honestly, I feel like I'm walking through the lost epilogue of 'Our Town'. So, what's the social scene like here?"
"Football games on Fridays and then tailgate parties at the Walmart parking lot. Saturday night is movie night, regardless of what's playing at the Bijou, and you better get there early, because we don't have reserved seating in Riverdale."
"That sounds nice. We should do that sometime."
Meanwhile, Kevin entered the school auditorium. He saw Josie and the Pussycats singing their perfect harmony like always.
"Excuse me," he called.
Josie didn't seem pleased to see Kevin. "Excuse me, this is a closed rehearsal."
"Sorry. Josie, right? I was hoping I could talk to you about some songs I wrote."
"Let me just stop you right there. The Pussycats are building a brand. We're creating a signature look. We're telling a story." Josie raised her hand in the air and snapped her fingers as she said that. "Last year, we won Rockland County's Battle of the Bands. This year, we'd like to build on that success, continue telling our story, with songs we write."
"Listen, I get that, but…"
"Read my glossed lips, Justin Dweeber. Not, gonna, happen."
Josie waved goodbye. Kevin knew what she was implying, so he walked out.
Betty continued showing Veronica around the school.
"Oh, and of course, there's the Back-to-School semi-formal dance tonight," she mentioned.
Veronica stopped her when she saw Archie in front of them. "There's the hottie from last night, the red-headed Ansel Elgort. Is he your boyfriend?"
"No, not anymore. We had a fling this past summer, but now it's over."
Veronica smiled. "Well, in that case, mind putting a good word in? I've had every flavor of boy, but orange."
"I would, but the dance might get canceled because of what happened to Jason. They're gonna tell us at the assembly."
Veronica was confused. "Who's Jason and what happened to him?"
Betty looked away sadly. Veronica was able to put the pieces together. She felt a bit bad for insensitively asking that question.
Later that day, everyone was gathered at the school gym. Cheryl Blossom was standing in front of the microphone.
"Thank you for the moment of silence," she said. "Many of you were lucky enough to have known my brother personally. Each and every one of you meant the world to him. I loved my brother and I always will, so I speak with the confidence only a twin could have. Jason wouldn't want us to spend the year mourning. He would want us to move on with our lives. That is why I've asked the school board not to cancel the semi-formal, but rather to heal collectively, and celebrate my brother's too, too short life on this mortal recoil. Thank you all."
Everyone in the crowd applauded.
Riverdale
Chapter 1
The River's Edge
After the assembly, Kevin found Ms. Grundy in the hallway. She was a woman in her mid-thirties, wearing dirty-blonde hair in a bun, glasses, a white shirt, and a blue skirt.
"Ms. Grundy!" Kevin called, getting her attention.
"What can I do for you, Mr. Keller?" Ms. Grundy asked.
"Can we talk?"
"Depends. About what?"
"Music. You're the music teacher. Can we talk about music?"
"Sure, during my official office hours."
Ms. Grundy walked away.
At the construction site, Fred was preparing to work. He saw a familiar face sitting in front of his desk, a face he never thought he'd see again.
"Hermione Lodge," he chuckled. "My day just got a lot more interesting."
"Hello, Fred," Hermione greeted. "How are you?"
"Surprised. Can I get you anything? A drink of water, perhaps?"
"A job. I saw on your website that you are looking for a seasonal hire, someone to help with books."
"Yeah. My guy's on paternity leave."
"You know, I think my daughter's going to school with your son. Isn't that funny? We'll have to tell them how we know each other, that we even dated for a little while. Well, at least until I…"
"Chose the rich kid?"
"And now a reversal of fortune. How's Mary doing?"
"She's in Chicago. We're split up, but civil. How about you? How are you holding up?"
"I have a little money saved. I was praying that someone in Riverdale, maybe an old friend, will give me the benefit of the doubt."
"If it were up to me."
"Isn't it up to you? It's your company."
"Well, I have clients. I can't very well have Hermione Lodge, the wife of Hiram Lodge, who's on trial for fraud and embezzlement, balancing my books."
Hermione sighed. "I suppose you can't."
During lunch period, Kevin showed Archie and Betty a demo for his new song when Veronica approached them.
"Mind if I join?" she asked.
"Not at all," Betty replied.
Veronica sat down next to Archie. "What are we doing?"
"Listening to one of Kevin's songs."
"His is some of the best singing I've ever heard," Archie added.
"Wait, that was you singing something you wrote?" Veronica asked Kevin.
"Yeah, but it's rough," Kevin admitted.
"No, it's incredible, the little snippet I heard. Is that your thing? Music?"
"Yeah, that's the plan."
"So, how's your first day going?" asked Archie. "Good?"
"Not to be a complete narcissist," Veronica replied. "But a part of me was hoping people would be…"
"Obsessed with you?" Kevin assumed. "Don't worry. Any other year, you'd be trending number one, for sure. This year, though, it's all about Cheryl trying to win the Best Supporting Psycho Oscar for her role as Riverdale High's Red Widow."
Kevin gestured to Cheryl nearby, who was showing off her red dress.
"Hey, I gotta go," Archie said as he got out of his seat. "I got football tryouts."
"I gotta go too," Kevin said as he got up. "I have a meeting with Ms. Grundy."
Right when Archie and Kevin left, Cheryl approached their table.
"Veronica Lodge," she smiled. "I've heard whisperings. I'm Cheryl Blossom. Can I sit?" She didn't even wait for an answer. She just sat down next to Veronica in the spot Archie was sitting in earlier. "So, what are you girls talking about? Archie's Efron-esque emergence from the chrysalis of puberty?"
Betty shook her head at Veronica. Veronica got the message.
"Extracurriculars," she lied. "Principal Weatherbee wants me to sign up for a few."
"You must do cheerleading," Cheryl suggested. "I'm captain of the River Vixens. Some people say it's retro, but I say it's eternal and iconic."
"At Spence, I sat at the top of the Elites' pyramid. I'm in. Betty, you're trying out too."
Cheryl turned to Betty. "Of course. Anyone can try out, but Betty has so much on her plate right now, and being a Vixen is kind of a full-time thing, but open to all! Follow me online and I'll do the same. My profile is cherylbombshell."
Cheryl got up and walked away.
"Go ahead and hate on cheerleading," Veronica told Betty. "But if Prince Hipster…"
"I'd love to be a cheerleader," Betty interjected. "It would look great on my college application, but when I tried out last year, Cheryl said I look fat."
"Well, you're a total smoke show now. I mean it. As hot and smart as you are, you should be the queen bee of this drab hive. If you want to be a River Vixen, I'll help you prep. I have moves."
Betty gave it some thought, then decided to go with it. "Alright, show me your moves."
Kevin showed his demo to Ms. Grundy. When the song ended, she was in tears.
"They're… very real," she said.
"I took your advice and wrote them down, polished them," Kevin explained. "But I was wondering if maybe you could help me."
"With what?"
"You went to Julliard. There's no one else in Riverdale who can teach me. Believe me, I've looked."
"I don't think that's a good idea. If I give someone private lessons, I could give someone the wrong idea. I'm sorry, Kevin, but you have to pursue your music without me."
Kevin sighed, but relented.
Betty and Veronica, now dressed in cheer uniforms, carried pom-poms and danced in front of Cheryl.
"We're blue, and gold, we're dynamite!" they both cheered. "We'll take you down, and fight the fight! Woo! Go bulldogs!"
Cheryl wasn't impressed. "Ladies, where's the heat, the sizzle?"
Not knowing where to go from there, Veronica improvised by grabbing Betty's hand. "Don't freak out. Just trust me."
Betty had no idea what was going on. Before she knew it, Veronica pulled her in for a kiss on the lips. Betty wanted to pull away and leave, but she didn't. She just stayed there until Veronica was done kissing her.
They turned to Cheryl to see how she would react. She had the same dissatisfied face she had before.
"Check your sell-by-date, ladies," she said. "Faux lesbian kissing hasn't been taboo since 1994. So let's see if you do better with the interview portion of our audition. Betty, how's your sister doing?"
"Uh, Polly's fine," Betty lied. "Thanks for asking."
Cheryl turned to Veronica. "Veronica, has Betty told you about her sister yet?"
"Uh, no," Veronica replied.
Cheryl turned back to Betty. "Go ahead, Betty. Tell Veronica about your sister and my dear brother."
Betty sighed. "Fine. Polly and Jason dated."
Cheryl scoffed. "I wouldn't say 'dated'. In fact, Jason's probably why your sister had a nervous breakdown and is why she's now in a group home."
"That's what my parents think."
"What do you have to say about that, Betty? Go ahead, the floor is yours. Whatever you've been dying to spew about Jason and how he treated Polly, unleash it. Destroy me. Tear me a new one. Rip me to shreds. Annihilate me."
Betty closed her fists, fighting the urge to punch Cheryl in the face.
"I just…" she started.
"Finally," Cheryl sighed.
Betty opened her fists, and noticed that her fingernails had dug into her skin, making her palms bleed.
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry about what happened to Jason," she eventually said. "I can't even imagine what you and your family must be going through."
Cheryl nodded. "Right. Veronica, welcome to the River Vixens. Betty, better luck next time."
Veronica was completely furious. For the first time ever, she didn't want the spotlight all to herself, she wanted to share it with her first real friend, but she was getting a spot in the Vixens and not Betty. Well, that wasn't gonna happen this time.
"Why?" she asked Cheryl. "Because you couldn't bully Betty into being a bitch?"
"I need girls with fire on my squad," Cheryl replied.
Veronica laughed. "I know what you need, Cheryl, because I know who you are. You would rather people fear than like you, so you traffic in terror and indignation. You're rich, so you've never been held accountable, but I'm living proof that that certainty, that entitlement you wear like a crown, it won't last. Eventually, there will be a reckoning, or, maybe that reckoning is now, and maybe that reckoning is me. Betty and I come as a matching set. You want one, you take us both. You wanted fire? Sorry, Cheryl Bombshell, my speciality's ice."
Cheryl made a valiant effort not to show it, but that stung real good.
Flashback
On July 4, Archie and Betty went to Sweetwater River for a relaxing picnic.
Once they were done eating, they both decided to go for a swim. They took off their clothes until they were only in their underwear.
Archie didn't know why, but he turned towards Betty right as they were about to get in the water. Specifically, he looked down at her breasts.
His memory from there was blurry, but the next thing he knew, Betty was laying on a towel while Archie was on top of her. Betty tickled Archie's nipples, and he returned the favor by rubbing his hands down her spine, giving her a weird yet good sensation.
The moment was ruined when they heard the sound of a gunshot. Not knowing what to do, they just grabbed their clothes and made a run for it.
End of Flashback
Archie snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the whistle blow.
"Andrews!" the coach called.
Archie approached the coach to see what was the matter. "'Sup, coach?"
"Here." The coach tossed Archie a purple jersey.
Archie examined the jersey and saw the number nine. "This is Jason's number."
"It's yours, now. Usually, sophomores only play JV. This year, we got an open spot on Varsity. From what you've been showing us, well, I want you to fill it."
"Varsity's got longer practices, more away games."
"Yeah, more commitment."
"Well, I need to think about it, coach."
"You got something better to do?"
"My dad's company. It's a family business. He wants me to help out after school."
"You know what? Why don't you sleep on it?"
The coach started giving the other kids orders. Archie just stood there, contemplating everything.
Veronica just finished helping Betty put on her new cheer uniform.
"Veronica, why did you defend me?" Betty asked curiously. "I know the crowd you ran with in New York. Why are you being so… nice?"
Veronica saw there were other girls in the room. "Let's go somewhere more… private."
The two girls went to the empty field.
"When my father got arrested, it was the worst thing ever," Veronica explained. "All these trolls started writing horrible things about us. We'd get letters and emails saying Dad was a thief, Mom was a clueless socialite, and I was the spoiled, rich, ice princess, and what hurt the most about it was… it was all true. I was like Cheryl, worse even, so when my mom said we were moving to Riverdale, I promised myself I'd use this as an opportunity to become a better version of myself."
"That's a lot of pressure," Betty said empathetically. "When Polly and Jason got together, it meant everything to her and nothing to him. Things got super tense, weird, and toxic, and my mom turned on Polly, said she wasn't her daughter anymore. Jason hurt Polly, but it's my mom who broke her."
Veronica saw Archie on the other side of the field. An idea popped into her mind, one that was bound to make Betty feel better..
"Oh, you're so doing this," she whispered before turning to Archie. "Archie!"
"Veronica, what are you doing?" Betty asked.
"Slaying your dragons, one by one."
Archie approached the two girls. "Hey. Nice outfits."
"Hi, teen outlander. Betty here has something she wants to ask you."
Betty knew there was no getting out of this now, so she relented. "I was wondering if you wanted to come to the after school dance, with… both of us."
Veronica wasn't expecting that. "What?"
"Veronica, it's your first dance at Riverdale. You should have someone to go with, even if it's just a friend."
"I'm not really in the space for a dance," Archie admitted.
"Oh, that's okay."
Veronica wasn't having it, though. "Completely unacceptable, Archiekins. We need an escort. Take a break from being a tortured football player, and come spend a peaceful evening with not one, but two, newly-minted River Vixens. We'll text you the time and place."
"Okay, see you then," Archie said before walking off.
Play "Number One" by Tove Styrke
Betty jumped on the bed and mouthed the lyrics of the song to herself. She then jumped off the bed and used a stippling brush as a microphone.
Praise cool, I'm sorry, but there's no can do
My youth ain't tangled up in bad decisions
Poor you, you thought you could dictate the rules
Boohoo
End "Number One"
The music cut off. Betty turned and saw Alice come in.
"What is that?" Alice asked, staring at Betty's outfit disgustedly.
"I made the cheer squad," Betty replied.
"Cheryl Blossom's squad, after what Jason did to Polly? I'm sorry, but I won't allow it. Take that off, now."
Any other time, Betty would've done it, but she wasn't having it anymore. "No. I do everything for everyone. I do everything to be perfect. The perfect daughter, the perfect sister, the perfect student. Can't I do this one thing for me?"
Betty shoved past Alice and prepared to head out.
"Where are you going?" Alice asked.
"To buy a dress," Betty replied. "Because guess what? I'm going to the dance with Archie and Veronica."
"Wait, Hermione Lodge's daughter?"
"She's actually really nice and trying to be a good person."
"You think so? Let me tell you something. Girls like Cheryl and Veronica don't like girls like us…"
"I don't want to hear it, Mom! It's happening, whether you like it or not!"
Betty left.
Meanwhile, Smithers helped Hermione finish moving the stuff into the apartment.
"Thank you, Smithers," said Hermione. "As always, you're a godsend."
"Happy to help."
"Unlike the rest of Riverdale." Hermione noticed a bag on the desk. "What's that?"
"A bit of good news. The car service found and dropped off a missing bag."
Hermione didn't recall forgetting any bags. She opened the sack to reveal stacks and stacks of hundred-dollar bills.
"Oh, Hiram, what have you done?" she asked.
Archie was getting ready for the dance when Fred came into the room.
"I got a call from your coach today," he said. "He's under the impression that you can't play varsity football because you had to work for me, which is odd because you made it seem like you couldn't work for me because you were playing football. So, my first question is, who are you lying to? Me or your coach?"
After a moment, Archie said, "Both. Dad, I want to play football, but I also don't want to abandon you. It's just… I can't decide."
"Three months ago, you were so sure of yourself. What happened?"
"I've changed. Everything's changed. This summer…" Archie had no idea what to say next.
"'This summer' what?"
Archie didn't respond.
"So that's it?" Fred assumed. "We don't talk anymore?"
"Dad…" Archie tried to assure.
"I don't want you to put stress on yourself, and you don't have to work for me if you don't want to, but some advice, man-to-man? These decisions that you're making, they go on to form who you are and who you will become. Whatever you decide, be confident enough in it that you don't have to lie."
That night was the dance. Archie entered the gym with both Betty and Veronica in his arms.
"Well, it's not the Met Ball," Veronica remarked.
The gym was filled with lights, music, and tapestries of Jason.
"Hey, when do you have to let Coach Clayton know about football?" Betty asked Archie.
"This weekend," Archie replied.
"Guys, can we just liberate ourselves from the tired dichotomy of jock/construction worker?" Veronica asked. "Can't we, in this post James Franco world be all things at once?"
"I've been working on it, Veronica."
"Well, work faster. I'm getting punch." Veronica turned to Betty and whispered, "You got this."
Veronica walked away, leaving Archie and Betty alone.
"It's about following your heart, right?" Betty asked. "What does your heart say? Construction or football?"
Once again, Archie couldn't come up with a simple answer to this very simple question.
Kevin got himself a cup of punch. He saw Ms. Grundy sitting on one of the chairs.
"Hey," he greeted.
"Kevin, didn't I make it clear I'm not gonna teach you?" Ms. Grundy asked.
"Yeah, but this summer, the only thing that kept me sane was writing these songs. So, here's my not-so-indecent proposal. You spare as many mornings a week as you can, that's all it will be, and I will leave you alone at any other point in time."
Ms. Grundy sighed. "Monday, Wednesday, Friday, 7:30 AM, before first period. I'll set it up, and see about giving you credit. Deal?"
"Deal." Kevin shook Ms. Grundy's hand.
"Good evening, friends," Cheryl greeted the audience. "Are you all having a good time?"
The crowd cheered until Cheryl raised her hand, telling them to stop.
"As honorary chairperson and de-facto queen of tonight's semi-formal, it is my pleasure to introduce tonight's entertainment," she went on. "To know them is to be obsessed with them. Though they usually perform their own music, tonight, they'll be debuting a cover of the song my parents claim they were listening to the night Jason and I are conceived. This one's for you, JB. I give you, Josie and the Pussycats."
Play "All Through the Night" by Cyndi Lauper
The crowd went wild as the band got on stage.
Josie played her guitar, Valerie played the keyboard, and Melody played the drums.
Josie:
All through the night, I'll be awake and I'll be with you
"Do you want to dance?" Archie asked Betty.
"Okay," Betty replied.
The two held each other's shoulders and started dancing.
All through the night, this precious time when time is new
"So, what are you planning?" asked Betty.
"I'll do football practice after school, and I'll work with my dad on the weekends," Archie decided. "It's going to be nuts."
"As long as you don't give up your passion."
We have no past, we won't reach back
Keep with me forward all through the night
Betty saw Veronica dancing with Kevin. They both mouthed at her to make her move.
And once we start, the meter clicks
And it goes running all through the night
"Now that I'm a River Vixen," Betty told Archie. "And you're gonna be on varsity football, I have this fantasy of us as a power couple. Is that so impossible to imagine?"
End "All Through the Night"
Archie looked at Betty, then he looked at Veronica. Back when he and Betty had their fling, he wanted to surprise her at the end of summer by saying he wanted their relationship to carry past it. Now, though, he met Veronica, a girl that was just as beautiful, if not more so than Betty. Now, a part of him wanted to be with Veronica.
Once again, Archie found himself unable to make a decision.
Cheryl saw what was happening from the stage.
"Make sure those two turtle doves come to my after-party," she told one of her Vixens. "Veronica too. I'm in the mood for chaos."
Later that night, the sophomores were all gathered at the Blossom mansion, Thornhill.
"It's game time at Chez Blossom, kiddies," said Cheryl. "We're going old-school tonight. Seven Minutes in Heaven. Who wants to tryst in the Closet of Love first. My vote is A for Archie. Anyone care to second it?"
"Yes, Andrews, yes!" Reggie shouted.
"Alright, gather around. Let's see who's riding the ginger stallion tonight."
Cheryl spun the bottle. Everyone watched in suspense.
What no one knew, though, was that Cheryl rigged it. The bottle landed between Betty and Veronica. Lean closer, though, and they could see it was a tiny bit closer to Veronica.
"It's clearly landed on the new girl," Cheryl said.
"Um, I'm not doing this," Veronica said.
"That's up to you, but if you don't, house rules decrees that the hostess gets to take your turn."
Veronica could tell that Archie did not want to spend a single second in a closet with Cheryl, so she agreed to it.
Play "Only" by RY X
Coming from the cold, buried under heat
Lay you on the floor, heavy like the force between us
Cut me like a rose, turn me like a beast
Hold me on the floor, heavy like the force between us
Archie and Veronica stood in the closet, silent.
"I know her brother died and everything," Veronica eventually said. "But Cheryl Blossom truly is the antichrist."
They both chuckled at that joke.
I was a ghost, hunter in flood, kneeling
Mare of the heart, God undertow, feeling
"So, do you miss New York?" asked Archie.
"It's been less than a week, but yes," Veronica admitted.
Archie checked the timer. "Six minutes, twenty seconds. Okay, now you ask me a deep, probing question to kill time."
"It looked like you and Betty were having fun at the dance."
"Definitely. We've been friends forever. My turn."
But I was only falling in love
I was only falling in love
I was only falling in love
"I didn't ask my question. Is that all it is? Just friends?"
"No. We're best friends. My turn now. Do you have a boyfriend in New York?"
"No. My turn. Could it ever possibly become something more?"
"Are you asking for Betty or yourself?"
Coming from the cold, buried under heat
Lay you on the floor, heavy like the force between us
Cut me like a rose, turn me like a beast
Hold me on the floor, heavy like the force between us
"Betty, and you didn't answer my question."
"It has, once, but never again."
"Do you happen to have feelings for someone else, now?"
"Yeah, just now. Do you?"
"Maybe. You're a little more dangerous than you look, all boy-next-door-ish."
"You have no idea."
I was a ghost, hunter in flood, kneeling
Mare of the heart, God undertow, feeling
They both got closer to each other.
"Your turn again," said Veronica. "Ask me another question. Ask me anything you want."
By now, they were both right in each other's faces. They leaned towards each other, puckered their lips.
"We shouldn't do this," said Veronica.
"You're right, we definitely shouldn't do this," Archie agreed.
But by then, it was too late. They both got too close. Their lips locked onto each other.
But I was only falling in love
I was only falling in love
I was only falling in love
End "Only"
When the timer finally went out, Archie and Veronica came out of the closet. They looked around, and saw that Betty was nowhere to be found.
"Where's Betty?" asked Veronica.
"She spiraled and left," Cheryl explained. "Between us, she's a lot more high-strung than she looks."
"You shady bitch."
Archie and Veronica ran to the front door. Archie tried to call Betty, but there was no answer.
"Her cell is off," he said.
"I'm getting an uber," Veronica decided, pulling out her phone.
"Can I come with you? We gotta look for her."
"Believe me, the last thing Betty wants is us tracking her down together. We messed up."
Veronica returned to her apartment.
"Hey, you're home early," Hermione said. "How was the dance?"
"It was fine," Veronica replied. "It's not the Met Ball, but…"
"Tell me about it."
"I'm super tired, Mom." Veronica leaned on Hermione's shoulder.
"Is everything okay?"
Veronica didn't say anything else.
It was midnight, and Archie arrived at the one place in town that was still open. He hoped to find Betty, but instead, he found an old friend.
Jughead Jones. He was your typical emo child. He had dark hair, dark clothing, pretty much everything about him was dark. What made him stand out from other emos, though, was his beanie. The edges were folded to look like the spikes of a crown.
Jughead just glared at Archie for a second, then went straight back to typing on his laptop.
Archie turned to Pop. "Hey, Pop. Betty hasn't come tonight, has she?"
"Nope," Pop replied. "Just the nighthawks."
"Alright, thanks anyway." Archie approached Jughead and sat across from him. "Hey, Jughead."
"Typical," Jughead muttered. "Archie Andrews comes to me for the first time in seven years, and all he says is 'hello'."
Archie tried to lighten Jughead's mood by asking, "What are you working on?"
"My novel," Jughead replied. "It's about this summer, and Jason."
"Fifteen years old, and how will he be remembered? As captain of the water polo team?"
"The Aquaholics. Considering how he died, probably not."
"No, what I mean is… Was he doing everything he was supposed to do, everything he ever wanted? Did he even know what that was?"
"Coach Clayton was here talking to Pop Tate. Varsity. Does that make you Mr. Popular now?"
"No. In fact, I'm terrified that I lost my best friend tonight."
"You mean Betty? Whatever happened, just talk to her. You'd go a long way. You would've gone a long way with me."
Archie remembered how their last moments… didn't end well. He sighed, and walked out.
Archie headed to Betty's house. He knocked on the door. Betty eventually answered. She did not seem pleased to see him.
"I'm not gonna ask you what you did with Veronica at Cheryl's," she said. "But I'm asking you now, right now, if you really love me, Archie."
"Of course, I love you, Betty," Archie assured. "But I can't give you the answer you want."
"Why?"
"You are so perfect. I've never been good enough for you. I'll never be good enough for you."
There were a few seconds of awkward silence, then Betty walked back inside.
And so, it wasn't one heart that was broken that night, it was two.
And the night was still far from over.
Reggie and Moose were on their way home from Cheryl's party. They were passing by the river when they saw something horrifying.
It was Jason. He was shot in the forehead, and his body was washed ashore.
By morning, everyone would be talking, texting, and posting about it. They'd all be feeling it. The world around them had changed, maybe forever.
Riverdale wasn't the town it was before. It was a town of shadows and secrets now.
On Monday, the autopsy on Jason's body would take place. On Tuesday, halfway through fifth period, the first arrest would be made.
Riverdale
In Loving Memory of JB Moranville
September 17 1994 - October 1 2016
A.N.
Rewatching the first episode really hits differently when you know how bonkers the show's gonna go from there.
There is SO much I feel the need to talk about regarding the changes I'm going to make to this story.
First off, Archie Andrews himself. A big problem people have with the show is how Archie is marketed as the main character, yet his plotlines are usually so disconnected from the main story. Season 1 is the most prominent example of this, since the majority of it is just Archie writing songs. I won't deny that KJ Apa sounds beautiful when he sings (which not enough people give him credit for), but he isn't really involved with the main mystery. As a result, I've decided to fix that. Archie is going to be more involved in the mystery.
As a result, Kevin is going to be the one with the music arc in this story. Another problem so many people have is that Kevin has no personality outside of the Gay Best Friend trope. His plot in every season really just boils down to him trying and failing to find a boyfriend (until the last season, at least, when he finally lives happily ever after with Clay), and only appearing in the actual mystery whenever it's convenient. To fix that, I'm planning to give Kevin a bit more personality by giving him an interest in music. It already fits because he usually directs the school musicals, and many have said that Casey Cott has the best singing out of everyone in the Riverdale cast. On another note, some praise the final season has received was how Kevin was handled, as we actually see him starting out thinking he's straight, and then having his gay awakening as the story progresses. I'm gonna try to replicate that. In this version, Kevin's not gonna have his awakening until season 2, the same time Cheryl has her awakening.
Going back to Archie, another problem people have with this show is how bonkers the love drama is. I mean, it's not a plain love triangle, it's SO NEEDLESSLY COMPLICATED! To make things easier to follow, I'm just gonna keep it traditional. Archie struggles to choose between good girl Betty and bad girl Veronica. (Spoiler alert: it's gonna end in a threesome, much like how the Nancy/Steve/Jonathan love triangle in my Stranger Things rewrite ended in a threesome). As a result, there will be no Veronica x Reggie, no Betty x Jughead, and DEFINITELY no Archie x Ms. Grundy.
I've said on my profile that pedophilia is one of the things I will NOT do, and I'm a man of my word. That's why in this universe, Ms. Grundy won't be a pedophile. She's just an identity thief.
Also, it wasn't Ms. Grundy that was with Archie at Sweetwater River on July 4. It was Betty. I felt it would've made a little more sense if Archie dated Betty for a little while at the beginning as it would've provided a bit more impact regarding Archie's struggle to choose and Betty grappling with her feelings.
Initially, I didn't mind Betty x Jughead. I saw them as something similar to Nancy and Jonathan in Stranger Things (though I guess that's what the writers were going for). Well, that all changed when I learned (I don't remember where) that Jughead is asexual in the original comics (Riverdale was my introduction to the Archie Comics, so I had no idea until I was told about that). A lot of asexual people were hoping they'd be given representation, in a way where the asexual character wasn't stereotyped as an autistic with no emotions like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory, and were completely pissed when that turned out to not be the case. Well, if you happen to be one of those people, I hope you're happy that I put that back in.
And yes, I did keep the Betty and Veronica kiss. It was too good to get rid of.
That's all I have to say. Thanks for reading.