Chapter title "Monsters in the Dark" by MyKey
Characters belong to MCU
[I guess content warning that there is some discussion of animal death in the chapter. Nothing graphic. Mentions of Laika and metaphorical lambs.]
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Chapter 9: There are Monsters in the Dark
By the next morning, they had something of a plan. The large map that Natasha had been marking off the evening before now had several large parking lots circled. A rout had been planned which would take them through the destinations, one by one, while avoiding areas with open sight.
The sun wasn't quite up yet when they left the school. The whole world was washed in grey tones, and hushed in the twilight. Distant bird song, and the rattle of leaves pushed over concrete by the chilling morning breeze were the only noises in the abandoned city as they crept towards the first location. Not a word was said between them. Natasha strained to listen for even the faintest whines. Being able to catch the warning as early as possible could be the difference between making it to cover, or someone being caught.
Even Erik was silent as they moved. He'd grown unusually serious, watching ahead rather than meandering about and staring at everything like he usually did while they were changing locations.
The first stop was a playground constructed near a library and fire station. The large parking lot stretched like a lake between them. Dusty sedans, streaked from the light rain the night before, and a pair of equally dirty vans sat abandoned like boats left afloat on the sparkling grey of early morning asphalt. Eric stared at the shimmering scene for a long moment, then shook his head and muttered, and they moved on.
The second and third stops were just as fruitless. Eric frowned at them both in disapproval before shaking his head no. Darcy made a comment about him being like their cosmic anomaly bloodhound, but no one else laughed. Not even Erik, who would have loved that joke if he were more present.
By the time they approached their fourth location, the sun was working its way back down to the horizon. Dark grey clouds had been slowly consuming the sky all day, but they were still thin enough that its location was given away by a bright spot burning through.
They'd been walking almost nonstop since before the sun came up and Darcy was exhausted, even with Jane and Natasha taking short turns carrying the heavy equipment to give her breaks. Eric was also looking pretty worn out. The older man was dragging his feet and stumbling occasionally. His mutterings had fallen to nearly inaudible levels.
Jane had a small tablet device in her hands, and occasionally Darcy would have to steer her around objects and potholes.
"Anything on the Gameboy yet?" Darcy asked.
"Nothing strong enough to read on the handheld yet," Jane answered with a smile. "But, maybe soon."
Darcy tossed her head back with a dramatic groan into the sky. "Uuuugh! It needs to hurry up and start working. I can't wait to put this stuff down for good!"
"We're not leaving that equipment behind!"
"I'm not saying we abandon it, just maybe... stash it for a while. You know, come back later."
Jane gave an unamused grunt.
Darcy frowned up at the sky as the chain link fence of their destination grew near. "Do you think it's going to rain again soon? I'd like to be somewhere dry and warm before it starts. Maybe we should explore this place in the morning."
"I think we have a little while, still," Jane answered. "There's plenty of places we can find shelter up ahead if we need to, anyways."
The latest stop was an entire section of industrial buildings which appeared to have been abandoned since long before the invasion. The overhead view on the map did little justice to just how depressing the place was in person. Even from here, Darcy could see broken windows and long-faded paint.
"Oh yay, Chateau de Tetanis."
"You'll be fine. You had your shot a couple years ago, it's still good."
"Yeah, when I stepped on that nail fetching the equipment you dropped under that pier. That place was a trash heap. You do know how to pick your research sites, Jane."
"The trash heaps pick me. I'm just a slave to the whims of the universe. You know that."
"Oh boy do I," Darcy snorted. "And unfortunately, I am a slave to the whims of you." As she spoke, she sped up a bit so that as she finished her sentence she could punctuate it by checking her hip into Jane's. Darcy may have been the smaller of the two, but the heavy equipment she was toting gave her more than enough weight to throw around to leave her boss stumbling.
As they joked, they passed the fenceline and entered the old industrialized area. Natasha kept her eyes out for any signs of trouble, alien or otherwise, but the scientists turned their attention to Erik, looking for any hint of recognition, just like they did at every stop. For now, the man was giving no indication that this was the right or the wrong place. His shoulders were slack and there was a glaze of exhaustion over his eyes, but as Darcy watched, she noticed him paying some interest to a tall parking structure.
Natasha seemed to notice this, too.
"Lets start over there." The assassin pointed to the bottom entrance to the old parking garage which was only a few buildings away. "It'll let me get a good view of the area before we explore much farther in."
"Aye-aye, our fearless protector," Darcy said as they all diverted course to the dirty old concrete structure. Honestly, any opportunity to put her bags down and rest her feet even for a minute was a blessing at this point. As they changed direction, Erik seemed to perk up. His steps grew faster, and he began looking around with interest, instead of staring at his toes while he dragged his shoes across the ground.
Between them and the cracked concrete of the entryway, was a broad swath of pavement. The large parking lots which stretched between most of the buildings were the main reason this place had been circled along with the other locations they had marked to check.
Marooned in the sea of asphalt, tipped on its side, was an old cement mixer truck. Flecks of faded red paint gave the impression that it used to have a bright design of some sort on the barrel. Now, the machine was largely a rustic tan and grey that blended almost seamlessly into the dreary scenery around it. Perhaps that was why it wasn't until they were passing it that Erik gave a sudden shout of excitement.
It was a wordless exclamation, something akin to the bark of a fox, but it was loud and echoed like a gunshot off the hollow buildings surrounding them.
The women all froze. Erik bounded for the upturned truck, oblivious to their reactions.
"That's it! That's the one!" He cried, slapping his palms onto the large drum of the mixer like he was making certain it was real.
Natasha was the first to recover and quickly turned back to dart to the man's side, grabbing his arms and turning him back towards the garage.
"Erik," her voice was soft, but her movements were swift and purposeful as she steered him onward. "Remember, we have to be quiet. We are in a hot zone right now, and we don't want to attract any attention."
Natasha pushed him towards Darcy and Jane who quickly grabbed an arm each and took over, so Natasha could focus on watching the sky and surrounding buildings for signs of trouble.
"Did I do something wrong?" Erik asked as he let himself be swept forward.
"I'm sure it'll be fine," Jane reassured him with a tight smile. "Let's just be extra quiet for a while, okay?"
-x-
The air inside of the parking structure was cool and stale. The asphalt flooring was dry and safe from the rain outside, but a dampness had settled in, and bits of lichen were taking up residence in the cracks. Brown leaves, blown in from the trees scattered between the buildings outside, crunched under their shoes.
Erik dug the toe of his boot into a deeper pile, and kicked the leaves outward.
Jane and Darcy leaned against the walls and watched him shuffle about and study the leaves, while Natasha kept an eye outside for any sign they had been heard.
"Anything?" Darcy asked as Natasha finally followed them in.
"All quiet. I think we lucked out, but we need to be more careful. That could have gone very badly."
"No kidding," Darcy mumbled. She pointed a finger at Jane, who was again staring at the tablet. "Jane's getting some readings on her doo-hicky."
Natasha perked up at the news. "Are we close?"
"Of course we're close!" Erik answered. "Can't you see it?" He waved an arm out at the concrete around them.
"I see a lot of parking spaces," Darcy answered, then paused when her eyes caught sight of something she hadn't noticed before, "and some interesting graffiti over there."
Old, faded spray paint decorated several walls, mostly names and dates that were barely legible even before time wore them away. Several larger patches of color could be seen in the distance. This must have been a favorite spot for practicing graffiti. On one particular pillar was a fresher piece. Clearly it was from after the fall, but the fading around the edges gave the impression it hadn't been done much long after.
It was a rough depiction of the skyline of New York. Looming over the city, was a painting of Iron Man, with the mask pulled up to reveal a skull. His head was haloed by the Devil's Eye, and in dripping red paint that looked a bit too intentional, erring to the way of cheesy, were the bold words "THE DEVIL WATCHES OVER HIS WORK. SEE YOU IN HELL."
Underneath it, in far less dramatic print was a series of names and dates, and painted flowers like one might find left on a grave or memorial. If Darcy had to guess, they were probably a list of loved ones the artist had lost because of the fall.
"That's just crude," Jane hissed.
Natasha's face went stony while she studied the caricature of her long lost friend and teammate.
Erik's voice piped up. "That's not what he looks like. And that's not how you spell it!"
"Erik," Jane hurried to his side, her voice kept low. "Eric, let's not worry about-"
"He's skinny but he's not skeletal!" Eric interrupted her, sounding like he was giving a lecture. Like he thought she was the one who had painted it and needed to be corrected. "The liberties some people take!"
"Let's not discuss, this, okay?" Jane tried again, voice sugary sweet, though a line had formed on her forehead.
Natasha still hadn't said anything. She hadn't even taken her eyes off of the portrait.
"And he's not in hell! No more than the rest of us!" Suddenly he shook his head, stumbling away from Jane's loose hold on his arm. "Well there's other meanings for it!" he snapped out irritably, even though Jane hadn't said anything, glaring down at the leaves around his feet as they were kicked about. "But they're wrong even in the one they meant to use!... Can I not make a simple joke?"
"A joke?" Darcy asked, dancing out of his way as he paced around, staring only at the leaves and not where he was going. "Hey, big guy, maybe we don't joke about old friends, okay?"
Erik whirled around to face her, his eyes dark and agitated. "I wasn't joking about him! Why are you all ganging up on me?"
"Whoah, no ganging, no 'all.' Just me, you're buddy Darcy. I'm the funny one, remember?"
"Of course I remember you! I remember all of you. That's the problem!" He threw his arms out, resuming his pacing with a renewed fury. "I remember everyone, but NO ONE REMEMBERS ME!"
"What do you mean, Erik?" Jane tried again. "Of course we remember you."
"No you don't!" He whirled again to meet her gaze with eyes bright with tears of frustration. "You think you do, but you don't! You don't remember anything!"
"Easy, Erik, easy." Darcy carefully stepped into his line of sight. He was entering a fit.
Those bright eyes, wide and growing frantic, turned on her. "Not even you," he said miserably.
"Eri-"
"SO WHAT!" he snapped, spinning to look at something that wasn't there. He glared into the shadows and swirling leaves with a venom. "So what if the stars remember me? What does a mortal need with Infinity!?"
"Lassie saved some kid from a well. Well, a dog can comprehend a well! It can comprehend a hole, at least, and walls, and the terror of being trapped. The kid cries out, because he knows he is not where he is supposed to be. They do not cry out!" He flung his arms outward before dropping them heavily. "They do not comprehend these walls, and try as I might to save anyone I am not that dog, to be praised and loved for a comprehensible task. I am Laika; lost among the stars, alone, already out of reach." He spun on his heel, resuming his pacing, as he gulped in a great breath. His face was pale and pinched tight with lament as he slid from one thought to the next. "Laika did not make it home. She never saw the world she died for. She died for nothing in the end, didn't she? Will I not make it home? Will I die for nothing?"
Natasha, Jane, and Darcy all wore matching frowns. This fit was different. Typically, when they lost him, he simply spiraled away, still spouting science or snatches of conversations that faded in and out of their hearing and understanding. He hadn't spoken about death since the earliest days of his return from madness.
His pacing had led him back to Jane. Without warning, he reached out and grabbed her by both shoulders. "I would rather die for you. I would, I swear! But I can't. Maybe you are Laika. You just don't know it yet. Neither did she. Is it a sacrifice if you cannot see what lies ahead? Does the sheep sacrifice itself to the butcher's knife? Or is it only killed? Is there nobility in dieing merely because someone you cannot comprehend will gain from it? What makes them so worthy? What determines the sheep? Power or fate, cruelty or apathy?"
Darcy placed her hand on his arm, trying to draw his attention away from Jane. "Erik, Erik, we're waxing way too dark here. You're scaring me. Please come back to the just weird side of crazy? Jane's not gonna die, okay. Neither are you, or anyone else."
Eric twisted his arm in her grip, releasing Jane to grab Darcy back. "Where there is life there is death. This is the first law of our realm. It's why there are so many eyes turned our way. It's why the stars watch us."
His grip was tight, not tight enough to bruise, but even through her thick coat she couldn't pull away. She risked a glance into his eyes and could swear for a moment there were unnatural lights glittering back at her from his Irises. It must have been a trick, caused by the rays of sun leaking through and reflections on the windshields, but it sent a strange nameless sort of terror churning under her ribcage.
Natasha had drifted closer to the group. She spoke carefully. "We may all die eventually, but that's a long ways off. I am here to protect you right now. All of you. I promise."
"Ah..." His grip on Darcy's arm loosened, his attention turned on Natasha now. "Laika was Russian, wasn't she? Little red head that grew up on the streets, and perished in the stars... but the comparison may fall too close to a joke, and I'm not supposed to make jokes, am I? I wouldn't, Natalia. Not that one. It's too cruel." He sighed, seemed to deflate as his eyes dropped once more to the leaves.
"Perhaps we are no better. What is a star to a dog? What is a dog to a man? What is a man to a star?" He nodded sadly at his shoes, was silent for a long moment and then sighed out. "It is only the sheep balking before the black door. It will enter. It has come this far, and there is nowhere else to go. It cannot change its fate, no matter which path it takes."
No one dared say a thing, afraid one wrong word could wind him up again.
"Yes. The butcher balks, too, sometimes, I suppose. Perhaps I am only that; a butcher with too much pity for the lamb. I wonder if the scientists hesitated before they swung their axe on poor Laika's life? Sacrificed or butchered, or merely a means to a pointless end?... No, you would not hesitate. I would not expect you to."
A wry smile twisted his features. "Perhaps the stars' goals are as pointless to mortals as mans' are to a dog."
The smile fell away and he started walking again, returning to his loops, but at a much slower pace, dragging his toes on the ground as he muttered to no one. "Poor Liaka remains dead nonetheless... Where do they go?... Secrets-secrets-too many secrets... Rivers and oceans and rain... Who would I tell that will not be washed away by the end of this, anyways? … It would comfort me, to know. That's all"
His voice grew softer. He seemed to be returning to his usual place he went when they lost him. At this point, Darcy was a little relieved. The nonsensical mutterings he was working into felt normal compared to whatever had just happened.
Darcy looked to Jane and Natasha, but the scientist and ex-assassin looked just as beyond their depth. Unpredictable god-induced insanity kind of leveled the playing field between them, the assistant guessed. The thought was not reassuring.
"Why don't we, um, take a break, for a while?" Jane finally suggested. "The readings are still weak. I'll see if I can get a better read with the cosmograph."
"I still think that name makes it sound like a terrible mail delivery from Cosmo magazine." Darcy fell back on some humor, trying to push any normalcy she could into the atmosphere as she dug through the canvas satchel she'd left along the wall. "I'm going to make some coffee. I get the feeling we'll be staying the night here at Chateu De' Tetanus, and someone's going to need to keep an eye on our... guide."
-x-
Despite the rocky start, the evening passed fairly unremarkably. The group had moved deeper into the parking garage, where the dim glow of the lantern Jane was using to study her readings would not be visible from outside.
Erik had been corralled into a corner where he was etching designs into the concrete with a wet stick. A crack in the wall and uneven concrete had resulted in water puddling into a low spot. Here, the man had taken a seat, and would dip the end of the stick into the water, like an inkwell, to write into the floor and walls around him.
A dimmed lantern had been set next to him as well, so the group could keep an eye on him as he scribbled away.
When Darcy approached him, some time well after midnight, he was drawing those same seven circles again. By now they were looking more like a slinky, or maybe a very redundant eclipse.
All around him, anywhere his arm could reach, the ground was covered in fading equations and symbols she couldn't understand. It looked like the same strange unidentifiable system he'd been using since New York.
Certain symbols and patterns were beginning to look familiar after the many time's he'd written them down, and she'd subsequently had to destroy or erase them. A particular batch of symbols caught her eye as one of these. It was especially easy to notice, because for some reason he often wrote the main part of it out in a bubble lettered font. Why the man took the time to do that was far beyond her.
The 'text' itself contained symbols that looked almost exactly like a capital A, and similar to E, and B, making it even easier to recognize and remember. It was always written in the same pattern of two rows of big letters, these being the ones made with bubbled outlines, a series of small symbols scratched underneath, and a patch of dots and lines that reminded her of simple drawings of molecules set to the right. The whole thing kind of looked like a logo to her, but she couldn't begin to place it.
The clink of their camp plate echoed around the walls as Darcy set a bowl down near him, but he did not look up. He'd been sulking and largely unresponsive to them since the incident, and refused to eat dinner earlier. Jane had already tried to coax him into a conversation with no success. Now it was Darcy's turn, before she turned in for a nap and let Natasha take over the nightwatch.
"The soup came out really good tonight." They'd rehydrated some of the astronaut soup for their dinner. "It's that fancy brand that Jane really likes. It's better than her actual cooking, so I like it, too. You should eat some before she decides to go for a midnight snack and finishes it off."
He muttered something. Darcy couldn't tell if he was still speaking english, or had retreated to the odd language of the first days after his injury.
"Ooooor, if you're feeling more dessert-ish, I saved one of the chocolate bars for you."
That seemed to finally stir him. The scratching of the stick against pavement stopped, and he lifted his head to look at the candy bar in her hands. The dim lantern cast strange shadows across his face. His normally bright eyes were shrouded in an abysmal darkness, glittering like tiny night skies in the poor lighting.
"You are always so kind, Little Dark One," he whispered, as he reached out and took the bar of chocolate.
"Now there's a name I haven't heard in a while. Revisiting old hits?" In the early days of his return from madness, he had called many people by nicknames. Some she could make sense of, at least. He still slipped up and called Natasha 'Natalia' now and then. The names were very similar, so there wasn't much mystery behind it. He'd also called Jane 'Thor' a few times, likely the associations crossing wires in his head, which wasn't all that worrisome, but it was very awkward for everyone.
'Dark One' often sounded alarming to others, but it was the literal meaning to her name, which Erik would have known since long before Loki scrambled his brains. She had just felt grateful he remembered bits of her at all at the time, however he had to do it. She could live without the 'little' part, honestly. It had been a while, though, since he'd called her that.
He blinked at her, like he didn't understand what she'd said. "It's always been your name."
"Most people pronounce it 'Darcy.'"
The wrapper of the candy bar crinkled in his hand as he gave up his eye contact with her to stare it down instead. Under his breath, he whispered something she couldn't make out, before he picked the stick back up in his free hand.
Darcy winced at the horrible scuffing noise as the now fairly dry stick scraped against the concrete. The man lifted the stick back up and frowned at it, like he wasn't sure why it wasn't still wet, despite being set on the ground for quite some time. With a sigh, he leaned over to dip it into the puddle once more.
"Are you going to eat that?"
The stick paused in its renewed scribbling. Eric stared down at it with pinched brows. "... I don't think I can."
"I meant the candy bar," Darcy laughed, ignoring the more worrisome thoughts and feelings stirring inside her guts. He'd be back by morning. This was still much better than earlier. It was progress.
"Oh!" He exclaimed as he noticed the chocolate in his hand once more. "Yes, of course! Thank you Little Darcy."
"Mhm, how about we stick with just Darcy?"
In an attempt to keep them going, she pointed at the familiar patch that had caught her eye. He seemed especially prone to drawing it when he was upset. It was almost dried up, but he'd know which one she was pointing at. "What's this one? You've drawn it a few times now." More like a few dozen times.
Before answering, Eric craned his neck around to check if the others were anywhere in earshot, even glancing over his shoulder as if he thought someone might be hiding in the shadow he cast behind him.
He leaned in close, and whispered so lowly she had to strain to hear, "It's the crack in the door that will let the light in." Then he pulled away and held one finger up to his lips.
Darcy looked back down at the fading symbols, trying to memorize the design. Another puzzle piece. Another breadcrumb leading who-knows-where.
End
Chapter 10 Preview: "...When he wiped the steam from the mirror, he almost looked like himself again. The beard was haphazard and uneven, the clothing not his style or color, even worse against his complexion which was as pale as a ghost, and grey peppered his hair like a layer of dust that wouldn't wash away. But he looked, approximately, like Stony stark, and that seemed about right for how things felt just now..."
Not the most action packed chapter, but a very very important one. This chapter gives away quite a bit, especially if you've read Luciferous, and starts to tie the other texts and chapters together, and hints at a lot of things to come. We have another big player entering the stage. (Or I guess, since this chapter is about a year and a half BEFORE Astronautical starts, they've been there all along?) anyone who's read the Ego arc in Luciferous should hopefully recognize the name where it slipped in. It's been mentioned in passing a couple times, now.
Not sure if anyone will recognize the symbol Erik is drawing at the end. It's hard to describe in words.
Sorry for the sudden silence. Life has been horrible.
-OMaM