This one is going to just be straight up fluffy. Start the fic.
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A television screen showed an airplane, a car, and a bank building.
"Northwest Industries, whether it's airplanes, automobiles, or even banking… You can count on us to bring you a higher class of quality."
Pacifica shook her head ashamed at the commercial. From the outside looking in, the Northwests were every bit as pretentious as Dipper used to claim.
They were in line at the airport currently getting their tickets to New York City.
"I can't believe you agreed to use Northwest Airlines instead of the tickets Ford got us!" whispered Pacifica.
"Only so long as your cousin agreed to the terms I made!" Dipper whispered back.
They were finally next in line.
"We are Detectives Dipper Pines and Pacifica Northwest, here to pick up our tickets!"
The receptionist typed on her keyboard for a moment before nodding at her screen.
"Here you are! You'll be taking the Northwest Private Luxury Plane. Complete with massage chairs and hot tub."
She printed out the tickets and handed one to Dipper.
"Great! And you'll be able to board our RV no problem?" asked Dipper.
"No problem at all, Sir. Just be sure to tell the receptionist over there. Show the star at the bottom of the ticket to cut the line."
Dipper walked off to do exactly that but when Pacifica claimed her ticket there was an extra piece of paper with it.
"What's this?"
"Oh! Mr. Northwest has offered to replace your lost inheritance in a gesture of good faith! All you have to do is agree to the terms listed below. Just sign the bottom line with your signature and you'll get it all back."
For a moment Pacifica just stood staring at the paper. Silently grasping the situation, an option was presenting itself to her that for the longest time she had thought an impossibility.
"I... could be rich again... No more living from paycheck to paycheck..."
"Yes Ma'am! It'll be as if you never lost your money in the first place. All you have to do is agree to whatever the terms are and sign your name."
"... Well, that tells me everything I need to know. I don't even need to read it!"
Pacifica looked the receptionist in the eye as she ripped the paper into pieces.
"I don't WANT my money back! End of story!"
Pacifica looked over her ticket once to make sure she didn't accidentally rip it anywhere and then went to join Dipper.
The receptionist stared at the ripped-up pieces of paper on the floor and then pressed a button on her counter.
"Janitorial services to Line 3, please!"
Northwest Private Luxury Plane...
The wait to board the plane was almost insultingly short. Most likely because they were the only passengers.
Dipper had expected the likes of a jet but the plane itself was massive. It could probably fit a whole yacht full of people and yet Dipper and Pacifica were officially it's only passengers.
"Seems a bit excessive..." confessed Dipper.
"That's my family for you. Either knock out to impress or you're not doing it right."
Pacifica was still injured but thanks to a little 'new element' help from Ford, her condition had been upgraded from wheelchair to cane. Of course, her 'cane' was her special umbrella, normally not a thing allowed on flights, but their detective badges gave them special privileges. She was a little slow and sometimes wobbly, but Dipper was always right there by her side to help out just in case.
The aircraft cabin was obviously the reason as to why the plane was so huge. There were so many seats that it was practically a maze. That would be the first thing to come to mind if it wasn't for one thing.
"What's with all the roses?!" Pacifica almost shouted.
"That was my condition." explained Dipper. "Remember that little remedy I used when we were bitten by that Love Bug? It required the goop from my gun and prize-winning roses! So, I figured we'd take advantage of your cousin's desire to show off and maybe speed up your healing."
"But I thought you said that it didn't work on big injuries."
"True! Normally. However, you're so far along that I figured that it might be worth a shot! Especially since we now have a way to get the necessary roses in abundance! We can keep at it all the way to New York if we want!"
"Attention passengers..." About six feet down the aisle in front of the cockpit was the stewardess holding a microphone. "Please take your seats and buckle your seatbelts. We'll be taking off in just a minute."
Dipper looked around and saw that most of the seats had pots of roses strapped into them.
"Okay... Maybe I over did it with how many roses I asked for."
Pacifica scoffed. "Just follow me. They always keep the real luxury seats free."
The seats were neither up front nor in the back but in the middle. The first two seats closest to the aisles.
"They looked like massage chairs with cup holders!"
"That's because they are." explained Pacifica. "Just with airplane buckles."
They both sat down with Pacifica taking the outer seat. And while she didn't have any trouble buckling up, she still looked uncomfortable.
"Something wrong?" he asked. "It's not the leg again is it?"
"No it's just... Massage chairs with cup holders, blue ribbon roses on demand by the bulk... It never bothered me growing up but now that I've lived as a different classed citizen I can't help but wonder if this stuff was always so... Pretentious?"
"Well I did used to think that rich people were cheating at life my opinion changed on that too. A change in perspective is not unheard of especially given our brand of work along with our lifestyle."
Pacifica smiled at him. "And exactly what made you change your opinion?"
Dipper reached over and held her hand. "I got to know you."
She affectionately squeezed his. "You're sweet.'
The plane took off without event; the potted roses were fine as they were buckled with lids covering the dirt.
Eventually, the light turned on above the cockpit signaling them that were clear to move about. Dipper was about to suggest that they get to work on fixing her leg, but the arrival of the stewardess put a halt on those plans.
"Miss Northwest? If you could follow me for a second to coach; there's something that needs your attention."
Dipper was about to object but Pacifica put a stop to it. "It's fine, Dipper. I have a feeling that I already know what she wants to talk about. Just sit tight, this shouldn't take long."
"And exactly what am I supposed to do while you're gone? You're the one who the roses are for!"
"Just..." Pacifica pushed a button on Dipper's chair and it started to vibrate. "Relax."
"Oh wow! That actually feels nice! You're the best, Babe."
Dipper taken care of, Pacifica followed the stewardess to the back using her umbrella as a cane.
Once in the little divider between cabins, the stewardess closed the curtain, and Pacifica took a look around.
"This is about our individual bags right? I know the stuff inside can seem a little weird but..."
"Oh no, Ma'am! It's not about that!"
"Oh?"
"Mr. Northwest was informed of how you ripped the papers he drew up for you back at the airport. He doesn't want there to be any misconception! That was not to be interpreted as a bribe! Just a gesture of good faith from one family member to another."
"Just so long as I agree to whatever his terms are, right?"
"That's right. Which is exactly why I was given this little number."
The stewardess pulled out a device that looked like a credit card swiper. "Just swipe your bank card on this device, you'll get your money back, and you can discuss the terms for it with Mr. Northwest in person."
"Oh wow!" Pacifica's voice oozed with sarcasm. "Just one little swipe and I'll be rich again?"
The stewardess completely missed Pacifica's sarcasm. "That's right."
Pacifica smacked the device out of the stewardess' hands on to the ground.
"OH! Oooooh! Oh no. Look what happened accidentally on purpose! Think it's okay?"
"Seemed a little deliberate for an accident but..."
CRUSH!*
Pacifica's good foot stomped on the device just as the stewardess had started to reach for it.
"Oh no! I think I might be crushing it with my foot!"
"YES! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE DOING!"
"Oh, you think so? Because it does feel like I'm certainly crushing something but that would be crazy!"
"How am I supposed to explain this?!"
"Well maybe it'll still be- Oh! OOH! I think I might be digging my heel into it!"
"Stop it! Stop it!"
"You're right, I should stop it."
Pacifica removed her foot, and the stewardess let out a sigh of relief.
"So, I can start to fry it instead!"
Pacifica aimed her umbrella and shot out the tasers into the device.
"AAAACK!"
The card swiper jumped as volts of electricity were poured into the thing.
Another stewardess entered from behind and saw the device smoldering on the ground. Pacifica reeled back the cables as the second stewardess started to spray the device with a fire extinguisher while the first just sat on her knees in shocked horror.
Pacifica said nothing else and merely journeyed back to her seat in silence. There she found her Dipper leaning back in his chair fully vibrating.
"This chair feels so good! I can't imagine any reason why I would want to leave it!"
"Oh? Are you sure? I have something I think that you might find tantalizing..."
Pacifica reached into her purse and pulled out the box for Dungeons, Dungeons, & More Dungeons.
"Want to play?" she asked almost timidly.
"I thought you'd have enough of that."
"… No. And I want to make a new character."
"A gorg-"
"No! I want to make a character called Jackie the Elf Bandit… and… I'd like your help."
Dipper practically leapt out of the chair.
"Well, what're we waiting for?! Set up the graph paper!"
Cockpit... Two hours later...
"These new planes are incredible!" commented the captain. "I thought those weird changes those Northwest scientists made to the plane were just going to be malarkey but they were right! We've already cleared half the country!"
"And it's only been..." the copilot checked his watch. "Two hours! I don't know what they did but the Northwests need to share this stuff with the world! This could revolutionize air travel!"
"A nice idea but we both know that they'd rather patent this shit! There's no point in them letting the rest of the world in on it unless they can turn a profit!"
"I know you're right, but it still seems like a waste. We could be living in the future now! Oh well, I'm going to go check on the passengers!"
"Alright, try not to get any petals on the uniform."
The Copilot got up and opened the door. What he saw, however, made passenger seats full of roses look as plain as paint drying in comparison.
There was green goop everywhere, some even dripping from the ceiling, and graph paper was littered everywhere.
"WHAT HAPPENED IN HERE?!"
In the middle isle was Dipper and Pacifica. Dipper looked like he was in the middle of crawling over her, and Pacifica had some of the green goop covering her leg.
There was a boardgame next to them and it looked like some of the graph paper was stuck to it with the green goop. A few of the pots of roses looked like they had been plucked off nearly all their petals but he was fairly certain he could see some of them about the cabin.
"THERE'S GOOP AND GRAPH PAPER EVERYWHERE!"
"Uuuuuh... We were just playing a rousing game of Dungeons, Dungeons, & More Dungeons?"
"OH REALLY?! WHAT VERSION OF IT WAS IT?! THE TWISTER VERSION?!"
Pacifica blushed but Dipper sent the copilot a small glare.
"Hey man, back off! She's injured..." The goop on Pacifica's leg started to vibrate. "-ish?"
"... We'll be landing in another couple of hours! I don't care if you have to get a stewardess to help you, I want this stuff to be gone before we land! I do not care what your special conditions were, trashing the cabin could NOT have been part of the deal!"
He turned around and stormed back into the cockpit while the Mystery Couple exchanged a look.
"He's got a point, ya know?"
"... You're right. I suppose being different from my parents would mean being more considerate. And somebody is going to have to clean all this up."
"Our game will be put on hold yet again, my sweet!"
"As is always the case. Help me up, Dipper. I want to see how well the leg is now."
Dipper did exactly that and Pacifica put some pressure on her bad leg.
"Wow! That is a LOT better!"
"You're healed?" asked Dipper.
"Not completely. I don't think I need to use my umbrella as a cane anymore, but I don't think I can do any of our usual running around either!"
"Well, you can at least investigate your cousin with me, right?"
"So long as he doesn't try anything. For now, let's give this healed leg a trial run and clean up around here!"
"Excellent idea, Sweetheart! I can update the journal on the goop's healing effects while we're at it. Think I should get a stewardess like that copilot suggested?"
Pacifica lightly blushed. "I'm pretty sure those two don't want anything to do with me at the moment."
"Is this one of those 'Queen Bee's type things you told me about once?"
"... Sort of! Let's just say there's a lot less explanation if we just clean it up ourselves."
"Hm... I guess you're right. My goop can be a bit much to explain."
"Yeeeaaah... That's exactly what I meant."
Two hours later...
"No way! That can't be true!" proclaimed Pacifica.
"It is! I swear on my journal! Mount Rushmore is housing giant robots of the presidents, ready to be deployed in America's most dire hour!"
Pacifica couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sorry! I don't mean to laugh! I'm sure it must look very cool but I wouldn't exactly call that idea original. Such a black and white idea feels like it was lifted from another Network!"
"I doubt you would have the same tone if you ever saw them deployed!"
"Attention passengers!" The captain's voice rang from the intercom. "We are preparing to land so please take your seats."
Dipper put the last of the dirty graffiti paper away into the trash.
"Oh. Right. Other people exist. I was having such a good time with you that I actually forgot about that for a second..." Dipper grumbled.
Pacifica sat in her seat and patted Dipper's to invite him to sit down. She was smiling but Dipper had a feeling of dread about what she was about to try next.
He sat down and she grinned like the cat that caught the canary.
"Feeling a little possessive of your alone time with me, are you? Don't worry, I know the perfect fix to get your head back in the game!"
"Oh no, please don't tell me it's..."
"Yes! My game of Can I Have!"
Dipper groaned and buckled his seat belt.
"Can I have a puppy?"
Her focus was entirely on him, her smile ear to ear. And as much as Dipper hated this game of her's, he had to admit that it did help mentally ground himself.
"Of course not!"
"Kay! Can I have a diamond ring?"
At this Dipper, physically tense, he sat in silence. He knew this was the worst possible thing he could do but he was frozen in panic.
"Oh! This is new!" teased Pacifica. "Usually you just say 'No' but this is different!"
Dipper started to sweat. He desperately wanted to surprise Pacifica when he popped the question, but she had him dead to rights here!
"This isn't a 'No' but somehow at the same time it isn't a 'Yes' either. You're hiding something from me... but what? I know it can't be an actual diamond ring; we don't have the cash. You're still harboring a secret though..."
"If you know we can't afford a diamond ring then why do you ask for one?!"
"Teasing is a sign of affection, Dummy! Still... I can figure this out. I'm every bit of a detective as you... What don't you want me to know?"
Maybe it was because the plane was landing but Dipper sunk down into his chair.
"It involves a diamond ring... My possession of one... But I know we can't actually afford one so it can't be the ring itself... And finally, you look like you really, really, REALLY don't want me to figure it out. Hmmm..."
Pacifica leaned over her seat and inspected Dipper with squinted eyes.
Dipper hadn't felt this sweaty since he was twelve! As hard as he looked, he couldn't see a way out of this.
"Oh well!" Pacifica bounced back into her seat. "Must be pretty important if you're trying to keep it from me! I can wait for the big reveal or, like, whatever. It's just nice to know that I can make you sweat this much!"
Dipper let out a breath. 'Thank God! This is the woman I want to make my wife?! Am I nuts or what?!'
"By the way... I looked through some brochures and if we take the RV instead of the inevitable Northwest limo waiting for us, we can visit this local taco place. The owner says he has a recipe that makes the spiciest nachos on Earth! Wouldn't you like that?"
She turned to him with a smile and Dipper blushed. 'Yep. It has to be her! I am officially nuts for this woman!'
"Yeah." Dipper began. "I really would!"
"Great!" Pacifica beamed and rested back in her chair, closing her eyes.
"Remind me, did we remember to pick up our board game?"
"Yeah. It's in my purse."
"That purse... I swear, every time I think I got its size pegged it just turns out to be bigger."
"Yeah... Modern day purses are practically duffle bags."
Eventually...
There had been a limo waiting for them, just like Pacifica thought, but they convinced the service that all they really needed was their RV. The appointment was for tomorrow and even though they were offered a night at a five-star hotel, the Mystery Couple were in agreement that they were better off finding a safe place to park.
Pacifica was driving this time around, the taco place she had been talking about actually had a drive thru. Dipper was in the passenger seat, happily munching away at a basket of nachos.
"Man! They weren't kidding! These are some of the best nachos I've ever had!"
Pacifica was busy driving, but she had to admit, they did look good.
"Hey. Spicy Man. Give me some of that!"
Dipper was only too happy to comply. He made sure his selected nacho had plenty of cheese on it and then slowly made its way to her mouth. Pacifica never took her eyes off the road for a second but still opened her mouth and let him guide the nacho inside.
Her eyes widened slightly while eating it. "Oh, that IS good!"
"I thought you said that you only wanted to feed me this way and not the other way around?"
"I do like feeding you! It makes me happy, but only when your head is on my lap and I'm not driving. Besides, every rule has got to have an exception!"
"Well, there's gotta be a trailer park around here somewhere. Probably going to charge us though."
"We'll just take a little dip into our savings. We can afford a night by ourselves without bribery."
"What?"
"Uh Nothing!"
Later that night...
Mr. CeCe was more content with his life than most. He was a self-made man, owner of his own business, in New York City no less! He had started a jewelry store from the ground up and thrived to the point where he was starting to think about expanding.
Sure the hair on top of his head was gone but he made up for it with his lush mustache. He could easily pass a fourth Handlebar Brother.
He was a little underweight but that just made him look all the better in his suit. He often stayed open late in the off chance of a late-night customer.
DING!* *DING!*
Speaking of...
Mr. CeCe eagerly approached the counter for his new customer.
"Welcome sir, how can I help you this evening?"
Dipper took a breath and steeled himself for what he was about to say.
"I'd like to buy... an engagement ring."
That's all for now. Not some of my best work I admit. Mostly just fluff; but I promise that the next chapter will be the real start for their final case. Leave me a review and NOT a commission offer (seriously read my profile on it).