Disclaimer - I do not own Ah! My Goddess.

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Welcome back to Mara's Fairy Tales! Today, we'll be visiting the Three Little Pigs!

Tamiya and Otaki were carrying bundles of hay into an open field.

These two will be the Straw Pig! Yes, it is because they share a brain cell!

Keiichi was using rope and a small log to move a larger log over to a pile of large logs within a forest. He looked up and said, "I'm useing leverage to move the bigger log. I first tied up the larger log and-"

He's going to be Stick Pig. Probably because he's as boring as a wooden plank. Trust me, if you really wanted to learn what he was talking about, you'd have googled how to move logs without tools by now.

Aoshima was observing a work crew building a brick house on top of a hill.

He'll be Brick Pig. Since I don't plan on anyone getting killed, he'll receive the worst fate of all…. Getting the other pigs as roommates.

Tamiya and Otaki had finished putting together their new home. A one-room house, made of hay. There was a door opening and some window openings, but nothing used to close them.

"It may not last more than a year, but it'll do for now!" Otaki said before slapping Tamiya on the back.

"Yup! We're awesome!" Tamiya said before slapping Otaki's back.

"Excuse me, but I need to inspect your… home," Belldandy's voice said.

The Duo turned around and saw Belldandy, wearing a light blue shirt, denim jeans, two belts with one of them holding various equipment, a construction helmet and a reflective vest that read, 'Building inspector'. Tamiya and Otaki looked at each other for a moment before shrugging, stepping to the side, and gesturing to their home.

The hell?

Belldandy walked over to the hay house, pulled out a clipboard, and walked around the house. The more she wrote, the more Tamiya and Otaki got worried. Eventually, she stopped and returned to the duo.

"Well? Tamiya asked.

"It's good, right?" Otaki asked.

Belldandy took a deep breath before she said, "First of all, you used Hay as a building material. You're supposed to use Straw. Hay is used as a grass crop used for food for wildlife and is moist. Straw is made of dried stalks of cereal grains like wheat, barley, oats, or rye. It's mostly used as bedding for farm animals."

She then gestured to the house. "Second. I suspect from design, you're trying to make a Kutcha house.. Is that right?"

Tamiya and Otaki nodded.

Belldandy nodded before continuing. "You neglected to realize that Kutcha house requires other materials like mud and bamboo. Not just grass, thatch, and straw."

Belldandy removed a sheet of paper and handed it to the duo. "I cannot approve of this house. Please tear it down and try again."

She then talked away.

"Dang. All that work…" Otaki muttered as he and Tamiya read the paper.

"And we pretty much got everything wrong…" Tamiya muttered.

She was supposed to be the big bad wolf. I had an oversized wolf costume ready for her. It wasn't a sexy one, just a dopey one where her head stuck out of a wolf mouth.

Keiichi was using a rag to clean the sweat off his face as he stood proudly in front of the Log Cabin he built. It wasn't a fancy-looking one, but one that did look quite sturdy.

Hey! That's supposed to be a shitty little house made of sticks!

"When have I ever done things half-assed?" Keiichi asked.

I seem to recall your attempt at cooking being a meal of dried ramen and ketchup.

"Cooking and building are two different skill sets," Keiichi replied.

Before anyone could say anything, Belldandy appeared, saying, "Hello! I'm a Building Inspector!"

And so Belldandy inspected the Log Cabin, found it faulty, made Keiichi's efforts entirely pointless, forcing him to move in with his sister, which got him humiliated by all his guy friends, which made Megumi talk with their girlfriends, which got all of Keiichi's guy friends dumped, which got Keiichi hated until he moved back with his parents, and filled him with so much shame he became a hikikomori.

"That's… not what happened," Belldandy said as she gave Keiichi a paper that approved of his building. "He built it to code."

She then smiled at Keiichi and said, "So… are you doing-"

Blow his house down. Do it.

"No," Belldandy replied before briskly walking away.

Eh. At least I prevented them from dating.

"Why? Why do that?" Keiichi asked.

Small victories, Morisato, small victories.

Aoshima observed Belldandy taking notes on his brick house. He did find it odd she was keeping her distance from his future home.

Belldandy then walked over to Aoshima and said, "I'm condemning this house. Not only is all the building materials all counterfeit, but the hill is very unstable because of all the construction of the house and weight of the house. I'm scared that the house will fall apart if hit with something like a thrown rock."

Aoshima scoffed, "Oh please. I made sure it will stay standing, no matter what. I'll prove it."

And so, he picked up a rock and threw it.

His house made all sorts of creaking noises before collapsing like a house of cards.

Huh… I was expecting Keiichi's crap shack to do that, not a brick house. What were those bricks made of? Tofu so poorly made that not even discount Faux-Japanese restaurants would use them?

Aoshima stared at the remains of his house as they fell down the hill it was on.

"Well, I guess my business is done he-" Belldandy said before Aoshima grabbed one of her arms. "Let me go, Mr. Aoshima."

"Not until you both have my house rebuilt better than before and approve of it," Aoshima said.

"Sir, let… me…. Go…" Belldandy said in a slight angry growl. With a single blink, her blue human irises changed to a yellow animalistic slit.

"I will be obeyed, you bitch! I will not… Not…" Aoshima uttered before Belldandy shivered and began to expand. He watched on in terror.

She grew in height to about 20 feet tall and her skin was covered in hair. Her fingers ended with claws and her mouth filled with fangs. Her light brown hair shifted to dirty blonde and the four hair antennas became two. The long hair at the back of her head became curly. The Light blue shirt changed to a red one, the Demin pants became shorts…

And the belts became one diamond-encrusted belt with the buckle reading 'K1'.

When Aoshima recalled he had a mouth to speak with, he uttered, "Oh… oh… I… appear to have made a mistake."

"Yes, you have," Big Bad Wolf Maradandy stated before tightly grabbing Aoshima with one hand, causing him to make a cute squeak noise. She then hurled him towards the horizon.

Wait… If she's Maradandy and I'm Mara.. then… how? How could we both exist at the same time? Will I cease to exist if I leave this booth? Will she revert back to Belldandy if I leave it? Lady Hild, can you please tell me what will happen?

Some time later, Keiichi heard a knock at his door. He opened it and there stood a beautiful human woman, dressed in a red leotard, denim pants with only one long leg sleeve, a black jacket, and shackles being used as wristbands. On her face was purple diamonds. One of her eyes was red and the other blue.

"Hi, I'm Maradandy and I was wondering if I could stay here for a little bit?" The woman asked.

-o-

Aoshima was grumbling as he was helping Tamiya and Otaki build a few Kutcha houses.

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Notes from HotelKatz -

This story was one I had been percolating for a while now.

The idea of Big Bad Wolf Maradandy came from a character from Franken Fran, who was a lady named Gavrill and could shapeshift into whatever she felt like, Like going from a beautiful woman into a vicious werewolf-like entity. Please note that Franken Fran is a horror comedy that can get quite bloody.

Vanagandr created and designed Maradandy.