'This may have been a bad idea.'
Nervous hands idly fidgeted with the slightly frayed edges of a well-worn hoodie, fingertips rough and calloused from anxious chewing, blue eyes peeking out from behind a veil of pink hair as they stared at the throng of people lined up in front of them. Letting out a shuddering sigh, Luka drew her hood a little tighter over her head to try and block out the long line of people queued up behind her, her body shivering with nervous energy despite the stifling heat bearing down from the burning sun above.
Luka was currently situated in a very unfamiliar scenario for the usually shut-in girl, the pinkette standing in line to enter one of the biggest music stores in the area, people of all ages and genders lined up for several blocks as they eagerly awaited their chance to enter the building, excitement radiating like waves throughout the sea of humanity around her as the four-story building loomed over them. Everyone, including her, were buzzing with a mix of excitement and nervousness in anticipation of what was at the other end of the line.
Hatsune Miku, her newest live concert Blu-Ray releasing on this very day, was having a special signing at this location, her loyal fans lining up since the early morning for their chance to meet her in person. People from all walks of life, from exuberant young girls, excited to finally see their idol up close, to men and women of all ages, nervously shuffling in place as they clutch their Miku merchandise close to their chests. Everywhere you looked, from the toddler swaddled comfortably in its mother's embrace to the 30-year-old salaryman playing hooky from work, Miku's face could be spotted emblazoned upon their shirts and the copious amounts of merchandise gathered in their arms.
That's how Luka found herself here, Miku herself having informed her of this event several days ago, the teal-haired idol practically buzzing as she gushed about how excited she was for it. Listening to the tealette's enthusiastic rambling, blue eyes alight with unrestrained joy, Luka felt a spark of boldness start to bubble up as a plan began forming in her head.
She wanted to surprise her girlfriend by appearing at the signing, alone and in secret, hoping it would make Miku happy. But, the longer she stood in line, the building looming ever closer with the store's entrance clearly visible now from where she was situated, Luka was starting to have second thoughts. As the chatter of people around her grew louder and louder in her head, Luka could feel her chest constrict with anxious worries, the social recluse feeling horribly exposed amongst the large group of Miku's fans.
What if being here was a mistake? What if she wasn't happy to see her? What if she embarrasses her horribly or worse yet ruins her girlfriend's image? Being seen with her can only be a detriment to the pop idol's popularity. Why couldn't she just have stayed home? She already got to be with Miku in her private life, got to see a side of her few people ever got to see, a special time meant only for them. Why did she have to push what they have? Why did she have to come out and see her?
And why was she refusing to leave?
The shuffling of feet, hundreds of bodies simultaneously moving at the same time, caused Luka to suddenly jerk forward as she was roughly pulled from her thoughts, her momentum carrying her over the threshold of the main doors and into the store's interior. During her internal debate, wondering whether or not she should go home, Luka had failed to notice just how close she was getting to the front of the line. Any real chance to run without making a big scene was gone now as she slowly ambled forward with the rest of the group, the mass of people blocking the entrance behind her feeling like an impenetrable wall, closing off her only means of escape.
"Would you like to buy a copy to have signed?" Jumping slightly in surprise, startled by the sudden appearance of one of the staff members working at the store, the woman holding out a copy of Miku's Concert Blu-ray to Luka with a courteous smile on her face. "Or did you bring something of your own you'd like signed instead?"
Swallowing nervously, put on the spot by the woman's sudden question, Luka felt a cold sweat break on her forehead, her stomach rolling uncomfortably as she anxiously contemplated the worker's question, her heart racing a mile a minute as she felt the lineup of people behind her bear down on her like rising waves against an aging dam. Slipping trembling fingers into her pocket, Luka procured a crumpled wad of bills before nervously holding it up to the staff member, the woman bowing thankfully as she took the desired amount from the assorted denominations of yen.
Handing her a copy of the Concert Blu-ray, Luka's eyes briefly took in the gorgeous artwork of the twin-tailed idol emblazoned upon its cover, Miku's arms outstretched in a joyous cheer with a truly breathtaking smile upon her face, the store attendant smiled kindly at the pinkette as she gestured toward a nearby lineup leading toward Miku's signing desk. Bowing slightly in thanks, the pink-haired recluse quickly shuffled off, the attendant giggling softly as Luka stumbled slightly before taking her spot at the back of the line, the woman amused at what she thought was a fan's nervous first meeting with a celebrity.
Clutching the copy of the Concert Blu-ray tight to her chest, her heartbeat began accelerating to a worrying degree as her anxiousness began to rapidly spike, Luka's fears coming to a head the closer she got to Miku. Her whole body trembled as she took in a series of ragged breaths to try and calm herself down, the plastic of the Blu-ray case crinkling softly as her nervous grip tightened on it, Luka hoping to pull from some dormant strength she may have slumbering deep within herself.
Peeking out from behind the throng of people standing in front of her, the pinkette gulping slightly when she noticed the line was much shorter than she expected, Luka managed to catch a glimpse of Miku at the other end, the twin-tailed idol sitting at her table with a wide and cheerful grin on her face as she greeted the next fan in line with an exuberant and boisterous 'Hi!'. Luka was once again dumbstruck by Miku's beauty and otherworldly aura as she smiled and laughed cheerfully with her fans, adorned in an ornate and stunning dress, the social recluse assuming it must be one she uses for her live shows, its splendor making the young idol stand out like a sparkling star in the dark night sky.
Smiling softly, Luka giggled quietly to herself as she watched Miku interact with her fans, the idol jumping up with excited gusto to join in for photo ops, cooing playfully at the baby nestled comfortably in its mother's arms, and gently coaxing the shier ones into a conversation with clear and engaging questions. Seeing her interact with her fans, how she tries to make every single one of them feel special and unique, the tealette engaged and interested in everyone's stories, helped alleviate some of Luka's worries.
Closing her eyes, holding the Blu-ray close to her chest, a small smile curling on her lips, Luka took some deep and calming breaths. Everything was going to be ok. This was Miku after all. Her Miku.
Everything was going to be fine.
"Are you excited?"
Blue eyes opening wide, Luka stared dumbfounded at the short, skinny girl standing in front of her, her deep, brown eyes sparkling from behind large, round glasses as she grinned excitedly up at the pinkette. Caught off guard by the question, let alone the fact that she hasn't spoken to a stranger since…well since Miku, Luka was only able to stutter out a couple of nonsensical words, the social recluse unsure on what to do or say in such a situation.
"You must be nervous meeting Miku." Sensing the pink-haired girl's nervousness, the bespectacled girl gave her an encouraging smile, her head dipping slightly as she shyly fiddled with the copy of Miku's album clasped within her small hands. "I'm nervous as well."
Not wanting to disappoint the girl and her clearly earnest attempt at wanting to make her feel better, Luka decided to stay quiet about the fact that she gets to see Miku almost every day and in a much more intimate setting, the pinkette deciding to simply give a quiet nod in response. Such information was better to keep secret anyway, for her own as well as Miku's sake.
Not like anyone would believe something so outlandish as Miku dating a girl such as herself anyway.
"But you don't have to worry! Miku is extremely kind! I've been to a ton of her signings and even some of her special events before and she's remembered me every time! She really is the sweetest and most wonderful person so you don't have to worry about a thing."
Listening to the girl ramble, her small body practically vibrating with excitement as she gushed about Miku, Luka couldn't help the small, proud smile that curled on her lips. It made her happy to see how deeply her girlfriend affected others' lives, how it was more than just her music that stuck with her fans, but also her kindness and passion, that intangible feeling of joy she seemed to bestow upon everyone she met. It was what she fell in love with as well after all.
"I was terrified the first time I came to one of these events. I never really had any friends, so I was scared to go see her alone."
Biting her lip, Luka simply nodded her head in agreement, the girl's past painfully mirroring her own experience today, the pink-haired recluse's heart clenching agonizingly in her chest. She knew, all too clearly, how this girl felt. She had lived it after all.
"But," the girl continued, a beaming smile lighting up her features, Luka caught off guard by the sudden shift in her expression, "getting a chance to see my favorite idol, to actually meet her in person, spurred me on and I haven't regretted it since. I even managed to make some friends because of it! If it wasn't for Miku and her music, I don't think I would have ever found the courage to go!"
Closing her eyes, a brilliant smile curling on her lips, cheeks puffed up in an expression of immense joy, the bespectacled girl giggled mirthfully as she proudly held her Miku CD close to her chest.
"Miku truly is the best, isn't she?!"
Swept up by the shorter girl's clear love and passion for the twin-tailed idol, her own hands holding her new Blu-ray a little bit tighter, Luka felt a small smile of her own pull at the corner of her lips as she gently nodded her head in agreement, her mind alight with all the joyous memories she had experienced since meeting Miku.
"She really is."
Nodding enthusiastically at Luka's response, the bespectacled girl dove into an exuberant explanation of how she first found Miku and her music, the pink-haired recluse listening with an attentive and amused smile, clearly enjoying the girl's excited ramblings. The pair engaged in a lively conversation, one consisting of the shorter girl rambling on and on, only stopping occasionally to ask Luka a question before continuing from where she left off, weaving in and out of tangents like a looping racetrack, the topic never straying far from Miku.
Though her part of the conversation was fairly limited, most of it spent listening to the other girl talk, Luka enjoyed her time with her greatly, the smile on her lips never wavering, the social recluse unaware of the line ahead of them growing shorter and shorter until only one person was left ahead of the bespectacled girl. Lifting her head from the conversation, a brief look of surprise crossed the pinkette's features when she noticed how close they had gotten to the front of the line, Miku now completely visible as she finished up with her last fan, the twin-tailed idol waving them off an enthusiastic goodbye before turning her head, shock crossing over her adorable face when she finally notices Luka.
Raising her hand, Luka shyly waved toward her stunned girlfriend, the social recluse giggling softly into the sleeve of her hoodie as Miku's face broke out into an ecstatic grin, the twin-tailed idol trying hard to keep herself from calling out to her, her cheeks puffed up in a strained effort to hold herself back.
A small gasp coming from right in front of her pulled the pink-haired outcast's attention away from the adorable sight to the girl in front of her, her back turned away from the pink-haired shut-in as she bounced happily in place, clutching her album even tighter when she noticed it was finally her turn. With a quick gesture from one of Miku's attendants, Luka's line-mate suddenly rushed forward in a burst of excited energy, the bespectacled girl turning back one last time to wave goodbye to the pinkette with a bright smile.
"Bye! I hope we can see each other again sometime!"
With a small wave of her own, Luka watched with an amused grin as the girl quickly rushed up to Miku's table, the twin-tailed idol breaking out in a large smile of her own as she recognized the girl, jumping out of her seat with her arms lifted high into to the air, pulling her in for a big hug. Seeing the two of them interact, the bespectacled girl practically overflowing with emotion as she watched her idol sign her CD, Miku nodding with rapt attention to every last of her fan's excited rambling, Luka felt a feeling of understanding well over her.
She understood now. Understood why Miku meant so much to them, why they adored and revered her so much, and how Miku, in turn, sincerely loved them back. Their earnest feelings for each other, a bond shared through Miku's music, provided them a place of comfort, a freedom to express themselves through one another. Her fans loved her for her words, expressed beautifully in song, while she loved them for their support, for giving a voice to all of her emotions, letting her know they were shared.
Lowering her head, a soft breath passing her lips as she smiled softly, Luka knew she would be ok now, that her fears would be easily quelled, that her anxiety will remain dormant should Miku ever be too busy to hang out. Because she'll know Miku is doing what she loves for the people who love her just as much, that she is happy.
And that made her happy as well.
"Next, please!"
Snapping her head up, Luka stared ahead wide-eyed in surprise, the social recluse so lost in her thoughts she completely forgot that she was next in line, the attendant off to the side of Miku's table waving her over with a friendly, albeit slightly impatient, smile. Lurching forward with heavy, unsteady steps, Luka slowly ambled her way over to Miku's signing table, the twin-tailed idol giving her a sly grin as she approached her.
"H-hi…" Luka's voice, barely above a whisper, came out warbled and nervous, fingers shaking slightly as the social recluse silently placed her copy of Miku's concert Blu-ray onto the table. With an impish smile, mouth curled up in one corner, Miku took the offered Blu-ray in hand, removing the cap from her marker with an audible 'pop'.
"So, may I ask who it's for?" Miku asked, a coy smile on her lips as she looked up at Luka with a droll, knowing look in her eyes. Placing her hand over her mouth, Luka giggled softly into the sleeve of her hoodie at Miku's ridiculous antics, earning an amused smile from the teal-haired idol.
"Thank you for buying my new concert movie." Scribbling her autograph upon the cover of the case with practiced ease, the lines of her name dancing upon the surface like a brilliant skater on ice, Miku gave the pink-haired recluse a comically sultry look. "I'm grateful for having such a lovely fan as you."
Shyly averting her gaze, a soft pink hue dusting her pale cheeks, Luka blushed, corny as the line may have been, at the not-so-subtle implications in Miku's words. Even something with such a veiled meaning, which may come off as simple teasing or casual flirting to anyone else, Luka was acutely aware of just how genuine Miku's words were. Either way, exaggeratedly cheesy as they may have been, they still filled her with an immense feeling of joy.
"I've always admired you." Smiling softly back at her, hands placed gently over her heart, Luka's voice came out quiet and meek, but the richness and honesty of her words still carried like a loudspeaker to Miku's ears. "I think you are absolutely wonderful."
Grinning brilliantly, the tips of her ears turning a light pink from how sweet and adorable her girlfriend was being at this moment, Miku slid the newly signed copy of her concert Blu-ray back across the table to Luka. As Luka bowed her head slightly in thanks, gently taking her new prized possession into her hands, the twin-tailed idol caught her pink-haired girlfriend by surprise as she suddenly jumped out of her seat, rounding the table with astounding speed to press herself firmly into the bewildered shut-in's side.
"Picture time!" Shouting loudly, a lilt of amusement in her voice, Miku sneakily nicked her girlfriend's phone from her hoodie's pocket, deftly swiping open the camera app in one single motion as she held the device out in front of them. Leaning in close, pressing the side of her face gently upon the pinkette's own cool skin, cheeks smushed lightly together, Miku shot the camera a dazzling smile, pulling the stunned pinkette closer as she wrapped her arm around her waist.
Staring into her own dumbstruck visage, wide eyes and red face reflected back at her upon her phone's screen, the world around Luka became a hazy, blurry mess, any and all sound drowned out by the rushing of blood in her ears as her heart beat like a jackhammer in her chest. Seeing the two of them on the screen, her frazzled features clashing with Miku's beautifully done-up makeup and dress, Luka felt slightly star-stuck by the twin-tailed idol, seeing just what kind of a different beast the tealette was in a professional setting.
It was dazzling.
Making sure everything was framed perfectly, gently pulling down Luka's hoodie, Miku softly whispered into her girlfriend's ear, the idol's breath ghosting delicately over her inflamed cheeks as she pressed down on the shutter button.
"I'm so proud of you."
The gentle click of the picture being taken was drowned out by the tealette's tender words drifting into her ear, her face glowing a bright crimson as her heart radiated a feeling of overwhelming joy and love, the moment forever immortalized in a snapshot between her and Miku. Biting her lip to stifle a choked sob, tears pooling in the corner of her eyes, Luka felt her chest illuminate with a gentle warmth, the icy sickness in her heart melting ever so slightly from the twin-tailed girl's words. Words, so simple and small, that meant everything to her.
Words she hadn't heard in a very long time.
"At the back of the store, you'll find a woman with short brown hair and a stunning red outfit." Handing Luka back her phone, letting her hands linger for just a fleeting moment upon the social recluse's gently calloused fingertips, Miku quickly turned her back to the crowd of onlookers, subtly pointing toward a seemingly random place in the distance. "Go see her. She'll take care of you."
Shooting her a confused look, unsure what to make of this sudden request, Luka simply nodded her head in understanding, deciding to trust in Miku. It has always worked out so far. Bounding backward with almost unnatural grace, Miku bid the pink-haired recluse a cheerful and exuberant goodbye, the twin-tailed girl once again in full idol mode as she plopped herself back into her seat, greeting the next fan in line with the same enthusiasm and excitement as everyone else before them.
Smiling gently at the scene, Luka took one last look at the tealette's beaming face before making her way toward where Miku had pointed to mere moments ago, the excited chatter and murmurs of the crowd slowly fading into the distance as she wandered deeper into the stores interior. The usually bustling and crowded aisles of the store were unnaturally quiet, the entire building sparsely occupied due to the signing event, everyone, including many of the workers, situated close to the entrance or with Miku. Keeping her head on a swivel, trying to remember Miku's description of who she was to find, Luka's sapphire gaze eventually caught sight of a tall, brown-haired woman leaning casually against the back wall of the store, the brilliant red shine of her dress practically a homing beacon, and yet she seemed to be all on her own.
Nervously shuffling her way over to her, trepidation and fear practically radiating off of her in waves, Luka awkwardly lifted her hand in greeting as she neared the intimidating woman, the social recluse flinching slightly as her piercing stare turned to regard her with a questioning stare.
"I..I..Mi..Mi..ku…she…I…she told me to…" Stumbling over her words, the sentence fragmented and broken like cracked pavement, Luka tried to relay what Miku had said to her, shame and disgust welling up within her as she failed to even utter a single, coherent sentence. What could this woman possibly be thinking of her at this moment? How stupid must she look right now, disheveled and unkempt, a walking bundle of nerves and fears, unable to tell her something as simple as 'Miku told me to meet you.'
Though, to Luka's immense surprise, the intimidating brunette shot the stuttering girl a disarming smile as she pushed herself away from the wall, casually strolling up to the slightly shorter girl with a confident and natural swagger. Bowing slightly in greeting, one Luka quickly reciprocated with an awkward one of her own, the woman rested her hand casually on her cocked hip, radiating a strange feeling of confidence and casual kindness.
"So, you must be the girlfriend." Sputtering very undignified in surprise, her face lighting up a glowing crimson, Luka was completely caught off guard by the woman's words, having not expected someone else to know about her and Miku's relationship. Giggling mirthfully at the pinkette's animated reaction, a small, demure giggle passing her painted, red lips, the older woman took an instant liking to her.
"My name is Meiko. I'm Miku's manager. It's nice to finally meet you, Luka." Giving the obviously frazzled girl a gentle smile, Meiko casually strolled over to a nearby door, briefly looking over her shoulder as she waved over the befuddled social recluse. "Please, follow me."
Hopping to attention at the older woman's request, Luka quickly shuffled after the crimson-donned manager, Meiko ushering her through a series of twisting and winding backroom hallways, the walls painted the same dull shade of off-white, making the pink-haired girl feel as if they were stuck in a never-ending loop of the same corridors and doorways. Finally, though it had only been a couple of seconds, the pair arrived at one of the many similar-looking doors, the only distinguishing feature being the plate with Miku's name emblazoned on it hanging off of it.
"This is Miku's Green Room. You can wait here until she's done." Meiko spoke as she led the pinkette into a nondescript, yet spacious, dressing room, a variety of snacks and refreshments neatly placed and arranged on a nearby coffee table, a soft giggle passing the older woman's lips as her charge came to mind. "Though it could take awhile until she is. Miku insists on giving every fan her utmost attention."
Smiling back at Meiko, the older woman caught slightly off guard by the previously awkward girl's sudden change in demeanor, Luka simply stared wistfully into the distance, her head filled with thoughts of the twin-tailed idol and her brilliant smile.
"That's just who she is."
A soft smile curled on Meiko's lips as she gently nodded her head in agreement with the pink-haired girl, her own memories of the tealette running through her mind, the frustrations of her charge constantly delaying their appointments and daily plans always falling away once she saw her interact with her fans. It was a gentle reminder that, though it may have been a while now since she herself had been exactly in the same spot Miku was now and how much she had cherished those moments.
As Meiko made her way to leave, deciding to give the socially awkward girl a bit of privacy, Luka, in a burst of confidence, suddenly stepped forward, catching the brown-haired woman's attention.
"Um…Miss Meiko, would you be able to keep me company for a bit?" Nervously wringing her hands, her earlier courage slowly waning as her voice grew softer and more subdued, Luka nevertheless managed to deliver her request to the crimson-donned manager. "There were some questions I was hoping you'd be able to answer."
"Sure." Grinning slightly at the pinkette's show of courage, spurned on by her client's choice of a romantic partner as well as her own growing endearment toward the shy girl, Meiko gently closed the door behind her, gesturing for Luka to sit at the nearby arrangement of couches. As Luka awkwardly seated herself on the olive green couch, its cushions stiff and uncomfortable, Meiko grabbed them a couple of drinks from the fridge, placing a bottle of green tea in front of the social recluse before taking a seat on the couch opposite her.
"So, what would you like to know?" Crossing her legs, giving off an air of casualness, Meiko spoke in a calm and friendly tone, hoping to ease some of the pinkette's frazzled nerves. Now that she was here, with the chance to learn more about Miku, about a part of her life so far from her own, of a past not yet shown to her, Luka was unsure where to start.
"What is Miku like…like before a show?" Sputtering out the first question that came to mind, Luka was relieved when she saw Meiko smile softly as she momentarily mulled over the question, the older woman gently toying with the cap of her drink, long fingernails trailing along its grooved rim.
"For most of the day leading up to the show, she is usually fairly relaxed. She hangs out with the crew or goes and introduces herself to the venue staff. On the first day of the tour, she will also meet and get to know the members of her opening act, the whole time dressed in the most unassuming and comfortable outfit imaginable."
Laughing softly at the image of Miku in her oversized sweater with only a pair of shorts and black leggings underneath, Meiko's smile slowly became wistful, the glint of mirth in her brown eyes dulling slightly.
"But, as showtime nears, Miku always spends the last hour or so before her set alone. I think she does it to give herself time to center herself, to prepare herself for the big moment. Oftentimes she can be found just staring at the floor or the mirror with a contemplative gaze. And just before she goes on stage, Miku never fails to give a big, enthusiastic cheer, rousing her band members with energy before taking the stage herself in one of her many grand and dramatic entrances."
Staring at the coffee table's surface with a contemplative gaze, sapphire eyes idly tracing the multitude of scratches and water stains littering the aged wood, Luka slowly digested what Meiko had told her. She had never experienced her girlfriend in such a way, the twin-tailed girl was always a bundle of energy and boundless cheer, the moments in between filled with her caring and comforting words, with gentle touches and hugs.
The image of Miku, silently sequestered in solitude, sat uncomfortably in Luka's stomach.
"How did you come to work with Miku?" Deciding to press on with her questioning, her curiosity spiked from just the little tidbits she already managed to obtain from Meiko's answer, Luka wanted to learn as much as she could about the twin-tailed idol.
"I was one of the many scouts interested in signing her and her band after their victory in the National Song Competition. There was some stiff competition from some of the other labels but, luckily for me, Miku was already a fan of mine from when I was an idol so I had the upper hand."
A look of shock passed Luka's features as Meiko giggled to herself, the crimson-clad manager still proud of her victory back then, the social recluse unaware she was speaking so casually to a former idol, a fact she failed to pick up on completely.
"While the whole band was impressive," Meiko continued, obvious to the pinkette's silent revelation, shifting into a more comfortable position, resting her back against the back of the couch, "Miku was the one everyone focused on. She was the one everyone truly wanted and I fear that may have been a factor in their eventual split, though the main problem was their contrasting visions on where the band should go creatively."
Nodding her head thoughtfully, remembering hearing something similar from Miku before, Luka was worried that Miku might harbor some guilt for what happened, that it was her fault that her band decided to split up. With the world watching only her, drawn in by her natural spark and charm, pushed by her own desire for creativity and to branch out of her comfort zone, did she feel that she may be the reason they left?
"Miku truly is a marvel to behold, always working on her craft, never idling for long, always looking to either improve or reinvent herself. I believe that her fans pick up on that, that it makes them gravitate to her and her music, that you just can't help but cheer her on."
Unbeknownst to herself, Luka found herself leaning in closer as Meiko continued to speak, the pinkette fascinated by every new facet she learned about her girlfriend, her insights helping to shape a clearer picture of the twin-tailed idol, of Miku, in her mind.
"At first, the record company was worried about her constant fluctuations in style, afraid that it would impact her sales or even lose some of her loyal listeners. But, everything she did, every change she made, every new reinvention she went through, was met with an even bigger following than before."
Grinning widely, a sense of pride welling up within her at her charge's accomplishments, Meiko's descriptions became more exuberant and flowery, Luka unable to help but get swept along by the former idol's enthusiasm.
"I think the reason why that is, is because of Miku's love for her fans and her love for music truly comes through with everything she does, the signing happening right now being a perfect example. I guarantee you, every single person here today, every one of her fans, will be touched in some way by her love and excitement."
Blushing slightly, thinking of her own interaction with Miku, remembering the girl she met in line, how much the twin-tailed idol had affected her life, Luka knew without a doubt that what Meiko was saying was the truth. Something about Miku drew people in. She had an innate ability to make you feel important, to affect you in ways you couldn't even comprehend and, in her case, she made her fall in love with her.
"While Miku really does give everything her all," Meiko continued, her gaze turning to regard the pinkette with a soft, yet pained smile, Luka staring back at her in confusion, "I'm glad she has someone like you, Luka."
A look of perplexed confusion washed over Luka's features, the pinkette confused by the brown-haired woman's statement, sapphire eyes alight with doubt and bewilderment. Someone like her? What could a social outcast, a stain upon the world such as herself possibly do for Miku?
"Miku used to be so focused on her music, so dedicated to her work and her fans, that she never really had time just for herself and her own happiness."
Averting her gaze slightly, brown eyes staring vacantly into the distance, Meiko's expression shifted into a look of deep sadness, her crimson-red lips drawn into a thin line. Heaving a heavy sigh, the older woman's shoulders sagging dramatically, Meiko leaned forward, resting her elbow on her legs as she placed her half-finished drink on the table.
"Miku she…she's had a harder life than people might think, probably more than either you or I even know. All the fame, the expectations, all those eyes watching you at all times, all the people relying on you, they come with a lot of sacrifices, chief among them being her ability to open up to others with her problems."
A soft gasp passed Luka's lips, a painful stab rending her heart from Meiko's revelation, a dark, vile sickness traveling up her throat, her vision briefly swimming as guilt and shame bubbled up within her stomach. She was one of those people, one of the leeches attached to Miku's body, taking whatever they could from her, selfishly robbing her of happiness and joy for their own gain, the tealette too sweet, too kind to deny them while she wallows in her own misery alone.
"She tries to keep everything in, to be strong for everyone else, to be their rock, to be the one they rely on, whether she was hurting or not. She never really had anyone else in life she could turn to, her only real outlet for her feelings was her music."
Placing her hand over her mouth, tears stinging her eyes, Luka felt her entire being grow cold as she thought of Miku, of what she had to endure. She had a feeling Miku was hiding some kind of pain deep within, that her kindness and understanding could not solely have been born from a generous heart, but from one that had been scarred itself. Luka hated herself for not reaching out to her when she could have, for becoming another one of the twin-tailed girls' many burdens, her stomach rolling with a vile concoction of self-loathing and deep regret.
Gripping the front of her hoodie tight, swallowing the bitter sensation resting upon her tongue, Luka vowed at that moment to change, to be better, to support Miku in every way she could. She didn't want to keep taking, she didn't want to keep being a burden, she wanted to help, to be someone Miku could rely on. She wasn't an idiot, she knew it wouldn't be easy, that she would end up leaning on Miku for a while longer. But she would keep moving, to one day walk side by side with Miku, to carry each other forward.
"But," snapping out of her reverie at the sudden change in Meiko's tone, Luka was surprised to find a bright smile curling on her painted lips, "in the last couple of months, there has been a renewed spark in her eyes. Whenever she wasn't talking about music or her next show, the only thing she could talk about was you, Luka."
Heat immediately flushed Luka's face a dark red, the pinkette quickly averting her gaze, trying in vain to hide the growing smile on her face, her fingers idly twirling strands of pink hair as her heart radiated a brilliant warmth throughout her body.
"I hope the two of you can keep getting along for a long time." Giggling softly at the pink-haired girl's reaction, Meiko couldn't help but smile at the adorable sight, happy to see such a sweet romance blossom in front of her eyes, especially for someone so dear to her. "You seem like a great fit for each other. Once she is ready, I'm sure she will tell you everything about herself."
Gripping the edge of her hoodie tight, trying desperately to push down her embarrassment, the pink-haired recluse was about to ask another question when a sudden rush of footsteps and the loud clang of the Green Room's door being wrenched open distracting the conversing pair, both of them turning to see Miku burst into the room in a flurry of activity. Slamming the door loudly behind her, Miku's eyes quickly scanned the room before laying eyes upon her target, a bright smile breaking out on her face as she quickly rushed to Luka's side, bounding over to her in only a couple of steps, twin-tails flowing behind her like brilliant streaks of teal.
Practically leaping onto the couch, unaffected by its rough padding, Miku pulled the startled Luka in for a big hug, happily nuzzling her cheek into the flustered recluse's chest. Smiling at the young pair's interaction, Meiko quietly excused herself as she silently exited the room, Miku's elated giggles resonating through the room as she closed the door behind her. Leaning back against the wall next to the door, Meiko dutifully stood guard in case anyone tried to interrupt the loving couple, the crimson-garbed manager grinning as Miku's excited laughter drifted through the empty hallway.
How she had missed hearing it.
"Luka-chan! I'm so amazingly proud of you!" Snuggling closer to Luka, squeezing her tight, Miku showered the stuttering recluse with a constant barrage of love and affection. She was just so proud of her! "I was so happy to see you here. It's one of the best surprises I have ever gotten."
All Luka could do in response was nonsensically stutter and stammer, her senses overloaded from the feeling of Miku so close to her, the gentle smell of strawberries wafting from her hair, the sweet words falling from her lips. It was a veritable potpourri of making Luka's brain shut down and causing her tongue to be stuck in her throat.
"This has made my day ten times better." Leaning up, catching the pink-haired recluse by surprise, Miku placed a gentle kiss upon Luka's cheek. "I'm so unbearably happy right now!"
Lighting up like a burning supernova, Luka felt like her heart was going to explode from her chest, her entire being alight with overwhelming love and affection for the giggling tealette by her side, feelings she could sparsely believe she would ever feel again after her life of seclusion and loneliness. It was all because of her, because of Miku, sweet, wonderful Miku, that she was able to feel like this again, to experience life again, to know once again what it meant to be happy.
She gave her hope. Luka hopes she can give her back something too.
"M-Miku-chan," pulling out slightly from the hug, a light dusting of pink on her cheek as Miku looked up at her with wide, expectant eyes, Luka pulled at the last reserve of courage she had, hoping to do something to make her girlfriend happy, "w-would you go on a date with me?"
Gasping in shock, hands flying up to cover her mouth, a brief silence fell over the pair as Miku stared at her girlfriend with glittering blue eyes, momentarily stunned that Luka would be the one to take the initiative, let alone for something out in public. Miku's face beamed brightly as she graced the pinkette with a mile-wide grin, before suddenly lunging at Luka with a boisterous cry, holding the pinkette close as she yelled out her answer with unrestrained joy.
"YES!"
'This was a mistake.'
Nervously pacing her room, fingers anxiously pulling at errant strands of hair sticking out from behind her pulled-up hoodie, Luka felt the rising bile in her throat threaten to choke her as a tide of dread began flooding her head with doubts and fears. Falling into a seated crouch, black jeans, stiff from disuse, scratching uncomfortably against delicate skin, Luka felt like her heart was going to explode as she took deep, struggling breaths.
A couple of days had passed since Luka invited Miku out on a date, the pink-haired recluse spending the days in between in a perpetual twilight between quiet excitement and rancid fear, the days till the planned meeting ticking down agonizingly slow and terrifyingly fast at the same time. With her emotions pulled taut as a piano string, the smallest of pressures enough to cause her to snap, when the day finally arrived, the frayed edges of Luka's fragile emotions threatened to snap.
She wanted to do this, She wanted to make Miku happy, to give her a memory she could cherish, to show her how much she means to her, how much she loved and adored her. She wanted to let her know she was there for her, that it was ok to lean on her if she needed to, to open up to her and share her burden. She wanted to do something right for once.
But her head would not let her be, its thorny vines too deeply entrenched, poking and stabbing at her with nonstop fears and worries, spreading its poison through her body with anxious sickness. These bramble vines would never let her rest, ripping and tearing at her skin whenever she tried to free herself from its stranglehold upon her mind, determined to see her lifeblood drain from her, to see the crimson droplets fall upon the ruins of her crumbled existence.
Heaving a deep, shuddering breath, Luka feebly reached for her phone, her body shaking as a cold sensation pierced her veins, her body screaming at her to hide away, to let this day pass. Pushing through her fears, fingers trembled as Luka quickly typed out a message to Miku, admitting all of her fears and worries for the upcoming date, the pink-haired recluse fighting against every scream and pull from the thorny vines as they tried to force her back into bed, to a life of solitude where it was safe.
Resting her head against her knees, tears threatening to spill from her eyes as she remained frozen in place, unable to move forward, unable to run away, simply stuck. Luka didn't have to wait long for Miku's response, the gentle ping of a received message echoing through her empty room, the pink-haired girl read over her girlfriend's response, the vines stranglehold upon her body growing slack as she talked through her worries, slowly alleviating her fears until she was able to finally move forward.
Getting back to her feet, her body feeling light, unrestrained, the pinkette sent Miku one final message, a bright smile curling on her lips as she slid her phone back into her pocket, Luka stepped out of her bedroom door, closing it behind her with a gentle click.
'I'm heading out now.'
A/N: Moving forward, one step at a time.
Welp, once again, I'm sorry for the long delay. My new job has kept me very busy, and very tired, leaving less time and creativity for me to get any writing done. It took a while for me to find a groove with this chapter, since it was one of my favorites when I laid it out, so I didn't want to rush it or try forcing myself to write which would just create an unsatisfactory end product for everyone. With any luck, the next one won't take as long to come out.
In this chapter we finally see Luka be the one to take the initiative with her life, doing things outside of her comfort zone to make not only herself but Miku happy as well. Luka is aware of her need to change, to not simply rely on Miku for everything but to also be the one to make things happen. While she still has to rely on Miku for some things, it is all done with her own will to change, to want to be better. Even if it's small steps, they are steps going forward.
Next chapter: First Dates.
Thank you all for your continued support. I love writing this story, though it may not seem that way with how long each chapter takes, and I love sharing it with everyone. I hope everyone enjoys it and I hope to see you when the next one drops. Have a great day and I love you!