Chapter 48

Jaime Lannister POV

I'm not sure it's a good idea for Cersei to stay at the apartment for most of the summer, but then again maybe it is. I want her to do what's best for her, but I don't trust her to do that. If we were still together, I would've taken her home with me. It's not something I get a vote on anymore, though. I'm starting to accept that.

Tyrion and I are heading home today, we finished with finals but haven't gotten our grades back. I'm surprised Tyrion is coming home since he still hates father, but I know he has other reasons for coming back and they usually don't have to interact much. I know he'll be relieved to know that Cersei won't be coming with us.

I pick Tyrion up from him and Oberyn's place and he gets in the car. He and Oberyn are still really close, which makes me happy. He deserves to have good friends. Tyrion sees that the passenger seat is empty and looks puzzled. He gets in and sits next to me.

"Hey," he says. He looks behind him and sets his bag down in the backseat. "Where is Cersei?"

"She's not coming home," I say, pulling up the directions and putting my phone on its car stand. "She wanted to stay here."

"Why would she do that?" Tyrion asks as I start to drive.

"She said she had no reason to go home," I say. "Dany isn't talking to her."

"Really?" Tyrion asks. "How much have I missed?"

I pause. I haven't told him much because I'm also ashamed. I really don't feel like explaining it. "Cersei was a lot to handle with her partying and her drug use," I say. "I think it got too much for Dany, and she realized that Cersei really hasn't been a great friend to her lately."

"Still," Tyrion says. "It must be pretty bad if Dany is cutting her off."

"Maybe it's not forever," I say, even though I know it is. "But Dany does seem pretty done with her."

I feel bad not explaining the whole situation to Tyrion, but I really don't want to admit it all. I just want to move on, it's been hard enough telling Brienne and then coming clean to Dany.

"Are you worried about Cersei staying here?" Tyrion asks after a pause.

"I am," I say. "But I want her to do what's best for her, and I know I can't talk her out of it. Maybe having some time to herself will be good for her." I'm not sure I believe that, but I'm hoping.

I think Tyrion can sense that I don't really want to talk much about Cersei. I still care about her, but I am kinda relieved she won't be around as much. I feel terrible for thinking that, but it's true. She's put me through a lot.

"Are you excited to see Brienne?" Tyrion asks me.

"Definitely," I say. "I miss her, I really think she makes me a better person."

"How so?"

I sigh because I don't want to fully get into it. "She helps me be honest with myself," I say. "I'm starting to understand more what was so bad about my relationship with Cersei."

"You told her about that?"

"Yeah," I say. "I wanted her to know, and if she's going to be around the family it's something she has a right to know about."

"Wow, that's crazy," Tyrion says. "What was her reaction?"

"She actually tried to understand why something like that would happen," I say. "I don't think she really does understand, but she's given me more compassion and grace than I ever have deserved."

"Sounds like it," Tyrion says. That kinda hurts to hear that he agrees, but it is the truth. "So you think she might be around a while?"

"I hope so," I say. "I'm not overly serious with her, but she's incredible and I don't want to lose her again like before."

"Yeah, she probably wouldn't give you a third chance."

"And she shouldn't," I say. "I wouldn't deserve one, I didn't deserve a second chance."

There's a long pause. "I'm glad you're moving on from Cersei," Tyrion says. "I know she'll always be in our lives, but it's about time you detached from her a little."

"It's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life," I say. "But it's the right thing to do."

I know Tyrion means well, and it's good that he's honest with me. This is still just a sad situation. I thought Cersei and I were in this for life, and now I'm having to reconstruct everything I thought my life would be. I still think of her first in every plan I make, my mind is trained that way and it's going to take a while to break out of that.

Despite how hard this is, I'm excited for this new phase of my life. I feel like I can finally find my own identity. Like Tyrion said, Cersei will always be in our lives, but I can finally figure out who I am without her attached to me. I can finally focus solely on what I want. It's scary because I've never done that, but it feels good and freeing.

Daenerys Targaryen POV

Jon and I are coming home today, we just wrapped up with finals and Sansa's graduation is coming up. She has finals this coming week, and her graduation is next weekend. We're stopping at his place so I can say hi to Sansa, and I'll eventually go to my dad's house and stay there.

"Hey, I wanted to ask about something," Jon says as we're driving home. I look at him. "Do you mind if I stop by Sam's house while you're hanging out with Sansa?"

"No," I say. "I'm sure he'd love to see you."

"Yeah, I haven't seen him or the kiddo in a while," Jon says. "I can pick you up and drive you back to your dad's place after we're done hanging out."

"Or Sansa could drive me back," I say. "Whatever works best."

"I'll say hi to my family and then head over to Sam's," he says. "If that works."

"Totally."

We pull up and knock on the door. Sansa answers and looks so happy sees me. "Dany!" She says, hugging me.

"Sure," Jon says, walking past us. "Don't say hi to your own brother."

"Hi, Jon," she says, side hugging him. "What are you guys doing."

"I'm heading to Sam's house," Jon says. "Dany was hoping she could hang out with you here while I'm there."

"Of course," Sansa says. "Arya's at a fencing thing, so it'll just be us."

"Bye guys," Jon says. "I'll be back later."

"Bye!" Sansa call out, and I wave Jon goodbye as we head to her room.

"You're coming to my graduation, right?" Sansa asks as she closes the door behind us.

"Of course," I say. "I'm really proud of you."

"Aw thanks mom," she says jokingly. We sit on her bed. "Did you ever ask your aunt about using her place for the trip this summer."

Shit. I forgot about that. "No, I'm so sorry," she says. "I can literally call her right now."

"You don't have to right now," Sansa says. "It's not even June yet."

"I'll ask her tonight," I say. "We can probably use the house for mid-July."

"Only if it's okay," she says. "If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out." I know she'd be really disappointed if it didn't, and I did tell her I would ask.

"I'll call her tonight," I say. "I promise. She hardly stays there anymore, I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

"Okay," Sansa says. "Thank you."

"Who exactly would be coming?" I ask. "She'll probably want to know."

"Me, you, Margaery, Arya, and Myrcella," she says. "And I guess Cersei can if you want."

I pause. I guess she doesn't know what happened. "Oh," I say. "Cersei and I aren't friends anymore."

"What?" Sansa asks. "Why? You guys grew up together."

I pause again. I can't bring myself to tell her the full truth, it's not something she should hear from me if at all. "I just realized how toxic she was," I say. "She got worse as time went on."

"Wow, worse?" Sansa asks. "I mean, I'm sorry. She was just already pretty bad."

I sigh. "Yeah, she got worse," I say. "I get it, though. She was never a very nice or warm person."

"I'm still sorry," she says. "It must be hard to lose someone you were so close to."

"It really has been," I say. There's another pause. I kinda want to change the subject. "But yeah, I'll ask my aunt about the trip tonight."

"Awesome," Sansa says. "Thanks."

"Is Arya okay with you inviting Margaery?" I ask.

"I think she'll be fine," Sansa says. "We did talk about it, it's probably one of the last times she'll have to see her."

"Okay," I say. "As long as she's fine with it. I'm sure it'll work out."

"I really hope it does," Sansa says. "A going away trip would be super fun."

"Definitely," I say. "You deserve it."

I'm glad I still have Sansa, she's a great friend. I hope the trip works out. I hope it's not too awkward with Arya and Margaery, but if Sansa says Arya can handle it, I believe her. Arya is usually pretty mature about those things, more so than Margaery.

It still hurts losing Cersei, and it hurts even more having to talk about it. Maybe Jon or Bran will tell Sansa what happened, but I don't think it should come from me. I think we all deserve to just be happy and content in life, maybe one day we'll get there.

Jon Snow Stark POV

I feel bad for lying to Dany, but I'm not going to Sam's house and I couldn't tell her where I'm actually going. I'm so scared, I really don't think I've ever been this nervous. This feels like the longest drive ever, and her dad doesn't live that far. I'm just worried she'll get Sansa to drive her back earlier than expected and she'll find me there.

I pull up and I sit in my car for a minute, taking deep breaths. What if this goes horribly? What if he says no? Would I really let that stop me? How do I even ask? I didn't really prepare much for this and I've obviously never done this before, so I'm not sure what I'll say exactly. I think it's best to just do it, whatever happens is what happens.

I walk up and knock on the door. I'm not even sure he's home, but he knows we're coming back today. After a few seconds, he slowly opens the door. He looks puzzled and surprised to see me, he even looks slightly behind me to see if Dany is with me.

"Jon?" He asks. "I didn't know you guys were back this early. Where's Daenerys?"

"She's with my sister," I say. I'm shaking, I wonder if he can tell I'm terrified. "I actually wanted to talk to you alone."

He pauses, I can tell he's confused. "Is Daenerys okay?" He asks.

"Yes, she's fine," I say. "But she doesn't know I'm here. Can I come in?"

"Oh, of course," he says. I come in and we sit at the table. "Do you want some water?"

That actually would help a lot. "Sure," I say. "Thank you."

He walks into the kitchen. "Ice?" He calls out.

"No, thanks," I say. "I'm good." It feels like he's in there forever, but he eventually comes out and sits down, he sets the water down across from me.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" He asks me.

I take a sip of my water. "So um," I say. "You know Dany and I have been together for a long time."

"How many years has it been?"

"Three," I say. "I really love her."

"I'm sure you do," he says. "I'm sorry I haven't been around as much as I should've. I feel terrible about that."

I didn't expect him to say that, and I'm not sure how to respond. I know Dany doesn't resent him, but it was hard on her.

"I understand," I say. "I know Dany does too, she doesn't resent you."

"I'm glad, but still," he says. "I'm really glad you were there to support her, and I know she appreciates it too."

I just nod, and there's a pause. "So, what I wanted to talk to you about," I say. "I wanted to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"Would it be okay with you, um," I say. I'm so scared, I'm stammering. I just decide to spit it out, otherwise it'll never happen. "Would you be okay with me asking Dany to marry me?"

There's a pause that feels like an eternity, I'm not sure he expected me to ask that. "Really?" Dany's dad finally asks. I nod. "When did you decide this?"

"A while ago," I say. "I think it's the right time to ask. I didn't just decide it yesterday or something." I hope that didn't sound rude, I just want him to know I didn't make a rash decision.

"Wow," he says. "Well, I hope you understand how serious that is. If you're going to ask her, you need to follow through."

"I know," I say. "I'm pretty certain I want to."

"I think you guys might be a little too young for that," he says. "You haven't even graduated yet."

"I thought about that too," I say. "Would it be bad to get engaged and then wait until after college to get married? We could use that time to plan."

He pauses, I can tell he's thinking. "I suppose that's not a bad idea," he says. "I'm not saying you don't have my blessing, I'm saying that you may be a little young."

"I wouldn't want to do it right after, I'd want to wait a bit," I say. "And I'm sure Dany would want to take time to plan the wedding."

"I think she would," her dad says. "So, yes. You have my blessing to do that."

I pause, I feel a sense of relief that I wasn't expecting. "Thank you," I say. "Thank you so, so much Mr. Targaryen."

"I do like you Jon," he says. "And I know Dany loves you so much."

"I love her so much," I say. "I won't let you or her down."

"I hope not."

"Do you have any idea what she would want the ring to look like?" I ask.

"I'm not sure exactly," he says. "But I know she wouldn't want it to be super small. I can Venmo you some money to help."

"Are you sure?" I ask. "You don't have to do that."

"I want to," he says. "I want to help, and I want you to be able to get her something she'd really like."

"I appreciate that," I say. "But only if you can."

"I'll work out logistics, and then I can let you know how much," he says. "Can we exchange numbers?"

"Of course." We give each other our phone numbers and then I start to get up.

"I should probably get going before Dany texts me asking for my plan," I say. "Thank you again."

"Of course, Jon," he says. He shakes my hand. "I'll be talking to you soon."

I walk out and get into my car. I just take a deep breath. I feel so happy, but also a different kind of nervous. Now I'm nervous that this is really happening. I want it to, but it's all becoming very real and a little scary. I'm going to take a bit of time to ring shop and plan what I want to do for the proposal, so I have some time to prepare. I'm nervous, but I'm excited and I feel ready.