Chapter 22 – The Slap Felt Across The Galaxy
Slamming the door of his TARDIS shut, the Time Lord known as the Doctor listened intently as a few stray arrows from Queen Elizabeth's guards thudded into his time ship. He couldn't understand what caused the great English Queen to be so violently against him. After making an enemy of Queen Victoria a couple of years ago, the Doctor resolved to stay away from any Queen of English. Which was a shame, he was due to play a croquet match against the Duke of Edinburgh in a few days.
Elizabeth's army was closing in and whilst there was no danger of them breaching his defences, it was probably a good idea to run away and quickly. Dashing to the console he pulled the switch and the ancient time ship groaned into life, "That was a close one", he mumbled, "not sure what I've done to upset Good Queen Bess but I bet it'll be fun finding out", he added with a grin.
"Is every trip like this", his companion, medical student Martha Jones, wheezed in response, "meeting Shakespeare, saving the world from witches and running away from Queens?"
"Pretty much", the Time Lord shrugged, "well, apart from meeting Shakespeare. Get a bit boring if I met him everyday". His gaze settled on the young student, truthfully when he offered her one trip that's exactly what he meant. The pain of losing Rose was still fresh in his memory and he wasn't willing to open himself up to the potential heart ache if he lost another companion. There was something to his Martha Jones though, clearly she was a bright and intelligent young woman. After all, not everyone could say that Shakespeare had written a sonnet about them.
He hovered around the console, his fingers debating whether to plug in the co-ordinates for twenty first century London. As he did so his mind drifted back to Donna Noble, the gobby bride to be he encountered a few weeks ago. He didn't want to admit it until now but she had been right, he did need someone alongside him. Sometimes he just didn't know when to stop.
Thinking back to his last adventure, a small grin crossed the Time Lord's face, all the talk of witches gave him an idea. It had been a long time since he dropped in on Britain's wizarding community, not since his seventh incarnation if he recalled correctly. Plus it would give him a good opportunity to show off in front of his new, potential companion, "So you're a Harry Potter fan?" he asked Martha casually.
"Not a super fan, I'm not planning on queuing up when book seven comes out", she replied, "but they're good to read when I'm on call during a night shift". She paused, catching the mischievous look in the Doctor's eyes, "You've read the final book?" he nodded, "could you tell me what happens? I can lord it over my sister Tish, she's a massive fan".
"I can do one better than that Miss Jones", he grinned, "fancy a bonus trip?" The trainee doctor nodded and the Time Lord pulled down on the flight controls again. He gripped tightly on to the console as the ship crashed through the time vortex on the way to their destination. He couldn't wait to see the look on Martha's face when they arrived and she opened the door.
The ship began to groan as it materialised at his chosen destination, landing with a firm bump, "Why don't you go first?" he said to his companion.
He watched as Martha stepped outside the door, deliberately hanging back for a few seconds. He placed his hands in his pockets and strolled outside, carefully closing the door behind him, "It's magnificent", Martha gasped, "it looks just like Hogwarts".
"That's because it is Hogwarts", the Doctor grinned, "Martha Jones, welcome to Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry".
There was a brief pause as Martha scanned him for any sign of deceit. When she couldn't find any, her jaw nearly hit the ground, "You're not joking?" the Doctor shook his head, "this is really Hogwarts?"
"Absolutely", the Time Lord began, "the best stories are the ones with a small grain of truth behind them. Old JK's books just so happened to have a more than a small grain of truth, more like an entire sack full of truth", he jabbered on.
"Slow down, I'm still processing the fact I'm standing in the shadow of Hogwarts", Martha gushed, "can you explain the whole thing, from the very beginning".
The Doctor nodded slowly, this was always his favourite part about taking a companion to a new location. "Little known fact about JK Rowling is that she's a Squib, or a non magical person born into a magical family". The pair began to slowly and leisurely stroll across the grass, "See Joanne was born into an old pureblood family, when they discovered she couldn't use magic she was put up for adoption".
"That's terrible", Martha gasped, "so all that stuff in the books about pureblood bigotry is true?"
The Time Lord sighed before answering, there had always been tension been the older families and the new bloods, as they were called in the nineteenth century. The blood wars of Grindlewald had sown hatred across magical Britain and from that mess rose the Dark Lord Voldemort. It pained the Doctor that hadn't arrived to assist against this Dark Lord but every time he tried to materialise during the 1970's or 1980's, the TARDIS rebuffed his attempts. After a while he stopped, if the old girl was so against arriving during that time period then it must be for a good reason.
Turning his attention back to his companion, he replied, "Unfortunately yes, just like in the muggle world there are those who discriminate simply because they believe someone is inferior".
"Know what that feels like", Martha mumbled, "so getting back to JK", she quickly changed the subject".
"Indeed", the Doctor grinned, more than happy to move onto a happy topic, "during the early 90's JK Rowling decided to track down her real family. Along the way he learned about Harry Potter, the famous Boy-Who-Lived. Deciding that it would make a good story, she did as much research as she could which eventually led to the famous series we know and love".
"So all of it really happened?" Martha asked, almost giddy with excitement.
"Well can't say for definite", the Doctor replied, "some of it must've been exaggerated for artistic licence I'm sure". Another grin flashed across his face, "Tell you what, since we're here let's find out".
The time travellers strode across the grassy field that surrounded the ancient castle and as they did, the Doctor had a good look at his surroundings. There were obvious signs of a recent battle which would make sense. If his TARDIS had dropped him in the correct location, this should be a couple of days after the Battle of Hogwarts. He could still feel the oppressive sensation of death in the air along with the energy residue belonging to thousands of magical curses. There was something else in the air, something he wasn't expecting, "Temporal energy", he mumbled.
"Did you say something Doctor?" Martha asked.
Still distracted, the Time Lord quickly dismissed her concerns, "Oh nothing", he began, "just talking out loud, don't mind me". He quickly focused on the energy again, allowing the sensation to wash over his body. It was strange, it felt very similar to the signature from a TARDIS. That was impossible though, his was the only TARDIS left in existence. He quickly decided that the magical energy must be magnifying the feeling of his TARDIS, that was the only logical explanation.
The Time Lord could see the entrance to the school getting closer and briefly wondered if the portrait of his old friend Albus would still remember him. He was jogged from his thoughts by Martha tugging firmly on his hand, "Oh my God Doctor, look who it is", she pointed at three figures in slowly walking in their direction. "I'd bet you anything that's Harry, Ron and Hermione".
"Most likely", the Doctor replied, "look a little different than I pictured them". That wasn't true, the dark haired teen and the red head looked exactly how the Time Lord imagined Harry Potter and Ron Weasley. The curiosity was the brunette, the face said Hermione Granger but the straightened brown hair and military jacket suggested otherwise. There was something else about the girl that felt familiar but he couldn't quite place it.
Taking a couple of paces ahead of Martha, the Doctor reached into his pocket for his psychic paper, "Hello there I'm the Doctor from the Ministry", he flashed the paper in their direction, "this is my assistant Martha Jones. Don't mind us we're just checking up on the repairs, we'll be out your way before you know it".
The Doctor watched as the two boys inspected the psychic paper closely. The girl though hung back, her eyes never once leaving the Doctor. It was a little disconcerting if he was honest, "Hey Harry, apparently this guy's from the Ministry", Ron stated.
A smug feeling of victory flowed through the Doctor, however, that was quickly extinguished, "Funny, that bit of paper looks blank to me", Harry added. The Time Lord quickly looked at the psychic paper, that was twice now in quick succession that it had let him down. He quickly began to think of an escape plan, there was no telling what a group of post war survivors would do to a potential threat. To his surprise though, Harry looked over to the girl, "You sure this is him?"
"Positive", she replied, "no one else I know would team a suit with a pair of sandshoes".
Martha sniggered behind him, much to the Time Lord's annoyance, "They're not sandshoes", he mumbled in response. "I'm sorry do we know each other?" he added, "you might've met me but I may not have met you yet".
"Doctor I can't believe you don't recognise me", the girl replied, visibly deflated, "I know you're much older than when we last met but I don't think you've gone completely senile". The Time Lord frowned, there was a sense of familiarity in her voice, "You've regenerated since the last time too", she added, "I like it, definitely an improvement on that cranky old warrior".
Now the Doctor was truly stunned, not only did this woman know about regeneration but she had met his Time War incarnation. He desperately racked his brain, he didn't interact much with Earth during that time so surely he would remember. Suddenly something came back to him but it wasn't from his warrior regeneration, "I remember", he began, "New York around seventy years ago. I left you on the pier side and yet here you are, not looking any older".
A deep frown crossed the brunettes face, "Doctor we've never been to New York together". She closed the gap but the Doctor remained cautious, "Now Paris I remember, the Eiffel Tower, the seven Mona Lisa's, not to mention Count Scarlioni the Jagaroth". Frozen to the spot he watched as the familiar stranger snorted with laughter, "I wonder what Duggan's up to now, probably in prison or hospital I-".
"Who are you?" the Doctor asked dangerously, this woman knew too much about his past to be a mere acquaintance, "I want to know exactly who you are".
To his surprise the woman didn't flinch at his harsh tone, in fact she almost looked annoyed, "You senile old man it's me, Romana", she snapped back, "have you been dropped on your head recently?"
The Time Lord's hearts nearly stopped at the mention of Romana's name. How dare this imposter use the name of his former companion against him. Feeling the anger of the Oncoming Storm brewing in his vains, he stared harshly at the brunette, "Big mistake, stealing Romana's identity". The woman gaped for a moment before frowning, "Whatever your plan is you can forget it because I'm the Doctor, I'm nine hundred and three years old. I'm a Time Lord from the planet Galli-".
Suddenly he felt a sharp flash of pain and he instantly recoiled from the stinging blow to his face. As he was rubbing his cheek the Doctor could see a look of alarm from Martha, however, the two teenage boys were laughing at his expense, "That's going to leave a mark", Harry snorted with laughter.
"You arrogant, pompous, stupid, self centred moron", the woman suddenly turned on him, "save your little speech for someone else Doctor". She groaned in annoyance loudly, "If you still had that stupid scarf of yours I would be bloody strangling you with it right now". The painful slapped had shaken some of the Doctor's memories and right now, he was getting a flash back to the last few weeks of the Time War, "Remembering now are we?" she continued with biting sarcasm, "last time we met I slapped you as well".
It felt like a cloud had been lifted from the Doctor's vision. He could see the tired and battle weary eyes that belonged to someone much older than the woman in front of him. The glare he was receiving from exactly the same as his former companion and President used to give him all the time. That confirmed it, this woman had to be Romanadvoratrelundar. He had often dreamed to meeting another Time Lord after all this time, going as far to prepare an eloquent speech. Unfortunately under the angry glare of Romana, all that went out the window, "What?" he muttered.
A/N – Yeah, probably not the reunion everyone had in mind. I debated which Doctor to bring in, settling on Ten for two reasons. Firstly the references to JK Rowling in "The Shakespeare Code" gave a perfect way for him to casually drop in. Also I love Ten, he's my favourite.
The "JK Rowling is a Squib" idea probably isn't uniquely mine. It's been thrown around in various different places over the years. Also hinted at a future adventure of this Romana and the Doctor cause I'm a tease. Bonus points if you know what classic DW serial Romana reference as well.
Next time we'll see that scene from Romana's perspective (which will fill in the majority of blanks you might have) along with some Time Lord bonding.