Chapter 28: Sloth

For the first time since Subaru woke up in Teyvat, he'd been faced with this question.

'When am I?'

He was back in his tent, and oddly enough, that was the first question on his mind. Every day had been so productive for the last few days. Having to redo even a single one felt like so much work weighing down own him.

It still seemed so simple. Especially when he had so much more to worry about.

"Petelgeuse Romanee-Conti…"

The moment that name emerged unbidden from his mouth, the memories came crashing forth. An extremely powerful opponent he'd faced and died to several times in his previous world, only for him to realize that the spirit of that monster could possess him as well. Natsuki Subaru, however, remained unfazed by such a thing. He defeated Petelgeuse with a swift punch to a burning face.

"Just what had I become back there?" he spoke to himself.

Someone yawned from his side. Paimon grumbled as she rubbed her eyes awake. "Subaru? What time is it?"

Subaru remained silent, still looking at the little fairy. He recalled how Petelgeuse sent Paimon to her death.

'But why did he kill me? Wasn't he free?' A shiver ran through his spine. 'Could it be…?'

"Oi! Are you Stinky Spacing again?!"

"It's a verb now?!"

It didn't take long for the two to get ready for the day. Paimon didn't have to do much other than brush her teeth, while Subaru just sped through the routine. Anything to keep himself from thinking too deep about his situation.

As they left their tent, Paimon immediately growled about how the sky was still mostly dark. There was light peeking out from the horizon, but the moment could only be called sunrise rather than morning.

"Who's gonna make Paimon breakfast now?! Harris is probably still asleep…"

Subaru sighed. "I can make you breakfast, is that alright?"

"Ooh! It's been a while since I had Stinky Space's cooking!"

"Ah, you two are awake already?"

That voice froze Subaru, even though Paimon eagerly turned around. "Oh, hey Albedo! Good morning!"

He was back to that same morning. Albedo had just spoken to them last night. Not only did Subaru know what time he woke up in, he was also faced with danger as soon as he awoke.

This Albedo was the imposter.

Subaru turned back and plastered a smile onto his face. "Morning, Albedo! Why're you up so early?"

"Why I'm…? I wanted to return to the mountains. There were some matters I needed to take care of."

"Want to join us for breakfast first?" Paimon brought up. "You must be starving, right?"

The imposter blinked in surprise. "How often do you normally eat? Did you not eat well last night?"

Subaru bristled at the comment, finally understanding them to be from the imposter's lack of humanity. However, Paimon didn't get the same message. "Hey! Paimon eats just fine for a Paimon!"

As Paimon's ridiculousness countered the imposter's lack of humanity, Subaru took a moment to appraise the latter. Unfortunately, Albedo was a rather mechanical person, so identifying between him and the imposter via behavior would be difficult. He knew that he'd meet the real Albedo again at some point, so finding some physical difference between the two was vital. He immediately captured the tone of his hair, the shape of his face, the bend of his neck, the way his clothes came together, all of it. Thankfully, he wasn't interrupted while doing so.

"Unfortunately," the imposter soon decided to just drop the entire topic. "I cannot join you for your meal this morning. I have something I need to accomplish."

"Aww," Paimon bemoaned. "Well, if you are busy, then Paimon won't stop you. Stinky Space, let's – "

"I will also need 'Stinky Space' here to come with me."

As Paimon grumbled about how Albedo was taking her meal ticket away, Subaru realized something. The imposter had never learned his real name. For once, he thanked Paimon's incessant butchery of his name.

"Aw, man," Subaru faux-grumbled as well. "Why are you calling me that too? Just call me by my name, would you?"

"Very well. In that case, I will call you by your name from now."

"You don't need a reminder of it, don't you?"

The imposter paused. "If you can give me a reminder, it would be much appreciated."

Before Paimon could speak, however, Subaru pat her on the head. A while before, Subaru had discussed with a Paimon a way to have her stop digging deeper into things because he was investigating something. That sign was a pat on the head from out of nowhere. Of course, Subaru maintained all rights to pat Paimon on the head all he wanted, but such a situation was not one where he'd normally do so. Paimon, immediately noticing Subaru's hand on her head, quieted down.

"Kenichi. Just Kenichi."

Giving the imposter his father's name felt uncomfortable, but he knew that his family was far away from whatever matters went on in Teyvat. Insured of their safety, Subaru was willing to give away something normally so risky.

"Kenichi. Thank you." As expected, Albedo accepted the false name without complaint, earning an unnoticed look of alarm from Paimon.

"And sure, I'll come with you. You mind if I speak with Paimon for a while, though?"

"Of course. I will be waiting by the exit to the mountains."

Nodding, Subaru watched as Albedo walked away. He kept his hand on Paimon's head for a while, still watching Albedo from behind. Once he was positive the imposter wouldn't hear him, Subaru turned to Paimon and released his hand.

"Subaru! That – "

"Quiet, please," Subaru immediately shushed her, casting a wary look back to the imposter. Thankfully, he was still walking away. "Don't want him to hear my real name."

"But… But Albedo knows your name already, right?" Paimon shivered. "Then… then who did Paimon just speak to?"

"That's what I'm trying to find out. You should stay here, Paimon. Let the others know that I will be finding out more about this imposter in Albedo's skin. Ask them to help when they can."

"But… but can't we ask them for help now?"

"They're all asleep and they'll take time to get ready. Not only that, but the imposter will also become wary if other people are there, especially Vision bearers. When you ask the others, tell them to stay a distance away."

"… Subaru?" Paimon muttered, coming close and tugging on his shirtsleeve. "Do you need to go?"

Subaru looked down at Paimon and –

The cave collapsed on her as he unwillingly spoke his other name –

"Yeah," Subaru choked out, immediately pushing Paimon away from him. "You should stay here. You'll be safe."

"But… But what about you?"

"I… will be fine." Subaru clenched his fists. "I will do what I can to keep you safe."

Paimon seemed to sink within the air as Subaru said that, but she curtly nodded and looked away. As Paimon drifted away from him, Subaru steeled his heart and turned around, ready to face whatever perils the imposter had ready for him.

Thankfully, they hadn't encountered Joel on the way. Subaru wondered why they missed him, but in his situation, he didn't want to look a gift horse in the mouth.

The imposter wasn't much for conversation, and he was growing to detest that. Thoughts kept plaguing him and he could not find any escape. Any attempt at conversation with the imposter led to immediate shutdowns. Subaru had never missed Paimon's presence before, but at that moment he would give an arm and a leg for her to be there to break the silence.

Subaru followed the imposter down an untrodden path, them moving someplace Subaru had never seen before. Heading further south, Subaru cast a worried look back to the mountain behind them.

"Where are you taking me, again?"

"I would like to test the effectiveness of your spear against different enemies. I wish to see it firsthand."

His weapon. Subaru cursed under his breath; that foul weapon he'd trusted so much was rearing its head again.

"Anything wrong?"

"Nothing, just… do I have to keep using the spear? I'd like to practice my own skills as well."

"You may do so in your own time, Kenichi. This experiment is exclusively for the Festering Desire."

With the imposter looking away, Subaru was able to snarl. Albedo hadn't known the name of the spear. Moreover, the imposter seemed dead set on him using the spear alone. He was just glad that it would only be the imposter that would deal with the ramifications of that choice.

"Are you sure it's limited to the spear? Are you sure it's not your own Sloth that awakened him?"

'Shut up, already.'

In the distance, Subaru noticed the glimmer of activity. A couple of strange men in thick clothes were eating what seemed to be crackers and jerky. Subaru immediately noticed how they didn't light a fire to warm themselves as well as the bandannas over their mouths to cover their identities. With their head covers, however, the setup looked more like they were wearing balaclavas.

"Those are thieves," the imposter said to him. "As part of the Treasure Hunter organization, they seek nothing but to fill their own pockets with riches they can loot off any desolate land. I am certain they have looted many dead around here for anything of value they have."

Despite it coming from an untrustworthy source, Subaru had to say that they seemed suspicious. He'd never seen them before, which probably meant they were staying away from anyone that would easily take them in. There would be no reason for regular people to be in Dragonspine after the weather disaster without them having some ulterior motive.

"Why are we here?" Subaru asked.

"You will have to kill them. Use the spear."

"W-What?! Why?!"

"These humans serve no purpose other than destruction of everything around them. I believed that you would be okay with killing them, at the very least."

"Just… no, never mind." There was no point in discussing such a thing; the imposter didn't know a thing about humans, which was why it was so willingly asking Subaru to do so.

"So… what, you just want me to go in there… and kill them?"

"Precisely."

Subaru cursed under his breath. While the idea of killing people terrified him, especially after having done so accidentally last time, there was one saving grace he could count on.

'The Festering Desire has no effect on normal people outside of being a spear.'

Subaru knew what to do. He would approach the group, fight them, and injure them with the spear. When they were sufficiently downed, he would 'accidentally' give them time to run away and save themselves. That way, they would still be alive and the imposter would remain happy, somewhat.

Subaru let out a huff. "Alright."

He stood up from behind their cover and casually walked towards the treasure hoarders. He did his best to set a grim expression on his face. Thankfully, the expression worked, as once the men noticed him, they all unconsciously backed away.

With a flourish, Subaru summoned his spear.

"W-who are you?!" A large man, probably the leader of the group, stepped up and asked despite his men cowering away. "What do you want?!"

"Run away while you still have the chance. If you stay here, you will die."

The delivery worked well enough. Some of the thieves fell to their backs and began to scramble away. However, the leader only grit his teeth and summoned a hammer. The leader immediately charged at him.

Hissing, Subaru watched the trajectory of the hammer. After fighting monsters like Eula and Rosaria, Subaru could say he had enough know-how on how to dodge an attack like that. With a step to the left, Subaru moved out of the way of the attack, making the leader stumble away from him.

With a repressed grin, Subaru lightly slashed the thief's back, feeling an odd sense of glee as red spilled into his sliced shirt.

"Leader!" The others cried out, looking at him in alarm. The leader, however, grunted as he turned back to face Subaru. Subaru smiled; the spear wasn't working.

The light faded from the leader's eyes; he unceremoniously fell to the ground. The body shrunk in on itself, turning gaunt and old as the Festering Desire claimed the human's life for its own.

Subaru watched in horror as the leader's body didn't move any further. There was no way a small cut like that would normally kill someone. He hazarded a look down at his spear and noticed the purple gem at the head gleaming happily.

"B-Boss!" The members cried out in alarm, making some of them run away in fear. However, some stood their ground and hoisted their weapons against Subaru, eager to avenge their leader. Subaru turned back, finally coming to terms with what he had done, and what he has to keep doing.

'It shouldn't have worked.'

Gnashing his teeth, Subaru thrust his spear through another treasure hoarder coming after him with a sword.

'The Fatui survived this spear, how are these guys dying?"

He groaned as he slashed through another two after dashing to them.

"Then why are you still doing this?"

As a bottle of something came at him, a black hand shot out of him and swatted it out of the air.

"Haah… how slothful of you, Natsuki Subaru."

He threw the spear against another thief, and in one motion, sent out an Unseen Hand to grab it and spin it around him, killing everyone left in one fell swoop.

The hand returned the Festering Deaire to Subaru's waiting hand, leaving him to gasp at the feeling of horror, disgust, and glee that clashed within him. He looked down at the red snow beneath him and felt an odd smile access his face. The purple light shone against the snow, adding serenity to the bloodstained fields. The Festering Desire was happy, and so was he.

"Good work, Kenichi," the imposter said, walking towards him.

"Don't say that name."

"Hm."

"Keep my dad's name out of your fucking mouth, you imposter."

Its eyes narrowed. "So you knew. I imagine you've told the others in your camp as well?"

Subaru immediately fired out an Unseen Hand holding the spear at the imposter. Looking in shock, the imposter slid away from him, seeming to glide over the snow.

"How dare you?!" Subaru cried out. "How dare you how dare you how dare you how dare you-"

A volley of arms erupted out of his body as Subaru threw himself at the imposter, hoping to crush it under his arms. The imposter immediately planted his arms in the snow and seemed to sink underneath.

"Don't you run! I can Return by –"

The onset of the Witch of Envy didn't faze him at all. In fact, a small part of him felt reverential to the Witch for granting him such a gift.

The imposter paused mid-escape in due to the miasma, which Subaru took advantage of by ripping it out by its roots. Ignoring the way those roots seemed to shrink to become Albedo's hands, Subaru immediately thrust the Festering Desire against the imposter.

The imposter, however, shot out a shard of ice from its mouth against the incoming spear, staggering Subaru. The imposter forced itself out of his grip and landed on the ground. It looked at Subaru, and odd anger filling it from his presence.

After all, that person was a threat to its future.

Ignoring all sense of self-preservation, the imposter ran at Subaru. While Subaru pulled his hands back into himself because of the shock of how it freed itself, the imposter immediately formed balls of ice on either hand and threw them at Subaru.

Subaru winced as he saw the incoming balls and, out of instinct, slashed through them with the Festering Desire. The nasty gleam of its gem showed how fueled it was from the murder it was just used for. Crying out, Subaru thrust the spear into the ground, letting out a shockwave of purple running through the ice to reach the imposter.

The imposter yelled as it was thrown away, not having expected such an attack. Before it could regain its bearings, however, Subaru immediately pulled the imposter back with an Unseen Hand. Still staggered by the last attack, the imposter could do nothing as Subaru drove his spear through it.

No words were spoken. The imposter's body and face merely withered under the might of the spear, crumbling into dust rather than aging as the thieves had. Finally pulling his spear free, Subaru retracted Unseen Hand and heaved onto the ground. He fell to his knees; breaths weren't saving him anymore.

The Festering Desire clattered onto the ground as Subaru balled his fists and slammed them against the snow. "Unfair!" he cried out, still slamming his fists against the snow. "Unfair, unfair, unfair! Why am I… why am I going through such a thing…?"

Despite it all, tears never came. Instead, his eyes bulged out into a crazed stare against the snow. "My brain trembles…"

Subaru immediately shot up and slapped himself in the face. "No! You're not taking over!"

"Oh? A pathetic fool like you is trying to fight me?"

"Please! Just stop, already! Let me live my life!"

"HAHAHA! You want everything, but you want to do nothing for it? How slothful, Natsuki Subaru…"

"… isn't that what you are, Petelgeuse?"

Subaru's face grinned. "Ahh… to be so loved by the Witch… you don't deserve such love, with how Slothful you are with it. You use her love for you… but you don't feel anything back for her?"

"…"

"Just how many times have you died, Natsuki Subaru? How many times have you abused her love for you?"

"Shut up."

"Unfaithful Unfaithful Unfaithful! You cheater! You don't deserve this love the Witch gives you! You should be dead, already!"

"Just… stop. Please. I'll do anything."

"Anything? Then keel over and die. Again and again and again and again and again… and embrace this love that the Witch gives you. Let me feel that love through you, Natsuki Subaru."

The Festering Desire still remained nearby, gleaming in excitement to be used again. Subaru walked to the spear and picked it up, then raised the head of the spear to his face.

"It will change nothing, Natsuki Subaru. In the end, you will wake up in the same way as always. The Witch watches over you."

Subaru's ears twitched as sounds picked up over the wind. Looking past the throes of bodies, Subaru watched a group of monsters coming to him from all sides. He remembered how he invoked the Witch's miasma; it made sense for them to be there.

"The others… Paimon, Amber…"

"They don't matter. Pathetic fools who cannot see the wonders that the Witch provides you and still make use of you. Just what have they done to help you, Natsuki Subaru?"

"Everything. They gave me everything I have."

"No, the Witch gave you everything. On the other hand, they are only alive because they took advantage of the love the Witch has for you. Those fools are already dead to you."

Subaru grit his teeth. He knew that Petelgeuse was wrong about that, but he couldn't find it in himself to argue anymore.

To his shock, Unseen Hand emerged out of him and crushed the army of hilichurls approaching him. The Festering Desire went forth and slashed all the bigger monsters – a couple mitachurls and even a few Lawachurls – and left behind only more bodies in his wake.

"Then we will see them," Petelgeuse concluded. "I will show you just what they think of you, Natsuki Subaru."

"... then I'll show you that you're wrong, Petelgeuse."

A/N: Look, I know this is a short chapter and it came out late, but I had way too many assignments on my plate. Graduate studies is definitely a step above being a freshman or sophomore. I've not even fully formatted this chapter; I decided I had to finish this tonight and upload it because I didn't want to keep you all waiting. So, I will probably edit this chapter later, maybe add more content within it, and upload the next chapter for the next upload period.

I know that this is just a whole lotta grief, but that's the whole theme of this arc. I designed Subaru's choices here on the 5 stages of grief. He was in denial at first, wanting to forget that he was possessed by Petelgeuse, but was still making decisions based on it like leaving Paimon behind. The murder spree was anger: the wrath he felt when the Festering Desire actually killed a treasure hoarder combined with the spear's natural influence over his mind to keep killing and Petelgeuse laughing at Subaru's actions. Subaru talking with Petelgeuse was the bargaining stage, which was quickly followed by depression when Subaru succumbed to what Petelgeuse. Acceptance is technically when Subaru decided to work 'with' Petelgeuse for the time, but even then that is finicky.

If you have any complaints about this chapter outside of the length, please let me know. I will treasure any advice you can give me on this.

I'm also struggling a bit with this sequence of events. It's hard for me to picture what's gonna happen in the next death arc, and that's stalling my progress. Even the contents of the current death arc feel... artificial. I need to get my head in the game and actually develop the story first. It does hurt to think about this when my DxD fic is flowing like a steady stream, though. But it's not like i didn't anticipate this, it's just that pairing this with a ton of assignments on my shoulders was weighing me down too much to actually write. Hopefully I'll have recovered a bit from this in December.

Ferrum Sanguis Pulvis Ignis: For now, I'm keeping Unseen Hand to Petelgeuse's level because of what's happening in the story. I do have plans for for the Sloth Witch Factor once this arc is done, however. As for Subaru's other skills... Subaru's already learned to read the Teyvatian script. There was a whole bit with Lisa teaching him for a while, and that interaction with Noelle where they read books together. Subaru cooks in the field because of the few memories he has of Rem teaching him when he was a butler, I've gone pretty detailed with the recipes too. Speaking with hilichurls is a different matter entirely. It depends on whether he'd meet Ella Musk, which I have no plans on for now.

Superbib: Yeah I agree with the comment about PXX. Unfortunately, the Persona aspect of it feels key in my mind and a true original version would only be a Persona knockoff in the end.

Thanks for the comment about Petelgeuse! I'm planning on their interactions being much more serious than a mere Paimon 2.0, as shown by this chapter. Although Subaru is definitely losing his mind, sorry about that. For obvious reasons, I won't go into their future interactions as much.

I don't really have a comfort fic. Nothing I return to or anything. Sometimes I think of ideas and just jot them down in single chapters, which I can't continue because of lack of knowledge of the source. For example, I've written an intro for an Eminence in Shadow fanfic that I won't be uploading, and I've been thinking of writing short snippets for a JJK and Quintessential Quintuplets crossover. That second one is just a return to my roots in destroying the peace in slice of life anime.

MauvikaFire: To be fair, Subaru's faced way worse in Lugunica. Honestly, this is nothing compared to what he went through in Arc 6 of the WN, which I won't spoil for you if you haven't read it.

Genshin definitely has dark undertones, I've seen far too much of those when I played back in the day. Ruu's quest was definitely one, but Genshin definitely leans more towards the fantasy trope. From an outsider looking in, they only see the wonderful fantasy world with its colorful characters. This story brings that darkness into even those seemingly fantastical moments.

That was pretty much my inspiration for this story when I started writing. Outside of wanting to experiment with a character like Natsuki Subaru, whose character I thought I couldn't replicate, I did want to see Subaru's dark view on the world taken in even the positive moments of Genshin Impact. I was definitely surprised when this story boomed further than any of my existing ones.

Alright, I'm beat. See you next chapter.