Don't chapter 3

Hinata knocked on his mother's door. A nurse opened it, Sasaki Miyuki, she was nursing his mother since she got admitted to the hospital.

"Ah, Shouyou-kun, Natsu-chan, you came to visit, didn't I tell you guys to come at visiting hours"? She said with a sweet smile.

"I am sorry Sasaki-san, but I had school and training, so I couldn't come another time."

"Well I guess it is okay, if you just don't do it too much. Come in, don't be too noisy, your mom needs all the rest she can get." Sasaki stepped aside so the two kids could walk into the room. She walked out and closed the door, giving them a bit of privacy.

His mother room wasn't big. The walls were white and on the right sight there was a big window, where his mother could look out at a park. There was TV standing in the corner. All-in all, they were lucky with the room. Hinata hated it.

Every time he was here, he had to watch his mother get more sick. Every time he walked out he had to say goodbye to her.

"Mommy!" Natsu jumped on her bed. Hinata sat down next to them. His mother looked worse. Her eyes were tired and the weight of Natsu was clearly a lot for her. The only thing that always stayed the same was her smile. Gentle, sweet and full of love.

"Shoyo, Natsu, you two are so sweet to come to visit. Why isn't dad here with you"?

"H-he is busy with his work, but I had to tell you that he misses you". Hinata lied. He didn't want his mother to know how his father had changed. She already had enough to worry about.

Besides that, his father was ready to change. He had promised that yesterday evening. So there was nothing to tell.

"Well that is a shame, tell him that I miss him too. The same goes for you two. I miss you so much. How is school going"?

"I made a new friend on school today," Natsy said happy.

"Ooh, that is good, tell me all about him or her sweetie", said their mom with a smile. While Natsu told her about her new friend, Hinata noticed something weird at the window in the door.

No, he probably hadn't seen it right. Wait there was it again. Brown hair, with a few strings of blond hair. Oh please don't tell me...

"I am sorry, I have to look in the hallway for a second." He walked towards the door and opened it. And there he looked right in the eyes of Nishinoya, Kageyama and Tanaka.

"G-guys, what are you doing here?" he stammered.

"Shoyo, well um. Good to see you again! Eh, what are we doing here? Well. Tanaka explain." Nishinoya elbowed Tanaka in the side who turned as red as a tomato. Before he could say something, Hinata's mom called them.

"Shoyo?" Are they your friends? Please let them in, it would be lovely to meet them." Hinata sighed. This was the last thing he had wanted to happen. If they saw how sick his mom looked like, there was no way these three were gonna shut their mouths about it. Soon everyone on the team would know about it.

"Yes mom, guys come in and meet my mother", he said with a fake smile. The guys looked relieved and walked in the room. Hinata sat down on his chair again, while the three boys stood in front of his mother's bed — all looking a bit uncomfortable — and bowed.

"Nice to meet you Hinata's mom, I am Nishinoya, the baldy next to me is Tanaka and that annoyed looking guy is Kageyama". Her mom giggled, while softly rubbing over Natsu's hair.

"So you are my kids friend, I hope he isn't too much of an annoyance to you guys"? Hinata slowly turned red.

"He is a stupid Idiot", Kageyama said, who then got punched in the side by Tanaka.

"Don't worry about it Hinata-san, he can be stupid, but because we are good senpai's we look after him", Tanaka said while making a little wink.

"That is good to know", she said and after that she yawned. Hinata noticed how tired she looked. These visits were nice, but it was clear that it costs his mother a lot of energy.

"I guess we should go, you need to rest a lot", Hinata said while grabbing Natsu off the bed. His sister was already half asleep, so it was easy.

"It was good to see you two again, and it was also nice to meet you guys"!

"I am sorry if we were to noisy and we hope you get better soon", said Tanaka and the three boys walked out of the room, knowing that the family needed a little time alone to say goodbye.

After a few minutes, Hinata walked out the door. A half sleeping Natsu on his back. He looked at his three teammates and smiled a bit uncomfortable.

"Shall we go back home." Hinata said.

While walking through the hospital the four of them didn't really know what to say to each other. This was a common thing for Kageyama, he had never been the talkative kind of person — except when Hinata did something stupid and he had to yell at him.

However, Hinata, Nishinoya and Tanaka always babbled about something. There was never silence in the room when one of them was there, let alone when all three of them were together. It was one of the first times that they really were not sure what to say.

So in the end they just talked about volleyball. Tanaka had thrown in the subject, hoping it would work against the awkwardness that was now between them. Of course, the rest jumped at the opportunity and just babbled along. It wasn't with the same enthusiasm as normal though.

Hinata had kept his mother's sickness a secret since the start of high school. It had been months and now not only did the team know about it, three of them had seen how sick she really was. Hinata wasn't angry at them for following him — although he had to admit it felt a bit creepy – but in the end they had done it with only good intentions in their mind.

After exiting the hospital they said their goodbyes to Nishinoya and Tanaka, since both of them had to go the other direction.

Silence returned now it was only Hinata, a sleeping Natsu and Kageyama. Hinata suppressed a shiver. It was starting to get dark and it was gonna be a cold night.

Kageyama looked at his little teammate and wasn't sure what to say. He wasn't good at these kinds of conversations. Not saying anything felt wrong, however saying something seemed even harder. What was he supposed to say? So he took a few minutes to think things through.

Kageyama couldn't let go of the image of Hinata's sick mother. He didn't know much about human biology or health things, but Kageyama was pretty sure that this wasn't just some kind of flu. She was seriously ill. So he just decided to start with that.

"Your mom is really sick, isn't she?" He knew it wasn't the most subtle way to address the subject, but he really didn't know how to do it otherwise.

Hinata fell silent for a few seconds and then stopped. His eyes met Kageyama's. The setter had seen a lot of emotion in these eyes the past few months — frustration when he had made a mistake at volleyball, joy and happiness, ambition just before a match against a strong opponent and defeat just after the fight against Aoba Josai.

The emotion in Hinata's eyes right now was a new one. It was grief.

"Yeah, she really is sick."

"Oh." Was all that Kageyama said. Why again did he decide that it was important to talk about Hinata's sick mother with him? He and Hinata never had deep conversations about emotions or something like that. Mostly because Kageyama wasn't good at it. He just didn't know how to do it. He wished that Suga-senpai was here with him, he always knew what to say.

But even though Kageyama knew he was socially inept, he was also very stubborn. Once he started something, he wouldn't stop just because he didn't really know how to do it.

Luckily for Kageyama, Hinata was a lot better at these kinds of conversations. Before the setter had time to think about what to say next, Hinata started talking.

"She has cancer. Five years ago they found out about it. After some chemo therapy it dissapeared, but then almost two years ago it returned. Three weeks ago she got so weak that she had to be admitted at the hospital."

Had it been going on for that long? How come no one on their team knew that Hinata's mom had cancer? Kageyama knew he was more or less a loner kind of guy, but he considered Hinata a friend. These were the kind of things friends told each other, right?

Not that he blamed Hinata for not telling him about it sooner, Kageyama had never really shown any interest in anything about Hinata except for his volleyball skills.

"Is she going to be alright?" He asked. It took Hinata a few seconds to answer that question.

"To be honest, I don't know. A week ago I would have said that she was going to be fine, but I can see that she is getting more and more sick. I try to be positive, but I don't really know."

"Are you going to be alright?" Kageyama carefully asked.

"I don't know." Was Hinata's answer. It felt so wrong. Hinata always had energy, he was always happy. Now, he just looked so defeated. Kageyama really didn't know what to say.

He just wasn't cut out for these kinds of things. He wanted to help Hinata, not only because he liked to toss to the dumbass. He cared about him – not that Kageyama would say that out loud and definitaly not towards the idiot himself. Kageyama would never call Hinata his best friend , but that didn't mean it wasn't that way. He was pretty sure that Hinata himself thought about it the same way.

So what was he supposed to say now? How could he support his friend? This was harder than all the English tests at school combined.

Out of the blue Hinata started to giggle.

"Kageyama, you should see your own face. You look like you need to poop." He giggled.

Ah, yeah, Kageyama almost forgot, Hinata was a big idiot.

"What do you mean with that? Dumbass, I was just trying to think!" He said frustrated.

"Then you should definitaly never use your brain again, because the way you looked, someone might think you are having a stroke."

"What the… I was trying to be nice you…you…dumbass."

"Well, don't, it doesn't suit you." Hinata giggled. Then he suddenly looked a lot more serious. "I mean it, please don't start treating me any differently now you know about my mom okay? Just keep being that annoying grumpy Kageyama that I know, okay?"

"I am not grumpy."

"Yes you are."

"No I am not."

"Yes…"

"Shut up dumbass."And with that, everything was back to normal between the two idiot first years of Karasuno.

-Haikyuu-

Hinata wasn't sure what he expected opening the clubroom. He and Kageyama had a good talk yesterday, it was a bit awkward and weird though — but Hinata was sure that was manly Kageyama's fault.

Hinata had tried to keep his mom's sickness a secret for so long, he had always expected that he wouldn't like it if other people knew. The weird thing was though, talking with Kageyama about his mom felt kind of nice. Hinata used to be scared that the setter would think differently of him, but in the end nothing seemed to have changed. He hoped it was the same for the rest of the team.

"Good morning." He said. Daichi, Suga and Asahi were already changed. Tanaka and Nishinoya were standing in the corner — both shirtless. Kageyama just walked in behind him. Tsukki and Yamaguchi were both standing in the other corner.

The moment he walked in, Nishinoya and Tanaka looked at each other and then took a devoted step towards Hinata. Then — out of the blue — they both took a deep bow. Kageyama, who just wanted to walk towards the bathroom, got grabbed by Tanaka, who then pushed his head down so the setter was standing in the same position as the other two. This got — of course — everyone else attention.

Hinata could feel his head becoming as red as a tomato and put both of his hands in the air, as a sign that they needed to stop. Why were they bowing to him? After a few seconds, Tanaka let go of Kageyama, who immediately shot back to standing straight again, his face full of frustration.

"Hinata, we wanted to apologize for yesterday. We realized it wasn't our place to do what we had done." Tanaka said when he stood back straight. Nishinoya nodded.

"We are sorry Shoyo. We just wanted to be good senpais! But when we were walking home we realized what kind of idiots we have been!" Nishinoya yelled. Tanaka hit Kageyama's side with his elbow and gave him an expectant look. Kageyama was clearly contemplating what to do. Hinata had to do everything not to laugh out loud. He had the same face as last night when he tried to be nice to him. Hinata guessed it was just really not his kind of thing.

"Sorry." Kageyama mumbled quickly and then looked away.

"There is nothing to be sorry about guys!" Hinata smiled. "You did it with all good intentions, right?"

"Yeah of course! But still following you towards the hospital was just plain stupid!" Tanaka said. The third years all looked up at this.

"You did what?" Daichi said, with his usual stern voice.

Suga followed with a sign. "You guys are unbelievable."

Hinata laughed it off. "No, it really is alright." He said, while scratching the back of his head.

"Well your mom seems like a very nice person. I hope she gets better soon!" Nishinoya said.

"Yeah thanks, she is the best mom I could have! The doctors already said that she is getting better!" Hinata lied.
He knew Kageyama was looking at him, but Hinata dodged his eyes on purpose. Kageyama knew the truth. That was fine, Hinata had decided that it was actually nice that someone knew about it, but he wasn't ready for the whole team to know how terribly sick his mother was. Hinata himself had barely accepted the fact that his mom might not get home soon. If everyone on the team knew, he wouldn't be able to forget about it. It would become reality.

Luckily Kageyama didn't say anything and soon the conversation drifted away from Hinata's mom — something Hinata was glad to accept.

After five more minutes all the boys had changed and were ready to play some volleyball. In the gym they started with a normal warming up. Hinata was happy to notice that everything was still normal, nobody treated him differently, even Kageyama was still his annoyingly grumpy self, although Hinata caught the setter a few times staring at him with a weird look on his face, but he just ignored it.

Hinata just wanted to throw the ball towards Kageyama, so he could set it up for him, when Takeda ran in and fell on his knees.

Everyone gathered around their teacher. A few suprised mumbles were heard at his sudden income.

"Sensei?"

"Take-chan!"

"Are you okay?!"

Takeda looked up. Excitement clearly seen in his face. His nose was bleeding a bit though, but the teacher didn't seem to mind.

"We are going right? To Tokyo!?"

"Tokyo?" Hinata mumbled to himself. He could feel a fire waking up in himself. Tokyo could only mean one thing. "You mean Nekoma!" He said excited.

"A practice match?" Kageyama asked. The same excitement as the rest of the team clearly seen in his facial expression.

Takeda nodded happily. "Yeah, but it won't be just Nekoma this time! The Fukurodani academy group. It's a group from schools from the kanto region that includes Nekoma. Apparently, they hold practice matches all the time. This time, because of coach Nekoma, Kurasuno will also be able to participate in the matches."
Hinata was — just like the rest of the team — beyond trilled. He was pretty sure that his eyes sparkled with exitment, and he couldn't help but smile.

Coach Ukai himself had a pretty big smirk on his face too.

"Groups like that are hard to get into, we have got to make sure to thank coach Nekomata. And sensei too, who I am sure kept persistently asking him."

No one on the team hesitated to bow for Takeda while thanking him. The teacher immediately started to blush and stutter.

"Don't worry about it! There is one thing though. For the time being they are planned next month. Because they are away games, we need permission from your parents or guardians. So I'll hand out those forms later."

Hinata tried not to gulp at hearing the last part. He didn't want to bother his mother with this, so he would have to ask his dad.

"Well, that is great news Takeda-sensei!" Ukai said. "I am sure you guys all feel sour about our last defeat from Aoba Josai. That's okay, but use that feeling as a motivation to get better. Think about what you have, but also what you want to improve. Such a training camp is the perfect place for improvement. Just like Nekoma, I'm sure the other teams are gonna be on national level. Let's use the next weeks to get ready for them!"

Hinata's eyes glimmered full of excitement, his worries about his dad already forgotten. There were gonna be strong teams in Tokyo. Kurasuno was gonna practice with these teams. Those players were on national level! This was sooo cool!

He would see Kenma again and Kuroo and Inuoka and the rest of Nekoma, together with all the other strong players Hinata would meet.

Man, volleyball was so cool!

"Hey, dumbass." Kageyama said, while pinching him in his side.

"Kyaaaa! What the hell are you doing, you Bakeyama!" Hinata jumped away from his friend who just deliberately hurt him.

"You were not paying attention, idiot! Captain just said that we were gonna go back to practice!"

"What? He did? I am sorry, I was distracted by the thought of going to Tokyo!" He grinned. "Kageyama, we are gonna become so much better playing against all those people!"

At this Kageyama couldn't help but smile to — although it was more like an evil creepy grin.

"Yeah, dumbass, we are!"

-Haikyuu-

After volleyball practice Hinata had picked up Natsu from her friends and visited his mother again. This time, no one from him team followed him.

It was nice. Natsu first talked about school. Then Hinata told his mom about the trip to Tokyo. His mother could only smile at her sons enthusiasm about volleyball.

Now they were home, the visit to his mom had taken longer than expected. Natsu, again, was so tired, Hinata had to carry her home.

"I am home!" Hinata said, while walking inwards. "Hey Natsu, I know your tired, but I need you to wake up for a bit."

"Don't wanna." She said drowsy. Hinata could only smile at this.

"It's just for five minutes, so you can change in your pajamas and I can tuck you." Hinata slowly put his sister down and helped her put off her shoes. It was clear that Natsu had to do everything not to fall asleep again, she was nid-nodding.

"I am gonna tell dad that we are home, if you go upstairs and change quickly, I might have time to tell you an awesome bed time story." He said and her eyes shot open. Bed times stories always worked. Natsu loved it when Hinata would tell something. She nodded, her orange curls jumping up and down, and walked towards the stairs.

Meanwhile, Hinata walked towards the kitchen, wondering if his dad was there. Two days ago - when his dad had cooked dinner again - everything had been back to normal. Sadly Hinata wasn't able to spend a lot of time with his dad since then, but he was sure he would get that back in the weekends.

"Dad, I am home!" It was answered by silence. The kitchen was dark and empty, so maybe the living room. He tiptoed — he didn't know why, but he had the feeling he had to be silent.

Hinata couldn't help but a feel a stab of disappointment when his dad was again sitting in his big chair. A lot of beer cans surrounding him, he was sleeping, his cheeks colored a bit red of the alcohol.

The last few weeks he had seen this image a hundred times. His dad had always been a bit of an alcoholic. This was the first time that Hinata felt this disappointed about it, maybe because he had expected his dad to change?

Well, he shouldn't be too hard on his father, he missed mom, just like Hinata and Natsu missed her. So, it was okay if he sometimes needed some alcohol to deal with that, right? Not that Hinata would every drink alcohol to deal with his problems, beer stinks.

Judging by the posture that his dad was sleeping in, he was gonna hurt his back. Hinata should wake him up and help him to bed.

Even though he knew his dad promised to never hurt him again, Hinata couldn't help but see the resemblance of this situation with the one where his dad had hit him. So carefully he walked over to his father.

"Dad, I think you should wake up. Dad?" Hinata carefully touched his shoulder. It was wet and sticky, probably had some beer spilled over it.

His father didn't wake up though, so Hinata gently shook his shoulder. This seemed to work. He squeezed his eyes a few times before opening.

"Whu, wh…ats going one?" He said drowsy.

"Dad, it's me, Shoyo. You fell asleep on the chair, but I think you should probably go to bed."

"Sho…Shoyo?" His dad seemed to have a hard time focusing. "I should go to bed. Yeah, you're right." He tried to stand up, but was clearly having a hard time maintaining his balance. Just like the last time, Hinata grabbed his shoulder to steady him. This time his dad allowed the help. That was a good thing right?

"Come on, let's go upstairs." Hinata guided his dad trough the living room towards the stairs. It was clear that his dad had drunken a lot. His breath stank of beer, and he couldn't walk straight. Hinata wasn't even sure that his dad knew what was going on right now.

The stairs were tricky, there were a few times that Hinata thought they were both going to fall to their death, but in the end they made it safe and sound. Hinata thanked god that Natsu was already in her room — she shouldn't have to see their dad like this — and quickly moved to his parents room.

When they were there his dad sat down on the bed and looked at him — or better, he tried to look at him, he still couldn't see straight.

"V…w…where have you been Shoyo. I missed you tonight?" A pang of guilt shot through Hinata. His dad had been all alone tonight and it was his fault.

"I was visiting mom."

"Mom? You were visiting your mother?" The words were still a bit of a blur, but it is also sounded angry. Again, Hinata couldn't help but see the resemblance of three nights ago and took a cautions step back. His dad seemed to notice this and sat up straight.

"You are afraid of me? My own son is afraid of me?" Hinata wanted to deny this, but couldn't. In reality, he did feel a bit scared of his father.

"My own son is a coward…no use for me in the end." He mumbled. Hinata couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt at this. He didn't want his dad to think he was useless, he wanted to help him. Why was Hinata not good enough yet, while he tried so hard.

"I am not a coward! Please dad, just tell me what to do!" He asked desperately.

"There is nothing you can do." Out of the blue, his dad stood up, he wavered a bit but was able to maintain standing up. "The only thing you do is use my hard worked money for your food and your school and you do nothing in return."

Hinata was looking at his father with big brown eyes, sucking in everything he was told, without being able to respond. His dad just kept going on with his rant.

"Your mom is very sick and that is your fault! You bother her all the time!"

His dad took a quick step towards him. Before Hinata knew what was happening, a big hand grabbed him by his collar. His dad raised him a bit, so Hinata had to stand on his toes.

Hinata froze. What was happening. Everything would be better, his dad had promised that just a few days ago.
Was Hinata so terrible that his dad wasn't able to keep that promise. He didn't understand.

"It is all your fault. Yeah, you should do better." Then there was the blow. Out of the blue his dad made a fist and punched him in his stomach. Hinata gasped for air. He trembled, but couldn't move. Tears welled up in his eyes. It was just one punch, but it felt like his stomach was gonna explode.

His dad held him by the collar for a few more seconds, before letting him go. Hinata fell on the ground. Both his hands immediately grabbed his stomach. Was this pain ever going to end?

"It is all your own fault. Just leave me alone." His dad mumbled, before turning around and passing out on the bed.
Hinata wasn't able to move. He just stared at his dad. Tears now flowing freely over his cheeks. Did this really just happen?

Was he really useless? Did his mother thought the same, but was she just too nice to break it to him? Hinata did visit his mother a lot in the hospital, but he thought she liked.

Was he wrong?

After a few minutes he remembered that Natsu was probably waiting on him. What was she gonna think? She couldn't see him crying, he was her big brother.

With a strength he didn't know he had, he pushed himself up and quietly left his dad's room. His father didn't notice, he looked like he was in a coma on the bed.

Hinata took a quick look in the mirror of the bathroom where he wiped the tears off his face. Rolling up his shirt, he saw the beginning of a big bruise on the right sight of his stomach.

Hinata wasn't at home in medical stuff, but he was sure that this bruise was gonna hurt for a longer period of time. There wasn't much he could do about it though.

Natsu needed to be tucked in. She needed to think everything was okay. Hinata had to make sure of that. So he tiptoed towards her room. However, when he opened the door, his little sister was already sound asleep in her bed. She had put her pajama top the other way around, but that didn't matter. Natsu looked so peaceful right now, it put a smile right back on his face.

He closed her door and tiptoed towards his own room. He tried to get out of his shirt. However, stretching his upper body hurt his stomach, so he decided to just leave it for now. He hadn't showered anyway, so a dirty T-shirt for the night wouldn't matter much. He crawled under his blanket and shut his eyes.

Hinata was sure that now he was safe and sound in his own bed, the tears would come back again, but they didn't.

In his brain he tried to justify what just happened. His dad had hurt him, a lot, but in the end he had all the right to do what he did. That was truth right? Hinata had visited his mother a lot without condoning it with his father.

Of course, Hinata would annoy his mother, she needed all the rest she could get, but instead had to spend all her energy on him. If Hinata had asked his dad about it, he would have told him not to go.

But of course Hinata didn't ask him. He was a dumbass and just assumed that both his parents would be okay with him visiting his mother all the time. He assumed that they would both like that.

To be honest, the real reason for visiting his mother wasn't because he thought she liked to see Hinata.
He visited her because he was the one who needed her, not the other way around. Hinata needed to see her smile and feel her love.

How had he not realized how selfish he had been? Luckily his dad was there to show him the truth.

Hinata couldn't help but feel frustrated. Why was he so bad at this? He tried to be a good son for his mother and father, something he was clearly failing in.

Another thing he was not good in, being a big brother for Natsu. In the end she had to fall asleep all on her own, cause Hinata didn't have the time to tuck her in.

Why couldn't he do better?

No wonder his dad thought of him as useless. What had Hinata done for him until now? Not much.

Everything that his dad had done, was the right thing to do. Hinata deserved it, he was sure.

-Haikyuu-

Still no beta-reader, so you gotta to bear with my spelling and grammar mistakes for now.

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Some might have noticed that I used a little part of a scene happening in season 2. I really wanted the team to go to Tokyo in the story, so therefor I used a bit of that episode for this chapter, however everything surrounding that will be a different then from the anime.

1SilverAndGold1: Thank you, my goal is to make this story as reaslistic as possible. I do hope that your friend is okay though (same goes for you, witnessing stuff like that is not easy and not okay). I have (luckily) never been in an abusive relationship before and I don't know anyone close who has been and I hope I never have to experience something like that. But I have researched some stuff and read some stories of people experiences on abuse for the sake of this story. It is always so heartbreaking to read what kind of effect it can have on people.

And a thanks to all the others who placed a review, followed or favorite!

See you next week!