Funerals have always been droll affairs. Ikeda Akiime's was no exception. If anything, it was sadder than most of the ones I've been to. The only people there were Sensei and me. Hin had been absent for weeks. Even death wasn't enough to bring her around.
I was thankful for it. There was no need to pretend to feel the way people expected me to. I wasn't happy about it mind you, but I wasn't about to break down over it. Akiime's death robbed me of a valuable resource more than a mother.
All I felt was a distant sort of sadness. The graves she was surrounded by added to it. Could you believe that the Ikeda family had their own section? Not that it was anything unique or exciting. A small sad patch for a family that was destined to die out.
Looking out at the headstones tugged at me more than Akiime's death. Over 30 graves marked with the same name I write on my tests. Mother spoke of them enough that I could tell who some graves housed. An uncle here, a cousin there, and now my mother. It was… disappointing to look at them. That all these people amounted to nothing.
A chill went through me when I imagined my gravestone sitting here—tucked away in a sad little corner of the grand Konoha graveyard. Destined to be forgotten before long. Time had already taken its toll in this place and that was before the family was all gone. It wasn't breaking down or destitute, just worn out. Like whatever life could be found in the graveyard had died along with its inhabits.
That would never be me. No matter what, I won't end up in some useless grave like this. I'll make sure this world remembers my name.
Sensei shifted in the corner of my eye. I peered back at the uncomfortable man. Silence didn't bother me. It seemed that a silent graveyard bothered him.
"Leave me. I'd like to be alone."
He looked like he had aged a decade upon hearing my words. I could understand the feeling. Time weighs down on you in a place like this. Goosebumps down the spine at the constant reminder of mortality. Graves peering back at you, beckoning almost.
Sensei left me behind without comment. I was grateful to be left alone with my thoughts. It had been a busy month. There wasn't a better place in Konoha to reflect on it.
I swear Shigaki-sensei is screwing with me. A month into my academy career and I hadn't been picked to spar a single time. Some of these brats have been in the ring four times already. Shizune has fought twice already! It wasn't like Sensei had given me a reason either. I was the youngest person here, but I wasn't the smallest. It wasn't like my skills were holding me back.
I easily placed in the top 5 for every practical test or training we did. None of which brought me closer to smacking some kids around. Sensei didn't want to see me fight for what I could only assume was a stupid reason.
Sensei needed to get over whatever hang-up he was dealing with. Just watching the other kids spar wasn't good enough for me. It gave me a decent idea of where I stacked up in the class, but it wouldn't bring me closer to my goal. Shinobi don't become great by having a lesson plan and dreams. Training could make you good. Great if you're talented enough. But the genuine elite were born of combat and strife. Chances to test my mettle were necessary for the future. Even when it was just beating the snot out of some kids.
All my waiting and watching had some advantages. I noticed a few more canon characters in the class—Asuma and Kurenai were the most important ones. The plan was to make a good impression on one of them down the line.
From what I remembered, Asuma was estranged from the Hokage. Likely not to matter at this age, but I'd rather not have myself associated with an open wound. It would be better to meet Hiruzen from a position of strength via Tsunade than as a friend of his brat.
Kurenai was more interesting at the moment, but not enough that I'd try to seek her out myself. Maybe once I have a better understanding of genjutsu. Today I'd just focus on my primary plan to kick all their asses.
I was also delighted to notice a bit of sexism in the class. Spars had only taken place against the same gender. Not a single girl had once fought a boy this past week. It was frustrating to encounter, more so because of how rarely I had found it in the ninja world. Konoha wasn't exactly an egalitarian paradise.
The Hokage could decide to start slitting throats if they thought it was the best choice of action. But chakra had brought a balance into the world that even my previous one lacked. Konoha especially valued meritocracy. Strength was above all else, and it bled into every facet of life.
Even on the civilian side, things were pretty equal. Women sat in similar numbers to men in council positions and were a good portion of business owners. The more traditional families and institutions still had prejudiced tendencies. Even then, it was possible for a woman to rise into power.
Seeing such a blatant display of sexism in this class was strange. I hadn't taken Sensei for being this kind of ass. He treated everyone equally terribly. I didn't see why he needed to change things up now. I would nip that in the bud before it became a problem. This week could go by unchallenged but not any longer. I'd be dead before I let my future be compromised by something as ridiculous as this.
My future opponent should be annoyed with Sensei for how agitated I've gotten. There wouldn't be any mercy in the spar regardless, but now I also had some frustration to work off. The pathetic display I watched in the ring wasn't helping my mood. Shizune was fighting a civilian-born girl. She wasn't going to beat Shizune. That much was clear. That it had gone on this long was what bothered me. Shizune has had multiple chances to lay this loser out. She'd taken none of them. Instead, the girl had decided a war of attrition was the best path to victory.
I would concede that attrition was a viable strategy between equals or those close enough. Few Shinobi had good staying power even when you looked at jonin. Using it on an opponent far beneath you was asking for an unfortunate death. It only takes one misstep to end up as a name on an ugly rock. And I would regard myself as an expert on stupid deaths.
The civilian girl surrendered due more to exhaustion than injury. Angering me more at the cowardice. No self-respecting ninja should ever give in like that. Better to give it everything and fail than never even try. I held my tongue when Shizune came back to my side. She got a stiff smile and a congratulatory nod for her poor efforts. The minor injuries that marked her body wouldn't be there if she had finished the fight earlier. A medic can't spend 30 minutes dealing with the enemy when five would do.
No use worrying over it now. I'd get her to come around to my way of thinking soon enough. A small sigh brought my attention back to her. Shizune was staring down at the ground with her hands gripped in frustration. It was sad enough that I had to throw her a bone.
"What's wrong?"
Anger flashed for a moment in her eyes, but it wasn't directed at me. "Sanano-san is the worst in our class and I still barely won."
I could somewhat understand her words behind the gritted teeth and sharp tone. Her reaction was one reason I found this friendship to be enjoyable. Shizune wasn't an airhead with idyllic dreams. The girl wanted to be more than a third-rate ninja who'd die worthless and forgotten. The girl hid vast ambition underneath the kindness. It reminded me of myself, though I mused that her kindness was the real deal. Shizune knew something was wrong with her approach. She just wasn't mature enough to figure out her problem. The anger at her failures and the deep-rooted desire to overcome them drew me to her all the more.
I felt a kindred spirit in the kind girl. We both wanted to be great and were willing to work hard for it. I'd be glad to help anyone with the same fire in their gut that drove them to succeed. I would still need to get something out of the exchange of course, but I'd be willing to give them a discount.
"We can spar after you help me with ninjutsu tomorrow." I grinned at her shy nod. She was unsure how practicing with a six-year-old would help, but was desperate enough to try.
She had agreed to help me with the academy 3 on the first day of class. But the closer we got to the day, the more she realized what that entailed. Meeting new people and engaging with them was arduous for the poor girl. I had told her I lived in a home large enough to fit the entire Ikeda family. The look of panic on her face was just delicious. Too bad that it slipped my mind to tell her there wasn't anyone else to meet.
She wouldn't have to worry long once she arrived tomorrow. I'd stay on my best behavior. Maybe even get sympathy points if I was lucky. Shizune needed to feel comfortable enough around me to introduce me to Tsunade. It would be a delightful bonus if I could get a sparring partner out of it too.
My training had suffered since mother left. Things just weren't progressing as fast as I wanted. Getting someone who could push me to further heights would go a long way to correct that.
We were quiet after making plans. Well I was. As much as I talked about her shyness, the moment Shizune got comfortable with you the girl became a chatterbox. I hope she never befriends Hin. There wouldn't be any peace in the village if those two got together. Sensei was looking up at me from the middle of the sparring ring stopped me from paying anymore attention to her.
A sharp nod was all it took for him to grit his teeth and give me what I wanted.
"Ikeda Rinko and Yuhi Kurenai."
Shizune gave me a worried look that only made me grin more. It was sweet of her. I'd make sure she never gave me a look like that again by the end of the spar. I was someone to be feared, not pitied.
Kurenai was on my short list of people I wanted to fight. She was talented and well-trained like Shizune. The difference was Kurenai had a chip on her shoulder a mile wide. The girl fought meaner than most. She wanted to prove herself to the world and what better way than a fight. Her three previous matches had been the roughest the class had seen.
I take back all the bad things I thought about you Sensei. Thank you for the meal and all that other stuff.
I was down in the ring facing her before I even remembered moving. She was taller and bigger than me, but I wasn't worried about our difference in stature. Mother had a much more significant advantage than a preteen girl.
The class made it obvious who they preferred with few cheers of 'Kurenai' before the match began. One came from a girl whose nose she had broken in her first spar! The difference in our support didn't perturb me. Kurenai was a cute girl who was kind when she wasn't swinging at you. I'd seen her give tips to the other students while training.
The class's encouragement reminded me to add moral support to what Shizune needed to work on. She graced me with a scared look and mouthed 'be careful' when I looked at her. Not exactly the pick-me-up I'd be looking for when going into battle. At least Kurenai was taking me seriously. She had been evaluating me with a critical eye since I stepped into the circle.
Kurenai moved the moment the match started. She was quick and had used her speed well in the previous bouts. Unfortunately for her, I was just that bit faster. I weaved around three punches before she changed tactics. A click of the tongue was my only admission of annoyance.
There had been an opening between the swings, but I let it go by to show off to the class. The feeling of mother's disappointment had me cringing at myself. I needed to check my ego before it checked me. It took a lot of confidence to become great. It took a lot less arrogance to end up dead.
We circled for a moment before I pushed forward. Kurenai had preferred using her right side in all her previous spars. The worst blows she had received came from retaliation on the left. A quick plan guided my actions as I increased the pressure on her.
She was good enough that I'd need one. Each block was textbook and dodges expertly flowed into aggression. The showcase of skill made her flaws all the more glaring. It was like she'd only practiced fighting with half her body. Blocks from the left were sloppy, and the attacks lacked power. It didn't stop her from taking a chance whenever she spotted an opportunity. I'd make that instinct her undoing.
I made my move during a quick flurry of blows. It was easy enough to fake a trip and botched dodge. A heavy swing came towards me, and I grinned at my success. Quick as lightning, I flowed around the fist and began with a—CRACK.
Stars, pain, blood, and a sore arm greeted me. Kurenai had kicked her left leg up faster than any movement I'd seen her make before. Instinct had guided my arm into an ugly block. That alone was what kept me from being knocked out. Our positions had flipped immediately. Kurenai came at me at a brutal pace I could barely manage. She'd been holding back the whole time, and I just walked right into it.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. How many times have I watched her practice this week? Kata, throwing, running, climbing, and in everything else, had never shown signs of her favoring one side over the other. Only during spars did this 'weakness' show itself. The future Goddess of Shinobi had been played by a nine year old and was paying dearly for it.
She reminded me of a slower version of my mother, relentless when smelling blood in the water. A noise broke through the ringing and pain. It took a few more hasty dodges until I realized it was my laughter.
I was so fucking excited that I couldn't help it. I was finally fighting someone who pushed me but wasn't unbeatable. The exertion ended my joyful laughs, but the grin stuck through it all. It would get wiped off soon enough if I didn't change things. Pain rang through me and I was feeling dizzy. Kurenai was doing better on the injury side of things, but the last exchange had fatigued her greatly.
Thank goodness for Mother's insane conditioning schedule. It gave me enough of an edge to overcome my stupidity. I was gracious enough to let Kurenai catch her breath. That the room was still spinning is unrelated.
My mind had been racing ever since she clocked me. How to turn this around and how much to reveal? I had little besides senbon and poison up my sleeves. Though I'd rather no one besides Hin knew about that. You never know when someone needs to be murdered in a way that couldn't be tied back to you.
I could release the weight seals. It defeated the entire purpose of them though. Not to mention the fact that I had only just started using them. There were only 25 extra pounds of weight on me. It would be enough to give me a decent boost. It wasn't enough for me to go Rock Lee on her.
Just think for a moment. What do we know, what do we have, and what can we do with it?
Kurenai is just as quick as me with my weights on. She's smart enough to change tactics when something isn't working. Can't push her advantage long because of stamina. She is a devious little shit, but I doubt there is something else up her sleeve. I'm better than her at using kunai. The lack of feeling in my left arm made that a null point. I could still throw with my right arm, but I'd be in trouble if she pulled out two weapons in response.
I'd have to choose my moment if I was going to throw something. The last piece of the puzzle was the sparring arena. A big circle filled with dirt. It would have to do.
Kurenai was still trying to catch her breath, but it wouldn't last long. We'd only paused for a couple of seconds. A brief time, even for shinobi, but it was two seconds that I could have been using to my advantage.
Better late than never I thought, dashing forward. Kurenai took a defensive stance. The exhaustion ignored in the face of a threat. A harsh stomp brought me into the air for a quick spinning axe kick. She pulled back rather than take it head-on. I followed through all the way to the ground. Kicking up a cloud of dirt right onto the other girl via a blast of chakra.
I flung three shurikens through the cloud where Kurenai was. A pained grunt was the perfect signal to advance. My hamstrings feel like tearing off from my improvised dynamic entry. The hard impacts made the pain well worth it. The move took Kurenai by surprise, and she was flung back to the arena's edge.
I came bearing down on her before she could get back to her feet. Her arms snapped into a cross to absorb the blow from my knee. The block was commendable. She might have had a chance to recover in an actual fight. In this one she got crumpled outside of the ring.
The class could've been cheering and I wouldn't have heard it. Blood rushing and a pounding head had become my soundtrack to the fight. The abrupt end of it had left me feeling weak-legged and exhilarated. I might've still been dead the past six years for how alive I felt at this moment.
Kurenai was looking a lot closer to death. She was pale-faced, bruised, and had minor cuts where the training shuriken had struck her. Poor thing was gasping for breath on her knees. The urge to laugh and gloat at her boiled up. Lucky for me, some idiot had kicked up a bunch of dirt into the air. A sharp intake of breath turned a laugh into a harsh cough. I accepted the karma for what it was and moved to help Kurenai stand.
Guess she forgot the seal of reconciliation. I used it when I bent down to pick her up, and she only stuck out a middle finger.
"Good fight," I said to her instead.
A glare was the only response she gave before turning away and walking towards her friends who had gathered around. I was too high on victory to mind the slight. Turning around to—smack! Shizune had crashed into me to deliver a tight hug. I quickly returned it with the arm I could still feel. She mumbled into my shirt, bringing another laugh out of me. The sweet girl looked up and tried to give me a stern look, but her smile betrayed her feelings.
The smile turned severe after a moment and she asked, "Can you help me?" I only raised an eyebrow at her. Giving a silent push to dig an even deeper hole. "I'm weak… I've always been weak no matter how hard I try. Please help me become strong like you."
Perfect, just absolutely perfect.
"Of course Shizune-chan. You didn't even have to ask. Friends have to look out for each other right?" She radiated joy at my words. I was grateful for the warning squeal before she dove into an even tighter hug. My arm throbbed in protest, but I readily ignored it. It takes a bit of pain to grow strong after all.
Sensei kicked us out of the ring after poking my arm to ensure it wasn't broken. Shizune skipped up the stairs to our seats. I was more lackadaisical on my journey. It was hard work walking and fantasizing about super strength simultaneously. Kurenai's evil glare earned a lovely grin for me that only made her angrier. I just wish her seat was closer to mine. I finally had a kid I could bully, and she had the nerve to sit all the way across the room.
I knew lording my superiority over the commoners would be fun. Hopefully, Kurenai feels like continuing the animosity past today. It would be good to have someone to push me like that. A little malice made training much more productive.
Sitting down next to Shizune was a welcome relief from the excitement, though she carried a lot of excitement herself. She needed to keep being assured that I'd be happy to help her get better and that we would still start tomorrow after she helped me with ninjutsu.
I wasn't too worried about learning the academy jutsu. I use chakra every day. Though the dirt blast wasn't precisely a jutsu, it proved that I could use chakra as a weapon. If Naruto could figure them out there shouldn't be any problem on my end. Yet the little voice in the back of my head wouldn't stop worrying. Could I do this? My previous attempts at learning new techniques gave a resounding shrug.
It only took an afternoon for me to get the basics of tree-walking down. My chakra sang to me, for lack of a better word. It wanted to be used and directed, even when I was just strengthening my muscles or practicing control. That eagerness helped me refine my control to a level above most of my classmates before I'd ever entered the academy. It also tended to make the first time I tried something fail spectacularly. The first time I strengthened my muscles we had to rush to the doctor for a badly sprained ankle, the first time I tried leaf training I put a hole in the roof, and the first time I tried Tree-climbing my first step blew a mass of bark off. That last one ended up being useful. Kurenai likely would have won if we had fought earlier this week. Thank goodness chakra blows up dirt as easily as it does trees.
The biggest mistakes never last long. My chakra seemed much more well-behaved after it got some excitement out of the way. It still took a lot of work to perfect things, but I think my learning curve was better than most. Today would put that theory to the test. I told Shizune to get here bright and early and the doorbell ringing let me know she listened.
I wasn't expecting her to knock on the door only a moment after the ring echoed through the house. Jeez, I knew you were excited to get here, but isn't this a little much? I skipped to the door and yanked it open. "Welcome to my humble abode. Whaaaaat the hell?" Shizune was standing outside. Red-faced with her head in her hands, a relatively normal sight. Next to her was an arm crossed, grumpy-faced, and entirely unapologetic Kurenai. A somewhat abnormal sight.
"Rinko-chan I didn't… she just…I'm sorry!"
"Wait you're making it sound like I forced you to..."
I raised an eyebrow at Kurenai, and her face took on a delightful shade of red. Her being here was surprising, but her motivation was obvious. I'd even prefer having her around for training. The more people who could push me the better. Of course she would have to give me something else in return. "Kurenai-san if you hurt Shizune I won't forgive you."
Both their faces turned an even darker shade of crimson. The equivalent of two chipmunks were struggling to explain themselves in front of me. It was disturbing that two future throat-slitters could still be this cute. "Rinko-chan stop laughing!"
I invited them inside after I regained my composure, graciously playing the role of a suitable host. They better hope mother has good taste in tea. Also, was tea being a calming force normal or did Konoha have some weird genetic disposition towards it?
Either way, both girls seemed to relax the moment after receiving their cups. This phenomenon needed intense investigation. I could've easily killed them both with a simple poison. My youth would help disguise any weird taste as an amateur mistake. Was their comfort because of familiarity with me or trust towards fellow Konoha citizens? As I pondered homicide, the two hummed along, enjoying the tea without a care in the world.
It was time to put a slight damper on the content mood the room found itself in. "I know why Shizune-chan is here. She was invited. I just can't figure out why you're here Kurenai-san."
Shizune immediately started looking nervously at us. She wanted to say something, the words just wouldn't form on her tongue. Kurenai must be a nicer person than me. While I was enjoying watching the shy girl struggle, Kurenai whispered to her that it was okay to before turning to face me.
"I want to train with you two."
"Oh? Well I see what you get out of it. But how does that help us? Shizune has the best chakra control and we only need two people for sparring." I had to give said girl a quick kick underneath the table to keep her from speaking up. I was trying to steal candy from a baby, now isn't the time to grow a spine.
Kurenai was biting her lip. I could see the hamster wheel puffing smoke out her ears. Her voice was hesitant but sharp, like she was divulging a dark secret, "My dad thinks women should specialize as kunoichi. He's taught me some genjutsu. I could teach it to you too." There was venom in her voice at the mention of her father's views. She was being pushed into a box before her career even began. Ironic for what kind of kunoichi she'd become.
I can't imagine how frustrating it is to be prodigious in a path forced upon you. I think Kurenai would get the last laugh in the end. She often gets mocked for losing to Itachi, but being a jonin meant you were a killer among killers. She'd be able to take out 90% of shinobi with ease in about 15 years. Probably more than that with how rare expert genjutsu users were.
I'd gladly take anything she'd give me. Now I just had to make her feel like she wanted to instead of needed to. I put on a bright smile and gave a little laugh, "I'm sorry Kurenai-san. I had to bully you a bit cause of my sore arm. You can train with us anytime you want. No need to teach us the family secrets." Shizune let out a relieved sigh and grabbed Kurenai's hands.
"Rinko-chan is always teasing. I told you everything would be okay. She's kind when you get to know her." Kurenai deflated at the sweet, if not entirely accurate words. Shizune is the best unknowing accomplice a girl could ask for. Delivering someone for me to use and pulling the noose tight on her at the perfect time.
"Thank you so much. None of the girls in class take training seriously. But I don't want to be a burden to you. We can still work on genju—"
"You don't have to teach us anything. Just wanting to get better with us is more than enough." I rarely got a smile for interrupting someone, but Kurenai seemed happy about it. I decided just to seal her fate. "But if you feel like you must. There is one thing you could do to help."
"What do you need?"
"Would you be our friend Kurenai-san?" Shizune squealed at the beautiful smile on her new friend's face. The Cheshire grin I sported was probably for different reasons. Friendship is truly a wonderful thing. I'd do my best to ensure the next person I roped into orbit was an adult. My brain did funny things whenever I thought about the fact that I was taking advantage of little girls.
"She makes those faces when she's thinking Kurenai-san. You'll get used to it."
Our third musketeer fit into the group quite nicely. She gave a rundown of her personal training routine, and we tried to mix it with ours. She had less time dedicated to training than I did. Both of them actually. They looked shocked when I told them my routine. Heck, they got the watered-down version and still looked at me like I was crazy. Good to know that my mother was obsessive and this wasn't the norm. I didn't see myself breaking out of the habit anytime soon. I'd have to work around the girls' break time whenever we train together.
We went into conditioning and agility practice after stretching. Kurenai made it clear how she managed to be so skilled. From the very beginning, she put her all into training. To her credit, Shizune was just as willing to put in the work. I noticed a big difference in how they approached working even though the results were the same.
Kurenai turned everything into a silent competition. Running, climbing, dashing, and especially the agility course turned into challenges against us. Having someone to compare herself to gave her motivation to push harder than she could. Shizune's motivation was almost entirely internal. She would train hard whether or not someone was there.
If I had to guess she it was probably better than what Kurenai did when there wasn't anyone else around. I just wished she would show the same self-confidence in a fight.
I wasn't sure how well they knew each other before, but Kurenai was going to be good for Shizune's demeanor. She would compliment her form and the effort she was giving and gave pointers when appropriate. I could see why Hinata had enjoyed being placed in the woman's care. Kurenai and I weren't quite so lovey-dovey with each other. The honeymoon period for our new friendship hadn't lasted long. Kurenai was gruffer with me. Giving me a smug smile or a glowering look depending on who she thought did better on an exercise. I made sure to be the mature one in the relationship. Never once did I disparage or gloat. No, all I did was stick my tongue out and laugh when she tripped during a jog.
The morning had gone better than I dared to hope. It was… nice to have other people around during training. Doing it without mother had been odd. On the other hand, it was nice to finally have some alone time.
It was noon when we finally finished physical training and moved on to ninjutsu. Shizune was excellent at the academy three. Kurenai was decent at clones and substitution. All her transformations came out lumpy. I couldn't help but laugh at the first one she showed us. It looked like a doughy statue of sensei that someone had baked halfway and then left to rot. Even Shizune giggled when the bumps started turning red from embarrassment. The incredible dough girl went off to the side to practice more while Shizune walked me through the basics.
Chakra had an ebb and flow to it that wasn't easy to describe. It was as if someone had shrunk an ocean down, copied it a hundred times, and then layered them on top of one another. There were tides and flows that blurred into muscles and bone.
Or like walking into an empty field of flowers, only to slowly realize that you are surrounded by a million living breathing things. Beautiful in the way that each new breath you take is. The realization that being alive is a miracle and chakra is that miracle given voice.
Shizune focused on the hand seals used in each one. Slowly walking through how each should feel and how much chakra is used. My chakra was happy to be guided, the waves transforming into an elaborate dance under my skin. I could see why hand seals were still used by experts. The patterns of chakra needed for even the simplest jutsu were complex.
I understood that repetition would eventually allow you to do it one-handed or without any. Hard to imagine getting there from where I was. I'd get there eventually. Something like this would be child's play to me before I was done.
"I think you're ready. Go ahead and give it a try." You don't have to tell me twice. My hands flicked into a quickDog Boar Ram.The poof of smoke was more surprising than I expected, and I took a quick step back in response. Only to end up tripping on nothing and falling on my rear. That the technique worked killed the sting of Shizune's laughter. She still could've made sure I was okay first.
"Did it turn out well at least?"
"Good enough that you shouldn't let Kurenai-san see it. Great for your first time. There's some discoloration on the abdomen and your left femur is jutting out further than it should," Shizune had no regard for modesty as she poked and prodded all over my new body. Her future medic side took over as she cataloged the inconsistencies in my fake body. Way more than what would be acceptable in the future, but a lot better than lumpy over there. Shizune gave me a few more pointers before leaning back to admire my handiwork.
"I wasn't ready for you to become an older version of yourself. Most people choose a parent or teacher."
"Huh?"
"That's what you based the transformation on right? An older version of yourself."
I gave a lazy nod before undoing the technique. The transformation jutsu was too helpful for me not to practice it. I wish it didn't feel like bugs were crawling up and down my spine while it was active. Shizune thinking I transformed into an older version of myself was flattering, if incorrect. I was going for a slightly older Haku, but I'd take the compliment. We spent a few moments just chatting before getting back to work. The grind stops for no one.
The rest of the afternoon passed quickly. I performed each of the academy 3 successfully at least once. Even if the substitution technique kept on leaving my clothes behind. My adult brain was mortified before I realized I was six and the other girls were laughing. Shizune would be spared my wrath, but vengeance would come for the other one when she least expected it.
The only friction came when the other girls would take short breaks while I continued working on perfecting my new ninjutsu or trying out Shizune's crazy control exercises. The other two didn't come out and call me crazy… well Kurenai did.
Her opinion doesn't matter so I kept at it. When both of them tried to get me to sit down and relax I gave it a shot. But I just couldn't handle sitting still. Mother didn't let me rest more than necessary. A hard habit to break after a few years.
We would stay busy from sunrise to sunset. I can still hear her voice, telling me I'd never become great without giving great effort. None of the advice she'd given me had turned wrong yet. I wasn't expecting that to change soon. The two girls were just being overly dramatic like children often are. I rested at least once a day each week. Sometimes two if the doctor ordered! I never skipped a meal either. I followed the nutrition schedule exactly for each meal.
I made a futile effort to convince them to keep the same pace as me. Neither would entertain the thought. It was as disappointing as it was expected. They didn't have the knowledge I did.
Ordinary people didn't have the drive to keep pushing when their body was begging them to stop. Desperation born of knowing the future kept me going. A great work ethic wasn't enough for me to become legendary. You needed a mix of it and talent. My own paled compared to people like Minato or Hiruzen. People like that were born halfway up the path to greatness. I'd have to scratch and claw for every step I took on it.
Whatever it took is what I'd do. If slitting Shizune's throat would bring me a step closer to greatness, I wouldn't even hesitate to start carving. Oh, believe me when I say that I would hate myself for it.
That I did might make it even worse. Animal instinct could be understood and forgiven. Tigers aren't evil for ripping gazelles limb from limb. It was just in their nature. Someone like me didn't deserve that kind of sympathy. I liked Shizune. Given time, I might even grow to love the sweet girl. It still wouldn't stop me from doing whatever was necessary. Right or wrong was meaningless in the face of power. The gift of life had been stolen from me once before. It would never happen again. If I was going to die, it would be because I decided I'd had enough of living.
Would it surprise you if I said I was grateful to be born in this world? Brutal, unforgiving, and authoritarian as it was, this new life gave me opportunities that were unimaginable elsewhere. Gods of shinobi had been created from ordinary men. A Goddess would rise above them all before long.
Visions of grandeur were interrupted by Shizune's determined voice, "I'm ready to spar Rinko-chan."
My prior thoughts made me want to put the whole thing before I crushed my reservations. It was useless to feel guilty about things that might never happen.
"Kurenai-san keep track of any mistakes we make. The match will end when one of us calls it or if I've seen enough."
Time to get to work.
"You'd probably be proud of me if you were still here. I've done everything you taught me to do. Found people to teach me the things you couldn't. I've even started training more than we used to." The wind rustled through the graves, but it gave no indication of a response.
"I've made a couple of friends. They come over about twice a week for training. I think you would've liked them." She would have been better for them as well. I could make suggestions and try to adapt some of our training to better fit. Mother would have been able to connect everything perfectly. Shizune especially would have benefited much more from having her around. She's been doing better even after just a month of work, but I wasn't pulling out all her potential.
A loud pop drew my gaze towards the center of the village. Konoha had come more alive as the sun sank beneath the horizon. I could see little fireworks going off and lanterns being lit in celebration. The ending of the war had returned a sense of joyousness that I didn't realize the village was missing. Anything would be more joyful than what I was doing. The weight of expectation had kept me here instead of joining in on the festival. I should be going from stall to stall with Shizune and Tsunade, worming my way into their family unit.
"Instead you just had to go ahead and die. If you were going to be weak you could've at least been less selfish."
I could have been another orphan girl for Tsunade to take under her wing if mother had died a day earlier. Now I'd have to play the waiting game and pray she didn't abandon Konoha before we were introduced.
I doubt my mother cared whether it bothered me or not. The afterlife was real in this world, but that just meant she knew I wasn't her actual daughter. Sorry about all the work you put into a fake, I thought with a snort. It was too late to worry about any of that. She was dead and I wasn't. Isn't that all that matters?
AN:
A bit longer chapter than usual. I don't know if they'll stay a similar size or not. Depends on how often I can write I suppose.
The academy phase keeps extending further than I was planning. I think I'll try to speed it up in the next chapter or two.
I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. Please let me know if something should be changed or if you enjoyed it.
Update: Fixed wording