Stan Squared

Dipper froze as he heard a loud creak. He'd been sneaking out to investigate the puke fairy, which was easier to find at two a.m. on a Saturday morning, he knew Grunkle Stan wouldn't care, but he didn't want to bring Mabel along because she was sick, and he knew she'd insist on coming if she knew he was going out.

"This is Stan and I was wrong," a dark suited figure hummed as he worked on adding fins to a stuffed aardvark.

"Grunkle Stan?" Dipper said in surprise, as Grunkle Stan was a deep sleeper and hard to wake before seven, plus he wouldn't normally wear his Mr. Mystery clothes unless he had tourists to fleece.

"Dipper!" Stan said spinning around and looking panicky.

"Wait a minute," Dipper said as he noticed how sparkly 'Grunkle Stan' looked. "Wax-Grunkle Stan?"

"You caught me, kid," the wax replica replied with a sigh. "I was just working on a new attraction."

A loud snore came through the wall, letting dipper know Grunkle Stan was fine, and making him give thanks once more than he and Mabel had the room farthest from his.

"You aren't planning on trying to kill and replace Stan are you?" Dipper asked the wax replica of Grunkle Stan suspiciously.

"What? No!" the wax figure replied. "With him fleecing the suckers during the day and me touching up the attractions during the night we're raking it in!"

"That does sound like you," Dipper admitted.

"Two Stans are better than one, kid," the wax man said knowingly.

"Okay, you have fun with that," Dipper said, "I have to go investigate something."

"Have fun, Dipper," Wax-Stan said turning back to what he was working on. He sighed heavily once Dipper was gone. "Two Stans are better than one, kid," he repeated sadly, recalling past events.

"Chug, chug, chug!" Dipper chanted, eying the fairy circle from his hiding spot in the bushes. Looking down at the book in his lap he found the next verse of the summoning spell, "Dude, I bet I can finish that whole pitcher in one breath!"

With a loud pop and a flash of blue light a small, fat winged man, wearing a toga appeared—flew in circles and crashed into the ground, lifting his tiny head to mumble, "Dude, who moved the ground?"

"Gotcha!" Dipper yelled leaping out from behind the bushes.

"Arrgh!" The tiny figure clutched his chest and keeled over.

"Ahhh!" Dipper yelled and immediately ran over and checked on the figure. Thankfully his life guard training had included CPR because for the second time this summer he was being forced to use his training to care for a mythological creature.

Once he'd gotten the small man's heart restarted and gotten him breathing on his own, Dipper returned and caught his breath.

"Dude! you saved my life!" the little man said, staring at Dipper.

"Well, it was kinda my fault you almost died," Dipper admitted, wondering if he should erase the memory of his camcorder, as this didn't exactly make him look good.

"It happens," the small fae said unconcerned. "The blessing of the puke faeries is upon you for your kindness and for being a great kisser, bye!" The little man vanished in a burst of light.

Dipper picked up his camcorder and erased the memory. "Yep, no one is seeing this one."

Mabel groaned as she woke up, she felt horrible! Her stomach was in open rebellion and she was about to try and crawl out of bed when Dipper put his hand on her forehead and the feeling of nausea drained out of her. "Love you, bro," she said, half awake and drifting off once more.

"Love you too, sis," he replied tucking her in with his left hand while holding his right hand away from her. "Now what the hell am I going to do with this?" he asked, staring at the sickly green glow coating his right hand as he walked downstairs.

"I told you before, Robbie don't bother me at work," Wendy said.

"Dipper, you wanna take care of this jerk?" Stan asked, knowing Dipper didn't like Robbie and would get a kick out of running him off.

Dipper glanced at his right hand and smiled. "I got it Grunkle Stan. Hey Robbie, are you ok, man? You look sick."

Wax Works

Dipper waited till everyone was asleep before going to see Wax-Stan. He wasn't checking up on him so much as visiting him so he wouldn't get lonely. When he looked into Stan's workroom he was surprised to see himself already there. "Mabel?" he guessed.

"Mabel," Wax-Dipper agreed. "She still has a lot of wax left from us err you two melting down the cursed figures."

"I wonder who she's going to make next," Dipper said.

"I think she was planning on making Soos," Wax-Dipper said. "Hey, see if you can get her to make a Wendy that's our size."

"I'll try," Dipper promised. "If you guys need anything let me know, ok?"

"Will do, kid, and thanks," Wax-Grunkle Stan said knowing why Dipper visited even if he never said it aloud.

A week later

"Hey guys," Dipper called out. "Mabel said she was running low on wax after making Soos, so she actually listened when I talked about making a smaller Wendy. She finished up earlier and put her in Soos' break room." Dipper held up the Presidential key. "Want a sneak peak before the official unveiling tomorrow?"

"You know it!" Wax-Dipper said excitedly.

The two rushed off while Wax-Soos and Wax-Stan worked on making souvenirs for the tourists.

"Ready?" Dipper asked, finding it funny to see his duplicate self dancing from one foot to another in excitement.

"Yes!"

Dipper whipped the sheet off the figure and they both stared as she stretched and yawned, slowly coming awake.

"I think I just blew a lobe," the two Dippers chorused.

"Whoa!" the short redhead said, rubbing her temples, "Major head rush."

"So… what's your name?" Wax-Dipper asked.

"Bell Pines," she replied. "I didn't… I mean, Mabel didn't have enough wax to make two more figures so she combined herself and Wendy."

"I have a lot of conflicting emotions right now," Wax-Dipper said.

"You aren't the only one," Bell said. "I'm still trying to get my head on straight. I got two sets of memories here and man, you are a lot more awesome than you let on," she told Dipper.

"Is Mabel pranking me or you with Bell?" Wax-Dipper asked.

Bell laughed in that uniquely Mabel way.

"She doesn't know about us, so it has to be you," Wax-Dipper replied. "Of course now that Bell knows of us it'll be both."

Typing by: Stephenopolos