There was a lot I wanted to cover, so I did several episodes. Some of this seems unexpected for Val's character, but that's because this was the happy version of these characters. Val's form notes that he has some cruel and even sadistic tendencies and isn't usually good to his friends. I didn't go as much into that since this is the nice CR. It's probably more evident in the other CRs.

Val Vella- Victor

There were some perks to winning an unconventional Games. The coronation happened right at the finale, and it was Isabella instead of Snow. She was, in a conservative estimate, at least five times as pretty as Snow. It was pretty funny how they used the immunity necklace instead of a crown. Then there were a ton of parties and after-parties, which was sweet. I was embarrassed saying it to anyone, but I hated knowing it would end. All too soon the others would go back to their homes and out of my life past letters and Capitol events. Soon we wouldn't be a tribe anymore. We'd be a former tribe. I'd never had a tribe before. I hadn't known how much I would love it.

Survivor was, funny enough, the most relaxing time of my life. On the island, 'Survivor' was just a name. The worst that could happen was going home, not getting shot in the streets because you pissed off the wrong guy, or every little stomach pain making you wonder if this is the day one of your "friends" poisoned you for your money. Sure, we were all jockeying for the win, but we LIKED each other. Those weren't fake tears when we thought Trayne was dying. Kallik and I weren't really an item, but we really were friends. Lana and Octavia were so close Lana's first worry about getting eliminated was that Octavia would feel bad. We were a bunch of kids on a grand adventure and we'd made bonds the Capitol hadn't dreamed of. And now I was seeing firsthand why they called the winner the sole survivor.

"You know any good shrinks?"

I wasn't embarrassed about seeing a therapist. I just had such a reputation for being the carefree jokester Don Juan. It was a big change, being serious and asking for help. It was one thing to be known for a persona you put up. It was something else to be known. But I'd known Isabella for months now and she seemed trustworthy.

She proved me right with her reaction. "Ooh, good idea. Every Victor should see a therapist." She made a face in lieu of saying the million reasons. "You never know which therapist will work for which person. Luckily, I know dozens."

It only took three to find a good connection. Funny how a prim, intellectual, ancient old lady like Dr. Marsh could understand someone like me so well. The main theme of our discussions was usually trying to help me reframe my worldview to fit my new world. I'd been looking over my shoulder for half my life- since I was nine years old. It was going to take some effort to convince my brain that I wasn't in danger anymore and the whole world wasn't my enemy. I could make friends and just… that was it. Just make friends. No negotiations, no gauging the risk, no trial periods where I waited for said friend to try to kill me. And also, I needed to stop making friends based on what they could do for me. I had everything I needed now. I could be friends with someone just because I liked them. Finally, and most embarrassingly, Dr. Marsh told me that in order to have a good friend, I needed to BE a good friend. No more using people for what they did for me and then disappearing whenever they needed help. It was selfish, but what helped most was remembering everyone else was just like me. I had all these things I hid to protect myself. They had their own hurts and insecurities. A real friendship is two people helping each other. I was finally ready for that.

"Maybe someday you'll write a happy ending."

Isn't that just a memoir title? Jason wasn't wrong, though. The Capitol loved my chosen talent of theater writing and acting. It had escaped no one's notice, though, that I favored harsh plots and sometimes unhappy endings. The characters I wrote for myself were always angry and hurt and usually had at least one dramatic outburst. I wasn't entirely sure if Jason was making a simple comment or if he was trying to give some subtle encouragement.

"We all have an ugly side. Better to let it all out here than in the real world," I said. Dr. Marsh said the dark part of me would always be there. Therapy and neurology and metaphysics were so hard to tease apart. It was hard to know what was the brain, what was the mind, and what was you. Just you- your personality, your essence, the thing that makes you you and no one else. She said antisocial personality disorder- which I didn't qualify for, but had shades of- was something to be managed, not removed. It hadn't shown much on the island- in fact, it showed there less than it ever had in my life. I'd been so happy that my dark side hadn't come out. But it was still true that I had a history of abandoning friends, and telling people whatever they wanted to hear to get them to do something for me, or feeling perverse satisfaction when I saw someone in pain. It sounded pretty bad when I really thought about it. But Dr. Marsh said actions were more important than thoughts. I had those thoughts and I couldn't control that. I could control how I handled them, though. Screaming and raging on a stage was a lot better than how I'd been handling it before.

"And I suppose the love interest is a pretty mixed-race girl with wavy hair who's tough and no-nonsense but also quietly supportive?" Maia teased.

"The audience always responds so positively," I deflected. Maybe my love interests did always resemble a certain someone. She just happened to be a really cool person and the characters always turned out cool. So I had good taste- what's to insult?

"Just talk to her, bro," Jason urged. "She's gonna figure it out too and it's gonna look really weird unless you tell her."

"It'll be weird, though," I said. "What's Isabella gonna do if I break her niece's heart?" She was the one who'd introduced me to Maria. Looking back, she was clearly playing matchmaker, but my nosy friends didn't need to know that.

"Easy," Maia said. "Just don't break her heart."

"I don't know what to do."

It was a stroke of luck that just days after that I had a meet-and-greet with Leo and Shep. Every now and then some Capitol fat cat wanted to have a private appearance from some section of the cast or another. Usually it was the final three- only the best for a fat cat. So Leo, Shep and I would get carted off to the Capitol and listen to some bore asking the same questions and saying how if he'd been there, he'd have gotten the fire started in minutes and hunted us all a bear. You know, those bears that weren't on the island since it was artificial and they didn't want us getting mauled.

"I've never been this nervous about a lady before," I continued as Leo and I sat in my living room munching Capitol pastries. Surely Leo would have some advice. Leo actually cared about people, and it came naturally. He didn't have to learn it like I did. Meanwhile Shep was out doing whatever it was he liked to do during these events. Probably hiding in the library because it was quiet.

"What is it you're looking for?" Leo asked.

"I want to do it right this time. I want this one to last. I gotta shape up and do right by her. I want to support her and be a good partner. It's really weird. When I think of her, I don't even think of her face or her boobs. I think about what she's like and how cool she is." I did like her face and her boobs. It just wasn't the only thing I liked.

Leo gave a knowing smile. "Oh, you love her."

"I've loved lots of people." I waved a hand dismissively. They weren't like this.

"No, you've lusted for lots of people. Not trying to judge you, but that was lust. Now you're in love, and that's something else entirely."

"Ugh." My remark wasn't directed at love in general. It was just, love was so mushy. So vulnerable. So risky. I'd always loved my free, unfettered, selfish life. If Leo was right when he talked about love in the past, love was the most unselfish thing possible. "I'm not even sure I know what love is."

"Love is putting someone else first, even when you lose out. It's trusting they'll do the same but never knowing for sure. It's always partly faith," Leo said. His face, so bright when he talked about love, went troubled. "You know what love is? Right now I'm trying to figure out the best way to tell Octavia we should break up. She just got out of an abusive relationship. We're both so young, and she was so controlled all her life, and we're both running on emotion in this relationship. What we have is infatuation." He sighed. "I think I love her. My best evidence is that I'm going to tell her she should take some time to herself to heal and discover life. That's what love is. My love for Octavia is to want what's best for her even if it means I can't have her."

There, at least, was a problem I could help with. "If it makes you feel any better, she's been thinking the same. She's worried you'll be sad, but she's reached the same conclusion.

Leo smiled. "Well that worked right out, then."

I'd always known Leo was a good guy. I hadn't known just how great he was for her, though. "If you ever cross paths again, I hope you shoot your shot. Not to get mushy but, if things should ever change, of course Octavia is her own person, but for what it's worth, you have my blessing."

"I'm glad to hear it," Leo said. "Now let's get you your blessing."

When Leo described love, I knew right away he was right, but it took me a long time to understand it. I understood it in bits and pieces. I understood a little when Isabella and Octavia set up a surprise date for me and Maria and when it all went to pieces, my first thought wasn't that I was embarrassed, but that Maria might be and that I should cover for her. I understood a little when Maria and I were sitting on the beach doing nothing but looking at the water, and I couldn't think of anything I wanted more. I understood a little when I saw Lana at her wedding, and a dozen of my other castmates at theirs. I understood it in Leo's continued ministry in the face of a nation that would kill him for one wrong move. I thought I understood it all when I promised I'd love Maria until death did us part. Then I was holding a baby girl and learning love went so much farther than I'd ever imagined.

Fans commented sometimes that it was funny I had so many sad endings in my stories when my own life was a parade of happy endings. Maria and I had three awesome children. My kids had the security and comfort that I'd lost at nine years old and that we'd been afraid Drusus would never even know. Octavia and Leo did cross paths, and he did shoot his shot, and my blessing got used after all. I still didn't care for money, but I started throwing it away in more useful ways. A theater program for kids like me, a conservation program for Maria's birthday, donations to Octavia's programs for battered women… actual good stuff. I got a happy ending. I wanted everyone else to share in it.

Oh, sad day. The ridiculously happy SYOT is done. It's gonna suck reading all the other CRs and seeing these people die. Anyway, here's one little happy story. There wasn't even any drama this time around. I was bracing for another world war, but nope, everyone got along really well. That'll probably never happen again, so this was a moment to witness. Also Maria has a whole personality and stuff written out for her, but this was already long, so I'm hoping to feature her somewhere in Moments. Until then, see you on my other account in my CR where people DO die.