'Shit, I should have just slit her throat the last time.' - was Luka's immediate reaction to the familiar white-haired woman. Luka sat in her favourite spot of the cafe - a semi-secluded corner near a round cheddar wood table, that offered a good view of the intersection. It made spying on random people easy. Still, she never expected her little hobby to give a whiff of the elusive Yowane Haku.
The latter wore a black trench coat, paired with baggy trousers and her brother's shabby army boots. Her silver hair was mostly tucked beneath a collar, as a measly disguise, regardless the beret with a red ribbon gave her identity away. That was Haku's prized possession. The beret used to belong to Eleanor, before Haku blew the poor woman's brains out. Now she floundered it, as if it were a trophy. That memory haunted Luka for several years now, at least she could hate Haku much easier for it. As Luka pondered on the loss of her gang's head strategist, Haku disappeared from view. That spurred the pink-haired woman to stand up. She left her nearly full cappuccino and threw on a grey coat.
'Haku will pay. I'll make sure of it this time.' Luka thought to herself, as she exited the cafe and stalked in the direction, Haku had gone. In the meantime her free hand slipped into her coat's inner pocket, where she usually held her late step-father's locket. Warm fingers were met with the cold steel of a pistol instead. Good thing, she took it after all.
The woman silently manoeuvred through a narrow and dingy alley, which had opened up to the side of the cafe. This pathway was encapsulated in layers of smog and reminded one of mashed ghosts, those lost in heedless shootouts between mobs. Death was common in places like this. It landed carelessly, spurred by guns, knives, and sometimes well-placed poison.
Finally, a familiar beret appeared.
'Found you.' Luka smirked. Her adrenaline rose further, once she saw Haku climb a flight of crooked stairs, then unlock the door on the second storey of an apartment block. Once the door slammed shut, Luka quickened her pace and simultaneously loaded two bullets into her gun. 'Apparently, I found where she resides as well. Two birds with one stone!'
The stairs creaked beneath her weight, as she climbed up to Haku's apartment. Luka doubted the walls of the place were any thicker than paper, so Haku probably expected company by now. With a hammering heart Luka leaned her back at a brick wall. She could faintly hear a kettle going off. This was probably a single room apartment then, not that Haku could afford anything fancy... Luka licked her dry lips. It was now or never. Holding the pistol near her chest, she sprung forth and opened the door.
She pointed the gun, ready to shoot. A knife pressed against her throat.
"And a warm welcome to you too, Luka." Haku droned out. She stood, pressed against the other woman. One of Haku's hands was holding the knife to Luka's throat, the other mobilized her arm and the gun, which was pointing way off. Luka's breath hitched.
"Cut the crap and end me already!"
"Why would I? I'd have no sparring partner then."
"Thought so." Luka scoffed. In the next moment Haku single-handedly wrenched the gun out of Luka's grasp. After it clattered to the floor, the silver-haired woman locked eyes with Luka. If she expected to see dismay or pleading, she'd be disappointed. Luka kept her expression neutral, her lips sealed. Even if she was on the losing side, Luka vowed to never back down or squirm in front of Haku, not again. The edge of the knife dug deeper into Luka's throat, heightening her heart rate. It was a sharpened one, alright. "You can put that toy away now."
"Choose your words, while you still can, darling." Haku stepped away, nonchalant. As if having forgotten her earlier intent, she waltzed towards the stove, languidly spinning her knife in the process. "Either way, it's funny of you to try and up me. Your aim is off and your reflexes suck." While she spoke, like a teacher would to a petulant child, Luka pocketed her pistol. "For shame, and I thought you learnt your lesson the last time, Luka."
"Yeah, well, it's been a couple of months, had to try my luck again." Luka smirked pitiably. This was foolish, alright, she had to give credit to Haku. The latter slowly quirked an eyebrow.
"Am I a lottery?"
"Don't waste your breath. It's not like I care that much about you." Only after saying that, did it click to Luka, how out of context that sounded. Alas, Haku seemed non-the-wiser. The woman idly poured hot water into two chipped cups over the stove. Both of Haku's hands were occupied, eyelids squinted - a side-effect of having a lazy eye. Her posture seemed both languid and concentrated at the same time. Her lower chapped lip was bitten, whilst lean muscles on her forearms remained tense, perfectly visible from underneath a faded white shirt. Her soft hair was meticulously pinned back into a ponytail, giving way to a pallid neck, which had been dotted with occasional pigmentations, like a series of constellations. Luka could recall mapping Haku's skin into countless Dippers, an occasional Cepheus, or Cassiopeia. Throughout it all the silver-haired woman balanced on the tips of her toes. The contrast felt unnatural. For a moment Luka considered Haku's concentration to be fabricated, such uncertainty made Luka's shoulders twitch. She was standing inside a lion's den. For all she knew, that tea could made from Oleander. The moment Luka took a step back, Haku's eyes slid towards her.
"Care for some tea?" The question sounded more like an order than a genuine enquiry. Luka cursed her damned luck.
"No."
"Come now! You barge into my house, intending to kill me, and leave just like that? Have some manners."
In the end, Luka begrudgingly sat down on a wooden chair across from Haku. Her posture was rigid with palms, resting deathly on her pressed knees. Separating the women was a coffee table, propped on old hardback books, while cigarette buds littered both the table and the caramel floor, like a mass of dead tics. Ash smears and cardboard boxes followed such accumulation. At least Haku provided them both with black tea – some hospitality, Luka thought.
"You look, as if you were sitting in a death row." Languidly, Haku took a sip from her cup and as if to lighten matters added. "Loosen up. I don't stab without a good reason."
The other woman snarled, clenching her fists.
"Yeah, as if you didn't mindlessly kill Eleanor and Yuuma."
"Your step-father had it coming." Haku countered, closing her eyes against Luka's temper. "Eleanor however... was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Poor girl..."
Unable to control herself, Luka stood up and grabbed Haku by the collar. The latter's body sagged, her head lolled to the side, vulnerable. Eyes became lidded, as if fearing punishment. Not a single gesture was genuine. Rather, Haku mimicked Luka's own vulnerability from their confrontation a few years ago. The silver-haired woman revived that shameful moment, birthed its corpse, exploiting Luka's shame, and threw it back at her face.
"You brute, I should have killed you, when I had the chance, and keep Yuuma out of your filthy mouth!"
"Hoo? He's seen a fair share of filthy mouths, if you know what I mean." Haku's fingers cradled Luka's wrist. How misplaced that gentleness felt. It was feathery light and simultaneously hid a dagger beneath an ivory sleeve. Haku continued softly. "I'm surprised he never taught you anything... But that's what you get for trusting a scumbag."
"Your guys trusted him too."
"Right up to a point, where I noticed he was a liar and a thief."
"Yuuma was just doing his job."
"To whom, darling? Not to you... Not to the Rusted Bones, or the Phoenix Association." Haku pulled Luka's hands off of herself. "He infiltrated many mobs and sold them out, before they had a chance to let out a squeak. What makes you think Rusted Bones would've been treated differently?" Once Haku reached for her cup, Luka took a hasty breath. Sensing an opposition, readied on Luka's tongue, Haku interjected. "Yuuma was a selfish fool."
"You didn't know him."
"I knew your step-father well enough, to know he was trouble. You should thank me, that I got rid of him."
"Thank you?! You're mad!"
"Not in the slightest..." Haku's lips curved into a devious smirk. Luka did not miss an odd glint inside of her eyes. Before she could guess its meaning, Haku grabbed Luka's arm. "You're just disillusioned."
The words chilled Luka, as they echoed in her ear long after being spoken. They drilled through her ear canal into deepest crevices of memory. Their velocity made her panic.
"You're trying to confuse me."
"No. When did I ever lie to you? Hmm?" Haku's soft tone cracked, as if she was wounded by the other's disbelief. Before long, the woman pulled Luka to sit sideways on her lap. The position felt awkward and unnatural. Luka sat hunched, propped on a single knee, as if she were a child. Her legs pushed against Haku's free shin, struggling to find space to either straighten them, or to retreat beneath herself, both options were prohibited. The other's warmth was more than welcome however. Before long Haku's fingers settled around Luka's waist and once the latter was secured, like a mouse in a cage, Haku smiled lovingly. "You're the only one, I can't lie to, Luka. Haven't I proven so before? You on the other hand, are a closed book."
"I don't open up to the enemy."
"Ah, right, the enemy! How simple it would be, if that was all-"
From an edge of her eye Luka noticed a timely smirk. Haku probably imagined hitting a jackpot with that line... In defence, Luka drowned out the other's haughty voice and instead lazily surveyed the apartment, so to pass the time. Her sight naturally landed on Haku's cleavage. Somehow, the skin looked lucidly white under the apartment's bleary lighting. One could barely attribute it to a living human being, more so it contrasted with a darkened scar. It travelled from Haku's collarbone down to her chest and to the side of her stomach. It must have been a new one. She resisted an urge to bury her face in Haku's soft chest, to lick and nibble at that healed wound, until it would open back up. Her teeth would bite and tear at the skin, ripping out Haku's muscle tissue, surrounding arteries and veins. She would bury herself amidst Haku's bones then, gorge herself on the other woman's insides, live off this craving like a parasite... If they'd become one in the process, past hardships, differences and arguments would become obsolete. All that'd remain, would be a faint feeling of fulfilment. Like a halo, it would hang above Luka's head.
"Are you listening to me?" Haku asked. Her fingers simultaneously ran along Luka's side, before methodically resettling their clasp at her waist, feigning, nothing had happened. In a sense, nothing did. The fuzzy tingles passed by in a dream like haze. After all, Haku wasn't capable of warmth or care. Her arms were rough, and blemished from neglect. They were programmed for hard edges of a knife and the cold steel of a gun. Of course, Luka recalled rumours of Haku having had a child at some point, alas the motherly care, she portrayed was a ploy - just another misleading gesture.
Saving face, Luka scoffed.
"You're such a bore, I dozed off."
"You seemed rather livid, eyeing my breasts."
"So? Are you gonna kick me out because of it? Slit my throat?" She taunted. "You wouldn't dare."
"I very well could... At least I don't miss my shots, like someone in this room."
"Ouch. You wound me." Luka rolled her eyes.
"It's the truth. I'm surprised, that you survived under the Rusted Bones for so long. They're as vicious as lions, I've heard, not to mention, that they feed snakes." A loop-sided smile rose to Haku's lips and Luka felt a cold chill pass through her backbone. It was just like Haku to rub Yuuma's death in. What made it worse, was the feeling of Yuuma's locket, resting inside her coat's pocket. What if Haku could sense its presence? In that case, her words were skilful spears. Luka felt her ears heat up in shame and anger at the thought of it. Inwardly, she pushed that possibility away. For five years that golden-dyed locket rested against her heart. It could have morphed into her body at this point. Maybe her heart actually beat for two or three? Deliriously, she prayed for the locket, which encapsulated her step-father and mother's photo, to be engraved inside of her like a seed. Luka would gladly sacrifice all her essence for it to coil further roots and stems. Wherever such withdrawal would leave her, was of no concern.
Haku slowly released her hold.
"If you're that loyal to them, darling, stop conversing with a rival. Go lick their feet like the mutt that you are."
"I..." Luka halted. Her mind quickly shut out Haku's words, and instead she ventured. "Can I stay the night?"
"Be my guest. You can take the shower first too."
At Haku's approval, a pesky avalanche was pushed off Luka's chest, rolling her shame and despair down to the pit of her stomach. Her shoulders relaxed. With a grateful nod, she stood up and left her coat on the back of the chair.
X X X
Nearly an hour had passed, before Luka exited the bathroom. One of Haku's violet towels was wrapped around her frame. Luka felt rejuvenated, though it was the after-effect of Haku's lavender shower gel, rather than the bath itself. She could barely contain her giddy smile at the thought of it all. Here she was waltzing inside Haku's apartment, marking every nook and cranny, leaving strands of hair in corners of the tub and Haku's comb, as silly little reminders of her immaculate presence. If only to get a fleck of Haku's attention... This way, Haku will have to recall Luka's face and name, press it against the corners of her lips, while she will meticulously dispose of the hair - maybe Haku will burn it for peace of mind too. Regardless of what she'll do, Luka's essence will remain. A wide smile finally broke free. She dreamed on.
'I'll cherish this moment: the soft towel, and scent of lavender, the jagged tiles beneath my feet - I'll remember it all. Perhaps she'll cherish me in return, if not now, maybe in days to come...'
Despite Luka's cheery mood, the main room appeared foreboding. Perhaps it was a trick of the evening sun or maybe the stuffiness of the apartment itself. She found Haku, sitting on the same chair. Fingers were occupied on her lap. What was even weirder, was that Luka's coat was reversed onto its inner side and her pistol sat prideful in the middle of the table, amongst ash smears, cigarette buds and cups of cold tea. Odd, how that thoughtless placement of the gun could have paid homage to a round of Russian roulette. Luka lowered her voice, fearful.
"What did you do?"
"Took care of some trash."
"Haku, what did you do?"
"I took care of your trash, darling." An exasperated sigh was emitted, as if it was a chore to repeat herself. Haku opened her palm to reveal Luka's locket. "It's not like anybody needs any reminders of Yuuma, right?"
Blood was drained from Luka's limbs, as if that implication physically wounded her. Her voice cracked.
"Give that back."
"It's unhealthy to obsess over the dead. Haven't you heard? As far as I've checked," she tapped at the locket. "None of these people are with us. Amen."
"Haku, I swear. If you won't give that back, I'll-"
"What? What will you do?" Without waiting for a response, Haku pushed the chair back and stood up. With slow measured steps, she walked passed Luka, as if the other didn't even exist, and started pacing around the room. The locket's chain periodically hit her shin, like an out of tune pendulum - probably worth less than that. She continued. "You're such a fool, darling... There's a gun next to you, shoot, if you see fit, but I doubt you'll get far. More than that, I wish you'd sort yourself out, before picking up a firearm in the future."
"What?" Luka snarled.
"For a strong body, you need a strong mind. That's where you lack. You are disillusioned, you're buried in the past." Haku smiled dryly, and opened the locket to peer inside. A derisive breath rolled out of her chest. "Ah, what a beautiful photo of the dead. How quaint! Do you wish to revive your family or go down with them at this point? Don't be a fool! If you bury your heart, you'll lose track of self, become an easy target. You can never avenge Eleanor and Yuuma like this..." She bit into the locket. "You'll never attain my respect either, darling."
Luka's eyes widened fearfully. She picked up the pistol and shoved it in Haku's direction. Her teeth were clenched, her heartbeat hammered in her ears.
"I swear, another word and I'll kill you..."
"Huh! Try! Kill me. Yowane Haku - the woman, you've obsessed over for five years!" She laughed hysterically. Arms splayed out to either side. Luka began to tremble and Haku continued with the shattered locket still trapped in-between her teeth. "Ah, just as I thought. You want to kiss me, you want to touch me, love me, bow down and worship me. What you won't and can't do, is kill me! Because then you'll have no one left!" Tears fell as mementos of Luka's fractured self. Her soul was ripped out. Haku laughed at such a pitiful sight. "See? I finally figured you out, darling!"
With her soul dismantled and rotting somewhere in the room, all that was left of Luka was instinct.
She pulled the trigger...
Night was approaching. An unbearable silence remained, meticulously sweeping away all evidence of life.
Beside the quiet, like needless affiliates, lay a dead woman and another, slumped against the wall, blank-faced and half-dead herself.
-X-X-X-
A/N: Funnily enough, I can feel Jean Genet's influence in this fic, huh, don't know how to feel about that. Then again, I've been reading his stuff lately - subconscious inspiration, yay.