The Sith Gamer

by GoodguysRoverated

A juvenile nihilist is reborn in Star Wars with a system that allows him to upgrade his abilities by earning points. Will he save the galaxy? Nope. He decides to treat the galaxy as his own personal playground, make a mess of the Clone Wars, troll the Republic, and be as annoying as possible to both the Jedi and Sidious. After all, if nothing matters, why not do whatever you want?

6. Welcome to the Jungle!

Chapter 6: Welcome to the Jungle! We got Ghosts and Games!

POV: Kazakin

I tapped my foot impatiently as Rook and I awaited my grandfather's arrival in docking bay number….. fuck it I didn't pay attention to the number. To be honest, I was the only one who was ACTUALLY waiting. Rook was slumped over my belongings and snoring. Rook had brought a duffel bag's worth of stuff, but she didn't have to bring all of her belongings because, unlike me, she isn't planning on leaving the academy.

Her loss.

Just as I was starting to consider using the Force to cause 'accidents' to happen to nearby engineers and pilots, the Gra'tua, that beautiful old bitch of a ship, finally arrived and made touchdown. The ramp descended and Krask started making his way out of the ship and over to us accompanied by a woman in red armor who I knew from prior encounters was Rook's mother, Veraslyn Kast.

"Wake up, you little shit," I said as started kicking the lockbox Rook had draped herself over. "Our aliit are here."

"Oh. Cool," Rook mumbled groggily as she dragged herself to her feet and at least tried to look like she was paying attention. "Hi Forgemaster Ordo. Hi mom."

"Good to see you bu'ad," Kask nodded towards me before raising an eyebrow at Rook. "You as well Kast'ika."

"Stand up straight ad," Veraslyn frowned and grabbed Rook by the ears and forced her to stand up straight. "Unlike the soft and feeble dar'manda of Sundari, you are a true Mando'ade. Act like it."

"Owowowowow! Okay! Okay! I'm awake now!"

….. Rook's mom is kind of a bitch.

"We're ready to go, ba'buir," I informed Kast, doing my best to ignore Rook and her mother's shenanigans. This was normal for them.

"So, I see," he sent a glance towards my lockbox before directing his attention back to me, particularly my yellow eyes which I no longer bothered to hide. "Grab your stuff. We'll talk onboard."

After marching aboard the ship (dragged by her ear in Rook's case) and grabbing our seats in the cockpit, my grandfather started absentmindedly going over the pre-flight checks while we talked.

"I received a transmission last night from the headmaster," Kask began, gracefully ignoring the women of Clan Kast who were still arguing in the seats behind us. "He informed me of your incident with the bounty hunters. So, the secret's out then?"

"Seems like it."

"Hmm….. I suppose you're not intending on returning to the academy and graduating after your Verd'goten."

"Hell no."

"Fine. I'll fill out the paperwork while you and Rook complete your trial," Kask sighed as he finished his preparations and started up the engines. "I'm disappointed you're not going to finish your education, but I suppose you'll have plenty to keep you busy with all this dar'jetii sorcery once you've completed your Verd'goten."

"Speaking of which, where is our trial going to take place?" I inquired, leaning further back into my seat as the Gra'tua went airborne.

"Veraslyn and I selected a planet not too far from here called Yavin 4," he replied. "Plenty of dense jungles and old ruins to hunt in. It was also home to those Massassi warriors who fought for Exar Kun in the Great Sith War, so you might find something useful there."

"Hot damn, you know how to pick e'm ba'buir," I smirked. If I could get my hands on anything that belonged to Exar Kun it would be very useful to me. Best case scenario: I get something I can use to augment my Sith powers. Worst case scenario: I find some old ass artifact and sell it to a museum. Either way I profit. "So, what weapons will Rook and I have?"

"About that," Kask smirked before reaching into his utility belt and removing something before tossing it into my lap: the crossguard lightsaber I'd retrieved on Malachor.

"How did you find this?" I asked as I clipped it to my own utility belt. "I buried this in a lockbox under my prefab."

"You weren't as sneaky as you thought you were when you buried the damn thing," the old man seemed rather pleased with himself. "I dug it up a few days after you left and stored it in my forge."

"Oh," I was kind of embarrassed to be honest. I really thought I'd kept it a secret. Oh well, it's good to have the iconic weapon of this universe back in my possession. It was a shame that I wasn't able to bring it with me here to the academy. "Well, thanks ba'buir."

I don't know what you're talking about, partner. You could've just stored it in your inventory.

… My what?

Your inventory, remember? You unlocked it when you completed the Malachor quest? You know, the Sith Temple?

….

Did you forget? Hmm…. I guess you were kinda distracted by unlocking Sith Alchemy at the time.

WHY DIDN'T YOU REMIND ME!?

I don't remember you asking.

---

FLASHBACK

Good thing, too. How am I supposed to get a sexy twi'lek woman if I look like I spent my summer vacation at Auschwitz?

I feel like that joke was in bad taste, partner.

I don't remember asking, Oz.

END FLASHBACK

---

… Did you just hold a grudge?

Maybe.

You petty little bitch. I'm so proud of you.

Aw shucks, partner. You're gonna make me blush. Still friends?

Still friends.

Yeehaw!

"Hey Kaz!" Rook called out after having finally escaped the clutches of her mother. "Do you want head downstairs and play dejarik? No nerds for us to beat this time!"

"Dejarik. My old enemy," I said solemnly. "We meet again."

---

POV: 3rd Person

Satine watched from her chamber's balcony with conflicting emotions as the ship ferried that troublemaker Kazakin Ordo out of Sundari, hopefully for the last time. On the one hand, she was pleased he would not cause further disruptions for the New Mandalorian Way. On the other hand, she would no longer be able to keep an eye on him and he was now more or less free to do whatever he wished. Who knew what kind of chaos a follower of the old ways could unleash? Especially one with such powers.

Satine breathed deeply to calm herself. She was not a tyrant. She would not force her views on those who would not accept them. She would certainly encourage them to leave Mandalore so they wouldn't taint the future she was building, but she wouldn't force it upon them.

But with that said, Kazakin's abilities and loyalty to the True Mandalorians had become public knowledge almost overnight. Many had been reminded of the reign of Tarre Vizsla, Mandalore the Jedi, and had started drawing comparisons between the two. Several within her cabinet had said that the boy represented ideas that were dangerous to the New Mandalorian Way. Marquis Shav Krytyg had actually suggested that they have the boy killed, but Satine wouldn't hear another word of it. They were pacifists, not dictators.

Still, someone should keep an eye on the young man. But she and the New Mandalorians weren't qualified to handle him with his Force abilities. As things stood, there was only one person she could think to reach out to for advice.

"You know, if you had asked it of him, Obi-Wan Kenobi would have left the Jedi Order to be with you."

Pushing the boy's comments out of her mind, she activated her holocall and waited anxiously for her transmission to be received by the Jedi Temple.

She didn't have to wait long.

"Well, if it isn't my favorite duchess," the hologram of Obi-Wan Kenobi quipped in greeting with a wide smile. "It's good to see you again Satine."

"Always a pleasure, Padawan Kenobi," Satine said neutrally, doing her best to keep a smile off her face. Idly, she noticed that he had somehow become even more handsome. Damn him and his stupid handsome face. "As much as I'd love to catch up, I've called you because I am in need of your counsel."

"You know, if you had asked it of him, Obi-Wan Kenobi would have left the Jedi Order to be with you."

Satine nearly growled as that memory burst unbidden into her mind once again. She couldn't afford to think about what could've been. Not now. She had to focus.

"Whatever you need, Satine," Obi-Wan spoke up, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"I recently had a young man attending the Royal Military Academy. He displayed unusual abilities similar to the Force you and your Jedi wield," Satine reported.

"How old is he?"

"He turned thirteen earlier today."

"Well, he's far too old to be trained at the Jedi Temple then. Have there been any incidents at the academy? It's not uncommon for an untrained Force sensitive to cause accidents since they haven't been taught to properly commune with the Force."

"Oh, he's caused plenty of havoc," Satine scoffed. "None of it was accidental, however. He crippled two men and tortured another with some kind of lightning."

"Lightning, you say?" a look of alarm appeared on Obi-Wan's face.

"Yes. It was quite odd," Satine added. "Up until that point his eyes had been white, as is typical of the Echani. But after that incident his eyes were yellow."

"By the Force," if the padawan was alarmed before, now he looked outright panicked. "Satine, what is the boy's name?"

"Kazakin," Satine replied, slightly taken aback by her old flame's urgency. "Kazakin Ordo."

---

Across the galaxy, in the heart of the Jedi Temple, a teenage Jedi had broken out into a cold sweat. 'Kazakin Ordo.' The name, the Force abilities, even the Echani heritage all matched with what Master Qui-Gon had heard from Master Dooku. Master Baltrann and the Dark Woman had found no trace of the Sith's young minion after he'd seemingly disappeared into the depths of Hutt Space. Could it really be possible that this boy was not only a Sith himself but was also hiding under their noses this entire time on a Republic world? Even more ludicrous, he'd been attending SCHOOL of all things?

"I'll have to call you back, Satine," Obi-Wan sputtered, idly realizing that he'd been hyperventilating just a bit. There is no emotion. There is no emotion. There is no emotion.

"Obi-Wan? Are you alright?" Satine inquired; her neutral façade broken in the face of his panic. It would be a lot easier to have no emotion if she would stop staring at him like that. By the Force she'd grown beautiful.

"What you've told me is a lot more serious than I thought," he replied, reigning in his emotions with practiced ease. "If you'll excuse me, I need to speak with my masters. I'll explain later."

He didn't wait to hear her reply before he turned around and darted out of the room. The Young padawan raced through the halls of the Jedi Temple trying to make his way to the Jedi Council Chamber as quickly as he could.

Many other Jedi gave him odd glances as he passed them by with a few Knights and masters calling out to him, wondering why he was in such a hurry or perhaps to demand that he slow down. Obi-Wan didn't pay them any mind. He needed to report to the Jedi Council. He needed to….

"In a hurry are you, Padawan Kenobi?" Obi-Wan came to a screeching halt at the sound of the Grandmaster's voice. The panting padawan turned to look at the ancient Jedi who was regarding him a raised eyebrow and a bemused look.

"Apologies, Master Yoda," Obi-Wan said as he recomposed himself. "I was coming to let the Council know of about some important information I have just gathered."

"Well, here I am," Yoda smiled. "Enlighten me, will you not?"

"Yes, master. I've just received word from the Duchess Satine of Mandalore that the boy we've been looking for, Kazakin, was attending the Royal Military Academy in Sundari," Obi-Wan reported.

"Right you were, to bring this to the Council's attention," Yoda remarked, his smile replaced by a focused and stony gaze. "Alert the others, we must."

"There's another thing, master," Obi-Wan spoke up, stopping the diminutive Jedi in his tracks. "The Duchess reports that the boy now has yellow eyes and can shoot Sith Lightning from his hands. It seems his connection to the Sith goes deeper than we thought."

"If true, what you say is, then not a Sith servant do we seek but a Sith Apprentice," Yoda mused. "Send you and Master Jinn along with Masters Baltraan and Kuro to investigate, we will. Speak with the Duchess, you and your master will while the others inspect the academy. Shine a light into this darkness we must."

"As you say, Master Yoda."

"One more thing padawan. Speaking with the Duchess from in the communications room, were you not?"

"Of course," Obi-Wan replied with a raised eyebrow.

"Why not contact the Council using the terminal? Cross your mind, did it not?" a sly grin crept unto the ancient Jedi's face.

"…" Obi-Wan was silent for a few moments before he facepalmed. "Apologies master, I suppose I didn't really think that through."

"Young, you are. Happens, these things do."

---

POV: Kazakin

At last. My ultimate triumph was at hand. I could see the resignation in my enemy's eyes as I sealed their fate. No longer would I be enslaved to the dark whims of this THING! No longer would I live in fear! No longer would I-

"For kriff's sake Kaz, we both know you've won," Rook sneered with her arms crossed. "Just make your move and wipe that smirk off your face."

I was referring to the fact that I'd finally won a game of dejarik.

"Haha! In your face, Rook!" I declared gloatingly as my holographic Acklay landed the finishing blow on her Rancor.

"Congratulations, you dumb sleemo. You finally won," Rook smirked. "It only took you three years and the absence of the nerds who are actually good at this game."

"First of all: fuck you, Rook. Second of all: this game is still bullshit rigged and you know it. And third of all: fuck you, Rook," I grumbled much to my friend's amusement, my sense of victory dissipating with every word that came out her mouth.

"You're just mad that you suck at this game," Rook shrugged, that smug grin still present on her face.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go fuck yourself," I said as I flipped her off.

"Get over here and fuck me yourself, you coward," Rook continued to smirk as she flipped me off in return.

"…. What?" to be honest, it took me a minute to process what she just said. Was that an offer? I'm hoping she's joking because this is getting kinda weird, even by my nearly non-existent standards. Then again, after we're done with the Verd'goten we'll be recognized as adults by Mandalorian culture. It's still kinda weird though.

"Ord'ika, Kast'ika," Veraslyn poked her head into the lounge calling for us. "We'll be landing on Yavin 4 shortly. Grab your gear and meet with us at the entrance."

But I was winning…..

"Finally! The hunt begins!" Rook cheered as she got up and bounded out of the room.

Well, might as well get this show on the road.

A few minutes later, the Gra'tua had landed on Yavin 4 and the four of us assembled in front of the ship. Rook and I were equipped with basic survival ranging from flasks and rations to blaster rifles and vibroknives. I also had my lightsaber hidden on my person, but the only one who knew about that was the old man. It seems that even in warrior cultures nepotism is still a thing. Which is terrible, except for when it benefits me.

Who? Me? A hypocrite? I don't know what could've given you that idea.

"Listen up, ade," my grandfather began, addressing both myself and the violent little gremlin standing next to me, allegedly known as Rook. "This is it: your Verd'goten. Complete your trial and become a full-fledged Mandalorian. Do not bring shame upon your families by failing and do not dishonor them by bringing back the corpse of something that wasn't a threat to you."

"You have each been handed a locator beacon," Veraslyn spoke up. "These beacons will allow us to keep track of you. If you are injured and need to withdraw from the Verd'goten, then activate it and we will come and retrieve you. Otherwise, the only reason you should use it is if the corpse of whatever beast you slay is too large for you to bring back on your own in which case we will come retrieve you and your prey. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am!"

"We don't want either of you aiding the other, so you will be split up. Kazakin will head east while my daughter will go west. That is all. Get moving!"

I didn't need any further motivation. I was racing off into the jungle before she'd even finished saying the word 'moving.' Yavin was covered in ancient stone temples that were built by the ancient Massassi to honor their original master, Naga Sadow. I could sense a dark presence emanating from the one closest to me. Now, obviously I could ignore it, go find something to kill, and go about my day…. But that would be boring.

Is this completely unnecessary?

Yes.

Is this probably a bad idea?

Yes.

Am I going to do it anyway?

Yes.

---

Quest added: Last Battle of the Great Sith War

Explore the Temple of Woolamander.

Rewards: 100,000 points.

Bonus points will be awarded upon completion based on feats preformed during the course of the quest.

Failure: Indeterminant

---

Okay, NOW it's absolutely necessary!

And so, with Force Speed to quicken my pace, I set off for the big ominous temple in the distance. But as I raced through the jungle swinging from trees and vines like I was motherfucking Tarzan, I couldn't help but wonder: What were the odds my grandfather would land the ship so close to this dark presence out of literally anywhere else on the planet.

Also, spoilers Oz! Just from the name of the quest I can tell that it has something to do with Exar Kun!

Hey, I just generate the quests, partner. I don't name e'm.

Then who does?

I don't know. George Lucas, I suppose? I mean, he did create Star Wars after all.

Wait a minute…. Are you telling me that George Lucas has ascended to Godhood and is influencing the galaxy!?

What in tarnation? No! I only brought up George as a joke!

I knew it! George put this challenge before me to try make my Darkside using ass go through some character development! He's making me the protagonist of a spin-off story in the EU (or a bad fanfiction), convince me to turn to the light, and go through a stupid redemption arc! I'll never turn to the light! NEVER! The light side is celibate and boring! I WANT A HAREM OF TWI'LEK BITCHES!

….. I don't even know what to say to that. Are you messing with me?

Mostly.

---

POV: 3rd Person

Plagueis was beyond pleased as he entered the lodgings he'd been provided with for his stay on Mandalore. The boy was a diamond in the rough, far more than he ever dreamed he would be. He'd made far more progress than the Dark Lord thought he would've given the apparent lack of actual training his master was imparting upon him. If what the boy said was true, then this Vader was a fool for overlooking him. Plagueis wouldn't make that mistake.

He continued to muse on potential uses for the boy as he activated his holoterminal to contact his apprentice. He didn't have to wait long.

"What is thy bidding, my master?" the holographic form of Darth Sidious bowed in greeting.

"Rise, my apprentice," Plagueis droned with a wave of his hand. "I have made contact with our young Mandalorian friend from Nar Shadda."

"Excellent. Was the boy of any use to us?" Sidious perked up.

"Indeed," the Dark Lord smirked under his mask. "Kazakin Ordo, also known as Darth Krul, is a Sith apprentice to an individual known as Darth Vader. He will be a great asset in bringing the Grand Plan to fruition."

"Oh really? Please, do tell…."

"The methods this other Sith Dynasty, the Order of Traya, have a more cutthroat approach to how the master selects their apprentice. However, it seems Lord Vader is unhappy with the results of the trials he put forward," Plagueis informed his apprentice. "In short, the young man does not have his master's favor and is mostly self-taught. He's made remarkable progress for one who has been so hindered. I have set up a means of communication with young Kazakin. He will come to me for the knowledge and advice his mentor is refusing to give him…."

"And in doing so, draw him into the fold," Sidious nodded. "However, my master, if the boy has as much potential as you say, is there not the possibility that he may become a rival and betray us?"

"He is a Sith," Plagueis chuckled. "If such a thing were to happen, then that's just nature taking its course. Should he attempt to do so, we will strike him down. The Grand Plan will not be sabotaged by Traya's dynasty be it unintended or purposely."

"As you say, my master."

He and Sidious continued to exchange information for the next half an hour or so, some political intrigue here or an opportunity there, but Plagueis's mind remained on the unusual young Sith he'd encountered. His abnormalities weren't just confined to his circumstances or the fact that he was from another Sith Dynasty. His connection to the Force was the source of no small amount of intrigue to the Dark Lord's scientific mind. So, Plagueis only partially paid attention to his conversation with Sidious, his mouth working on autopilot while his mind puzzled away at the enigma that was Darth Krul.

The boy was a deadzone in the Force which was typically only brought about by a Wound in the Force, a phenomenon that, although it was not unheard of, was exceedingly rare. For a Wound in the Force to be a person was even rarer. The most notable examples in recorded history would be the Jedi Exile Meetra Surik and Darth Nihilus.

Even beyond being a Wound, his connection to the Force was unnatural. Plagueis had been able to sense the young Sith when he started actively using the Force. During the incident he'd used Force Lightning on the Rodian when the tournament was interrupted, Plagueis had sensed the Dark Side coalesce around the boy. The dark taint had been easily noticeable, but there was something different about it compared to when Plaguies or his apprentice used Force Lightning. It was as if it was being drawn upon artificially and there had been, dare he say it, pushback from the Force.

Sure, when Sith bent the Force to their will the Force was obviously unwilling to obey. But the Force seemed particularly averse to being used by Krul. It was as if it took issue with him being able to wield the Force in the first place which made absolutely NO sense because that's simply determined midichlorian count at birth! To make the situation even stranger, the boy didn't even seem to notice the Force's resistance and dominated it with such ease that he might not have even noticed its resistance. This brought the Sith scientist back to his previous observations: Krul's seemingly effortless dominance over the Force felt artificial, practically mechanical.

For some reason, it reminded Plagueis of some the hologames Demask Holdings invested in to sell to children in the Core Worlds. With the press of a button, the player's avatar would execute some complicated maneuver or feat of superhuman strength with practically no effort on the part of the child playing the game. The absurdity of this line of thought made the Dark Lord shake his head in exasperation at himself. Where was he even going with this?

"Master?"

"Apologies, my apprentice," Plagueis rasped through his mask as he refocused on the conversation. He could indulge in his scientific curiosity later. "I was lost in thought. As you were saying?"

"Of course. I've managed to convince Nute Gunray that with my aid, he may one day become the Viceroy of the Trade Federation. Now we can begin covertly removing his competition so that he can rise through the ranks…."

---

POV: Kazakin

Yavin 4 really is great place to have a safari adventure.

Turn head to avoid claws. Retaliate. Decapitation. Keep moving.

10 points for killing an enemy

Lush jungles, beautiful scenery, and historical sites for sightseeing. I'm not exactly a history buff, but even I think it would be cool to explore ancient temples.

Jump onto back to avoid fangs. Bisection. Keep moving.

10 points for killing an enemy

There are also large bodies of water if you want to go fishing or sailing. Although to be honest, I don't actually know if there are any fish in there.

Enemy pouncing from foliage. Roll to the side. Cut throat. Keep moving.

10 points for killing an enemy

However, this place does have it downsides….

Have arrived at Yavin Temple. Enemy's chest inflating. About to howl. Wait for mouth to open. Wait. Wait. Now. Force Lighting directly down the throat. Keep moving.

10 points for killing an enemy

The wildlife for instance. Specifically, ALL THE DAMN HOWLERS THAT KEEP GETTING IN MY WAY.

"Fuck off, you overgrown lizards!" I roared, allowing to imbue my voice so that my shouting doubled as a Force Scream. The sonic burst that ripped from my throat as a result sent the closest Howler flying and the rest screeched in pain before scurrying off. "Finally."

On the bright side, killing these things on my way to the temple did bump me up to 332,330 points. I'm still not sure what I'm going to spend these points on, but I like having them in reserve if I ever need to pull magical solution out of my ass.

I regarded the massive Yavin Temple I'd fought my way towards for the past hour and finally made my way inside through the dimly lit stone corridors. Honestly, I could just drag one of those Howler's head back to my grandad and that would be the end of my Verd'goten , but I also really wanted to explore these ancient Sith temples. Besides, unlike me, Rook is probably being slow and sneaky as to not attract whole packs of Howlers like I did.

Wait….. doesn't that mean that all that annoying shit I just dealt with was my own damn fault?

You're your own worst enemy, partner.

I really am.

As I made my way through the temple, I got more and more bored. Thus far I had failed to find anything valuable or even remotely interesting. No hidden treasure, no ancient relics, not even an ancient Massassi to give me a jump scare. Nothing. The most entertainment I had was using my lightsaber to carve the words 'KRUL WAZ HERE' and a smiley face onto an ancient stone wall, destroying some of the ancient writing that was chiseled on it in the process. The building itself was still structurally sound and solid enough that with a bit of modernization and the right equipment it could make for a pretty decent base similar to what the Rebel Alliance did in the Original Trilogy.

Hmm…. Something for future me to think about.

Yes. A mighty fortress from which you may make this moon your domain. Dominate the system, build an army, bring the Jedi to their knees!

…. Those weren't my thoughts.

Oz? You're not trying out a new voice, are you?

No siree.

Then that means we got another Force-wielding asshole who doesn't know how to mind his own damn business. I've already had my fill of that shit with Plagueis.

Ignoring the voices in my head, except for Ozzy because he is a good boy, I continued into the depths of the temple and eventually found some kind of glowing golden globe thingy. I really had no idea what the hell I was looking at. Lying down next to the sphere was some kind of white… Rabbit? Fox? Cat? Whatever. Some kind of furry animal. Anyway, I approached the globe and examined it closely. I'm not quite sure what I was looking for, but it was easily the most interesting thing I'd seen all day.

Don't you DARE touch that!

... There was only one thing to do….

"Touch," I monotoned as I poked the globe a single time. I felt the sensation of darkness brushing up against my own darkness, but that was all.

DO YOU THINK YOU'RE FUNNY YOU LITTLE INSECT!? I DEMAND YOU GET AWAY FROM THAT!

"Don't tell me what to do!" I exclaimed as I began rapidly poking the globe. "Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch! Touch!"

"You know you look rather insane when you start screaming in response to something no one else can hear, yes?" a high-pitched, but not annoyingly so, voice inquired from near my foot. I ceased my poking and looked down to see the furry creature from before staring up at me with bright green eyes that bore uncomfortably into my own. "Hello."

"Uh….. Hi?"

"….."

"….."

"….."

"Okay, this awkward. Uh, who the fuck are you?"

"Ah! My apologies, young one. I am Jedi Master Ikrit. Based off the facts that you were not repelled by the Golden Globe as I was the first time I touched it and your yellow eyes; I think it is safe for me assume that you are an adherent of the Dark Side of the Force. Specifically, you are a Sith. Yes?"

A JEDI MASTER!? I didn't struggle with that Knight back on Malachor, but he wasn't exactly a duelist. I am by no means ready to confront a Jedi Master even if it is some random one I've never heard of before. Quick! Think of something clever to say!

"…. No."

Nailed it.

"….. You didn't actually expect me to believe that, did you?" the diminutive Jedi tilted his head adorably.

Damn it.

"Hey, I could've gotten lucky and bumped into a Jedi who's actually an idiot. You never know," I countered, crossing my arms.

"Hmm…. Perhaps. Regardless, I am pleased to meet you…. I'm sorry. You still haven't introduced yourself."

Have I mentioned that this creature, Jedi or not, is extremely cute? If not, I definitely should've by now. I also want to keep him as a pet.

"I am Darth Krul. Fear me," I introduced myself in the most deadpan voice I could muster.

"A pleasure, young Krul," the furry ball of cuteness greeted with a twitch of his ear. "I am quite pleased to meet someone after all this time, even if that person is a Darksider. To be honest, I'm not exactly sure how long I've been down here. I've been in a meditative trance, you see. Is Master Yoda still among the living?"

"He is," I replied cautiously. I was starting to get a little weirded out by this guy. "You're awfully polite for a Jedi speaking with a Sith."

"Well, there's no reason not to be civilized, is there?" Ikrit shrugged. "The only other person I've been able to converse with is the insane ghost of the Exar Kun. His idea of conversation is mostly threats and attempting to lure me to the Dark Side. It gets rather dull and repetitive after a while."

Exar Kun? The Sith who ravaged the Republic before the age of Revan? I thought he was just regular dead. I had no idea that his spirit inhabited the ancient Sith temples of Yavin 4. I know he died here, but I thought that was the end of his story. While I had been an avid consumer of Star Wars media in my previous life, I hadn't read or watched anything regarding the ancient Sith Lord and only knew bits and pieces of information regarding his role in causing the Great Sith War. If he had appeared at any time during the Clone Wars, Galactic Civil War, Jedi Civil War, or the Great Galactic War then I must've missed it.

"Well, if that's not a good reason for me to get the hell out of here. I don't know what is," I declared as I spun around to start making my way out of the temple.

You're smarter than you look, boy.

"Now wait just a moment!" Ikrit hopped onto my shoulder before I had even taken a single step and used one of his fluffy paws to force me to look at him. "The Force has brought us together for a reason, young man. I need your help."

"Why would I help you?" I snarled. "You're a Jedi and I'm a Sith, in case you forgot."

"I most certainly did not forget. Having opposing views on the Force doesn't mean we can't cooperate. Some of my fellow Jedi may disagree with me, but there's plenty of room in this galaxy for different sects of Force adherents to coexist," Ikrit brushed aside my concerns. "Additionally, it NEEDS to be you, or at least someone like you, to help me. Trapped within the Golden Globe are the souls of Massassi children that Exar Kun is draining in order to fuel his powers for his eventual return. Only a Force sensitive child is able to breach the Sith magic protecting the globe and free them! I was unable to free them, so I entered a hibernation trance to await one who could assist me. And by the Will of the Force, here you are!"

"You really think I was guided here to help you?" I won't lie, I was VERY skeptical about this.

"Of course," Ikrit remarked cheerfully. "Not only are you a Force sensitive child, but since you are attuned to the Dark Side, the globe's defenses don't register you as a threat! No doubt a contingency set in place by Exar Kun millennia ago for when he plans to eventually claim a new body to inhabit."

"Yeah, that's great and all, but why the hell should I care?" I did my best not to be distracted by how strong my urge to pet him was. Really, why should I care about these kids who are already fucking dead -scratch that- why should I care about literally anyone in the galaxy? They're all fictional characters anyway. They aren't real and their lives don't matter. I'm the only real person in the galaxy as far as I'm aware, therefore: I'm LITERALLY the only person in the universe who matters. Besides, the quest said that I just had to explore the temple. It didn't say anything about getting involved in this nonsense.

Blowing up a planet? Fine.

Causing chaos? Fun.

Going places no sane person would ever tread? Sure.

Ghosts? I don't fuck with ghosts. This is how shit like The Conjuring and Paranormal Activity happens. If I get a house that turns out to be haunted, I'm getting the fuck out of there and moving!

"How about this: If you help me free the souls of the Massassi children, I won't do my duty as a Jedi and drag you back to the Jedi Temple to stand before the Council. How's that sound?" a good deal snark was starting to enter the Jedi's tone. I guess he's done playing nice.

"What!? You don't even have a lightsaber to fight me with!" I exclaimed as he hopped off of me and took an unfamiliar stance a few feet away from me. Damn, he was quick. "Besides, your short as hell! Can you even fight?"

"Judge me by my size, do you?" he seemed to smirk as my thumb hovered over the activation switch for my lightsaber.

….. Fuck, he just pulled a Yoda quote on me.

On the one hand, I could use Force Phase to teleport out of here and this would no longer be my problem. On the other hand, I bet that helping Ikrit with this whole thing would count towards the bonus points for the Last Battle of the Great Sith War quest. Additionally, the longer I can go without anyone knowing about my ability to teleport, the easier it will be to escape if I'm ever in an emergency. Best to keep that trump card hidden for now.

"Fiiiiiiine. I'll help. But I want to keep you as a pet when we're done."

"Absolutely not. In fact, for that remark, I will also demand that you bring me aboard whatever ship brought you here and drop me off in Republic space."

"… I accept on the condition that I get to pet you like a space dog."

"….. I don't know what a space dog is, but I will agree to your very strange condition," Ikrit seemed perplexed by my demand, but he agreed and relaxed his stance. "We should get started immediately. The spirit of Exar Kun has no doubt been listening in on us and will move to interfere. With your attunement to the Dark Side, you can bypass the barrier's defenses, enter the Golden Globe, and destroy it from within using the Force. I will hold him off while you release the souls trapped within."

"VERMIN!"

….. That wasn't in my head.

"He's here," Ikrit muttered darkly as we both turned our heads towards the darkest corner of the room. To my senses it was as if the Dark Side of the Force had begun to physically manifest as the shadows from all over the room seemed to merge and coalesce into a single being, physically present and yet ethereal. The silhouette took the shape of a gaunt man in wispy robes, glowing red eyes, long hair just as inky black as the rest of his body held in a ponytail, and a glowing red mark on his forehead.

"I am here, and I am not amused," the ghost hissed as it raised its hand and fired Force Lightning at us. Ikrit, proving that he was right in that I should not judge him by his size, sprang into action and began absorbing the potent energies of Exar's attack with Tutaminis. Exar pressed the attack for a few more seconds before ceasing his use of Force Lightning and lunging at the small Jedi with gnarled, clawlike palm.

"You will not best me, monster!" Ikrit declared as he used Force Light, becoming a shining beacon within the darkness. The burst of light in close proximity to Exar caused his form to deteriorate into a shadowy mist that was forced to the opposite side of the room where it reformed into his gaunt visage with a snarl. "Move swiftly, young Krul! The Force may be our ally, but time is not!"

Without bothering to respond, I turned back to the globe, placed my palm on the globe, and prepared to enter it. There was just one problem….. how do I enter it? OH! I know!

Oz, deactivate Gamer's Mind. I'm going in.

I'm with ya, partner!

The mental software that kept the hardware known as my brain under control was deactivated. I felt the Force in its entirety screaming as if my presence in it was afront to the galaxy, but I ignored it. I pushed myself, both physically and in the metaphysical sense, into the globe with little difficulty.

I was swiftly submerged into the globe and found myself floating in…. honestly I don't know how to even begin to explain this trippy shit. It's like I'm inside the world's biggest hourglass but instead of the sand falling just floating in spirals. I'm also hearing a lot of voices whispering to me. I can't make out what they're saying but it's probably for the best that I don't listen to them anyway.

Welp, I'm in. Now what? Hmm…. Ikrit said I needed to destroy the globe from the inside, but how? Eh, no need to overcomplicate this. I'll just go with using excessive violence, it's worked out me so far. I started firing off concentrated blasts of Force energy in every direction. Up and down, left and right, forwards and backwards. Again and again, I blasted away. With each blast, the whisperings that surrounded me became louder and louder.

Up. Left. Down. Again.

"F- -."

Right. Center. Up. Again.

"Fr- -s."

Down. Up. Up. Again. Harder.

"Fr- us."

Back! Left! Right! Again!

"Free us."

All sides! Force Repulse! Force Repulse! Force Repulse!

"Free us!"

Force Repulse! Force Repulse! Force Repulse!

"FREE US!"

These voices are starting to give me a headache.

Force Repulse! Force Repulse! Force Repulse!

"FREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUSFREEUS!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I bellowed as I finished my micro-rampage off with the most powerful Force Repulse I could muster. As if it had been waiting for me to lose my temper, my surroundings shattered, and I found myself back in the temple as the globe disintegrated into sand for some reason. I looked to my left to see that Ikrit and Exar had paused in their duel for Force supremacy to stare at me, so I decided to wave at them. "Hi guys! I'm back!"

1000 alignment for saving the souls of the Massassi children

Alignment: -13,225 (Dark 2)

What? Ew, no. I don't want that! Get rid of that! Return my precious Dark Side corruption to me!

"Well done, young Krul!" Ikrit was quite pleased.

"How dare you," Exar sneered, seemingly not as pleased. "Assist me in erasing this Jedi scum from existence and I MIGHT allow you to live on as my new apprentice. After all, we are both Sith. Should we not unite in the face of our ancient ene-"

I REALLY hate being told what to do.

I interrupted him by hawking up a loogie and using the Force to send it flying at him. It unsurprisingly went through him seeing as he was still a ghost, but I think he understood the intent since his eyes began burning so brightly it was as if they had erupted into red flames.

"You will have no tongue with which to beg for mercy. You will have no eyes with which to weep," Exar hissed. "By the time I am done with you, death will be a mercy."

"Cool story bro," was my elegant response as I unleashed a barrage of Force Lightning at him. It worked on Obi-Wan's ghost in the Force Unleashed DLC so I see no reason it wouldn't work here. Based off of the roar of pain and fury that came from Exar as a result, I'm gonna go ahead and say my hunch was accurate.

"DIE WRETCH!" the spirit roared as he retaliated with his own Force Lightning colliding with mine midair, resulting in a Force Lightning clash. "I WILL DEVOUR YOUR SOUL AND YOUR EMPTY HUSK WILL BE MY NEW VESSEL!"

"Damn bro, you've got some REAL anger management issues!" I shouted as I brought both my hands together, intensifying the lightning and, more importantly, keeping his attention on me instead of on Ikrit who was sneaking up behind the ancient Sith. "You should try playing video games! It does wonders for my stress levels! Hell, I'm playing one right now, technically!"

"What are you blathering abou-" Exar was confused by my words for barely a moment before his rage returned and he mirrored my actions and brought his hands together to push more power into his lightning. "By the Force, WILL YOU CEASE YOUR INANE PRATTLING AND JUST DIE QUIETLY!?"

"What!? I can't hear you over the lightning!" I jeered. "Try using sign language!"

Exar looked like he was about to yell at me some more when Ikirt pounced onto the back of his head, his catlike claws digging into Exar's shadowy not-quite corporeal flesh, and suddenly began to glow with a golden light. It took me a moment to realize that the little Jedi was using Force Light again, a technique that specializes in purging Darkside manifestations and disrupting a darksider's connection to the Force. And now, with Ikrit latched onto Exar's head like a coked-up spider monkey, the Star Wars equivalent of an exorcism was performed on the undead asshole. With a final shriek of pain and fury, the ghost of Exar Kun dissipated like a fart in the wind.

"Nice tag team, fuzzball," I said as Ikrit approached looking awfully pleased with himself. If the words 'smug furball' were in a dictionary, his picture would probably be right next to them.

"You handled yourself quite well, my young Sith friend. Now, I believe you owe me a ride off this…. planet, "Ikrit replied, hesitating at what to call this hellhole as he'd prefer not to use coarse language. "While I love jungles and ancient temples as much as the next person, if I could go the rest of my life without setting foot here again, I would have no complaints. The sooner the better. It will only be a matter of time before Exar Kun regathers his strength to attack us."

"Well, no time like the present," I shrugged as I turned around to start making my way back out of the temple with Ikrit hot on my heels.

Damn, I just realized I didn't actually get anything for my Verd'goten. Oh well. I'll just grab one of those Howlers I killed on my way here. Explaining why we have a small furry hitchhiker to Krask is gonna be fun.

Meh. I'll just make something up. Maybe tell him the furball's my new pet.

Quest Completed: Last Battle of the Great Sith War

Explore the Temple of Woolamander.

Rewards: 100,000 points.

Bonus points will be awarded upon completion based on feats preformed during the course of the quest.

Calculating bonus points…

1000 points for completing a boss fight

A what now?

You know, boss fights? Like in games? A lot of important characters in Star Wars qualify.

Well, Exar DEFINITELY qualifies.

---

POV: 3rd Person

A normal Jedi Master would berate their padawan for not properly controlling their emotions in such a situation. However, as Qui-Gon Jinn observed the constant fidgeting of Obi-Wan Kenobi as they waited for the elevator they were in to reach its destination, the Jedi maverick felt no desire to do so. No, in fact he quite enjoyed watching his padawan squirm anxiously. It was a good reminder for him that as mature and skilled as Obi-Wan was, he was still a teenager.

"Nervous, my young padawan?" Qui-Gon spoke up after a few moments, deciding to show the young man mercy. "I haven't seen you like this since our duel with Xanatos."

"Apologies master," Obi-Wan replied, snapping out of his self-inflicted anxiety. "It's just been a long time we've seen the Duchess."

"Hmm…. I wonder if this anxiety stems from a professional interest or a personal one?" Qui-Gon grinned while his padawan stared at him fumbling for words.

"I uh… well. I was just…. She's- It isn't…."

"Ah! It appears we've arrived," Qui-Gon interrupted as the elevator came to a stop. The duo of master and padawan stepped out into a waiting room where they were met by two more Jedi. "Master Baltrann! It's been a long time."

"You're Dooku's former padawan," Baltrann mused as he observed the approaching duo. "Qui-Gon Jinn, correct?"

"Indeed, and this is my padawan learner Obi-Wan Kenobi," Qui-Gon introduced the teenager who proceeded to bow to the other two masters.

"A pleasure to meet you Padawan Kenobi," Baltrann nodded before gesturing towards the other nearby Jedi who had kept her to herself staring out the window at the city of Sundari. The most acknowledgement they received from her was a nod in their direction. "This is Jedi Master An'ya Kuro."

"You'll have to forgive her, Obi-Wan. The Dark Woman is notoriously unsociable," Qui-Gon chuckled before turning his attention back to Baltrann. "How long have you been waiting?"

"About half an hour. The duchess summoned the headmaster of the Sundari Royal Military Academy along with a few students she thought we'd like to speak with," Baltrann shrugged. "Hopefully, we'll be able to get some information from them regarding our elusive young Sith Lord."

"Apologies for the interruption, Master Jedi," a voice interrupted them. The four of them turned towards the entrance to the throne room where an old man that Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan remembered as Prime Minister Almec was ushering them in. "Duchess Kryze will see you now."

"Our thanks," Qui-Gon nodded before leading the four Jedi into the throne room where they found the duchess waiting for them. "It is a pleasure to see you again Almec."

"You as well, Master Jedi," Almec replied as they passed.

Within the throne room was the Duchess herself as well as an assortment of Mandalorian Royal Guards protecting, a few adolescents who Qui-Gon assumed were from Sundari Royal Military Academy based off their uniforms, a young man that he did not recognize but was clearly a high-ranking politician, and an older man in a military uniform that paid homage to the Mandalorian Old Ways who was most likely Headmaster Saxon.

"I bid you welcome Master Jedi," Duchess Satine Kryze greeted as she swept her eyes over the four of them, her eyes lingering an Obi-Wan noticeably longer than the rest much to Qui-Gon's amusement. "In particular, I am pleased to see you again, Master Jinn and Padawan Kenobi."

"The pleasure is ours, Duchess," Qui-Gon bowed before elbowing his padawan who had been staring slack jawed at the Duchess.

"Oh! It's good to see you again Satine- I mean- my lady," Obi-Wan managed to say without too much stuttering. A warm smile graced Satine's face for half a second before her impassive and regal demeanor resumed.

"Yes, yes. These reunions are all well and good, but time is of the essence," Kuro interrupted earning scowls from both Satine and the unknown young politician. "This boy has evaded us for four years now and this is the closest we've come to intercepting him. Every moment we delay gives him an advantage."

"The Dark Woman is right, although I don't care for how she phrased it" Qui-Gon said, deciding to interject before Kuro's lack of social graces began to interfere with the investigation. "There are four of us, so we should each interview a different subject. Master Kuro will speak with Headmaster Saxon, Master Baltrann with the cadets, and my padawan will confer with you, if that arrangement is acceptable to you, milady."

"I have no qualms with this arrangement whatsoever, Master Jedi," Satine beamed as she stared at Obi-Wan with an almost hungry glint in her eyes. "Padawan Kenobi, care to accompany on a stroll through the palace while we talk?"

"Of course, my lady," Obi-Wan bowed nervously.

"Good luck, my young padawan," Qui-Gon muttered quietly, prompting Obi-Wan to shoot him a halfhearted glare before taking the duchess's arm and walking off surrounded by her royal guards. Baltrann and Kuro were already speaking with the headmaster and his students which left Qui-Gon with the man whose name he still hadn't learned. "I suppose that leaves us, good sir."

"Indeed. Governor Pre Vizsla," Pre introduced himself as the two shook hands. "Your padawan seems to have a calming effect on the Duchess. Good thing too."

"Oh? Has something happened to the duchess?"

"A few days ago, during the yearly tournament, the Duchess spoke with the boy you're investigating," Pre sighed. "I don't know what he said to her, but she's been unsettled and quick to anger ever since."

"Have you met the boy?"

"Yes. After the incident at the tournament where he tortured some bounty hunters with electricity he was brought to the headmaster's office for disciplinary action," Pre informed him with narrowed eyes. "While the Duchess and Marquis Krytyg were arguing over potential punishments he should face, he just sat there bored. Like he didn't care. The only thing that got a reaction from him was when Krytyg mentioned expelling him from the academy and banishing him from Sundari. The thought of getting kicked out seemed to make him excited."

"It's rather odd for someone to want to be banished, so I suppose we can assume that he did not want to be here in the first place," Qui-Gon mused. "But if he didn't want to be here, what exactly was keeping him here?"

"I'm not sure, Master Jedi," Pre shrugged. "All I know is that he's spent the past 3 years attending the academy as a member of Team Gundark and left a few days ago to participate in the Verd'goten. I'm not usually involved in affairs of the academy or its students."

Several possibilities raced through the Jedi Master's mind. The most likely reason being that, for some reason, the boy's Sith Master had commanded him to attend the academy. But why? Was there something here on Mandalore they were seeking? Unlikely. Perhaps the master decided that Mandalorian training would serve his apprentice well? But if so, why bother participating in the Verd'goten? Perhaps the boy genuinely adhered to the principles of his Mandalorian heritage?

Whatever the answer, given the boy was likely aware that the Jedi would come to investigate after his show of power, it was unlikely that he would return to Mandalore.

"Governor, the academy wouldn't happen to keep blood samples of their students for medical purposes, would they?" Qui-Gon inquired, an idea forming in his head.

"Of course. It is a military academy after all. In injuries are expected to happen during training. Why do you ask?"

---

POV: Kazakin

Ah, it's good to be back on Concord Dawn. The people are violent, the sound of blaster fire echoes through the land, the smell of oil and smoke in the air, and I'm pretty sure someone's getting fucked behind the armory.

Yup. Good to be home.

"Are you done spacing out, boy?" Krask snapped his fingers, bringing my attention towards him and away from the spectacle occurring behind the armory. LAY OFF OLD MAN I'M HORNY!

"Yes, ba'buir," I sighed as I turned back to him. We were both seated in his prefab housing unit on the top of a hill overlooking the enclave. Honestly, the only reason I'm here is to drop him off along with Rook's mom. After this, I'm going to drop off Rook and Ikrit (who thankfully stayed on the ship) on Mandalore. Any stupid peace-loving statues made of beskar that are stolen during my time there will be completely coincidental and have nothing to do with me. After that, I'm finally free. "So, what's next? My Verd'goten is complete, right?"

"Yes, bu'ad. You're now recognized as a full-fledged Mandalorian," Krask nodded, somehow managing to look both proud and disgruntled at the same time. "And seeing as you've completed the bare minimum of your education, as per the terms of our agreement four years ago, you're now free to do whatever the kark you want. The Gra'tua is yours. Seems fitting see as you're the one who 'acquired' it in the first place."

Quest Completed: The Verd'goten

Complete the rite of passage known as the Verd'goten.

Rewards: 50,000 points, 3 Uncommon Item Boxes, you will be recognized as a Mandalorian and a proper member of Clan Ordo by others.

Bonus points will be awarded upon completion based on feats preformed during the course of the quest.

Calculating bonus points…..

200 for wiping out an entire Howler pack

Quest Completed: 3 Years of Peace

Get through your time at the Royal Military Academy without directly killing anyone.

Rewards: 1,000 points and a Universal Item Box

Bonus points will be awarded upon completion based on feats preformed during the course of the quest.

Calculating bonus points…..

1,000 points for leaving a lasting impact on many notable Mandalorians both friend and foe

Quest Completed: The Royal Military Academy

Complete the bare minimum of your Mandalorian education (you can drop out at once you've completed your Verd'goten).

Rewards: 5,000 points and a Universal Item Box (assuming 3 Years of Peace has been successfully completed)

Calculating bonus points….

None, because you almost got kicked out you psycho

How many points do I have now, Oz?

I was getting to that! 485,530 points total! Any idea what you want to spend them on, partner?

Not yet. I want to save them for a rainy day. Think of it like an emergency fund. Besides, I don't wanna go around buying things if I don't know what I'm gonna use them for.

Fair enough. Let me know if you decide to buy something!

Now that I think about it, I think this is the first time I've been without any quests to complete. I bet that won't last long.

"Thirteen years old and already going out into the galaxy on your own. Ashla would be so proud. Either that or she'd strangle the life out of me for going along with this," Krask chuckled, bringing my attention back to him. "Now before you go, I have one last gift for you before you leave."

"What is it?" I inquired. The old man didn't answer me at first and instead stood up, gestured for me to follow him, and went into the backroom which served as his beskar forge. Laid out upon his workbench was a full set of Mandalorian armor and a beskar knife. The armr was unpainted, so it looked more or less like Din Djarin's armor from the Mandalorian series. The only differences were that it was smaller and had a red visor as opposed to the typical black visor.

"I made a set of beskar'gam for you while you were away at the academy," Krask said. "You'll need a new set when you grow older, but for now the straps are adjustable enough that it should serve you well for next few years as long as you take proper care of it."

"Vor entye, ba'buir," I thanked him as I stared at the armor wide-eyed. Mandalorian armor. MY Mandalorian armor! There's not a Star Wars nerd alive who wouldn't be awed. It feels like Christmas came early!

"Go ahead and put it on, then get out of here before anyone finds out you let a Jedi into the Enclave," Krask chuckled before leaving. I grimaced at that. I'd told everyone on the ship that Ikrit was my new pet when I brought him onboard. After all, bringing a Jedi onto a ship full of Mandalorians? Yeah. That would've gone over well (not). Besides, I can't wait to try on my armor.

About fifteen minutes later I exited Krask's prefab garbed in the armor he'd made for me and an appropriately Sithy black cloak worn over it and the knife tucked into my utility belt. Rook should just about be ready to return to Mandalore based off the fact that her mother just threw her out of a window (perfectly normal) and Ikrit never left the ship to begin with, we should be ready to leave soon.

With one last glance behind me, taking in Krask's place for what would likely be the last time for a very long time (taking particular intrest in the shattered helm of Mandalore the Preserver that was still ddisplayed up on a wall) I started making my way down the hill and into the enclave proper. There's just one more thing to take care of before I leave…..

---

POV: Valkia

As I left the firing range, I sighed contentedly to myself. These past few years had been peaceful, well, as peaceful as a Mandalorian Enclave can be. No explosions. No death. No angry Jedi. No one trying to kill me. No planets getting destroyed. And best of all, absolutely no Kazaki-

"HI VAL!"

SON OF NERF HERDER!

I slowly turned around in resignation, ready to accept the cruel fate that was about to come crashing down upon me, and there HE was. His hair almost reached his shoulders, he was taller, and he dressed in proper Mandalorian armor save for the helmet he had tucked under his arm. For the briefest of moments I fantasized that he might've changed. Maybe he'd matured or at least mellowed out. But the moment I saw that devil-may-care grin on his face and that 'I'm gonna burn the whole kriffing galaxy down for no other reason than because I got bored' look in his eyes, I knew that he was still the same old psychopath.

It's a damn shame. I'd probably find him pretty handsome if he didn't scare the kark out of me.

"Did you miss me?" he smirked his yellow eyes gleaming with mirth.

"Absolutely not," was my automatic response. It was also, to my eternal shame, a lie. Despite his utter lack of redeeming qualities, he was still my friend and savior.

Blech. Even thinking about him being a savior leaves a foul taste in my mouth, no matter how true it is.

"Oh Val, you're breaking my heart!" he sobbed unconvincingly for a few moments before staring directly into my eyes with a look in them I hadn't seen in them since I got dragged to Malachor. A gaze that was hungry, anticipatory, and downright terrifying in its intensity. "Aaaaaaaaaaaanywaaaaaaaaaay. I'm about to embark on epic quest! I don't what exactly it will be about, but people will die, things will explode, and (most importantly) I will have fun! Either that or I'll get bored and go find a brothel or something," he shrugged towards the end before spinning and extending his hand towards me. "So, what do you say, Val? You ready to join on my cavalcade of chaos?"

He's rehearsed this little speech. I don't know how or why, but he has. Worse, despite everything I know, I'm actually tempted to join him. For all his COUNTLESS flaws, somehow, I know he'd never let anyone or anything hurt me. But I know that where he goes, destruction is sure to follow. That's not something I want to be a part of.

"I'm not going with you Kazakin," I reply firmly. My refusal is met with a look I can't decipher. "Remember what you told me when we returned from Malachor? You said that this place was a good place to learn skills that would useful whether I became a Mandalorian or not. You were right. From here I can forge my own path."

"….. What do you plan on doing?" he inquired after a few moments of silence.

"I want to stay here, learn, and train. The galaxy is a messy place and there will always be a need for smugglers," I grinned uneasily, still wary of his unreadable expression. "I just want to be the master of my own fate."

"I guess I can respect that, even if it does sound boring," he sighed. "Well good luck to you, Val. If you ever need me, just hit me up over a holocall or something."

"Still friends?" I asked.

"Still friends," he grinned. Dammit he's handsome when he's not being an evil prick. I gave him a hug and immediately regretted it as he picked me up, threw me over his shoulder, and started carrying me to the ship. "Also, I refuse your refusal and you're coming with me anyway."

"YOU ASSHOLE!" I screamed, as I started flailing in an admittedly futile attempt to free myself.

"Yes. That is me. I am asshole."

"THIS IS KIDNAPPING!"

"Oh please. You can't kidnap an orphan; they were never wanted in the first place!"

"KAZAKIN ORDO, I WILL CASTRATE YOU!"

"No, you won't!"

"YES, I WILL!"

"Think of it this way, Val," he spoke somewhat seriously. "You want to become a smuggler? Stick with me and you'll get some real-life experience, establish a reputation, AND enough credits to start your little enterprise."

… Sithspit, he's actually making a lot of sense. I hate it when he does that.

"Fiiiiiiiiiiine," I groan. "But at least let me go get my stuff."

"No need. I already packed it all up for you."

"…"

"…"

"You can put me down now."

"Whatevs. We're here anyway," he shrugged as lowered me back onto my feet right next to my belongings that he'd packed up and boarded the Gra'tua. I almost expected him to just drop me like a sack of potatoes. "Rook! I'm back and kidnapped an orphan!"

"He means me!" I shouted as I grabbed my stuff. "Hey, Rook!"

"Su cuy'gar, Val!" Rook called from the cockpit. "Go ahead and get settled in! Kaz and I will get us airborne!"

I started to navigate the familiar rooms of the Gra'tua as Kazakin marches up the stairs to the cockpit. Passing through the lounge as I made my way to the crew's quarters, I came across a small furry creature I'd never seen before, fast asleep.

"Oh, aren't you adorable," I cooed as I reached out to pet him.

"Oh, by the Force, not you too," the creature moaned, shocking me with his ability to speak, as he awoke. "I had to put up with your young Sith friend petting me the whole way here and pretending to be his PET! I am Jedi Master, thank you very much!"

"Uh…. Sorry?"

"Ah, don't mind me," the creature waved me off. "I'm simply not a morning person. Speaking of which, I'm going back to sleep."

And with that, he was out like a light. I shook my head as I continued to my old quarters and dropped off my belongings.

Well, here I am. Getting sucked back into the madness.

Dammit Kaz.

---

POV: 3rd Person

Qui-Gon didn't waste time once he returned from the academy. After confirming the location of his padawan, who was apparently attending a private dinner with the duchess, he quickly made his way to the guest room that Satine had granted him in the palace for the duration of his stay. Within the folds of his robes, he had a sample of Kazakin Ordo's blood that he'd acquired.

With a weary exhale, Qui-Gon lowered himself into a seat in front of terminal and immediately got to work. A simple test on the boy's red blood cells would provide the Jedi Master with the answers he sought. It might not help them track the Sith, but it would at least give them an idea of what they were dealing with.

After a few moments of waiting, Qui-Gon gets his results: a midichlorian count.

"By the Force," Qui-Gon gasped as he stared at the number he was presented with. Never in all of recorded galactic history had a Force user had such a number. With an anxious sigh, Qui-Gon pushed himself away from the terminal and started pacing the room. "Will the Council see what this could mean, or would they simply ignore it and bury their heads in the sand again? How would Master Dooku handle this?"

---

POV: Kazakin

I landed the Gra'tua onto a Sundari landing platform with practiced ease. It's the middle of the night on this side of Mandalore. Any normal person is asleep by now. Good thing there's nothing normal about me. Nobody has attempted to hail my ship to ask me who I am, where am I going, or if my ship registered. I don't know if someone is sleeping on the job or if Sundari security is just kinda lax but, based off my experiences living here for the past three years, I'm inclined towards the latter.

"Hey, Ikrit! This is where you get off!" I shouted from the cockpit causing Rook, who had been sleeping next to me in the copilot's seat, to wake up with a snort. "Kindly get the hell off my ship!"

"He's a rather rude Sith, isn't he?" I heard Ikrit mutter from downstairs.

"I'd say that you get used to him, but I'd be lying," Valkia snarked in response, prompting me to poke my head out the cockpit and look downstairs at the two of them. "Just be glad you're not sticking around."

"I'll keep that in mind," the fuzzy Jedi seemed amused. "Before I leave, however, I will require some credits in order to acquire transportation to the local authorities. From there, I intend to contact the Jedi Council on Coruscant to request a pickup."

"Giving you money was never a part of our agreement!" I protested.

"Oh? Is that the sound of a Darksider who wants me to drag him with me back to Coruscant?"

Smug little furry whatever-he-is…..

"Fiiiiiiiiiiiiine," I groaned as I tossed him a credit chip. Honestly, I never cared whether I gave him the credits or not. I just wanted to complain. "Can you leave now?"

"Yes, yes. I'm on my way out," the adorable Jedi chuckled as made his way out of the ship. "Until next we meet, Darth Krul!"

I shook my head as he departed before ducking back into the cockpit bringing the ship back into the air. I didn't have far to go. My next stop was the Royal Military Academy to drop off Rook.

As much as I was relieved to see Ikrit go, I'll miss petting him.

…

That's it. That's my only regret. Anyone who says that, for an extremely brief moment, I contemplated joining him and going to Coruscant to become a Jedi Knight is a lying liar who lies.

Being a Jedi would be cool and all, what kid hasn't dreamed of being a Jedi after all, but it really wouldn't suite my hedonistic ass and I hate rules. On a more pragmatic note, I was known to the Banite Sith now. Joining the Jedi would just put a target on my back and I would become their highest priority to eliminate. Besides, when the Clone Wars come around the Jedi are going to be under Sidious's thumb and he'll lead them to their own destruction. No way in hell am I going to blindly obey a man conspiring to kill me. I have my own plans on how to undermine him and leave my own mark on the galaxy.

"Goddammit, stop thinking about it," I shook my head to clear of such thoughts, waking up Rook in the process. She looked around groggily for a few moments before she seemed to realize where we were and frowned. She was oddly quiet. She clearly had something she wanted to say, but whatever it may be was being left unsaid for now. She's never been this quiet in the entire time I've known her. I was actually a little worried.

I know! Me! Worried! HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD?

A quick use of Observe was enough to tell me everything I needed to know, but unless she decided to bring it up, I planned on keeping my mouth shut.

For now.

I landed the ship a short distance from the academy after a few minutes of awkward silence from Rook. Full disclosure: I am not authorized to land here. But since when has that ever stopped me?

"Alright Rook, we're here," I said as I lifted myself out of my seat. "Go grab your shit."

Rook quietly did as I said, heading into the crew quarters and grabbing her duffel bag. I made sure to follow so that I had the chance to grab something from my own luggage. I'd prepared this piece of junk 22 months after I arrived at the academy and goddammit, I was going to use it before I left. With her bag slung over her shoulders, Rook and I exited the Gra'tua started making our way back to academy.

"Heads up, security at 2 o'clock," Rook hissed, finally breaking her silence as we walked and tilting her head in the direction of an approaching guard.

"Excuse me, young man," a clearly underpaid security guard called out as he approached. "You're not authorized to land here. I'm gonna have to ask you to move your ship to a designated landing zo-"

"You are very tired, you want to take a nap, and you will have no recollection of us or our ship when you awake," I waved my hand at him while using a Mind Trick.

"I'm so tired," he muttered before shuffling away in a manner that had more in common with a zombie than a human being.

"Well, I guess this is it Rook," I sighed as I turned away from the academy and looked into the distance. Specifically, I was looking in the direction of a certain statue which happened to be constructed purely out of beskar in Adonai Memorial Park (named after Satine's father) dedicated to peace and the New Mandalorian Way. "I'll see you around."

Hey Oz, would I be able to shove that statue into my inventory?

Yeah, but you can only fit one large item into your inventory at a time.

Perfect.

"Wait!" Rook shouted, causing me to turn back towards her. The moment I did, she latched onto me like a spider monkey and gave me a hug. "I'm gonna miss you."

"Of course you will, I'm me after all," I quipped.

"How humble of you," she snarked back with a grin. Just as I was about to make a clever comeback (because that's what I do) she shut me up by slamming her lips against mine and making my brain go AWOOGA.

"Mmph!?" was my elegant response instead.

….

Wow, she's really getting in there.

….

Is…. Is that her tongue?

….

Oh god, I can't breathe.

….

…. is not responding.

….

"Ah, I've wanted to do that for a while," Rook smirked as she finally pulled her tongue out of my throat, mischief and something I couldn't recognize dancing in her eyes. "Welp, make sure you stay in touch Kaz, and when you finally find a good fight, make sure you invite your vode to join in on the fun. And just remember: this was only a taste of what I'm going to do to you the next time we meet."

With that she turned around, grabbed her stuff, and trotted back towards the academy with a spring in her step. I, on the other hand, just continued to stand there for a few moments processing the events of the past two minutes.

I'd never kissed anyone in my entire life. My previous life included. Not a lot of romantic opportunities for a kid stuck in a hospital with one foot in the grave and the other foot on a banana peel.

Just to make sure I wasn't jumping to conclusions; I used Observe on Rook one last time before she was out of range.

Name: Rook Kast

Race: Human

Force Potential: Negligible

Threat level: Medium

Skills: Martial Arts, Blasters, Dueling, Tactics, Stealth, Demolitions, Hunting

Thoughts on you:

Regretting not fucking your brains out on the trip back to Mandalore. To hell with whether Valkia would be uncomfortable with the noises.

….. Well, not a lot of room for interpretation there. I'm almost tempted to follow back to the academy.

Almost…..

However, I hate school, and I really shouldn't spend any more time on Mandalore. After that little spectacle I pulled back during the tournament, it would only be a matter of time before the Jedi showed up here investigating me and that's assuming they're not already here. Also, if I'm going to fuck Rook, I need to some practice in with bitches whose opinions don't matter. I don't want to leave her disappointed after all. Maybe I should return to Nar Shadda and hit up a brothel? Something to think about later. Anyway, time to do what I came here to do.

I quickly teleported over to Adonai Memorial Park, specifically right in front of the statue I've been planning on stealing for about three years.

"YOINK!" I shouted with glee as, with the snap of my fingers, the whole statue disappeared into my inventory. However, it would be just downright rude of me not to leave something behind for our dear duchess, wouldn't it? So, I placed my little contraption down where the statue used to be, set the timer, and teleported back to the ship. My work here is done.

5000 points for stealing a national monument

Well, that was easy. GOODBYE MANDALORE!

---

POV: 3rd Person

Qui-Gon sighed as he exited his quarters, putting an end to incessant knocking at the door that had awoken him. Opening the door, he found himself face-to-face with Almec who looked a bit stressed.

"Is something wrong, Prime Minister?" Qui-Gon inquired with a yawn, blinking rapidly as his eyes adjusted to the brightness of the morning sun shining through the nearby windows.

"Very. Follow me, Master Jedi. We must collect the Duchess and make our way to the throne room with haste!" Almec demanded hurriedly as he took off down the halls at a brisk pace with Qui-Gon hot on his heels.

"Where are my fellow Jedi?" Qui-Gon inquired as followed the Prime Minister.

"Masters Kuro and Baltrann departed before sunrise," Almec replied, his pace not slowing as he turned down another hall. "They said that they were going to investigate the Mandalorian Enclave on Concord Dawn in an attempt to find more information on the young man you've been searching for. I checked your padawan's quarters before I came to get you, but he wasn't there."

"I see. Would you care to explain what's happening?" Qui-Gon said. He was unconcerned regarding his padawan's whereabouts as, while he was still tad groggy and couldn't pinpoint Kenobi's precise position, he was aware enough to sense his presence somewhere within the palace.

"It would be best that I explain after we've collected the Duchess. I'd hate to have to repeat myself," Almec sighed as they approached an ornate set of double doors. He swiftly banged his fist on them and began shouting. "I apologize for waking you in this manner your grace, but there is a situation that requires your immediate attention!"

There was a great deal of shuffling and muffled voices behind the doors before they opened, revealing two disheveled and hastily dressed teenagers. Satine glared at Almec in embarrassment and frustration while Obi-Wan stared at Qui-Gon terrified and mortified. Qui-Gon stared back, torn between the urge to facepalm and laugh.

"M-master, I can explain," Obi-Wan stuttered. "I-We were just…"

"We'll talk later, my young padawan," Qui-Gon waved him off.

"Almec, I trust you have a good reason for disturbing me," Satine huffed with her arms crossed.

"Yes. Follow me, I'll explain while we walk," Almec said, pointedly ignoring the duchess's ire, as he turned around and continued on his way towards the throne room with the others in tow. "The Mandalorian Excision Monument was stolen from Adonai Memorial Park."

"What!?" Satine exclaimed, her fury and shock being felt even by those who weren't Force sensitive. "Who dares to desecrate a monument to, not just my father, but peace itself?"

"We don't know," Almec grunted as they all entered the throne room where Pre was waiting for them. "But whoever has done this let behind some sort of device in place of the statue. We don't know what it is, but it has a timer and its close to going off. The Mandalorian Guard have the area cordoned off and the bomb squad is on the scene."

"Do we have any ideas what the device is?" Qui-Gon inquired, instantly on alert.

"We're not sure," Pre admitted before pressing a button on a nearby terminal, causing a large screen to emerge from a nearby wall for the group to view. Displayed on the screen the Sundari News Network was reporting live as the Mandalorian Guard set up a perimeter around the unknown device while the bomb squad was attempting to examine it without much success. "Some think that it's a chemical weapon but most of the Guard think it's some sort IED."

"Sithspit," Kenobi muttered, staring at the screen in shock. "How did this happen?"

"We don't know," Pre growled, confusion and frustration etched onto his face. "The park is a place open to the public so there were no guards, but there is surveillance at every way in or out of the park and we would've seen someone drag a massive statue out of there. It just shouldn't be possible."

"And yet, here we are," Satine grumbled. She continued to glare at the screen unblinkingly until she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to berate whoever it was until she found herself locking eyes with Obi-Wan who offered her a nervous smile and a reassuring squeeze on her shoulder. She didn't say anything, but she did grasp his hand and held it gently as she returned her attention to the screen.

"Wait, somethings happening," Qui-Gon, who had observed the exchange between his padawan and the duchess half amused and half concerned, spoke up as he pointed at the screen. The device had lit up and the Mandalorian Guard had made a mad dash to get behind whatever cover they could find, prepared for the worst.

But there was no explosion or dispersal of toxic gas. Instead, a single massive hologram was projected into the air. The image displayed was a crudely vandalized picture of Satine with an absurd curly moustache drawn on her face, a monocle, and the word 'bitch' written on her forehead.

And then it came. Broadcasted live for all of Mandalore an obnoxious, high-pitched voice started to sing.

WEEEEEEELL Satine's a bitch she's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world she's a big stupid bitch if there ever was a bitch, she's a bitch to all the boys and girls!

On Monday she's a bitch, on Tuesday she's a bitch, on Wednesday through Saturday she's a bitch, then on Sunday just to be different she's a super King Kamehameha beeyotch!

Have you ever met the Duchess Satine she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world; she's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair she's a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch!

Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, she's a stupid bitch!

WOOO!

The duchess is a bitch and she's such a dirty bitch!

Talk to kids from other worlds and it might go a little bit somethin' like this!

凯子的妈妈是个泼妇，她是基佬秘术大师，我只想说，摸了被她变泼妇

La duchesse est une pute, c'est pour ça qu'on dit la plus grande pute du monde entier.

Satine is een vieze teef, vieze kutwijf.

Chifu Satine ni mbwa mkubwa, ndiye ni mbwa mkubwa kuliko wote duniani hii.

Have you ever met the Duchess Satine she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world she's a mean old bitch and she has stupid hair; she's a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch!

Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, she's a stupid bitch!

WOOO!

The Duchess is a bitch and she's just a dirty bitch!

I really mean it!

SATIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE...

She's a big fat fucking biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!

A big ol' fat fuckin' bitch, Ducheeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssssssssss... bitch!

… All of Sundari was silent, but somewhere out in space there was an adolescent psychopath laughing his ass off.

Speaking of whom….

---

POV: Kazakin

+1000 points for creating the galaxy's first meme

Well, it's about damn time.

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! GET FUCKED YOU STUPID BITCH! HAHAHAHA!" I cackled while leaning back in my pilot's seat. Ah, what I would've given to see Satine's face.

"What are you laughing at?" Valkia inquired, looking at me with concern from the copilot's seat next to me.

"Hehehehe….. I was laughing at a joke," I chuckled, my laughter starting to die down.

"What's the joke?"

"….. You wouldn't get it," I sighed as I leaned forward. "Well, Valkia, we're free to go wherever we want! The galaxy is ours to do with as we wish!"

"I wish to go home."

"Nobody asked you, Val."

For some reason, she then proceeded to flip me off. When did she even learn what means? I don't think that's a Sta- Oh, right. She's spent years around me. She definitely knows what it means by now.

"So, where are we going first, oh captain?" she asked sarcastically, still extending her middle finger in my direction.

I had a few ideas of where to go. I still plan on going to Galidraan at some point to kill the little shit who sold me, and by 'me' I mean the previous owner of this body, into slavery and retrieve all of the beskar armor he took after the massacre there. Returning all of that armor to their ancestral clans will earn me a lot of influence which I'll be needing in the future.

But first thing's first. Before I do anything, I need to make my own lightsaber. Don't get me wrong, the one I've been using is all well and good, but I really want my own. That means getting my hands on the parts needed to construct the hilt. As for the crystal, I might steal one for myself but it isn't a priority. After all, I can just pop the red one out of the stupid cross guard saber I've been using and plug it into the saber I construct.

So…..

Quest added: Your Lightsaber

Collect the materials you need and construct your own personal lightsaber.

Rewards: 2,000 points.

Bonus points will be awarded upon completion based on feats preformed during the course of the quest.

Failure: Conditional.

"Hey Valkia, have you ever heard of Illum?"