Fighting The Tide

Chapter One: The Competitors

Welcome to the third part of this story!

Hater has run into his former villainous idol, Major Threat, and gotten a bit of a shock. Worried that there may have been some romantic involvement between the reformed villain and his new boyfriend, Hater has come up with a brilliant, foolproof plan that Wander won't be able to resist. Let's find out how it goes!

Thank you so much to everyone who read and commented on Taking The Plunge and Learning To Swim. I had so much fun writing them, and it was so nice to hear what everyone thinks of the story so far. I really appreciate all the lovely feedback I've received. I know for a fact I wouldn't update nearly so fast if it wasn't for all of you!

I'm very excited to start the next installment. We are beginning with an alternate version of The Battle Royal. It's such a good episode and I really tried to do it justice. I really hope you like the direction I took this in. For obvious reasons, we couldn't exactly stick to the original plot.

Enjoy the first chapter!

"Okay, so this was maaaaybe not part of my plan," Hater muttered, peering out of the skull-ship's window at the chaos below.

"Your plan?" Peepers snapped incredulously.

On the desolate rock beneath them, countless villains and their minions were fighting desperately with each other. Blaster fire ricocheted off the rocks and hoards of fist fighters wrestled with General McGuffin's wingmen. Li'l Bits seemed to have found a massive gun of some kind and was firing it wildly, and outdated robots clanked ominously towards Sourdough's beefeaters, who had formed a defensive formation around their ruler.

Hater glanced askance at his third in command, as though Peepers was missing something obvious.

"Yeah, you know, when I planted the ring of invincibility up there." Hater pointed and Peepers' eye trailed up to the battle's focal point, at a sparkling ring perched at the tip of one of the floating snags of rock above the battlefield, the highest point on this little planetoid.

"How would I possibly know that?" Peepers demanded. "And where did you even get a ring of invincibility anyway?"

Hater waved a hand dismissively.

"From that gem planet, the one with the weird rainbow crystal guys."

Peepers was beginning to feel like he was trapped in some kind of logic puzzle. His boss seemed to be making less sense the more he said. Leaving aside how Hater had even found a ring of invincibility on Gemoria III, whose inhabitants made pretty jewelry, but didn't have any kind of special powers…

"Then why would you put it up there?" he asked, summoning as much calm into his voice as he could manage.

Hater looked confused, and slightly impatient.

"Well, so it'll look all impressive when I march up there to get it and do my cool poses. Then when Wander shows up…"

"Wait, why would Wander be there?"

"To stop me, Peepers, duh!" Hater glared down at the battlefield. "I figured when I made that announcement about how I was going to grab that ring of invincibility and become the Greatest in the Galaxy, Wander would be sure to show up and try to distract me. What I don't get is what all these other villains are doing here. They're totally going to get in the way of my plan!"

Peepers paused for a second, taking a deep breath in and out, before looking up at Hater again.

"Sir, just what exactly is this plan for?"

Hater was definitely annoyed now.

"Grop, Peepers!" he snapped. "My plan to ask Wander to marry me!" Peepers' lower eyelid sunk down in shock, practically hitting the floor, his muscles twitching involuntarily, but Hater didn't seem to notice as he continued. "I'll be all impressive and powerful, and he'll show up to try and distract me or something, but then he'll be all 'Oh Hater, you look so powerful and awesome!' And then I'll ask him to marry me, and he won't be able to resist. Let's see Major Threat try to win him back then!" Hater grinned triumphantly, eyebrows raising and lowering suggestively. Then he glanced back at his commander, finally taking in his shocked appearance and twitching eyelid. "You know, Peepers. I told you all this before."

"No, sir!" Peepers finally exploded. "You didn't tell me anything about this before!"

His cry rang out through the thick walls of the skull-ship before fading away amid the noise and chaos on the planetoid below.

"Remind me what we're doing here again?" Sylvia poked her head out from behind a snag of rock, pulling it back almost immediately as a laser whizzed overhead.

"Aw, don't be silly, silly," Wander laughed from behind her, voice far too loud for the zbornak's taste. "When we heard about this whole 'ring of invincibility' thing, I figured with so many of our friends showin' up to fight over it, someone was bound to get hurt if we weren't here to help."

"Uhuh." Sylvia peered back out at the chaos again, careful this time to keep herself covered behind the rock.

"Plus, well," Wander tapped his fingers together, glancing back out at the battlefield himself, "Hatey said he was goin' to come claim the ring, so there's prolly gonna be a lot of people comin' after him especially." He looked up at her hopefully.

Sylvia sighed, eyes turning skyward in a silent plea for help before they focused back on her pal.

"Okay, buddy. Put the eyes away, we'll stay, but please try to be careful. I don't think I can protect you out there."

"Don't worry, Sylvia." Wander flapped a hand dismissively. "Everyone's just a tad enthusiastic. I'm sure it's not as bad as it looks." There was a heavy thunk as a fist fighter was sent crashing into the rock they were hiding behind and both of them jumped. "Hmmmm," Wander stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Well, they do seem mighty full a' beans today. Alright, I promise I'll try ta be careful."

"Thank you," Sylvia sighed. "Besides, I'm sure old bonehead will be fine. The optic nerd'll keep him on track." Both nomads glanced upward to where the skull-ship was hovering overhead, apparently looking for a place to land. Suddenly it dropped to the ground, watchdogs swarming out of the open mouth with Hater close behind to join the fray. "…Probably," Sylvia finished with slightly less confidence. She eyed Wander's concerned gaze, already focused on the skeletal overlord.

All she knew was that Hater had better stay safe, because if he got into trouble, she knew Wander's promise to be careful would go strait out the window.

Well, despite all of the other villains inexplicably showing up, Hater was still convinced this was a great plan.

After his encounter with Major Threat, he'd done a lot of thinking about what the former villain had said, and he'd come to some conclusions.

First, despite Peepers' assurances to the contrary, Hater still thought there was a good chance Major Threat and Wander had been romantically involved, and that meant he couldn't dismiss the possibility that Major Threat had come to this galaxy to try to get back together with the nomad.

Hater wasn't about to let that happen. Even though he was still figuring out his feelings for the little weirdo, he knew he absolutely didn't want Wander to be with anyone else. Wander was his boyfriend, and no other villain, former or otherwise, was going to get in his way. Therefore, he had to act fast.

It was funny; from the moment he'd realized that he'd stopped hating Wander, even up to the time they'd started dating, when he'd known he was feeling something quite different for the little oddball, he'd never been worried about losing him. It was probably because Wander was constantly showing up, barging into his plans and hanging around. It had never seemed possible for Wander to leave him alone, so it hadn't occurred to Hater he even could lose him.

Wander liked him. That was something he'd always known, even way back when he'd first encountered the little freak. There had never been any malice in the orange toothpick. He had captured the nomad, threatened him with horrible fates, insulted him and tried to destroy him constantly, yet Wander had always wanted to be around him. He had always been genuinely happy to see Hater, worried about him when he was sad and interested in what Hater had been doing, regardless of whether what he had been doing was planning for Wander's untimely demise.

And, eventually, all that attention had made Hater feel, well, a little special if he was being honest.

He'd fixated on Wander for so long, it was actually kind of nice to realize that Wander was equally focused on him, that he was such an important person in Wander's warped little mind.

Especially once that obsessive hatred he'd been feeling started to change into something else.

He didn't hate Wander anymore; he couldn't. And Hater should know. He'd tried hard enough to convince himself, even when seeing Wander about to finally be destroyed hadn't brought him triumphant glee, but instead resulted in a panic-stricken rush to save the nomad from the weapon he'd set off. After that, it had been pretty clear to Hater that he no longer wanted Wander to suffer or die, or any of the horrible fates he used to fall asleep dreaming about, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Now, the intensity of emotion was still there, but without the hatred attached. He still thought about Wander all the time, but his feelings now were strange and sometimes confusing, and he wasn't always sure what they meant.

He…liked spending time with the nomad, even when they were just sitting and talking. He liked having Wander show up and smile those special smiles that were only for him. He liked when Wander cooked for him, stayed beside him and slipped his hand into Hater's. He liked that when he told Wander a story the nomad listened closely to him and seemed to actually be interested in what he was saying. And he liked how strangely safe he'd started to feel around Wander. The little alien had been there for him during the party, when he'd been trying to figure out what to do. Wander had been a comforting presence when he'd needed him to be.

Then there was all the other stuff; the way Hater's bones tingled with his electricity when Wander was close, when he touched him or snuggled against his side and the soft warmth of his fur against Hater's bones, those looks Wander gave him that made his cheekbones hot, that made Hater want to get close, to touch the nomad in turn. There was the silky softness of the fur on Wander's lips when they kissed, the sweet, rustic taste of his mouth, and the way Wander's heart beat faster and his breathing got heavy. Then, there was the way Wander looked at him when Hater took the lead, when he managed to surprise the nomad. There was a look in Wander's eyes then that made Hater feel incredibly powerful, and weak at the same time, and even though it was kind of a frightening feeling it was something he'd started to crave.

It really hadn't been that long, and yet Hater couldn't imagine losing any of that.

He'd been a little worried, not a lot, but a little. He hadn't been sure exactly why Wander liked him, and that was something he was still struggling with, but he'd never imagined there might be competition, that someone might actually try to take Wander from him.

He supposed it made sense once he actually started thinking about it. Wander spent his days traveling all across the galaxy, helping everyone he came across, singing stupid songs, feeding the hungry and generally being an annoying ray of sunshine that brightened up everyone's day. And he seemed to make friends with almost everyone he came across, as well as drawing the ire and attention of most of the galaxy's villains.

So, it shouldn't be too far fetched that some of those aliens he met and either helped or foiled ended up liking him, right?

He was always so flarping nice and sweet and helpful. That was the problem. Anyone could start liking him. If Hater could even start liking the little pest after all the plans he'd ruined and humiliations he'd caused for the overlord, well, that was proof, wasn't it?

Major Threat's story had been uncomfortably familiar to Hater. The former villain had been obsessed with destroying Wander. He'd chased the nomad all across the galaxy much as Hater had. Hater didn't know all the details, and he didn't particularly want to know too much about how it had all happened, but he knew enough.

But when Major Threat finally gave in to Wander, when he finally succumbed to the annoying little furball, how had that happened, exactly? And what had happened afterward?

Threat had said they were best friends. Hater supposed that could be all there was to it, but he still had his suspicions. They sat like a solid lump where his stomach should be. There had been something about the way Major Threat had talked about the nomad, some wistful, fond emotion in his voice that made Hater's figurative hackles raise. That and Threat had apparently had a nickname for Wander. That was suspicious all by itself. And what was the former conqueror even doing in this galaxy in the first place? He'd never been here before. He must be looking for Wander.

Well, he was going to be too late.

The skull-ship settled to the rocky ground and the mouth gaped, tongue extending. The watchdog army poured out to join the battle and Hater stalked after them, doing his best to appear impressive and menacing. Peepers still appeared fairly shell-shocked as he followed, but Hater ignored his third in command's lack of focus.

This was his moment. He had to get to the top and be the first to reach the ring. He needed to be ready to pose dramatically when Wander showed up. Maybe all the chaos would actually be to his advantage. Beating all the other villains was sure to show Wander how impressive and powerful he was. Then Wander would fall for his charms and accept his proposal. That was the important part. The nomad had to say 'yes.' That was why everything had to go perfectly, and Hater was going to make sure it did.

No one was getting in his way this time.

As soon as he stepped off of the tongue he was surrounded by the fray.

Groups of watchdogs to his left and right peeled off to engage with bands of fist fighters and wingmen respectively. Hater found himself dodging out of the way of laser blasts, explosions and airborne minions as he crossed the battlefield.

Fortunately, many of the other villains seemed to have gotten distracted fighting each other, and no one was directly blocking his path to the upper ledges of rock that lead to that high plateau.

Just before he reached the first ledges, almost rough stairs leading upward, a familiar figure leaped into view, landing in front of him and posing, muscled arms flexing. Hater's eyes narrowed, already incensed with this particular foe.

"Emperor Awesome!" he roared.

"Well, look who's trying to play with the big villains," Awesome taunted. "I was surprised when I saw that video you sent out. Figured after you and that dork started going out, you'd realized you couldn't compete with the rest of us. Noticed you haven't done much permanent conquering lately. This your lame attempt to get back on top?" The shark villain smirked, although he did take a nervous step backward when Hater's hands sparked green in rage.

"That's none of your business, Awesome!" Hater growled. He would have liked to say something more scathing, but apparently Awesome's swagger and his pointed jabs were still hitting uncomfortably close to home. "I'm not interested in anything you have to say!"

"You wanna go, loser?" Awesome seemed to hesitate for a moment, but a few of his fist fighters coming up behind him seemed to boost his confidence. The two sides closed on each other with no more words exchanged, and for a moment, Hater almost forgot his objective, so focused was he on dodging minions and the blows from his opponent, and dishing out his own attacks. It was still incredibly satisfying every time he landed a blow on the insufferable villain. It felt like getting his own back slightly from all the fretting and worry said villain had caused.

When Awesome finally fell, singed and dazed, and at least temporarily beaten, Hater suddenly remembered his plan. The battle was still surging, but several villains were now higher up on the floating rock platforms, engaged in fighting with each other on a more individual scale, while the main fight continued around him.

Zapping his way through the remaining fist fighters, Hater finally found himself at the base of those stone stairs once again, and began working his way upward.

"Well, that coulda gone worse, I suppose."

Wander peered through his self-made finger goggles, as Hater began climbing the platforms. He and Sylvia had been gradually working their way around the edges of the fight, staying behind rocks as much as they could. They had been lucky so far that all the villains had been pretty focused on fighting each other, and no one had yet noticed them.

Wander was really not a fan of all the violence. He was certain the many conquerors could work things out if they just talked to each other instead of fighting. Maybe they could all take turns with the ring or something. Hater's fight had been particularly hard to watch, and he'd almost run out to try and interfere several times, but he had promised Sylvia he'd be careful, and at least Hatey had seemed to have things relatively under control. Wander still felt like he was a little too liberal with zapping Emperor Awesome though. And it was a tad worrying how much he seemed to enjoy it.

Now, he watched as Hater hauled himself up onto the next rock ledge in his path, biting his lip worriedly. Hater really seemed focused on this ring. He wondered if this was another of Mr. Peepers' plans for domination after letting the prisoners go after their party had gotten in the way of the last one. If so, Hater seemed much more enthusiastic for this plan. It did seem to be appealing more to his dramatic sensibilities.

Wander glanced back at Sylvia, who was currently occupied watching Li'l bits face off with General McGuffin, then his eyes trailed over to Hater again.

He wanted to support Hater, but he wasn't sure the overlord getting a ring of invincibility, not to mention getting into fights with countless villains on the way, was a good idea, especially if he and Mr. Peepers were planning to use it to take over other planets. At the very least, he needed to get closer in case he had to do something. Particularly when Hater's current path was going to land him right in front of Sourdough and a whole heap on his beefeaters. They'd often been trouble for his buddy in the past.

With a silent apology to Sylvia, Wander ducked out from behind their shelter and began making his way towards that upward path, zigging and zagging around the battling villains as he did so, and going as fast as he could. He may be a little concerned about what Hater was doing, but he didn't want him to get hurt doing it, and he felt he had to find some way to help.

And if that meant showing himself and getting both villains to focus on him instead of fighting, that's what he'd have to do.

"Lord Hater! Finally made it, I see. I want to thank you for making that announcement so that the whole galaxy found out about your plan with the ring. You didn't think I'd just let you get away with it, did you?"

Hater glared. He'd been concentrating on working his way up the floating rock platforms, and he hadn't noticed the evil sandwich until he'd been nearly surrounded by beefeaters, their domed heads shining ominously. Not that he was intimidated at all, but there were an awful lot of them, and he knew from experience they were significantly hardier than the fist fighters he'd just waded through.

"You're not going to stop me, Evil Sandwich!" he declared. Though a trickle of confusion wound through him. What was the sandwich even doing here if he had found out about his plan? What did he care if Hater asked Wander to marry him?

"I beg to differ!" The sandwich jumped slightly on the plate he was resting on, olive eyes narrowing. "You thought you could get the jump on me? I know exactly what you plan to do with that ring, Lord Hater, and I'm going to do it first!"

Hater froze where he was standing, the spaces between his bones clenching unpleasantly, his skull whirling with sudden understanding. So that was it! It wasn't just Major Threat he had to contend with, but Sourdough as well.

He'd known the villain had a past with Wander. The nomad and Queen Entazoa had seemed awfully close during that fancy party, but he'd had no idea there was more to it. Did Sourdough like Wander too?

He suddenly wondered if there were others. His eyes trailed over the battle below, at the countless fighting aliens. He'd just been speculating about the effect Wander seemed to have on villains. How many more had chased the nomad enough to become obsessed with him? Were any of the others here to stop him from proposing because they liked the nomad?

At that thought, Hater's eyes narrowed. All the more reason why he had to take out the enemies surrounding him and get to the top first. How dare they, all of these lesser villains? They thought they could take Wander from him? He wouldn't let that happen. He would destroy them all! Electricity sizzled through his bones and his eyes turned red as the rage mounted.

A green glow surrounded him, lifting him off the floor in his growing fury as he stared the sandwich down. Lightning arced off him and flickered through the air.

"You think you can take what's mine?" he thundered "I will flatten you, sandwich!" The sky seemed to darken around him as he advanced and the beefeaters closed ranks around Sourdough, who blinked up at him in shock, though Hater barely noticed, too caught up in his own single-minded purpose. "I am Lord Hater!" His voice boomed off the rocks as lightning cracked around him. "And no one will get in my way!"

Hater threw himself forward, tearing his way through the first line of beefeaters, his only thoughts of reaching the evil sandwich and toasting it.

He didn't notice a small, orange figure pulling itself up onto the ledge behind him.

I hope you enjoyed the first chapter!

Hater's a little confused, poor guy.

Hopefully you all like the setup so far. We are going to have at least one more chapter on this episode, possibly two depending on how far we get next chapter. All our pieces are in place except for Dominator, and it wouldn't be The Battle Royale without her showing up. Wonder how our goofs will react to her this time?

The next update will likely be either for this story, or for The New Galaxy. I'm very inspired for both at the moment.

See you all soon!