AN: So, the story I wrote as a joke ended up getting a really positive reception, to the point where I thought about adding another chapter to it for giggles. But I decided I'd make this its own story so I could properly tag it for what it is.
I still don't know what I'd do with this set up in the long term, but usually having a foundation to start from makes it easier to plan out what I might do next. So here's the foundation, we'll see if it goes anywhere.
And I guess while I'm here, I'll respond to some reviews from the previous story.
Mr. Haziq: It's specifically using the 2019 Super Hero Girls version of Kara. So it's a crossover. I guess its loose in that I didn't really have a particular point from SHG in mind where it takes place, but SHG doesn't have a ton of continuity to begin with.
TankH04: I guess that's a route I could take. Like I said, I don't really know what, if anything I'm doing with this. Glad you liked it though.
364wii: Then I tricked you. I tricked you good! YOU FELL VICTIM TO MY RUSE!
Brave2000: Well, good, glad you liked that. Maybe I'll end up doing more of that.
Zexo87: Thank you.
SonicMax: Right? I mean, it's thoroughly a crackship, but I had fun writing them. Kara's kind of what you get when Lori and Lynn do the fusion dance.
Also, ffnet is being a butt right now with story uploads, so if you're looking for stability check out the story at AO3, where I cross-post all my stuff.
Sweet Justice, a name that perfectly encapsulated the eatery that bore the name. Not only was it one of Metropolis' premier dessert dispensaries, but unbeknownst to its proprietors, Sweet Justice frequently enjoyed the patronage of six of the city's greatest super heroines—six super heroines who, at this very moment, were exercising that patronage while incognito.
Or...at least as incognito as superheroes could be when they almost exclusively hung out together and each of them defaulted to civilian clothing that strongly evoked their respective alter egos.
The super sextet was currently engaged in their traditional after-school ritual; regrouping at Sweet Justice and collectively downing enough sweets to brighten the mood of every dentist for miles. For a time, the only sound that could be heard from their table was the sound of teeth gnashing upon treats both frozen and frosted. But eventually, sufficient quantities of sugar had been consumed to dull any lingering effects from that day's foray with education. And front that contentment, flowed conversation.
"So, Kara," Barbara asked, momentarily ceasing her consumption of a rather large milkshake, which closer inspection would reveal to actually be seven different milkshakes nested within one another. "How'd things go with your sidekick?"
"Muh whuf wow?" Kara asked, her face emerging from a bowl of ice cream that could double as a modestly sized planter. Putting her Kryptonian mouth and neck muscles to the task, she heroically swallowed the mouthful of frozen dairy that was obstructing her speech and tried again. "My what now?"
"The plucky young ward you mentor and battle side by side with," The redhead clarified, punching at the air for emphasis. However, Kara's uncomprehending expression remained unchanged.
"She's talking about Lincoln," Jessica added, prompting a nod of affirmation from Barbara. "You weren't around yesterday, but you showed up at school today no worse for wear. So if you weren't captured, and you weren't incapacitated, and you weren't with us, that leaves a very short list of people you would have been with. Which pretty much begins and ends with—"
"Lincoln!" Barbara exclaimed. "Your sidekick!"
A little further down the table, a statuesque girl tilted her head quizzically. "Why would Kara kick young Lincoln in the side? Are they not comrades?"
"Not what that means, Diana," Kara replied, before turning her back to the jittery redhead. "And that isn't anything like what we do. We fight robots together."
"To be fair," Offered a small, soft-spoken girl in a bumblebee-patterned sweater. "That does sound like the kind of thing you do with a sidekick."
"Batman fights robots all the time with his sidekicks!" Barbara added. "Probably!"
"Not evil robots, Karen!" Kara groaned, shooting the sweatered girl a look that caused her mouth to clamp shut.
"Calm down, Kara," Interjected a fashionably dressed girl between dainty bites of her own dessert. "Babs is just messing with you."
"Eeeeeeh, fifty-fifty, Zee," The girl in question corrected her, shaking her hand side-to-side. "Because its never not going to be funny that Kara Danvers spent so much time with the same guy, that she became champion of that toy robot game."
"Local champion," Kara interjected, elongating the "L" for emphasis. "And of another city. But we're gunning for regionals next."
"...But," Barbara continued, undeterred. "It's also a fact that hanging out with Lincoln makes Kara a lot more...hmm, what's the word I'm looking for?"
"Approachable?" Jessica suggested.
"Less destructive?" Diana put forth.
"Frrrrrrrriendly?" Karen offered.
Kara looked at each of her friends in turn.
"Hurtful," She said, jamming her spoon into her ice cream and crossing her arms irritably.
"But true," said Babs, nodding with approval. "Which is so weird, considering how you guys met..."
Some ambiguous period of time between six months and a year and a half earlier…
"Are you seriously going to tell us a story that literally everyone here was around for?" Kara deadpanned.
Barbara paused to consider this, before opening her mouth to reply…
Some ambiguous period of time between six months and a year and a half earlier, the group collectively known as the Super Hero Girls were sitting in the exact same positions at the exact same table, which was loaded down by an equally dense, but different variety of sweets.
"That test was AWFUL!" Zee groaned, rubbing her fists against her bleary eyes. "I still see numbers when I close my eyes!"
"See, that right there is your problem," Kara replied, as she eagerly eyed a sundae that looked like it was sized for someone three times her height. "Because as soon as the test is over, I stop worrying about it. That's Future Kara's problem."
"You're going to become her eventually," Jessica said, wearily.
"Eventually," The blonde agreed. "But right now, all I care about is stuffing my face. Because Present Kara is so hungry, she could eat a—"
"Horse!" Someone shouted.
Kara scowled and began squirming in her seat, trying to turn around and see who had stolen her thunder. And it was because of this momentary distraction that she failed to notice the expressions on her friends' faces, ranging from puzzlement to outright shock, as a large shape darkened the doorway of Sweet Justice. By the time her enhanced sense picked up on the telltale sound of glass beginning to buckle, the doors to the restaurant were already in the process of being torn from their hinges, bursting inward as a horse charged through the entryway, whinnying loudly. Before anyone could react, the beast began to slide, its legs flailing as it tried to balance upon the slippery tiled flooring, before it abruptly arrested its own movement by rearing up and slamming its forelegs into the ground, its hooves smashing through the delicate surface, which had the added effect of sending whatever it was that had been mounting the beast flying off its back, and rocketing across the room. And thus relieved of its burden, the horse awkwardly turned itself around and trampled back out into the street.
Very little of which had been observed by the six girls, whose attentions had been drawn to the line of destruction that had been drawn across their table, scattering most of the desserts that had been sitting upon upon the tabletop only moments earlier. And the source of that destruction; a young boy with snow-white hair. Which could barely be seen, because his face was planted firmly in Kara's ample cleavage.
A moment of silence passed as the inhabitants of the restaurant collectively processed that rapid-fire series of events. Then, someone stood up.
"Well," said Barbara, a giant grin on her face. "Kara may have lost her sundae. But that kid just got TWO SCOOPS!"
"We were there, Babs," Zee interjected with a roll of her eyes. "You did not make that quip."
"I would have thrown you into the sun if you had," Kara added. "Zero hesitation. Zero regrets."
"Well...yeah," The redhead admitted, shrugging indifferently. "But adding it gave the story a natural transition point, which makes it better!"
"Hard disagree," Kara retorted, scowling.
"Yeah well…"
A while later, a semblance of order had been restored. And as a lone Sweet Justice employee frantically swept up the rubble that used to be the restaurant's front door, at speeds that only approached superhuman, the girls had once again situated themselves at their favorite table, now freshly laden with sweets. But it was not this sugary bounty that currently held their attention, because that was on the new arrival that had quite literally been tossed into their midst.
Seated on a chair that had been appropriated from elsewhere and added to the table, Lincoln stared at the ice cream cone that was currently clutched in his hands. A scoop of orange sherbet topped with a scoop of vanilla. He hadn't asked for it. He'd never even tried this combination of flavors before, someone had just handed it to him, and now it was apparently his. He might have remarked upon this, but every time he lifted his head, his gaze inevitably crossed that of the blonde girl who had...caught...him and a flush of embarrassment would compel him to avert his eyes. Staring at this strangely familiar-looking ice cream cone seemed to be his safest bet until circumstances changed.
And mercifully, they did, as the tall blue-haired girl seated next to him suddenly cleared her throat, causing the boy to glance at her out of the corner of his eye.
"Friends," She began, standing up and looking around the table. "I'm going to say what I believe we're all thinking."
Heedless of the puzzled glances that were exchanged across the table, she whirled around, and suddenly Lincoln found himself to be the focus of her attention.
"Young man!" She said, startling him as she sharply rapped her knuckles on the tabletop. "I understand your intentions. In fact, I respect them. But there is a time and a place for such things!"
To his surprise, Lincoln found his spine straightening, his natural slouch correcting itself as he sat up in his seat in a manner akin to a puppet being pulled by its strings. Something about the girl's voice just compelled him to present himself better.
But somewhere amid his brain's attempt to interpret those confusing signals, the girl's words registered with him.
"My...intentions?" He asked, tilting his head in confusion.
"Of course," The girl replied, matter-of-factly. "They are plain for all to see."
"The demonstration of your equestrian skills," She continued, gesturing at the ruined entryway. "Followed by your assault on our friend Kara. Obviously, you were trying to court her."
For a moment, all Lincoln could smell was the scent of burning toast as his brain rebooted.
"C-court her?" He asked, looking around at the other girls. Fortunately, they seemed to be as bewildered as he was.
"Diana," Said a tanned girl dressed entirely in green. "That's not what happened." In response, she received a snort of derision.
"Please," Diana scoffed, rolling her eyes. "I was two hundred, once. I know what a courtship ritual looks like."
"Two hundred?" Lincoln mouthed at the green-clad girl, who had suddenly started avoiding his gaze.
"And you performed most admirably!" Diana continued, turning back to him. "Not only did you manage to skillfully maneuver your steed in such close confines, but you also disabled Kara in a single strike! You possess a warrior's spirit that far exceeds your tiny size!"
Now the blonde was glowering at him. He wasn't sure this was an improvement to his situation.
"But there are rules to such things!" Diana said, sternly. "Surely you know that you must present a formal challenge to your intended? And to do so here, in such a public place? Pure, reckless folly! Had you not defeated Kara so skillfully—!"
"Hey!" Shouted Kara, bristling at the interpretation of events.
"—she would have retaliated. And a clash between warriors of your caliber would have undoubtedly put the lives of everyone here at risk!"
Diana reached out and placed one comforting hand on his shoulder. "I understand the eagerness of the young, but you must think before you act, young warrior. Do you understand?"
"I...do?" Lincoln replied, giving the table a hapless shrug. "And I'm...sorry."
He turned his attention to the still-irate-looking blonde girl.
"I'm really. Really sorry."
He may have been imagining things, but it seemed like her expression softened at his words.
"Well done," Diana said, giving him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "That humility is a good quality. It will serve you well in the battles to come."
With that, she retook her seat and immediately began eating from a stack of heavily frosted cupcakes.
"Ssssssoooooo," Began the purple-haired girl sitting on the other side of the table. "What's the actual story, kid?"
Diana rolled her eyes, then motioned to Lincoln. "Humor her," she seemed to be saying.
"Err, right," said Lincoln. "Well, I'm not from here. My class is visiting Metropolis for a field trip. Only, I got separated from my group, and I've been trying to find my way back to them."
"What about the horse?" Queried a red-headed girl wearing a really cool-looking bat hoodie.
"Couldn't tell you," Lincoln replied, wincing. "It's been...kind of a weird day."
There was a moment of silence as the occupants of the table collectively glanced at the doorway.
"...Those tend to happen around here," The girl in green said, diplomatically. "Do you know where your class is now?"
"Hang on," Lincoln muttered, as he felt around in his pockets. A moment later he produced a crumpled sheet of paper, which he then placed on the table.
"We were at the Lex Corp building," He said, trying to smooth out the paper. "But according to our itinerary, I think we're supposed to be at...the Metropolis Public Library right now. Any chance any of you could give me directions?"
"...I can help you out."
To his surprise, it was the blonde girl who had answered.
This was followed by an amused snort from the purple-haired girl.
"Really, Kara?" She asked. "When was the last time you went to the library?"
"Har har," Kara replied sarcastically. Then she stood up and made her way over to where Lincoln was sitting.
"Got a pen, kid?" She asked as she flipped the paper over to its blank backside. Lincoln nodded and produced one from his pocket. Kara took it from him and began scribbling on the page. A few moments later, she held up the paper, holding it out to the other girl and sticking her tongue out at her, before placing it back down in front of Lincoln.
To his surprise, he found himself looking at a crude, but fairly detailed drawing of the surrounding area.
"Wow," Lincoln said, looking up at her. "You must really know the city."
"Yeah, well...I...spend a lot of time looking at maps," Kara replied. "Come on, I'll walk you there."
Without waiting for him to respond, Kara immediately started off towards the doorway. Lincoln gave the remaining girls a grateful nod, before scrambling to his feet and running after her.
"So what's your name, kid?" Kara asked as the pair exited the restaurant.
"It's Lincoln," He said. "Lincoln Loud."
"Huh," she replied. "Weird name. Well, I'm Kara. Kara Danvers."
"And that's how you guys met!" Barbara concluded with a theatrical bow. What followed was a deafening silence, as her friends simply stared back at her.
"Again," Kara deadpanned. "We were there."
"...Why did you switch the second part to Lincoln's perspective?" Zee asked, frowning in confusion. "That was a weird inconsistency."
"And how do you know what he was thinking?" Karen added.
"I thought it made the story flow better," Barbara replied. "And, uh...artistic license?"
Her response was a chorus of groans.
"Alright, alright," The redhead grumbled, as she turned her attention back to her dessert. "Sheesh. Everyone's a critic."