Chapter 9 – Exile

Author's Note: I'll be posting chapters every other week from now on. :)

~ Amina Gila

Once Anakin and Obi-Wan have treated each other's injuries, they, Padme, and Reva all rendezvous with Senator Bail Organa, who is the one who picked up Yoda from the Senate. They get together in a conference room on Bail's personal starship to discuss the future. With most of the Jedi dead or on the run, and with Palpatine having survived, the utmost concern is what to do next. It's not an easy question to answer, not when the only real answer, hiding, feels more like running away than anything else.

And more than that, Anakin knows that he can't do what he wants most. He can't go into hiding with Padme and their child, not when Palpatine will be after him. When the Sith Master comes for him, he refuses to be the reason that other people get injured or worse. More than that, he doesn't want his family's deaths on his head. They will not die because of him.

"Failed we have," Yoda states, summing up the situation perfectly, albeit in depressing terms. "Into exile we must go."

He's not wrong.

"Master Yoda is right," Anakin agrees quietly, looking at the child at his side. Reva is silent, but he can feel her fear curling into the Force. Her fear and her anger.

He probes at her lightly, and she doesn't resist him. She's angry and bitter and hurting. She lost so much in such a short amount of time, and after having lived in such a sheltered life at the Temple, she is struggling to reconcile it, not to mention that it happened so brutally. Reva needs help, help that she cannot get from any Jedi. She is being drawn to the Dark Side, and while she is fighting it right now, at some point, Anakin fears that her growing desire for vengeance will get the better of her unless she learns how to control herself.

Anakin does not trust himself with anyone right now, but he can try for Reva. He held himself back from attacking Sidious and Inquiere in the Temple because of her, and he can force himself to learn control for her, too. She needs him, needs his help, and he knows how dangerous it will be, but he doesn't want to send her out into the galaxy on her own, not when she's struggling and grieving so much. Reva needs stability, and she trusts him. He rescued her, saved her life, and he feels as if he owes her this much, at least.

Perhaps if he takes care of her, trains her, gives her a life, he can somehow make up for how he's failed, for all the people he has already failed.

"Where will we go?" Obi-Wan queries, looking to Anakin.

Anakin feels a sharp pang in his chest when he catches the look and realizes what it means. Obi-Wan thinks that they will go into exile together, and truly, he would like nothing more. He would love to have Obi-Wan at his side as they navigate this difficult part of their lives. But… he will not put Obi-Wan in that kind of danger.

"I think we need to split up," he tells him, shaking his head, trying to convey his regret with his expression, and with a touch through the Force. He doesn't know how to express it aloud, how to tell Obi-Wan how much he loves him, how much he wants to stay with him without being castigated for those feelings, for this attachment. Instead, he buries it, tries to focus on the rest of his family, on Padme and their child. They are what matter now, no matter how much he loves Obi-Wan, no matter how much he will always seek his approval and acceptance and love.

"Why?" Obi-Wan demands, clearly unhappy. "It would make sense for us to stay together. Sidious will be looking for you, and –"

"Exactly," Anakin interrupts. "Master, I will not put you at risk like that. When he comes for me, he will not be able to use you against me. Besides, I need you to watch over Padme and our child, if you can, if it is safe. I need you to do that for me. I cannot be there for them –" Padme makes a quiet, choked sound at that, but he doesn't look at her, doesn't look away from Obi-Wan's eyes, willing him to understand, "– so I would like for you to be there. Please, Master. Protect them."

Obi-Wan hesitates before he finally nods. "I will," he promises.

"Why must you go alone?" Padme sounds upset, and Anakin can feel her distress bleeding into the Force.

"I will take Reva with me," he answers. "She needs my help. I would – Padme, believe me, I want nothing more than to go somewhere safe with you, but I cannot. It would be too dangerous for you, for our child." In front of the others, Anakin will say nothing more, but he knows that Padme will understand, even if she doesn't like it.

After a long moment, she nods.

"Then decided it has been," Yoda states.

"May the Force be with us all," Obi-Wan murmurs, and the sentiment hangs heavily over their heads for a moment, and they all think about the enormity of what is to come.

"Senator," Anakin says, turning to Bail, "I saw Grievous' starfighter on your ship. May I take it?" It would not be the most ideal, but it's a starfighter, and if he is pursued, it will be easier for him to escape if he has a fighter. It's bigger than the Jedi starfighters, so Reva should be able to sit on Anakin's lap, though it will be a little uncomfortable. They can make it work. These are difficult times, after all.

"Of course," Bail agrees instantly, "And rest assured that I will do my utmost to see to the safety of Padme and your child."

They are not friends, exactly, but they are… acquainted, and Anakin cannot say how much he appreciates Bail's words. "I appreciate it. So much."

They nod to one another, before everyone rises, ready to part ways. But first, Anakin needs to bid his goodbyes to Obi-Wan and Padme. Leaving them will hurt but staying with them and knowing that they are hurt because of him will be even worse. This is not forever.

He talks to Padme first.

"I don't like this," she confesses in a whisper, and he wraps his arms around her, holding her body pressed against his, memorizing the feel of it, lest he never get the chance again. He is certain that he will, that they will get their forever, their family, but it will not be yet. "I don't want to leave you. I don't want you to be gone."

"It will be okay," Anakin answers with as much conviction as he can muster, as though he can will it to be true merely by stating it. "This is not forever, Padme. I do not like it, either, but I will do anything to protect you, to protect our child." He presses a hand to her stomach, feeling the kick from inside. "Anything," he repeats.

She nods, tears in her eyes, though she struggles to hold them in. It kills him to see her in pain, but better her tears than her funeral. If he keeps telling himself that, maybe it will hurt a little less. This – it feels like he's being gutted. Repeatedly. But he doesn't know what else to do, either. This is the only path that he sees ahead of him and given how easily he lost control when confronting Palpatine, he doesn't trust himself to be around his family right now.

"I will take a leave and go to Naboo, have the baby there," she tells him, a wistful look of longing flickering through her dark brown eyes. "My parents can take care of him, keep him safe. I will remain in the Senate and see what I can do politically."

Fear seizes him in its bitter grip, and he can't help but tense. "Please," he all but begs, "Please, Padme, be careful. I cannot lose you."

"You won't," she promises, lifting her chin, fire in her eyes. "Palpatine will regret the day he thought to make an Empire. He will regret what he has done. I will make him." She looks so fierce, so determined, that Anakin finds that he believes her. For a moment, he can see a little girl, a spitting image of Padme with the same fire in her eyes. His daughter. Their daughter. He blinks, and the image is gone, but the impression remains. He has no doubt that their child will be a girl.

"Make sure she knows how much I love her," he requests, still touching her belly.

"I will tell him every day," Padme smiles.

Anakin huffs out a strained laugh, leaning forward and kissing her, gently, tenderly. It's a goodbye. It's not a permanent one – he will not let it be – but it is still a goodbye, and it could be a long time before they meet again. "My heart is yours," he vows.

Padme's smile reaches her eyes, but it's not enough to drive away the heartbreak of their goodbye. "And mine is yours."

They don't let it drag out, and Anakin goes to Obi-Wan after that, knowing that this is something he is really not ready for, something he will never be ready for. Obi-Wan…

Anakin's feelings towards his former master are complicated, to say the least, but Obi-Wan has been the one constant in Anakin's life ever since he came to Coruscant. No matter how upsetting he has found Obi-Wan over the years, he has always been there. Always. The idea of being without him for an indefinite period of time is terrifying, and he has no idea how he'll ever do it. But he has to do it.

He has to.

He will not let Obi-Wan be hurt because of him.

They look at each other, meeting each other's eyes, a look saying more than words probably ever could. I love you, Anakin thinks a little desperately. "Do not do anything stupid," he finally manages, smirking slightly, "I will not be there to rescue you."

Obi-Wan fixes him with a stern look. "I do not need you to rescue me, Anakin. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

And it's not until that, that Anakin realizes that Obi-Wan doesn't want this either. His expression is too… forced, and his shielding is too strong. He's hiding, hiding his feelings, and Anakin wishes he could find a way to push Obi-Wan until he lets loose, but that desire fades just as fast. He's exhausted with the push-pull relationship they have. He's tired of Obi-Wan's attitude for all that he loves him. He will never stop loving him. He can't. It's impossible, but he also wants – he wants…

He doesn't know, can't properly put it into words.

All he does know is that he wants to cry very badly, but he swallows those tears back, because if he starts crying, he'll never be able to stop. If he falters now, he'll shatter. "Ten times," he reminds pointedly.

"Nine," Obi-Wan grumbles.

"It is still too many for me to be comfortable," Anakin snips back, because in truth, he is afraid that, without his presence, Obi-Wan will get himself in trouble and have no one who can help him, who can rescue him.

But they are only putting off the inevitable and dragging it out won't make it hurt any less.

Still, Anakin doesn't know what to even say to the man who means more to him than anyone in this entire galaxy. Obi-Wan is a part of him. When apart, he is only half a person. Do you love me? he wants to ask. Was I more to you than an obligation? Do you feel anything more for me than you do for anyone? He can't ask that, though, any more than he ever can.

"Be careful," Obi-Wan finally says. "You have a target on your back more than any of us. You are in the most danger. Don't do anything rash."

"I won't do anything you would not do," Anakin offers cheekily.

"Such gratitude you give me after everything I have done for you," he grouses, but his eyes are fond, so Anakin knows not to take it seriously.

He feels so much right now that he doesn't know what to say, and he can't act on his impulse to hug Obi-Wan. To Anakin's surprise, Obi-Wan reaches out suddenly and clasps his shoulder. He leans into the touch slightly, trying not to be obvious about it, feeling surprised and caught off guard, wondering what could be behind this highly irregular contact that could almost be comfort. Obi-Wan touches him so rarely – and never hugs him – that Anakin has learned to savor each and every moment.

"If you die," Obi-Wan says finally, with an undertone of something that Anakin would think was fear if he didn't know better, "I will bring you back to life and give you a lecture that you will never, ever forget. I mean it."

Anakin raises an eyebrow at him. "Yes, okay. I could say the same to you."

Obi-Wan chuckles, but it sounds strained. "I don't suppose you'll tell me what your planned destination is?"

"I have not fully decided," he answers truthfully, "But even if I had, I do not think it would be safe for either of us. The less we know, the better."

He nods, and there's a flicker of something like resignation in his eyes, but Anakin doesn't push, doesn't know how he even could ask Obi-Wan what he's really thinking, much less feeling. "May the Force be with you," Obi-Wan replies, stepping back, and Anakin instantly misses the warm, familiar, comforting weight of his hand.

"And with you, Master."

He forces himself to turn away from Obi-Wan and beckon to Reva as they walk towards the waiting starfighter together. Anakin slides inside, situating himself, before helping Reva settle in his lap. It is awkward, because she's kind of… big, but he can still reach the controls, so he supposes it will have to do.

Anakin does not look back at Padme, at Obi-Wan. He does not look back at the family he is leaving behind while he heads into the unknown, while they all head into the unknown. He will see them again. He will. Maybe it will be years, but they will meet again. They must.

If he looks back, he will hesitate, and his courage will flag. Never before has he done something on his own, something without another person there to guide him. It terrifies him, this – this… independence. Is this what freedom means? If it is, he doesn't know how much he likes it. It is wrong, foreign, lonely. It's not who he is. It's not where he's meant to be.

Anakin Skywalker does not look back as he fires up the engines of the starfighter that once belonged to General Grievous. He does not look back as he flies out into the blackness of space and towards the future that awaits him.

**w**

Sidious is seething as he paces – storms, more accurately – back and forth across the ruined floor of what was once his office. In a rare show of temper, he waves his hand, crashing the broken desk into the wall and sending splinters flying. Rarely has he ever been so angry, but then again, rarely has he ever come so close to dying. That is an unacceptable outcome.

This is not okay. This is very not okay.

His throat throbs painfully, but he ignores it; pain is power.

None of this should have happened this way. None of it. He had been so certain that he could get Skywalker on his side, that he had, perhaps, overlooked how strong the boy would be. He had been too confident in his manipulations to realize how far the boy has already Fallen. He knew, of course, that Skywalker would come to him to try and kill him, and he had thought that he had been adequately prepared.

The boy would come, and when he did, he would walk into the trap. Sidious would spring it, would use the boy's wild, uncontrolled emotions to get into his head, and he would twist it. It would have been so easy to deepen the fractures in his mind enough to dig in and hold onto it. What he had not accounted for was Skywalker to have Fallen so far and to have mustered enough control that made any form of mind-control impossible. The boy truly meant to kill, and he was too angry to be controlled.

Sidious has but one option left. Skywalker must die. It will be a regrettable loss, but it's one he can work with. After all, the boy's unborn child could make a wonderful apprentice. If not, there is still the… other. He will have to wait, however, because a newborn cannot be made into a Sith. In the meantime, while he waits, perhaps he should try out his mind-manipulation technique on someone else. It's best not to leave anything to chance.

Not after last time.

At the end, he has still emerged the winner in this game. His life is not a small victory, not when he came so close to losing it.

**w**

In the center of the room that was once the Council chambers, Inquiere kneels. In his hands, he holds the two kyber crystals from his lightsaber, and he keeps his eyes closed as he pours his anger and hatred into them, bleeding them to red.

His new lightsaber will be different. He will design it so that he will never suffer the same fate again. Nearly falling to his death once was enough, and his weapon can, perhaps, double as something else. If it can spin fast enough, it may be enough to stop the same thing from happening once more.

Skywalker caught him off-guard.

Inquiere will not make the same mistake twice. He is a Sith now, and he will be strong. He will gain power, and perhaps, in time… he can become even stronger yet. He will make Skywalker regret his decision to decline Sidious' offer to make him his apprentice.

The title Emperor Inquiere has a nice ring to it.

But that's not what he wants most. He wants to find Skywalker and kill him. He wants to serve his Emperor and become the most powerful – more like second-most – powerful being in the galaxy. He wants to rewrite the pages of history so that he will long be remembered in the future. He wants to be the best, strongest Sith he possibly can be.

And he's already started down that path by destroying the Jedi.

When Inquiere ignites his newly-built lightsaber, it works exactly as he had hoped. It is a weapon, but it is also more than that. It will be his salvation, his escape if a battle gets too hard. With it, he can fly.

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