Chapter 17 – Family
Author's Note: We're almost done with the first act of the book. It's a little hard to believe. Lol. I hope that y'all enjoy all the fluffy bonding in this chapter! :D
~ Amina Gila
For many long minutes, Anakin just holds Reva close to him, as close as he can with his armor, relaxing in the warmth and brightness and nearness of her Force presence. He could have lost her. She could have been sold into slavery like he was, or handed over to the Empire, and he might never have seen her again.
But that didn't happen. He rescued her in time, saved her, and it's all over now.
"Come," he says to her at last, shifting, and hoisting her up his arms, his prosthetic gripping her so she doesn't fall, "Let's go home." She doesn't seem phased by the way his vocoder alters his voice, clinging to him physically and through their bond as he carries her from the dungeon.
No one stops him as he walks through the palace – no one is there to stop him anymore – and when he gets outside, it's to the brightness of the twin suns, the first time he's shown himself in public during the day. He'll worry about the consequences later, and what it could mean for him. Right now, what matters most is that Reva is safe.
Aayla is out there, along with the slaves who were in the palace, and with them are Kitster and Wald, and some other members of the Trail. For a moment, everyone stands there staring at Anakin, at the child in his arms, but Reva doesn't lift her head, though she must be aware of the scrutiny.
"You have done what we have sought to do for years," Kitster says at last, stepping forward. "We have a chance to have a free planet now, thanks to you."
"Think nothing of it," he replies, tightening his grip on Reva. "It needed to be done."
And once he's had time to rest, and once Reva has had time to recover, he will need to think about his next moves very carefully. He cannot afford to make any mistakes, and the power vacuum that will be left in the wake of Jabba's death is… massive. Everyone will be clamoring to claim it, even if Fortuna gets it first, and if they don't do something, they could end up with a tyrant just as awful as Jabba was, if not worse. If the Empire is called in to find the Shadow…
No, that cannot happen. It would be a disaster for everyone, and Anakin owes it to the slaves on this planet who he has freed to protect them from re-enslavement.
He turns to Aayla then, who is carrying both lightaxes that she obviously took from the dead Gamorrean guards. "Come with us," he says to her. "We need to leave."
She obeys without asking any questions, the cloak from the bounty hunter still pulled around her body. Anakin leads her to where he hid his speeder, climbing on and settling Reva on his lap so he can still grasp the controls before nodding to Aayla. She swings on behind him, holding the lightaxes carefully and wrapping her arms around his waist so she doesn't fall off.
With them secure, Anakin fires up the engine and flies away, back to the Lars homestead.
It's a long flight, and they don't arrive until mid-afternoon. The suns are beating down on them relentlessly, and Anakin is glad to be there. Even with the modifications in his armor so it'll somewhat thermoregulate, it's hot, and he can't imagine how Reva and Aayla must be feeling.
Owen and Beru, the latter of whom has her shoulder bandaged, come out of the homestead to greet them even before they've gotten off the speeder. Beru scoops Reva into a hug, fussing over her, asking if she's okay and so on, while Owen comes to Anakin.
"I'm glad you're safe," says Owen, taking Anakin by surprise when he gives him a brief embrace. "I heard the news. It must be everywhere by now, talk of how the Shadow killed Jabba. The rumors are really flying."
"We'll need to deal with it somehow," Anakin replies, pulling off his helmet and tucking it under his arm. Introductions first. "This is Aayla Secura," he says to Owen and Beru, "She was a good friend when we were Jedi. And these are Owen and Beru Lars, my stepbrother and his wife, and Reva Sevander, a youngling I rescued when I escaped from the Temple."
Beru, with a hand on Reva's shoulder, approaches Aayla, taking in her state of dress with a quick glance. "Come with me," she offers. "I have some clothes that will fit you. You're more than welcome to stay with us; it's not as though we don't have Jedi here already."
"I would appreciate that," Aayla replies, and she follows Beru back into the homestead, still clutching the lightaxes.
Reva sticks close to Anakin while he puts the speeder away and removes his armor, piling it in a corner of the garage, deciding to take it back to its proper hiding spot later. He leaves Dooku's lightsaber with it, before taking Reva into the cool interior of the homestead so they can get drinks; staying hydrated is very important on Tatooine, after all.
"What happened when they came?" Anakin asks her gently as they settle onto a bench, Reva curling against his side. She hasn't spoken a whole lot, hasn't had a chance to, either, and Anakin knows that she probably needs to talk about it. He helped Ahsoka when she struggled after difficult missions, and he can help Reva with this, too.
"I felt the danger," she tells him, resting her head on his shoulder, "And I told Owen and Beru. They told me to run if it got… bad. I – I tried escaping through the window –" which was something they'd done drills for, should the Empire ever find them unexpectedly, "– But there was someone there, and he saw me. They stopped me, and Beru tried to stop them from taking me. They tried to shoot her, and I used to Force to push her out of the way. Then, they took me."
It makes him so angry to hear it, angry at the injustice of it all, of the way they hadn't even cared not to hurt a child or kill an innocent. But Jabba is dead now, and his reign is over. It's all over. They're safe now, or they will be if they make a move to liberate Tatooine while they still have a chance. It's something they'll have to plan out very carefully, and Anakin knows that he won't be able to do it alone. He'll need help if he is to succeed.
"You're okay now," he promises her, smoothing back her hair and wrapping an arm around her shoulders, tucking her close. "They're all gone."
"Is it bad that I'm glad you killed them?" Reva asks quietly.
If they were still Jedi, Anakin would be obligated to give her a lecture about the Code, and about how they should not let themselves feel satisfaction when being victorious over opponents, when defeating and killing them. But they are not Jedi, and she is only a child. "It is natural," he says instead, "To feel that way. Your feelings are not wrong. In time, you will understand. They hurt you, and it is normal to feel relief when something that hurt or scared you has been destroyed."
It's something of a simplified answer, but it's one that seems to satisfy her nevertheless.
She's quiet for a few moments, and Anakin can sense the way she's thinking something over, before she tentatively queries, "can I ask you something?"
"Always," he answers, "Anything."
"I – can – can I call you 'dad'?"
It takes him off-guard abruptly, that she would even want to, and he can't breathe past the wave of emotions that crashes into him, choking him, and he blinks away the tears that instinctively rise. She is – everything to him. Everything. She is the only one he has here, the only one who is keeping him grounded and stable, his lifeline amidst all of this. If he didn't have her, he doesn't know where he would be.
"Of course, dear one, if that is what you want," he replies when he's certain that his voice will be level, no matter how much he suddenly wants to cry. What did he ever do to deserve a child like this? He had thought he could help her at first, when he took her, but he's seeing more and more that they're helping each other.
I love you, he thinks, but he doesn't know how to say it to her when she's been raised a Jedi, even if they've been together for months. He hadn't expected her to become his in the same way Ahsoka is, in the same way his own blood child is, the child he has yet to meet. Instead of saying the words, he pulls her closer, pressing a kiss to her head and holding her, letting her feel his affection for her through their bond.
She's his child, and they're family, and Anakin wouldn't want it any other way.
**w**
Reva is very clingy the rest of the day, sticking next to him, hardly even straying more than a few feet away, and it's very similar to the way she was at the beginning. He doesn't mind though. To the contrary, it relieves him to have her within arm's reach at all times, especially after nearly losing her so abruptly.
He's under no delusions that it could have gone badly, very badly.
He doesn't see Aayla again for a couple hours after Beru takes her, and he knows that she needs the time to recover and recenter herself. She's been through a very trying ordeal, and it won't be easy for her to heal. When she comes back, she follows Beru around, not saying much, though he exchanges glances with her many times, and he can see in her eyes the same thing that he feels: they need to talk, preferably once Reva isn't there.
Some things, she is too young to hear.
They get their chance that evening, once Reva has fallen asleep, the ordeal of the previous night finally catching up to her, her exhaustion pulling her under. "Don't go," she whispers to Anakin, curled in his lap – she'd refused to go to bed, insistent on staying with him while he talks to Owen and Beru in quiet voices about the state of affairs on Tatooine.
"I'm staying right here," he promises, lifting her into his arms as he finally takes her to her room. "I'm not leaving for anywhere tonight." It wouldn't be safe anyway, with so many people undoubtedly after the Shadow. Besides, he's tired too, and he knows when it's best not to push himself.
She snuggles closer, pouting when he gently pries her grip off, situating her on her bed and tucking her in, brushing a hair back from her face as he lingers. "'kay," she murmurs, mostly sleeping already, "G'night, dad."
Anakin feels an overwhelming fondness and affection for her sweep over him, and he squeezes her hand before straightening. "Sleep well, little one," he answers. "I'm only a room away."
By the time he leaves, she's already asleep.
"She's sleeping," he says as he reenters the room where the others are, his eyes meeting Aayla's as he gestures to her. "We can talk outside."
She follows him, and they climb onto the roof together, just sitting there and staring out into the darkness of the desert, thousands of stars overhead, the light of the three moons shining down on them. It feels strangely peaceful, empty in the way the desert always is. Once, Anakin feared the wildness of it, but now, it soothes him. He has a complicated history with Tatooine – it's brought him so many joys and sorrows – but it is still his home, and even if he can't say he's glad to be here, he's… not discontented either.
There is so much for them to talk about, but Anakin hardly knows where to begin. He feels like a completely different person from the one she knew, and it's – it's been so many months since they've been together physically, as opposed to brief conversations over holos. "What happened to you," he asks her finally, "When the Purge began?"
"I was on Felucia," she answers, wrapping her arms around herself. She's wearing one of Beru's dresses, and even if it's a little small on her, it's not even half as revealing as her previous outfit was. "It – it happened so fast," she continues, a tendril of grief escaping through her shields into the Force. "I sensed it, their intention to fire, and I – I was able to react in time. I –" Her voice wavers, and Anakin leans towards her, bumping their shoulders together to offer her comfort, "I ended up killing some of them when I deflected the blaster bolts as I tried to escape. I'm not sure if Bly survived or not. I don't understand how they could have done that. I always protected them when I was able, but…" She trails off, her emotions a mess of grief, pain, and betrayal.
"It was not their fault," Anakin tells her quietly. "If you remember, Fives had… found something. Inhibitor chips. The Council and Chancellor agreed with the Kaminoans findings, and I saw no reason to question their assessment. The clones were programmed; they had those things implanted into them which forced them to obey. It was not their fault." Sometimes, he thinks of Appo, and how he'd killed him, and he feels sick with guilt. It wasn't his fault. And Anakin killed him anyway – even if he hadn't known, at the time.
Aayla sucks in a sharp breath, horror flaring outward, and he can only imagine how she must be feeling, not too dissimilar from how he did when he realized it. She has always worked to protect the clones when she could, he knows, and she was a good General. She cared for her men deeply, even if not as strongly as Anakin did his own; he doesn't think any Jedi was as fiercely protective of the clones as he was, and he knows it's because he's never been the Jedi he should have been. Once, he would have felt shame at that, or regret, but now, it is merely another fact to him. The time of the Jedi is over, and it was not their way that helped him survive all this time.
"I escaped Felucia," she continues after a moment, pulling her knees up and resting her chin on her crossed arms, "And I wandered for a short time before pirates got the jump on me. They realized I was a Jedi, but because – because I'm a Twi'lek, they sold me to Jabba instead of collecting the bounty on Jedi which the Empire has put out."
Because I'm a Twi'lek, she says, and he can only imagine how her species has affected her life and choices. Twi'leks are heavily sought after as slaves, especially female ones. "And then Jabba got you," Anakin states quietly.
"Yeah," she replies, "He got me around a month ago, and he thought that I'd be more… obedient. His last slave girl tried to kill him, apparently, and he probably figured I'd be grateful that I wasn't handed over to the Empire or some such nonsense."
"You are safe now," he tells her firmly because he thinks it needs to be said. "I imagine it wasn't… easy there."
She looks away. "It could have been worse. They never really… hurt me much. They just… said things, talked about it." Her lekku twitch as a shudder runs through her body, and Anakin hesitantly reaches out, touching her shoulder lightly.
"It's okay." His voice is quiet, distant, his mind drifting off to memories he's always tried to keep buried. "I – I understand. You do not need to speak of it if it's too hard."
"What happened to you?" Aayla queries, visibly shrugging off the thoughts that are troubling her. "I felt you using the Dark Side." She sounds more curious than disapproving, for which Anakin is grateful.
"I was at the Temple," he answers, "When I felt it. I was there when the clones came, and I – I didn't really understand what had happened to them. I only saw them killing the Jedi, and there were… younglings there, who the Emperor's new apprentice killed, and that was when I – Fell. I first touched the Dark then, and I helped many survivors flee the Temple, including Reva. I… went after Sidious, but I failed to kill him, and then, Reva and I came here, to Tatooine. We've been here ever since, and I have tried to use my abilities to free slaves when I can. I am the Shadow that Jabba has feared for so long."
Aayla leans toward him, nudging his shoulder. "Good," she replies passionately, "I know your use of the Dark is something most Jedi would frown on, but I know you, Anakin. I know I can trust you to do the right thing, or at least to try to. Now, I guess we can only try." A quiet huff. "No matter what Master Yoda might have said."
Anakin smirks a little at that, blowing out a breath and wrapping an arm around her shoulders, tucking her against his side. She fits there perfectly, just as she always has, and he feels a pang in his heart at that. So much has changed, and their relationship has changed, too, with time, growing and becoming more complicated in ways he can't even fully understand. "Will you help me?" he inquires. "In my fight?"
"You know I'll always be with you," she promises. "I'll stand by you, like I always have."
And it's then, that Anakin realizes he loves her, and not just in the way he loved her when they were younger. He loves her, a small, little spark in his chest that flickers and burns, humming with life at her presence.
It's nothing like he feels for Padme, though; nothing could ever compare. With Padme, his love is an all-consuming devotion, something that can overrule logic and common sense, and everything. He loves her with a fierceness that could rival the twin suns of Tatooine, and it's something that will never change, especially not when they have a child together. They have a future together, and it was the one thing that gave him something to hold onto during the war, something to look to, for when it was over, the promise of a family.
He loves Padme, more than almost anyone – there are exceptions, of course; his mother, his child who he has yet to see, Reva, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka chiefly among them – and this, whatever he feels for Aayla, will change nothing. It's Padme who he has a future with, a child with, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt a little to know that he'll have to let go of whatever he feels for Aayla. He can love her as a friend, a sister – if he can manage it after the things they've done together – but nothing more.
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